Superman? Yeah, that makes it much more bearable to me, especially since I've read "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex".
I keep forgetting though, there's a little problem with the shirt symbol for Shula that was suggested by Wigmund back on page 10:
Originally Posted by Wigmund
She uses the astrological symbol for Earth since she's the first troll born here.
When I looked it up on the Windows character map, I found U+2641 ♁ referred to as "Earth", while U+2295 ⊕ was "Circled Plus". Wikipedia seems to swing both ways. ⊕ or ♁?
And I wasn't kidding when I said "let's play who's that grubling"
Huh, you could use ⊕ for Shula and then ♁ for Nepeta's kid (mixed joke, second earth child and also referencing the Holy Hand Grenade in that the kid's a bundle of energy like mother and explosive like father).
@Skaian: I didn't lose any drive, it's just that I'm paranoid....and rather ill...which don't work well together. I plan on the last part of Storybook Story to be finished sometime today and later on doing the epilogue. Meanwhile you need to enjoy The Princess Bride.
Then I have ideas for a series of stories set between the Troll Christmas and the beginning of Storybook
Huh, you could use ⊕ for Shula and then ♁ for Nepeta's kid (mixed joke, second earth child and also referencing the Holy Hand Grenade in that the kid's a bundle of energy like mother and explosive like father).
I did another one-shot fic.
Good lord this one is too long.
Ugh.
Laughter
Dave crawls out of his bed and grabs his shades. He can’t be seen without them, it’s his first order of business each day to don these bad boys. He hops out bed and gets dressed as per usual. He’s not narcissistic but he watches himself pose and flex in the mirror for a short time, he supposes it is ironic, but he’s just not really sure.
He would check pesterchum, but he knows the only person ever on this early is usually John. John gets up so early and it makes no sense, doesn’t he have better things to do than chat with friends? Dave ponders a moment and shakes his head, “Nope..There ain’t nothing more important than friends.” He mutters to himself as he enters the bathroom.
“Never drink a bottle of Apple Juice before bed and expect it to not want out in the morning…” Dave uses the restroom casually; he hums to himself on his new jams he made with some common supplies. He hears a subtle creak at the door.
“Someone’s in here!” he shouts.
“Hee hee….” The voice sounds feminine, that of a young girl.
Dave flushes a light red, “Listen babe, don’t go p-peeping on me. That’s sick.” He was embarrassed, a little mad, but embarrassed. He turns to the door only to find it is already closed. “Guess she’s a shy one….perverted, but shy…” He finishes his business and washes his hands. He leaves the bathroom and heads for the dining room.
Breakfast was set out on the table, Dave takes his seat and begins to chow down on the delicious bacon and eggs. He takes a few quick sips of his Orange Juice and goes back to his meal. After the events of Sburb he found himself alone in his home without his brother. Eventually rent could not be paid, and he was kicked out onto the streets. A little girl took him to the orphanage she lived at and they took him in post-haste. Dave doesn’t exactly enjoy being stuck in this place, but it’s a lot better than living off the street.
After finishing his breakfast he leaves the dishes where they are. Scoots out of his chair and then,
“…you should clean up after yourself…hee hee…” The feminine voice spoke again.
Dave turns to face her, he believes it is the girl who brought him here merely teasing him playfully. She has always been nice to him, and always very shy. Dave shook it off and laughed, he was kind of happy to have her do this. It reminded him of Bro in a way, except rather than fuck his shit up, she usually reminded him to do things he’d otherwise forget.
He goes to the living room and sits down on the couch. The other kids at the orphanage are watching a bland TV show for kids. The screen flashes vibrant colors as the crudely drawn characters run across a field of flowers and teach the children about letters and numbers. Dave is reminded of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, he misses drawing the comic to entertain his friends. The computer at the orphanage just wasn’t up to par with the one he had back at his old apartment.
Regardless, he sat down and decided to take a break and just lose himself in some mindless (?) television. The voice acting for the show was terrible to say the least, and the kids around him would not stop laughing. They would count along and Dave would die a little on the inside. He takes a breath in to start talking shit, only the words “Man this show is so fuc-“
“You shouldn’t swear…” It was the girl again, okay, she was beginning to get annoying today, “hee hee…”
Dave gets up and walks in the direction he heard her voice. He peeks around the door slowly, no sign of her. She’s a crafty little girl, shy, but crafty. Dave shouts aloud, “Hey Mr. Sandson! I am going outside!” He waited for an answer but knew he wouldn’t get one. Dave could just run away and that guy wouldn’t notice, but at the same time that man knew Dave, nor any of the kids, would run away. He even left the door unlocked at all times. Dave supposes it may be ironic, or just the owner of the orphanage mocking him and all the other children.
“So….yeah…bye.”
Dave exits the orphanage and walks casually down the street. He pulls out his cell phone from his pocket and holds it into the air, hoping to get some sign of a possible connection. He finds himself walking all the way to the park before he gets any decent bars. He decides to take this chance to go on pesterchum. By now Jade or Rose should be on too. As luck would have it, Jade is on.
Show pesterlog
- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:12 am –
TG: sup
GG: hi dave!! :)
TG: how are you doing
GG: pretty good! you?
TG: just fine
TG: that girls being weird again
GG: do you think she likes you?! :o
TG: fuck i hope not
TG: i like being single
GG: :) then let her down gently!
TG: how
GG: you’re really asking me for advice with women??
GG: :?
TG: oh yeah good point
TG: ill handle this shit myself
TG: got an idea
GG: goodbye and good luck!!!
TG: later
- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:20 am –
Dave puts his cell phone away and looks at the busy streets. It was rush hour now. Or rather, twenty minutes into it. He walks casually to the STOP sign and waits for a moment to cross the street. The cars rush by, blinkers flashing, music blaring, so much to take in it amazes Dave he has yet to spaz out from it.
In a faint whisper he hears her again, “…are you gonna do it…?” it giggled it usually laugh, “hee hee…”
“..fucking what…” Dave could turn to look at her, but his mind was set on the road. The cars whipping past him and the cold pavement beneath the hot rubber.
“..you never run away…hee hee….you just always contemplate…” she mocks him, she is mocking Dave.
“Listen babe, don’t try calling me out on this…I do it to be ironic…”
“…that’s your excuse for everything…”
Dave turns around and for the first time in months is face to face with her. Pale skin, eyes blue and as cold as a glacier. Her hair goes down to her shoulders, a blank smile is on her face. She is wearing a very simple dress with the word GAL on it, it makes her look immature and silly. Despite this her cheeks are a rosy red and she wears a lovely necklace. He stares at her blankly, Dave can’t confront her like this, those soulless eyes of hers simply unnerve him to no end.
He steps away from her, he has completely forgotten about the cars passing by. As luck would have it he snaps to as a loud horn honks at him, he turns to look, the headlights blind him as he jumps out of the way. Scraping his knee and breaking his shades. He looks around him, trying to hide his eyes as best he can. The girl is gone again, she always does this to him, but something about her was especially wrong today.
Dave sits in the park for what feels like an eternity until the moon comes up. The blisteringly hot sun has gone down, and with that brought forth the cooling timid Moon. Dave stands up and feels his muscles ache. He rushes back to the orphanage, he hopes he isn’t late for dinner.
Dave stumbles in, falling down again. He is simply far too sore to move easily. He crawls back up and keeps a palm pressed against the wall for support, trying to hide his eyes. Getting back to his room he reaches for his spare shades and slides them on.
“hee hee….”
Dave simply can not stand her anymore. She has been so disturbing today, she nearly had gotten him killed. He turns to face her and on a whim she kisses him on the lips and scurries off like a cockroach in daylight. He stands there dumbfounded for a while. “The hell…is her deal?”
He goes to the dining room, all the other kids are already finished eating. All of them but himself and that girl should be. He only sees one plate out, so she must’ve eaten quickly. He sits down and begins to eat in a chill manner, but she is getting to him. Her damn mind games.
Mr. Sandson walks up to Dave and places Lil Cal on the table. He grumbles, “You musn’t leave your toys out Dave.” He puts a stern look on his face. “I don’t want you playing in the street or leaving this alone on the sidewalk. it could’ve been stolen.” He huffs and walks away, “That being said…I am glad you are unharmed.”
Dave looks at Lil Cal, stares at him. Those eyes.
