Since what you're proposing sounds AO3 specific, I probably won't post the entire cheat sheet in the first post, but I'll link it.
Edit: Oh wait, I misread what you were saying. I think I know what you're talking about now. Still, if it ends up taking up too much space in the original post I think it would be best to link it anyway.
It'd be linked on my Bro journal. Which means everyone has to suffer through that hideous username.
...
On second thought maybe I'll put it on David Lalonde's journal :|
She slides into time again, F minor seventh chord, something she's done a thousand times, through the loops and whorls of paradox space. One last rewind, she promised herself, to fix her session yet again. Sarah and Ryan and Jonas, torn to ribbons because some idiot was on the sidewalk in front of Ryan's house and got pulled into the session too.
She entered first, she should have time to stop this from happening.
Sliding back into time, and the sensation - of paradox space itself turning against you - is unmistakable. Subtle, perhaps, but unmistakable.
She stows her time-piano and steps out into the shimmering twilight of her own land, pulls out her Pesterglasses.
-- laconicCuriosity [LC] began pestering contemplativeLunatic [CL] --
LC: Ryan?
No response.
A well-placed stone trips her as she walks.
The probability shift is slow at first. Stones, stray Underlings, a Dersite, perhaps. If she evades these, the probabilities could continue to stack - too long avoiding her fate and she could end up the victim of a stray brain aneurysm or blood clot.
LC: For the love of paradox space, Ryan, will you pick up???
No response.
She proceeds to her house, avoiding the high wires she would've taken had she not been doomed. The ground is a far longer path, but slightly more reliable.
She could fall, and break something important, and not be able to move until she gets stomped upon by a giclops. Even the Consorts will not help a doomed player; the aura of un-luck is almost palpable in its intensity after some time has passed.
Her glasses flash back at her.
CC: What
CL: What is so urgent
LC: Before you enter, you need the sidewalk outside your house to be clear.
LC: Make sure nobody is there!
LC: This is a life-or-death situation here, Ryan!
CL: If you insist
LC: Yes, I insist!
-- contemplativeLunatic [CL] has ceased pestering laconicCuriosity [LC] --
Will it be enough? There's only one way to know. And Sarah had given her that way, so long ago.
She proceeds to her front door, unlocks the basement. Adjusts the Sendificator.
Reaching out with a long spear from the platform, she pushes the large button.
A wooden shaft clatters to the floor, the hand that grasped it now gone through time and space.
----
The streets of Earth again, Milwaukee to be precise. She cannot run, so she walks as quickly as she dares. There is no time for feelings, she tells herself. She must do her job, and then she will die.
A car, feet away from her, is hit by a meteor and plows into the nearest building. The alarms go off. It's a dissonant, blaring tritone from an actual horn; then come the alarm bells.
Ryan's house up ahead, with a flickering Sburb cursor and strange machinery on the porch, and - yes - the random idiot deciding that he would rather die taking a walk than in his own house.
She begins to run.
A flash of white, and the house is gone in front of her. And neither of them stopped it from happening.
If this was a stable time loop, why was she doomed? What was the probability of -
A hat slowly flutters to the ground on a current of dying warm air.
Last edited by orngjce223; 03-08-2011 at 05:09 PM.
Disclaimer: I've never looked in on this thread before. Apologies if I'm inadvertently being rude by posing my question.
Does the latest installation of Red Dead Virgo indicate a crossover with lucidseraph's AU? It certainly seems like it. However, it seems like MSPAchan is dead. Will the rest of RDV and the crossover be on AO3?
The writer of RDV doesn't come here (much? at all?) as far as I know. I haven't kept track of this thread since thread IV though so that might have changed.
I would think a crossover is unlikely, but who knows?
I thought lucidSeraph was working within the RDV universe, only focusing on the kids instead of the trolls? That was what I think I read, at least. I don't think they collaborate anything, but hey, maybe.
@Raikonos: Wow, that was really good. (And so long, holy cow. Good to know someone else writes in size 9 font.) I really hope Davesprite is actually in a bubble somewhere because I want more of him. Awesome job.
Seventeen computers were loaded up with the best nation game simulator ever, painstakingly alchemized from the various games of the genre until it turned into a perfect test of rulership abilities.
Seventeen screens were displaying a planet bereft of life, mushroom clouds settling down over poisoned continents.
GA: Well That Went Better
GA: Not Good
GA: But Better
The kids, trolls, and sprite nodded in various states of dissatisfaction (except for Terezi, who was still trying to get the taste of radioactive fallout off her tongue).
CA: honestly its probably good that we nevver ended up takin anythin ovver
CA: because im thinkin this is about the outcome wwe wwould get there too
GA: Perhaps
GA: Do You Think You Know What You Did Wrong
CA: yeah
CA: get randomly plopped dowwn next to kar
CA: there wwas pretty much no wway that wwasnt going to end in a couple a wwars
GA: Still
GA: You Are To Be Commended That Your Populace Did Not Attempt Another Violent Uprising
GA: Try To Remember What You Did To Prevent That
CA: apparently the population is susceptible to not gettin randomly culled and brutally repressed
CA: wwe should really fix that exploit
Several of the people in the room facepalmed. Several others, however, nodded quiet agreement. The state of politics was still in something of a flux.
TT: While Eridan’s performance is not the only one that’s gone up, clearly we still aren’t managing to run a world the way it should be run.
TT: Let’s go over what we did wrong, shall we?
EB: okay, i think the thing that got us in the end was raising tensions.
EB: and then when we tried to back down from a war we found we couldn’t do it without losing an absolutely preposterous amount of prestige.
TT: Obviously, yes.
TT: But if we had conducted ourselves properly, things should never have reached that point.
GA: I For One Feel Like The Alliance System Made Things Worse By Making Sure That If Anyone Started Fighting Everyone Would
AT: sORRY,
AT: iT’S JUST THAT EVERYONE WAS GETTING MEAN,
AT: sO I THOGHT THAT MAYBE WORKING TOGETHER WOULD HELP,
AT: bUT I DON’T THINK IT HELPED AT ALL, }:(
GG: i still say the Tanglebuddies League was a good idea!
CC: It was fun while it lasted, at least!
TT: More than can be said for the Adorabloodthirsty Alliance.
GC: H3Y!
GC: FOR YOUR 1NFORM4T1ON SOM3 OF US W3R3 H4V1NG 4 BL4ST >:]
GC: 1T’S H4RDLY OUR F4ULT 1F C3RT41N M3MB3RS SP3NT TH3 WHOL3 T1M3 GRUMBL1NG
AC: :33 < *maybe next time you can be on Team FURrocious!*
GA: You Arent Listening
GA: The Alliances Were Not Helpful
GA: Is That Not Clear
GA: Do You Require More Radioactive Dust
CT: D --> I don’t believe we sh001d give up on the idea entirely
CT: D --> Just because the e%ecution proved flawed does not necessarily mean the concept is fundamentally negative
AG: You are in no position to 8ound superior!
AG: You were the aggressor!
CT: D --> You cut off strategically important supplies
CT: D --> I was prepared to ensure my people w001d receive the goods they needed
CT: D --> Even if it meant yours w001d die
AA: and h0w did that w0rk 0ut f0r 0ur pe0ple
CT: D --> They’re dead
AA: s0 what did we learn
CT: D --> Ne%t time we will develop resource independence from the start
CT: D --> Relying on rogue states for supplies is too uncertain
AA: cl0se en0ugh f0r n0w
TT: The worldwide financial crisis certainly did nothing to help the situation.
TG: hey i cant help it if it turns out im awesome at picking stocks even without time loops
TT: Thinking of consequences of your actions beyond those most immediate might have helped, though.
