Magic: the Sburbening

**A Fan** · 02-01-2011, 12:55 PM

Greetings! I emerge from the mists of obscurity and forum bandwagon off-falling to provide unasked-for fanwankery in card game form! Rejoice!

Eh, close enough. In any case, since I didn't find one, I decided to make the obligatory "make Magic cards based on MSPA" thread. This site may be of help to the aesthetically concerned. As I am not among them, I'll just post something to get the ball rolling:

Running low on time. I'll have to add the rest of the flavor text later. Feel free to criticize my work thus far, everyone, and don't hesitate to offer your own ideas!

**tacticalCelebrant** · 02-01-2011, 02:33 PM

hmmm what an interesting idea. this could even be a cycle. maybe one troll for each 2 color pairing. plus maybe an artifact for aradia and a multicolor for someone else. this should still be fun. plus we could have lusii and the kids and cool equipment like the wrinklefucker and sorceries like the windy thing and other silly things. i'll get right on creating this stuff.

okay just finished. here is my rough draft. for the trolls

I made these at the same time as A Fan. not trying to replace his, just making my own cycle.

**The Cool** · 02-01-2011, 06:21 PM

Eridan makes it so your opponent cant lose The Game?

FFFFFFFFUUUUUUUU-

**tacticalCelebrant** · 02-01-2011, 07:21 PM

time to make cards out of the kids. one of each color minus black because none of them seem really selfish.

on my to do list:
guardians
lussii
equipment
instants and sorceries
midnight crew
jack (noir, noirlecrow, and bec noir)

probably gonna have less cycles and more fun cards now.

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-01-2011, 07:40 PM

i have some critiques about the kids cards:
Why is John red and Dave white? John is clearly white, and Dave feels blue if anything.
Why is Jade as strong as Wolly Thoctar while Dave is a 2/2? That seems a little incongruous. Dave is stronger than a Grizzly Bears.
Rose's two abilities seem unconnected. If the second is her "ultimate", make it FEEL ultimate. On the other hand, I feel like it would be better to just focus on her Seer powers.

**tacticalCelebrant** · 02-01-2011, 07:50 PM

thank you dynamicEquilibrium,
i made john red and dave white because i was trying to make a cycle, but i ended up giving some of the cards abilities that didnt match the colors. i suppose that trying to enforce rigid cycles on such dynamic characters was a bad idea.
i made jade strong to make up for her being asleep for half of the time and i didn't know how else to represent a kid with a gun on a magic card, and keep it green. (more forced color troubles.) and well, dave is about as strong as 3 2/2 first strikers.
rose...yeah i kinda made her in a hurry. good idea to just focus on the seer powers. maybe i can make the Plan into a sorcery or something.
back to brainstorming!

**Varkarrus** · 02-01-2011, 08:12 PM

I created a bunch of homestuck themed cards for what me and my friends called "A thousand blank magic the gathering cards"

Though none of us have ever really played much magic the gathering. We only have passing knowledge!

For some reason, the John, Dave, Rose and Doc Scratch cards were missing...

http://img546.imageshack.us/g/vriskaserket.png/

**tacticalCelebrant** · 02-01-2011, 08:27 PM

more cards. including fixed (i hope) versions of the kids.

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-01-2011, 11:34 PM

i designed a card because i like flip cards:

Kernelsprite 3
creature-sprite
flying
imprint-when a creature you control would be put into a graveyard from the battlefield, you may exile it imprinted on CARDNAME, put a 3/3 colorless Sprite creature token with flying into play, and flip CARDNAME
0/1
//
Prototyped Incipisphere
enchantment
imprint-creatures you control have all colors, creature types, and activated abilities of creature cards imprinted on CARDNAME

then i designed another one because i like absurd tokens
skirk ridge exhumer ftw!

