TROLLSLUM: TEAM SPARKLEGRUB (Sorry, all spots reserved!)

[orngjce223]

Welcome to

N.B. This is a lighthearted Parody Sue session. No offense is intended, and hopefully none is taken. In the event that one of us should offend someone, we apologize in advance. If you don't think you'll like this, you can stop reading now. Please? Thank you.

Screw this, I'm not writing this section. We all know each other, just ask before you do anything game-changing and we should be fine.

Starli Prisma (prismaticGlimmer) (orngjce223)
Thamuz Gavrel (oblivionOathkeeper) (Lieutenant Fish)
Cannab Ressin (holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows) (Piester)
Dreasde Verietling (voraciousPretention) (Dalmationer)
???
???

Yes, we will be playing Sgrub. Yes, Sue powers can be used on the carapaces, Underlings, Consorts, etc. (you might wanna check with the other players before you do something like converting Jack Noir though). Yes, there will be plot (of a sort... considering these people are Sues, it's going to be kinda weird). No, we are not currently taking applications; I've already gotten everyone I want for this.

The arc number for this entire crazy enterprise will be 69. No, no particular reason for that number.

Our IRC channel is #sparklegrub on irc.esper.net. THAT SAID most of us hang out in #gnurb so if there's nobody in the sparklegrub channel look there.

[orngjce223]

prismaticGlimmer

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> Be the rainbow sparkle troll.


You are now STARLI KRYSTL MOONFLOWER ROBBYN HARTLY PRISMA, and you are CHARISMATIC AND ADORABLE. Sometimes you dabble in ALTERNIAN FASHION DESIGN, which, although a DANGEROUS HOBBY since the majority suppresses knowledge of the trade, is something you are HIGHLY TALENTED IN, and you have developed GREAT PROFICIENCY IN USING THE INTERNET to secretly share your trade. Although if you got arrested you could probably use THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP to get out of it, anyway. Your strife specibus has been modified by A VERY GOOD FRIEND OF YOURS so that it takes ANYTHING MARKED WITH A HEART. Therefore, you CARRY AROUND A ROLL OF HEART-SHAPED STICKERS, so that you can fight with ANYTHING YOU LIKE. Sometimes you also like to read TALES OF RED AND BLACK ROMANCE by TROLL JANE AUSTEN and FANTASIZE ABOUT FILLING YOUR QUADRANTS, because although everyone is your friend, none of them love or hate you enough to... well. You know what I mean.

Sometimes when you go to sleep you dream of A GLOWING GOLD PLANET and play with a lot of LITTLE WHITE PEOPLE WITH CARAPACES who are also your friends. They are always in awe of you, and they call you a princess! What's more, your blood is MADE OF REAL RAINBOW GLITTER, which makes you wonder how you weren't culled as a grub. Then you remember that EVERYONE HAS ALWAYS LOVED YOU, and it is all explained.

Your trolltag is prismaticGlimmer and *you're!always!really!,really!happy!to!meet!people!!!!:D*

oblivionOathkeeper

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> Be the conflicted crusader.



Your name is Thamuz Gavrel

Due to a predestined ECTOBIOLOGY MISHAP, the full ramifications and reasons for which are on the verge of being revealed, you were hatched HALF DEMON and HALF ANGEL. It is an extremely difficult state of affairs, but you have learned to cope. Your blood is of the PUREST SILVER, but you are often misunderstood as using grey to hide your identity. This is usually fine with you, seeing as Alternia's finest DISSEXECUTIONERS would jump at the chance to "study" your remarkable body.

Your hive is a RUINED SPIRE atop an ANCIENT MOUNTAIN, and you live with only your STEEL EAGLE LUSUS for company. You undertake self-assigned missions of CHARITY or DESTRUCTION, with equal interest and voracity, in the hopes of quenching your conflicting desires for peace and suffering. As of yet, you have not found your TRUE CALLING and ULTIMATE DESTINY. Lately, however, you have been having TROUBLING DREAMS that suggest that the time for revelations is nigh.

You have amassed many TREASURES over the course of your strange journeys, with the exception of the most valuable treasure of all: FRIENDSHIP. You have spent many sweeps in search of even the slightest spark of friendship with other trolls, but they usually fail to understand your condition and avoid you. Your supply of ANCIENT WEAPONS and OUFITS, as well as your impressive collection of CURSED/BLESSED ARTIFACTS has done little to console you.

