MSPA Fanfiction IV

[KilroyWasHere]

fffff I haven't looked at this thread lately and now I don't even know where I left off.

[mutecebu]

@sinnoan:
Mutant Italian food. Hah.

[Godot]

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I'm gonna end up doing two of these a day i bet

Courtstuck-4

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Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirit [BS] began pestering ladiesMan [LM] --
BS: uh
BS: hi larry
BS: would you like to play a game?
LM: i no u?
BS: larry its me
BS: maya :|
LM: ...oooo ya nicks gf rite
BS: no im not aaargh we go through this every time
LM: lol calm down grl
LM: so wts this bout a game
BS: i got a game for you to play
BS: it
BS: it lets you meet chicks yeah
LM: orly
BS: franziska will be playing
LM: franzy???
LM: sign me up

burgerSpirits [BS] sent Sburb client.EXE
burgerSpirits [BS] sent Sburb server.EXE

BS: ill get back to you with instructions ok?
LM: k lol
-- burgerSpirits [BS] ceased pestering ladiesMan [LM] --

Spiritlog

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??: I believe it is time to start the game.
MAYA: wait what
MAYA: but edgy and franz need to get the stuff!!!
??: Don't worry, they'll recieve their games in due time.
??: But i'm sure you don't want to be flattened by a meteor.
MAYA: uhhh
MAYA: point taken

Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirits [BS] began pestering takeThat [TT] --
BS: ok nick is the game all set up yet
TT: Sorry Maya, I've been having computer troubles ever since we last talked.
BS: WHAT
BS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
TT: Wow, this must be a really good game if you want to play it that badly.
BS: I DONT WANNA BE CRUSHED BY A METEOR ;-;
TT: Is that the premise of the game?
BS: kdsjbl,bslvzlbrkvbelwbuvwvnlsdnwilan,zev
TT: Uhhh...
-- burgerSpirits [BS] ceased pestering takeThat [TT] --

Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirits [BS] began pestering aceDetective [AD] --
BS: GUMSHOEHELP
A woah whats the rush
BS: is your game ready please tell me its ready
A uhh yeah
A but it keeps telling me i need to connect to another player :\
A tell me next time if its a multeplayer game
BS: ok you see a box to put in a name for your client player
A uhh
A oh yeah!
BS: ok put in my screenname hurry!
A uhh
A there!
-- burgerSpirits [BS] has been disconnected --
A i didnt do it!

oh god gumshoe what did you do.

*is praying for a Godot appearance*

As awesome as that'd be, I'm trying to keep in canon here. No coffee addicts I'm afraid.

What if... Godot gets one phone call in jail, and that phone call is from a cellphone, a cellphone with internet access.

And with said internet accsess he manages to download the game and enter his session through his cell?

It was kind of implied that he died, however.

So unless Maya channels him, it's like impossible.

What what what what.

Noooooo, he did not die. He merely... well, he went to jail, I'll just say that. That's all. He certainly did not die, at least not as quickly as before Phoenix lost his license and stopped hanging out with Maya in Apollo Justice's backstory.

Although, that makes me question, where's Pearl in this story?

It's implied bro.

Let me get the info.

I'm an Ace AttorneyTard and a huge Godot fan. I don't want to believe it either, but I doubt that he's alive.

I am also a huge Ace Attorney tard and a huge Godot fan and I am pretty sure he did not die! I mean, MAYBE he was put on death row or something but unless he committed suicide (which is rather doubtful from the ending of PW3) I am fairly sure he is still alive but in prison! Maybe you are misconstruing metaphor/symbolism/whatever for actual death? He puts his coma akin to him "dying" and him coming back from the dead to get 'revenge' on Phoenix and stuff.

OBJECTION!

The issue is that he might not need it. It was strongly implied that he died because of the stress/poison caused weakness combination.

And even if he didn't get the death penalty, considering the circumstances, his body was already shutting down. He said so himself, he had to go in for constant "tune ups" just to keep himself barely living.

Now that he's lost all reason to seek revenge on Phoenix, ironically thanks to Phoenix himself, he finally can go in peace, so to speak.

Not to mention the game hints at him dying with that picture of him with Mia and Misty.

