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Thread: AdultStuck (Text AU. We're back!)

  1. #1
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    AdultStuck (Text AU. We're back!)

    SPECIAL NOTE: Sburb will NOT BE INVOLVED in this story. Referenced, yes, but not involved directly in the plot or anything. No one is hopping into the medium anymore.

    The Wiki: http://mspafa.wikia.com/wiki/AdultStuck

    The Mirror: http://nixshadow.com/mspfa/?s=238&p=1

    The Formspring: http://www.formspring.me/AdultStuck

    The Message Board: http://s15.invisionfree.com/AdultStuck_Forums/index.php

    Fan Art!



    Author's Notes and other Fine Questions


    -------------------------
    PROLOGUE: IN THE LAIR OF MRS. EGBERT

    A young man rests lazily on his bed. It just so happens that today, the 13th of April, is this young man's birthday. Thought it was twenty four years ago this young man was given life, it is…only…today…

    Errrr…

    Wait a minute. You think you know this young man. You've seen him somewhere before. The buck teeth, those stupid glasses resting on the bedside…The black hair…

    Oh god. Oh god. You know this guy. In fact, you realize to your mounting horror you ARE him. It's all too familiar, and yet different. You are not yet clear why you are back here, or why…

    You are MR. EGBERT, but your friends call you JOHN. As was previously mentioned it is your BIRTHDAY, although it sure as hell doesn't FEEL LIKE IT. In your childhood days you would already have cakes strewn about your room, but now you are pretty sure there's only you and your TERRIFYING TROLL WIFE'S clothing strewn about because you are both CHRONICALLY MESSY. You still have an interest in TERRIBLE MOVIES, but your walls are filled with pictures of NICOLAS CAGE and LESBIAN VAMPIRES due to your AFOREMENTIONED MUNCHKIN WIFE'S tastes.

    (You both have an understanding, as you still have a bit of a thing for LIV TYLER)

    You have a variety of BUSINESS INTERESTS all across your local community on the NEW WORLD you and your CHILDHOOD FRIENDS created, which makes sense as you are effectively RULER and GOD-KING OF HUMANITY, though you prefer not to think of it quite that way and neither does anyone else. Though you do control the very WIND ITSELF, and you like to think of yourself as a GOD OF AMATEUR MAGIC, because another FRIEND has taken over REAL MAGIC. You have a fondness for PARANORMAL LORE but it admittedly feels sort of mundane given that you are basically PARANORMAL LORE nowadays. You hate CLOWNS for a very good reason.

    You are still lying in your bed this morning, and you really don't want to get up. The ALARM CLOCK beside your bed is taunting you, however, and you probably shouldn't lie around all day. You have no idea if your SCARY GOD WIFE is in bed yet either.
    What will you do?
    Last edited by Godfrey; 04-10-2011 at 12:54 AM. Reason: Updated Fan Art

  2. #2

    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    Go outside and describe the city you, your friends, and (Somehow?!) several Trolls created once defeating the mighty Flying Dog God Monster. It is beautiful, and it is FUTURISTIC BY FAR.
    bluh.

    Check out my forum adventure I guess. If you want to :3

    Link to adventure:

  3. #3
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    Mr. Egbert: Go outside and describe the city you, your friends, and (Somehow?!) several Trolls created once defeating the mighty Flying Dog God Monster. It is beautiful, and it is FUTURISTIC BY FAR.

    That is an excellent idea, you think as you get out of bed and into your SPIFFY BUSINESS ATTIRE WITH SLIMER TIE. You think you'll do just that! Of course, you quickly realize that as the only human (and male) member of the GODLY TRIUMVIRATE you've got duties to attend to today anyway. You imagine the GODDESS OF TIME is waiting for the two of you to get off your asses anyway. You quickly remember that it is time for the COURT OF SKAIA to meet with each other and the mostly teenaged populace of your fair CITY, as happens on the 13th of every month.