Hephaestus' Shrine 1
Artifact Creature-Wall
Defender
When CARDNAME is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, put a legendary equipment artifact token named "Caledfwylch" onto the battlefield. It has "equip 2" and "equipped creature gets +2/+2, haste, and first strike".
0/3

also, @tacticalCelebrant:
I like the new kids a lot better
green/white is definitely the ideal color for john
my only suggestion for him is that he be bigger- multicolored legendaries tend to be pretty powerful and green and white have the strongest creatures anyway

i like dave, just like the first time, but i would probably drop white from his colors. replication and time manipulation are both traditionally on red or blue cards but not other colors

rose should probably be more expensive, as t: draw a card is a pretty crazy effect
of course, her legendariness compensates for that some but she also has scrying powers, so i would probably put her at 5 cmc

finally, jade is the same thing as rose only much much more so
she is a fully leveled brimstone mage which costs 4. i can't even describe how absurd that effect is if you can play it at all early. for comparison, kamahl, pit fighter is another legend with the same effect, but he costs 6 and does not have scrying. Kamahl does have haste though, so 6 could be a reasonable cost for jade. i would recommend just making her a pinger instead, maybe something like prodigal pyromancer's and merfolk looter's tap abilities on the same card or something. after all, jade isn't really the strongest kid; at this point most people would probably say she's the weakest.

i don't have much to say about the other cards, but terezi's lies and vriska's manipulations could both be cheaper than they are, especially since they are multicolor. i would drop 1 colorless mana off of vriska's manipulations and 2 colorless off of terezi's lies

**Wabbajack** · 02-02-2011, 12:12 AM

Some corrections/commentaries/suggestion

Originally Posted by tacticalCelebrant

more cards. including fixed (i hope) versions of the kids.

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-02-2011, 12:54 AM

@ wabbajack: the way you actually write the effect you proposed for The Plan is "destroy up to three target nonland permanents"

for Terezi's Lies, actually, casting something from another players hand works normally. you don't have to exile it. you could word it "target opponent reveals his or her hand. choose an instant or sorcery card from it. you may cast that card without paying its mana cost.", which is frankly simpler and more flavorful for the same effect

for snowman, you would have to specify "whenever a source a player controls deals lethal damage to snowman or an effect a player controls destroys snowman", but i like the fixed version. unfortunately, some methods of removal like -x/-x effects or playing another legendary with the same name wouldn't count as destroying, but it isn't a very important loophole.

WHY DID YOU MAKE JOHN CHEAP?!?! he is one of the strongest characters in homestuck. and get your weaksauce hybrid mana off of legendaries as well. sometimes, you want to design a little 2 drop to fill out your uncommons, and sometimes you want to make a mythic rare legendary multicolor bomb in the two colors with the strongest creatures. i think john egbert would probably fall under the second set of sometimes. also, he doesn't need a special equipment effect: double strike synergizes with equipment on its own.
my egbert would be something like:
John Egbert 2WG (still relatively cheap, but he's a protagonist. you don't stick protagonists on two-drops)
Legendary Creature-Human Warrior
Double Strike, Trample, Vigilance
3/3
this probably seems OP to you, but for a multicolor legend it is actually quite weak

dave is clearly not a white card and AGAIN with the hybrid mana problems. flavorwise, the tokens shouldn't be legendary- if you look at the trollian viewport of dave's timeline there are about 50 of him at once. i know those aren't doomed daves, but doomed selves haven't really been important to dave- this ability is really trying to represent stable time loops, in which case the vanishing still makes sense because they later have to become the original or something. however, i agree that a storm of hasted firststriking daves is not going to be conducive to fairness, so maybe his cost should be upped or the original shouldn't have haste

i agree that rose is a very well-designed card
however, i still have no idea how you think that a little bit of double strike on john is too much but you can accept rose being jace the mind sculptor numbers 5-8 with no problem. this effect is completely absurd at its cost. rose should probably be cmc 5 or maybe higher
EDIT: i did some research and it seems that 4 to 5 is the usual cmc for t: draw a card creatures. given rose's scrying her cost would have to be 5 but that seems high enough when compared to similar cards.

jade's rifle was completely crazy
i still like it though
it just seems stupid to have 2 kids being scryers with no real variations. like i said, jade probably wants to be something like cost RU tap: draw a card then discard a card tap: jade deals one damage to target creature or player
that keeps our multicolored legendaries nicely powerful while still leaving jade at the bottom of the pack

in retrospect, it would be incredibly cool if the kids mana costs went 2-3-4-5. this somewhat shoehorns dave into being the three-drop, so his ridiculous duplication tendencies might have to be reined in. i think dropping haste from both the original and the copies would let dave be a 1RU and not be broken.