You only rarely communicate with others via Trollian, but when you do, your trolltag is oblivionOathkeeper and your-HHaunting-laments-can-be-HHeard-ecHHoing-tHHrougHH-tHHe-mists-of-HHistory.

holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows

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>Be the coolest sunnuva bitch ever.



You are now CANNAB RESSIN... Yeah... CANNAB RESSIN, such an awesome name...

You are secretly a HALF DEMON, which explains your BLOODSHOT EYES, either that or you are stoned out of your mind, you can never really tell with you, because you are basically THE BIGGEST STONER on ALTERNIA, why? Because DRUGS are AWESOME!

You have very few interests, because you spend most of your time looking cool and getting high on substances including, but not limited to, SPICE, SPEED, LSD, MELANGE, MAPLE FLAVOURED OATMEAL, CHILDREN'S ADVIL, THE FIZZ BITCH (A drink you invented involving TROLL KOOL-AID and VITAMIN C TABLETS.), TURBO, NYQUIL, GOAT, ANTIFREEZE, WHITE SPIRITS, BOOZE, SUPER GLUE, YORKS, PINEAPPLE JUICE, LOVE, BUFFALO STEAK SANDVICHES, NUCLEAR WASTE, THE TROLL KOOLAID, DRAYTON, PANCAKE MIX, PAN-GALACTIC GARGLE BLASTERS, INK CARTRIDGES, WARHAMMER PAINT, NAIL POLISHER REMOVER, TEAM FORTRESS and PANTS.

You also like WALKING ON SUNSHINE and DRINKING FUCKLOADS OF MOONSHINE.

The VERY FEW INTERESTS you do have include BEING A LEVEL 20 LOVE MACHINE, being the meaning of THE WORD AWESOME, and PWNING N00BS AT THE VIDYA GAMES because the author likes to enforce his very few life wasting interests onto your character.

How you can do all this and not die, you don't know, it probably has something to do with your ULTRAVIOLET BLOOD, which is also probably the explanation for your EXTREMELY PALE SKIN. WHAT? You aren't any SCIENTIST! You are waaaaay to cool to be a damn SCIENTIST.

You go by holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows on TROLLIAN and you OH HOLY SHIT THE PRETTY COLOURS THE PRETTY COLOURS THEY MAKE YOU WANT TO SHOUT AND GENERALLY IGNORE PUNCTUATION AND GRAMMAR.

voraciousPretention

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>Be the motherfuckin' vampire.

You are now the motherfucking vampire.

>Enter name

>Motherfucking Vampire

DENIED
you know what... let's just do this the easy way.



this guy, he's telekinetic
Pyrokinetic
hyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyydrokinetic

brotha', he's Dreasde Verietling!



yes. Your name is DREASDE VERIETLING and you are a vampire. Not a rainbow drinker because that sounds stupid and girly. As was mentioned earlier you are telekinetic, pyrokinetic and hydrokinetic, but it's okay because you have no control of your arms and as such you must wear a strait jacket. Attached to your back is a set of roboarms with a WRIST COMMUNICATOR, which you fashioned yourself using your AWESOME SKILL AT BUILDING THINGS.
You do however, often get made fun of due to your bright red blood and terrifying mutant hair, which is bright blonde and shines with the ferocious might of a thousand radioactive anglerfish holding torches.
You have a variety of hobbies and interests, at which you are very skilled. These include FENCING, at which you are particularly adept, fighting in general (though not dishonourably) and engineering and building things, which you do often as recreation. You also enjoy feasting on the blood of those higher than you.

Your trolltag is voraciousPretention and you Talk-a viz-a zlight-a accent-a zat-a vaz-a picked-up-a vrom-a your luzuz-a.

DR

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Be the meta one

You are Kimiko Rai Hwi Obü. You are a self declared TROLLTAKU, because you're an edgy outsider who no one understands you don't totally comprehend the language of the culture you seek to emulate. You enjoy the cultural exports of the former EASTERN EMPIRE because it's like, so much better than everything else you got bored of local stuff. You are an avid ARTIST, with hundreds of a few watchers on TROLLVIANT ART, where you post all your OCs (original creation copyright DO NOT STEAL). Your area of expertise is you dabble in ROBOTICS, though the extent of your experience is basic TROLLDUINO and HACKING ROOMBAs. You picked your trolltag just for the shorthandle DR, and insist on being called Doctor. ʇǝuɐןd ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝpıs ɹǝɥʇo ǝɥʇ uo ǝɹ,noʎ ǝʞıן ʇxǝʇ ɹnoʎ ʇuǝıɹo noʎ \B].

