MSPA Fanfiction VI: Trashy Rainbow Drinker Fanfiction

[A Fan]

At least something does.

[Vasch]

Hi, fanfiction thread. This is my first post here. C:

I wrote up a little fic earlier and I wanted to share it.

Power

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You have finally done it.

You have finally done what you were destined to accomplish all of your life; Bringing fear into the hearts of friend and foe alike and becoming their master, their god, is the greatest thing you could imagine.
And now it is who you are.

It was not an easy task, accomplishing this. Your plan was well thought out, your steps taken with the utmost caution. As you pondered it in the shadows of your abode night after night, you revised the plan, fixed its holes and made it nigh-impossible to counteract. The most perfect of coup de grace; the most amazing of military-planned assaults Alternia has ever seen.

And although it looked amazing on paper, its execution on the battleground was even more breathtaking to behold.

As your troops advanced onto the grounds, they were fluid movements between shadows and bushes, trees and posts. They slowly advanced on your "rightful leader," catching him off of his guard for the one time you've ever seen. You watched from the shadows as he fell, as he tried and failed to pass on the leadership to his followers; very soon did the iron-clad fist of his reign come to a screeching halt.

Your squadron turned to you as you emerged. The fallen leader, stripped of his pride and his self-worth, could only glare at you from behind his thick-rimmed glasses. Your team had him pinned and his escape was futile; even he knew it to be so. The stare was full of helpless hatred.

You relished in it.

You reach out your hand to do the last deed, to secure your place as leader once and for all.

Tag. Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you are now It.

Enjoy! Please feel free to correct any mistakes I made.

[draconicAlgorithm]

@ Doodled: Thanks! And uh, yeah, I should probably do that. I always forget AO3. ^^;

@ Vasch: You've got me interested. :] My suggestion, though, would be to double space between paragraphs. It makes it more clear and a lot easier to read.

[wilySubversionist]

Oh man, Decker and draconic pulling out the fantastically creepy clowns! Very excellent, guys, I dedicate all my nightmares to you two. Then so much good, funny stuff too. And I hate to be the person who kills the joke (and I rarely read crossovers because I almost never get them), but I get the feeling I should know what MayorSillyBiscuits is riffing on. What is it?

[SkaianRedeemer]

@anonymousComrade: Aw, so glad to see everything wrapped up nice. Can't wait for the epilogue!

@Path: I loved PS' problem sleuthing thought process, and how it had absolutely nothing to do with anything at all in the end. Fabulous.

@ceruleanTresses: Ah, ya liar, you can do plot just fine! Also, you mentioning the Land of Rays and Glass made me picture her in a field of prisms. I think she'd have a bit too much fun with that. Annd now I have a plot bunny. Anyway, looking forward to more of this if it comes!

@wilySubversionist: We're always fans of struggling parent Bro in this forum, probably because it seems to attract the really good authors. But I have to ask about your roman numerals, I think.

@Graven: Rare that I'm going to critique this ongoing series like this but I think this would have been better stumped with the Thor scene than the pesterlog, since the latter lacks dramatic impact, but it's subjective.

@MyCurrentObsession: It's somewhat traditional to font-swap or bold input commands. I wouldn't normally lean on tradition but those quotes just aren't working, imho. Loved watching Karkat squirm during his tenure as POV.

@Decker: Oh man, that was just great.

@draconicAlgorithm: John and Gamzee's backstory sounds like probable canon, is what it sounds like. I'm glad you brought in the Warhammer of Zillyhoo for Gamzee and his wildcard modus thinger, but I think it's a bit odd that John didn't arm himself at any point. The boy is too trusting!


EDIT: @wilySubversionist, above: It's Team Fortress 2.

[Decker]

Thanks very much for the kind words everyone.

I guess that one is AO3 worthy.

[Vasch]

@ Doodled: Thanks! And uh, yeah, I should probably do that. I always forget AO3. ^^;

@ Vasch: You've got me interested. :] My suggestion, though, would be to double space between paragraphs. It makes it more clear and a lot easier to read.

Fixed; that's what I get for not proofreading it again.

[Graven_Image]

>Soldier: Recruit Spy

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daveyCrocket [DC] began trolling azureEspionage [AE]

