MSPA Fanfiction IV

[absoluteCertainty]

*quickly logs onto computer*

hey
hey doodled
is your story following Dine/Knox or not?
because mysteries are awesome

for example, terezi is the detective obviously so she can't be the culprit, and the culprit is a character already presented in the story
stuff like that

Dine/Knox?

I mean, it is sort of a mystery story, and the culprit IS a character in the story... mostly...

People might not be what they seem...

knox rules
dine rules

dine > knox

pretty much the rules just exist for easier solving and/or trolling
if you didn't mean for the mystery to be solvable to the readers then that's ok
although it is kind of trollish mystery writing, but i am used to that too, hehehe ._.;
it was not your intention to troll if you didn't know because are there any other mystery novel fans here? looks like no! ok then

also the rules are for human mysteries so when "magic" beings are involved things go to shit pretty fast, as has been proven recently in my obvious fandom xD

[X15lm204]

@SkaianRedeemer: There is no praise sufficiently vociferous, so I'll just leave this simple message.

Thanks to this, I'll be going to bed content and joyful, rather than sad and worried.



Hey, guys, do we have an equivalent to the horn pile for happy tears?

[Isoraqathedh]

No. 4.13.06: Hilarious (?) Outtakes: Homestuck

Contains high levels of tables, so linked.

[Doodled]

Skaian...

Your story...

SO. MUCH. WIN.

[JudgeDeadd]

No. 4.13.06: Hilarious (?) Outtakes: Homestuck

Contains high levels of tables, so linked.

Haha, I want moar. Now someone's got to make them graphically. Iso, we are lucky to have someone as creative as you around here.

(though I didn't get the one about coughing, is this a Chinese joke)

[Sionnan]

Hey look, fic that has nothing to do with the Striders.

This is because I can imagine a psychic who can hear the voices of the dead would have days where it's okay, and days that are just totally off the wall. In a nutshell, Sollux is having a bad day, and Terezi pesters him. I may continue it with some more narrative format, since Sollux has invaded my brain somehow.

Edit: colors and single spaced, as suggested by Skaian.

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gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

GC: H3Y
GC: H3Y
GC: H3Y SOLLUX ANSW3R M3
TA: oh god 2ut up
GC: WHY YOU S33M MOR3 T3STY TH4N USU4L
TA: ii have a headache
TA: and you are screaming iinto my computer numbnuts
GC: WHY Y3S 1 B3L13V3 MY NUTS 4R3 NUMB
GC: OH W41T
GC: 1 DONT H4V3 4NY
TA: ohhhh goooooddddd
GC: : ?
TA: ii ju2t
TA: threw up
TA: all over my maiinframe2
TA: everythiing 2mell2 liike honey and vomiit
GC: 4R3 YOU S1CK
TA: oh god ii ju2t told you
TA: headache
TA: ii dont even have the energy two 2cream at you
TA: two bu2y puking
GC: OK4Y
GC: 1s th1s b3tt3r?
TA: that ju2t look2 riidiiculou2
GC: 3X4CTLY
GC: WHY DO3S YOUR BR41N HURT
TA: everythiing that ii2 iin my head ii2 beiing pu2hed out
GC: PUSH3D?
TA: yeah. iim ju2t haviing a bad day
GC: W41T WH4T DO YOU M34N PUSH3D?
GC: 1 4M L3G1T1M4T3LY CUR1OUS
TA: legiitiimately really
TA: fa2ciinatiing
TA: but 2eriiou2ly ii feel liike my head ii2 going to explode 2o
TA: ii miight a2 well tell you
TA: becau2e at lea2t one per2on iin the world wiill know why iif they fiind my braiinmeat 2cattered over the wall2
GC: GO ON
GC: 1 W1LL 1NFORM TH3 WORLD
TA: no a22hole
TA: only iif thii2 end2 up kiiling me
GC: PROC33D
TA: becau2e right now all that ii2 iin my head
TA: ii2 the thou2and2 of miilliion2 of the voiice2 of the dead
TA: and they wont 2hut up
TA: and ii dont know what to do
TA: 2o ii am 2iittiing here driinkiing thii2 retarded gaygo
TA: liike gamzee 2o fucking helpfully 2ugge2ted
TA: whiich ii2 now mo2tly on the floor and my moniitor
GC: ...
GC: ...
TA: what do you mean "..."
GC: 1 M34N "..."
GC: H4V3 YOU TR13D T4K1NG 4N ASP1R1N OR SOM3TH1NG
TA: oh for
TA: youd thiink iid be u2ed to thii2 by now riight
GC: WH4T MY R3T4RD3D SUGG3ST1ONS?
TA: no but that two
TA: ii mean the voiice2
TA: u2ually ii can 2ort of
TA: tune them out ii gue22
TA: but riight now it2 like they had 2ome mind honey or 2omethiing
TA: or that weiird aliien drug that makes you have crazy retard 2uper 2trength
GC: ... V14GR4?
TA: ye2 terezii
TA: viiagra

