Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Originally Posted by quantumCopycat
1. WHAT IS THIS
2. WHY IS IT SO GOOD
3. WHEN WILL YOU DO MORE
HFFFFFF
I'm glad you liked it! Hopefully there will be more soon.
Originally Posted by SkaianRedeemer
@Aerodactylus: 0_0 I am okay with this. I SUPER okay with this. Also, I realize it's probably a spoiler this early but your fic's overall title (yeah, I read your sig) might want to make an appearance at the top so people know it's part of the same thing. If not, make sure to include a message to that effect.
Why does Aradia have temporary quarters during the cleanup but still has her old quarters afterwards?
WHOO SKAIANREDEEMER LIKED MY FIC! ...Ahem. I'm...not sure what you mean about the overall title thing. I mean, I DID have a long fic I was working on in this universe, but I lost my mojo on it and I'm probably not going to finish it, hence why I took it out of my sig. I did make a new heading for these oneshots to go under, though. As for your query...whoops. The room Aradia goes back to are her temporary quarters. Sorry that that was unclear.
@Wigmund: That was adorable!
@aC and Dehgan: You guys are like the Stoll brothers of the fanfic thread. I'm loving this fic.
Last edited by Aerodactylus; 02-02-2011 at 11:16 AM.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
All right. I should warn you in advance, I don't know how much of this I'll ever actually write. I have an unfortunate tendency to get sidetracked from any project larger than a one-shot. But I put enough work into this that I think it might be worth posting all by itself.
We’re All Doomed
Chapter 1: (in which things get worse by getting better)
It all went wrong when Vriska decided not to put John to sleep.
It’s hard to say why she did so. Perhaps she felt a moment of doubt. Perhaps she thought that destiny might yet be changed. Perhaps she simply grew distracted. Most likely she simply made that decision because somewhere else she made a different one.
In any case, the doll dropped into the kernel.
Jack was the first to feel the brunt of Vriska’s decision, learning the hard way that the middle of a swordfight is not a good a good time or place to have your total number of arms and eyes reduced to zero. Even his amazing blue hair only kept his opponents at bay for seconds.
Jack Noir was dead.
And somewhere far away, The Knight Of Blood had something to say about it.
Open Pesterlogue:
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling ectoBiologist [EB] -- CG: WHAT DID YOU DO?!
EB: what?
CG: WHAT DID YOU FUCKING DO?!
EB: i don’t know. what did i do?
CG: JACK NOIR IS GONE, YOU UNBELIEAVABLE DUMBASS!
EB: oh cool.
CG: NO. NOT COOL. NOT FUCKING COOL AT ALL. JACK NOIR WAS SUPPOSED TO BE PROTOTYPED WITH JADE’S FREAK OF A LUSUS AND THEN GET SENT TO OUR WORLD AND KILL ALL OUR DREAM SELVES AND FLY AROUND A LOT WHILE WE HUDDLED IN THIS NOOKSUCKING METEOR.
EB: but now he’s gone.
CG: YES HE’S GONE. ONE SECOND HE’S FLYING AROUND AND THE NEXT SECOND HE’S NOT HERE AT ALL. BUT GUESS WHAT, FUCKASS?!
EB: what?
CG: WE’RE STILL IN THIS METEOR AND NOT RULING YOUR UNIVERSE LIKE WE FUCKING SHOULD BE. DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU DID?!
EB: no, tell me.
CG: YOU MADE THIS INTO A DOOMED TIMELINE, ASSHOLE.
CG: AND SOMEHOW YOU TOOK US WITH YOU.
CG: THAT MEANS WE WILL ALL DIE.
CG: ALL OF US.
CG: STUPID COOLKIDS
CG: PATHETIC NERDS
CG: AMAZING WARRIORS
CG: MURDEROUS BITCHES
CG: AND EVEN FUCKING STUPID CLOWNS.
CG: WE’RE ALL ABOARD THE GRIM REAPER EXPRESS, HEADING TO DEAD TOWN WITH NO STOPS AND YOU’RE THE FUCKING CONDUCTOR, PULLING THE FUCKING WHISTLE.
CG: CHOO CHOO!
EB: heh heh.
CG: OH GOD FUCKING DAMN IT.
CCG RIGHT NOW opened memo on board WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE.
CCG: EVERYONE GET YOUR ASSES IN HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
CCG: AND I MEAN EVERYONE.
CCG: PATHETIC EARTH HUMANS INCLUDED.
CCG: AND GET IN HERE FROM THE PRESENT MOMENT.
CCG: MAYBE WE CAN GET THROUGH JUST ONE NORMAL CONVERSATION WITHOUT DEGENERATING INTO A FUCKING CARNIVAL.
CCG: I GUESS IT MAKES AS GOOD A LAST WISH AS ANY.
CURRENT gallowsCalibrator [CGC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CGC: WH4T 1S TH1S 4LL 4BOUT, K4RK4T?
CCG: THIS IS ABOUT THE FACT THAT WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE HORRIBLY IS WHAT IT’S ABOUT.
CCG: LONG STORY SHORT, JOHN FUCKED UP AND PROTOTYPED WITH THE WRONG THING AND NOW WE’RE ALL DOOMED PARADOX CLONES.
CCG: I GUESS MAYBE THAT MAKES ANOTHER ARADIA TO ADD TO THE PILE OF DEAD ONES.
CURRENT apocalypseArisen [CAA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CAA: that was unkind
CCG: SHUT THE HELL UP.
CURRENT centaursTesticle [CCT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CCT: D --> You will not speak to Aradia in that manner.
CCG: YOU SHUT UP TOO, ASSHOLE.
CCG: ALL OF YOU STOP YOUR BLATHERING FOR ONE GODDAMN MINUTE AND FOCUS ON OUR IMPENDING DEMISE.