DC: Spy! Don't flip your cheesy French lid, but I signed you up for a match in Badwater.
AE: And why would I flip my "cheezy French lid" about zat.
DC: Because you flip your cheesy French lid about everything!
AE: Well, would you look at zis.
AE: Here is my cheezy French lid. And it remains unflipped.
AE: It's just sitting zere on ze pan, turning into flambe.
AE: It's practically overcooked.
DC: Oh no. Are you into "Over-" stuff now too?
DC: Because if you are, you are fired preemptively from the team.
AE: Non.
DC: Alright, good.
AE: Zat meme is like ze offending mass in God's soiled undergarments.
DC: Haha.
DC: Making fun of religion is awesome.
AE: Zat's why everyone who uses it ends up dead, eet's embarassing.
AE: God launders in mysterious ways.
DC: I'd let you finish, Spy, but let's shut up for a second and talk about this match.
DC: I'll only be a second, really. You dont have to do too much.
AE: Excellent. I have big plans for tonight.
AE: Why are we being so secretive, if you don't mind my asking?
DC: Short answer: It's an imperative that we do not allow RED to stall us this time.
DC: Long answer: We're dead if we don't do it.
DC: Wait, that was shorter than the short answer.
DC: DAMMIT!
AE: Zat sounds like vaguely overblown poppycock, but coming from you, color me unsurprised.
DC: Screw you, Spy. This is more real than Kraft mac and cheese.
AE: Alright.
AE: So you arranged zis match?
DC: Actually no.
DC: I appropriated it.
AE: From who?
DC: Some crazy scrapped plan of the Announcer's.
DC: Hasn't she told you about it?
AE: Ach, merde, no.
AE: I cannot speak to ze Announcer. She ees insane.
AE: It still eludes me how so many patent psychopaths made it onto a single team.
DC: Probably because most people in our line of work are.
DC: Sam's beard, if you heard what I hear every night.
DC: I mean HOT DAMN.
AE: No no no. Let's not talk about your rapant untreated schizophrenia.
AE: And do not try to infect me with eet. I am off limits as ze only sane man on zis team.
DC: I've told you a billion times, it doesn't work that way, you cheese-eating surrender monkey.
AE: Why are the two of you up to all of zis?
AE: And why have I not been informed until now?
DC: Look, I'm sorry. But this is kind of a private matter between me and her. I'd rather you not pry.
AE: Good lord.
AE: Stop being so sensitive, it's repugnant.
DC: Alright, how about you take your own damn advice?
DC: You are so lucky I am such an outstanding example of an American citizen, otherwise I would never waste my time on you.
AE: What a load of merde. You know you secretly hate yourself more zan anyone else for being crazy.
DC: Nobody hates you more than you hate yerself, you moldy wine-sipping MAGGOT.
AE: Yes, well, my hatred for your particular corps of meatheaded lunks far outweighs my own self-loathing. And zat ees saying somesing.
AE: As a matter of fact, I hate you more zan I hate myself, added onto how much we both hate you. Zat is how much I hate you.
DC: Oh forget that. You know I hate the combined product of YOU and MYSELF more than you could ever begin to hate me and myself and you and yourself on your worst day.
DC: So DEAL WITH IT. NUMNUTS.
AE: Ok, time out for ze simpleton.
AE: Ze simpleton gets a time out and shuts up for a second.
AE: That would be you.
AE: Just tell me about zis match.
DC: Alright, I'll wire you the date soon.
DC: Our team will be divided into two branches.
AE: Let me guess.
AE: Offensive and defensive lines?
DC: Correct!
DC: You will be on Offense.
DC: I will be on Defense.
AE: So, I will be allowed to choose my cohorts?
DC: Well, actually...
DC: You aren't the leader.
DC: I picked the Heavy for that.
AE: WHAT?
DC: Spy, I did NOT think you'd be interested in this. Don't act all offended.
AE: Oh, so now ze truth comes out.
AE: Ingenious, choosing the only team member stupider than you to lead the branch of the team you're competing with for ze Announcer's approval.
AE: I knew zat you were a cheating, insane, amoral crackpot with no scruples or self-esteem and were basically worthless on every level.
AE: And yet I still manage to be disappointed in you.
DC: Oh, yes! I'm such an idiot for not rewardiing your get-up-and-go personality and impeccable people skills wiith a leadership position.
DC: What an inconsiderate boneheaded waste of space I've been.
AE: I happen to be a born leader, and you KNOW IT.
DC: I know your cheesy lips are flapping in the disgusting breeze that's shooting out of your fetid piehole.
DC: I do know that much.
AE: How? How do you get out of bed every morning knowing that you are ze most loathsome individual your country has ever produced?
AE: Has a woman ever looked at you with anysing but pure and utter disgust? Riddle me zat.
DC: You are such a wimp! I'm pretty much laughing until I'm crying over how immature you're acting!
DC: Like I actually give a rat's ass who the leader on offense is.
DC: You wanna be the leader? Fine! Take it up with the Heavy.
AE: I suppose these coverstations we have do get kind of embarrassing in retrospect.
AE: Are we ztill friends?
DC: HAHAHAHA! You ask me that literally every time. Are you jokiing?
DC: I can't even tell anymore.
AE: I'm joking, you meathead.
AE: Honestly, I'm just grateful no one else can read zis.
AE: As a matter of fact, why don't we just delete zis one. I'm sincerely mortified, look back at it.
DC: Yeah, alright.

[Doodled]

Hi, fanfiction thread. This is my first post here. C:

I wrote up a little fic earlier and I wanted to share it.

Power

show spoiler

hide spoiler

You have finally done it.

You have finally done what you were destined to accomplish all of your life; Bringing fear into the hearts of friend and foe alike and becoming their master, their god, is the greatest thing you could imagine.
And now it is who you are.

It was not an easy task, accomplishing this. Your plan was well thought out, your steps taken with the utmost caution. As you pondered it in the shadows of your abode night after night, you revised the plan, fixed its holes and made it nigh-impossible to counteract. The most perfect of coup de grace; the most amazing of military-planned assaults Alternia has ever seen.

And although it looked amazing on paper, its execution on the battleground was even more breathtaking to behold.

As your troops advanced onto the grounds, they were fluid movements between shadows and bushes, trees and posts. They slowly advanced on your "rightful leader," catching him off of his guard for the one time you've ever seen. You watched from the shadows as he fell, as he tried and failed to pass on the leadership to his followers; very soon did the iron-clad fist of his reign come to a screeching halt.

Your squadron turned to you as you emerged. The fallen leader, stripped of his pride and his self-worth, could only glare at you from behind his thick-rimmed glasses. Your team had him pinned and his escape was futile; even he knew it to be so. The stare was full of helpless hatred.

You relished in it.

You reach out your hand to do the last deed, to secure your place as leader once and for all.

Tag. Your name is Karkat Vantas, and you are now It.

Enjoy! Please feel free to correct any mistakes I made.

Ah, hahaha!

Love these sorts of things...