Hey guess what SOMETHING I DONT SUCK AT

Courtstuck-6

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Open Pesterlog

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--burgerSpirits [BS] began pestering aceDetective [AD] --
BS: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
A maya youre okay! :'D
BS: gumsoe what have you been doing in that game???
A oh man this thing is awesome pal!
A even though all ive done is place a nuch of things in a house that looks errilly similar to yours and a mini you is scampering around
BS: please be careful with what you do because everything you see is REAL
BS: that is my house
BS: that is me
BS: AND THAT WAS MY TOILET >:|
BS: also try not to be so loud pearly is asleep
A but its the middle of the day pal
BS: *shrug*
BS: she likes her naps
BS: anyways i have no idea what to do next
A oh
A turn the weel thingie on the alchething
BS: i have to go near that thing again??
A just try it pal!
A you may get a prize
A oh hey i see you running around again
A whoops forgot to place one last item
BS: okay im b
BS: gumshoe why is there a card on top of my head
A well i tried to put it where youd see it
A but you moved :V
BS: huh its got a picture on it
A yeah but i couldnt recognise it :\
BS: its a magatama
A a what?
BS: spirit mediums wear them around their necks
A ...oooohhhh
A thats what that was
A i always thought you feys just had weird taste in neckwear :B
BS: gee thanks
A sure thing pal!
BS: anyways what am i supposed to do with this
BS: and the cylinder of...purple i got from the thingie
A i dunno :\
BS: wait i got it!
BS: brb
A oh hey did you know that machine with the tube in it has a timer on it?
A has 20 secs left
A oh man im so bad at timed games
A i always want to explore everything but timers wont let me do that
A whatre you doing anyways?

0:15
You place the strange stone and the card in their respective slots on the totem lathe

0:13
You run over to the alchemizer (thankfully gumshoe was smart enough to leave everything close together) and place the carved totem on the small platform.

0:11
A humanoid shape made of the same substance as the totem appears on the platform, and a purple magatama drops from its neck. The humanoid vanishes soon after.

0:05
You've tried everything. Throwing it, shaking it, even biting it. But nothing happens.

0:04
And then the obvious solution enters your mind.

0:03
You pick up the magatama off the floor,

0:02
Cup it between your hands

0:01
And charge it with as much spiritual energy as you can muster.

0:00
With that, a meteor struck, and the Fey Manor was no longer of this planet.

Open Pesterlog

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A maya?!
A MAYA!?!?!?
A MAYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

WAIT YOU SUCK AT STUFF?

Because by reading this I honestly wouldn't be able to tell.

I need more.

Maya. D=

[Metaflare]

WAIT YOU SUCK AT STUFF?

That was all chapter five was. A big pile of suck.
I'm much, MUCH better when all i need to work with is dialouge

[Nexev]

Ironically that is the exact opposite with me.

I am too impatient and half ass my convos.

...

PARTNERSH-

Nah, you have better things to do.

But if you seriously have trouble doing a certain part of the fic I can paraphrase it for you.

[sarasvati]

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I'm gonna end up doing two of these a day i bet

Courtstuck-4

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Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirit [BS] began pestering ladiesMan [LM] --
BS: uh
BS: hi larry
BS: would you like to play a game?
LM: i no u?
BS: larry its me
BS: maya :|
LM: ...oooo ya nicks gf rite
BS: no im not aaargh we go through this every time
LM: lol calm down grl
LM: so wts this bout a game
BS: i got a game for you to play
BS: it
BS: it lets you meet chicks yeah
LM: orly
BS: franziska will be playing
LM: franzy???
LM: sign me up

burgerSpirits [BS] sent Sburb client.EXE
burgerSpirits [BS] sent Sburb server.EXE

BS: ill get back to you with instructions ok?
LM: k lol
-- burgerSpirits [BS] ceased pestering ladiesMan [LM] --

Spiritlog

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??: I believe it is time to start the game.
MAYA: wait what
MAYA: but edgy and franz need to get the stuff!!!
??: Don't worry, they'll recieve their games in due time.
??: But i'm sure you don't want to be flattened by a meteor.
MAYA: uhhh
MAYA: point taken

Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirits [BS] began pestering takeThat [TT] --
BS: ok nick is the game all set up yet
TT: Sorry Maya, I've been having computer troubles ever since we last talked.
BS: WHAT
BS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
TT: Wow, this must be a really good game if you want to play it that badly.
BS: I DONT WANNA BE CRUSHED BY A METEOR ;-;
TT: Is that the premise of the game?
BS: kdsjbl,bslvzlbrkvbelwbuvwvnlsdnwilan,zev
TT: Uhhh...
-- burgerSpirits [BS] ceased pestering takeThat [TT] --

Open Pesterlog

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-- burgerSpirits [BS] began pestering aceDetective [AD] --
BS: GUMSHOEHELP
A woah whats the rush
BS: is your game ready please tell me its ready
A uhh yeah
A but it keeps telling me i need to connect to another player :\
A tell me next time if its a multeplayer game
BS: ok you see a box to put in a name for your client player
A uhh
A oh yeah!
BS: ok put in my screenname hurry!
A uhh
A there!
-- burgerSpirits [BS] has been disconnected --
A i didnt do it!

oh god gumshoe what did you do.