CCG: IS THAT SO HARD?
CURRENT terminallyCapricious [CTC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
PTC: I’m NoT MoThErFuCkInG FoLlOwInG AnY Of ThIs.
PTC: WeReN’t We AlReAdY MoThErFuCkInG DoOmEd?
CURRENT arachnidsGrip [CAG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CAG: Yeah!
CAG: Weren’t you always telling us how we were all doomed 8ecause John prototyped his kernel with the First Guardian?
CAG: And now you’re telling us we’re doomed 8ecause he didn’t?
CCG: IT’S NOT THE SAME FUCKING THING AND YOU KNOW IT, SERKET!
CCG: BEFORE WE WERE ONLY DOOMED BECAUSE THERE WAS AN UBEATABLE BOSS FLYING AROUND OUT THERE TRYING TO KILL US ALL.
CCG: BUT NOW WE’RE DOOMED ON AN EXISTENTIAL LEVEL.
CCG: WHICH IS LIKE TEN FUCKING TIMES MORE DOOMED.
CURRENT adiosToreador [CAT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CAT: uHHHH, mAYBE THIS ISN’T SO BAD,
CAA: n0 he is right
CAA: in the main timeline jack n0ir was pr0t0typed with the guardian
CAA: we are in a d00med 0ffsh00t
CAT: oH,
CCG: YEAH, oH. OH IS RIGHT. FINALLY SOMEONE FUCKING GETS IT.
CURRENT twinArmageddons [CTA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CTA: KK, ii thiink you need to relax.
CTA: even iif we are all doomed, you can’t expect us 2 2pend all our remaiiniing tiime freakiing out about how doomed we are.
CURRENT grimAuxiliatrix [CGA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CGA: Indeed Existential Threats Notwithstanding
CGA: In Purely Physical Terms We Are Now Safer Than We Have Been In A Long Time
CGA: I Believe This Calls For A Judicious Plan
CURRENT TentacleTherapist [CTT] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CTT: I was already creating a plan to subvert one destiny.
CTT: I suppose another will do just as well.
CCG: OH HEY LOOK WHO SHOWED UP.
CCG: IT’S THE SNARKY BROAD OF THE HUMAN PERSUASION.
CCG: AND NO, FOR THE RECORD, THAT IS NOT HOW WE’RE DOING THIS.
CCG: NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR MAKING PLANS.
CCG: NOW IS THE TIME FOR ASSIGNING BLAME.
CURRENT gardenGnostic [CGG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CGG: leave john alone!
CGG: he didn’t do anything wrong!!
CCG: OH AND NOW THE HUMANS ARE POPPING OUT OF THE WOODWORK.
CCG: THAT’S JUST GREAT.
CCG: YOU ALL CHOOSE NOW TO BE AVAILABLE AND NOT DISTRACTED BY SOMETHING OVERWHELMINGLY STUPID.
CURRENT ectoBiologist [CEB] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CEB: i still don’t understand what i did or didn’t do.
CCG: SHUT THE FUCK UP EGGBERT.
CAT: uHHHH, dIDN’T YOU JUST SAY IT WAS TIME FOR ASSIGNING BLAME,
CCG: YEAH, SO WHAT?
CAT: bUT HOW CAN WE ASSIGN BLAME TO HIM IF YOU DON’T TELL HIM WHAT HE DID WRONG,
CCG: THAT IS THE STUPIDEST THING I HAVE EVER HEARD.
CGC: NO, H3’S R1GHT. CR1M1N4LS H4V3 TO B3 1NFORM3D OF 4LL CH4RG3S L3V13D 4G41NST TH3M
CGC: SO TH4T TH3Y C4N F33L TH3 FULL FORC3 OF R1GHT3OUS JUST1C3.
CURRENT caligulasAquarium [CCA] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CCA: more importantly that is not wwhat wwe are doin right noww
CCA: kan had the right idea
CCA: i don’t care howw doomed wwe are
CCA: for the first time in wwho knowws howw long
CCA: i feel hope
CURRENT cuttlefishCuller [CCC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CCC: T)(at’s t)(e spirit ---ERIDAN! 38D
CCT: D --> I agree.
CCT: D --> To bend in the face of difficulty would be ine%cusable.
CCT: D --> We are STRONGER than that.
CCG: OKAY, NO. YOU SHUT UP ABOUT STRONGNESS, YOU FREAK.
CCC: -Equius, you are )(ereby ordered to keep talking about STRONGN---ESS.
CCT: D --> Yes, my Empress.
CCT: D --> But first I must go find a towel.
CCG: NO, SHE’S NOT YOUR LEADER.
CCG: SHE’S NOT THE BOSS OF YOU.
CCG: I AM THE BOSS OF YOU.
CCG: ACTUALLY, NEVER MIND. FORGET I SAID ANYTHING. JUST GO FIND YOUR TOWEL.
CCG: I HOPE YOU CHOKE ON IT.
CURRENT turntechGodhead [CTG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CTG: oh god this is so sad
CGA: I Am Quickly Becoming Skeptical Of This Conversations Continued Utility
CGA: As Such I Would Suggest We Abandon This Track Of Thought And Return Our Attention To The Making Of Plans
CURRENT arsenicCatnip [CAC] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CAC: :33 < *ac agr33s!*
CAC: :33 < *ac says that we can’t just give up*
CAT: i ALSO AGREE, aCTUALLY,
CAC: :33 < *ac would also like to take a moment to compliment tavros’s handle*
CAT: tHANKS,
CCG: OKAY, NO.
CCG: NONE OF YOU GET IT.
CCG: THERE CAN’T BE ANY PLANS.
CCG: WE ARE DOOMED.
CCG: DO ANY OF YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT THAT WORD MEANS?
CCG: BECAUSE IT DOESN’T MEAN ‘IN A PERFECTLY SALVAGEABLE SITUATION’.