>Soldier: Recruit Spy

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daveyCrocket [DC] began trolling azureEspionage [AE]

DC: Spy! Don't flip your cheesy French lid, but I signed you up for a match in Badwater.
AE: And why would I flip my "cheezy French lid" about zat.
DC: Because you flip your cheesy French lid about everything!
AE: Well, would you look at zis.
AE: Here is my cheezy French lid. And it remains unflipped.
AE: It's just sitting zere on ze pan, turning into flambe.
AE: It's practically overcooked.
DC: Oh no. Are you into "Over-" stuff now too?
DC: Because if you are, you are fired preemptively from the team.
AE: Non.
DC: Alright, good.
AE: Zat meme is like ze offending mass in God's soiled undergarments.
DC: Haha.
DC: Making fun of religion is awesome.
AE: Zat's why everyone who uses it ends up dead, eet's embarassing.
AE: God launders in mysterious ways.
DC: I'd let you finish, Spy, but let's shut up for a second and talk about this match.
DC: I'll only be a second, really. You dont have to do too much.
AE: Excellent. I have big plans for tonight.
AE: Why are we being so secretive, if you don't mind my asking?
DC: Short answer: It's an imperative that we do not allow RED to stall us this time.
DC: Long answer: We're dead if we don't do it.
DC: Wait, that was shorter than the short answer.
DC: DAMMIT!
AE: Zat sounds like vaguely overblown poppycock, but coming from you, color me unsurprised.
DC: Screw you, Spy. This is more real than Kraft mac and cheese.
AE: Alright.
AE: So you arranged zis match?
DC: Actually no.
DC: I appropriated it.
AE: From who?
DC: Some crazy scrapped plan of the Announcer's.
DC: Hasn't she told you about it?
AE: Ach, merde, no.
AE: I cannot speak to ze Announcer. She ees insane.
AE: It still eludes me how so many patent psychopaths made it onto a single team.
DC: Probably because most people in our line of work are.
DC: Sam's beard, if you heard what I hear every night.
DC: I mean HOT DAMN.
AE: No no no. Let's not talk about your rapant untreated schizophrenia.
AE: And do not try to infect me with eet. I am off limits as ze only sane man on zis team.
DC: I've told you a billion times, it doesn't work that way, you cheese-eating surrender monkey.
AE: Why are the two of you up to all of zis?
AE: And why have I not been informed until now?
DC: Look, I'm sorry. But this is kind of a private matter between me and her. I'd rather you not pry.
AE: Good lord.
AE: Stop being so sensitive, it's repugnant.
DC: Alright, how about you take your own damn advice?
DC: You are so lucky I am such an outstanding example of an American citizen, otherwise I would never waste my time on you.
AE: What a load of merde. You know you secretly hate yourself more zan anyone else for being crazy.
DC: Nobody hates you more than you hate yerself, you moldy wine-sipping MAGGOT.
AE: Yes, well, my hatred for your particular corps of meatheaded lunks far outweighs my own self-loathing. And zat ees saying somesing.
AE: As a matter of fact, I hate you more zan I hate myself, added onto how much we both hate you. Zat is how much I hate you.
DC: Oh forget that. You know I hate the combined product of YOU and MYSELF more than you could ever begin to hate me and myself and you and yourself on your worst day.
DC: So DEAL WITH IT. NUMNUTS.
AE: Ok, time out for ze simpleton.
AE: Ze simpleton gets a time out and shuts up for a second.
AE: That would be you.
AE: Just tell me about zis match.
DC: Alright, I'll wire you the date soon.
DC: Our team will be divided into two branches.
AE: Let me guess.
AE: Offensive and defensive lines?
DC: Correct!
DC: You will be on Offense.
DC: I will be on Defense.
AE: So, I will be allowed to choose my cohorts?
DC: Well, actually...
DC: You aren't the leader.
DC: I picked the Heavy for that.
AE: WHAT?
DC: Spy, I did NOT think you'd be interested in this. Don't act all offended.
AE: Oh, so now ze truth comes out.
AE: Ingenious, choosing the only team member stupider than you to lead the branch of the team you're competing with for ze Announcer's approval.
AE: I knew zat you were a cheating, insane, amoral crackpot with no scruples or self-esteem and were basically worthless on every level.
AE: And yet I still manage to be disappointed in you.
DC: Oh, yes! I'm such an idiot for not rewardiing your get-up-and-go personality and impeccable people skills wiith a leadership position.
DC: What an inconsiderate boneheaded waste of space I've been.
AE: I happen to be a born leader, and you KNOW IT.
DC: I know your cheesy lips are flapping in the disgusting breeze that's shooting out of your fetid piehole.
DC: I do know that much.
AE: How? How do you get out of bed every morning knowing that you are ze most loathsome individual your country has ever produced?
AE: Has a woman ever looked at you with anysing but pure and utter disgust? Riddle me zat.
DC: You are such a wimp! I'm pretty much laughing until I'm crying over how immature you're acting!
DC: Like I actually give a rat's ass who the leader on offense is.
DC: You wanna be the leader? Fine! Take it up with the Heavy.
AE: I suppose these coverstations we have do get kind of embarrassing in retrospect.
AE: Are we ztill friends?
DC: HAHAHAHA! You ask me that literally every time. Are you jokiing?
DC: I can't even tell anymore.
AE: I'm joking, you meathead.
AE: Honestly, I'm just grateful no one else can read zis.
AE: As a matter of fact, why don't we just delete zis one. I'm sincerely mortified, look back at it.
DC: Yeah, alright.

...

O_O

And this.