    ...If you can get out of the house and escape the whims of your SPOUSE, that is. God, what a pain in the ass. She just does whatever the hell she wants, and what she wants it to make the both of you stronger gods through conflict with one another. You're pretty sure your UNDYING LOVE is quite STRONG er you mean strong. You just hope her gift to you on your birthday wasn't converting the entire dwelling into some kind of dungeon or having SPIDER-MOM re-reborn again for the third time and nearly killing your BEST BROS.

    That would suck. Again. But it does kind of remind you of DAD and NANNA, except more violent.

    Scanning your surroundings quickly, there is no sign of your SPOUSE. Your bed is empty. However, your WIFE'S RECUPERACOON sits rather ominously in the corner, and you can't see inside it from where you're standing. There is a closed DOOR leading out into a hallway, and a MAN-SIZED WINDOW looking out onto the street below. You have a WALLET MODUS and OLD SCHOOL COMPUTERIZED GLASSES equipped, but no weapons.

    Equipped

    Last edited by Godfrey; 02-26-2011 at 02:00 AM.
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  4. #4

    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Smash out the window..... Quietly. Then turn your KICKASS SLIMER TIE into a USEFUL LASSO TO THE..... Wait. You forget how high up your house is.

    What floor are you on?
    bluh.

    Check out my forum adventure I guess. If you want to :3

    Link to adventure:

  5. #5
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Smash out the window..... Quietly. Then turn your KICKASS SLIMER TIE into a USEFUL LASSO TO THE..... Wait. You forget how high up your house is.

    ...Yeah, you suddenly realize you're not sure how high up you are. You never really think about it. Then again, you were stupid enough to let your BELOVED design the house. You remember having to make her tone it down when she literally turned it into a death trap. Just the first of many arguments...

    You push on the window first. It doesn't budge. So you decide to give it a nice, forceful punch.

    The well-reinforced door sends you on your godly ass. SO MUCH FOR THAT PLAN.

    You briefly consider using your POWER OVER THE VERY WIND ITSELF to blow open a hole in the window, but you destroyed the bedroom last time you did that. You'd prefer not to repeat the experience. You have to restrict yourself from doing the WINDY THING inside your dwelling. For now. You're just going to have to locate a hammer.

    Oh hey look, you just noticed that one of the aforementioned BROS is pestering you.

    PESTERLOG


    Well, that wasn't too encouraging.

    There is still the DOOR. And your wife's RECUPERACOON. Gulp.

  6. #6

    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >John, look for armoury and grab the BEST HAMMER YOU EVER CREATED.
    bluh.

    Check out my forum adventure I guess. If you want to :3

    Link to adventure:

  7. #7

  8. #8
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >John, look for armory and grab the BEST HAMMER YOU EVER CREATED

    Yeah, that's your first order of business you suppose. Of course, you've got to sneak around that...slime thing your WIFE usually sleeps in. You tried sleeping in it as well once. It didn't turn out well. You started aLtErNaTiNg EvErY mOtHeRfUcKiN lEtTeR.

    Then again Vriska told you not to eat the slime.

    You start to tiptoe around the RECUPERACOON, very quietly. You are like a motherfucking god-ninja. You are like a gentle spring breeze, wafting quietly around your sleeping beauty oh god you tripped.

    You hit the floor with a resounding THUD and probably bruised yourself a little.

    You hear something shift and bubble inside the RECUPERACOON. Oh god oh god oh god oh god. You are GOING TO SHIT YOURSELF. On pure ADRENALINE you clamber to your feet and punch the door open, MATURITY ROLLING out the door as it slams against the wall and bounces back on its hinges into the proper closed behind you.

    Your heart pounds in your chest. You're pretty sure you heard a cute little yawn in the bedroom.

    There is a DOOR TO THE ARMORY in the hallway, as well as some WINDING STAIRS that go up and down and a BATHROOM DOOR. You quickly duck into the armory in the desire to move this shit along.