CCG: DOOMED MEANS DOOMED.
CTG: eh i don’t buy it
CTG: we can still get out of this
CTG: after all we’ve got two kickass time masters over here
CURRENT turntechGodhead [CTG] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CTG: make that three
CCG: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS, FEATHERY ASSHOLE.
CCG: THIS DOES NOT CONCERN YOU.
CCG: YOU WERE ALREADY DOOMED.
CCG: SO I GUESS YOU ARE NOW DOUBLY DOOMED.
CCG: THAT IS SUCH A PREPOSTEROUS DEGREE OF DOOMED I’M SURPRISED YOU AREN’T BEING SQUISHED BY A FALLING SAFE AT THIS EXACT MOMENT.
CCG: OKAY, SINCE NONE OF YOU STILL GET IT, I AM MAKING A VOW RIGHT NOW THAT WHEN I INEVITABLY DIE, I WILL USE THE LAST OF MY STRENGTH TO CRAWL OVER TO A COMPUTER, LOG INTO THIS MEMO, AND TELL YOU ALL EXACTLY HOW LONG WE HAVE LEFT TO LIVE.
CCG: AND ALSO HOW STUPID YOU ALL ARE, I GUESS.
FUTURE apocalypseArisen [FAA] AT ?:?? responded to memo.
FAA: that is f0rbidden
FAA banned FCG from responding to memo.
CCG: AND NOW THAT IS ALSO HAPPENING I GUESS.
CCG: THAT’S JUST FUCKING GREAT.
CTT: So it is agreed then: we abandon fatalism in favor of planning.
CCG: NO THAT IS NOT AGREED NO-ONE HAS AGREED TO THAT.
CCT: D --> Am I too late to continue talking about STRONGNESS?
CCG: I HATE ALL OF YOU.
CCG closed memo.
Last edited by SeptimusMagistos; 02-03-2011 at 09:46 AM.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Thank you to everyone who said nice things about the Daddy!Droog fic!
@Skaian: Yeah, they're young adults, about 20 years/10 sweeps old. I've been hesitant to use time terms much (beyond "day") because of the issue of Alternia vs. Earth terminology, but then I went and used "Thursday" so OH WELL. Droog referring to Aradia as "his little girl" and Slick calling her "kid" are more terms of endearment, and also probably condescension in Slick's case :P
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
@Path: The next thing we know, the cast of Problem Sleuth suddenly finds themselves at the end of the comic, in mid-air, with no vehicle.
@Wigmund: Rainbow Drinker Kanaya is in-thread canon now, isn't it? Also, I've never seen any Nepeta/John! Have I? Well, okay, maybe. I'd like to see them talk, now.
@Aerodactylus: Yeah, I was referring to the "Space Pirates" thing.
Originally Posted by SeptimusMagistos
CCG: THAT IS SUCH A PREPOSTEROUS DEGREE OF DOOMED I’M SURPRISED YOU AREN’T BEING SQUISHED BY A FALLING SAFE AT THIS EXACT MOMENT.
That line really made me laugh, probably because it's something Sburb could really contrive. (Also, I had to fix up some formatting to make this quote work and it occurs to me to mention that you could just surround the entire pesterlog in one [B] tag and save yourself a lot of trouble!)
@Miss Prince: I figured that was the case, it was actually Aradia living with Droog without, say, an apparent job that was making me wonder (of course, it is the pseudo-thirties, so even that's not necessarily the case and you can see where I got confused). It was easiest to just roll with the original fanart but since Aradia is a robot in the fanart...
Last edited by SkaianRedeemer; 02-02-2011 at 12:20 PM.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Page 77
Doll by draconicAlgorithm
*Creeeeeeepy. Creepycreepycreepy.
+I like these kinds of "hypothetical" fics.
*If you're into creeeeeeeeeeeepyfics then this is a good one.
Survivor ch12 by Tybian Sothoth
+I like the character you're building up. It seems totally in keeping with his personality that he'd accidentally roleplay.
*"FUUUUUUUUUUUC-HRK!!!"? Was he roleplaying the uh, getting hanged part? Because that's even better. Reminds me of the Brain Control scene in Dinner For Schmucks.
"Fuck it it's untitled" by Embargo
*Geez people, think of titles! It takes like two seconds. If you have to, just go the over-artistic route and name it something like "Silver petals in rain" or another nonsequitur.
?+Troll guardians? Am I interpreting this right?
*BO is obviously Bro, but who's CC?
Indystuck 20 by Graven_Image
+It's Indystuck!
+Tim.
=-SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS S
Maternal Blues by Wigmund
+Puns usually grate on me but this title is just appropriate on so many levels.
=-STOP MAKING ME LIKE CHARACTERS I HATE
+But seriously this makes me like Vriska too much.
Page 78
Try Again by Domoz (or is it *Ahem*? I don't even know)
=-CANONBAAAAAANNED. ZERO OF THE CHARACTERS IN THIS FIC ARE ALIVE ANYMORE.
*Not a whole lot here, I can't say much about it. Maybe I will when I come across another chapter.
Candlelight and Clockwork by PingZing
*Fun fact, the reason people got colds more frequently in the winter wasn't because of the temperature, it was because everyone was always gathered together in a single house. Disease spreads more quickly in those kinds of conditions. When kids were playing outside they'd be farther apart, resulting in a lower risk of contamination.
+I really love John's dialog here. Looking forward to more.
Page 79
A Hand in Holding Hands 11a+b by SkaianRedeemer
*I'm reviewing this by memory because it saves time!
+Excellent exploration of troll relationships.
+Excellent characterization.
+Bucketkind.
=-You don't write often enough.
A New Sense of Strong by Crimson Lunar
=-Feferi is the village bicycle.