“hee hee…”
Dave turns around, he looks everywhere for her. She is always just out of view, but always in ear shot. Damn her. Dave takes Lil Cal and heads off to his room for bed. He has dealt with enough shit for the day.
His dream is horrible. He shakes and stirs in his sleep. Laughter, mockery and laughter is all he hears. Her voice is so soft and soothing, but its tone is as sharp and painful as a knife to the throat. He woke up and coughed and wheezed, he took in a deep breath just to make sure he was still alive.
He felt around his bed, he was sure he had left Lil Cal right beside him. He opens his eyes and turns on the lights in his room, Lil Cal is nowhere to be found.
“hee hee…”
Her. She must’ve taken Cal. She is causing too much trouble for Dave to take, he is fed up with this shit. He chases her down, her laughter gets louder and louder as he scampers up to the roof of the orphanage. He climbs the staircase, only getting minor glimpses of her. He finally gets to the rooftop and sees her holding Cal over the edge of the roof.
“Don’t you even dare.” He points a finger and glares at her coldly, he will not have this shit go down. Cal was the last thing he had of Bro’s, and he did not intend to lose it.
“hee hee….” Her grip on Cal loostens.
“Don’t…you fucking dare…” He steps closer to her, he grits his teeth. He is not kidding around.
“……” She stares at Dave and lets go of Cal. “..hee hee….”
Dave doesn’t think, he’d kill her now but he doesn’t think, he leaps for Cal. He jumps off the roof and catches Cal in midair, holding him close. Lil Cal freaked him out, but he was the last thing of his brother he had left. He didn’t notice, he just ignored it till he hit the pavement. He had jumped off a three story building. The pavement felt cold and hard, he couldn’t move a finger. He struggles to breathe, then everything goes warm. His vision goes blurry, he’s pretty sure he either just pissed himself or is slowly bleeding to death. He worries it may even be both. Looking up he blacks out, the last thing he hears is the same voice, making that same laugh.
“hee hee….”
He is asleep, he believes he is, me thinks he might even be dead. He can’t tell. How is one supposed to know this isn’t what death is like? He wants to wake up, open his eyes. He tries to do so, and it is a rousing success.
He looks around slowly, his vision still slightly blurry. Monitors and machines, people in white. He wasn’t dead, it seems he is in a hospital room. He strains himself to sit up. He sees his cell phone on the desk he reaches for it, almost. Almost. Got it! He bites his lip at the pain, it hurts to move. Slumps down into the hospital bed and checks the time. As soon as he does he gets a message from John. The time reads 4:13 pm. Dave only half heartedly listens to John, he tries his best to sound cool.
“hee hee….”
He doesn’t look, he can’t stand her. Mr. Sandson enters the room and stares at Dave with extreme woe on his face. “Thank god you are alive..Dave..never do that again!” He sits beside Dave and wipes a tear from his eye, “Why on earth would you do that?!”
Dave doesn’t answer.
“I should’ve suspected something when you ran off to the park with your toy…and then in the middle of the night..jumping off the roof..Dave, please…” He mumbles through tears, “..Don’t ever do that again…”
“hee hee……” her voice changes slightly, its growing deeper, “Hee Hee…” That voice, no…it can’t be, “HEE HEE..HOO HOO HEE HEE.”
Dave looks at the ceiling and swears under his breath. “Dammit….god..fucking damn it…” He sighed and went back to sleep, hoping he wouldn’t wake up.
I did another one-shot fic.
Good lord this one is too long.
Ugh.
Laughter
Dave crawls out of his bed and grabs his shades. He can’t be seen without them, it’s his first order of business each day to don these bad boys. He hops out bed and gets dressed as per usual. He’s not narcissistic but he watches himself pose and flex in the mirror for a short time, he supposes it is ironic, but he’s just not really sure.
He would check pesterchum, but he knows the only person ever on this early is usually John. John gets up so early and it makes no sense, doesn’t he have better things to do than chat with friends? Dave ponders a moment and shakes his head, “Nope..There ain’t nothing more important than friends.” He mutters to himself as he enters the bathroom.
“Never drink a bottle of Apple Juice before bed and expect it to not want out in the morning…” Dave uses the restroom casually; he hums to himself on his new jams he made with some common supplies. He hears a subtle creak at the door.
“Someone’s in here!” he shouts.
“Hee hee….” The voice sounds feminine, that of a young girl.
Dave flushes a light red, “Listen babe, don’t go p-peeping on me. That’s sick.” He was embarrassed, a little mad, but embarrassed. He turns to the door only to find it is already closed. “Guess she’s a shy one….perverted, but shy…” He finishes his business and washes his hands. He leaves the bathroom and heads for the dining room.
Breakfast was set out on the table, Dave takes his seat and begins to chow down on the delicious bacon and eggs. He takes a few quick sips of his Orange Juice and goes back to his meal. After the events of Sburb he found himself alone in his home without his brother. Eventually rent could not be paid, and he was kicked out onto the streets. A little girl took him to the orphanage she lived at and they took him in post-haste. Dave doesn’t exactly enjoy being stuck in this place, but it’s a lot better than living off the street.
After finishing his breakfast he leaves the dishes where they are. Scoots out of his chair and then,
“…you should clean up after yourself…hee hee…” The feminine voice spoke again.
Dave turns to face her, he believes it is the girl who brought him here merely teasing him playfully. She has always been nice to him, and always very shy. Dave shook it off and laughed, he was kind of happy to have her do this. It reminded him of Bro in a way, except rather than fuck his shit up, she usually reminded him to do things he’d otherwise forget.
He goes to the living room and sits down on the couch. The other kids at the orphanage are watching a bland TV show for kids. The screen flashes vibrant colors as the crudely drawn characters run across a field of flowers and teach the children about letters and numbers. Dave is reminded of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, he misses drawing the comic to entertain his friends. The computer at the orphanage just wasn’t up to par with the one he had back at his old apartment.
Regardless, he sat down and decided to take a break and just lose himself in some mindless (?) television. The voice acting for the show was terrible to say the least, and the kids around him would not stop laughing. They would count along and Dave would die a little on the inside. He takes a breath in to start talking shit, only the words “Man this show is so fuc-“
“You shouldn’t swear…” It was the girl again, okay, she was beginning to get annoying today, “hee hee…”
Dave gets up and walks in the direction he heard her voice. He peeks around the door slowly, no sign of her. She’s a crafty little girl, shy, but crafty. Dave shouts aloud, “Hey Mr. Sandson! I am going outside!” He waited for an answer but knew he wouldn’t get one. Dave could just run away and that guy wouldn’t notice, but at the same time that man knew Dave, nor any of the kids, would run away. He even left the door unlocked at all times. Dave supposes it may be ironic, or just the owner of the orphanage mocking him and all the other children.
“So….yeah…bye.”
Dave exits the orphanage and walks casually down the street. He pulls out his cell phone from his pocket and holds it into the air, hoping to get some sign of a possible connection. He finds himself walking all the way to the park before he gets any decent bars. He decides to take this chance to go on pesterchum. By now Jade or Rose should be on too. As luck would have it, Jade is on.
Show pesterlog
- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:12 am –
TG: sup
GG: hi dave!!
TG: how are you doing
GG: pretty good! you?
TG: just fine
TG: that girls being weird again
GG: do you think she likes you?!
TG: fuck i hope not
TG: i like being single
GG: then let her down gently!
TG: how
GG: you’re really asking me for advice with women??
GG:
TG: oh yeah good point
TG: ill handle this shit myself
TG: got an idea
GG: goodbye and good luck!!!
TG: later
- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:20 am –
Dave puts his cell phone away and looks at the busy streets. It was rush hour now. Or rather, twenty minutes into it. He walks casually to the STOP sign and waits for a moment to cross the street. The cars rush by, blinkers flashing, music blaring, so much to take in it amazes Dave he has yet to spaz out from it.
In a faint whisper he hears her again, “…are you gonna do it…?” it giggled it usually laugh, “hee hee…”
“..fucking what…” Dave could turn to look at her, but his mind was set on the road. The cars whipping past him and the cold pavement beneath the hot rubber.
“..you never run away…hee hee….you just always contemplate…” she mocks him, she is mocking Dave.