*is praying for a Godot appearance*

As awesome as that'd be, I'm trying to keep in canon here. No coffee addicts I'm afraid.

What if... Godot gets one phone call in jail, and that phone call is from a cellphone, a cellphone with internet access.

And with said internet accsess he manages to download the game and enter his session through his cell?

It was kind of implied that he died, however.

So unless Maya channels him, it's like impossible.

What what what what.

Noooooo, he did not die. He merely... well, he went to jail, I'll just say that. That's all. He certainly did not die, at least not as quickly as before Phoenix lost his license and stopped hanging out with Maya in Apollo Justice's backstory.

Although, that makes me question, where's Pearl in this story?

It's implied bro.

Let me get the info.

I'm an Ace AttorneyTard and a huge Godot fan. I don't want to believe it either, but I doubt that he's alive.

I am also a huge Ace Attorney tard and a huge Godot fan and I am pretty sure he did not die! I mean, MAYBE he was put on death row or something but unless he committed suicide (which is rather doubtful from the ending of PW3) I am fairly sure he is still alive but in prison! Maybe you are misconstruing metaphor/symbolism/whatever for actual death? He puts his coma akin to him "dying" and him coming back from the dead to get 'revenge' on Phoenix and stuff.

OBJECTION!

The issue is that he might not need it. It was strongly implied that he died because of the stress/poison caused weakness combination.

And even if he didn't get the death penalty, considering the circumstances, his body was already shutting down. He said so himself, he had to go in for constant "tune ups" just to keep himself barely living.

Now that he's lost all reason to seek revenge on Phoenix, ironically thanks to Phoenix himself, he finally can go in peace, so to speak.

Not to mention the game hints at him dying with that picture of him with Mia and Misty.

okay guys seriously, someone already asked you to put actual spoilers under a fucking spoiler tag. this is person #2 asking you, RELATIVELY POLITELY, to do the same. and considering I'M ACTUALLY PLAYING THE GAME RIGHT NOW, this makes this doubly relevant to me. i do not expect to come into the fanfic thread and find it balls-deep in spoilers for games i'm actually playing. thanks for ruining what's apparently going to be a major plot point, i really appreciate it.

i don't want to report someone for something as retarded as not putting spoilers under spoiler tags but seriously guys it's just common fucking sense.

[Wigmund]

Wow, there's been so many great fics written here since the last time I checked this thread.

It makes me feel bad that I haven't contributed anything in a while.

[Nexev]

SPOILER:


PHOENIX IS A LAWYER.

[Metaflare]

actually now that i think about it i'm prolly gonna have to put spoiler warnings in my future chapters because PLOT

[Embargo]

Ugh...
Warning, what you read below may be considered the worst writing ever conceived. You have been warned. No seriously, skip this over.

Untitled

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CURRENT unbalancedInertia [CUI] opened public transtimeline bulletin board TIMELESS
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~

[CUI] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board TIMELESS

CUI: I suppose this was inevitable, that I would finally make one of these.

CUI: Everyone else created their own memo boards, I guess it was so they could fool around whenever things seemed to calm down. I'm just going to use this to chronicle our history and comment on current events.

CUI: Despite there being nothing interesting in this side of reality to speak of, nor has there been anything interesting here since The Divide.

CUI: Upon entering this universe, my companions and I set upon the task of finding a suitable world to colonize and settle. The universe was too new to find anything that even resembled a planet. Finding someplace to settle became an impossibility.

CUI: We began creating the first habitable garden world in existence from scratch. Our combined power, along with the advanced technology we had available to us, allowed us to terraform the rocky, barren, wasteland into what we called "Haven". A decade later and we already had the makings of civilization. We built a micro-city of machines and began preparing for the Ritual of Rebirth. Everything was going along swimmingly.

CUI: But good things never last, as I soon learned. Everyone began arguing over stupid ideals and useless values, of how we would go about shaping the universe as gods. Ideologies were tossed around, and eventually we found ourselves unable to coexist. The two sides that emerged were those who wanted to subtly influence the universe into "the right direction"(The Fauns) and those who wanted to wash their hands of any responsibility they had over their new creation (The Fae).

CUI: Eventually we split up and went our separate ways, which didn't bode well for the propagation of our species. The Ritual requires everyone to donate their genetic material, and with everyone split over pointless issues...

CUI: But separation wasn't enough for us. The need to repopulate went side by side with our idealogical battle. Both sides tried to capture the other, but none succeeded. Our machines were destroyed in the conflict, along with our will to fight. Time withered us away into husks of our former selves until we just dropped dead.

CUI: One by one, everyone around me died. The war had taken not just their will to fight, but their will to live as well. We were tired, exhausted, and utterly drained from our experiences with The Game and our subsequent time in this fledgling universe.