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by MrBear

[Lieutenant Fish]

can I play?

EDIT: profile added!

> Be the conflicted crusader.

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Your name is Thamuz Gavrel

Due to a predestined ECTOBIOLOGY MISHAP, the full ramifications and reasons for which are on the verge of being revealed, you were hatched HALF DEMON and HALF ANGEL. It is an extremely difficult state of affairs, but you have learned to cope. Your blood is of the PUREST SILVER, but you are often misunderstood as using grey to hide your identity. This is usually fine with you, seeing as Alternia's finest DISSEXECUTIONERS would jump at the chance to "study" your remarkable body.

Your hive is a RUINED SPIRE atop an ANCIENT MOUNTAIN, and you live with only your STEEL EAGLE LUSUS for company. You undertake self-assigned missions of CHARITY or DESTRUCTION, with equal interest and voracity, in the hopes of quenching your conflicting desires for peace and suffering. As of yet, you have not found your TRUE CALLING and ULTIMATE DESTINY. Lately, however, you have been having TROUBLING DREAMS that suggest that the time for revelations is nigh.

You have amassed many TREASURES over the course of your strange journeys, with the exception of the most valuable treasure of all: FRIENDSHIP. You have spent many sweeps in search of even the slightest spark of friendship with other trolls, but they usually fail to understand your condition and avoid you. Your supply of ANCIENT WEAPONS and OUFITS, as well as your impressive collection of CURSED/BLESSED ARTIFACTS has done little to console you.

You only rarely communicate with others via Trollian, but when you do, your trolltag is oblivionOathkeeper and your-HHaunting-laments-can-be-HHeard-ecHHoing-tHHrougHH-tHHe-mists-of-HHistory.

[orngjce223]

-- prismaticGlimmer [PG] began a new memo "*team!sparklegrub!!!:D*". --

PG: *hi!guys!:D*
PG: *i!got!a!copy!of!this!awesome!!game!called!sgrub!!!:D*
PG: *anyone!else!want!to!play?:D*

[piester]

Meh, normally I am too cool for this shit but I am taking a break of being cool and smoking and stuff to rp.

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>Be the coolest sunnuva bitch ever.



You are now CANNAB RESSIN... Yeah... CANNAB RESSIN, such an awesome name...

You are secretly a HALF DEMON, which explains your BLOODSHOT EYES, either that or you are stoned out of your mind, you can never really tell with you, because you are basically THE BIGGEST STONER on ALTERNIA, why? Because DRUGS are AWESOME!

You have very few interests, because you spend most of your time looking cool and getting high on substances including, but not limited to, SPICE, SPEED, LSD, MELANGE, MAPLE FLAVOURED OATMEAL, CHILDREN'S ADVIL, THE FIZZ BITCH (A drink you invented involving TROLL KOOL-AID and VITAMIN C TABLETS.), TURBO, NYQUIL, GOAT, ANTIFREEZE, WHITE SPIRITS, BOOZE, SUPER GLUE, YORKS, PINEAPPLE JUICE, LOVE, BUFFALO STEAK SANDVICHES, NUCLEAR WASTE, THE TROLL KOOLAID, DRAYTON, PANCAKE MIX, PAN-GALACTIC GARGLE BLASTERS, INK CARTRIDGES, WARHAMMER PAINT, NAIL POLISHER REMOVER, TEAM FORTRESS and PANTS.

You also like WALKING ON SUNSHINE and DRINKING FUCKLOADS OF MOONSHINE.

The VERY FEW INTERESTS you do have include BEING A LEVEL 20 LOVE MACHINE, being the meaning of THE WORD AWESOME, and PWNING N00BS AT THE VIDYA GAMES because the author likes to enforce his very few life wasting interests onto your character.

How you can do all this and not die, you don't know, it probably has something to do with your ULTRAVIOLET BLOOD, which is also probably the explanation for your EXTREMELY PALE SKIN. WHAT? You aren't any SCIENTIST! You are waaaaay to cool to be a damn SCIENTIST.