“Listen babe, don’t try calling me out on this…I do it to be ironic…”
“…that’s your excuse for everything…”
Dave turns around and for the first time in months is face to face with her. Pale skin, eyes blue and as cold as a glacier. Her hair goes down to her shoulders, a blank smile is on her face. She is wearing a very simple dress with the word GAL on it, it makes her look immature and silly. Despite this her cheeks are a rosy red and she wears a lovely necklace. He stares at her blankly, Dave can’t confront her like this, those soulless eyes of hers simply unnerve him to no end.
He steps away from her, he has completely forgotten about the cars passing by. As luck would have it he snaps to as a loud horn honks at him, he turns to look, the headlights blind him as he jumps out of the way. Scraping his knee and breaking his shades. He looks around him, trying to hide his eyes as best he can. The girl is gone again, she always does this to him, but something about her was especially wrong today.
Dave sits in the park for what feels like an eternity until the moon comes up. The blisteringly hot sun has gone down, and with that brought forth the cooling timid Moon. Dave stands up and feels his muscles ache. He rushes back to the orphanage, he hopes he isn’t late for dinner.
Dave stumbles in, falling down again. He is simply far too sore to move easily. He crawls back up and keeps a palm pressed against the wall for support, trying to hide his eyes. Getting back to his room he reaches for his spare shades and slides them on.
“hee hee….”
Dave simply can not stand her anymore. She has been so disturbing today, she nearly had gotten him killed. He turns to face her and on a whim she kisses him on the lips and scurries off like a cockroach in daylight. He stands there dumbfounded for a while. “The hell…is her deal?”
He goes to the dining room, all the other kids are already finished eating. All of them but himself and that girl should be. He only sees one plate out, so she must’ve eaten quickly. He sits down and begins to eat in a chill manner, but she is getting to him. Her damn mind games.
Mr. Sandson walks up to Dave and places Lil Cal on the table. He grumbles, “You musn’t leave your toys out Dave.” He puts a stern look on his face. “I don’t want you playing in the street or leaving this alone on the sidewalk. it could’ve been stolen.” He huffs and walks away, “That being said…I am glad you are unharmed.”
Dave looks at Lil Cal, stares at him. Those eyes.
“hee hee…”
Dave turns around, he looks everywhere for her. She is always just out of view, but always in ear shot. Damn her. Dave takes Lil Cal and heads off to his room for bed. He has dealt with enough shit for the day.
His dream is horrible. He shakes and stirs in his sleep. Laughter, mockery and laughter is all he hears. Her voice is so soft and soothing, but its tone is as sharp and painful as a knife to the throat. He woke up and coughed and wheezed, he took in a deep breath just to make sure he was still alive.
He felt around his bed, he was sure he had left Lil Cal right beside him. He opens his eyes and turns on the lights in his room, Lil Cal is nowhere to be found.
“hee hee…”
Her. She must’ve taken Cal. She is causing too much trouble for Dave to take, he is fed up with this shit. He chases her down, her laughter gets louder and louder as he scampers up to the roof of the orphanage. He climbs the staircase, only getting minor glimpses of her. He finally gets to the rooftop and sees her holding Cal over the edge of the roof.
“Don’t you even dare.” He points a finger and glares at her coldly, he will not have this shit go down. Cal was the last thing he had of Bro’s, and he did not intend to lose it.
“hee hee….” Her grip on Cal loostens.
“Don’t…you fucking dare…” He steps closer to her, he grits his teeth. He is not kidding around.
“……” She stares at Dave and lets go of Cal. “..hee hee….”
Dave doesn’t think, he’d kill her now but he doesn’t think, he leaps for Cal. He jumps off the roof and catches Cal in midair, holding him close. Lil Cal freaked him out, but he was the last thing of his brother he had left. He didn’t notice, he just ignored it till he hit the pavement. He had jumped off a three story building. The pavement felt cold and hard, he couldn’t move a finger. He struggles to breathe, then everything goes warm. His vision goes blurry, he’s pretty sure he either just pissed himself or is slowly bleeding to death. He worries it may even be both. Looking up he blacks out, the last thing he hears is the same voice, making that same laugh.
“hee hee….”
He is asleep, he believes he is, me thinks he might even be dead. He can’t tell. How is one supposed to know this isn’t what death is like? He wants to wake up, open his eyes. He tries to do so, and it is a rousing success.
He looks around slowly, his vision still slightly blurry. Monitors and machines, people in white. He wasn’t dead, it seems he is in a hospital room. He strains himself to sit up. He sees his cell phone on the desk he reaches for it, almost. Almost. Got it! He bites his lip at the pain, it hurts to move. Slumps down into the hospital bed and checks the time. As soon as he does he gets a message from John. The time reads 4:13 pm. Dave only half heartedly listens to John, he tries his best to sound cool.
“hee hee….”
He doesn’t look, he can’t stand her. Mr. Sandson enters the room and stares at Dave with extreme woe on his face. “Thank god you are alive..Dave..never do that again!” He sits beside Dave and wipes a tear from his eye, “Why on earth would you do that?!”
Dave doesn’t answer.
“I should’ve suspected something when you ran off to the park with your toy…and then in the middle of the night..jumping off the roof..Dave, please…” He mumbles through tears, “..Don’t ever do that again…”
“hee hee……” her voice changes slightly, its growing deeper, “Hee Hee…” That voice, no…it can’t be, “HEE HEE..HOO HOO HEE HEE.”
Dave looks at the ceiling and swears under his breath. “Dammit….god..fucking damn it…” He sighed and went back to sleep, hoping he wouldn’t wake up.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH, Why would you torture Dave like that, GODDAMN YOU!!!
Seriously trough It rivaled wigmunds level of terrorcal, only more mindfuck. NEVER STOP
I did another one-shot fic.
Good lord this one is too long.
Ugh.
Laughter
Dave crawls out of his bed and grabs his shades. He can’t be seen without them, it’s his first order of business each day to don these bad boys. He hops out bed and gets dressed as per usual. He’s not narcissistic but he watches himself pose and flex in the mirror for a short time, he supposes it is ironic, but he’s just not really sure.
He would check pesterchum, but he knows the only person ever on this early is usually John. John gets up so early and it makes no sense, doesn’t he have better things to do than chat with friends? Dave ponders a moment and shakes his head, “Nope..There ain’t nothing more important than friends.” He mutters to himself as he enters the bathroom.
“Never drink a bottle of Apple Juice before bed and expect it to not want out in the morning…” Dave uses the restroom casually; he hums to himself on his new jams he made with some common supplies. He hears a subtle creak at the door.
“Someone’s in here!” he shouts.
“Hee hee….” The voice sounds feminine, that of a young girl.
Dave flushes a light red, “Listen babe, don’t go p-peeping on me. That’s sick.” He was embarrassed, a little mad, but embarrassed. He turns to the door only to find it is already closed. “Guess she’s a shy one….perverted, but shy…” He finishes his business and washes his hands. He leaves the bathroom and heads for the dining room.
Breakfast was set out on the table, Dave takes his seat and begins to chow down on the delicious bacon and eggs. He takes a few quick sips of his Orange Juice and goes back to his meal. After the events of Sburb he found himself alone in his home without his brother. Eventually rent could not be paid, and he was kicked out onto the streets. A little girl took him to the orphanage she lived at and they took him in post-haste. Dave doesn’t exactly enjoy being stuck in this place, but it’s a lot better than living off the street.
After finishing his breakfast he leaves the dishes where they are. Scoots out of his chair and then,
“…you should clean up after yourself…hee hee…” The feminine voice spoke again.
Dave turns to face her, he believes it is the girl who brought him here merely teasing him playfully. She has always been nice to him, and always very shy. Dave shook it off and laughed, he was kind of happy to have her do this. It reminded him of Bro in a way, except rather than fuck his shit up, she usually reminded him to do things he’d otherwise forget.
He goes to the living room and sits down on the couch. The other kids at the orphanage are watching a bland TV show for kids. The screen flashes vibrant colors as the crudely drawn characters run across a field of flowers and teach the children about letters and numbers. Dave is reminded of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff, he misses drawing the comic to entertain his friends. The computer at the orphanage just wasn’t up to par with the one he had back at his old apartment.