[SkaianRedeemer]

@Wigmund: In recap1 I called Karkat and John the Statler and Waldorf of Bromance, and it would seem it goes even further than that! In fact, I may have found a theme for my next recap. Also, I caught up on your Princess Bride fic during my aesthetic forum silence, it was great!

@X15: This forum has been dedicated to building up a horn pile of Wonder of the World proportions the past few days. Eventually I reached post 299 and had to stop talking, just to look back every once and a while and go "They're killin' me. I'll never gonna pull this off." But things brightened in the thread, and I did the best I could! I don't know about a happy tears pile. I think someone already defined "shitty wand pile" a few pages back in one of these threads. RDV has an excessive pile of comfy pillows, can we work with that?

@Doodled: Thank you!

@absoluteCertainty: I'm a mystery novel fan to a degree, but obviously not hardcore enough to know the Dine/Knox rules by anything but reputation and it would appear I don't much agree with them, but let's not get into that. I actually have done a mystery fanfic (not Homestuck) with the supernatural and it leans heavily on teaching first and making sure everything stands up on a second read, the latter of which is one of Dine's points, apparently.

@Sionnan: Eehhh on the formatting. I know colour tags are a pain but they really make pesterlogs a lot easier to read (then again, it is Sollux, whose yellow is just a pain one way or another...). Single spacing is more up in the air, stylistically, but I favour it because double spacing flips the "new paragraph" flag in my head - even if you don't, which is fine, the first few lines should at least match. On the other hand, the jokes are great and the voices are spot on, as usual. Would like to see more!

[Ganato]

Dat ending.

OH DEAR GOD DAT ENDING!

[Kawa]

I lost it at vii4gr4.

[lucidSeraph]

@Sionnan: Oooh! Something fresh and new from you! I like it much and OH GOD LOL THAT LAST PART fffff

[Wigmund]

Content Removed By Mod

Sorry, but the rules are very clear about the portrayal of pregnancy with regards to the underage characters, regardless of aging up.

[Graven_Image]

Indystuck

Chapter 6

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OPEN PESTERLOG

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videomaticPrecognitive began pestering viridianVoyager

VP: Hello, Viridian.
VP: How go the repairs?
VV: Not good.
VV: Somehow our navigation core got completely fried!
VP: That sounds...
VP: ...very very bad.
VV: Yeah.
VV: Without a working core, we're stuck light-years away from anywhere.
VV: And worst of all, we don't have any way to dodge this meteor!
VV: It's looking pretty bad...
VP: Never fear!
VP: I managed to find the meteor that is headed for your ship.
VV: Wow, really?
VV: How far away is it?
VP: I do not have any accurate frames of reference.
VP: But I see no spacecraft from where I stand.
VP: You are relatively safe for now.
VV: So wait...
VV You're ON it right now?
VP: Indeed.
VP: If I can, I will try to persuade Benli to project you into the game before I am sent in.
VV: Why?
VP: We appear to be running a game of predestination.
VP: Should this meteor disappear, another will no doubt be flying at you from some other direction.
VV: So...
VV: What do you plan on doing with the meteor once I get in?
VP: I realized that, as a free-floating being, I was at a disadvantage when it came to deploying the various phernalia the game required.
VP: So I will simply play the game from this asteroid.
VV: Huh...
VV: That's actually pretty smart!
VP: I am Glad you think so
VP: What was I Doing
VV: Nothing, I guess.
VV: Were you going to talk to Benli?
VP: I do not Recall Saying that
VP: But the Idea has Merit
VV: Okay, well...
VV: We'll keep trying to fix the ship in the meantime.
VP: You Do That
VP: Goodbye