    The FAMILY ARMORY is filled with every hammer you've ever owned, carefully placed on racks that lines the walls. It is a beautiful collection highlighting your SMASHING PROWESS. Lining the center of the floor is your WIFE'S FLARPING EQUIPMENT, stuffed into chests and in the case of clothing hung up on stands.

    There is also a bucket lovingly placed on a stand. You...Would prefer not to think about the bucket. You also aren't sure why she'd put that shit in the armory.

    Browsing your hammers, you quickly come across the BEST HAMMER YOU EVER CREATED. The amazing, glorious, incredibly powerful and destructive HAMMER OF ZILLYHO-

    >Best hammer John has ever created: Be the Wrinklefucker. You never needed Zillyhoo.

    ...You mean THE WRINKLEFUCKER. Ah, yes, the WRINKLEFUCKER. That really TAKES YOU BACK to the GOOD OLD TIMES, when Earth blew up and you spent all your time in the Medium, making friends and getting stabbed.

    Sigh. Now you mostly use the WRINKLEFUCKER to FUCK ACTUAL WRINKLES IN YOUR CLOTHING, so to speak.

    You're pretty sure your choice of the nostalgic hammer over the most powerful one will in no way be relevant today.

    You quickly exit the ARMORY, placing an ear to the BEDROOM DOOR. It seems pretty quiet now. Perhaps she's still asleep. You silently open the door and tiptoe to the WINDOW, remembering your original objective. Which was quietly smashing said window.

    You quietly raise the hammer, preparing to strike...

    Suddenly SOMETHING in the slime behind you stirs and grumbles, the slime bubbling like a cauldron filled with...stuff. You turn just into to see a slime-covered troll arm rise out of the slime and grab onto the edge!

    OH SHIT! What do you do now?!


  9. #9

    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >John Get the hell out of there! Alternatively, prepare to STRIFE!



    EDIT#2 (electric boogaloo) [alternate command]
    >John: Take an impromptu and inconvenient nap.
    Last edited by Steel Dragon; 02-26-2011 at 05:03 PM.

  10. #10
    ArmsAreLoud's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    Perspective: Suddenly switch to Vriska.

    Vriska: Aww, why is your darling hubby trying to leave? You haven't even gone through your daily training session yet! You should probably do that. Whether or not you should go to get some clothes on first is up to you.

  11. #11
    threw Karkats head onto Nepeta Kisame12's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >John: Fly pupa, FLYYYYYYYY
    Quotes: (Because we all have them.)

  12. #12
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Steel Dragon View Post
    EDIT: Forgot to say, I am really enjoying this. You are really nailing the writing style, like mOtHeRfUcKiN sLaUgHtErInG iT, mOtHeRfUcKeR
    Thanks! I'm definitely attempting it, for better or worse. XP! I appreciate the kind words. This is definitely kind of fun so far though.

    ------------------------------------------------

    >John Get the hell out of there! Alternatively, prepare to STRIFE!

    You considering STRIFING with your wife, but you're pretty sure she's probably not dressed! Aside from being terribly DISTRACTING even if you manage to LAND A HIT you would really rather not reduce your NAKED WIFE into BLUE BLOOD SOUP.

    So you decide to take the only sensible option and bash the WINDOW out to escape from your wife. You rear back and take a MIGHTY GOD SWING at the window. The impact reduces the glass into tiny pieces and sends you falling through the hole where the window was a second ago.

    You look down. It's...quite a long way.

    You suddenly realize that something like this happened to TavroooooooooooooooooAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAA!

    You hit the ground shortly after. Thanks to your God powers you make a bit of a crater in the lawn.

    You take critical damage, although thankfully you are probably not going to die. You'd rather your culture not have an ancient legend about how their WIND GOD accidentally fell to his death because he didn't want to talk to the LIGHT GODDESS one morning.

    You're pretty sure you can't move right now, though. And you have messages from your other BRO and your WIFE. You decide to reply to Karkat first.