CUI: I, alone, was left to carry on their-

CUI: Our, legacy. I suppose its fitting that I was chosen, despite it being completely unfair.

CUI: For now, I live a relatively productive life. I've already started rebuilding all the machines that were destroyed. Sometimes I just whittle away the hours contemplating on my species' history ever since we first began playing The Game.

CUI: Let me just say this: The sheer amount of time and effort it took me to learn how to build computers, use basic code, learn concepts about time and space that were completely alien to me, and do it all by myself without any help whatsoever was astronomical.

CUI: But I learned eventually. For now, we'll leave eventually as a number far too large for my tastes.

CUI: Something strange I've encountered, however, is that I can't seem to connect to the universe I left behind. Perhaps its a result of The Game denying me the chance to correct past mistakes?

CUI: Maybe its simply because we broke away from that reality when we crossed into this one. I don't know. Space/Time wasn't my strong suit. I know- knew, the one person who did understand this better than anyone. So I suppose our conversations with each other helped prepare me for this sort of thing.

CUI: Despite all these short comings I've faced, I'm happy to announce to myself that I can now converse with myself, depending on where on the timeline I'm currently positioned.

CUI: Its a pathetic state of affairs, being forced to talk to myself out of sheer boredom, but It's better than just sitting around and doing nothing for the rest of eternity.

CUI: ...

CUI: I miss them so much.

CUI: I miss them and it hurts. I want this nightmare to be over. I don't want this responsibility anymore.

CUI: I envy the dead. I don't know why I'm still alive, especially when all of this is a lost cause. I'm the last of my kind.

CUI: What a waste.

FUTURE acceleratedArdor [FAA] ??? AGO responded to memo.

FAA: Wha7 7he fuck 15 7h15 5h1t?

FAA: Wha7 am 1 even read1n9 here?

CUI: ... Your not me. Its impossible that anyone other than me would contact me like this.

CUI: Unless I'm trolling myself from the future, but I wouldn't do that. I'm not that much of a tool.

CUI: How'd you even find this memo.

CUI: Your not even supposed to have the kind of technology to contact me through this medium.

CUI: I'm so confused.

CUI: ...

CUI: Are you even there?

CUI: Hello?

FAA: 5orry, 1 wa5 jus7 wad1ng 7hrough all th1s fa1l you've 9ot runn1ng here.

FAA: lrn2code, fucka55.

FAA: 1 mean, how 5tup1d-

[FAA] Has disconnected from memo.

CUI: Shit.

CUI: I've got to find out how this happened.

CUI: Somehow, somewhere, someone is contacting me. I didn't expect intelligent life to blossom so soon.

CUI: How long has it been anyway? More than a few billion years, at least. I've got to be absolutely ancient. I wouldn't even know, anymore. I haven't seen my own face in at least 4 Billion years, give or take a few hundred million.

CUI: ...

CUI: Why am I still talking to myself?

FUTURE unbalancedInertia [FUI] ??? FROM NOW responded to memo.

FUI: I agree.

FUI: Perhaps we should shut this down and save ourselves any further embarrassment?

CUI: I suppose. I've nothing to really add anway.

FUI ceased responding to memo.

CUI ceased responding to memo.

Comments on... whatever I just wrote.

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So yeah, I imagined a separate race preceding the Alternian Trolls and rolled with it.

It didn't turn out quite the way I planned and I got so tired of working on it... you know the rest. God, I forgot how much I suck. In any case, the intention wasn't to entertain in any way. I wrote this as an... introduction to something I plan on exploring later.

Another thing to consider is my relative inexperience in dealing with conversation in this format. It was sort of awkward, especially when it relies on having interesting characters. My characters were just introduced and very little is actually known about them, other than what you can infer from the story.

I forogot the point I was making.

Oh yeah, I remember. "Lrn2ritefanfiction" was the moral of the story.

[apocalypticCritic]

Kinda difficult to read. Consider making it a brighter color and spacing sentences out a little more. Huge clusters of light colored text is really hard on the eyes.

[Kerensky287]

I guess in the future I'll try harder to give constructive criticism rather than blind praise/etc (except to myself). I've tried to say something constructive about every fic I reviewed, but a lot of the time I feel like I can't say exactly WHY I like or don't like something, and even when I do know why or why not, it's often something subjective (like the way I'm not partial to fantrolls or exiles, but I love blood/guardian swaps and sburb crossovers). I'll also try harder to keep my criticism related to the writing itself, rather than fanfic pitfalls like "That's not how Eridan's quirk works."

So, sorry I'm criticising without having any proper qualifications whatsoever to be a critic. I'll keep trying, though, and hopefully it'll improve my own writing as a result!