**champlooCanti** · 02-02-2011, 01:19 AM

Okay i saw this and thought "hellz yes, MTG && SBURB = ULTIMATE ALCHEMY."
Here's my two bits, the Kids as a cycle of Planeswalkers:

John Egbert, Heir of Breath 1UU
Planeswalker—John
4 Loyalty
+1: Return target nonland permanent to its owner's hand. (the windy thing)
+1: Scry 1. (skaia clouns)
-X: Destroy target creature with converted mana cost X. (MANGRIT HAMMER ATTACK)

Rose Lalonde, Seer of Light 1BB
Planeswalker—Rose
6 Loyalty
0: Scry 1, then draw a card. (Crystal Ball)
-3: Destroy target permanent. (dark magic)
-X: Place an X/X colorless Eldrazi creature token on the battlefield. It has Annihilator 1 and Deathtouch. (summon lesser horrorterror)

Dave Strider, Knight of Time 1RR
Planeswalker—Dave
3 Loyalty
+1: Copy target spell. You may choose new targets for the copy. (time loop)
+2: Target creature gains Haste and Double Strike until end of turn. (speed up time)
-5: Dave Strider, Knight of Time deals 3 damage to all creatures opponent controls. (mob of daves)

Jade Harley, Witch of Space 1GG
Planeswalker—Jade
5 Loyalty
+1: Destroy target creature with flying. (markswoman)
-1: Place a 2/2 green Frog creature token on the battlefield. It has Shroud. (frogs)
-7: Exile all nonbasic lands. (spacey power stuff)

**tacticalCelebrant** · 02-02-2011, 01:51 AM

thank you wabbajack and dynamicEquilibrium for the advice
pogo hammer's "3: untap double power" is crazy powerful. but flavorful. compare it to wine of blood and iron or chameleon colossus.
you are right about how hammers should not give toughness bonuses.
yeah, mind honney is better at 6
doc scratch is unplayable on purpose. you are not supposed to be able to tell guardians what to do. he said so himself. you'd have to trick him some how. maybe get someone else to control him so he can go crazy on them.
i really wanted snowman to cost 8. so i could maybe make the felt a line of silly creatures (itchy 1/1 haste for 1) it's gonna be tough to word and balance, but i liked the idea so i gave it a shot.
i made dave white because he is a knight. he has first strike and makes tokens. kinda white i guess. anyway, i think he'd be fine as the original without haste.
rose should be 3UU i guess
i can't seem to make a good jade. someone else have a shot.
feltstopable was me making something too silly. it's what happens when eggs and biscuits got hold of a time traveling train. should change the mana cost to FFFFFFFFFFFFF. felt mana.

anyway incoming wall of cards.

now that we got the kids and the trolls, time for some more noncreature stuff. enjoy!

**crackpotTheorist** · 02-02-2011, 04:18 AM

Here are some actual cards.
http://s269.photobucket.com/albums/j...%20SBURBening/

I'm gonna be updating that gallery, and will be changing the images. Might even use a custom cardface, not sure. Also looking for better fan art to use on them.

**A Fan** · 02-02-2011, 09:36 AM

Oh my goodness, these are things of beauty. Infinite thanks, Theorist!