videomaticPrecognitive ceased pestering viridianVoyager

OPEN PESTERLOG

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craftyMiner began pestering dwarvenSniper

CM: so youre the dwarf they got for our eighth man
CM: figured they would have found someone without urist in his name
DS: oy its a long and proud tradition
DS: me grandfather was named urist
CM: and let me guess his father
CM: and his father
CM: and all their fathers were all urists as well
DS: isnt he great everybody lets all give im a big hand
DS: in case you didnt notice only my last name is mcurist
DS: me first name is benli
CM: right so benli mcurist
CM: well
CM: at least ill have another digger on this team
DS: och aye
DS: excavatin through the earth
DS: findin rare and exotic materials like ruby
DS: adamantine
DS: diamonds
CM: especially diamonds
DS: oh whys that
DS: you got a ladyfriend the rest of us need to know about
CM: no
CM: its just
CM: i really like diamond
CM: made a suit of armor out of it and everything
DS: ...
CM: what
DS: you know what steve
DS: you and i are gonna get along juuuust fine
CM: yeah
CM: so
CM: how about them elves right
DS: oh don't get me STARTED on the elves

OPEN PESTERLOG

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redMeat began pestering viridianVoyager

RM: ok so
RM: i got a little more information out of the spike girl
RM: apparently you're supposed to be building up my house
RM: whatever that means
RM: and i'm supposed to be learning something called alchemy
RM: whatever that means
RM: viridian
RM: hello
VV: Sorry!
VV: Still trying to fix the ship here.
RM: oh no problem
RM: but has Steve come up with any blinding insights as to how to interpret this mess
VV: Well, I'd ask him, but he's busy talking with someone else.
VV: A dwarf, going by the name.
RM: oh nuts
RM: is it dwarvenSniper
VV: Yes...?
RM: fantastic
RM: someone invited Benli
RM: the only dwarf in a thousand miles who owns a crossbow
VV: Well, that doesn't seem so bad.
RM: i said he owned one
RM: i said nothing about him being any good with it
VV: Uhh...
VV: Oh.
VV: :|
RM: yeah
RM: "oh"
RM: i guess i'll see if can't find out what edwina sawserhands is talking about
RM: good luck with the ship and all that
VV: Bye!

redMeat ceased pestering viridianVoyager

[Katrika]

Sionnan: Oh man, that was great!

Wigmund: Pfffft...too funny.

[DJ-P0N3]

Why am I continuing this?
Oh yeah
Why the hell not?

Troll Story
part 2

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The toys inside of Andrew’s room hustles and bustles about every which way, the floor is busy with various activities of these commodities. Up on the bed Rufio is busy tending to his own business, he inquires to Dave, whom stands on the small counter beside the bed.

”uHHH, dAVE HAVE YOU SEEN NEPETA,”

Dave shakes his head and leans back a bit, ”havent seen the cat all damn day bro”

”oKAY, tHANKS I GUESS, i WILL FIND HER MYSELF,” Rufio hops down from the bed and lands down onto the floor, he looks around for a moment and fixes his hat before calling out, ”hEY, uHHHHH, nEPETA?”.

Out from under the bed Nepeta crawls out, she is pushing along a checkerboard with some poorly placed pieces on it, she looks at Rufio and nudges his leg, ”:33 < *the lioness approaches Rufio in a friendly manner with her tail and head held high, she wiggles her butt with excitement.*” she places the checkerboard out, ”:33 < here I am rufio! :33 < I am going to be red this time.”.

”nO NEP, i-“.

”:SS < well okay, you can be red this time.”, she scurries over to the other side hastily.