=-UUUUGH WORST CRACKSHIP, HOW COULD YOU EVER
-I would actually recommend the use of a few more commas. Some of your sentences feel a little... well, not run-on, but... I don't know how to describe it. They need the pauses that commas indicate.
*Crackships aren't really my thing and Equius is still probably my least favourite character (if you take apathy into account).
+I can SORT OF see where you got this idea from though. Feferi does seem to have a bit of a short fuse when it comes to relationships, so I wouldn't be surprised about the whole "Dumping Sollux" thing (except for the events of the most recent flash)
Sburb Fortress by Me
-Not gonna bother.
-WORST AUTHOR AAAAAAGH
-SHOULD BE INCARCERATED FOR BAD WRITING
Dead (part7 of mysteryfic) by Doodled
*This also needs a title.
-"Eridan, slowly, began to... RUN AWAY AS FAST AS HE FUCKING COULD!!!" Not sure if the change in text size/boldness was necessary. It breaks the flow a little.
?? Wouldn't Gamzee know who the killer was? Considering that he, y'know, survived?
+I like the suspense you've got building up in this story.
-That said, if it isn't actually the ending, putting a false conclusion at the end of a chapter is a little bit of a weird thing to do.
Delay by Summergale
+I love seeing alive!aradia.
+Short but sweet.
HOMESTUCK A GAME TO END ALL GAMES BY KARNEWARRIOR
=+NO KARNE, YOU ARE THE CRITICISM
=-And then Karne was a zombie.
Page 79
Homestuck Repercussions of SBURB by DeadBrain
?-*=+WEPON
Doodled's still-untitled mystery fic part 8 by Doodled
-"Hided" (h1d3d) isn't a word. "Hid" or "Had hidden" is more grammatically correct.
+Nepeta's killing people to UPDATE HER SHIPPING WALL? Hell yes.
+WAIT WHAAAT, what a tweeeeest
-Oh, uh... untwisted. Okay.
-I realize that you're trying to make it unpredictable, but having twists/untwists/retwists in quick succession just tends to tire people out and/or bug the hell out of them. There's no satisfaction in a dramatic revelation that's undone within a paragraph.
*I really want to tell Andrew the above actually (replacing "paragraph" with "week") but whatever.
+I still like it, though. If you keep the twists twisted or quit doing the psyche-outs at all, it'll be excellent.
Survivor ch13 by Tybian Sothoth
+Vriska is a biiiiiiitch
?+Was Vriska inputting the commands all along? That'd be hilarious.
?-I mean, it'd be hard to believe. But still hilarious.
+This fic has totally hit its stride.
TIME
Also I finished page 79. Woohoo.
More tonight.
Proud owner of the most generic corns in the world:
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Because I both love Vriska AND think she needs a wake-up call, I give you:
Silent Spider
Prologue: Elsewhere
A young troll names Vriska Serket came to the realization that she didn't know where she was. It was an odd sensation, she felt like she had been walking a moment before, but from...and to where?
It actually looked like the images of earth she had seen when she watched the human players grow up. Beneath her feet was one of their trademark stone roads with the odd yellow line dividing the middle. To the left of the road a dense forest of pine erupted outward, and to the right the road fell away past the railing. Must be a steep drop.
She could not see much else, since a dense impenetrable fog hung everywhere. Honestly, she hadn't even known it could get this thick, the land was cast in an eternal gray.*Her first impulse was to turn back, and she almost yelled in surprise when she did.
"Wha? What happened to the road?" Vriska asked. It was a fair question. She may not be an expert on human roads, but she knew they weren't suppose to break off and drop straight down like that! "Geeze! I can't even see the bottom in this fog, or the other side for that matter."
Deciding she had gone through enough bullshit, Vriska decide to fire up her rocket boots, and...wait. Something was very wrong here.
A quick check showed her Strife Specubus and her Silendex were both gone! Not even empty, but outright gone! It was like she had never played SGRUB. A wave of fury filled the six sweep old troll. "All my gear, all of it! I've been robbed!" she exclaimed in her rage. "When I get my hands on the punk who stole my stuff, they will wish they had never been hatched!"
Then, a small thought appeared in her head. It was just a nervous suspicion, an utterly ridiculous thought, but it still sent a sense of dread through her. "I...I only lost my gear, right?" Deciding to check, she mentally summoned her God Wings.
...
Nothing
Nothing! All the levels were gone, all of them! The power to shape luck, the strength and power that was inherent to each hard earned level, even her Gog-given ability to manipulate others felt like it had left her! Now Vriska was starting to panic. You can't LOSE levels! That's against the entire game's system, no program or power the program held should be able to do that!
Unless...
"This is...something outside the game. This is something new." Vriska concluded. It made sense, some outside force had yanked her out of her session and removed everything the game had given her...and her mental powers as well. But to what end? Most of her value was in her gained strength. True she was still kind of awesome without all that, naturally, but if whatever brought her here could drain her power like this... "What do they NEED me for?"
Although she would not admit it, she was also worried HOW she would get her power back. Neither brute strength nor manipulation was open to her, not that it would do much good against someone who could take skills away like that. Perhaps she could make a deal?
"Well, I'm not going to progress any farther if I spend all day pondering, advance or abscond!" she concluded, and proceeded down the path away from the chasm in the road. One step at a time, first she needed to figure out just where this was. If it was earth, then it must have been some time in the past, but not many. The road and railing suggested it could not have been more then ten or twenty years in the past. But it could not be the present, too much worldwide devastation for such a silent...if unsettling, place to exist.
Vriska's thoughts were interrupted when on her right, elevated to be visible was a sign. Clearly welcoming people to a town that must be ahead. The troll knew that she should be happy to know more, if only a little, but...something about the words on the sign made her blue blood run cold...
WELCOME TO SILENT HILL
To be continued...
Last edited by Nox; 02-02-2011 at 01:15 PM.