I'll be making more cards soon. For now, a teaser:

Andrew Hussie, Fictionwright 3UR
Planeswalker — Hussie
+1 - Draw a card.
-2 - Untap target nonplaneswalker permanent. Until end of turn, you gain control of that permanent and it gains haste.
-7 - Put a legendary colorless Puppet artifact creature token named Lil' Cal onto the battlefield. It has fear and "This creature's power and toughness are equal to the number of nonland permanents you control."
3

(Andrew can tell you a story, command virtually anything (including hats), or just call up Lil' Cal to freak out/kill your foes.)

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-02-2011, 11:57 AM

i just realized i have been writing both blue and black as B this whole time

time for more critques- LoWaS doesn't have to be legendary; there are lot of specific locations on zendikar represented by non-legendary lands
AH is definitely a planeswalker, but he's quite weak given how expensive he is

also, i have a new idea for eridan which i think is more flavorful
Eridan Ampora 2B
Legendary Creature- Troll Advisor
{T}: Put a rejection counter on a creature other than CARDNAME. If all other creatures have rejection counters on them, flip CARDNAME.
//
Eridan, Foreveralone
Legendary Creature- Troll Wizard
Intimidate, Flying, Deathtouch
6/5

I considered giving eridan's flipped form the ability "whenever CARDNAME attacks, target creature's controller sacrifices it", but i think it might be unnecessary. I definitely think one of the legendaries should have that ability though; maybe Gamzee. Also, I know his unflipped form's ability is sort of awkwardly worded, but if it isn't written that way you could play eridan on a board with no other creatures and get an instant huge demon.

**A Fan** · 02-02-2011, 12:28 PM

I just thought of this, and I love it.

Kringlify 3(rw)
Instant
Target creature becomes a 4/4 red and white legendary creature with flying named Santa Claus until end of turn.
"shit. lets be santa."
—Sweet Bro

On a more serious note:

On a less serious note:

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-02-2011, 01:26 PM

i think that maybe we shouldn't just have one card per main character
John "I got to the top of my echeladder in like 2 hours" Egbert should probably have a separate card from Heir of Breath Egbert
characters like Gamzee and Eridan who go from pathetic to powerful should probably be flip cards or something so the point is to get them to transform and be awesome (see my Eridan Ampora//Eridan, Foreveralone), but John, Vriska, and Aradia were all really powerful before going god tier and their pre-god-tier forms should also be represented.

Here is my example for john:
John Egbert 2WG
Legendary Creature-Human Warrior
Double Strike, Trample, Vigilance
3/3

John, Heir of Breath 2WG
Legendary Creature-Human Shaman
Flying
Whenever CARDNAME attacks, choose one- Up to three target creatures gain flying until end of turn, or up to three target creatures lose flying until end of turn.
3/4

before ascending, John is just a really powerful fighter, but as heir of breath he controls the winds and therefore the ability to fly

@ A Fan
did you realize that your version of dave can be suspended for X=1, in which case you get him a turn early with haste and a token to boot? I think dave should probably just replicate himself like tacticalCelebrant's version. "suspend" isn't just some automatic mechanic that encompasses all time manipulation, and dave doesn't feel like someone who waits around before joining the fight; he joins the fight before it happens, hence splinter-twinning is probably the best way to represent his time powers.

**Wabbajack** · 02-02-2011, 02:22 PM

Now that you mention "he joins the fight before it happens", Dave could have flash and maybe even split-second.

**dynamicEquilibrium** · 02-02-2011, 04:04 PM

rather than just all designing our own cards, we could put this to a vote. let's start with john (god tier version).
Everybody who wants input on this should vote for his:
Color(s)
Subtypes
Abilities (it would probably be best to put this in general terms)
Power/Toughness

I vote:
WG
Human Shaman
Flying and grants flying to other creatures
3/4

**Sleaw** · 02-02-2011, 05:29 PM

I made these a while ago, actually.

They were kind of a rush job, though, and aren't very well balanced. Still, they were not designed to be the most overkill creatures, just somewhat more powerful than the rest, in most cases. Also, I just wanted to do 2 of every color as well as of Artifact creatures, which is why Sollux isn't red/blue as would be obvious etc.

Edit: Equius appears to have disappeared... well, safe to know he was the STRONGEST creature and had double strike.