”nOT NOW NEP, i, uHH, nEPETA I HAVE BAD NEWS,”

”:cc < *the lioness frowns and gasps* bad news?!”

”uHHH, sSSHHH,”, Rufio places a hand over Nepeta’s mouth and tries to keep her quiet.

The toys all screech to a halt and look at Rufio and Nepeta. They can all tell something might be wrong, but they aren’t sure. They gauge the reaction Rufio has to all this attention, as well as Nepeta’s. Rufio whispers to Nepeta, ”jUST GATHER EVERYONE FOR A STAFF MEETING,”.

Nepeta nods and trots off.

”aND BE HAPPY,”

”:33 < *the lioness wags her tail joyfully as she prances off to a staff m33ting* h33h33!”.

Rufio walks away from Nepeta and messes with his hat a bit and puffs out his chest, he is going to need to break some upsetting news to the rest of the toys. He notices two others hiding under the bed, he commands them firmly, ”fALCOR, jOHNNY FIVE, pODIUM,”.

Falcor slinks back under the bed, he didn’t have time for this. Johnny 5 disagrees and grabs him, pulling Falcor out from under the bed as the two of them go off to get the podium.

Rufio walks past the 4th wall. He doesn’t even notice till they are five paces away from one another. The two of them halt. Rufio looks over his shoulder a moment and grins, ”uHHH, fOURTH WALL, dRAW,”. Rufio turned around and raised his lance towards the 4th wall. The wall turned around as well and flickered blue for a moment before sowing an image of Ahab’s Crosshairs. The humming noise began to sound more like ‘pew pew’. Rufio clutched his side, humoring the wall, ”wOW, yOU GOT ME,” Rufio exclaims, ”yOU HAVE BEEN, uHHH, iMPROVING,”.

The wall tilts itself forward slightly as if to nod. It goes back on its way, with a bit of a higher self esteem.

Nepeta trots along past John and a few other toys. She has he tail raised high and her ears reeled back, ”:33 < staff m33ting you guys, let’s go!”. Nepeta leads the way as the fellow toys follow her to the meeting.

Rufio looks around for something important to him, his doodlepad. Without it he doesn’t have list of the day’s agenda. He spots it far off from where he had last placed it. He strolls over to it and questions aloud, ”uHHH, wHO MOVED MY DOODLEPAD WAY OVER HERE,”. As Rufio kneels down to get it, as he stands up and looks up and spies Terezi.

”RO4R”, she shouts loudly in Rufio’s face. She then reels it back a bit and asks politely, ”W3R3 YOU SC4R3D B3 HON3ST”.

Rufio shrugs a bit, ”uHHH, i WAS CLOSE TO BEING SCARED THAT TIME,”. He doesn’t want to admit it made him jump inside, it was truly fairly frightening. He begins to walk to the podium as Terezi continues to question whether or not she is scary.

”1M TRY1NG TO GO FOR F34RSOM3” she says with a saddened tone, ”BUT 1 TH1NK 1M JUST COM1NG OFF 4S 4NNOY1NG”.

Rufio continues on his way, trying to ignore the sad speaking. He feels a stinging sensation in his buttocks before the collar of his clothes is tugged by a trident and he is standing face to face with Feferi. She smiles at him happily, trying to seem casual. ”oH, hI FEFERI,”.

”I wanted to t)(ank you, Rufio, for saving my lusii glub glub.”.

”uHHHH, iT WAS NOTHING,”.

”W-Ell, w)(at do you say I get som-Eon-E –Els-E to watc)( the s-Ea)(ors-Es tonig)(t?”.

Rufio flushes orange, he knows exactly what she means. He is fond of her and would like to, but wishes she wouldn’t be so open about it in a public manner such as this. He nods and giggles a bit, ”uHHHHH, oH YEAH, sURE,”. Rufio wasn’t very good at this flirting business.

Feferi walked away from him to tend to her business, waving her hips in a teasing matter. ”If you n-E-Ed m-E, I’m just a coupl-E of blocks away.”. Her tone is very flirtatious; her feelings couldn’t be more obvious. Rufio watches her with a sense of desire in his eyes, but there are other matters to attend to.