[draconicAlgorithm]

@wilySubversionist: Thank you! Nightmares are delicious. :]

@SkaianRedeemer: Yeah, it's my head canon. I'd really like to get some canon John and sober!Gamzee convos. It just makes sense to me. And I wouldn't say trusting so much as scared shitless. Also, it was dark, and he was generally trying to stay away from Gamzee, not fight him. But thanks. :3

[ceruleanTresses]

@ceruleanTresses: Ah, ya liar, you can do plot just fine! Also, you mentioning the Land of Rays and Glass made me picture her in a field of prisms. I think she'd have a bit too much fun with that. Annd now I have a plot bunny. Anyway, looking forward to more of this if it comes!

Aww, thanks. I'm glad you liked it. I was starting to think it really sucked, but I definitely respect your opinion when it comes to writing, so I guess it was not a festering pile of dung after all. And yeah, the prism thing is exactly why the Rogue loves that planet. I almost gave her that one, but it didn't seem to fit with the whole contradiction thing she has going. I'm glad you could see what I was getting at with it, with prisms and all, cause I wasn't sure it would come across.

Also, you may be pleased to know that one of my friends is currently writing a fanfiction of this fanfiction of mine, which I guess is another way to do metafiction. So there should be more of it even if I fail to think of any new stories myself.

(Though I guess the Rogue in LORAG would be a pretty cute story in itself!))

[wilySubversionist]

@SkaianRedeemer Thanks for the compliment and help. The numerals: The whole macrostory/project? idea came from this amazing song I've had in my head for weeks now that felt really evocative of Homestuck, as well as one of the best things I've ever heard. It's where I'm pulling ideas from (some more or less literally, to my mild embarrassment), and I counted out the lyrics' couplets to kind of let the reader who cared match up the less literal ones to/keep them straight in my own head. I was gonna keep that under my hat until I finished some more, cause it kind of makes me feel like a hack to piggyback on others' talent (hence my personal fanfic hiatus), but the song is just so good that I'm willing to expose everyone to it immediately, like a sneezer on the subway. And you asked nicely. WilySubSeeeecretsssss!

[ceruleanTresses]

@wilySubversionist: Wow, that IS a really pretty song. Also, I mentioned it already, but it bears repeating that that Brofic was freaking awesome.

[SkaianRedeemer]

@draconicAlgorthim: That makes sense too, then, all right!

@ceruleanTresses: Yeah, I definitely got the contradiction thing. Sburb is so very fond of externalizing, which makes it all the more interesting. And having done fic-of-fic myself I look forward to your friend's!

@wilSubversionist: It sounds like a good plan to me! Hope it serves you well!

[wilySubversionist]

@wilySubversionist: Wow, that IS a really pretty song. Also, I mentioned it already, but it bears repeating that that Brofic was freaking awesome.

Aww, thanks, means a lot to me. And yeah, great band, best song? Definitely possibly.

ETA: @SkaianRedeemer Thanks! I guess the proof will be in the pudding.

[ceruleanTresses]

Incidentally, Skaian, I would be totally cool with it if you ever felt like writing about the Rogue in LORAG, since it was sorta your idea. Which is not to suggest that I think that my characters are interesting enough that you'd want to, and I would be hugely embarrassed if you thought I was presuming that, but I am extending permission anyway because hey why not.

[Mirdan]

@ cerulean: I'm reading through your introductions now. Knight of Void almost made me cry.

[Shadow of the Lotus]

Just gonna advertise a bit on something which purveyors of this thread might be interested in but not know about.

There is actually a directory thread for all the fan-fiction that has been written! It started from Thread 1 and goes all the way through Thread 5 (although there is no directory for Thread 4 at the moment). It was put together with the hard work of all the various folks around this forum. With the directory, you can look up every story from previous threads and read even more fan-fiction than you might be able to if you weren't aware of the directory's existence. If someone ever wanted to do the work needed to type up the directory for thread 4, that'd be swell. It's a community effort that's built largely on volunteered time. Also, even better, you can post in that thread asking for recommendations on fics to read!

MSPA Fan Fiction Directory

[ceruleanTresses]

Hmm, spring break's this week. I might have time to help out with the thread 4 directory.

Also, aaah thank you Mirdan. I'm glad it was properly sad and not just Narm.

[penguinbound]

Soldier of Fire

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Your group sits around a fire, keeping warm, but to themselves. You stay on the outer edges of the warm light the flames give, and you think. You think about how everyone's changed, because of this game. This damn game, that you hate so much, because nobody talks anymore. When Godtier was obtained by the first of the group, all conversation, both mouth to mouth and Pesterchum, ceased completely. And none of you really cared. So, when you finally got all together for the first time, you all gave smiles, nodded.

But, there's a part of you, that you've buried away because thinking about it would make you sad, that wants to talk with them again. You want to laugh with your best friend, you want to kiss your love again, you want to help your friend with her crosswords. You want everything to be normal again. And it won't.

You glance back at the fire. It's flickering holds your attention, and then you stand up. Without a word, you move between your best friend and your girl, and you sit down, you place an arm on both of their shoulders, and you start singing a song you heard when you went camping once. It's kind of stupid, but soon everyone's joining in with you, their voices soft from being unused. The fire seems to sway with your group, and you smile, and they smile, and it's like everything's the same again.

But it isn't.

You should be used to change, being the Soldier of Fire. A pawn in the battle, a faceless name strutting off into war and hoping to come back out alive. But you're also the leader. And you need to keep everyone together, because you love them. Everyone in your group is your family now. So you sing, and you laugh, and you talk again, and you can feel her touch on your skin, and you feel warm.

The warmth of friendship, love and fire.

And then, you think, when the hell did i get so corny?

Prince of Famine

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You can't stop the hunger. You don't let your face show it, because showing weakness is wrong. But you feel pain, and it gets worse everyday. But you can't eat. You tried to once, when the hunger got almost unbearable, and you threw that up almost a minute later, maybe not even. So you deal with it. Becoming Godtier made it worse. And the power you got is the worst thing you could imagine.

