Omegle

**xyzzy** · 09-11-2009, 06:47 PM

I was in the middle of typing "That is all I ask" when he disconnected.

This is an experiment which I will probably repeat at a later date.

**JoshuaPsivero_** · 09-11-2009, 07:30 PM

I made up that story in the beginning. I was tired of not having anything to say in chats.

Massive post!

**saltywaters** · 09-11-2009, 07:54 PM

That was a genuinely entertaining conversation.

**JoshuaPsivero_** · 09-11-2009, 07:54 PM

*bows*

**saltywaters** · 09-11-2009, 07:56 PM

It is good that you are in the habit of bowing to me. Soon all will, but I take notice of such things.

**Ziggy Stardust** · 09-11-2009, 08:53 PM

I don't like using OMEgle. They all assume that I want to have sex with them over the internet. I could just go out and find real sex!
People are not smart.

**Byrobot** · 09-11-2009, 10:24 PM

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: hi
Stranger: hi
Stranger: from?
You: boston
You: you?
Stranger: china
You: hi!
Stranger: nice to meetu
You: congratulations on your country's growth and success
Stranger: wow,how do u know?
You: i follow the news very closely.
You: have you ever heard of BRIC?
Stranger: okay,so u work as?
Stranger: no?,what is it?
You: in finance
You: BRIC is
You: Brazil Russia India China
You: the 4 wealthiest nations of the 21st century
Stranger: cool.i study finance
You: china being the top
Stranger: yeah ,i know it
You: you know your country will have double the GDP of the U.S. by 2050?
Stranger: we caLL BRIC JINZHUANSIGUO
You: interesting!
You: i hope our countries can work together to bring peace to the world
Stranger: UM, double the GDP of the U.S. by 2050 NO
Stranger: HEHE
You: yeah i am wrong
You: more like 2100
You: but still a lot
Stranger: yeah
You: 20 trillion or something by 2050
Stranger: it is just a target
Stranger: hehe
You: well
You: that's what goldman sachs said
You: they are pretty impartial
You: what area of finance are you interested in?
Stranger: um,my major is accounting
You: well that is useful
Stranger: yeah ,last year my major is finance,to find a job easy i change my major to accounting
You: smart
Stranger: hehe
You: i think people worry too much about liking their job
You: jobs aren't for fun they are for money right
Stranger: in usa ?
You: its what you do with the rest of your time that is you
You: yeah
You: people go to college
Stranger: yeah ,ur right
Connection asploded.

**Warriorccc0** · 09-11-2009, 11:04 PM

You: Do you like bagels?
You: I like bagels.
You: Do you have any bagels?
Stranger: me too
Stranger: i like cream cheese
Stranger: regular
Stranger: in the freezer
You: Can I have them.
You: Your babies, I mean.
Stranger: ill fed ex them to you fosho
You: kthx
Stranger: extra foam wrap then

**saltywaters** · 09-11-2009, 11:11 PM

See. This is why I can't watch the news Fox anymore

I get all worked up over the Chinese being evil and going to take over the USA, and here is a perfectly nice Chinese person who clearly has no interest in taking over America.

Conclusion? I'm getting my news from the internet.

**Warriorccc0** · 09-12-2009, 12:02 AM

You: >_>
You: <_<
Stranger: whats going on
You: JUST TAKE THIS BAG AND DON'T ASK ANY QUESTIONS
You have disconnected.

**Reibear** · 09-12-2009, 12:51 AM

Oh, my friend also trawls through omegle for shits and giggles, though the chatlogs he has sent me gave me the impression that every other person on the site is some kind of caveman soliciting you for cyber sex.

Here's some chatlogs.

Stranger: hay..
You: If you say ASL during this conversation, you owe me five cashmonies
You: Hello!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: Hello, stranger.
Stranger: talk dirtyy
You: ok
You: mud
You: sludge
You: grime
You: uh
You: pollutants
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

**cyber95** · 09-12-2009, 12:55 AM

Originally Posted by Reibear

Oh, my friend also trawls through omegle for shits and giggles, though the chatlogs he has sent me gave me the impression that every other person on the site is some kind of caveman soliciting you for cyber sex.