You go by holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows on TROLLIAN and you OH HOLY SHIT THE PRETTY COLOURS THE PRETTY COLOURS THEY MAKE YOU WANT TO SHOUT AND GENERALLY IGNORE PUNCTUATION AND GRAMMAR.

[Lieutenant Fish]

--oblivionOathkeeper [OO] replied to memo--

OO: it-HHas-taken-mucHH-searcHHing
OO: but-I-HHave-finally-found-you
OO: tHHis-is-HHard-for-me-to-put-into-words-but
OO: I've-been-HHaving-dreams-about-tHHis-for-a-wHHile
OO: I-tHHink-we're-meant-to-play-tHHis-game-togetHHer-PG
OO: and-if-my-darkest-dreams-are-to-be-believed
OO: the-fate-of-tHHe-universe-HHangs-in-tHHe-balance
OO: HHow-do-I-begin?

[Solaris]

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Congratulations.
I died a little.
Can't wait to see more. Foooooooooooollloooooooow.

[piester]

--holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows [HT] replied to the memo--

HT: OH SWEET FUCKING HELL THE PRETTY COLOURS.
HT: PG WHY IS YOUR TEXT COLOUR SO FUCKING PURDY?
HT: I THINK IM IN LOVE.
HT: WITH YOU TEXT COLOUR THOUGH.
HT: BUT MAYBE YOU AS WELL DEPENDING ON HOW HOT YOU ARE.
HT: IM SURE AS HELL PLAYING SGRUB WITH YOU GUYS AS LONG AS I GET TO SEE MORE OF THE FUCKING RAINBOWS KNOWN AS PGS TEXT COLOUR.
HT: OR WOULD IT BE COLOURS IN THIS CASE?
HT: FUCK GRAMMER HURTS MY HEAD I NEED MORE ANTIFREEZE.

[MrBear]

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Oh gosh, This is Going to be AMAZING. I want to draw all of them now. I must. ' w'

[Elementoid]

I can't wait to see where this goes.

(And I still think PG looks like a BB troll)

[Dragoshi]

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This can only end amazingly.

Watchin' this so hard.

[Dalmationer]

oh this looks cool I can join plox? lol

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>Be the motherfuckin' vampire.

You are now the motherfucking vampire.

>Enter name

>Motherfucking Vampire

DENIED
you know what... let's just do this the easy way.



this guy, he's telekinetic
Pyrokinetic
hyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyydrokinetic

brotha', he's Dreasde Verietling!



yes. Your name is DREASDE VERIETLING and you are a vampire. Not a rainbow drinker because that sounds stupid and girly. As was mentioned earlier you are telekinetic, pyrokinetic and hydrokinetic, but it's okay because you have no control of your arms and as such you must wear a strait jacket. Attached to your back is a set of roboarms with a WRIST COMMUNICATOR, which you fashioned yourself using your AWESOME SKILL AT BUILDING THINGS.
You do however, often get made fun of due to your bright red blood and terrifying mutant hair, which is bright blonde and shines with the ferocious might of a thousand radioactive anglerfish holding torches.
You have a variety of hobbies and interests, at which you are very skilled. These include FENCING, at which you are particularly adept, fighting in general (though not dishonourably) and engineering and building things, which you do often as recreation. You also enjoy feasting on the blood of those higher than you.

Your trolltag is voraciousPretention and you Talk-a viz-a zlight-a accent-a zat-a vaz-a picked-up-a vrom-a your luzuz-a.

--voraciousPretention [VP] replied to the memo--
VP: Zo-a. You are starting-a zezzion-a of zizz-a game? I vould-a like-a to join you.
VP: I vazz-a avare-a zat zizz day-a vould-a come, and-a have been training vor-a it.
VP: I-a vill-a azzume zat-a you vill-a let me join-a, yes? Iv not-a, I vill have-a to try-a to purzuade-a izz.
VP: I vill-a ignore ze von-a who rezpondz above-a me.