Regardless, he sat down and decided to take a break and just lose himself in some mindless (?) television. The voice acting for the show was terrible to say the least, and the kids around him would not stop laughing. They would count along and Dave would die a little on the inside. He takes a breath in to start talking shit, only the words “Man this show is so fuc-“
“You shouldn’t swear…” It was the girl again, okay, she was beginning to get annoying today, “hee hee…”
Dave gets up and walks in the direction he heard her voice. He peeks around the door slowly, no sign of her. She’s a crafty little girl, shy, but crafty. Dave shouts aloud, “Hey Mr. Sandson! I am going outside!” He waited for an answer but knew he wouldn’t get one. Dave could just run away and that guy wouldn’t notice, but at the same time that man knew Dave, nor any of the kids, would run away. He even left the door unlocked at all times. Dave supposes it may be ironic, or just the owner of the orphanage mocking him and all the other children.
“So….yeah…bye.”
Dave exits the orphanage and walks casually down the street. He pulls out his cell phone from his pocket and holds it into the air, hoping to get some sign of a possible connection. He finds himself walking all the way to the park before he gets any decent bars. He decides to take this chance to go on pesterchum. By now Jade or Rose should be on too. As luck would have it, Jade is on.
Show pesterlog
- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:12 am –
TG: sup
GG: hi dave!!
TG: how are you doing
GG: pretty good! you?
TG: just fine
TG: that girls being weird again
GG: do you think she likes you?!
TG: fuck i hope not
TG: i like being single
GG: then let her down gently!
TG: how
GG: you’re really asking me for advice with women??
GG:
TG: oh yeah good point
TG: ill handle this shit myself
TG: got an idea
GG: goodbye and good luck!!!
TG: later
- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering gardenGnostic [GG] at 6:20 am –
Dave puts his cell phone away and looks at the busy streets. It was rush hour now. Or rather, twenty minutes into it. He walks casually to the STOP sign and waits for a moment to cross the street. The cars rush by, blinkers flashing, music blaring, so much to take in it amazes Dave he has yet to spaz out from it.
In a faint whisper he hears her again, “…are you gonna do it…?” it giggled it usually laugh, “hee hee…”
“..fucking what…” Dave could turn to look at her, but his mind was set on the road. The cars whipping past him and the cold pavement beneath the hot rubber.
“..you never run away…hee hee….you just always contemplate…” she mocks him, she is mocking Dave.
“Listen babe, don’t try calling me out on this…I do it to be ironic…”
“…that’s your excuse for everything…”
Dave turns around and for the first time in months is face to face with her. Pale skin, eyes blue and as cold as a glacier. Her hair goes down to her shoulders, a blank smile is on her face. She is wearing a very simple dress with the word GAL on it, it makes her look immature and silly. Despite this her cheeks are a rosy red and she wears a lovely necklace. He stares at her blankly, Dave can’t confront her like this, those soulless eyes of hers simply unnerve him to no end.
He steps away from her, he has completely forgotten about the cars passing by. As luck would have it he snaps to as a loud horn honks at him, he turns to look, the headlights blind him as he jumps out of the way. Scraping his knee and breaking his shades. He looks around him, trying to hide his eyes as best he can. The girl is gone again, she always does this to him, but something about her was especially wrong today.
Dave sits in the park for what feels like an eternity until the moon comes up. The blisteringly hot sun has gone down, and with that brought forth the cooling timid Moon. Dave stands up and feels his muscles ache. He rushes back to the orphanage, he hopes he isn’t late for dinner.
Dave stumbles in, falling down again. He is simply far too sore to move easily. He crawls back up and keeps a palm pressed against the wall for support, trying to hide his eyes. Getting back to his room he reaches for his spare shades and slides them on.
“hee hee….”
Dave simply can not stand her anymore. She has been so disturbing today, she nearly had gotten him killed. He turns to face her and on a whim she kisses him on the lips and scurries off like a cockroach in daylight. He stands there dumbfounded for a while. “The hell…is her deal?”
He goes to the dining room, all the other kids are already finished eating. All of them but himself and that girl should be. He only sees one plate out, so she must’ve eaten quickly. He sits down and begins to eat in a chill manner, but she is getting to him. Her damn mind games.
Mr. Sandson walks up to Dave and places Lil Cal on the table. He grumbles, “You musn’t leave your toys out Dave.” He puts a stern look on his face. “I don’t want you playing in the street or leaving this alone on the sidewalk. it could’ve been stolen.” He huffs and walks away, “That being said…I am glad you are unharmed.”
Dave looks at Lil Cal, stares at him. Those eyes.
“hee hee…”
Dave turns around, he looks everywhere for her. She is always just out of view, but always in ear shot. Damn her. Dave takes Lil Cal and heads off to his room for bed. He has dealt with enough shit for the day.
His dream is horrible. He shakes and stirs in his sleep. Laughter, mockery and laughter is all he hears. Her voice is so soft and soothing, but its tone is as sharp and painful as a knife to the throat. He woke up and coughed and wheezed, he took in a deep breath just to make sure he was still alive.
He felt around his bed, he was sure he had left Lil Cal right beside him. He opens his eyes and turns on the lights in his room, Lil Cal is nowhere to be found.
“hee hee…”
Her. She must’ve taken Cal. She is causing too much trouble for Dave to take, he is fed up with this shit. He chases her down, her laughter gets louder and louder as he scampers up to the roof of the orphanage. He climbs the staircase, only getting minor glimpses of her. He finally gets to the rooftop and sees her holding Cal over the edge of the roof.
“Don’t you even dare.” He points a finger and glares at her coldly, he will not have this shit go down. Cal was the last thing he had of Bro’s, and he did not intend to lose it.
“hee hee….” Her grip on Cal loostens.
“Don’t…you fucking dare…” He steps closer to her, he grits his teeth. He is not kidding around.
“……” She stares at Dave and lets go of Cal. “..hee hee….”
Dave doesn’t think, he’d kill her now but he doesn’t think, he leaps for Cal. He jumps off the roof and catches Cal in midair, holding him close. Lil Cal freaked him out, but he was the last thing of his brother he had left. He didn’t notice, he just ignored it till he hit the pavement. He had jumped off a three story building. The pavement felt cold and hard, he couldn’t move a finger. He struggles to breathe, then everything goes warm. His vision goes blurry, he’s pretty sure he either just pissed himself or is slowly bleeding to death. He worries it may even be both. Looking up he blacks out, the last thing he hears is the same voice, making that same laugh.
“hee hee….”
He is asleep, he believes he is, me thinks he might even be dead. He can’t tell. How is one supposed to know this isn’t what death is like? He wants to wake up, open his eyes. He tries to do so, and it is a rousing success.
He looks around slowly, his vision still slightly blurry. Monitors and machines, people in white. He wasn’t dead, it seems he is in a hospital room. He strains himself to sit up. He sees his cell phone on the desk he reaches for it, almost. Almost. Got it! He bites his lip at the pain, it hurts to move. Slumps down into the hospital bed and checks the time. As soon as he does he gets a message from John. The time reads 4:13 pm. Dave only half heartedly listens to John, he tries his best to sound cool.
“hee hee….”
He doesn’t look, he can’t stand her. Mr. Sandson enters the room and stares at Dave with extreme woe on his face. “Thank god you are alive..Dave..never do that again!” He sits beside Dave and wipes a tear from his eye, “Why on earth would you do that?!”
Dave doesn’t answer.
“I should’ve suspected something when you ran off to the park with your toy…and then in the middle of the night..jumping off the roof..Dave, please…” He mumbles through tears, “..Don’t ever do that again…”
“hee hee……” her voice changes slightly, its growing deeper, “Hee Hee…” That voice, no…it can’t be, “HEE HEE..HOO HOO HEE HEE.”
Dave looks at the ceiling and swears under his breath. “Dammit….god..fucking damn it…” He sighed and went back to sleep, hoping he wouldn’t wake up.
She watched him sleep. Well, watched wasn’t quite the right term. Really, she was just smelling, and licking her screen every once in a while to get the details. For the purposes of convenience, though, she watched him sleep.
Normally she fast forwarded through things like sleeping, but she couldn’t bear to do it this time. He was doomed, after all.
Normally she didn’t follow the doomed ones. It was depressing enough already, after all. Why bother to torture yourself with something that you couldn’t stop? It was easier to think of them as extra, not real.
She followed him, though.
It was her fault. She’d been the one to doom him. She’d split the timeline on purpose, and doomed him, and for what? To prove a point?
He trusted her, you know. This alien boy sleeping peacefully there trusted her. That’s what made it hurt so much, he trusted her completely and she doomed him.