If I don't get caught up by Friday I'll probably take that day off because 1) Sburb Fortress chapter 4 is ugly as sin and I really want to edit it and 2) I had an idea for an Aradia Megido/Ghost Trick story that I want to put on paper before it gets out of hand.

Anyway, onward.

Page 62

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Untitled Sollux Fic by Sionnan:
-Hurray backstory, some retroactive setup for Sollux/Feferi! Umm, criticisms... well, there were some awkward wordings - "his collar to his ears in repercussion from the endorphin high" - but that's about all I can find. Sorry, I'm bad at this. I should just go back to blind praise for the next round of criticisms.

Sunken Ships by Wigmund:
-The mental image of Karkat and Dave walking down the street slapfighting each other is just priceless, and the story itself is hilarious. Criticisms.... uh... fuck. Let's go with "It's not long enough."

The Survivor Chapter 3 by Tybian Sothoth:
-Thank you for fixing the white text. I mean yeah it's loyal to the source material, and yeah I was being nitpicky and cranky when I complained about it, but it reads much better now. Awesome choice starting with the 2 least-fleshed-out characters, as well. Yup, I'm officially enjoying this now that it's gotten on its way. I'm gonna hold off on more criticisms until I can review the most recent chapter because I want to try and get a handle on what works and doesn't work in this story - I don't want to say "fix this" when later on it turns out to be beneficial.

Indystuck chapter 15 by Graven_Image:
-I decided to respond this time to Indystuck because I wanted to actually try criticising it but the only thing I can think of saying is that I like Tim too much and that's totally subjective. I mean honestly, a conversation starts with somebody like Meat Boy and I go alright, cool, I'll read this, and then Tim shows up and I go YES TIM FUCKIN' EH. He almost overshadows the other characters for me. Almost. But that isn't fair criticism.

Page 63

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{mostly roleplaying talk but also...}

Windows chapter 12 by Tenebrais:
-Another story I have to read in its entirety before I can say anything. Once I catch up I'll read Homekrieg and Windows, devote a single post just to them (and whatever else I need to reread), and then go on my merry way. Sorry!

Page 64

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{more roleplaying talk but also...}

My Despised by Wigmund:
-I know this was posted in the trollcops thread but you linked it here, so I'm gonna say it counts for the purposes of Comprehensive Judgments. I love competent!Tavros. Quite the magnificent bastard. And you did a good job of spelling out kismessitude as something people can actually understand... and I guess some people might be able to relate to. Criticism: your story reminds me of the new Batman movies, and that reminds me of how Heath Ledger won't be able to play Joker anymore, and that makes me very sad.

Sburb Fortress Chapter 4 by Kerensky287
-I didn't even read past the first sentence, you're a garbage writer. Criticisms include your total suckage. Edit this fucker already wow it's been almost 3 whole days.

Page 65

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Untitled update-relevant shenanigans by raequiem:
-Any day in which Rae posts a fic is a good day in my books. January 16th was an exception because Sburb Fortress Chapter 4 was also posted in that day and it overwrites it to make it a bad day, but Rae's fic almost made it alright. Especially because it's a happy celebration of boring robot Aradia turning into kickass time-hero Aradia. Criticisms include the fact that it probably isn't going to happen in canon - Aradia mentioned Sollux would never see her again, "not with [his] eyes, at least" - and so it makes me depressed.

Purgatory by Graven_Image:
-Revengefics ahoy! I would dock most fics marks for powering up the protagonists while leaving the antagonists untouched, but this is a hilarious revenge fantasy - one, I might add, that I'm sure everyone in this forum has had.

Untitled soon-to-be-AU sadfic by draconicAlgorithm:
-The best part about this is that Terezi is one of the only characters (aside from maaaybe Aradia and John at this point) who actually COULD make Vriska pay. And Terezi's method would be more interesting because she'd go all Xanatos about it. What's that, Vriska? You have godpowers? Terezi's still way, way smarter than you. Have fun with that. Criticism includes insufficient use of the word "pillweef." For shaaaaame.

{More Survivor from Tybian Sothoth but I said I'd put comments on hold for now.}

Insignificant by KarneWarrior:
-I guess people were really hating Vriska right at this point in time because it's another revenge fic! Less violent and hilarious this time, more short, sweet and thought-out. I'm a little confused though - it looked to me like Lord English did that to her, but your notes say "I don't know how Aradia would do that." So did Aradia help LE or something?

I was gonna do page 66 too but wow there are a lot of fics on that page. I'll get to it tomorrow morning.

[Wigmund]

Sunken Ships by Wigmund:
-The mental image of Karkat and Dave walking down the street slapfighting each other is just priceless, and the story itself is hilarious. Criticisms.... uh... fuck. Let's go with "It's not long enough."

