Mr. Fuzzleton's Funtime Adventure Quest(COMPLETED..abruptly)

[Anathema]

>EAT THE PIXIE

Absolutely! They're the reason this all happened after all.

[Gustave]

>inquire as to whether the pixie has seen any of your companions.

[ragmaan]

>Steal the pixies dust and use it on the pixie for revenge.

[McBatman]

>EAT THE PIXIE

FUZZLETON: The looks nothing but friendly, floating about and even giggling! Yet, you feel... hungry.

Mmmm. Magically delicious.

Suddenly, everything seems out of focus... fuzzy... uh oh. You think you're beginning to freak out.

[RedMage]

Fuzzleton: Freak the fuck out.

[McBatman]

Fuzzleton: Freak the fuck out.

FUZZLETON: Uh oh.

As you rock back and forth in your tripped out state, something unseen drags off the remains of SHELDON TORTOISE.

[DimJim]

This is becoming really scary.

[A Madman]

>Fuzzleton: Popinjays and lollipops! This curious delicacy is a most uncanny experience! Take a gander at these hands of yours! Your altered appendages seem to span across the oceans of the void, grasping at the very strings at reality itself! To think, with a careless sweep of the finger you could bring the downfall of the work of eons! The taste of the very meaning of our own existences hangs carelessly inches from your mouth, a forbidden apple which could very well undo the last shreds of your sanity! Can such things be? Or is this merely an incorporeal fantasy, the results of a wasted lifetime of trivial meanderings, dwarfed by the sheer significance of these omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient images which swirl just out of reach of your consciousness? Is there another fine soul around? Perhaps they can verify this simultaneously frightening and awe inspiring vision of yours! Call out to your allies, for surely we are in a time of strife!

THIS IS THE ONLY THREAD WHERE I CAN GET AWAY WITH CRAP LIKE THIS FORGIVE ME

[GreyGabe]

THIS IS THE ONLY THREAD WHERE I CAN GET AWAY WITH CRAP LIKE THIS FORGIVE ME

Forgive? What is there to forgive? This stuff is brilliant! Brilliantly hilarious!

[DimJim]

Uhh..

>Everse?

[A Madman]

This stuff is brilliant!

I thank you, kind sir. Your soothing words are like honey to my broken and shattered psyche.

>Everse?

I think it's Evert, if you're referencing that one game.

[Crowstone]

>Sleep

again, BEST ADVENTURE EVER

[McBatman]

>Fuzzleton: Popinjays and lollipops! This curious delicacy is a most uncanny experience! Take a gander at these hands of yours! Your altered appendages seem to span across the oceans of the void, grasping at the very strings at reality itself! To think, with a careless sweep of the finger you could bring the downfall of the work of eons! The taste of the very meaning of our own existences hangs carelessly inches from your mouth, a forbidden apple which could very well undo the last shreds of your sanity! Can such things be? Or is this merely an incorporeal fantasy, the results of a wasted lifetime of trivial meanderings, dwarfed by the sheer significance of these omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient images which swirl just out of reach of your consciousness? Is there another fine soul around? Perhaps they can verify this simultaneously frightening and awe inspiring vision of yours! Call out to your allies, for surely we are in a time of strife!

THIS IS THE ONLY THREAD WHERE I CAN GET AWAY WITH CRAP LIKE THIS FORGIVE ME

FUZZLETON: Oh tripe and bollox. This is a certainly no way to meander about in such a precarious precipice of perception! You must certainly get your marbles together old bean, less we find ourselves in a most unfortuitous turnabout of trepidation! Simply put, you call for help. Unfortunately for you old chap, it seems something has indeed heard you! Friend or foe or forager? We'll certainly see in a moment.

Great galloping ghosts, it's your dear acquaintance PETUNIA RABBIT! She survived her ever so perilous descent from the misgivings of your airship. She is overwhelmed with delight and relief to see her dear friend MR. FUZZLETON.

Unfortunately, it seems reality is still beyond your fuzzy clutches, as PETUNIA RABBIT appears to be trying to devour your fluffy little soul.

MR. FUZZLETON goes nappy-bye from the overwhelming feelings of excitement and trepidation. He begins to foam at the mouth.


Goodness gracious! What an unpleasant dream! What tomfoolery had you been engaging in to send such shivers down your fibers? No matter, SHELDON TORTOISE assures you, we're all having tea!

Ah yes, the gang is all here. Your dear friend and old schoolmate, SHELDON TORTOISE. Your best pal in the all the world, SIR OINKSALOT. Your trusted companion, HELMSMAN GOBBLES. Oh look, he's finally learned to fly without the aid of an airship! How delightful! Oh, and how could you forget your oldest and dearest friend, MADAME PIXIE? She made everyone tea with her magical PIXIE DUST! Oh the wonder and excitement you all share!

Yes sir, all of us here, all together, all alone...

All alone... alone... alone...

Alone.

GYAH! Good gravy what was that about?! It's... yes... it's coming back to you now. That horrible PIXIE creature and its infernal dust. Guh, you'd be good to bring a good spray of PIXIECIDE with you next time! But, where on Gumdrop Mountain are you?

You see PETUNIA RABBIT... yes, you remember now, she carried you back here. And there's HAROLD T. CATTINGTON. He's injured, but still in high spirits. PETUNIA is sitting by... oh dear me. But that bowler hat, can it be? Yes! OINKSALOT!

