MSPA Lyric Re-writes and Singing: Nomination Time!

**cannabisHero** · 04-29-2011, 08:58 PM

Ok so this is a WORK IN PROGRESS It is a parody of American pie called Fatherly Guy

i would love some people too help out

**Ether** · 04-30-2011, 04:07 AM

I haven't written song lyrics in about two years, and now it's five in the morning and there's a Notepad window with a fan parody for a webcomic I wasn't registered on yesterday. Hi!

"Kiss the Troll" (tentatively complete lyrics)

**Zosephine** · 04-30-2011, 09:49 AM

Oh wow, that flows really well! And gog DAAAAMN I want to try it.

**Ether** · 04-30-2011, 11:11 AM

Go for it!

Having said that, I'm realizing that all the "her" and "girl" lines in the original were probably supposed to rhyme. Here's a slightly edited version:

**yokaiy** · 04-30-2011, 01:34 PM

Aw, that song is cuuute. If I had any semblance of a sort-of-okay Nepeta voice I would try it, but I don't so I'll let Zo do it lol...

**Xerchisha** · 04-30-2011, 03:50 PM

so a friend of mind wrote a version of "Colors of the Wind" for Nepeta...
I've tried singing it myself and I don't like how it came out so~
Just...dropping it here.

Voices of Alternia (Nepeta)

**Ether** · 04-30-2011, 04:33 PM

"50 Quadrants to Discover" (tentatively complete lyrics)

And then I guess he never gave them the shipping chart and they all died out.

**ArmsAreLoud** · 04-30-2011, 09:32 PM

Alright, I had an epiphany with this idea. Mindfang sings as she manipulates the crowds into killing Redglare.

Let's Lynch the Lyncher

Source material here.

**Doodled** · 04-30-2011, 10:53 PM

Originally Posted by Ether

"50 Quadrants to Discover" (tentatively complete lyrics)

And then I guess he never gave them the shipping chart and they all died out.

What's the original?

Also,

Oh man I just got an idea to re-write Renegade, but it could fit for quite a few situations, especially Vriska's ancestor...

What to do... what to do...

**Ether** · 04-30-2011, 11:15 PM

Paul Simon's "Fifty Ways To Leave Your Lover." (Here's the original with lyrics, though I learned the song through this cover.)

It's bugging me waaaaay too much that Redglare's a female of a nonhuman species, and therefore probably doesn't count as a man at all. "Lyncher cyan" might be a fix, though of course there's different enunciation there.

**ceruleanTresses** · 05-01-2011, 03:12 PM

I know "Love Me Dead" has been rewritten before, for Vriska

Eridan, but I thought I'd try a Dualscar

/

Mindfang version.

(I'm assuming for the moment that Dualscar used appropriate punctuation and capitalization and whatnot, since he wouldn't have been using a chat client and therefore would have needed to write more formally.)

Lovve Me Dead (Completed Lyrics)

**Xerchisha** · 05-01-2011, 06:38 PM

Originally Posted by ArmsAreLoud

This is an idea that I've had for a while. It turned out... Alright. I probably could have changed it up a bit more, but eh. If anyone actually wants to sing this I would not argue in the slightest. So yeah.

Sympathy for the Spider

I want to do this but I have almost no time...Next weekend, maybe. I think my normal singing voice would be good for Vriska- manipul8ing my voice really hurts my throat depending on the level...

**ArmsAreLoud** · 05-01-2011, 06:39 PM

Someone wants to sing it?

Victoryyyyyyyy

Take your time, I look forward to hearing it.

**yokaiy** · 05-01-2011, 06:41 PM

Okay, found another song to edit like hell, and here it is : >

COMPLETED LYRICS
Redglare and Mindfang - The Confrontation (Parody of The Confrontation from Les Miserables)

M1NDF4NG, 4T L4ST
W3 SM3LL 34CHOTH3R PL41N
"M4RQU1S3, SP1NN3R3T"
YOU'LL W34R 4 D1FF3R3NT CH41N

8efore you s8y another word, Redglare
8efore you put my neck through that loop
Listen to m8!!!!!!!! Don't think that I'm through.
This trial is my l8st big st8nd
Don't you think they all want to see
In His Tyr8nny's name, won't you give me a hand
One fin8l b8ng, in the spotlight
One fin8l b8ng...

YOU MUST TH1NK M3 MAD
1V3 HUNT3D YOU ACROSS TH3 W4V3S
P1R4T3S L1K3 YOU D3S3RV3 NO W1LL
4 P1R4T3 L1K3 YOU.