    PESTERCHAT


    >John: Fly pupa, FLYYYYYYYY

    ...GOD DAMMIT. You always forget you can do that! Maybe if you had fairy wings like the girls you might actually remember.

    Well, looks like Vriska still wants to talk. You don't really have a choice right now.

    SPOUSELOG


    Thankfully, you suddenly fall asleep right after. At least your dream bubble is safe and quiet, although unfortunately the rest of us are not quite ready to talk about that yet.

    >Perspective: Suddenly switch to Vriska.

    You are now the SLIGHTLY LESS OF A HUGE BITCH BLUH BLUH you mean VRISKA SEKRET-EGBERT, the second third of the GODLY TRIUMVIR8.

    You are still a master of EXTREME ROLEPLAYING, but now instead of killing IMPRESSIONA8LE TROLLS you use it to help train the CHILDREN all across your CITY for the possibility of FUTURE COMBAT against the SUBJUGGULATOR HORDE that continues to threaten your NEW SOCIETY. You are a WATCHFUL SPIDER-MOM over your new world of SPONGY HUMAN KIDS and HARDY WIGGLERS and occasionally CARAPACED WEIRDOS, though you and John don't have any human ECTOBABIES or troll ECTOWIGGLERS or MIDNIGHT CREW RIPOFFS or even HORRIFYING TROLL-HUMAN ABOMNATIONS to call your your own (It has simply never come up!)

    You retain your APOCALYPSE BUFF nature, but you are more FORWARD-LOOKING now and wish to prepare FUTURE GENERATIONS for things like DEMONIC CLOWNS and THE NEXT ITERATION OF SBURB/SGRUB. Your DOOMSDAY WEAPONS are still in development, but are intended only to be used on the ENEMIES OF YOUR PEOPLE. They are still a little overpowered right now and would kill literally everyone when used, but R&D assures you that THEY ARE ON THAT SHIT.

    You are a KINDER, GENTLER VRISKA relatively speaking, but you're still not that great with the whole 8EING HUMAN thing John likes to talk about. Especially with regards to the TRAINING COURSES you set up for the fresh new recruits of the KNIGHTS OF BLOOD AND TIME a.k.a. THE TOWN MILITIA and the MAGICIANS' GUILD.

    They really hate you. They ask you to nerf them all the time, but you never do.

    You are alone, in your room, staring down at your SPOUSE snoozing on the lawn far below. You are currently equipped not equipped with anything except a RATHER SLIMY NIGHTGOWN and the DICE you always keep with you. You area also armed with ALL OF THE LUCK as well as ALL OF THE LEVELS as well as ALL OF THE SUSPICIONS ABOUT THE MAGIC GIRL.


    >Vriska: Aww, why is your darling hubby trying to leave? You haven't even gone through your daily training session yet! You should probably do that. Whether or not you should go to get some clothes on first is up to you.

    You H8 IT when JOHN HUSBAND you mean John tries to escape the house before you can go through a training session. It's not like you get to spend a whole lot of time with him otherwise, since trolls RULE THE NIGHT and the human PREFER DAYLIGHT. You suppose you'll be spending a lot of time with him today anyway, but that's because of AFFAIRS OF STATE. Which means you'll also be spending a lot of time with the GODDESS OF TIME and 8oy does she piss you right off with the way she makes sure everything RUNS ON TIME.

    You guess maybe you will just have to wait until later to send John through the INCREDIBLY AWESOME DUNGEON you built, though you are initiating MARITAL STRIFE as soon as he recovers.

    Assuming he's not bleeding to death on the sidewalk down there, anyway.

    What will you do?
    Last edited by Godfrey; 02-26-2011 at 09:18 PM. Reason: Fixing Typos

  13. #13
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Be hauted by Tavros.
    >Tavros: Be raiding the fridge.
    Quotes: (Because we all have them.)

  14. #14
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Be haunted by Tavros.

    You hear a loud crash downstairs, followed by some general rustling and a deathly chill in the air. You recognize the sensation. He's back again.