TG: the thing about playing this game with someone who knows all of my moves
TG: is that one of us was going to cause this crisis but get fabulously wealthy in the process
TG: i figured it might as well be me
TT: It wasn’t quite so simple, though, was it?
TG: there is really no evidence that both of us doing this made things any worse than if only one of us had tried it
TA: that2 debatable
TA: iif there2 anythiing ii learned
TA: iit2 that doubliing up on thiings tend2 not two make them better
GA: Congratulations Must Go To Gamzee For Managing To Forestall Several Conflicts
AC: :33 < *ac has never seen such skillful auspisticizing!*
AC: :33 < *she is halfway tempted to go ashen for someone just to see that again!*
GA: Do You Remember How Attempting To Let Gamzee Sort Out All Conflicts Ended Up
TC: ThErE WeRe jUsT ToO MaNy mOtHeRfUcKeRs aLl tAlKiNg aT OnCe!
TC: SoMeTiMeS A DuDe jUsT HaS To cHiLl oUt aNd tAkE A BrEaK
GG: you did your best gamzee!
CG: UGH.
CG: IF YOU MORONS ARE QUITE FINISHED RESTING ON YOUR PILE OF FAILURES
CG: THE NEW SESSION CAN BE RUN NOW.
CG: HOW ABOUT THIS TIME WE TRY NOT TO FUCK UP QUITE SO MUCH?
CG: IS THAT JUST TOO MUCH TO ASK?
Grumbling or squealing, stoically nodding or waving their arms in the air, the players returned to their designated stations.
AG: Ha!
AG: I’m on top of the world’s largest oil field again!
AG: Deal with it, Equius! ::::D
CT: D --> You will notice my position is on the other side of the globe
CT: D --> As far as I’m concerned that’s not nearly far enough
AT: wE CAN SHARE MY OIL FOR A WHILE,
AT: aND THEN MAYBE THIS TIME WE WILL ACTUALLY GET TO THE VIABLE CLEAN ENERGY,
CT: D --> Thank you
CT: D --> That is appreciated
AA: l00ks like im farther away fr0m y0u this time
AA: i d0ubt we will be able t0 c0llab0rate as cl0sely
TA: and of cour2e ii end up riight next two you.
TA: ii2 iit okay iif we collaborate iin2tead or wiill that cau2e equi2 two ju2t 2ort of 2iit there and 2tare at me?
TA: becau2e ii dont thiink any of u2 want that.
CT: D --> You think you make me jealous
CT: D --> The very 100dicrousness of the notion amuses me
AA: guys!
AA: just h0w is this never bringing it up again?
TA: 2orry.
CT: D --> My apologies, dear
CG: CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO ONE FUCKING GAME WITHOUT THIS CONVERSATION?
CG: WE HAVE A WHOLE PLANET TO OURSELVES.
CG: AND HELL, PROBABLY THE REST OF THE UNIVERSE TOO.
CG: THAT IS LITERALLY INFINITE SPACE FOR CONVERSATIONS LIKE THIS TO HAPPEN IN.
CG: AND YET THE ONLY PLACE THEY EVER ACTUALLY OCCUR IS WHEREVER I HAPPEN TO BE.
CG: SO WOULD EVERYONE KINDLY JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP?!
CC: NOP---E!
CC: T)(is is not the time for s)(utting up!
CC: T)(is is time for friendly conversations between friends!
CC: Glub glub!
CC: (Also I guess between LOV-----ERS! 38D!!! )
CG: YOU ARE SAYING THAT JUST TO ANNOY ME.
CC: Is it working? 38?
CG: WELL, YES.
CG: BUT THAT’S SORT OF LIKE SAYING SOMETHING TO MAKE JADE HAPPY OR TO MAKE TEREZI MENTION HOW COLORS TASTE.
CG: IT’S NOT THAT MUCH OF A CHALLENGE IS ALL I’M SAYING.
GC: 1T’S TRU3!
GC: W1TH K4RKL3S YOU H4V3 TO GO FOR TH3 MOR3 1NTR1C4T3 3MOT1ON4L TORTUR3S
GC: SOM3TH1NG SUBTL3
GC: OTH3RW1S3 1T’S NO CH4LL3NG3 WH4TSO3V3R!
CC: )(a)(a, yea)(!
TT: Pay attention, everyone.
TT: We don’t want to end up with total wipeout in the first five minutes again.
CA: howw many times do i havve to say my bad
TG: about thirty more should do it i think
TG: but better make it fifty just to be on the safe side
CA: yeah
CA: sounds about right for dealin wwith girls
TG: wow way to keep the pending apology count up
CA: oh i am apologizin to fef and kan all the time anywway
CA: addin one more person to the list wwont hurt
EB: um, rose?
EB: remind me what im supposed to do about taxes?
TT: We’ve been over this time and again, John.
TT: But all right, I’m coming.
AT: yOU KNOW,
AT: i THINK I HAVE COME UP WITH A NEW STRATEGY FOR DEALING WITH LABOR DISPUTES,
One hour later, seventeen screens showed a cracked globe; its continents physically destroyed, and its molten innards spilling out into space.
GA: I Suppose This Counts As Progress
Last edited by SeptimusMagistos; 03-08-2011 at 07:05 PM.
Seventeen computers were loaded up with the best nation game simulator ever, painstakingly alchemized from the various games of the genre until it turned into a perfect test of rulership abilities.
Seventeen screens were displaying a planet bereft of life, mushroom clouds settling down over poisoned continents.
GA: Well That Went Better
GA: Not Good
GA: But Better
The kids, trolls, and sprite nodded in various states of dissatisfaction (except for Terezi, who was still trying to get the taste of radioactive fallout off her tongue).
CA: honestly its probably good that we nevver ended up takin anythin ovver
CA: because im thinkin this is about the outcome wwe wwould get there too
GA: Perhaps
GA: Do You Think You Know What You Did Wrong
CA: yeah
CA: get randomly plopped dowwn next to kar
CA: there wwas pretty much no wway that wwasnt going to end in a couple of wwars
GA: Still
GA: You Are To Be Commended That Your Populace Did Not Attempt Another Violent Uprising
GA: Try To Remember What You Did To Prevent That
CA: apparently the population is susceptible to not gettin randomly culled and brutally repressed
CA: wwe should really fix that exploit
Several of the people in the room facepalmed. Several others, however, nodded quiet agreement. The state of politics was still in something of a flux.
TT: While Eridan’s performance is not the only one that’s gone up, clearly we still aren’t managing to run a world the way it should be run.
TT: Let’s go over what we did wrong, shall we?
EB: okay, i think the thing that got us in the end was raising tensions.
EB: and then when we tried to back down from a war we found we couldn’t do it without losing an absolutely preposterous amount of prestige.
TT: Obviously, yes.
TT: But if we had conducted ourselves properly, things should never have reached that point.
GA: I For One Feel Like The Alliance System Made Things Worse By Making Sure That If Anyone Started Fighting Everyone Would
AT: sORRY,
AT: iT’S JUST THAT EVERYONE WAS GETTING MEAN,
AT: sO I THOGHT THAT MAYBE WORKING TOGETHER WOULD HELP,
AT: bUT I DON’T THINK IT HELPED AT ALL, }
GG: i still say the Tanglebuddies League was a good idea!
CC: It was fun while it lasted, at least!
TT: More than can be said for the Adorabloodthirsty Alliance.
GC: H3Y!
