Dastardly Criminal Elements In Space [Epilogue On Page 11]

[thriggle]

You are one of the galaxy's most feared gangsters, hands down the most notorious combination bookie, loan shark, spice dealer, information broker, extortionist, racketeer, slave trader, orphan eater, and party thrower this side of the Hydian Way. Thugs, minions, yes beings, hangers on, primitive mystics, sycophants, slaves, droid butlers, and exotic appendage dancers constantly fawn over you as you dine on endangered species and gallon-sized goblets of the most priceless interstellar blood wines.


Enter your name:

[RedMage]

*star wars reference name*
no.

>Galxoorr

[Bradley]

Mark Leonard Stevenson.

[Dragon Fogel]

>Bob the Drip.

[Avi]

The Dread Gangster Roberts

[thriggle]

>Galxoorr

Mark Leonard Stevenson.

>Bob the Drip.

The Dread Gangster Roberts

You are, of course, the Dread Gangster Leonard "Galxoorr the Drip" Roberts, scourge of the spaceways etcetera. You must have been so deeply enjoying the back rub from your droid masseuse that you forgot it for a second.

Anyway, what's on the agenda for today?

[Avi]

Purchasing a fearsome hat

[Dr Evil42]

Purchasing a fearsome hat

If fearsome hat means Fedora then Second.

[GreyGabe]

>Put a bounty out on someone. Doesn't really matter who.

[Dr Evil42]

>Put a bounty out on someone. Doesn't really matter who.

While wearing a Fedora.

[thriggle]

Purchasing a fearsome hat

"Purchase"? A crime lord does not purchase that which can be taken! Although your head is a bit underdecorated for someone of your glory. A space fedora would surely be quite fetching.

>Put a bounty out on someone. Doesn't really matter who.

You decide to place a bounty on the head of a certain local haberdasher. Surely the gentleman will be dead within minutes.

Now, to collect that hat.

Shall we send one of our colorful rogues to retrieve a hat for your slimy pate, or shall we make the trip in person?

[RedMage]

send colorful rogue #772: Carmen Sandiego.

[Dr Evil42]

Make trip in person. Your presence will strike fear in all around you.

[Dragon Fogel]

>Send a monochrome rogue. That haberdasher isn't good enough for the colorful ones.

[GreyGabe]

>Pfft. Going in person would require, y'know, moving. Screw that. Send octopus head over there. He looks like he's eager and ready to go a-murdering.

[thriggle]

Make trip in person. Your presence will strike fear in all around you.

You decide to go in person. You were starting to get dais sores from sitting around all day anyway.

send colorful rogue #772: Carmen Sandiego.

>Send octopus head over there. He looks like he's eager and ready to go a-murdering.

As you gradually make your way to the door, you grab the lovely Carmen, one of your favorite thieves, to accompany you and provide you some protection. You tell Squidward, a gunslinger and jazz musician, to come along too, since on second thought a thief might not be the best protection.

You leave the audience chamber and gradually reach a fork in the corridor.

Do you want to go LEFT to the garage, FORWARD out the front door, or RIGHT to the docking bay?

[RedMage]

ceiling.

[GreyGabe]

>Right. Why walk ooze when you can fly?

[thriggle]

ceiling.

You spend a few hours crawling up to the ceiling, to your longsuffering minions' obvious delight.

>Right. Why walk ooze when you can fly?

Eventually you stop fooling around and head to the docking bay.

Ah, yes; there's that beautiful ship of yours.

[GreyGabe]

>Fly to the haberdashery and land on its roof.

[Bluecho]

>Fly to the haberdashery and land on his face.

Fixed.

[Avi]

fly to Dapper City to find a haberdashery

[thriggle]

>Fly to the haberdashery and land on its roof/face.

You start sliding toward your-- WHA?!


CHEESE IT, IT'S THE FUZZ!

[RedMage]

cheezedeluxe: Ominously walk out of the ship.

[GreyGabe]

>Activate your suspensor buoys and float away! Scream, "You'll never catch me, Atreides scum!"