If it was any longer I wouldn't be able to post a link to it here

[Embargo]

Kinda difficult to read. Consider making it a brighter color and spacing sentences out a little more. Huge clusters of light colored text is really hard on the eyes.

Spaced'em out more. Thanks for that.

[apocalypticCritic]

As it was now easier to read, I gotta say, pretty interesting. Consider expanding the story.

[linguisticDoctor]

All right time to make some more words go. FIRST THOUGH:

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Kassiopeia: your Jack fic was the best one I have ever read now I feel sorry for Jack Noir dang it. Also thank you for the compliment, it is a big one. :O

I also would like to see Vriska redeem herself. She's...well my feelings for her oscillate between love for her completely bombastic personality and badassness and hate for her general pseudo-sociopathy and I don't even know.

egregiousBass: You have an excellent and interesting idea there, though I do think Vriska is too young and too shallow to really be cognizant of her actions' greater effects. And both you and Kassiopeia have inspired me to try my hand at writing a Vriska POV thingy! But first...this thing. ALSO, I loved your Sophocles crossover.

Doodled: Thank you!

Kawa: Hilariously, I kind of felt bad doing that to her, but at the same time I loved the stream of 8's.

And now...

Auld Lang Syne

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OPEN PESTERLOG

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GA: You
GA: You Answer Me Right Now
GA: I Know For A Fact You Can See This, Guardian Mine
GA: I Have A Matter To Discuss With You
GA: And I Am Very Upset
GA: Do You Know What It Has To Do With
GA: You Really Should
GA: It Has To Do With The Fact That Tavros Is Irreparably Dead
GA: And Everyone Thinks That They Know Who Killed Him
GA: When In Reality Only I Do
GA: Damn You
GA: Answer Me
GA: I Know You're There Now Answer Me This Instant Or I Will Do Something Entirely Rash And Inadvisable In My Overwhelming Anger
Hello, Kanaya.
I'm sorry for the delay.
GA: Oh I'm Sure
GA: The Sincerity Of Your Apology Is Overwhelming
GA: It Is Like A Buffeting Wind In An Ancient Ship's Sails
Such sarcasm! You've grown quite the biting wit.
GA: I Have Been Learning From The Very Best
My dear girl. How I wish we were communicating under better circumstances.
I don't think you know how very proud I am of you.
You are such a remarkable young woman.
GA: I Wish I Could Believe That You Meant That
GA: I Also Wish We Were Communicating Under Better Circumstances
GA: I Wish I Had Not Discovered Your Communion With Vriska
GA: Or That You Have Had Your Hands In This From The Very Beginning
GA: I Wish I Had Not Discovered How Unfathomably Cruel You Are
I'm hurt, Kanaya. And somewhat offended.
I would have thought you, of all people, would understand that I am not simply cruel.
I have never once acted with malice.
And you know, from your own memories, that with you I was never cruel.
GA: I Was Inferring That Your Kindness Towards Me Was Some Sort Of Masquerade
GA: I Thought That Came Across
It did. I am emphatically denying it.
I care very much for you, Kanaya. You are the only sentient being in all of my existence who has stirred such a feeling in me.
I will miss you, when the time of ending comes.
I also suppose I must take into account that Ms. Serket did leave quite the emotional scar on you--which I stress was not my intention--so perhaps you are projecting, and you do not mean to be cruel yourself.
GA: Argh
GA: Leave That Out Of This
GA: Vriska Never Would Have Become As She Is Without You Pushing Her Anyway
GA: Perhaps She Still Would Have Been Dangerous
GA: But Not
GA: Like This
GA: She Would Never Have Killed Him
GA: Which Was My Original Point
You seem very sure of that.
And as it happens, you are right.
But if I had not sent her in the direction of her destiny, you and all your friends would be irrevocably doomed. Trollkind would be extinct.
Just as I carefully sent you in the direction of yours.
Just as young Mr. Nitram has reached the end of his path, and Ms. Megido has returned at last to hers.
Which is my point.
I have never done more than what must be done.
I showed you my kindness, because you needed it to grow.
I showed Ms. Serket my cruelty, because she would find it easy to accept.
It is as I always told you, my dear.
GA: 'Each Dark Pocket Must In Time Be Filled'
GA: I Recall That
GA: I Did Not Admittedly Grasp The Significance At The Time
Of course not. You weren't meant to.
You were only ever supposed to realize it now.
GA: And What About Rose
GA: Are You Sending Her To Her End As Well
GA: Is That What You've Done
GA: That's Why I Can't See Her Isn't It
No, no, my dear!
In point of fact, the Seer is helping send me towards mine.
It is quite exciting, I must say. The first real excitement I've felt in millennia. It's been so long since I got to actively participate in my own plans, rather than watch them unfold.
GA: Argh Argh Argh
GA: You Are As Frustrating As Ever
GA: Understand This
GA: I Am Not Going To Let You Doom Us
GA: I Do Not Care About Your Plan
GA: I Do Not Care About Your Destiny Paths And Pockets And Whatnot
GA: We Have Come Too Far To Be Stopped Now
GA: We Have All Suffered Enough
GA: We Are Going To Survive And We Are Going To Meet The Humans And We Are All Going To Win This Stupid Game And If I Have To Cut You Down Myself We Will Accomplish This
GA: I Hope You Realize My Sincerity
Of course I do, my dear. You really shouldn't doubt your distinctions. Perhaps that's Rose's influence. I'll ask her to go easier on you.
And I would gladly accept your challenge.
But there is one fallacy herein.
Whoever said I did not want you and your friends to win?
GA:Wait
GA: What
Heh.
Goodbye, Kanaya. I hope we talk again before the end.
It's not likely, but as you prove...
Nothing is impossible.
GA: Oh No You Don't
GA: No
GA: No No No
GA: Come Back Here
GA: Damn It Come Back
GA: You Are The Most Frustrating Entity In Any Universe Or Beyond Them
GA: Aaaaaaaargh
GA: Bad Doctor, Worst Guardian