Why would the game give you the power to cause decay, when you want to thrive? How come you have to deal with the torture of hunger, when everyone else has no problems? So when the time comes for everyone to gather, you think of telling them, but you remain silent. You're too afraid, like you always were.

But, then, you start singing with everyone else. There's laughter at some point. The Soldier makes the flames dance, form into shapes, crawl along his arms and legs. And, for a while, you forget about the pain. You forget about your troubles. And, you think about the good things.

And, hey, at least you aren't overweight anymore.

Heir of Numbers

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Everything has some form of number connected with it. 417 is your group, the number is everywhere. You see numbers all the time. You know the net total of dead imps in your session, you know when they were killed, the time they were killed, how long it took for them to die. Because, they all involve numbers. And you can't stop. It's hard to focus when everytime you look at something, a number pops into your head and the reason it's related to that thing.

It should be helpful. But it isn't. Your head hurts. You just want to end it, the hurt. But, now it's how you sleep. You close your eyes and it seems like numbers pop into your head at the speed of light, and you hear everything to do with that number. The gathering begins, and the singing starts, and the flames dance, and you all are together again, and you can't hear the numbers.

It drives you crazy. It makes you happy.

You smile, but inside you want to cry, scream. You want the numbers back, and you don't. And then the Prince smiles at you, like he used to, and you feel calm, and you smile back at him. You realize how thin he's gotten, and you realize how different everyone looks.

You wonder if you look different.

And, for a moment, like before the game, you feel like a normal person.

Witch of Silence

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You hold his hand, and he holds yours, and you're together again. You missed his smile. You're sitting on the ground, and he's sitting on a small log, so you rest your head against the side of his leg. Your eyes drift around to the others. You realize, that without a doubt, you haven't changed.

Except for, you haven't spoken. And, really, you can't. Because that was the power the game gave you, silence, and it started when you achieved Godtier. You don't sing along with everyone else, but you pretend to. Because you don't want the Soldier to know. Not yet. And then you think about all the things you won't get to say, to anyone. And you feel your eyes get wet. And you make sure no one sees your face.

You wipe away a tear, and wrap an arm around the Soldier's leg, and smile. And soon, you're all resting. The Prince is taking watch, and you and the Soldier lay together, and he speaks, and you listen. He says he loves you, and there's silence. You open your mouth to respond, and you remember you can't.

So you make the silence respond for you.

I love you too.

[FieryBlacksmith]

Comment Dunp:

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Heeeeeeeere's Blacksmith! Part 1 quoted, part 2 below:

Because doomed timelines are pretty fun to write in.

Swipes of red and teal, part 1

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Three knocks. Karkat looked around as the door to his room opened. "H3Y K4RKL3S."

He got up. "TEREZI? WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?"

"OH, YOU KNOW, JUST DROPP1ING BY." She slipped into his room, a cane swung on one shoulder. "WH4CH4 DO1NG, 4NYW4Y?"

"I WAS JUST GOING TO WATCH A MOVIE, NOTHING SPECIAL."

A silence fell.

"W3LL?"

"WHAT WELL?"

"4R3N'T YOU GO1NG TO 1NV1T3 M3 TO JO1N YOU?"

Karkat looked away uncomfortably. "WELL, I WOULD, BUT, YOU KNOW..." he waved a hand in front of her face.

Terezi grabbed him by the wrist. "1 C4N S33 MOR3 TH4N YOU TH1NK, 4ND SM3LL 3V3N MOR3." she sniffed. "SP34K1NG OF..." pushing him aside, she jumped onto the couch and grabbed the bowl of Troll M&M's Karkat always snacked on during movies.

"YOU KNOW 1 L1K3 TH3S3, 4S 1F YOU WOULD 1NV1T3 M3 OVER 4NYW4Y." she grinned at him while he sat down next to her.

"YEAH? WELL I LIKE THEM TOO. DON'T THINK THEY MEAN ANYTHING."

"WH4T3V3R GROUCHK4T, JUST ST4RT TH3 MOV13 ALR34DY."

--

The movie ended about two hours later. During that time, the two trolls had emptied the bowl of chocolates, during which their hands grabbed each other about a dozen times. Karkat always glanced at Terezi when they did, but she didn't seem to notice, care or mind. During the obligatory they-break-up-because-s(he)-did-something-wrong part of the movie, Terezi had crept closer to Karkat, wrapping her arms around one of his. During the part where the wronged party is asked for forgiveness (or to not murder the party that wronged it, Troll movies are a bit more complicated on this matter), she had laid her head in his lap. Karkat stared at the screen as hard as he could, not wanting Terezi to see his head turn red from a blush.

When the movie ended in the traditional, and-they-filled-pails-happily/angrily-ever-after fashion, Terezi yawned and stretched her arms. "1 R34LLY DON'T G3T WH4T YOU S33 1N TH3S3 MOV13S."

Karkat looked down at Terezi, who smiled her characteristic wide smile. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"

"W3LL... FOR ST4RT3RS, TH3Y 4R3 V3RY UNL1K3LY." she sat up and turned around, sitting on her knees next to Karkat. "1 M34N, WH4T'S TH3 L1K3L1N3SS OF TH4T M4NY TROLLS F1ND1NG LOV3 1N SOM3ON3 OF TH31R OWN WR1GGL1NG B4TCH, WHO TH3Y H4V3 KNOWN TH31R WHOL3 L1V3S? YOU S33 TH4T PLOT 3V3RYWH3R3."

"SO? THERE ARE PLENTY MORE PLOTS THAN THAT." Karkat turned to face Terezi.