GC: FOR YOUR 1NFORM4T1ON SOM3 OF US W3R3 H4V1NG 4 BL4ST >:]
GC: 1T’S H4RDLY OUR F4ULT 1F C3RT41N M3MB3RS SP3NT TH3 WHOL3 T1M3 GRUMBL1NG
AC: :33 < *maybe next time you can be on Team FURrocious!*
GA: You Arent Listening
GA: The Alliances Were Not Helpful
GA: Is That Not Clear
GA: Do You Require More Radioactive Dust
CT: D --> I don’t believe we sh001d give up on the idea entirely
CT: D --> Just because the e%ecution proved flawed does not necessarily mean the concept is fundamentally negative
AG: You are in no position to 8ound superior!
AG: You were the aggressor!
CT: D --> You cut off strategically important supplies
CT: D --> I was prepared to ensure my people w001d receive the goods they needed
CT: D --> Even if it meant yours w001d die
AA: and h0w did that w0rk 0ut f0r 0ur pe0ple
CT: D --> They’re dead
AA: s0 what did we learn
CT: D --> Ne%t time we will develop resource independence from the start
CT: D --> Relying on rogue states for supplies is too uncertain
AA: cl0se en0ugh f0r n0w
TT: The worldwide financial crisis certainly did nothing to help the situation.
TG: hey i cant help it if it turns out im awesome at picking stocks even without time loops
TT: Thinking of consequences of your actions beyond those most immediate might have helped, though.
TG: the thing about playing this game with someone who knows all of my moves
TG: is that one of us was going to cause this crisis but get fabulously wealthy in the process
TG: i figured it might as well be me
TT: It wasn’t quite so simple, though, was it?
TG: there is really no evidence that both of us doing this made things any worse than if only one of us had tried it
TA: that2 debatable
TA: iif there2 anythiing ii learned
TA: iit2 that doubliing up on thiings tend2 not two make them better
GA: Congratulations Must Go To Gamzee For Managing To Forestall Several Conflicts
AC: :33 < *ac has never seen such skillful auspisticizing!*
AC: :33 < *she is halfway tempted to go ashen for someone just to see that again!*
GA: Do You Remember How Attempting To Let Gamzee Sort Out All Conflicts Ended Up
TC: ThErE WeRe jUsT ToO MaNy mOtHeRfUcKeRs aLl tAlKiNg aT OnCe!
TC: SoMeTiMeS A DuDe jUsT HaS To cHiLl oUt aNd tAkE A BrEaK
GG: you did your best gamzee!
CG: UGH.
CG: IF YOU MORONS ARE QUITE FINISHED RESTING ON YOUR PILE OF FAILURES
CG: THE NEW SESSION CAN BE RUN NOW.
CG: HOW ABOUT THIS TIME WE TRY NOT TO FUCK UP QUITE SO MUCH?
CG: IS THAT JUST TOO MUCH TO ASK?
Grumbling or squealing, stoically nodding or waving their arms in the air, the players returned to their designated stations.
AG: Ha!
AG: I’m on top of the world’s largest oil field again!
AG: Deal with it, Equius! :::
CT: D --> You will notice my position is on the other side of the globe
CT: D --> As far as I’m concerned that’s not nearly far enough
AT: wE CAN SHARE MY OIL FOR A WHILE,
AT: aND THEN MAYBE THIS TIME WE WILL ACTUALLY GET TO THE VIABLE CLEAN ENERGY,
CT: D --> Thank you
CT: D --> That is appreciated
AA: l00ks like im farther away fr0m y0u this time
AA: i d0ubt we will be able t0 c0llab0rate as cl0sely
TA: and of cour2e ii end up riight next two you.
TA: ii2 iit okay iif we collaborate iin2tead or wiill that cau2e equi2 two ju2t 2ort of 2iit there and 2tare at me?
TA: becau2e ii dont thiink any of u2 want that.
CT: D --> You think you make me jealous
CT: D --> The very 100dicrousness of the notion amuses me
AA: guys!
AA: just h0w is this never bringing it up again?
TA: 2orry.
CT: D --> My apologies, dear
CG: CAN WE PLEASE JUST GO ONE FUCKING GAME WITHOUT THIS CONVERSATION?
CG: WE HAVE A WHOLE PLANET TO OURSELVES.
CG: AND HELL, PROBABLY THE REST OF THE UNIVERSE TOO.
CG: THAT IS LITERALLY INFINITE SPACE FOR CONVERSATIONS LIKE THIS TO HAPPEN IN.
CG: AND YET THE ONLY PLACE THEY EVER ACTUALLY OCCUR IS WHEREVER I HAPPEN TO BE.
CG: SO WOULD EVERYONE KINDLY JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP?!
CC: NOP---E!
CC: T)(is is not the time for s)(utting up!
CC: T)(is is time for friendly conversations between friends!
CC: Glub glub!
CC: (Also I guess between LOV-----ERS! 38D!!! )
CG: YOU ARE SAYING THAT JUST TO ANNOY ME.
CC: Is it working? 38?
CG: WELL, YES.
CG: BUT THAT’S SORT OF LIKE SAYING SOMETHING TO MAKE JADE HAPPY OR TO MAKE TEREZI MENTION HOW COLORS TASTE.
CG: IT’S NOT THAT MUCH OF A CHALLENGE IS ALL I’M SAYING.
GC: 1T’S TRU3!
GC: W1TH K4RKL3S YOU H4V3 TO GO FOR TH3 MOR3 1NTR1C4T3 3MOT1ON4L TORTUR3S
GC: SOM3TH1NG SUBTL3
GC: OTH3RW1S3 1T’S NO CH4LL3NG3 WH4TSO3V3R!
CC: )(a)(a, yea)(!
TT: Pay attention, everyone.
TT: We don’t want to end up with total wipeout in the first five minutes again.
CA: howw many times do i havve to say my bad
TG: about thirty more should do it i think
TG: but better make it fifty just to be on the safe side
CA: yeah
CA: sounds about right for dealin wwith girls
TG: wow way to keep the pending apology count up
CA: oh i am apologizin to fef and kan all the time anywway
CA: addin one more person to the list wwont hurt
EB: um, rose?
EB: remind me what im supposed to do about taxes?
TT: We’ve been over this time and again, John.
TT: But all right, I’m coming.
AT: yOU KNOW,
AT: i THINK I HAVE COME UP WITH A NEW STRATEGY FOR DEALING WITH LABOR DISPUTES,
One hour later, seventeen screens showed a cracked globe; its continents physically destroyed, and its molten innards spilling out into space.
I need to go back and read gaaaah -has been lazy the last few days-
Anyway, have some more Wizardstuck.
Wizardstuck: Libraryquest
All Rose wanted to do was go to the library.
It shouldn't have been a difficult thing to do. It was lazy Saturday afternoon, with no classes and no homework she had left to do. Few people were outside wandering the grounds, since it was also raining steadily, and it just seemed like a perfect day to hole herself up in the corner of the library and read a book.
It had all started when she left her dorm and attempted to cross the common room. She was passing the study area with a book under her arm when she heard a familiar voice.
"Oh, Rose! Would you mind helping me for a moment?" If it had been anyone other than Kanaya, she would have said she was busy and left. Instead, Rose heaved a mental sigh and turned with a slightly bemused smile.
"With what, pray tell?" She asked, although the answer was obvious once she got a look at her friend. Kanaya was sitting at a desk with fabric and various utensils spread out. Draped before her on the table was something black and green. Kanaya smiled.
"I'm almost done with this cloak," she said. "I just need someone to model it for me, to make sure it falls correctly." She looked at Rose pleadingly. The girl sighed.
"Oh, alright," Rose conceded, setting the book down on an empty desk. "But then I need to go to the library."