Oh god, there wasn’t much time left. She should plug her nose, she should change the view, she should fast forward, she should run away from the consequences.
She wasn’t going to, though. It was her fault.
He woke up.
----
-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] --
TG: well that was apparently pointless
TG: now what
TG: hello
TG: terezi
TG: whats up
GC: >:[
-----
He didn’t know. He didn’t know. He was already dead and he didn’t know it and he TRUSTED her and it was happening, she was out of time and the demon was there and-
She licked the screen as his head fell to the ground, the shades falling off on the second bounce. His body swayed for a moment or two, then crashed down, a symphony of candy coated sour apples on a plate of candy red. In any other context, it would have been delicious.
His eyes were open.
She wished she could close them.
She rewound the viewscreen, and she watched him sleep.
A Storybook Story
Part 8 (Previous chapters linked in my signature below)
Inside the castle's chapel, Butterjade and Striderdink kneel before the most impressive looking clergyman imaginable. Behind them sit the old King and Queen. Except for them, a handmaiden, Count Eridan and several guards the place is empty.
The clergyman cleared his throat and looked down upon the bride and groom.
"MaRrIaGe...MoThErFuCkInG mArRiAgE iS wHaT bRiNgS tHeSe FuCkErS tOgEtHeR tOdAy..."
The clown-faced clergyman flipped a page and quietly honked.
"MaRrIaGe, ThAt FuCkInG mIrAcLe, ThAt DrEaM wItHiN a FuCkInG dReAm..."
Outside a commotion erupted, barely audible within the chapel. The guards looked at each other nervously as they listened.
"DD: < Don't run! Don't run!"
Outside, Neppin and the brutes gathered at the front gate are frightened out of their minds. The only thing Neppin could say was an order for nobody to run. But she wanted to do so as well.
"DD: < Don't run!"
In front of the terrified group, something horrible loomed. A terrifying beast clad in a great black cloak, bearing a mighty horn rack and wielding a pair of black pails bearing skulls upon their surface...they appeared to be filled with blood.
"I AM THE DREAD PIRATE VANTAS!
THERE, uh, WILL BE NO SURVIVORS!"
The thing floated towards the guards. This was due to the wheelbarrow Tavrik was standing in being pushed by John who also had Kartley draped over his shoulders.
"Now?"
"No."
The brutes cowered as the thing floated closer to them.
"I HAVE ARRIVED TO REAP WHAT I HAVE COME TO CLAIM!
SOON YOU WILL ALL FALL BEFORE ME!"
Neppin, in a panic, kept on ordering the Brutes to stay.
"Now?"
"Now."
As one, the brutes scream in terror as the giant burst into flames and kept moving towards them.
"THE DREAD PIRATE VANTAS, um, TAKES NO SURVIVORS!
BEHOLD ALL OF YOUR WORST NIGHTMARES!"
Back in the chapel, the clergyman oblivious to the racket outside. Kept on rambling.
"...NoW mY fUcKiNg BrOs, WhEn YoU hAvE lOvE, fUcKiNg TrUe LoVe, It WiLl FoLlOw YoU fUcKiNg FoReVeR..."
Prince Striderdink, however, heard the racket, turned to Eridan and gave him a sharp nod. Count Eridan and the four guards immediately left the chapel.
Outside...
"THE DREAD PIRATE VANTAS HAS COME FOR YOUR SOULS!"
As he uttered this proclamation, Tavrik raised the buckets towards the brutes and dumped their contents - red paint and some giblets stolen from a butcher - onto the ground.
The brutes took this time as an opportunity to flee for their lives and souls, but they left poor Neppin alone.
"...So TrEaSuRe ThIs MiRaClE cAlLeD lOvE..."
"Let's fast forward this a bit, shall we?"
"YoU fUcKiNg HaVe ThAt RiNg?"
Striderdink whipped out the ring, but the screams outside have become quite noticeable. Butterjade smiled and stared at the Prince.
"He comes for me."
Back outside, Neppin started to lower the portcullis, but she could only watch in fear as Tavrik walked forward and torn it from the wall.
Inside, Striderdink shoved the rings on the Princess's finger and gave her an evil glare.
"That piece of shit is dead."
Butterjade just smiled at him.
"I killed him myself."
"If that is true, then why are you so terrified right now?"
Neppin was frozen as she watched the three big damned heroes walk up to her.
"Give us the damn key."
"(:33 < *The Ch33f Enfurcer has no idea what the ruffians want as she most certainly does not have a gate key. She-"
"Tavrik, tear off her tail."
"800 < Oh, this key."
"...So My BiTcH, PrInCeSs BuTtErJaDe..."
"Just say 'man and wife' you drugged out idiot."
"MaN aNd FuCkInG wIfE."
With that, Striderdink stood up and pointed at the handmaiden.
"You. Escort the bride to the Honeymoon Suite. I shall be there soon."
He ran off and left Butterjade standing there in a tearful daze.
"He didn't come..."
The castle was in a panic. Guards were everywhere. Down one of the halls, Count Eridan and the four guards stop as they run across Kartley, John and Tavrik coming towards them.
Well, John and Tavrik coming towards them while dragging Kartley between them.
Count Eridan points at the group.
"Kill the man in fuckin black and that stupid giant, but leavve the third for questionin."
The four guards charge forward only to be horrifically slaughtered by a furious John. The last one was dead before the first had a chance to slump to the ground. After a slight pause, John looked up at the Count and smiled.
"Hell. My name is John Egberto.
You killed my love. Prepare to die."
Eridan stood their for a moment, wand in hand, staring at the duelist. Then he turned and ran for his life.
John ran after him. But just before John reached him, Eridan slammed shut a heavy wooden door and locked it. John threw himself against it. It stood strong.
"Tavrik! I need you!"
Tavrik looked down the hall in frustration. He couldn't just leave Kartley alone.
"GOD FUCKING DAMMIT! HE'S GETTING AWAY!"
Tavrik sighed and then propped his limped friend up against a suit of armor.
"uh...I guess that I'll be right back."
Tavrik then found John and battered the door down.
"Thanks"
John flew through the doorway as Tavrik went back to retrieve Kartley.
Down one of the other hallways, Butterjade and the handmaiden head towards the Honeymoon Suite.
"Well, That Was Certainly A Strange Wedding."
The Princess just walked along in a daze.
"[color="008141]And Now There Is This Commotion. How Distasteful.[/color]"
Butterjade then stopped and turned to hug the handmaiden. She was taken aback by this.
"And What Was The Purpose For That?"
"Because you've always been kind to me Kanaya.
And once we reach the Suite, I'll never see you again."
Kanaya just patted Butterjade's hand and they kept on walking down the halls.
Deep in the castle, Count Eridan bolted down the corriders, all the time only to look behind himself and see John bearing down upon him.
Tavrik managed to get back to where he left Kartley...only to find that no one was there. Needless to say he was terribly confused.
Count Eridan found himself in the dining hall, knowing that John was just behind him, he readied his wand and waited.
John burst in only to find Eridan waiting to blast him with the wand that slew his love.
John tried to dodge, but he couldn't get out of the way in time. He took the blast to his gut. He collapsed to the ground and stared at the ceiling in pain.
"I'm sorry...I'm sorry Rose...I tried...I..."
Eridan walks across the room to survey his latest victim. He looks down upon John's face and remembers...
"You're that fuckin asshole I had to put dowwn years ago.
Wwhat a damned joke. You'vve wwasted these years tracking me dowwn only to fail wwith me just wwithin your grasp.
Howw fuckin marvvelous."
Butterjade finally reached her Suite. When she got inside, she crossed the room and removed a dagger from her desk. She is peaceful as she pressed the blade against her chest.
"Such a fucking shame to damage such a perfect chest."
Butterjade spun around to see Kartley in her bed. He lay there unmoving as she ran up and propped him up for a passionate kiss.
"Kartley, darling. Why don't you hold me?"
"Careful."
"We finally are together again and all you can say is 'careful'?"
"Careful!"
She let him go, thumping his head against the bed's headboard.
Meanwhile in the dining hall, Count Eridan watched in surprise as John brought himself to his feet.
"You just don't knoww wwhen to quit do you?
You'vve got an ovverdevveloped sense of vvengeance.
At some point, it's going to get you into some fuckin trouble."