You think I'm through, that I've no will
Well I've got news, just for you
You know nothing of my str8ngth
Even without all of my crew
You would sooner see me dead
Then, take caution to what I've said
The one that rolls here will not be MY head
I am w8rning you Redglare!!!!!!!!
I'm the stronger troll 8y far!
There is power in me yet
My r8ce is not yet run!!!!!!!!
I am w8rning you, Redglare!!!!!!!!
There is nothing I won't dare
Sh8me that I should kill you here
I'll do what must be done!!!!!!!!
TROLLS L1K3 M3 C4N N3V3R CH4NG3
TROLLS L1K3 YOU C4N N3V3R CH4NG3
NO, M1NDF4NG3 SP1NN3R3T
MY DUTY'S TO TH3 L4W
YOU H4V3 NO R1GHTS
COM3 TO TH1S NOOS3, CR1M1N4L SCUM
NOW TH3 WH33L HAS TURN3D 4ROUND
SP1NN3R3T 1S NOTH1NG NOW
D4R3 YOU T4LK 4BOUT YOUR STR3NGTH
4FT3R YOU F3LL TO YOUR F4T3
1 W1LL N3V3R L3T YOU GO
YOU WHO M4D3 4 WORTHY FO3
YOU KNOW NOTH1NG OF WH4TS F41R
YOU W3R3 B34T3N BY R3DGL4R3
DONT PR3T3ND YOU 4R3 NOT THROUGH
TH1S H3R3 1S TH3 3ND FOR YOU

And this I swe8r to you tonight

TH3R3S NOTH1NG FOR YOU BUT TH1S ROP3

You will not survive this fight

WH4T3V3R YOU M1GHT H4V3 PL4NN3D

You'll 8e defeated 8y your "law"

I swe8r it now, it's your downf8ll!!!!!!!!
1 SW34R 1T NOW, 1TS YOUR DOWNF4LL

Also in the process of rewriting "In the Dark of the Night" for Mindfang, in case anyone was interested in that, lawl...

**Doodled** · 05-01-2011, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by ArmsAreLoud

Alright, I had an epiphany with this idea. Mindfang sings as she manipulates the crowds into killing Redglare.

Let's Lynch the Lyncher

Source material here.

This is genius, by the way.

**creidieki** · 05-01-2011, 09:54 PM

Originally Posted by MayorSillyBiscuits

Want you to bawl - Gamzee Makara

Hint;
It goes to this;

You mentioned a few pages ago that you were looking for some editing suggestions on this, and, well, I just discovered the original song tonight, so I didn't mind listening to it twenty times and working on this

.

Want to see you crawl - Gamzee Makara

It took me a while to figure out how to get the second-to-last verse to rhyme. It ended up being a whirlwind tour of emotions (friendship/redrom?/laughter/blackrom), which I think actually works out well in this case, ending up pretty creepy. Who would have known you can rhyme "like me back" with "feeling so black"?

I'm also not sure whether the repeated "you" in my chorus lines is going to be very clear to listeners, but I think it's usually placed after a reference to the others, so that should help?

I'm particularly unhappy with the "Tavros invited me....happen to you" half-verse. It just seems a little bit irrelevant, and the word "Tavros" doesn't fit the meter as well as I'd hoped. The original has "one day they woke me up" here, and I was hoping to figure out something about the clowns waking up / Gamzee becoming sober, but I couldn't figure out anything.

I'm also not too happy with the last 2 lines of the first verse. And ideally, the word "miracle" should have appeared somewhere in the song.

Edit: Oh, and someone mentioned that they thought they were too female to sing this. Between GLaDOS's voice effects and Gamzee's weird voice, I feel like a female voice shifted down two octaves would work just as well as a male voice for this.

**Laasya Apria** · 05-01-2011, 10:20 PM

Originally Posted by creidieki

Originally Posted by MayorSillyBiscuits

Want you to bawl - Gamzee Makara

Hint;
It goes to this;

You mentioned a few pages ago that you were looking for some editing suggestions on this, and, well, I just discovered the original song tonight, so I didn't mind listening to it twenty times and working on this

.

Want to see you crawl - Gamzee Makara

It took me a while to figure out how to get the second-to-last verse to rhyme. It ended up being a whirlwind tour of emotions (friendship/redrom?/laughter/blackrom), which I think actually works out well in this case, ending up pretty creepy. Who would have known you can rhyme "like me back" with "feeling so black"?

I'm also not sure whether the repeated "you" in my chorus lines is going to be very clear to listeners, but I think it's usually placed after a reference to the others, so that should help?