[piester]

--holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows [HT] replied to the memo--

HT: I WOULDNT TALK TO THE PERSON WHO BANGED YOUR MOM LIKE THAT CHOCULA.
HT: WAIT OUR CULTURE PREVENTS US KNOWING WHO OUR ANCESTORS ARE.
HT: UHHHHHHHHHH.
HT: WELL THEN I BANGED YOUR CURRENT CARETAKER.
HT: DAMN IT THATS ALSO UNBANGABLE.
HT: WHY DO LUSI HAVE TO BE FUCKING DEVIL BEASTS?
HT: FUCK THIS SHIT, IM TOO IMPORTANT FOR YOU.
HT: I HAVE BUCKETS TO FILL WITH PEOPLE WHO I HOPE TO GOD ARE YOUR MOTHER YOU SON OF A FEMALE DOG LUSUS.
HT: AND WHEN THATS ALL DONE I WILL SHOW YOU ALL HOW TO WIN A FUCKING GAME.
HT: OH FUCK THE RAINBOWS ARE COMING BACKDJADADAFASEAWWDASDASDAFASFAASDASDAW.

[Lieutenant Fish]

OO: I-HHave-HHad-dreams-about-the-two-of-you-as-well
OO: PG-I-know-tHHere-is-notHHing-I-am-able-to-do-tHHat-will-cHHange-destiny
OO: but-I-would-be-remiss-in-my-future-obligations-if-I-didn't-at-least-urge-you-to-turn-tHHem-down
OO: your-noble-affinity-DESPICABLE-TENDENCY-towards-acceptance-will-override-my-request
OO: I-am-well-aware-of-tHHis
OO: but-tHHe-pain-tHHey-cause-will-take-tHHousands-of-sweeps-to-HHeal
OO: GLORIOUS-BLOODSHHED
OO: we're-all-meant-to-HHandle-tHHis-togetHHer-tHHougHH
OO: once-tHHe-otHHers-arrive
OO: I-await-your-instructions

[BewareOfNerd]

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I always wanted to try an experiment like this, but never got around to it. I will be watching this sparkly trainwreck closely. Do not disappoint me...

Loljk this is gonna be awesome. Plus one follower.

[Dalmationer]

VP: I find-a your mezzage cryptic and-a meaninglezz, and az zuch will dizregard it az-a ze ravingz-a ov a madman-a.
VP: I-a am-a dizztrezzed-a by ze-a witteringz-a of ze-a freakizh-a white-texted-a one-a.
VP: hizz-a idiozy-a clearly-a knowzz-a no boundz-a.
VP: regardlezz-a, I zuggezt-a zat-a ve-a prozeed-a az-a zoon-a az-a pozzible-a. I do not-a vizh-a to ztall-a any longer-a.
VP: I-a vill-a be back-a zoon. It appearz-a zat-a zomezing-a razer-a large-a juzzt-a crazhed-a into my-a hive.
voraciousPretention[VP] is now an idle troll.

[orngjce223]

> PG: Oi, wake up already -



zzz - oh!

> PG: Respond to your friends.

You tell the voice in your head to use more shout poles! Then you sit down and find out who came and talked to you while you were dreaming:

PG:*sorry!i!fell!asleep!*
PG:*i'll!only!let!you!play!if!you're!awesome!enough!!!*
PG:*but!i!think!i!remember!you!trolls!from!my!dreams!so!you!are!good!*
PG:*i'll!send!the!grubdata!now!!!:D*
-- prismaticGlimmer [PG] has sent file sgrub!!.grb --
-- Accept file? (Y/N) --

[Lieutenant Fish]

> Accept transfer


A sane observer might say that thHHis-is-HHardly-tHHe-time-for-HHeroics.
Fortunately, no such observer exists.

[Lieutenant Fish]

A young demon loses track of his own words, and begins to wonder if he imagined an entire conversation.

--oblivionOathkeeper [OO] began trolling holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows [HT]--