Writing:
Bulletproof: Vriska is a lot more vulnerable and remorseful than anyone would suspect, she just doesn't let anyone see that. My Best Friends: Nepeta makes a sacrifice, and reflects on her life in her final moments. I Am Not Like You: The moment when you can no longer hide from your own sins is always painful. Vriska learns this when Eriden becomes her mirror.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Originally Posted by Wigmund
The latest update inspired me. The Prophetic Diagram
Open Pesterlog
-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] --
GG: hey karkat, are you there?
GG: come on, answer me fuckass. >:B
CG: OHGODOHGODOHGOD WHAT NOW?
GG: PASSWORD FUCKASS!
CG: FUCK THAT JADE, I'M BUSY RUNNING FOR MY LIFE!
GG: don't try to avoid me karkat. don't try to avoid my PASSWORDS either fuckass!
CG: NO, I'M BEING SERIOUS. ERIDAN AND GAMZEE HAVE FLIPPED THEIR FUCKING LIDS, ERIDAN'S KILLED FEFERI AND KANAYA. GAMZEE IS HUNTING ME DOWN!
GG: ...
GG: well, i guess that explains why feferi claimed she was dead in my dream bubble...
CG: WHAT.
GG: but kanaya? i'm sorry karkat. i'm really sorry about that.
CG: I UNDERSTAND, BUT I REALLY DOESN'T MATTER - SHE GOT BETTER.
GG: better?
CG: WELL, SORTA. SHE'S A RAINBOW DRINKER NOW. KEEPS TRYING TO DRINK MY BLOOD. IT'S GETTING ANNOYING.
GG: hehehe
CG: YEAH, BUT I'M STILL FLIPPING MY SHIT OVER GAMZEE HUNTING ME DOWN.
GG: well, sounds like you have a guardian now and it looks like this gamzee is in a completely different part of your asteroid.
CG: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?
GG: i have my ways ;B
CG: OKAY, I GUESS I CAN CALM DOWN FOR A BIT AND FIND OUT WHAT YOU WANT.
CG: WAIT A MOMENT, WHEN DID YOU START USING THAT BUCKTOOTHED EMOTICON? I THOUGHT YOU HATED THAT.
GG: well, i did...
GG: but then i started chatting with you so much and it just grew on me.
GG: kinda like this thing: PASSWORD FUCKASS!
CG: OH GOG DAMMIT JADE! I DON'T KNOW THE FUCKING PASSWORD!
GG: good, because the current password is:
GG: SHOW ME THIS SHIPPING WALL YOU DREW FOR JOHN AND DAVE!
CG: oh fuck
GG: >:B
CG: WHO THE FUCK TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT STUPID THING?
GG: john did. he mentioned that you drew something that said he had to marry rose and that i had to marry dave.
GG: so i decided that i just had to take a good hard look at this prophetic diagram.
CG: UH...I NEED TO GO FIND IT, HOLD ON.
GG: hurry up you idiot.
CG: I'M SORRY, IT LOOKS LIKE I DELETED IT AFTER I SENT IT TO THOSE TWO FUCKING IDIOTS.
GG: good.
CG: YEAH, IT WAS A SHITTY DRAWING ANYWAYS. I CAN'T DRAW AT ALL. NEPETA HAS THE CRAZY ASS SHIPPING WALL DOODLING TALENTS.
GG: nepeta?
CG: THE ONE WHO ACTS LIKE A CAT AND USES PUNS AND THE STUPID FUCKING :33 FACES.
GG: oh her, i liked chatting with her. she's silly and i liked roleplaying with her.
CG: OH GOG, NOT ANOTHER ONE. ):<B WHY IS IT ALL THE GIRLS THAT I HAVE LIKED OR LIKE ME, LIKE ROLEPLAYING?
GG: :o
CG: OH FUCK, I DIDN'T MEAN TO TYPE THAT. JUST IGNORE IT.
GG: nope, too late.
CG: SHITSHITFUCKSHITGOGFUCKINGDAMMITSHITFUCK
GG: :B
CG: WAIT A MOMENT, YOU SAID 'GOOD' EARLIER WHEN I SAID I DELETED THE STUPID SHIPPING CHART. WHAT DID YOU MEAN BY THAT?
GG: ...
CG: GOOD, AS IN 'IT'S A GOOD THING I DELETED SUCH A SHITTY PICTURE'?
GG: ...
CG: OR IS IT, 'GOOD, NOW I DON'T HAVE TO MARRY THAT STUPID SMUG DOUCHE AND CAN CHASE SOMEONE ELSE'?
GG: i think i need to go karkat.
CG: NO, PLEASE DON'T. YOU'VE DISTRACTED ME FROM THE PSYCHO CLOWN AND THE GIRL WHO CURRENTLY TRYING TO SUCK ON MY NECK.
GG: 8O oh noooooo
GG: alright, i won't leave and yes.
CG: YES? YES WHAT?
GG: yes to the second rational for 'good'.
CG: WHAT...I...OH MY...
GG: exactly.
CG: JADE, I THINK WE'LL NEED TO TALK MORE WHEN WE MEET FACE-TO-FACE. THAT IS IF I SURVIVE ALL OF THIS.
GG: don't worry, one way or another, we'll meet up. i believe that.
GG: i'm sorry, but i have to go. someone else is trying to pester me.
CG: WELL THEN, I'LL HOPEFULLY TALK TO YOU LATER.
GG: see ya karkat
"You Have Gotten Yourself Into What Is Obviously A Very Cute Relationship With Jade," Kanaya whispered into Karkat's ear as she draped herself over his shoulders. She started to nuzzle into his neck, but he batted her off.
"A relationship? With Jade?" Karkat continued to stare at the pesterlog. Especially that green heart that Jade left for him at the end of the document. A small smile creeped onto his face.
