The Attackening: Revengeance (Completed)

[CheeseDeluxe]

This used to be a story about how a catboy pissed off his roommate and went grocery shopping together.

...dramatic changes, obviously.

[FKOD]

Tim: Use a healing flex to get Janis back in the fight.

Fuuuuuuulllllleeeeeeexxxx!



Hhhhhhheeeeeaaaaaal!

That felt kinda stupid! But it worked!

Azatoth: Fully heal yourself.

Do this by stealing some of Janis's HP.

Tim: Be so angered by this that you become powerful enough to break the turn based system and attack again. Unleash a tachnique so mighty that it kills Azatoth in one blow and simultaneously heals Janis.

yus

Azathoth: "What A wonderful idea!"

Unsurprisingly, Janis has far fewer Health Potatoes in her Stamina Stew than Azathoth does. He only heals by 40 points.
She is once more rendered unconscious.



Ooh, you have never been so irked. Vexed even. Even a trifle ticked.



SUPERIOR RAGETECH: FURIOUS FLYING FISTS OF FLAME: THE DRAGON QUEENS COURTIER'S ANGRY DRUNKEN NEPHEW'S IRE! UNSTOPPABLE BURNACLYSM OF PAINFUL FIREFULNESS!

Okay not technically one blow. But it is one attack, right?
Ouchies! It deals 638 damage! Azathoth has 400 HP remaining! However, Tim can't seem to deal that last bit of damage...

cyz from the future: appear.
cyz from now: go to the future and come back really quickly to avoid a paradox.

Umm... you get the feeling you may have miscalculated. Slightly. You aren't sure why you would feel that though.

[GreyGabe]

This used to be a story about how a catboy pissed off his roommate and went grocery shopping together.

...dramatic changes, obviously.

Indeed!

[1joe1]

Shenanigan axe time!

[Dragon Fogel]

All copies of Cyz: Combination attack!

[Bradley]

Paradox Cyz caused: Destroy the entire universe and kill EVERYONE, rendering the entire adventure pointless.

Tim: When you get to Heaven, smack Cyz upside the head for destroying reality.

[snoomanwaff]

All copies of Cyz: Combination attack!

Shenanigan axe time!

indeed...to both.

[FKOD]

All copies of Cyz: Combination attack!

Shenanigan axe time!

indeed...to both.

Cyz (present): "Hey, Azathoth! I'd like to axe you a question!"
Cyz (various): *snigger* *giggle*

Azathoth's health is knocked down to 1 HP!

One more hit should do it...





The other Cyzs (Cyzes? Cyzi?) go back to their own times. Or thereabouts.







Cyz and Shenanigan prepare the final strike!



Azathoth is forced down/up into the portal! Azathoth's lower half is forced all the way in, and the lower portal closes!
However, his upper half is hanging on for dear life...



Azathoth: "Death IS but a door... TIME is but a window... I WILL BE BACK!



Azathoth: "...Huh?"
Shenanigan: "Step right up, step right up folks! Test your strength! Test your strength here! Hit the bell and win a doll for your doll! How about it folks! Test your strength! How about you sir? You without the shirt? You look like a strapping young lad! Will you test your strength?"





Azathoth: "Wait you know I was just kidding about all that door and window stuff right?"



Azathoth: "Ow!"
Azathoth loses all remaining Respect Cookies from his Dignity Platter.
Shenanigan: "Well would ya lookit that? We have a winner!"



Shenanigan: "Here ya go, Sonny Jim."
Tim: "Aw yes. Giant teddy bear!"



Janis: "Aww! You won me a giant teddy bear!?"
Tim: "What? No I... Uh... yes. For you... Haha. Why would I want it, after all? The very idea is silly."



Everyone ever: "Daaaaaaawwwww!"



Shenanigan: "Good job, Cyz. We really showed that terrible horror from beyond time and space who's boss, huh?"
Cyz: "Yeppers."
Shenanigan: "Now, though, it's time for you to go after Emily! It's time for you to hunt him down and stop him from ruining reality any more than he already has!"
Cyz: "'Kay."
Shenanigan: "Now, if you'll excuse me... I've got some pranks to play."
Cyz: "Hold up just a second. How am I going to get to the future?"
Shenanigan: "...God like powers, teleportation, the fact that you're already in a time rift, any of this ringing a bell?"
Cyz: "Oh, right. 'Kay."



Expending the last of your god-powers, you open a portal to... the FFFFFFUUUUUUUUTUUUUUUURRRRRE! You can somehow sense exactly where Emily and company punched through.



You proceed through the portal, and into the unknown...



Part 1: Complete!
Good job, noble readers! Good job!
You attained:
15/15 Kittens!
5/5 Mugs!
???/??? Pants Soiled!
100% Completion!

You unlocked non-canon joke alternate ending!

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Paradox Cyz caused: Destroy the entire universe and kill EVERYONE, rendering the entire adventure pointless.

Tim: When you get to Heaven, smack Cyz upside the head for destroying reality.

Mysterious Death Goddess: "Hold up a sec! Who the heck are you people!? And how did you get here!?"



MDG: "And just what do you think you're doing here!?"

[GreyGabe]

That will show that Azathoth who is in charge 'round here!

So now we have a choice;
Do we do part two in another topic, or stick with this one for now? It is up to you guys I guess.

Also! Any thoughts? Suggestions? Criticisms? Let us know!

[Tappipappa]

*clap*
*clap*




*clap*

[Xander]

I think a new topic is in order. Will the next one be just as crazy and involve a Tim that ISN'T fueled by rage?

[GreyGabe]

It would hardly be the Attackening if it wasn't absolutely crazy! So it will be!

As for the characters who will be involved, though? My lips are sealed. Er... my fingers are sealed. My keyboard is sealed?
Something like that.

[Bradley]

Will the next one be just as crazy and involve a Tim that ISN'T fueled by rage?

I wouldn't want to live in a world where Tim isn't fueled by rage.

[Xander]

ok. well then.
==>

[Kaitostrike]

By the gods!
...
Literally.

[Hype]

I think azaroth would totally have soiled his transdimensional pants right before Tim took that hammer to his face. I believe we deserve them and all their power.

[FKOD]

EPILOGUE


A love is kindled, a new day begins...


A prankster god knows that there are other worlds than this one...


A noble Drunkard is returned home... with some guests...


A scholar and a bard make the best of what they have... until the day they can return home...


Loose ends tied up, a chapter ends... but a new one is just beginning...

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Okay, so! The next chapter will start before new long in a new topic. We just wanted to show some things that happened after Cyz left and before he arrived... Way before.

Join us next time in... The Attackening: A Switch in Time!

[CheeseDeluxe]

*clap clap clap*
*...clap?*

[piester]

Crystal Raver: Kick Cyz in the nuts, because why not, his adventure's done

[Xander]

So, when does the next one start?

[Dragon Fogel]

Excellent work, both of you! This is one of my favorites.

Eagerly awaiting the next topic.

[CheeseDeluxe]

Crystal Raver: Kick Cyz in the nuts, because why not, his adventure's done

But Crystal Raver's isn't.

DAMN YOU RED

[Schazer]

Yaaay! Excellent work, guys. This was a great read.

[Phevnil]

I haven't read this yet, but I gather that I should. Is there a mirror around anywhere?

[GreyGabe]

I'm... working on one. It's taking me awhile, but now that it's finished I'll try to put a rush on it.