    Dammit.

    You toss on a SPIDER THEMED GODLY BATHRO8E before leaving your room and heading down several flights of stairs. You thought he had finally left, but noooooooo! Every few weeks or months he turns up in your house yet again and haunts you in the least effective but most irritating way possible. It's like he's not even trying. You just wish he'd go away.

    You kill a guy once...

    You hit the bottom two floors, which John describes as the HUMAN LIVING ROOM. It is basically a recreation of JOHN'S CHILDHOOD HOME on Earth as his insistence, albeit you have made a few touches of your own and there are far fewer HARLEQUINS. It's...Actually pretty cozy. You cast a wistful glance at the FIREPLACE MANTLE, where you and John have hung touching pictures of John's NANNA, DAD, and SPIDER-MOM. The ASHES of DAD stand in an urn on the fireplace, with two other urns holding the remains of NANNASPRITE and SPIDER-MOM-CLONE 2.0.

    You go down the significantly smaller and inferior NON-MENACING HUMAN STAIRS and walk into the KITCHEN.

    8ingo.

    >Tavros: Be raiding the fridge.

    There are plates and bits of human food strewn everywhere. It's a huge mess down here!

    As expected, there's a six solar sweeps old Tavros raiding John's fridge. You cross your arms and tap your foot angrily. He turns to you with dead eyes and an surprised, nervous and apologetic look.

    GHOSTLOG


    You turn away and rub your forehead angrily. You H8 that guy. You can't believe you still feel bad for killing him.

    You can't help but feel like you're getting distracted from...Uh...Something.
    Last edited by Godfrey; 02-26-2011 at 11:35 PM.

  15. #15
    Scribe of Light Twigwise's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Ignore being distracted and clean up after your dead blackrom crush.
    Better stretch my legs... Sure has been a while.
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  16. #16
    threw Karkats head onto Nepeta Kisame12's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Tavros: Go watch T.V, never once questioning why Equius hasn't made you a rob- ho wait. Dead. Right.
    >Ghost Equius: Hog the remote. Your dead, but gog damn it you WILL watch the 'Psyche' finale this season.
    >Vriska: Go help John.
    Quotes: (Because we all have them.)

  17. #17
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (A "Slightly" AU Text Adventure!)

    >Ignore being distracted and clean up after your dead blackrom crush.

    Ugh. Toreadum8ass got you so angry you can't remember what you were going to do. Something about your human Matesprit...? You'll just pick up a bit, you think. It'll probably come to you then.

    Of course, you're not really sure how all this works, so you just sort of stuff things all over the kitchen, out of sight.

    Good as new!!!!!!!! You're sure John will be...Uh...

    What was John doing again?

    >Tavros: Go watch T.V, never once questioning why Equius hasn't made you a rob- ho wait. Dead. Right.
    >Ghost Equius: Hog the remote. Your dead, but gog damn it you WILL watch the 'Psyche' finale this season.


    GHOSTLOG


    >Vriska: Go help John.

    You can't believe that you forgot that you left your Matesprit/hus8and on the lawn! And unconscious! Sometimes you feel you're still terrible at this!

    No...No...Now's not the time to beat yourself up.

    Gotta save John!!!!!!!!

    You rush out the front door and into the yard, where you see John sleeping like a HUMAN 8A8Y. You sit down by his side and gently jostle him awake, quickly checking for any wounds in the process. He seems fine.

    SPOUSELOG


    You gently help John to his feet. And then suddenly, you are John.

    VRISKA SEKRET-EG8ERT HAS JOINED YOUR PARTY!!!!!!!! SPOUSETECH UNLOCKED!

    Leaning on your WIFE/MATESPRIT, you cast your gaze around, the sun gently rising on the horizon. The streets are empty, the gentle breeze of your bold new world carrying soft whispers of the mob at the COURT to your ears. It produces the all-too-familiar beat underlying the chaos and noise of the CITY that you hear every day. It tickles your ears, speaking to you, repeating the words "We Are Family". A city of brothers and sisters, living and working together underneath the gleaming towers combining both TROLL and HUMAN elements of design. It is a beautiful city. A proud city. A shining symbol of rebirth, and triumph, and most of all...