Eridan crafted a blade of energy with his wand and strode forward. He dashed forward to stab John in his heart only to be surprised by John deflecting the blow so that it sank into his left shoulder.
Eridan stepped back and tried again to stab John, only to have his jab once again deflected. But this time the blade went into John's right shoulder.
Eridan then jumped back in surprise as John managed to swing his hammer, just barely missing the Count.
John pushed himself forward and raised his hammer towards Eridan.
"Hello. My name is John Egberto,
you killed my love, prepare to die."
Eridan launches a brutal attack against John only to driven back.
"Hello. My name is John Egberto,
you killed my love, prepare to die."
And with this, John charged forward, sending blow after blow against the Count who, just as John had, deflected all of the incoming blows.
"Hello. My name is John Egberto.
You killed my love. Prepare to die."
"Stop fuckin saying that!"
John follows the retreating Count, backing him up against the dinner table. He then smashes both of the Count's shoulders.
"HELLO! MY NAME IS JOHN EGBERTO.
YOU KILLED MY LOVE. PREPARE TO DIE."
"Fuck..."
John pressed the head of his hammer against Eridan's chin.
"Offer me money..."
"Yes"
John leans forward, pressing the now kneeling Eridan's neck against the table's edge, nearly choking him.
"Power too. Promise me that."
"Yes! Yes! Wwhatever you wwant!"
"Whatever I want?"
"YES!"
John reared his hammer back, pure righteous rage in his eyes.
"GIVE ME BACK MY LOVE! YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"
And with that, John swung the hammer.
And removed Eridan's head cleanly from his shoulders.
John looked down upon the body of the man who slew his true love. He smiles...and then collapses.
Back at Butterjade's suite, the Princess is in a panic as she cries over the fact that she is now married to Striderdink.
"Well...did you say 'I do'?"
"What? Well...
No...No I didn't"
"Then you're not married.
Isn't that right Striderdink?"
Striderdink paused as he is addressed when he walked into the room. He then smiled and pulled his sword.
"It's only a small technicality.
But first. To the death."
"No.
To the pain."
"What the hell is that?"
"Well then, I guess I'll have to explain it to you.
Don't worry, I'll speak slowly and with small words so you can follow me you smug piece of shit."
"That very well may be the first time I've been insulted directly."
"Get used to it, it won't be the last time.
Now, to the pain means this: first, I'm going to cut off your feet at the ankles.
Then, I'll take your hands, at the wrists.
Next, your nose."
Striderdink sighed.
"Then I suppose you'll take my tongue.
You know, I killed you too quickly last time.
I'm going pace myself and enjoy it so I don't repeat that mistake."
"I'm not finished.
Next thing I'll take is your shades.
A small insult, but all the better once I remove your eyelids."
Striderdink took a step towards the two lovers upon the bed.
"Then my ears. I'm fucking ready to get this all over with."
"Wrong! Do you know why?"
Striderdink stopped...the fear he felt back in the chapel has returned.
"It's so that every shriek and look of terror by every child who sees your tattered form will be yours to cherish.
Every baby that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, "My Gog, what is that abomination?" will be yours to see and forever hear."
Kartley then smiled at the obviously frightened Striderdink.
"That's what "to the pain" means.
It means I will leave you in the most exquisite form of pain imaginable for the rest of your days."
"You're a terrible bluff."
"Yes, that is possible you swine. I might be bluffing."
Kartley then slowly, painfully started to move.
"It's perfectly reasonable, you sack of grub leavings, that I was only laying down because I lacked the strength to do anything after you left me for dead."
Kartley's feet reached the floor and he pulled himself up.
"Then again, I might have the strength after all."
Striderdink could only stare in horror as he dropped his blade and found himself tumbling into a seat he backed into.
"Thank you, I was going to ask you to take a seat anyways.
Butterjade, tie him up. Make it tight."
It was then that John, battered and bloodied limped into the room.
"Have you seen Tavrik?"
"I thought he was with you."
"No."
"Well...shit..."
Kartley panicked as he slowly started to fall forward. Butterjade rushed forward and propped him up.
"You can't stand?"
"Ha! I knew it!"
John glared at Striderdink and then turned to Kartley.
"You want me to kill him for you?"
"No, he must live.
I want him to enjoy his long and lonely life with no one except for his cowardice."
From outside, the three heard someone calling out for John.
"uh...John! John, where, um are you?"
Kartley, Butterjade and John walked out onto the balcony and looked down to find Tavrik leading four beautiful hoofbeasts. The giant looked up and saw his friend looking down upon him.
"uh, I found these beasts, John. In the Prince's stables.
I thought that since there are four of us if we find our friend and his love that we could use them...
Oh hey there lad."
"You did finally did something right, Tavrik."
Tavrik smiled up at them.
"Don't worry, I won't let it, uh, go to my head.
Oh hey!"
Tavrik exclaimed in surprise as Butterjade leapt off the balcony into his arms.
John and Kartley watched this before turning to each other.
"You know, now that I've finally gotten my revenge.
I have no idea what I'm going to do next."
Kartley smiled at him as he was readied to be lobbed at Tavrik.
"Well, I think you'd make an incredible Dread Pirate..."
And with that, the four rode off into the night.
.
A/N:
Welp, I'm almost done. The only thing left is the epilogue.
I hope you are all satisified with Gamzee's role. I figured the clergyman was a far better role than Miracle Max who was actually coherent as opposed to the spacey priest.
I know in that in the movie, Buttercup is escorted to her room by the old king and queen. But I felt that I need to show Kanaya somewhere, even if it was a tiny role. Because with that, I featured all of the kids and trolls as I rewrote this long tale.
Damn you, Wigmund, I've seen the movie again and now I can't see the eel scene without think at the screaming Fefs and laughing. And probably I never will.
In my mind, she's watched him die at least 5 times by that point. She's got a twisted sense of obligation to him and is trying to punish herself and etch it into her mind.
Dammit Katrika, I can just imagine Terezi sitting there watching Dave die over and over again as punishment. Trying to numb the horrific pain in her heart as she watches him bleed out. It's when Karkat comes close and tries to figure out what's wrong with her (since, despite his assholey ways, he cares about his friends and is concerned about them), she breaks down and runs off to sob in front of the chalk mural of Dave and herself together.
Here's a link to another Troll!Cops story I wrote: The Raid.
Karkat and gang break into the city's military base and run into an interesting character while there.
Katrika
You need to stop writing sadfic
I have spent $400 dollars on horns in a week alone
Originally Posted by HarMegidon
I just am asking why she is selling sausages at a funeral.
Originally Posted by inexpediency
Everyone is a hedgehog...on the inside.
Originally Posted by Tesseract
On a deadness scale of normal to doorknob I would rate her as double doorknob
Originally Posted by Jitka
fuck yeah sodium hexametaphosphate
that is my favorite hexametaphosphate
Malakin:because its actually the truman show just with ponys
crash826:that
crash826:makes
crash826:far too much sense
gingerale:xD
Malakin:think about it
Malakin:it all makes sense
Originally Posted by Catbread
Those sound like some pretty badass park rangers.
Originally Posted by ranasan
Wow... it's like if someone managed to manifest Missingno. from Pokemon Red and Blue into the real world, grind it up into a fine powder and then snort it.
18:21 Girard so I learned something at the barber:
18:22 Daniel ?
18:22 Girard The entirety of England, London in particular, is actually a stage for the biggest production of the musical Oliver ever made.
18:22 Girard England is a giant musical.
18:22 Girard This explains the small children with cockney accents and giant hats who dance in the streets.
18:23 Daniel ...DAMN YOU MARY POPPINS!
18:23 Daniel DAMN YOU TO HELL!
The first living thing to set foot on Renaissance was named Rosaline Mary Lalonde. The second sentient thing to touch Renaissian soil used to be called Jack Noir.
Rose set the skull on the ground and got back on the tin thing they called a spacecraft. At least it was airtight, and fireproof.
Inside the skull a tiny red light flashed. The skul began to rise up, propelled on a stream of fire from the explosion.
There were a few tense seconds. No one, not even Gamzee, dared to breathe.
The skull landed softly in the dirt. Too softly.
Kanaya stepped forward.
"That was attempt number 25 to destroy that thing. It's not dying." She shuddered. Her eyes grew watery and greenish.