[A Madman]

>Fuzzleton: Such a tremendously joyous occasion! A truly heartbreaking reunion! Though the circumstances are less the ideal, you cannot help but shed a silent, heartfelt tear of relief! Undoubtably, with your dearest compadres alongside you, hope remains a shining omnipresent beacon, the lighthouse on the horizon.
But what of the current situation? You know what they say, a thousand thrown rocks tell you nothing of the size of the elephant. Inquire as to the details of the current predicament, have them spare not the slightest detail!

[thriggle]

>Ask where your old chum Sheldon wandered off to.

[Crowstone]

>Enter tent!

[McBatman]

>Enter tent!

FUZZLETON: You enter the tent, wanting to see how OINKSALOT is doing. The sight before you fills you with several rather contemptuous feelings.

Well if that isn't the cat's pajamas, you can no longer hold down the contents of your fuzzy little stomach. It seems OINKSALOT had to endure quite a heavy amount of stitching to save him last night, but he seems to have taken a FEVER. PETUNIA RABBIT pats your back reassuringly.

[Crowstone]

>Inventory supplies!

[aichmophile]

> PETUNIA RABBIT: Become increasingly livid.
> MR. FUZZLETON: Crush pixies in your fist to begin RACE WAR.

[A Madman]

>What a frightening turn of events! Direct your gaze from this ghoulish scene! What brutish terror has befallen your dear friend? What is the cause of this sadness? Dearest Petunia, what madness is this? Where do we find ourselves on this dark and disastrous day?

[McBatman]

>What a frightening turn of events! Direct your gaze from this ghoulish scene! What brutish terror has befallen your dear friend? What is the cause of this sadness? Dearest Petunia, what madness is this? Where do we find ourselves on this dark and disastrous day?

> PETUNIA RABBIT: Become increasingly livid.

PETUNIA RABBIT: You dry your BUTTON EYES as you begin to recall the events after you PARACHUTED on your PARASOL.

You recall landing a good few meters away from the crash scene, as you had jumped out in time to avoid landing too close to the initial crash.

You approached the crash sight with great caution, as the commotion had stirred up a nest of PIXIES, which you remember reading in STUFFED MEDICAL MONTHLY, can induce HALLUCINATIONS in a person if exposed to their DUST.

You approached the main wreckage with great caution...

You were met with great terror at the sight of the wreckage.

The carnage was unbearable. You could smell burnt fabric in the air, as well as the unmistakable scent of stuffing. Great amounts of it. You were quite unnerved by the severed head of JEFFREY GIRAFFE.

You were then distracted from the terror from a faint call for help from a voice you recognized, great jellybeans, it was OINKSALOT!

However, it was no tea party and biscuits when you found him. He had been launched from the AIRSHIP upon impact, expelling a great deal of STUFFING, as his ABDOMEN had burst open.

Taking an emergency SEWING KIT you had in your pocket, since you work part time as a TAILOR, you were trained to close up wounds on the field, but never something as severe as this. Especially with no NUTMEG for anesthesia!

You pause from your story as you become overwhelmed with EMOTION.

[RedMage]

> my, my! The poor dear has had quite a horrible experience with this series of frightful events! I should most definitely calm miss Petunia in a most gentlemanly fashion so as she may brave on her story to the likes of our current dire situation!


in modern english: Calm Petunia down.

[A Madman]

>There there, dearest PETUNIA. This is sufficient. You have clearly performed to the utmost of your abilities. Were it now for your gallant efforts, it is clear that OINKSALOT would no longer be among us.
Let us not press her like this, especially in such delicate circumstances. We must hope for the best! Perhaps there are distinguishing landmarks in this general vicinity? Surely the warm embrace of safety lies nearby!

[McBatman]

> my, my! The poor dear has had quite a horrible experience with this series of frightful events! I should most definitely calm miss Petunia in a most gentlemanly fashion so as she may brave on her story to the likes of our current dire situation!


in modern english: Calm Petunia down.

FUZZLETON: With some hesitation, you present PETUNIA with a single CANDY CANE, and of course, a LIGHT to go with it. PETUNIA gives you a dirty look for a moment, as she specifically asked you to take those infernal candy delights away from her before the trip, as she was trying to kick the habit.

After contemplating for a moment, she takes the CANDY CANE and takes a deep inhale, calming down substantially. She relaxes as she recalls the rest of the night.

PETUNIA: After you had stitched OINKSALOT back together, you carried him with you as followed the sound of whimpering in the woods. You had managed to fashion a bed to drag OINKSALOT with (what are those things called?).

It was at that point you had heard a faint but familiar cry for help. When you investigated, you discovered FUZZLETON in his PIXIE DUST induced FREAK OUT. FUZZLETON had passed out, requiring you to place both he and OINKSALOT on the makeshift stretcher, where you dragged both of them through the woods until morning.

You had discovered drag tracks near the wreckage and several footprints, so you figured other survivors had made their way from the wreckage. It seems a few had survived with light injuries or non-life threatening ones, and had begun to setup a makeshift camp by the time you arrived. You had only been resting under your half-tent about half an hour before finally waking up.

[Wesley Foxx]

>Ask SIR COIL if he can divine your current whereabouts from a higher perch upon the tree so as to better plan how to proceed.

(This is becoming one of my favorite adventures. If nothing else for the mix of cute stuffed animals and Saving Private Ryan style horrific moments.)