Nepeta goes to business aligning the toys in proper order, ”:33 < come on, come on. :33 < smaller toys upfront!”. They stand in a cluttered manner. Barely any elbow room among them. Nepeta calls out for Rufio to take his place behind the podium, ”:33 < come on rufio!”.

Rufio turns back to Nepeta and approaches the podium. He takes his position behind it and fixes his doddlepad accordingly. He waits for all the other toys to silence themselves before he begins to announce the key news of the day, ”uHHH, fIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS, oHHH UHHH, hAS EVERYONE PICKED A MOVING BUDDY,”.

The toys look among one another, a little startled. They share senses of concern, worry, and disbelief. A few of them thought this was merely a sarcastic suggestion, or perhaps witty banter. They had no idea Rufio had actually meant it when he said it.

Rose shook her head, ”You can’t be serious.”.

”1 D1DN’T KNOW W3 H4D TO H4V3 ON3 4LR34DY”

”do we have to hold hands?”, John holds one of his arms up with the other, he chuckles to himself. No one else seems to find it very funny.

Rufio shook his head in disbelief and disappointment, ”uHHH, yOU GUYS THINK THIS IS FUNNY, bUT THIS IS IMPORTANT, wE ONLY HAVE ONE WEEK BEFORE THE MOVE,” Rufio sputters on, ”i DON’T WANT ANY TOYS LEFT BEHIND, sO AS FOR A MOVING BUDDY, iF YOU DON’T HAVE ONE, uHHH, gET ONE,”. Rufio glances at the doodlepad to remind himself of further news. ”lAST WEEKS PLASTIC COROSION AWARENESS MEETING WAS, uHHH, i THINK, a BIG SUCCESS, sO UHHHH, tHANK MR. SPELL FOR THAT,”

A short round of applause goes out to Mr. Spell, who had done a good job.

Rufio lifts up a paper on his doodlepad, there was one last item to go over. He says it softly, as hoping to lighten the blow of the news, ”uHHH, oH YEAH, aND ANDREW’S PARTY HAS BEEN MOVED TO, uHHHHHHHH, tODAY,”.

All of the toys gasp for a moment, then begin to flip the fuck out like never before. This was far from good news. If anything this was perhaps the most troublesome news they could possibly receive at a time like this.

”WH4T BUT 1 THOUGHT 4NDR3W’S B1RTHD4Y W4SN’T T1LL N3XT W33K.”

”Is this some horrible attempt at one ups-manship? Or has Ms. Paint gone completely insane?”

Rufio shrugged it off, ”uHHH, oBVIOUSLY SHE WANTS TO HAVE THE PARTY BEFORE THE MOVE, yOU, uHHHH, yOU SHOULDN’T BE WORRIED,” Rufio tried to calm and assure the toys, ”uHH, i’M NOT WORRIED,”.

”of course you aren’t worried. you have been andrew’s favorite since the start of homestuck!”. John raised a valid point, the toys talked amongst themselves.

”:33 < hey hey! come on egg head!”, Nepeta came in to try and save her friend, she strolled up the front of the podium, ”:33 < if rufio says its alright, then this lioness has is back!” She smiles widely,”:33 < rufio has never lied to us before!".

Author's notes

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Cut off mid conversation, but I didn't want to exceed my 5 page a part rule. Almost done with a small portion of Toy Story, future roles are up for debate.
If anyone has a good suggestion.

[sebastian]

Interesting, maybe you are following the movie plot a little too strictly but it is fun to read (and it is just part two) now I'm curious to see who is Buzz L8years, I mean Lightyears.

edit: oh, you want suggestion, well, Vriska as Buzz seem good seen her antagonist relationship with Tavros and her "I'm way better than you" attitude, Karkat could be the sergeant of the toy soldiers, it seems fitting, I don't know about the others. Sid could be SS, his sister could be CD, i have no idea who the others could be.

[DJ-P0N3]

Interesting, maybe you are following the movie plot a little too strictly but it is fun to read (and it is just part two) now I'm curious to see who is Buzz L8years, I mean Lightyears. .