"TH4T'S NOT MY PO1NT. YOU H4V3 4LL SORTS OF STOR13S ABOUT TH3 MOST UNL1K3LY OF ROM4NC3S, 1NCLUD1NG H1GH 4ND LOWBLOODS 4LL OV3R TH3 PL4C3. 4LL V3RY UNL1K3LY."

"IT'S ALWAYS UNLIKELY. NAME ANY QUADRANT, AND TELL ME HOW IT WAS FILLED IN A WAY THAT WASN'T WAY UNLIKELY TO HAPPEN. THAT'S HOW QUADRANTS WORK." Karkat told her.

"TH3 TH1NG 1S, 1T 4LW4YS ST4RTS 1N TH3 S4M3 W4Y. G1RL M33TS GUY, ST4RTS TO L1K3 OR H4T3 H1M, TR13S TO F1GUR3 OUT 1N WH1ICH QU4DR4NT H3 GO3S..." she smiled, but a smaller smile this time.

"I DON'T GET WHERE YOU'RE GOING WITH THIS..."

"3V3NTU4LLY SH3 TH1NKS H3 WOULD B3 4 P3RF3CT M4T3SP1R1T, WH3R3 TH3 H4RD P4RT B3G1NS: F1ND1NG OUT 1F H3 L1K3S H3R TOO."

"I... AH, YOU MEAN..." Karkat began to form a pretty good idea what she was talking about.

"H3 DO3SN'T 1MM3D14T3LY R3J3CT H3R, SO SH3 TH1NKS SH3 H4S 4 PR3TTY GOOD SHOT 4T H1M." she began to run a finger over the back of his hand that was resting on the back of the couch. He stopped her by grabbing her hand and holding it gently.

"TH3N TH3Y 4R3 TOG3TH3R FOR 4 MOM3NT, 4ND W1THOUT F34R FOR JUDG3M3NT BY OTH3RS, TH3Y SHOW 34CHOTH3R WH4T TH3Y 4R3 R34LLY L1K3."

Karkat pulled up his legs and sat down in front of Terezi, just as she sat in front of him. "TH3 L1TTL3 TH1NGS TH3Y L1K3, TH3T M4K3S TH3M H4PPY, TH4T TURNS TH3M 1NTO W4X 1N TH31R M4T3'S H4NDS..."

With his free hand, Karkat carefully removed Terezi's glasses and put them in the now-empty bowl behind him. "HER SOFT VOICE, HER SENSE OF HUMOR, HER INTELLIGENCE..." he ran a hand over her cheek, and got closer in a way that put her knees in between his. "HER SOFT SKIN, CUTE SHARP HORNS, GREAT FIGURE, BEAUTIFUL EYES..."

"3H... 1 W4SN'T R34LLY T4LK1NG 4BOUT 4NYON3 1N P4RT1CULAR, K4RCUT3-" she stopped at her mispronounciation.

"BUT I AM." before she could respond, Karkat put a hand behind her head and kissed her. Terezi tried to struggle with a muffled "413", until she realised something.

Karkat Vantas tastes DELICIOUS.

She wasn't sure what the finishing ingredient was; the raw emotion, the chocolate still on his lips, or the decadent red strawberry-cherry fruit blast that was his blood running just below his lips. Whatever it was, she loved it. Wrapping her hands around his neck and pushing him onto his back, Karkat had his arms free to hug Terezi as tightly as he could. They laid there together for a length time that they would only be able to describe with three words:

Way too short.

Atuhor's Nose:

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Part 2 wil describe the doomed timeline part. Originally intended as one big story, it grew out of hand during the writing process. Oh well.

Troll M&M's are painted with food dye made from dead grubs. Kinda gross when you think about it.

Swipes of Red and Teal, part 2

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They just laid on the couch. Terezi had her arms around Karkat's waist, her head carefully against his chest not to hurt him with her horns. He had an arm around her head, and ran his free hand through her hair.

"MMM... W3 SHOULD H4V3 DON3 TH1S W4Y 34RL13R." Terezi sighed. She pushed her head out of Karkat's hold, so that it was on the same height as his.

"YEAH." he gave her a soft kiss. "WE SHOULD DO THIS AGAIN REAL SOON."

"1 GOT 4 B3TT3R 1D34..." she rolled him on his side, crawled on top of him, and playfully grabbed his nubby horns. "WHY NOT 4 ROUND 2?"

He put his arms around her waist. "SOUNDS GOOD, BUT, EH... DO YOU THINK WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT BEFORE THE SUN COMES UP?"

"W3LL, K4RK1SS3S, 1 TH1NK W3'R3 TOO L4T3 FOR TH4T." Terezi sat up, and looked out of the window. "1T'S R1S1NG 4LR34DY, 1 C4N F33L 1T."

"AW SHIT. WHAT NOW?" she smiled a big smile at Karkat as she climbed off him.

"S1MPL3, K4RCUT13. YOU'R3 GO1NG TO 1NV1T3 M3 TO ST4Y 4T YOUR PL4C3 FOR TH3 D4Y." she walked up to the window and blinded it. "W3LL?"

"TEREZI, IT'S FAR TOO DANGEROUS TO LET YOU GO HOME RIGHT NOW. I WANT YOU TO STAY WITH ME FOR THE DAY."

"4W K4RKL3S, 1 THOUGHT YOU'D N3V3R 4SK." she walked back, and sat down on top of him. Their hands found each other, and their fingers entwined. Karkat said nothing as he just looked at Terezi.

"YOU L1K3 WH4T YOU S33?" she asked with a grin.

"I SEE MY BEAUTIFUL MATESPIRIT SITTING ON TOP OF ME, SO YES, I LIKE WHAT I SEE." he sat up and kissed her, letting go of her hands to grab her tightly.