"Well That Is Certainly Something I Have Not Seen Before."
"What?"
Kanaya smiled at Karkat and hugged him, "A Genuine Smile On Your Face. It Makes Me Feel So Happy For You."
Karkat leaned into the hug and enjoyed it. It was great that Kanaya was up and moving again, even if she constantly wanted to get at his blood. Small price to pay for having his friend back.
"Well, shit."
"What Is It?"
"We've got ourselves a whole bunch of human/troll relationships here Kanaya. Dave and Terezi, Jade and myself, You and Rose."
Kanaya blushed and pulled herself away from Karkat.
"Rose And Myself? But I Happen To Be-"
"A Rainbow Drinker, yeah I know. But I imagine if you tried to contact her now, you'd be able to and I really doubt she'd care if you are now undead."
Karkat leaned back in his chair, staring at the walls beyond his monitor, "In fact, the way she acts, I think she'd find it even more appealing."
Kanaya was pacing around the lab, but stopped when Karkat said that and smiled. Then she got a faraway look and turned back to her new moirail, "What About The Human John? There Is Not Much Of A Selection Of Trolls Left Since He Says He Isn't Into Other Boys."
Karkat rubbed his chin, "Yeah, he was chatting up Vriska, but she's dropped off the face of the Incipishere. Feferi's dead and talking to Jade in the Furthest Ring. Who knows where Aradia went off to when she blew up, that just leaves..."
Karkat turned to Kanaya and they looked at each other and said the name of the last available female troll at the same time.
"Fuck, that means we need to get her up here so she'll be safe from Gamzee and Eridan."
"Do Not Worry About That Karkat, I Shall Go Retrieve Nepeta and Equius Since I Imagine They Are Hiding Together. Then We Can Motivate Her To Start Talking To John."
Kanaya got onto the teleportalizer and Karkat watched her disappear. He leaned back in his chair again, this time staring at the ceiling. Another smile creeped onto his face.
It was time to draw a new shipping diagram.
A/N:
That was silly, but I enjoyed writing it :3
I just realized it's been way too long since I spammed the Fanfic thread with my writings, I've been camped in the TrollCops thread instead.
Sorry about that
I can't believe no one's commented on this one yet. All of the characters sound in-character for the most part, and the rest of the time they're so cute I don't care :3 . You're turning me into a polyamorous shipper, Wigmund.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Originally Posted by Miss Prince
I finally have a chance to actually read Problem Sleuth.
YAY! Now you can join us in all the crack theories about how it's linked to Homestuck!
Writing:
Bulletproof: Vriska is a lot more vulnerable and remorseful than anyone would suspect, she just doesn't let anyone see that. My Best Friends: Nepeta makes a sacrifice, and reflects on her life in her final moments. I Am Not Like You: The moment when you can no longer hide from your own sins is always painful. Vriska learns this when Eriden becomes her mirror.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
@Skaian: Rainbow-drinking Kanaya forevers.
Originally Posted by Kerensky287
Maternal Blues by Wigmund
+Puns usually grate on me but this title is just appropriate on so many levels.
=-STOP MAKING ME LIKE CHARACTERS I HATE
+But seriously this makes me like Vriska too much.
Hopefully you haven't been reading my stuff in the TrollCops thread, Vriska's even more sympathetic there.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Kassie - Re: Hearts and Arrows That was incredibly sweet and I think Rainbow Drinker Kanaya is probably one my favorite bits of fanon now. That final line was hilarious too =P
Re: Vindicatrix Pt. 3 - Yep, Eridan was in way over his head the moment he showed up, wasn't he? Leaving an opponent maimed and alone with their guilt does seem a very Rose-like thing to do though. I enjoyed it.
Miss Prince - I don't think I responded to part 1, but I really enjoyed it as well. You nailed the Aradia-Droog relationship, or at least how I picture it. Droog being a protective father though...awesome, in his own way. And Droog bringing Aradia along? Pardon me while I go hum the first few seconds of "Black"...
Aerodactylus - Whoa. Thassa lotta worldbuilding right there. I enjoyed it! The inter-class conflicts based on zodiac symbol and its related ideology was an interesting idea. The canon characters you used were nicely in character; I cannot help but love picturing Gamzee as the loud, drunken-but-competent(?) butler.
arcaneCalligrammancer & Dehgan - Ahaha, I was grinning the entire time I read this. The line “Shit, let’s just be a hemoglobin exchequer.”? Awesome. And Kanaya's final descent into melodrama at the end there had me snickering something fierce.
Originally Posted by Kerensky287
Candlelight and Clockwork by PingZing
*Fun fact, the reason people got colds more frequently in the winter wasn't because of the temperature, it was because everyone was always gathered together in a single house. Disease spreads more quickly in those kinds of conditions. When kids were playing outside they'd be farther apart, resulting in a lower risk of contamination. +I really love John's dialog here. Looking forward to more.
Heh, funny that you bring that up; I actually looked that up online because I knew something like that was true. But I'd already had the dialogue written by that point, and didn't think it was worth scrapping in favor of factual accuracy about the genesis of colds. The closest I get to acknowledging it is Rose's bit of dialogue. Otherwise, I'm just going to sort of pretend they're only thirteen and don't know any better =P
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Amen to that, we all seem to be rooting for Rainbow Drinker Kanaya. I made a fic of it myself, but I didn't think it was of acceptable quality, so I'm gonna wait on it and polish it up, then perhaps post it when everyone isn't doing it at once.
@Wigmund: Love the Karkat/Jade, even if it's not my preferred paring. I also enjoy the casual version of Rainbow Drinker Kanaya, very funny.
@SeptimusMagistos: I'm gonna sing the doom song now! Heh, really though this is an interesting turn. I assume they both became offshoot timeliness because Vriska existed in one world, and affected the other. You know, under the circumstances it might be that Bec Noir is the doomed one, all things considered.