I might be.
But its possibly because I want to try and keep this more to the movie than to Homestuck.

I might try to change SOMETHING up.

[Katrika]

Crossposting from here.

Ghosty Trickster, Part One

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The graveyard was still and quiet. Dad doesn’t know it, but I like to go there after school some days. It’s a quiet place to sit and do my homework, unlike at home (one of the few disadvantages to living in a circus). I’d barely gotten settled under this big old oak tree when I heard a scream. Normal kids my age might have run at that point, but I’m not exactly normal.

My name is John Egbert, and at night I patrol the city as Egbert Man. I might be only sixteen years old, but I was bitten by a radioactive tornado, and developed superpowers as a result!

Wait, that’s ridiculous. Tornados don’t have teeth.

I think.

I’ve actually had superpowers for as long as I can remember. Dad says I fell from the sky in a meteor while the circus was in Kansas, and he had to beat off a couple of farmers by the name of Kent to get to me. Then again, Dad ALSO says that he once tamed a unicorn and travelled back in time to start the world’s first circus, so I take it with a grain of salt.

Where was I? Oh, right, the scream. As quick as I can (which is pretty quick, but not as fast as a speeding bullet), I run to this booth-like grave marker and change into my Egbert Man outfit. Gotta keep my indentity secret, after all! There’s no telling what would happen if word got out that John Egbert was Egbert man.

I even disguise my civilian identity by wearing glasses. Nobody has ever figured it out!

Oh man, I got off topic again, didn’t I? After changing into my costume, I ran over to where I heard the scream. There wasn’t anybody there, though. Just a gravestone splashed with dark red paint in a smiley face pattern. The top was chipped a little, like someone had tried to smash it. On the gravestone I could make out a name, Aradia Megido, and two dates. The second date was exactly a month before then, and there was a familiar crest below it.

Someone had defaced the grave of a cop.

I turned around to try to catch a glimpse of who did it, but instead came face to face with…her.

TO BE CONTINUED

[Lexxy]

For clarification! Ectobiological baby-making between kid and/or trolls is technically safe by forum standards, so long as all that is involved in the process is straight up genetic cloning without the accompaniment of any suggestive actions. The implication of or outright depiction or description of the underage characters becoming pregnant or being sexually active is very much against the rules, no matter how tastefully or humorously it is done. Aging up the characters does not excuse this. I would also avoid broaching the subject of hitting puberty and the details thereof out of courtesy, as that can easily flirt with inappropriateness and can make others uncomfortable.

If you guys are ever concerned that a fic you have written might be too violent or too suggestive or otherwise potentially inappropriate, don't hesitate to PM me! I'll give it a read and let you know what's up :3

[Wigmund]

Well, I guess that means I'm done doing anything until I'm unjailed. I had fun.

[sebastian]

What? a month without Wigmund's fanfics? Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

Harsh.

(is it a month? Am I reading it right?)

[Wigmund]

Meh, I needed to stop and start getting ready for the Spring semester of college anyways.
I'm just hoping that me getting slammed for being an idiot doesn't kill the mood here.

I might contribute something before the month is up, but definitely not right now or in the immediate future.
I just hope I didn't lose all those links in my sig whenever it returns :\

[egregiousBass]

Herp derp. Sorry to hear that.

I might have something cooking to make up for the sudden loss in black liquid sorrow.

[Wigmund]

Good! Because the more fics people write, the more willing I'll be to start writing again.

It's kinda like that whole 'clap your hands if you believe in fairies' thing from Peter Pan, except it involves fanfics and me learning to catch my grammar mistakes before I hit the 'post' button.

I'm just sad that it'll be two days after my 27th birthday when I'm unjailed :P But hey, I guess it's a late birthday present from the forums.

[DJ-P0N3]

This jailing has me a little worried.
I had an idea, now bluh
I think I will have to be a bit more careful with what I have in mind.

[Ember]

Hey MSB, there's no need to worry. Like Lexxy said, when in doubt, just run it by a mod before you post and everything will be fine!