"Someone is going to have to watch it for the rest of their lives. Since I'm the only one here without... Anyone." She gasped another breath and spread her arms, "I'll do it."
"Kanaya..."
"No, Nepeta. You at least have Equius dependant on you. I'll watch the skull."
"I'll do it!" Said Vriska loudly.
"NO. WE AREN'T GOING TO LET YOU HOLD THE DAMN SKULL."
"I can do it!"
"No." Everyone started. It was Gamzee. For the first time since the battle with Jack, Gamzees eyes burned with the mythical Jesterfire. "Vriska, stay out of this shit. You had your time in the spot."
Vriska looked murderous. "Are you idiots really going to listen to Gam-"
"Yes," they all said in unison. Vrisk deflated somewhat, although Vriska never managed to sink to the level of normal people.
"Vriska..." John said, and he put a hand on her shoulder. She shrugged him off and stomped off to her room.
"This isn't the end of this."
A/N
You know, the minute I start writing something and finally getting some Flow, my dad decides this is the time he's going to completely not understand what he's talking about.
He thinks this is a chat.
Like I can type GTG DAD IS ASHAT in the middle of my story and you'll all be LOL KK BY D00D.
HOLY HELL YOU GUYS I am the slowest writer, it is me. Sorry this took so long.
Flip it Four Ways
Violet
He felt blind.
Even behind his glasses the light was such that his eyes stung and watered. He raised a hand to shade his eyes and searched, desperately, for some sort of shade. There was none to be found – it was so bright that he didn't even cast a shadow.
The heat, too, was intense; a desert's glare. High above Skaia was less a symbol of their goal than a baleful eye, searing all it touched.
The ground was sandy, some sort of pale crystal that shifted underneath his feet. The crystals, too, shone with a searing light – light above, light below.
Above all, it was silent. Eerily silent. He was so used to the constant ticking of LOHAC that the idea of silence was almost terrifying. Dave Egbert's LOHAW had been filled with constant whistling; Hellmurder Island had teemed with birds with the sound of the sea all around. Here?
Nothing. Even the shifting of the sand made no sound at all. There was only the heat, and the light.
Time had been recently an almost tangible thing to Dave, something he could sense and pull at, a rhythm. This had overridden his once utter lack of patience. Before, he'd fidgeted, he'd tapped his feet while sitting, he'd taken on more projects and hobbies than it was actually possible to keep up with in an effort to fill the passing of the hours. He'd since learned a little patience, subjecting himself to the flow and having a little patience.
But again, the lack of sound here meant that the hours seemed to pass with uncharacteristic slowness. No amount of fiddling with the timetables shook the feeling, and so it seemed like an eternity had passed when he stumbled upon the palace.
Literally. He was so glad that Terezi couldn't see him like this, she'd be laughing her ass off. He slowly felt around the base of the thing. Why couldn't he see it? Damn thing was right there, even if it was made of glowy shit it shouldn't be invisible.
His blind flailing found him a step, which he felt along, whacking it with his hands until he was sure it was there. The ascent was a shuddering, halting affair, each step an attempt to make certain it was really there.
This is stupid. What am I even looking for anyway?
After all, the last two Daves hadn't been very helpful. The first it turned out hadn't been able to use the Quest Bed either; the second had been out of his mind. And this one? Who even knew.
I should turn back.
He kept climbing. As he ascended, it actually grew darker, and he could see faint outlines of the building he stood on. He caught reflections of himself occasionally in its surface, until finally he could see himself beneath his feet.
There's one way to find the path.
This took him inside, where he was suddenly faced with a thousand reflections of himself – not time duplicates, but mirrors. Red and black Daves looked at him from every angle (and he was very glad, suddenly, that he hadn't changed into his Felt suit).
It was still bright inside – the glass was luminescent, like everything else on this planet – but it was at least a little darker than it was outside. He stepped forward through a patch of brighter light.
And immediately jumped back. He was lucky that his hand had hit it first – he sported a bright red sunburn across the back of his hand.
Heat and light. Gog damn Strider, you're an idiot.
He looked around the temple now with new eyes. There were numerous patches of white hot light, focused through lenses and reflected by the mirrors.
Jegus fuck, why are these places always crazy videogame deathtraps?
Maybe because this is a crazy videogame.
Stop talking to yourself.
He came to a hall of mirrors.
Here, the light had dimmed to something that seemed almost cool and dark, save for the few lances of white-hot light that pierced the darkness. Otherwise, everything was a pale violet. Strangely, the heat was more intense here.
Ultraviolet light, he mused. Darker it goes the hotter it gets. Just 'cause you can't see it doesn't mean it can't kill you.
Still, despite the dimness, the figure in the center of the hall stood out like a tarantula on a wedding cake. It was dressed all in black, its face obscured by a dark hood.
The figure stood slowly, drawing its sword - a piece that had even more of the tarantula-on-wedding-cake look than the figure itself. The blade didn't seem to be there: it was composed of a series of squares that seemed to shift along its length when it moved, but more than that it was black to the point that it looked like a scar on the world, a series of dead pixels on a screen.
“Stay where you are.
Dave stopped in mid step.
“What? Why?”
“I merely ask that you hold still.”
It was so fast Dave couldn't even see it. He could feel it though, a tug on Time's fabric, a skip in the beat – Lalonde was moving at the speed of light.
Quicker than thought he whipped out his timetables – no scratching back, that'd create a splinter timeline. He had just enough time to try something completely different.
The left disk, red, he spun back and forth, mentally making adjustments before spinning it as fast as he could. The right, violet, he slowed to almost stopping. He could feel the time-tables rattle with the effort of him bending them to a purpose they weren't quite ready to take on, feel them resisting his sudden improvisation. Gears ground and shuddered, and as he he turned to face the other boy he could see Lalonde flicker and turn nearly transparent as he slowed down, the actual light radiating from him slowing as it met Strider's eyes.
Lalonde was reaching one hand for his shirt, the other white-knuckled around that black blade. He was not okay with this. What the hell was the other Dave doing? He took a step backwards.
And into open air.
He couldn't even scream. He fell ten feet before hitting something hard and tumbling heels over head down a steep, curving incline. The timetables clattered the ground just after, one of them coming to rest far above and the other bouncing down behind him.
It wasn't there before it wasn't there what the fuck what the fuck...
He flailed out his arms and scrabbled, trying to stop himself, but all he did was push himself towards the edge... and fall off of it.
Open air.
Darkness.
He couldn't even scream. He couldn't scratch back to save himself; the timetables were lost somewhere in the abyss and it just
kept
getting
darker
time
s t r e t c h e d
D I A L A T E D
s
l
o
w
e
d
.
.
.
stopped?
ƃuıpuəun pəuƃıəɹ ssəuʞɹɐp əɥʇ llıʇs puɐ
someone wake me up
please god someone wake me up
bro
bro
bro where the hell are you
davesprite
somebody for the love of god
terezi
jade
no no no stupidest way to go out ever fuck fuck let me out
please just
no i dont want to be the doomed one
please
And then a hand closed around his arm.
“Do you want to live?”
“What kind of completely fucking stupid question is that!? YES, damn you, yes!”
“Oh good.”
Something warm and faintly violet wrapped around him, and he could feel Time compressing, slipping towards a singularity as their motion through space as everything, everything turned that same violent violet.
It was over in an eternity and an instant. He lay perfectly still, something heavy sitting on top of him, and he took in the fact that everything was full of light. God. He'd never noticed how lovely light was before. Man, what was this heavy warm thing on top of him? That was nice too. Actually yeah let's just. Lay here. Like a coolkid. This is cool, and what just happened was totally fine.
Man what is that warm heavy thing.
“... get off.”
“My apologies.”
The warm weight lifted.
“It's simply that you seemed so comfortable like th-”
“Please shut up.”
He lay there for a few long moments, trying to put himself back together. He was fine, really. Just fine. Long descents into an unknowable abyss with the threat of imminent death were totally not a problem at all.
Totally.
He was just lying here because.
Yes.
“Where are my glasses.”
“I have them. But, really, what's a little knowledge of unusual eye colors between alternate universe selves? Mine are violet, if you were wondering.”
“I wasn't.”
Totally fine.
He pushed himself up to a sitting position and put his palms on the ground at last.
“And the timetables?”