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OO: HHello-HHT. I-HHave-a-proposition-for-you-to-tHHink-about
HT: NO
OO: you-HHaven't-HHeard-it-yet
OO: you-migHHt-find-it-cHHarming
HT: I ALREADY KNOW WHAT YOU ARE GOING TO SAY.
HT: AT LEAST I THINK I DO.
OO: alrigHHt-tHHen-wHHat-am-I-going-to-say
OO: please-enligHHten-me
HT: OH HAI CAN I HAVE YOUR GRUBS?
OO: tHHat-is-incorrect.
HT: WAS I RIGHT?
HT: FUCK.
OO: If-you-give-me-a-cHHance-I’m-sure-you-won’t-be-unHHappy-about-it
HT: FINE BUT GOD ILL NEVER LET YOU SPEAK NEAR ME AGAIN UNLESS THIS IS AWESOME.
OO: I-would-like-to-be tHHe-first player-to-enter-tHHis-game-in-order-to-ensure-tHHe-sHHelter-of-our-cHHief.
HT: OOH RIGHT THE GAME
HT: I WAS WONDERING WHO YOU WERE AND WHY YOU WERE TALKING TO ME.
OO: HHowever-my-connection-is-somewHHat-patHHetic-from-tHHe-summit-of-tHHis-mountain-and-it-may-be-a-wHHile-before-I-am-ready-to-participate.
OO: my-request-is-tHHus:
OO: if-you-are-entHHusiastic-to-rescHHedule-your-entrance-until-I-am-ready-I-will-excHHange-one-of-my-many-arcHHaic-artifacts-witHH-you-when-we-meet.
HT: TO HAVE MY GRUBS?
HT: OH.
HT: NEAT.
HT: NOT GRUBS BUT STILL.
OO: please-do-not-take-my-offer-ligHHtly
OO: I-am-HHoping-to-bring-tHHe-patHH-of-events-into-tHHe-proper-direction-and-HHave-little-to-offer-tHHe-otHHers-at-tHHis-time
HT: I HAVE ENOUGH GRUBS ANYWAYS.
HT: WHAT TYPE OF ARTIFACT?
HT: ARE WE TALKING OLD ROTTEN BOX?
HT: OR MORE LIKE SOME SORT OF 1000-SWEEP-OLD PARTICLE ACCELERATOR
OO: I-HHave-a-modest-selection-I-will-allow-you-to-cHHoose-one
OO: trust-me-wHHen-I-say-I-will-make-cooperation-wortHH-your-wHHile
OO: you-HHave-my-word
OO: as-well-as-my-tHHanks
OO: wHHen-the-time-is-rigHHt-I-will-contact-you-and-you-can-begin-tHHe-game.
OO: for-now-I-must-close-tHHis-program-to-conserve-bandwidtHH
HT: ALRIGHT MAN PEACE

--oblivionOathkeeper [OO] ceased trolling holysweetfuckingjesusTherainbowstherainbows [HT]--

[Dalmationer]

>VP: accept transfer.

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Wait... Someone pesters you at this most critical of moments!


>Answer

-- oblivionOathkeeper [OO] began trolling voraciousPretention [VP] --

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OO: -HHello.-
VP: vat-a do you vant-a?
OO: -I-HHave-sometHHing-to-ask-of-you-
VP: really-a?
VP: and vat-a vould-a zat-a be?
OO: -in-tHHis-game-we-are-about-to-play,-eacHH-player-will-HHave-control-over-anotHHer-
OO: -eventually-forming-a-compreHHensive-circle
OO: -tHHe-order-depends-on-wHHo-enters-first-
OO: -I-would-like-to-be-tHHe-second-to-enter,-but-tHHe-file-transfer-is-taking-a-long-time-
OO: -look,-
OO: -I-won't-beat-around-tHHe-busHH-HHere-
OO: -I-don't- trust -you-witHH-tHHe-safety-of-our-leader-
OO: -would-you-consider-waiting?-
VP: and-a who-a vould-a zat-be? Our leader-a zat-a iz?
OO: -PG-
VP: I-a zee-a.
OO: -sHHe's-going-to-be-in-danger-soon-
OO: -I-want-to-be-tHHere-to-HHelp-
VP: I can azzure-a you zat-a your miztruzt-a iz-a mizzpent-a.
OO: -and-I-can-assure-you-tHHat-if-tHHere's-one-tHHing-I've-learned-over-tHHe-past-200-sweeps-
OO: -it's-tHHat-only-tHHe-pure-of-HHeart-are-capable-of-trust-
OO: -wHHicHH-is-nietHHer-of-us-
VP: If-a her zafety-a iz-a zo-a paramount-a, zen zurely the tazk zhould-a be entruzted-a to ze-a vone-a who-a iz-a mozt-a capable?
OO: -of-course-
OO: -but-tHHe-only-person-I'll-ever-trust-
OO: -is-myself-
VP: I have-a been through-a ze-a vires-a of ze-a undervorld-a itzelf-a and remained untainted.
VP: I-a azzure-a you my heart iz-a "pure".
OO: -perHHaps-so-
OO: but-I've-seen-you-in-my-dreams.-
VP: iz-a ziz-a what-a ziz-a iz-a all about-a?
VP: you-a dream-a about-a me?
VP: I am-a flattered, but I vill-a not give up my plaze-a
OO: -I've-seen-you-do-HHORRIBLE-THHINGS-
OO: -tHHe-kind-of-wHHicHH-I-cannot-allow-
VP: horrible-a iz-a defined-a by-a ze-a majority-a
VP: I-a vazz-a juztified-a antvay
VP: You-a have-a not been-a zhrough-a vat-a I have-a.
VP: Zeen-a ze terrorz-a zat-a haunt me in ze night.
OO: -and-you-
OO: -HHave-not-been-tHHrougHH-
OO: -WHHAT-I-HHAVE-