[Rimbaum]

Auld Lang Syne

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OPEN PESTERLOG

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GA: You
GA: You Answer Me Right Now
GA: I Know For A Fact You Can See This, Guardian Mine
GA: I Have A Matter To Discuss With You
GA: And I Am Very Upset
GA: Do You Know What It Has To Do With
GA: You Really Should
GA: It Has To Do With The Fact That Tavros Is Irreparably Dead
GA: And Everyone Thinks That They Know Who Killed Him
GA: When In Reality Only I Do
GA: Damn You
GA: Answer Me
GA: I Know You're There Now Answer Me This Instant Or I Will Do Something Entirely Rash And Inadvisable In My Overwhelming Anger
Hello, Kanaya.
I'm sorry for the delay.
GA: Oh I'm Sure
GA: The Sincerity Of Your Apology Is Overwhelming
GA: It Is Like A Buffeting Wind In An Ancient Ship's Sails
Such sarcasm! You've grown quite the biting wit.
GA: I Have Been Learning From The Very Best
My dear girl. How I wish we were communicating under better circumstances.
I don't think you know how very proud I am of you.
You are such a remarkable young woman.
GA: I Wish I Could Believe That You Meant That
GA: I Also Wish We Were Communicating Under Better Circumstances
GA: I Wish I Had Not Discovered Your Communion With Vriska
GA: Or That You Have Had Your Hands In This From The Very Beginning
GA: I Wish I Had Not Discovered How Unfathomably Cruel You Are
I'm hurt, Kanaya. And somewhat offended.
I would have thought you, of all people, would understand that I am not simply cruel.
I have never once acted with malice.
And you know, from your own memories, that with you I was never cruel.
GA: I Was Inferring That Your Kindness Towards Me Was Some Sort Of Masquerade
GA: I Thought That Came Across
It did. I am emphatically denying it.
I care very much for you, Kanaya. You are the only sentient being in all of my existence who has stirred such a feeling in me.
I will miss you, when the time of ending comes.
I also suppose I must take into account that Ms. Serket did leave quite the emotional scar on you--which I stress was not my intention--so perhaps you are projecting, and you do not mean to be cruel yourself.
GA: Argh
GA: Leave That Out Of This
GA: Vriska Never Would Have Become As She Is Without You Pushing Her Anyway
GA: Perhaps She Still Would Have Been Dangerous
GA: But Not
GA: Like This
GA: She Would Never Have Killed Him
GA: Which Was My Original Point
You seem very sure of that.
And as it happens, you are right.
But if I had not sent her in the direction of her destiny, you and all your friends would be irrevocably doomed. Trollkind would be extinct.
Just as I carefully sent you in the direction of yours.
Just as young Mr. Nitram has reached the end of his path, and Ms. Megido has returned at last to hers.
Which is my point.
I have never done more than what must be done.
I showed you my kindness, because you needed it to grow.
I showed Ms. Serket my cruelty, because she would find it easy to accept.
It is as I always told you, my dear.
GA: 'Each Dark Pocket Must In Time Be Filled'
GA: I Recall That
GA: I Did Not Admittedly Grasp The Significance At The Time
Of course not. You weren't meant to.
You were only ever supposed to realize it now.
GA: And What About Rose
GA: Are You Sending Her To Her End As Well
GA: Is That What You've Done
GA: That's Why I Can't See Her Isn't It
No, no, my dear!
In point of fact, the Seer is helping send me towards mine.
It is quite exciting, I must say. The first real excitement I've felt in millennia. It's been so long since I got to actively participate in my own plans, rather than watch them unfold.
GA: Argh Argh Argh
GA: You Are As Frustrating As Ever
GA: Understand This
GA: I Am Not Going To Let You Doom Us
GA: I Do Not Care About Your Plan
GA: I Do Not Care About Your Destiny Paths And Pockets And Whatnot
GA: We Have Come Too Far To Be Stopped Now
GA: We Have All Suffered Enough
GA: We Are Going To Survive And We Are Going To Meet The Humans And We Are All Going To Win This Stupid Game And If I Have To Cut You Down Myself We Will Accomplish This
GA: I Hope You Realize My Sincerity
Of course I do, my dear. You really shouldn't doubt your distinctions. Perhaps that's Rose's influence. I'll ask her to go easier on you.
And I would gladly accept your challenge.
But there is one fallacy herein.
Whoever said I did not want you and your friends to win?
GA:Wait
GA: What
Heh.
Goodbye, Kanaya. I hope we talk again before the end.
It's not likely, but as you prove...
Nothing is impossible.
GA: Oh No You Don't
GA: No
GA: No No No
GA: Come Back Here
GA: Damn It Come Back
GA: You Are The Most Frustrating Entity In Any Universe Or Beyond Them
GA: Aaaaaaaargh
GA: Bad Doctor, Worst Guardian