Yeah, sounds about right.

**Malink** · 09-12-2009, 01:53 AM

These are fucking hilarious.

**TheAtomicMan** · 09-12-2009, 01:53 AM

apparently people on that site dont like to talk to drink people what the hell is that about

**Malink** · 09-12-2009, 01:54 AM

Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
Stranger: (a myspace link was here)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I'm scared to click it.

Edit: REMOVED

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
Stranger: m or f
You: h
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Ten bucks to anyone who can guess what the other person was thinking.

cto:

Stranger: hi
You: you're a fast one
You: was that copy and paste?
Stranger: no
You: fastest hi in the west
Stranger: haha lamo
You: quickdraw time
You: TEN PACES
You: THEN TURN AND GREET
You: READY GO
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
Stranger: m?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I didn't even get a chance.

**Reibear** · 09-12-2009, 02:49 AM

Well, here's the rest of my friend's chatlogs, the best ones are the first and last ones.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Let us talk about SCIENCE
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: [+]

(it is a nurse)
Stranger: id tap that nurse
Stranger: :O
You: This is not a game of Magic: The Gathering.
You: I fail to see how you could tap it
You: GET IT

Stranger: female ?
You: oh neat
You: What about females?
Stranger: are u a female ?
You: Do you mean gender-wise, or sex-wise?
Stranger: lol both
Stranger: ( :
You: Well fine
You: I am male on both counts~
Stranger: fucken lame as tweeker

**Malink** · 09-12-2009, 02:53 AM

Ahahaha... I really like your friend's style.

**Miraculous** · 09-12-2009, 04:12 AM

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: Do you have any idea how nerdy I feel right now?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Wait, maybe I'm supposed to say horny?

Edit: I still don't think I'm getting the hang of this.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: Wait, let me see if I'm doing this right. A/S/How do you feel about horses?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: m or f
You: Female horses are far more exquisite.
You: Wait wait wait, how about paintings with horses and football players?
Stranger: lol
Stranger: do u have webcam
You: Yes, but it's currently in the stable.
You: With the horses.
Stranger: lol
Stranger: want to show me ur tits
You: You assume I have tits.
Stranger: well i hope u do if u are femal
You: If you look up, you'll notice I never once mentioned the presence of tits, breasts, or a female gender.
Stranger: yeh
Stranger: female
You: No no, that was the horse.
You: THE horse.
Stranger: your pathetic
You: I don't think I mentioned that either.
Stranger: pretty sure i saw you on 3 guys 1 horse
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I'm getting better, I got someone with a capital letter this time!

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: Okay, before we get into a deep and meaningful conversation, be aware this shall be quoted.
Stranger: Quote?
You: Oh, it shall be quoted. It shall be quoted and commented upon wittily.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And people say there are no heroes left in the world today.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
Stranger: hi what state do you live in? m/f and do u have a webcam?

You: My god, you have the typing speed of a god.
Stranger: thanks
You: I felt that sentence rush by me in a whir of IM wizardry.
Stranger: my wpm count is through the roof
You: I mean, honestly, I feel wowed to be in the presence of such a master of the keyboard.
You: Do bards spin tales of your legendary use of the QWERTY system? Do young choir lads sing praises of your lightning fast typing fingers?
Stranger: yes they do and now im off to save teh intarwebz
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Look, I've even tried to be helpful!

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Omegle is not a dating site. Please try to have interesting conversations here!
You: Hold on, hold on. You see that thing in front of you, with all the letters and numbers?
You: Okay, bear with me here, this is the tricky part. I need you to press those buttons with all the numbers and letters to form some sort of communication. A message, if you will, of the instant variety.
You: Then, when you think you have constructed a charismatic phrase of epic philosophy and resounding poetry, press the button marked 'Enter'.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

**tynic** · 09-12-2009, 06:32 AM

You just singlehandedly redeemed this ridiculous thread.

**saltywaters** · 09-12-2009, 09:59 AM

Hmmm...Trolling Omegel pleases the great Mods....