"4W, W4Y TO M4K3 1T SOUND OFF1C14L, CUT3K4T." she used her freed hands to grab onto him and hug him as well. What seemed to be going on forever was interrupted by a loud crash downstairs. Both trolls broke their kiss when they heard it.

"AW CRAP, CRABDAD IS ACTING UP AGAIN." wrestling himself free from Terezi's grip, Karkat got up and grabbed a sickle from his desk.

"DON'T ST4Y 4W4Y TOO LONG, W3 ST1LL H4V3 SOM3TH1NG TO F1N1SH." she told him, as she looked over the edge of the couch.

"FINISH?" Karkat walked up to her, and gently took her chin in his hand. "THAT WAS JUST A TASTE OF ROUND TWO." he gave her a kiss, and winked at her as he turned around and left his room. "DON'T GO ANYWHYERE, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK."

Terezi swooned just loud enough for him to hear it. A few moments passed as everything was quiet, then sounds of fighting began to come from downstairs. Then, a horrible scream.

"TEREZI!"

Confused, she looked for her glasses and cane, as she walked to the door. "K4RK4T?"

"RUN!"

Leaving the room and looking down the stairway, she smelled a sharp cherry cloud coming from downstairs. An injured Karkat was at the bottom of the stairs.

"GAMZEE HAS SNAPPED! RUN!" he yelled at her, turning around just in time to parry a club swung at him.

Standing transfixed for a moment, Terezi turned around and started to look for stairs.

--

The hatch opened, and Terezi stumbled onto the roof. She looked around for a way down, but didn't find anything. The hatch was kicked open, and Gamzee stepped onto the roof.

"well well. WHAT DO WE HAVE HERE." he chuckled.

"G4MZ33? WH4T'S WRONG? WH3R3'S K4RK4T?" she asked.

"the angry motherfucker? HE'S A FINE ADDITION TO MY COLLECTION." he spinned the club in his hand. It smelled like it had been completely submerged in cherry jam.

"and so will you. NOW START BLEEDING." he ran up to her. A terrified Terezi swung her cane at him, which he caught with one hand. Holding onto it, he hit her in the chest with his club. She screamed in pain as she felt her torso strain under the blow, forcing her face-down a few feet away from her attacker. Her cane was yanked from her hands, turning into its segmented form, held together by rope. Gamzee looked at it in facination, then grinned in a way only the insane can grin.

Kneeling at Terezi, he put the rope around her neck. "little legislacertor. YOU HAVE COMMITED AN UNFORGIVABLE CRIME. your blood is the most beautiful teal. FOR WHICH THERE IS BUT ONE PUNISHMENT. death by hanging." Dragging her to the edge of the roof, he pulled the ends of the cane as far away from the edge as he could, pulling Terezi off the roof, and causing her to fall.

Snap.

--

Terezi put her hand against her neck. It was sore, but unbroken. She had fallen onto one of the side segments of the house. The rope of her cane was sturdy, but not strong enough to hang someone with. Strangle, perhaps, but not enough to maintain a troll's weight.

Terezi got to her feet, and tried to find a way to escape. After a few steps she felt something under her shoes. Broken glass. Reaching out closely, she felt nothing in a place that should have either a wall or window. Even when she climbed through as careful as she could, she could not avoid a few cuts from broken glass.

The room she had entered took her breath away. It stank of fresh fruit, mainly red-colored ones. Shaking, she walked to the source of the smell. She kneeled down and laid her hands on it. One of its nubby protrudings poked into her leg. She didn't care. She began to cry. "K... K4RK4T... PL34S3..."

Something hit her from behind. She shouted in pain and landed on her back. "isn't it beautiful? ALL THAT FUCKING RED. just look at it all over the room. JUST MOTHERFUCKING LOOK AT IT." Gamzee yanked her glasses off and threw them aside. "oh wait, i forgot. YOU CAN'T FUCKING SEE."

Terezi tried to grab him, fight him, do something. Gamzee replied by bringing down his fist on her face. She screamed in pain and grabbed her nose. He looked at the blood on his hand. "beautiful. NOW LET'S SEE HOW MUCH OF IT YOU GOT." the Subjugglator pulled her hands away, and raised his club.

bonk
BONK
bonk
BONK
bonk
BONK

--

"T... TEREZI?"

"K4RK4T?"

He didn't answer. He just hugged her as tightly as he could.

"I'M SORRY TEREZI I'M SO SORRY I SHOULD HAVE BEATEN HIM I SHOULD HAVE PROTECTED YOU BETTER I SHOULD HAVE DONE MORE I'M SORRY I'M SORRY I'M SORRY-"

"K4RK4T."

"I SHOULD HAVE KILLED HIM WAY EARLIER TO STOP THIS FROM HAPPENING I SHOULD HAVE KILLED HIM WHILE HE WAS SOBER I'M SO SO SORRY TEREZI I'M SO SORRY."

"K4RK4T!"

"I SHOULD HAVE PROTECTED YOU BETTER I SHOULD HAVE LOOKED AFTER YOUR ESCAPE FIRST I'M SO SORRY TEREZI I'M SORRY I'M SORRY."

"K4RK4T!" she slapped him across the face. "SHUT UP YOU BLUBB3R1NG P4NSY." she lowered her hand. "1'M NOT M4D 4T YOU. YOU D1D 4LL YOU COULD."

"BUT IT WASN'T ENOUGH I'M SO SO-" he was slapped across the other side of the face.