Last edited by Nox; 02-02-2011 at 01:51 PM.
Writing:
Bulletproof: Vriska is a lot more vulnerable and remorseful than anyone would suspect, she just doesn't let anyone see that. My Best Friends: Nepeta makes a sacrifice, and reflects on her life in her final moments. I Am Not Like You: The moment when you can no longer hide from your own sins is always painful. Vriska learns this when Eriden becomes her mirror.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Oh man you guys I am sorry not to have more rainbow-drinker-Kanaya for you! Instead, um, here is a happy little story about Jack and the Queen. (SPOILER: BOTH THOSE ADJECTIVES ARE A LIE)
(IDK if we go in for trigger warnings around here but I should probably mention that, while there is no really graphic violence, this is a pretty unequivocally abusive relationship, which may not be to all tastes.)
Written/Unwritten
000:000:000
At the centre of a hollow chamber that spirals like the inner labyrinth of the ear, a sphere of glass hangs suspended in a cradle of tubes and wires. It is filled with a clear iridescent liquid that glows softly, shedding a warm green light over the chamber walls, which are warm and smooth as seashell but more probably formed from bone.
Floating inside the sphere are two half-formed bodies, their tear-drop heads resting brow-to-brow and their hands interlinked. Both are coated in an opalescent caul, but one thing is immediately apparent: one carapace is the chalk-white of Prospit, the other the coal-black of Derse.
At the base of the incubation vat, where a thick cluster of wires trails down and vanishes into a groove in the floor, a ridge of bone is stamped with an unfamiliar insignia.
Jack knows he shouldn't be here. Paperwork awaits upstairs, and he doesn't want to disappoint the Queen on his first day as an Archagent, but there is something peculiar about the insignia which he cannot ignore.
Upon closer inspection it becomes clear that the barbed and contorted design inscribed upon the bone is nothing less than two interlocking crowns.
Jack, says a voice, which writes itself in seething letters, I see you've found us.
"What do you mean, Majesty?" he says, falling to his knees automatically.
The Black Queen emerges from behind a fluted pillar of violet bone, every bit as tall and elegant as he has been given to expect.
Stand up, Jack, she says, Obsequious is not a good look for you.
"What's going on?" He stands, knees shaking more than he cares to admit. "Who are these people?"
My sister and I. The Queen glides over to the vat and rests a hand lightly on the surface of the glass. We grow here and I instruct us in the ways of strategy and rule. When the time is right we will be sent back in time for our coronation.
"You have the Queen of Prospit right here and you're not gonna just pull her out of the tub and kill her? Majesty - sorry for speakin' out of turn, but - you could end the war today, everythin' would be over before it even began."
He knows already that it isn't going to happen. If the Queen in her infinite wisdom has suffered her traitorous counterpart to live for this long, the words of a new-hatched Archagent aren't going to change anything.
Quite apart from the fact that killing her would kill me - and I'm sure we don't want that to happen, do we? No, because that would be treason, and we flay and boil traitors, don't we? - it will not happen because it is not meant to happen. Besides, the White Queen and I have an agreement born of necessity. No decisive move can be made by either party. Once begun the war will never end. We have no choice.
Jack stands still and says nothing. He thinks of the three small counters which hang above the Great Hall. One, in lights of purple, documents the number of hatchlings decanted that cycle. The second, in gold, will tally the slain Prospitians when battle begins. And the final counter is ready to measure, in scores and then in hundreds and finally in millions, the ranks of Dersite dead.
It is a betrayal, I know, says the Queen, I am sorry.
"Why are you tellin' me this?" says Jack, after a long, long while.
This discovery and your betrayal are inevitable. And I am truly sorry.
And the Queen is gone from his sight like a shadow when the light changes.
I
The war is a game and the game is a virus, and like any virus it must be propagated.
In later days the Queen comes to him herself, uninvited. A shade, in her long grey dress and simple crown, like a particularly dull child's drawing of a queen. She tells him things he doesn't want to know and they pour through his blood like a fever.
Skaia is a living organism and we are particularly specialised cells. By all accounts we should be drones. Draughtsmen moving on a board.
He could perhaps reconcile himself to life as an automaton if the words didn't come from the Queen, the beloved Majesty, the Glorious Monarch herself. They have all loved her since before they were born and all along she has known this?
It is hard to understand, I know, my dear, but our consciousness springs from the game parameters only as a most unexpected byproduct. An emergent property, if you like.
Her words drip venom into honey, and every time she visits she sits a little closer to him, whispers a little more longingly, barbs her words more viciously.
It had to be you. Any other Dersite would have shrugged and forgotten it and got on with things, but Jack, you could never live with it.
II
War is coming. Nobody will say it, but everyone knows it, and people roam the streets nervously, staring at the sky. Two of the orbs of the moon are illumined and the remaining pair will not stay dim for long. Jack sits at his desk, watching the video feed of the lifeless Grand Square, waiting for someone to do something.
Riot, goddammit, you cattle. Rise up.
He cannot tell them himself. The Queen has made it quite clear. He could scream treason all over the capital city, and if anyone listened - and most likely they would execute him and write a poem to the Glorious Monarch in his blood - the whole universe would be doomed, another casualty to the alpha timeline.
I'm afraid you're just going to have to live with the knowledge, says the Queen, I know it hurts you.
No more apologies from her. The prototyping has driven her quite mad, he sometimes thinks. No longer content to lie to him, and then to tell him a truth that cuts more deeply. Now she has to humiliate him. It seems so petty, complaining about the goddamn uniform. That's what nobody understands. She makes him dress as a clown, a joke, so that he knows she has ultimate power over him, and that his very existence is a joke, manipulated into absurdity by the whim of a stupid child.