Brb

**tynic** · 09-12-2009, 10:06 AM

Only if you do it well.

I have my doubts.

**Leaf** · 09-12-2009, 10:22 AM

The logs from Miraculous are, quite possibly, the funniest I have seen yet.

I tip of my hat you, good sir.

Also, everything I read from tynic, I now read in Dr. Henry Killinger's voice...

**saltywaters** · 09-12-2009, 10:51 AM

I fail miserably at trolling. Every time I try, I end up having a meaningful conversation with incredibly nice Chinese people.

**Jonny Boy** · 09-12-2009, 11:23 AM

Stranger: hello
You: WHOA
You: I didn't see you there.
Stranger: right.. what's up dude?
You: HOLY SHIT
You: Stop sneaking up on me like that!
You: You must be some sort of ninja.
Stranger: how do you knew that?!
You: OH MY- geeze. Quit doing that!
You: I swear.
Stranger: okay. WELL i have really personal question for you.
You: One of these days, you'll sneak up on me, and I'll have a knife in my hand.
Stranger: do you like frogs?
You: THEN who'll be laughing?
You: Me!
You: HAHAHA.
You: See? I just laughed. That proves I'm laughing.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: Hello.
You: You've won a free laptop.
You: Or something.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hey
You: is for horses.
You: See what I did there?
Stranger: yeah, very clever
Stranger: haha
You: is...
You: what the Joker says.
You: But only when he's laughing.
You: Otherwise he's saying words.
You: Or not saying anything.
You: Or when he's dead.
You: Which is never.
You: Because he's the joker.
You have disconnected.

Stranger: hey asl
You: Asl isn't a name.
You: How did you even guess.
You: Silly.
Stranger: it means age sex location
You: No.
You: It means artichoke salami limburger
Stranger: wow
You: None of which I like.
You: Thus.
You: It is not my name.
You: QED
Stranger: ok m/f
Stranger: ?
You: Are you calling me a hermaphrodite?
Stranger: i dont know what that is r u a male or female
Stranger: ?
You: Can I buy a vowel?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: No I'm not.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: i need serious help
Stranger: i'm addicted to porn
You: Porn isn't a drug.
You: Silly.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: MY LIFE FORCE IS DWINDLING RAPIDLY
Stranger: mine too. over 9000
You: Pathetic.
You: Just
You: Pathetic.
You: No.
Stranger: it's not nice to talk like that about your mother
You: Don't even
You: Over 9000.
You: No.
You: Never again.
You: Never forget.
You: Never leave a man behind.
Stranger: that's what your mom said.
You: I agree.
You have disconnected.

You: OH SHIT CROWS
Stranger: Where?!
You: EVERYWHERE
Stranger:

OHNOES!
You: QUICK HARRY
Stranger: Are they going to eat us?
You: HIDE IN THE SCHOOL
You: I'LL FEND THEM OFF
Stranger: AVADA KAVARA.
Stranger: They died!

You: YOU SPELLED IT WRONG
Stranger: SHUT UP.
Stranger: I'm dumb.
You: YOU'VE DOOMED US ALL
You: OH SHIT.
You: THEY HAVE AK-47S
Stranger:

Stranger: I'M SORRY!
You: *is shot about five billion times no thanks to you*
You have disconnected.

Stranger: m/f
You: s
Stranger: ex??
You: SUPERMAN
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

**Fyvush** · 09-12-2009, 08:25 PM

Because I was not prepared to talk to someone who was not an asshole, a fictitious Congolese Ã©migrÃ© to Detroit has quite inadvertently gained what appears to be a factual pen-pal in China.

Needless to say I'm feeling some shame, embarrassment, and contrition. Simply letting it drop is an option, but given what I think is a reasonable application of a duly contextualized ethic of reciprocity, it seems to me that the honorable thing to do is to give a thoroughly truthful account of who I am (accompanied of course by an explanation of the conceit and its motivation). A formal apology to humanity for any undeserved scorn is also forthcoming.

Do you have any feelings about this matter, Internet? Do you think that this is the most reasonable way to satisfactorily resolve it? Or can you think of some superior course of action?

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