"It'll only take a moment," Kanaya assured her. She swept up the cloak in her arms and carefully drew it around Rose. The human girl stood as still as she could while Kanaya carefully tied it around her neck and then took a step back, looking with a practiced eye. Rose fiddled with the edges of the cloak, pulling them around her, as Kanaya scrutinized her. The craftsmanship was impeccable as always—aside from the fact that the inside of the cloak was a beautiful jade green rather than the traditional black and the bottom of the outside was embroidered with jade leaves and vines, Rose would not have been able to tell it apart from one professionally made. Kanaya was truly a master at her craft.
"Spin, please," Kanaya said finally, twirling a finger in the air. Rose gave her a mischievous grin and spun quickly, letting the cloak billow around her. She stopped when she heard Kanaya's quiet laughter.
"A little slower, if you don't mind," the troll said with a smile.
"Oh, alright," Rose conceded, and she turned more slowly. Kanaya stopped her a few times, peering closely at this or that and muttering under her breath, but after about ten minutes of this, she allowed Rose to take the cloak off.
"Thank you," she said as she set the cloak back on the table. "I still have some adjustments, but it is mostly finished."
"It's beautiful," Rose replied. "All the students will be clamoring for them before you know it. You'll be starting a fashion trend." Kanaya looked up at that, startled.
"... A trend? In fashion?"
"Of course," Rose said with a smile. "I've told you, humans are far more fashion conscious than trolls." Kanaya's whole face seemed to light up.
"Oh! I didn't even think of that! I... I might have to make more of these!" She sat down quickly. She took out a scrap of parchment and a quill and began scribbling numbers and doing calculations. Rose assumed these had something to do with the amount of fabric needed for the cloaks and left her to it.
She might just have to request one for herself before it was all said and done with.
Regardless, the library was more important just then. Hopefully, she would be able to leave the common room without any more interruptions—
"Rose!" The call of joy was the only warning Rose had before she was tackled from behind. Arms encircled her torso, cutting off any means of escape, and she heard giggling in her ears. Rose sighed.
"Is this really necessary, Jade? I just saw you this morning."
"But it's been hours since then!" The black-haired girl released her nonetheless, and Rose turned to face her. Jade had a hopeful grin on her face, which spelled nothing but trouble.
"What do you want, Jade? I was on my way to the library." Jade's face fell immediately.
"Oh. I was hoping you'd want to play in the rain with me!" Rose simply stared at her like she was insane.
"I'm sorry, Jade, but I don't particularly want to romp outside in the cold and the damp, thank you," she said tersely. Jade's face fell even more, prompting Rose to come up with another plan. "But Feferi might. Why don't you go ask her?" At that, Jade brightened again.
"Why didn't I think of that? Feferi loves water! Thanks, Rose!" Without another word, Jade dashed off through the portrait hole. Once she was gone, Rose paused and gave the common room another cursory glance. She didn't see anyone else who might try to stop her. Aradia was gone, Kanaya was now working on the alterations to her cloak, and no one else was likely to bother her. Heaving a sigh of relief, Rose finally left.
The Ravenclaw dormitory was thankfully close to the library. Whether that was a part of the original design plan or a happy coincidence, no one could say, but it suited the Ravenclaws just fine. All Rose had to do was go up a floor and the library was practically right there. As she began to ascend the stairs, however, she heard a yell from above.
"W-WATCH OUT!"
"HELL YEAH, MOTHERFUCKER!"
Rose looked up to see Tavros and Gamzee barreling towards her on Tavros's hover chair. She managed to leap to the other side of the staircase just in time as they flew past her. She thought for sure that they would crash or hit a wall once they had reached the bottom of the stairs, but, to her astonishment, they slowed down instantly once they hit level ground. It must have been something in the magic of the chair. When they did, she saw that Gamzee was in fact straddling the back of the chair with his feet on the arm rests. Once on level ground, he fell backwards to the floor and laughed.
"Whoa, motherfucker, that was a motherfucking rush, man," he said in his usual whimsical tone. He stared at the ceiling in a daze. Tavros, meanwhile, spun his chair around and looked up at her with concern.
"Oh, uh, sorry, Rose! Are you, uh, okay?" It was at that point that she realized she was sitting on the stairs rather than standing on them. She pulled herself up and dusted herself off quickly.
"I'm no worse for wear, I suppose," she said, sounding slightly annoyed. "But you should warn someone before you start rocketing down staircases." Tavros looked surprised.
"You're... you're not going to tell us to, uh, stop?" He asked. At that, Rose gave him a ghost of a smile.
"Doesn't seem to hurting anyone. Just watch where you're going." With that, she turned and continued to walk up the stairs again. She couldn't rightly tell them to stop, anyway. Gods knew she had done some incredibly dangerous things in her life, though none of them had involved stairs.
At the top of the staircase, she caught sight of a familiar face leaning against a nearby pillar. Though his sunglasses obscured his eyes, Rose was quite sure that Dave saw her.
"I should have known you'd be involved in anything with stairs," she said aloud, giving him a grin. He just shrugged.
"I might have suggested it, but they went along with it," he replied. "So, off to the library?"
"Yeah," she said. "If I don't meet any more interruptions."
"I won't keep ya, then," Dave said. He gave her a slight nod, and she nodded back. That was all that needed to be said.
Maybe they really did act like brother and sister.
Rose continued down the hall unimpeded until she reached the door of the library itself. With a sigh of relief, she opened the door, feeling as though she was home free. Oddly, though, the large wooden door seemed much lighter than usual when she pulled it open. Almost as though someone on the other side was pushing it—
She came face to face with Eridan.
"Oh, hey Roz," he said, looking a little surprised as he walked out of the library but otherwise not particularly affected. Rose scowled.
"Hello," she replied, though the venom in her voice was obvious. Eridan sighed.
"Look, Roz, I know we started out on the wrong foot—"
"I believe that is an understatement," Rose cut in.
"Alright, alright, I came on strong when there were obviously no shared feelin's," Eridan said, putting up his hands defensively. "And I know hatin' just ain't the same for trolls and humans. I get that. That's why I haven't said anythin' since. I'm over that, and honestly, I'd like to start out on a new fin." Rose stared at him for a long moment, trying to decide if he actually meant it, or if this was some other way of pulling her into a relationship. As far as she could tell, though, he seemed to be serious.
"Okay," she said finally, and against her better judgment, perhaps, but that pleading look he was giving her was getting to her. "Fine. I'll give you another chance. Though for now, you're nothing more than an acquaintance." He nodded emphatically, as though that was more than he ever could have expected. And maybe it was. Did she really seem like that much of a bitch?
... Maybe she didn't want to hear the answer to that question.
"Anyway, what were you doing in the library?" She asked, attempting to change the subject. At that, Eridan made a face.
"Avoidin' Malfoy," he said, just barely containing a snarl. "That human gets under my fuckin' gills and makes me wanna strangle him. He picks fuckin' fights every chance he gets. I swear, if I didn't know better, I'd say he was fuckin' black for me, which makes it all the more damn frustratin'." Eridan was actually restraining himself? Rose thought in surprise. Amazing.
"I've seen his type before," she said aloud. "He'll get bored of you eventually and find a new victim to torment. He's one of the less savory types of human, unfortunately."
"Thanks, Roz," Eridan said, looking genuinely grateful. "At least I know I'm doin' right by him in human terms. The other guys in Slytherin are on my side with it, too, which helps. Anyway gotta get goin'. Seeya." He headed off down the hall, and Rose let him go. Maybe, once he quit hitting on someone, he wasn't that bad of a guy. She shrugged to herself. She wouldn't let her guard down with him, but maybe he deserved a chance.