Oh, Jack, she says, I think it suits you. Besides, have you seen the garish horror I have to wear? It's so skimpy, I feel ridiculous. To say nothing of these tentacles, honestly.
She does a twirl, and the delicate fabric of her skirt swishes around her thighs in a way that is undeniably distracting.
Now, don't stare, it's rude. Not to say treasonous.
In a flash she flicks the tip of one sleek tentacle swiftly against his cheek, leaving a slice that will turn into a welt, before swanning out of his office with a smile.
III
There is a third light in the sky, and he has a summons from the Queen.
Archagent. I require your presence. At once.
She is clearly attempting to keep her voice calm, but there is a ragged edge of panic underneath it which both intrigues and delights him. He finds her at last in the chamber where they first met, alone. The spherical cloning vat is empty and drained of liquid, the two embryonic Queens sent off to do their duty in the past.
"Jack," she says, and he realises that she is unprototyped, and that this is the first time he has heard her voice undistorted by the power of the ring. She looks somehow more fragile, though still mad as a spider and twice as vicious. "They've gone. It's really happening."
"Yeah?" he says, "What am I supposed to do about it?"
"Well nothing, Jack, that's just it, isn't it?" She is facing away from him, and there is something in her voice that suggests barely-modulated hysteria.
"Why ain't you wearing the ring?" he says, "What if I just wrung your little neck, what would happen to your precious timeline then?"
"Oh, would you, Jack?" she says, turning with a snarl that melts into an unsettling grin and then a sigh. "Would you do that for me?" She leans back against the glass of the vat and spreads her arms to each side as if pinioned there, before giving him the most terrifying come-hither look he has ever seen.
"Come back when you've smartened up a little, doll," he says with a grin. He's probably pushing it too far, but at this stage he can't bring himself to care what she does to him.
"You dare," she hisses, and twitches as though trying to summon her tentacles back to strangle him.
"Gonna have to put the ring back on for that," he says, and is surprised to see her face crumple, even at the thought. The ring rests on the palm of her hand, an innocent gold circlet, and not for the first time he wonders what it would be like to wear the thing and feel that power in him.
"It hurts," she whispers, "It really, really - the Prince of Derse prototyped a bird with a fucking sword through its ribcage, it's agony."
Jack can't stop himself laughing, bitter peals that echo throughout the spiral chamber. "Oh, god, this is too good," he gasps, "You... you enjoy that, darlin'. If all you want to do is whine at me, I'm going home. Heavy is the head and all, but I don't give a shit."
You show some respect or so help me I will cut you limb from limb, timelines be damned, she says. A shadow falls, and as Jack looks up he stops laughing. Great wings spread from the Queen's shoulders, silhouetted against the green glass. The curved blade of a thornblack sword extends from her midriff like a sharp streak of ink. If she is truly in pain, she gives no indication of it.
"Oh, very impressive," says Jack, "How many times did you practice that in front of the mirror?"
Jack Noir, she says, Bow your head.
"To you?" he says, "I don't think so. What kind of Queen are you? We're all parts of the same machine, says you. You don't deserve my respect."
She falls on him like a hawk on a mouse and bears him to the floor, clawing at his eyes with an insane fury unlike anything he has ever witnessed. He cries out sharply but she already has him pinned, his face crushed against the ground, her nails cutting into his neck, the weight of her pressing him down. He feels his rage and bitterness calming once more to a strangely comforting resignation. No more control.
I could kill you right now, she says, Stop struggling or maybe I'll do it. It would ruin everything. Everything. Does it mean anything to you, Jack, that I hate you enough to do that?
He tries to speak, and chokes out some approximation to "Why?"
Because you have a choice. I received word from my sister. She told me that you get to make a choice. Do you think I've ever had that luxury? Do you? Do you know, ah, do you know what the fourth prototyping is going to be, darling?
"Nn?" he manages. She leans down and whispers, her lips brushing his cheek tenderly.
Knowledge. My dear sister was awfully secretive, as is her usual practice, but she is quite clear that the final prototyping will bring knowledge of a kind none of us can possibly bear. Do you look forward to that, Jack? Can you imagine what it will be like, to see every session, every timeline, every iteration of every mistake you are fated and compelled to make, played out in living colour? Won't that be fun?
She slackens off her grip on his neck and lets herself float upwards on crow's wings, turning slowly in the green glow of the empty vat. Jack is left on the floor, gasping for breath and shivering.
"Place a good lot of trust in prophecy, don't you, doll?" he says, hoarsely.
Of course. It's all there is.
A/N
This was insanely fun to write, oh man. Which probably means it sucks, but there we go.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
@Kerensky: Glad you covered my fic because I really figured you wouldn't have time! I will try to write more often. As I've alluded, I'm busy trying to crack this here nut.
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Originally Posted by PingZing
Aerodactylus - Whoa. Thassa lotta worldbuilding right there. I enjoyed it! The inter-class conflicts based on zodiac symbol and its related ideology was an interesting idea. The canon characters you used were nicely in character; I cannot help but love picturing Gamzee as the loud, drunken-but-competent(?) butler.
Thanks so much! Yeah, worldbuilding is one of my favorite things about writing. And I'm definitely looking forward to writing Gamzee's oneshot.
@Stormrunner: Go for it! This IS the fanfic thread, after all. There is also a dedicated writing critique thread, but more exposure never hurts!
Re: MSPA Fanfiction V: We're Going to Need More Wands
Originally Posted by Aerodactylus
@Stormrunner: Go for it! This IS the fanfic thread, after all. There is also a dedicated writing critique thread, but more exposure never hurts!
Well, I just want a proofread before I post it to make sure it doesn't sound like drivel like my last one XD. Not sure how many people would proof a 13 page single spaced story that is Vriska centric (I plan to write it from other points of view later on if this one goes over ok).