    HOPE.


    And yet...

    It is your twenty fourth birthday, and like the eleven previous birthdays you find yourself unable to enjoy it. You wish you could relax and have fun, but you find you never do. It is a HOLY DAY, one of the THREE MOST IMPORTANT HOLY DAYS in your NEW CULTURE. And you are a God. While your many FOLLOWERS may try to take it easy on these days, their PRAYERS to you only increase. They are restless. Uneasy. And why shouldn't they be?

    The HORDE gathers on the horizon, reminders of a TRAITOR whose only motivation is RAGE. Strange ANIMALS and UNGRATEFUL MONSTERS populate the planet, not caring that you're the only reason they exist. The BLOOD of your PEOPLE calls out for home worlds they never knew and will never know. And you are one of the TEN FOREBEARS of a CULTURE of ECTOCLONES, with no guarantee of survival. You are not even sure you should be here. You might be interfering with a new species.

    There are no more guides to help you. There are no road maps for where to go. The guiding hand of destiny left you for dead long ago.

    "Each player must accept the cards life deals him or her. But once they are in hand, he or she alone must decide how to play the cards in order to win the game."-H.P.Lovecraft

    You are almost entirely sure Lovecraft said that.

    You have a feeling it's going to be a long day.





    You have probably wasted enough time this morning, anyway. The two of you need to get moving! Your new planet, uh...Your new planet...Isn't...

    Wait a minute.

    You can't remember what the hell you named your planet!

    You wrack your memory. What was the new planet's name?


    ------------

    (EDIT: HERP DERP feel free to notify me of stupid mistakes and typos by the way)
    Last edited by Godfrey; 02-27-2011 at 03:30 AM. Reason: Forgot to hit the stupid disable smilie box

  18. #18
    Unsertain Signboard... Triangle Man's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    ...

    Gallifrey?

  19. #19
    Heir of Blood Legendary's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    Alearthia.
    Everyone Sburb killed deserved exactly what they got, and it was all for the best. Team Sburb unite!

  20. #20
    Scribe of Light Twigwise's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    Quote Originally Posted by Triangle Man View Post
    ...

    Gallifrey?
    This.

    Alternately, is it Naboo?
    Better stretch my legs... Sure has been a while.
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  21. #21
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    >...is it Naboo?

    God, you wish! It was one of your very first suggestions. It would have been awesome! You were really looking forward to meeting a race of gungans.

    Unfortunately your idea what shot down as "stupid". Oh well. You might still get lucky, though. There might be gungans here.

    >Alearthia.

    That was another one. You thought it was incredible clever. Unfortunately not everyone agreed with you. There were a number of other names they didn't like either...

    Alternia-Earth
    New Earth
    Neo Earth
    Neo Alternia
    Alternia 2: Electric Boogaloo
    Earth 2: Earth Harder
    Bizarro Earth
    Cylon Earth
    SuperEarth
    SuperAlternia
    AwesomeLand
    Johntopia
    Nicolas-Cagia

    >...Gallifrey?

    THAT was the name! You remember now. How could you ever forget? You can't believe you managed to slip that one under everyone's noses. You're pretty sure no one noticed it was a Doctor Who reference. You are like a reference ninja.

    You also supposed the possibility of meeting TIME LORDS is a pretty kickass alternative to GUNGANS.

    It occurs to you that you already have two people here with control over TIME.

    You feel a little better about things.

    Anyway.

    SPOUSELOG


    Vriska suddenly pushes you aside, sprouts wings rather suddenly, and flies back up to that convenient hole in the window you created earlier. You nearly fall over, but manage to lean against the car. You are still INCREDIBLY ACHY.

    Strider is pestering the hell out of you.