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OO: -LISTEN-UP-
VP: hm-a?
OO: -IN-ALL-PROBABILITY,-I-AM-ONE-OF-THHOSE-TERRORS-
OO: -AND-YOU-ARE-STANDING-IN-THHE-WAY-OF-EVENTS-THHAT-I-KNOW-MUST-BE-ALLOWED-TO-HHAPPEN-
OO: -DO-NOT-ASSUME-FOR-EVEN-A-MOMENT-THHAT-I-WILL-NOT-TAKE-ACTION-AGAINST-YOU-
VP: ahahahah.
VP: you-a do not-a zcare-a me.
OO: -YOU-DO-NOT-KNOW-ME-
VP: neizer you me.
OO: -DELAY-YOUR-CONNECTION-TO-THHE-GAME-OR-YOU-WILL-REGRET-IT-FOR-THHE-REST-OF-YOUR-TORTUOUS-LIFE-
VP: ahahah.
VP: I-a vill-a do no-a zuch-a zing.
OO: -tHHen-tHHere-is-notHHing-more-to-be-said-
VP: indeed-a
VP: it'z-a on-a >B[)
OO: -I-will-contact-PG,-and-convince-HHer-to-ignore-your-advances-
OO: -sHHe-will-listen-
OO: -and-if-not-
OO: -we-will-meet-someday-
VP: ahahah.
VP: I-a look-a vorward-a to-a it.
OO: -tHHis-is-not-a-retreat-
VP: ahahah.

-- oblivionOathkeeper [OO] ceased trolling voraciousPretention [VP] --

[ProfessorLizzard]

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OJ, this thread is so beautiful.

[Sprak]

Hey, can I play?

Be the meta one

You are Kimiko Rai Hwi Obü. You are a self declared TROLLTAKU, because you're an edgy outsider who no one understands you don't totally comprehend the language of the culture you seek to emulate. You enjoy the cultural exports of the former EASTERN EMPIRE because it's like, so much better than everything else you got bored of local stuff. You are an avid ARTIST, with hundreds of a few watchers on TROLLVIANT ART, where you post all your OCs (original creation copyright DO NOT STEAL). Your area of expertise is you dabble in ROBOTICS, though the extent of your experience is basic TROLLDUINO and HACKING ROOMBAs. You picked your trolltag just for the shorthandle DR, and insist on being called Doctor. ʇǝuɐןd ǝɥʇ ɟo ǝpıs ɹǝɥʇo ǝɥʇ uo ǝɹ,noʎ ǝʞıן ʇxǝʇ ɹnoʎ ʇuǝıɹo noʎ \B].

[Lieutenant Fish]

How are they going to read that text?

[Dalmationer]

and then PG was the JU-ON. Forever.

[piester]

>Cannab: BE TOO DISTRACTED BY STUPID STUFF TO REPLY TO THE MEMO.


You go to the top of your RESORT HIVE and confront your OLD NEMESIS, MR. METEOR.

"AH MR METEOR WE MEET AGAIN."

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"EXCEPT THIS TIME ITS MUCH DIFFERENT."



"THIS TIME I HAVE A MOTHERFUCKING GUN."



"A GOD DAMN."



"MOTHERFUCKING."



"GUN OH FUCK MY EARLOBES FUCK FUCK FUCK WHY ARE GUNS SO LOUD?"





MR. METEOR is stopped in his tracks from the damage THE TINY PIECES OF SOME OF THE MOST BREAKABLE ELEMENTS ON THE ELEMENTAL TABLE caused, even if you went PARTIALLY DEAF in the process! You can now chat in peace with your TOTALLY AWESOME FUCKING FRIENDS!"