His counterpart sat a few feet away, also cross-legged. His hood was finally down, and, Strider could see, his eyes were indeed lavender. He had a pair of glasses in one hand, but his main digital communication device seemed to be a pair of headphones with a green visor. Something like Rose's headband thing, but with a bit more of a Dave-ish flair.
“Caught those as well.”
Lalonde retrieved them from his fetch modus (Hashmap as well, Strider noted) and lay them on the ground in front of him, along with the iShades.
“Which leaves just one more question.”
“What's that?”
“What the fuck were you doing back there?”
Lalonde gave a thin smile. “David, you silly thing,” he said. “I was merely attempting to warn you about the stairs.”
Strider stared for a moment in blank disbelief, then started laughing. He rolled back over onto his back and laughed so hard he nearly convulsed.
“Warned me, oh kicking christ, warned me about the stairs, you were trying to tell me dawg...”
He laughed until he couldn't any more. Lalonde simply tilted his head slightly, his gaze distant but calculating. After a while, silence descended on them and stretched into a middle distance. Lalonde shifted slightly. Strider rotated his shoulders.
“So - ”
“Well...”
Another long pause.
“I believe you have the right of way here, David.”
“Dude, the name's Dave. Not David. Dave.”
Lalonde raised an eyebrow. “Merely 'Dave'? My goodness, Mr. Strider is even less creative than I thought. An expression of your flawed perception of irony, perhaps?”
“Jegus, 'Mr. Strider?' Are you fucking kidding me? You make him sound like some dude in tweed and a bow tie, and lemmie tell ya, Bro would only ever wear that shit ironically.”
Again, that thin smile. “For some definitions of 'irony', of course.”
“Oh man, spare me the grammar lesson, okay? Okay.”
The silence fell again between them, and stretched on. Lalonde shifted in his black armor, pulling a little at his collar. Strider wondered how the guy wore that thing in this heat. It was bad enough in a tux; six pounds of chainmail must have been stifling.
“Nice duds.”
“Do you really think so, or is that yet more of your peculiar idea of irony?”
“Nah, that's honesty. Seriously. You look the part. Just like Rose's got the mumbo jumbo crazy girl thing down, you got the crazy Monty Python knight templar thing down.”
“Thank you, I suppose? I made it myself. Well, rather, there's alchemization involved, but it came from a bracelet I made. You can still see my handiwork in the weave.”
“Wait, so you make chainmail instead of knitting? Dang, and here I thought you really were gay. You got one shred of manliness left in you. Nice job.”
“My sexual proclivities are none of your concern. No, not even as an alternate of myself,” said Lalonde before Strider could protest. “Goodness, one would think you were a shipper. We're much too young to be certain of those sorts of things, and in far too dire straights for it to be a pressing concern. Leave the question of romancing until after the war is won.”
Well, Strider didn't have much to say to that. There was that strangely uncomfortable silence again.
This time, it was Lalonde who broke it.
“Why are you here, David,” he said, softly, looking at his hands.
“Man, deep question. Why are we here, man? What could possibly be the -”
“Spare me your quaint sarcasm. Give me truth, Strider.”
Strider sat back up and considered. Why was he here, after all? It was a surprisingly good question. After the incident with Harley, he'd almost forgotten.
“Power,” he said at last. “I wanted to see what other me's were like, if any of you had hit the god tiers. Needed to know if I could get strong enough to...”
“To win.”
“Yeah.”
Lalonde closed his eyes, and sighed, just a little.
“But power always has a price. And I don't believe you'll find what you seek, though you may find what you need. It seems that even with the influence of environment, there are still certain things we fear.”
“Sorry, but I have a hard time believing that a Lalonde gives a damn about the price of things.”
Lalonde opened his eyes and gave Strider an icy glare. “I know not what deals with demons your Lalonde - is it Rose? Rose, then, oh, gods, I shudder to imagine what being raised by our mother has done to her - point being, I know not what demons she has dealt with. I will say this, though. There is a reason this palace is filled with searing light and hidden stairs, there is a reason this house is a labyrinth”
Strider nearly covered his ears at that last sentence. Something... hollow... echoed in it. He kept his expression neutral, of course. Stay cool.
“Fair 'nuff, he said. “New topic: how were you doing what you did back there? I thought only the Time player could pull those kinds of slick speed shenanigans.”
“Light is a tricky element,” said Lalonde. “Far more than most realize. Many seem to think that Light equates to Good, and this is far, far from the truth.”
He lifted one hand, and summoned a pale white light to it. “Light can illuminate...”
It flashed brightly, leaving spots on Strider's vision.
“Or it can blind. It can enlighten, or it can sear. What you see with it might be valuable, or it might drive you to madness and despair. Light is not good or evil; it is, quite simply, knowledge. Some would call it fortune, but I take a different path. There is, after all, no such thing as luck - odds, certainly, but in the end we are playing chess, not dice. A Thief might steal another's ability to see the whole board, might use their light to blind, thereby changing their 'fortune'. A Seer might simply see the whole board, to know all there is to know - for ill or for good. And a Knight? A Knight will have to use their light to burn, to defend. In addition - ”
“Dave, I'm real happy for you and I'mma let you finish, but I asked how you were movin so fast, not for some lecture on metaphysics.”
There was that thin smile again.
“Striders. Always so cagey about themselves, and always so direct with others. Simple - I can move as light, or with light. As for the illusions and burning pillars here, I can control light. The curious thing about light, you see, is that it sets the speed limit for the universe. It is the absolute fastest you can move within the fabric of space-time, and, thus, as you grow closer to it, time slows for you. In a way, the faster you move along the space axis, the slower you move through time. Simple relativity.”
So that physics shit Bro had drilled into his head really did have a use. That was... actually kind of interesting. It fit in with what Dave Harley had said about space and time being the same thing.
“Okay. So how do you do that without a focusing item?”
“To put it like a Strider, 'shenanigans'.”
“Gotcha.”
“Then, another question, if I may: what have you gained, David?”
Not what he was seeking, certainly. But perhaps...
Through a house of mirrors...
“Knowledge of self.”
This time, Lalonde's smile was not thin at all.
“Then it was not a worthless effort.”
“Nah. Sometimes we gotta look into the glass.”
Lalonde frowned almost imperceptibly at that phrase, but said nothing.
“Anyway, catch ya on the flip side, Lalonde. It's been real. Be quicker 'bout the stairs next time and maybe I'll listen.”
“It's unlikely I will; it has indeed been real; I'll do my best; and no, you won't. Though... speaking of warnings.”
They both stood. Lalonde handed the iShades and timetables to Strider. However, Lalonde kept one of the vinyls in his hands, turning it over.
This one was orange.
He knew he shouldn't have made it, he knew. But a part of him had burned with curiosity. Part of him had needed to know. So he'd taken a handful of orange feathers and used them to alchemize the disk.
It held so many answers. Maybe more to that question – knowledge of self – than he'd get anywhere else.
“Take it from one who walks in light; the razor's edge between knowing and madness. There are some things one is not meant to know; some histories best left in dust. If you are indeed anything like my dear Jade Strider, and if this record represents the timeline I think it does...”
He sighed, and handed it over.
“Power has a price. And knowledge, too, is power.”
“You get that one from a fortune cookie? Nah, I'm good. Take care of yourself, aiight?”
IF YOU MISSED IT - THE LARGE BLANK SPACE IN THE MIDDLE HAS WHTIETEXT IN IT! GO BACK AND HIGHLIGHT IT FOR EXTRA LAYERS OF DELICIOUSNESS
There's a reason that David Lalonde speaks in Courier font. Kass is not allowed to explain what it is because she probably knows already
I hit a HUGE stumbling block here and had to revise like CRAZY. Originally there was a kicking sweet fight scene between the Daves showing off their powers which I cut entirely, and also we saw more of Lalonde's special brand of crazy. I decided to make his crazy a bit more subtle. Also bluh I really lost Dave's voice there for a while, but I'll pretend it was him having a problem with stairs and being a bit rattled by that.
FINALLY! I could, at this point, do another chapter - another iteration of Orange - but I am feeling a bit burned out. Still, if people really want to see it and are willing to wait, I could give it a shot.
So. Who wants to see Orange - Dark Cover?
Last edited by lucidSeraph; 01-01-2011 at 05:32 PM.
Originally Posted by Wigmund
She uses the astrological symbol for Earth since she's the first troll born here.