    PESTERCHAT


    You are Vriska, and you have just walked into your rather spacious closet and are browsing all of your CLOTHING. You are looking for something AWESOME and GODLY and your choices are VAST and NUMEROUS. You are also WASTING TIME because SOMEONE once told you that taking a long time to get dressed was some sort of HUMAN MATING RITUAL and you are always interested in 8EING MORE HUMAN. What will you choose?

    You are also still John, because shit lets be a party. You are standing outside. There is a MAILBOX, a CAR, a EMPTY STREET. You are BORED OUT OF YOUR SKULL. Pretty much EVERY ONE OF YOUR CONTEMPORARIES is ONLINE and RANCOROUS. What will you do?

    :> _



  22. #22

    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    >Vriska: Wear the DEAD SHUFFLE DRESS you 'borrowed' indefinitely from your ecto-sister-in-law.

    >John: Examine CAR.

  23. #23

  24. #24
    Knight of Light Godfrey's Avatar
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    Re: AdultStuck (Text AU. Taking Planet Names!)

    >Person who convinced Vriska that taking a long time to dress is a human thing to do: Be Kanaya. Anything to get Vriska to care about her clothes more, right?

    Suddenly, you are Kanaya. Or at least you make your best effort to be. And you did indeed tell Vriska this. You may be messing with her a little. It's actually become a fond past time of yours over the years, and it's incredibly THERAPEUTIC. You smile a little to yourself as you think of it.

    At any rate, you BOREDNESS presently rivals your, er, RIVAL FOR AFFECTIONS. Although you bear no ill will against John personally, you find it uncanny his ability to share the same ships as you. You guess you both just have the same FETISHES. Either that or HUMAN ROMANCE really is weird.

    The THRONE ROOM AND DEBATE HALL is presently fairly quiet and mostly empty. You sit in your FAVORITE CHAIR at the square table that makes up most of it. Across from you sits TEREZI, which is slightly AWKWARD. ROSE meditates in a QUIET CORNER. ARADIA sits patiently on her RED THRONE, bordered on both sides by the presently empty BLUE and ORANGE THRONES, and a little off to the side a GRAY THRONE sits lonely because KARKAT insisted he should have one, and he's probably right. SOLLUX appears to be WANDERING AIMLESSLY and is PROBABLY OKAY WITH THAT. KARKAT and DAVE are presently outside, trying to keep the crowd calm. You have no idea where VRISKA, JOHN, or JADE are right now.

    You briefly consider going outside and using your DIPLOMACY abilities to quiet down all those five-ish solar sweeps old kids, but you are too busy being the MAIN LIGHT SOURCE in the room.

    You guess you'll just have to wait a little longer.

    >
    Vriska: Wear the DEAD SHUFFLE DRESS you 'borrowed' indefinitely from your ecto-sister-in-law.

    Haha, yes!!!!!!!! You will wear her dress! It looks better on you anyway, even if it is kind of a stupid dress. At least, that's what you keep telling yourself.

    You're really looking forward to pissing people off today. Well, except John and Kanaya you mean just John.

    You spend some time checking yourself out in the mirror.

    You maybe get a little lost in your own reflection.

    >John: Examine CAR.

    It is a perfect copy of your DAD'S CAR, for nostalgia purposes. It is absolutely in no way different...

    Okay, that's a lie. You're lying to yourself. You are a Bad Person.

    You're pretty sure Dad's car wasn't black with a green Slimer logo on it. You are also fairly certain the rocket propulsion system wasn't there before either, nor were the flame decals. Nostalgia is wonderful, but it's nothing compared to PCHOOOOOOOOOOO!

    All those eleven year old ecto-kids are sooo jealous.

    HALF Adventures: A science fiction satirical serial novel.
    https://dl.dropbox.com/u/52885142/TL...nierBanner.png: Interactive Post-Apocalyptic Noir Science Fantasy Novel
    DESIGNATION: ξ - δ - Corporate funded adventures.

  25. #25

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