**A Fan** · 02-03-2011, 09:45 AM

Originally Posted by dynamicEquilibrium

i think that maybe we shouldn't just have one card per main character
John "I got to the top of my echeladder in like 2 hours" Egbert should probably have a separate card from Heir of Breath Egbert
characters like Gamzee and Eridan who go from pathetic to powerful should probably be flip cards or something so the point is to get them to transform and be awesome (see my Eridan Ampora//Eridan, Foreveralone), but John, Vriska, and Aradia were all really powerful before going god tier and their pre-god-tier forms should also be represented.

No one said there has to be one card per character. My cards, for example, were intentionally capturing characters at high points in their development (and, in Gamzee's case, a point prior to that.) I admit that the whole "blarr must use Sburbian honorific in every card name blarrrr" thing might have made that less than obvious.

Originally Posted by dynamicEquilibrium

@ A Fan
did you realize that your version of dave can be suspended for X=1, in which case you get him a turn early with haste and a token to boot? I think dave should probably just replicate himself like tacticalCelebrant's version. "suspend" isn't just some automatic mechanic that encompasses all time manipulation, and dave doesn't feel like someone who waits around before joining the fight; he joins the fight before it happens, hence splinter-twinning is probably the best way to represent his time powers.

At the risk of initiating an epic chain-quoting nerd-off, I'm going to reply to this: It's kind of the point. You aren't actually supposed to cast my Dave card, but suspend it in order to create a more-than-sane number of Daves situation. He's just that good at this game. That said, I do agree that it's overpowered as is. Thus, I submit the following adjustment.

Dave, Knight of Time
Legendary Creature — Human Knight
Dave is blue and red.
First strike
Suspend 2 3UR
Whenever a time counter is removed from Dave while it's exiled, you may put a 2/2 blue and red Human Knight creature token onto the battlefield.
3: Put a time counter on Dave. Any player may activate this ability, but only if Dave is suspended.
3/2

Basically, any player can play Terezi and force Dave into ever more elaborate time loop shenanigans. While this forestalls the man himself, it does allow for additional earlier Dave tokens. In order to add some incentive to getting Dave proper out, I downgraded the tokens a bit. Sadly, this extra rules baggage meant that there's probably no room for flavor text...

And, since I'm posting, I may as well offer some new cards:

**Sleaw** · 02-03-2011, 12:12 PM

Stealing this and making it at least 100% more stupid :P

What Pumpkin? WW
Enchant Creature
Enchanted creature gets shroud and is indestructible. Effects of spells or abilities that affect any card in play do not affect enchanted creature. Enchanted creature cannot be sacrificed. Whenever enchanted creature attacks or blocks, remove it from the game and return What Pumpkin? to it's owner's hand.

Sorry :P

**telehax** · 02-03-2011, 12:19 PM

Land of Wind and Shade
Legendary Land - Forest Swamp
(Land of Wind and Shade counts as a forest and a swamp, and can be tapped to add G or B mana to your mana pool)
Whenever a sorcery or instant deals damage to you, tap Land of Wind and Shade, it doesn't untap during your next untap step.

Land of Heat and Clockwork
Legendary Land
{T} - Add R to your mana pool
{T} - Add 2 to your mana pool, spend this mana only to cast artifact spells. Land of Heat and Clockwork deals 2 damage to you.

Land of Light and Rain
Legendary Land
Land of Light and Rain comes into play tapped.
{T} - Add U or B to your mana pool
X,{T},Sacrifice Land of Light and Rain - Scry 2X, then draw 1

Land of Frost and Frogs
Legendary Land
Land of Frost and Frogs cannot be played from your hand.
Suspend 2
{T} - Add G to your mana pool
1,{T} - Put a X/X Green Frog token into play, where X is the number of frogs in play, plus 1

**Sleaw** · 02-03-2011, 12:33 PM

I wouldn't want the first three lands into any of my decks, but the fourth one is ridiculously strong.

I'll take it!

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