I'm particularly unhappy with the "Tavros invited me....happen to you" half-verse. It just seems a little bit irrelevant, and the word "Tavros" doesn't fit the meter as well as I'd hoped. The original has "one day they woke me up" here, and I was hoping to figure out something about the clowns waking up / Gamzee becoming sober, but I couldn't figure out anything.

I'm also not too happy with the last 2 lines of the first verse. And ideally, the word "miracle" should have appeared somewhere in the song.

Edit: Oh, and someone mentioned that they thought they were too female to sing this. Between GLaDOS's voice effects and Gamzee's weird voice, I feel like a female voice shifted down two octaves would work just as well as a male voice for this.

Well, yeah, that's what I did here >w>
are you saying you thought it was good or you thought it would be a good idea and haven't heard this yet? @w@/
I realize some parts are pretty iffy, but yeah that's me with my silly girlyvoice tuned down a bit @w@/

**creidieki** · 05-01-2011, 10:59 PM

Originally Posted by Laasya Apria

are you saying you thought it was good or you thought it would be a good idea and haven't heard this yet? @w@/
I realize some parts are pretty iffy, but yeah that's me with my silly girlyvoice tuned down a bit @w@/

Well, because I'm extremely competent, I noticed your post where you were worried about being a girl, and then I listened to the cover you had posted a bunch of times, and didn't notice that they were the same person. Actually, I listened to the cover a bunch of times without noticing that you were a girl; I thought you were a guy who had just done a really good job with autotuning to sound GLaDOS-like. And then I thought, "That girl from earlier shouldn't feel worried; I bet with some audio processing, a girl could do a good job at this too."

Extremely. Competent.

**Laasya Apria** · 05-01-2011, 11:35 PM

Originally Posted by creidieki

Well, because I'm extremely competent, I noticed your post where you were worried about being a girl, and then I listened to the cover you had posted a bunch of times, and didn't notice that they were the same person. Actually, I listened to the cover a bunch of times without noticing that you were a girl; I thought you were a guy who had just done a really good job with autotuning to sound GLaDOS-like. And then I thought, "That girl from earlier shouldn't feel worried; I bet with some audio processing, a girl could do a good job at this too."
Extremely. Competent.

Ahahaha awesome xD!!
Nobody else commented on it (or if they did I missed it, because I, unlike you, am EXTREMELY DERPY, and not at all competent.) So I wasn't sure what to think of how I did @w@7;

**Doodled** · 05-02-2011, 07:30 AM

Let's all laud Xiki!

*wild applause*

**uglyduckbella** · 05-02-2011, 08:02 AM

Originally Posted by uglyduckbella

I think Terezi needed a song so I made one for her while in the shower

To the tune od the Oogie Boogie Man Song from Nightmare Before Christmas

OOGIE BOOGIE= Terezi
SANTA= Lemonsnout

I'd sing it myself, but my voice has been really sucky lately.

**yokaiy** · 05-02-2011, 11:06 AM

Agreed.

/throws an apploause Xiki-ward

**Xerchisha** · 05-02-2011, 11:14 AM

So boredom + Little Shop of Horrors for the final project in drama =...
this?!?!?

Suddenly Feferi (Feferi &Sollux) ((WiP??))

if anyone has suggestions, feel free to give them.

**Laasya Apria** · 05-02-2011, 12:12 PM

Originally Posted by Xerchisha

So boredom + Little Shop of Horrors for the final project in drama =...
this?!?!?

Suddenly Feferi (Feferi &Sollux) ((WiP??))

if anyone has suggestions, feel free to give them.

I love it, but I'd had the mindset that the roles would be switched, you know like Fef=Audrey Sollux=Seymore. but that's probably just the precedent set up by the art I saw on skaianet @w@;a

some small notes, I don't think "Tell me your grey cloud's gone away" fits in with the song melody, since it used to be 'tell me the bad times have clean washed away.' the amount of syllables is different, so I'm not sure how that's supposed to sound :3
Same with "But now t)(ey'll get better" I think it should be "But t)(ey'll be okay"
Maybe "ii'd alway2 look down on my2elf" would do better with just "ii'd look down on my2elf," to fit that rhythem, though I know at that part Audry does take some uncertain pauses for emotion, so I don't think that fix is too important ^^;

I really like it so far :3~

that's all I have to say on the matter

**ArmsAreLoud** · 05-02-2011, 01:55 PM

Originally Posted by Doodled

Originally Posted by ArmsAreLoud

Alright, I had an epiphany with this idea. Mindfang sings as she manipulates the crowds into killing Redglare.

Let's Lynch the Lyncher

Source material here.

This is genius, by the way.

I figured you would like it.

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