In any case, she was finally able to step into the library. Once she was through the door, she paused for a moment, allowing the familiar atmosphere and the delicious scent of old books waft over her. The library was certainly one of her favorite places in the whole castle. She only wished that she had time more often to go there and relax.
She found an empty table and sat down with her book. It was an old tome she'd found on potions theory. It held a vast amount of interesting information on the variety of ingredients and what they did. It claimed that a potion maker with an intimate knowledge of ingredients could tell what a potion did simply by knowing what was in it, and Rose was inclined to agree. It also helped that the author had a sense of humor. The text was not just dry fact after dry fact, but thoughtful observations and explanations coupled with witty and enlightening tales that pertained to the topic discussed. It was an enjoyable read.
However, just as Rose was beginning to immerse herself in the words, she felt the hair on the back of her neck stand up straight. She was being watched.
She turned in her chair, looking in every direction. She didn't see anyone immediately. In fact, she had purposely chosen an area of the library that was devoid of occupants. Then, however, she looked forward again and saw a pair of yellow eyes peering at her through an empty spot in the bookshelf in front of her.
"Oh no!" She heard a cute voice whisper quietly. "The Rosie prey has caught sight of the stealthy huntress!" Rose sighed.
"What do you want, Nepeta?" She asked. She heard the young troll giggle before scampering around the edge of the bookshelf and flopping down in a chair in front of her.
"I had a question to ask!" She said cutely, looking up at Rose with her big kitten eyes.
"It's very impurrtant!"
"Indeed, it does sound impertinent," Rose said, though she smiled. No one could really stay agitated with Nepeta for long. Well, except Karkat. Nepeta wrinkled her nose.
"You know what I meant! But, the thing is, I'm already running out of paints!" She lowered her head down onto the table, looking sad. "With all these mew furiends we've been making, I've had to update the shipping wall to the point where I've used them all up! And Equius has furbidden me from hunting in the Furbitten Furest, so I can't get more that way!" Then, she brightened. "But! Eridan told me a little bit ago that he thought he'd heard of a spell that lets you write with your wand! And that would be just purrfect!" Her expression fell again. "But we couldn't find it, and he said that you were better at looking in these human libraries, so..." She looked at Rose pleadingly. "Would you please help me find it?" Rose wanted to say no. She really, really did. But how could anyone say no to that face?
"Oh, alright," she said, closing her book and standing up. "I suppose I am the most familiar with 'human libraries', as you so accurately put it." She beckoned Nepeta with a hand. "Come. It's likely to be in the Charms section, I believe." Nepeta squealed and hurried after her, chattering her thanks all the way.
Well, at least Rose made it to the library. It didn't look like she'd do much reading, though.
I haven't written much from Rose's point of view at all, so I'm sort of experimenting with it. Constructive criticism is certainly welcome, because I really like her character and I don't want to write it badly. :[
An occasional fanfic writer and general lurker. -- Chromatica: An Ib-inspired text adventure featuring Homestuck characters
THAT IS NOT SPADES
THERE IS NO CONSENT
THAT IS LIKE SPADES RAPE
TROLLS WOULD BE DISGUSTED
Originally Posted by invalidgriffin
Where do you keep the chips, dB. Can you turn up the air conditioner? Man why is your internet so slow, it is taking forever to download all these seasons of Digimon. YES Digimon is important to the lesbians process will you stop nagging.
Originally Posted by olivia
Originally Posted by Doodled
Eridan: Hunt for fearsome beast
Very fearsome indeed.
got that bitch a wweb-cartoonist. bitches lovve wweb-cartoonists.
Fanfics
Chapter Fics
Thicker Than Blood 01234: It seemed like a pretty straightforward moraillegience. He provided her with food, she protected him from the other rainbow drinkers. Maybe if her old matesprit hadn't gotten involved, it would have stayed that way.
Wizardstuck 12345678910111213141516: The new Hogwarts students just keep getting weirder every year.
Zombiestuck KKEG (1): They thought that the Earth would be empty, ready for them to rebuild and reshape it as they saw fit. They weren't expecting that the meteors wouldn't hit everywhere, or that they might have some nasty side effects. They weren't expecting the Infected.
Don't Press Buttons (1): As usual, John does something stupid. Only this time, the result is that he becomes a troll, and Karkat becomes a human. Shenanigans ensue.
One-Shots
Blood and Noir: I'd fallen for that trap once. I wasn't going to do it again. The Road Ill Traveled: A poem about Karkat and Terezi written in the style of Robert Frost's "The Road Not Traveled". Pixie Trails: Sometimes luck doesn't even factor in. Unovastuck-Karkat vs Throh and Sawk: Apparently, a Sawk is faster than a Throh. Faster than a Braviary too. Karkat finds out the hard way. Kore Wa Troll Desu Ka?: Includes crossdressing and magical girl transformations. Karkat was not pleased. The Lawyer and the Goddess: Vriska and Terezi are having a very important chat when they get interrupted by a certain juggalo. Prompt Dunp: A group of several short fics I wrote based on prompts, including Tavros and Bro sharing tea, Slick talking with Jade about (briefly) hobbits, and Dave finding a birthday gift for Rose. Tears: Getting stabbed in the chest once sucks. Getting stabbed in the chest twice really sucks. Prey: Nepeta is a clever kitty. Yes: In a moment of weakness, Rose consults her magical cue ball. My Little Sis: An alt!kids fic about Bro raising blue!Jade. Based off of MSB's AU roleplay. Funhouse: John really, REALLY doesn't like clowns. Or music by Pink. Ice Cubes: Bro talks to Nanna before his fated battle with Jack. INDIGO and CaNdY rEd: An altblood pesterlog, featuring mutant Gamzee and indigo Karkat. Kantostuck: John wants to be the very best. Like no one ever was. Disease Called Friendship: Karkat has had a bad time with friends. The Demon: Death sometimes comes in the form you'd least expect. Hope: Even the Prince of Hope doesn't understand it. Hoststuck: Yeah, I don't really know either. Coulrophobia: HONK HONK MOTHERFUCKER Do: Killer: He stalks in the darkness, waiting. Waiting. Awaken: It's hard, being a rainbowdrinker. It's hard and no one understands. Kitten: Hearts Boxcars adopts an adorable kitten. Misery Loves Company: Terezi gives the bad news, and finds out some bad news of her own. Tend the Living: Gogdammit Hussie I hate you. Doll: It's actually a very good thing that Vriska allowed Bec to be prototyped. Don't Die On Me: Terezi discovers a new reason to hate Vriska. BL1ND Buddiie2: Sollux consults Terezi on the best method of seeing without sight. Cold: Dave decides to take a little time out to go see Jade.
ProspitDreamer - Huzzah, more What It Takes! I loved Chapter 2. In Chapter 3, Rose felt a little out of character--she wasn't coy enough, I don't think.
Raikanos - That whole thing was great, but I loved how the kids were confused at the weird dream stuff going on. "also how did you copy and paste actual spoken words" was an awesome line.
SeptimusMagistos - *snrk* Okay, that was funny. A few times, I almost suspected they were simulating Earth (like, real-Earth, not Homestuck's Earth), but I'm guessing that wasn't the intent.
Tarfus made good on his promise to himself earlier and sneered at all the passerby he could. One particularly nervous looking blueblood carrying a hefty stack of papers jumped when Tarfus made eye contact and grinned at her. Papers spilled to the floor and the blueblood squeaked and scrambled to pick them up. Tarfus let out a rasping cackle that sounded demented even to his own ears. He stopped when one of his captors jabbed him in side with the haft of a sickle. Tarfus’ vision went grey, and he gasped and focused on not passing out from the pain.
Okay. Maybe he would refrain from audibly sneering. But that didn’t mean he was cowed or anything. He was just refocusing his priorities, that was all.