That is... :O omg, I got the most awe-inducing sense of an estranged father/daughter relationship there. Maybe it wasn't what you were going for, but... it brought out some very personal memories and emotions along that front. I can totally relate to Kanaya here, and wtf I need a way to bookmark this as a favorite or something. Seriously. :O :O :O Wonderful job.

[egregiousBass]

^I concur. What does it have to do with Robert Burns, though?

[Sionnan]

Because I love Mr. Egbert.

Prayer of a Father

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I am your father and you are my son;
And I have much to pass down,
My wisdom hard-won.
Because I mark the day where
I know you'll become
a hero, a savior, the chosen one.
But the price for now is much too high,
So I'll bake you cakes, cookies and pies,
I'll pray you grow strong, pray you have pride,
pray that you listen to the voices inside.
But still in my heart, I pray the future is wrong.
You are my boy, and you don't belong
on a vast checkered field where our fate is hung
suspended between staggered black and white rungs.
There is one last thing, though my words are few
they are sparing and brief, but all the more true.
Just three simple words: I love you.

[egregiousBass]

Prayer of a Father

Suddenly I have the urge to use one of those ridiculous over-the-top emicons they have on DeviantArt.

Don't care much for poetry though so I can't comment on your wordsmithing .

[morpheoMancer]

Because I love Mr. Egbert.

Prayer of a Father

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hide spoiler

I am your father and you are my son;
And I have much to pass down,
My wisdom hard-won.
Because I mark the day where
I know you'll become
a hero, a savior, the chosen one.
But the price for now is much too high,
So I'll bake you cakes, cookies and pies,
I'll pray you grow strong, pray you have pride,
pray that you listen to the voices inside.
But still in my heart, I pray the future is wrong.
You are my boy, and you don't belong
on a vast checkered field where our fate is hung
suspended between black and white rungs.
There is one last thing, though my words are few
they are sparing and brief, but all the more true.
Just three simple words: I love you.

... brb, bawling eyes out.

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[Wigmund]

Because I love Mr. Egbert.

Prayer of a Father

show spoiler

hide spoiler

I am your father and you are my son;
And I have much to pass down,
My wisdom hard-won.
Because I mark the day where
I know you'll become
a hero, a savior, the chosen one.
But the price for now is much too high,
So I'll bake you cakes, cookies and pies,
I'll pray you grow strong, pray you have pride,
pray that you listen to the voices inside.
But still in my heart, I pray the future is wrong.
You are my boy, and you don't belong
on a vast checkered field where our fate is hung
suspended between black and white rungs.
There is one last thing, though my words are few
they are sparing and brief, but all the more true.
Just three simple words: I love you.

[SkaianRedeemer]

Argh, you guys have written like, twenty-five pages? Can't somebody get sick twice in one month during off-days? I don't have no idea what nones of you types is... none of... uh... okay, maybe I'm still too sick for this.

[egregiousBass]

It's ironic because I stopped keeping up with AHiHH because the chapters were so daunting.

HOW'S IT FEEL, HUH?

[SkaianRedeemer]

Pfft, I've done this before in Thread 3, just never with a blu in my frain. A flu in my thinkin'... A... I-I'll pull it off somehow.