"STOP TH4T, OR 1'LL SL4P YOU 4G41N. YOU D1D 4LL YOU COULD, YOU D13D TRY1NG TO PROT3CT M3. YOU TH1NK 1 DON'T 4PPREC14T3 TH4T?" Karkat tried to say something, but decided not to when Terezi raised her hand to hit him. "YOU'R3 4 H3RO 1N MY BOOK, 4ND S4Y1NG TH4T 1T DO3SN'T COUNT B3C4US3 1 D13D 1S BULLSH1T. YOU D13D PROT3CT1NG YOUR M4T3SP1R1T. TO PROT3CT M3."

He ran a hand over her cheek. "TEREZI..."

She grabbed his hand. "PLUS, 1T'S NOT 4LL TH4T B4D. 1 C4N S33 4G41N."

Karkat looke surprised, and gently put his free arm around her. "YOU CAN?"

Terezi grinned. "Y34H, 4ND 1 L1K3 WH4T 1 S33." she put her arm around him, and they hugged.

"I LOVE YOU, TEREZI." he whispered.

"1 LOV3 YOU TOO, K4RK4T." she answered.

They kissed.

Author's notes:

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Welp, there it ends. I might do more with these guys later, in a different work. Until then, see you next time!

sorry, no chocolate here.

Okay, order of reactions:

"hehehe..."
"Awww..."
"Wait, I don't think Karkat would talk like tha-"
"Awww..."
"Wait, no... No... NOOOOOOO!"

"Phew!"
"No!
""
":/ Alright. I can deal with that."

Mission accomplished, then.

[draconicAlgorithm]

Just gonna advertise a bit on something which purveyors of this thread might be interested in but not know about.

There is actually a directory thread for all the fan-fiction that has been written! It started from Thread 1 and goes all the way through Thread 5 (although there is no directory for Thread 4 at the moment). It was put together with the hard work of all the various folks around this forum. With the directory, you can look up every story from previous threads and read even more fan-fiction than you might be able to if you weren't aware of the directory's existence. If someone ever wanted to do the work needed to type up the directory for thread 4, that'd be swell. It's a community effort that's built largely on volunteered time. Also, even better, you can post in that thread asking for recommendations on fics to read!

MSPA Fan Fiction Directory

Actually, I'd been thinking about helping out with this for a while. I'm out of school for a week, too, so now would be a good time.

[Path]

Re: RvB and TF2 crossover fics
I love you guys.

Re: Directory
What there is a thing like this? *grabs for*

[mutecebu]

Yay indystuck. Honestly, I really hadn't gotten annoyed at Tim until now. Through the past, he's seemed to at least try not to be a jerk. Close-lipped and cryptic, but he did demonstrate to the bunny that he had in the past taken the time to get to know his entire family. I'll admit that this was pretty jerky though.

Also, I want to clarify that i don't mean annoying in an unenjoyable way. Frequently, a character can be annoying in a way that hurts the story, but this isn't one of those times.

Hmm... I wonder how you can make a character annoying in a good vs bad way? I enjoy trying to find "rules" of fiction writing, so here are my thoughts on the matter:

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Ways you can have "Good annoying":
-The character is otherwise interesting, and/or is doing interesting things. If "annoying" is the only character trait, or if >50% of the traits are "annoying" ones, then it's a frustrating character. Tim is very complicated and interesting.

-The annoying traits are used as a problem or trouble to be overcome (whether in a protagonist, antagonist, or accessory character). The villain can be annoying. The annoying aunt who doesn't get much screen-time can be annoying, but usually only if that is actually serving the plot. As for a protagonist - I'd say be really careful, because even if they're going to grow out of it, I personally don't enjoy reading the annoying bits.

[billybobfred]

This is a terrible, terrible idea.

But then so are all of my ideas I suppose.

I. M. Stuck

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CURRENT immoralMagician [CIM] RIGHT NOW opened memo on board MEEN'S DUNGEON! KEEP OUT!.

CIM: oh look what clever chil;dren
CIM: see them study watch them learn
CIM: how i HATE those goody-goodies
CIM: how they make my stomach turn
CURRENT studiousSister [CSS] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CURRENT bookishBrother [CBB] RIGHT NOW responded to memo.
CSS: Who's this creep?
CBB: No idea.
CIM: ive got a litte secret
CIM: wait
CIM: how gid you brats get in this memo?!!?
CSS: Uh, it's a public board?
CBB: You created the board, didn't you?
CSS: And the memo is also public?
CBB: Did you just keep the default settings?
CIM: this is supposed to be aprivate memo just for me
CSS: And the software automatically invites your whole contact list when you create a memo unless you specify otherwise.
CBB: Did you even read the instructions?
CSS: Did you even yeah what he said.
CIM: hahahah why would i read instrustions I M not a bookworm ike you two are
CSS: Right.
CBB: Should have known.
CIM: whatever i guess i can commence my eeeevil plan right now ha
-- CURRENT immoralMagician [CIM] sent CURRENT studiousSister [CSS] and CURRENT bookishBrother [CBB] the file thisbookisnotatrapipromise.pdf --
CBB: Aha, what?
CSS: And you expect this to work?
CBB: Oh man, this plan is SO clever!
CSS: You JUST SAID that you were commencing your evil plan!
CBB: I have totally fallen for your ruse!
CSS: I'm not even downloading that file.
CBB: I bet it doesn't even work.
CSS: Ha! That would be so like him.
CIM: uh
CIM: yeah thats right i broke my evil plan that is tdefinitely the case
CIM: so why don't you just go and delete thawt file now
CIM: since it's uselessa nd lall
CBB: Oh, now I have to see it.
CIM: hahaha
CIM: i see you over there on your computer
CIM: it worked perfectly
CIM: and now
CIM: your trapped in my magic labyrinth
CIM: SUCK ON IT BOOKSWORMS

CIM closed memo.