He continued to refocus until he stumbled and discovered that he was being led down a wide stairway. It continued downward until Tarfus could barely see the bottom before finally leveling off. Each step was agony on his aching legs, and when they reached the base of the stairs, Tarfus shivered. It felt colder and damper down here. The halls above had at least featured skylights at regular intervals. Now the azure-and-violet halls were lit only by the muted, flickering light of the aqualamps. For the second time that evening he reassured himself that he wasn’t claustrophobic.
The hall dead-ended at a wall covered in a long bas-relief mural featuring pivotal moments in Alternian history. The pivotal moments featuring waterdwellers, at least. Tarfus thought he recognized the rise of Her Holiness the First Empress of Alternia, as she was surrounded by prostrate finned trolls. Immediately following that was the subjugation of the landdwellers by the now-united waterdwelling trolls led by Her Holiness. Following this were several scenes he didn’t recognize, including, oddly, what appeared to be a land dweller holding a scythe aloft atop a hill. Further along the wall, there was some sort of tentacled monstrosity screeching while meteors rained from the heavens.
Dividing the mural in half was a large, imposing steel door that would not have looked out of place in a military vault. The edges were studded with bolts, and its face was otherwise completely featureless. Tarfus could discern no method of opening it.
The guards and Tarfus, by extension, stopped. Standing on either side of the door was a single guardemolisher. Each of them was staring directly at Tarfus and ignoring the two trolls that held him. At least they know who the real threat here is, he thought with a rueful smile.
The guard on Tarfus’ left spoke up. “Here to deliver the prisoner.”
“You may leave,” one of the guardemolishers said without removing his gaze from Tarfus.
The two Threshecutioner guards glanced at each other, shrugged, and shoved Tarfus forward. They turned left. Tarfus stumbled forward and interposed his hands between the ground and the floor an instant before his forehead would’ve hit stone. Tarfus slowly made his way to his knees then, agonizingly, his feet. He looked up. The guardemolishers continued to stare at him, but remained rooted to the spot.
“Well?” He demanded, “C’mon, I don’t have all fucking day.”
One of the ‘demolisher’s eyes flicked to the stairwell behind Tarfus for a split second. Tarfus’ face lit up in understanding.
“Oh, of course, how idiotic of me. I’m supposed to run,” Tarfus nodded at the stairs behind him, “Screaming and then beg for my life when you catch me and beat me. Do I have that right? Let’s just skip all the pleasantries, shall we? Otherwise, I think I’ll just take a nap on the floor and wait it out.”
Tarfus gave a mental grimace as the ‘demolishers maintain their piercing gaze. It’s an old legislacerator trick, the intimidating silence. Fortunately, he’d known a legislacerator once, and she had admitted to him that most intimidating silences only work if the intimidatee is already nervous about something. Armed with this knowledge, Tarfus resolved to simply not be nervous. After all, what was the worst that could happen?
He was already facing imminent death.
Finally, one of the ‘demolishers broke eye contact and turned to face the steel door in the center of the wall. He knocked twice on the door and Tarfus smiled inwardly and congratulated himself on the small victory.
A tiny slot in the door opened to reveal a pair of eyes. The slot closed again and the door began raising itself into the ceiling. As it did so, it revealed several long teeth sunk several inches into grooves cut into the floor along its base. In addition to that, the door was at least six inches thick.
The guardemolishers didn’t move from their positions. Tarfus realized that they intended for him to walk through the door himself. He weighed his options. He could remain stubbornly in place and wait for the guardemolishers to physically drag him into the room, probably acquiring a few new injuries on the process. Or, he could follow his earlier plan and avoid further pain.
He walked through the door.
Inside was an unadorned square room, with another, identical steel door set against the far wall, again flanked by a pair of guardemolishers. Tarfus assumed that it was one of them that had looked out of the hatch in the door behind him. The door behind him shut with a rush of air, and Tarfus’ ears popped. As he stepped forward, he heard the floor beneath him clanking with each step he took. He looked down and discovered that the floor was simple grating, beneath which concrete sloped into a central drain. He looked back at the door behind him, and the door in front of him.
A completely sealed room with a drain at the bottom…some kind of airlock?
Tarfus had no time to ponder the room’s bizarre architectural engineering before the far door opened, and the guardemolishers repeated their staring performance. Tarfus gave them a halfhearted glare before starting forward, only to be stopped by a pair of crossed scythes.
“None may enter without Her Condescension’s word.”
Tarfus’ eye twitched. He was tired of being jerked around. “Either you let me in and allow me to face my impending and excruciating death myself, or I’m going to fucking fight my way in, propriety be damned!”
A voice drifted out of the open door. Tarfus’ view of its owner was blocked by a wall just inside the door that created a sort of entry hall. “Do let him in. I’ve been expecting this one for some time.”
The guardemolishers glared at him a moment longer before uncrossing their weapons and stepping away from the entrance. They continued staring at Tarfus, even as he crossed the threshold and entered the room beyond. Tarfus found himself face-to-face with the aforementioned wall and discovered that his feet had become leaden weights attached to his legs. It felt like squirming larva were wriggling in his guts and he had to focus on breathing steadily to keep calm. Despite all his bravado, he still didn’t want to die.
Man the fuck up, Depinza. You lost, and now you get to deal with it.
He sucked in a shuddering breath and stepped around the privacy wall.
“Good evening, peasant,” said the Empress.
Notes
Okay, I guess I lied. Minimal Tarfus-abuse here. But at long last, the plot gets moving and we catch up to the present. The next chapter is partially written, and I have to say, writing Tarfus-Empress interaction is already a lot of fun.
As a side note, I'm probably going to shy further away from using "low-blooded" troll vernacular except when it'd be funny. It's just not worth the extra effort writing it or reading it.
Your dad tried to accept it. He took you to the circus every time it was in town. He gave you your own set of juggling balls, which you became deadly proficient with. He even bought you all manner of slightly off-kilter harlequin posters, which you immediately plastered all around your bedroom walls.
You were an alright, albeit slightly strange, little boy.
Then you became a juggalo.
Then you discovered marijuana.
And then your dad just stopped trying.
You don't have very many friends. The closest things to that are three other guys you chat online with over Pesterchum. They know you're a thirteen-year-old stoner. They don't mind.
>John: Be pestered by friend.
tentacleTherapist began pestering easilyBored
TT: Hello, John.
TT: Are you in the mood for a game?
EB: hEcK yEaH dUdE
EB: I'm CoOl To DrIvE
TT: No, no.
TT: A video game.
TT: The kind you play on your computer.
EB: oH tHaT kInD
EB: YeAh I'm uP fOr iT
TT: Excellent.
TT: I will inform Jade and Dave that you are participating.
Man, you can't understand what that broad says most of the time.
But man, is she fine.
>John: Enter.
The Land of Mirth and Shade? Dude.
This place is one gigantic dark carnival.
You're going to love it here.
But for the sake of our readership, we shall refrain from detailing exactly why, and how.
>John: Skip forward.
>John: Ascend.
Your father sees you wake up in your new form on Skaia.
Victim of a failed parenting attempt and a perpetually depleted Prankster's Gambit, he fled here as soon as he could. He thought he escaped you, escaped having to be reminded of what you had become.
He was wrong.
"Heeeey, man. Wassup. Got anything to smoke around this joint? Heh heh."
He breaks down crying, fleeing the castle. You don't follow him, because hey. He's not your problem, is he?
>John: Skip to the end.
TG: hey dude where are you
TG: jades worried about you
EB: cant
TG: oh there you are
TG: man i was almost unironically worried for a second
EB: shut up
TG: what
EB: I SAID SHUT UP, YOU MISERABLE PIECE OF TRASH.
EB: GOOD LORD, DO YOU EVER STOP TALKING?
TG: whoa nelly there
TG: let's all calm down
TG: maybe you could take a hit or something to get you to calm down
TG: and come over here we need to have a talk about this new universe thing
EB: i cant talk to you
EB: cant take a hit
EB: not allowed
TG: alright now youre just not making sense
TG: not allowed
TG: who says
EB: HE'S SAYING I WON'T LET HIM.
EB: AND I WON'T.
TG: who is this
TG: and what are you doing
EB: this is john :(
EB: AND THIS IS JOHN >:D
EB: hes coming for you
EB: I SAID I'M FRIGGIN COMING FOR ALL OF YOU.
TG: what happened to you
TG: youre not john
EB: he is
EB: I AM!
EB: he killed my dad
EB: I KILLED THAT SAD SACK OF CRAP FATHER.
EB: AND NOW I'M GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU.
EB: man i could go for a joint
TG: john dont
TG: dont worry
TG: well fix this
TG: ill get you a joint would you like a joint
EB: I DON'T WANT THAT GARBAGE.
EB: IT MUDDLES YOUR MIND. MAKES YOU LOSE FOCUS.
EB: im in so much pain
EB: THAT'S THE WITHDRAWAL.
EB: AND IT'S HELPING ME FOCUS.
EB: on you guys
EB: ON ALL OF YOU.
EB: START PRAYING.
>Dave: React.
You have never been so scared in your entire life.
Your dad tried to accept it. He took you to the circus every time it was in town. He gave you your own set of juggling balls, which you became deadly proficient with. He even bought you all manner of slightly off-kilter harlequin posters, which you immediately plastered all around your bedroom walls.
You were an alright, albeit slightly strange, little boy.
Then you became a juggalo.
Then you discovered marijuana.
And then your dad just stopped trying.
You don't have very many friends. The closest things to that are three other guys you chat online with over Pesterchum. They know you're a thirteen-year-old stoner. They don't mind.
>John: Be pestered by friend.
tentacleTherapist began pestering easilyBored
TT: Hello, John.
TT: Are you in the mood for a game?
EB: hEcK yEaH dUdE
EB: I'm CoOl To DrIvE
TT: No, no.
TT: A video game.
TT: The kind you play on your computer.
EB: oH tHaT kInD
EB: YeAh I'm uP fOr iT
TT: Excellent.
TT: I will inform Jade and Dave that you are participating.
Man, you can't understand what that broad says most of the time.
But man, is she fine.
>John: Enter.
The Land of Mirth and Shade? Dude.
This place is one gigantic dark carnival.
You're going to love it here.
But for the sake of our readership, we shall refrain from detailing exactly why, and how.
>John: Skip forward.
>John: Ascend.
Your father sees you wake up in your new form on Skaia.
Victim of a failed parenting attempt and a perpetually depleted Prankster's Gambit, he fled here as soon as he could. He thought he escaped you, escaped having to be reminded of what you had become.
He was wrong.
"Heeeey, man. Wassup. Got anything to smoke around this joint? Heh heh."
He breaks down crying, fleeing the castle. You don't follow him, because hey. He's not your problem, is he?
>John: Skip to the end.
TG: hey dude where are you
TG: jades worried about you
EB: cant
TG: oh there you are
TG: man i was almost unironically worried for a second
EB: shut up
TG: what
EB: I SAID SHUT UP, YOU MISERABLE PIECE OF TRASH.
EB: GOOD LORD, DO YOU EVER STOP TALKING?
TG: whoa nelly there
TG: let's all calm down
TG: maybe you could take a hit or something to get you to calm down
TG: and come over here we need to have a talk about this new universe thing
EB: i cant talk to you
EB: cant take a hit
EB: not allowed
TG: alright now youre just not making sense
TG: not allowed
TG: who says
EB: HE'S SAYING I WON'T LET HIM.
EB: AND I WON'T.
TG: who is this
TG: and what are you doing
EB: this is john
EB: AND THIS IS JOHN >
EB: hes coming for you
EB: I SAID I'M FRIGGIN COMING FOR ALL OF YOU.
TG: what happened to you
TG: youre not john
EB: he is
EB: I AM!
EB: he killed my dad
EB: I KILLED THAT SAD SACK OF CRAP FATHER.
EB: AND NOW I'M GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU.
EB: man i could go for a joint
TG: john dont
TG: dont worry
TG: well fix this
TG: ill get you a joint would you like a joint
EB: I DON'T WANT THAT GARBAGE.
EB: IT MUDDLES YOUR MIND. MAKES YOU LOSE FOCUS.
EB: im in so much pain
EB: THAT'S THE WITHDRAWAL.
EB: AND IT'S HELPING ME FOCUS.
EB: on you guys
EB: ON ALL OF YOU.
EB: START PRAYING.
>Dave: React.
You have never been so scared in your entire life.
.... I miss notscary!John.....
Quotes
"It is the soldier, not the reporter, who has given us freedom of the press. It is the soldier, not the poet, who has given us freedom of speech. It is the soldier, not the campus organizer, who has given us freedom to demonstrate. It is the soldier, who salutes the flag, who serves beneath the flag, and whose coffin is draped by the flag, who allows the protester to burn the flag."
-Father Dennis Edward O'Brien/USMC
Courage is endurance for one moment more....
-Unknown Marine Second Lieutenant in Vietnam
Your dad tried to accept it. He took you to the circus every time it was in town. He gave you your own set of juggling balls, which you became deadly proficient with. He even bought you all manner of slightly off-kilter harlequin posters, which you immediately plastered all around your bedroom walls.
You were an alright, albeit slightly strange, little boy.
Then you became a juggalo.
Then you discovered marijuana.
And then your dad just stopped trying.
You don't have very many friends. The closest things to that are three other guys you chat online with over Pesterchum. They know you're a thirteen-year-old stoner. They don't mind.
>John: Be pestered by friend.
tentacleTherapist began pestering easilyBored
TT: Hello, John.
TT: Are you in the mood for a game?
EB: hEcK yEaH dUdE
EB: I'm CoOl To DrIvE
TT: No, no.
TT: A video game.
TT: The kind you play on your computer.
EB: oH tHaT kInD
EB: YeAh I'm uP fOr iT
TT: Excellent.
TT: I will inform Jade and Dave that you are participating.
Man, you can't understand what that broad says most of the time.
But man, is she fine.
>John: Enter.
The Land of Mirth and Shade? Dude.
This place is one gigantic dark carnival.
You're going to love it here.
But for the sake of our readership, we shall refrain from detailing exactly why, and how.
>John: Skip forward.
>John: Ascend.
Your father sees you wake up in your new form on Skaia.
Victim of a failed parenting attempt and a perpetually depleted Prankster's Gambit, he fled here as soon as he could. He thought he escaped you, escaped having to be reminded of what you had become.
He was wrong.
"Heeeey, man. Wassup. Got anything to smoke around this joint? Heh heh."
He breaks down crying, fleeing the castle. You don't follow him, because hey. He's not your problem, is he?
>John: Skip to the end.
TG: hey dude where are you
TG: jades worried about you
EB: cant
TG: oh there you are
TG: man i was almost unironically worried for a second
EB: shut up
TG: what
EB: I SAID SHUT UP, YOU MISERABLE PIECE OF TRASH.
EB: GOOD LORD, DO YOU EVER STOP TALKING?
TG: whoa nelly there
TG: let's all calm down
TG: maybe you could take a hit or something to get you to calm down
TG: and come over here we need to have a talk about this new universe thing
EB: i cant talk to you
EB: cant take a hit
EB: not allowed
TG: alright now youre just not making sense
TG: not allowed
TG: who says
EB: HE'S SAYING I WON'T LET HIM.
EB: AND I WON'T.
TG: who is this
TG: and what are you doing
EB: this is john
EB: AND THIS IS JOHN >
EB: hes coming for you
EB: I SAID I'M FRIGGIN COMING FOR ALL OF YOU.
TG: what happened to you
TG: youre not john
EB: he is
EB: I AM!
EB: he killed my dad
EB: I KILLED THAT SAD SACK OF CRAP FATHER.
EB: AND NOW I'M GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU.
EB: man i could go for a joint
TG: john dont
TG: dont worry
TG: well fix this
TG: ill get you a joint would you like a joint
EB: I DON'T WANT THAT GARBAGE.
EB: IT MUDDLES YOUR MIND. MAKES YOU LOSE FOCUS.
EB: im in so much pain
EB: THAT'S THE WITHDRAWAL.
EB: AND IT'S HELPING ME FOCUS.
EB: on you guys
EB: ON ALL OF YOU.
EB: START PRAYING.
>Dave: React.
You have never been so scared in your entire life.
That was amazing. That was the most amazing thing I've seen all night.
... I kind of want to write more of this now...
@twinTempo: AND THAT MADE IT EVEN BETTER.
An occasional fanfic writer and general lurker. -- Chromatica: An Ib-inspired text adventure featuring Homestuck characters
THAT IS NOT SPADES
THERE IS NO CONSENT
THAT IS LIKE SPADES RAPE
TROLLS WOULD BE DISGUSTED
Originally Posted by invalidgriffin
Where do you keep the chips, dB. Can you turn up the air conditioner? Man why is your internet so slow, it is taking forever to download all these seasons of Digimon. YES Digimon is important to the lesbians process will you stop nagging.
Originally Posted by olivia
Originally Posted by Doodled
Eridan: Hunt for fearsome beast
Very fearsome indeed.
got that bitch a wweb-cartoonist. bitches lovve wweb-cartoonists.
Fanfics
Chapter Fics
Thicker Than Blood 01234: It seemed like a pretty straightforward moraillegience. He provided her with food, she protected him from the other rainbow drinkers. Maybe if her old matesprit hadn't gotten involved, it would have stayed that way.
Wizardstuck 12345678910111213141516: The new Hogwarts students just keep getting weirder every year.
Zombiestuck KKEG (1): They thought that the Earth would be empty, ready for them to rebuild and reshape it as they saw fit. They weren't expecting that the meteors wouldn't hit everywhere, or that they might have some nasty side effects. They weren't expecting the Infected.
Don't Press Buttons (1): As usual, John does something stupid. Only this time, the result is that he becomes a troll, and Karkat becomes a human. Shenanigans ensue.
One-Shots
Blood and Noir: I'd fallen for that trap once. I wasn't going to do it again. The Road Ill Traveled: A poem about Karkat and Terezi written in the style of Robert Frost's "The Road Not Traveled". Pixie Trails: Sometimes luck doesn't even factor in. Unovastuck-Karkat vs Throh and Sawk: Apparently, a Sawk is faster than a Throh. Faster than a Braviary too. Karkat finds out the hard way. Kore Wa Troll Desu Ka?: Includes crossdressing and magical girl transformations. Karkat was not pleased. The Lawyer and the Goddess: Vriska and Terezi are having a very important chat when they get interrupted by a certain juggalo. Prompt Dunp: A group of several short fics I wrote based on prompts, including Tavros and Bro sharing tea, Slick talking with Jade about (briefly) hobbits, and Dave finding a birthday gift for Rose. Tears: Getting stabbed in the chest once sucks. Getting stabbed in the chest twice really sucks. Prey: Nepeta is a clever kitty. Yes: In a moment of weakness, Rose consults her magical cue ball. My Little Sis: An alt!kids fic about Bro raising blue!Jade. Based off of MSB's AU roleplay. Funhouse: John really, REALLY doesn't like clowns. Or music by Pink. Ice Cubes: Bro talks to Nanna before his fated battle with Jack. INDIGO and CaNdY rEd: An altblood pesterlog, featuring mutant Gamzee and indigo Karkat. Kantostuck: John wants to be the very best. Like no one ever was. Disease Called Friendship: Karkat has had a bad time with friends. The Demon: Death sometimes comes in the form you'd least expect. Hope: Even the Prince of Hope doesn't understand it. Hoststuck: Yeah, I don't really know either. Coulrophobia: HONK HONK MOTHERFUCKER Do: Killer: He stalks in the darkness, waiting. Waiting. Awaken: It's hard, being a rainbowdrinker. It's hard and no one understands. Kitten: Hearts Boxcars adopts an adorable kitten. Misery Loves Company: Terezi gives the bad news, and finds out some bad news of her own. Tend the Living: Gogdammit Hussie I hate you. Doll: It's actually a very good thing that Vriska allowed Bec to be prototyped. Don't Die On Me: Terezi discovers a new reason to hate Vriska. BL1ND Buddiie2: Sollux consults Terezi on the best method of seeing without sight. Cold: Dave decides to take a little time out to go see Jade.
You wipe your brow, hefting Fear No Anvil over your shoulder and looking at you and your friends' handiwork.
The Black King is deader than the stone he lays on. The Reckoning lasted for all of two hours. Long enough to destroy Earth, but not nearly enough to come close to Skaia.
Rose and Jade land nearby, not daring to hope that it can finally be over.
"so what"
Dave walks up beside you, Caledfwlch in hand.
"is that it do we win"
"looks like it. i didn't think we were gonna make it!"
"oh don't worry, john! we always win, remember? "
"I must concur with Jade. This game has been stressful at times, but has mostly consisted of an unbroken string of success."
"well except for your dreamself. i still feel kinda bad about that"
"I don't even care about it anymore. In fact, I dare say she's better off dead. There are a lot of interesting people in the Furthest Ring."
"O RLY? :/"
"Yes, really."
"like who besides the eyeraping tentacle monstrosities"
"Well, for starters, there are exact duplicates of all four of us..."
It was shortly afterward that your worldview would be shattered forever.
You wipe your brow, hefting Fear No Anvil over your shoulder and looking at you and your friends' handiwork.
The Black King is deader than the stone he lays on. The Reckoning lasted for all of two hours. Long enough to destroy Earth, but not nearly enough to come close to Skaia.
Rose and Jade land nearby, not daring to hope that it can finally be over.
"so what"
Dave walks up beside you, Caledfwlch in hand.
"is that it do we win"
"looks like it. i didn't think we were gonna make it!"
"oh don't worry, john! we always win, remember? "
"I must concur with Jade. This game has been stressful at times, but has mostly consisted of an unbroken string of success."
"well except for your dreamself. i still feel kinda bad about that"
"I don't even care about it anymore. In fact, I dare say she's better off dead. There are a lot of interesting people in the Furthest Ring."
"O RLY? :/"
"Yes, really."
"like who besides the eyeraping tentacle monstrosities"
"Well, for starters, there are exact duplicates of all four of us..."
It was shortly afterward that your worldview would be shattered forever.
Again.
And so it begins...nice start to the Scratch story rush we're sure to get now...
Writing:
Bulletproof: Vriska is a lot more vulnerable and remorseful than anyone would suspect, she just doesn't let anyone see that. My Best Friends: Nepeta makes a sacrifice, and reflects on her life in her final moments. I Am Not Like You: The moment when you can no longer hide from your own sins is always painful. Vriska learns this when Eriden becomes her mirror.