AdultStuck TOPIC II (The Last Update Of The Topic)

[Taveena]

I think Aradia holding the bundle and the white figure holding the head are happening at the same time, so...

I dunno, discounting Aradia's usual time shenanigans...

[The NL Penguin]

Have some extremely amateur, probably not great fanart of TM, AP and IS under the spoiler, everyone!

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[Godfrey]

Mild clarification time! Feel free to not take a peek under the spoiler if you'd rather continue to have your own damn theory until the next few updates are over.

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The white figure and Aradia are definitely not the same person. The bundle is definitely not Nepeta's head. Yes, the white figure is collecting the body parts of the dead trolls for some strange purpose. Is it nefarious? Who can say. Besides me. And I'm not telling.

Aradia, on the other hand, has wrapped up whatever came out of that ectobiology machine. Whatever it is, it's small, tiny, and apparently not a baby Doc Scratch. Despite that, it's still bothering Aradia for some reason.

Yet not enough to keep her from sitting it on her lap.

And yes, it's alive.

EDIT: Also I'm not entirely sure what about Aradia would be considered white.

[The NL Penguin]

I bring you, THE TWELVE DAYS OF JOHNMAS [Inspired by http://ib.skaia.net/post/view/28267 ]

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*music starts*

DM: ...Seriously?
DM: *sigh*
DM: On the first day of Johnmas,
DM: Emerald gave to me,
DM: One doooooomed timeliiiine.

OR: OOn the second day of Johnmas
OR: EEmerald gave to me,
OR: TTwo gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

AP: oN THE THIRD DAY OF FUCKMAS
AP: eMERALD GAVE TO ME,
AP: tHREE JOHN-- SHIT.
DM: Hah.
OR: TTwo gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

TM: =====# On the fourth day of Johnmas
TM: =====# Emerald gave to me,
TM: =====# Four sparking wires
AP: tHREE FUCK-ASSES.
OR: TTwo gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine. ...This is kind of grating on the voice. Ugh.

LE: [|] On The Fifth Day Of Johnmas
LE: [|] Emerald Gave To Me
LE: [|] FIVE PUUUUUUUBERRRRTIIIIIIEESSSS!
TM: =#: four soiled labcoats!
AP: tHREE FUCK-ASSES.
OR: TTwo gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

RV: on the six day of johnmas
RV: emerald gave to me
RV: six minds-a-melding!! OuO
LE: [|] FIVE PUUUUUUUBERRRRTIIIIIEESSSS!
TM: ===# four shaking teslas!
AP: tHREE FUCK-ASSES.
OR: Two gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

GI: on the seventh day of johnmas
GI: emerald gave to me
GI: seven KOBs a-beating
RV: six mind-a-melding!!
LE: [|] FIVE PUUUUUUUBERRRRTIIIIIEESSS!
TM: =====# Four wires sparking!
AP: tHREE ASS-FUCKS
OR: TTwo gglub gglubs! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiines.

FA: On the eighth day of Johnmas
FA: Emerald gave to me,
FA: Eight ... *facepaw* ORs a-glomping. *tacklehugged!*
GI: seven KOBs a-beating
RV: six minds-a-melding!!
LE: [|] FIVE SHOOOooooosh Paaaaaps.
TM: =# Four ORs blocking. :/
AP: tHREE FUCK-ASSES.
OR: TTwo Kitty-Kitties! :>
TM: =# that doesn't even make sense...
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

IS: on the ninth day of johnmas
IS: emerald gave to me
IS: nine cals dancing
FA: Eight ORs a-glomping
GI: seven KOBs a-beating
RV: six minds-a-melding!!
LE: [|] Five Shoooosh Paaaaaps.
TM: =# Four ORs blocking.
AP: fOUR OR-- fUCK!
OR: TTwo Kitty-Kitties!
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

DT: on the tenth dayy of johnmas
DT: emerald gave to me
DT: ten gods a-bominating
IS: nine cals dancing
FA: Eight ORs a-glomping
GI: seven KOBs a-beating
RV: six minds-a-melding!!
LE: [|] Five Shoosh Paps.
TM: =====# Four ORs bloacking!
AP: tHREE FUCK ASSES.
OR: TTwo Kitty-Kitties! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

RG: [X] On the eleventh day of Johnmas
RG: [X] Emerald gave to me
RG: [X] Eleven "noodles" *BOOM*ing!
DT: ten gods a-bominating
IS: nine cals dancing
FA: Eight ORs a-glomping
GI: seven KOBs a-beating
RV: six minds-a-melding!!
LE: [|] Five Shoosh Paps.
TM: =====# Five ORs blocking!
AP: tHREE FUCK-ASSES
OR: TTwo Kitty-Kitties! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine. [We're almost done, phew]

RD: On the sixteeeeeeeeeeeeeeenth day of Johnmas [Everyone else: What?]
RD: Emerald gave to me
RD: Sixteen DRs wwwwwwwwailing! ::::::::D
DR: EIGHT PLEASE A-HELPME!
DT: ....
IS: ...
FA: ...
GI: ...
RV: ...
LE: [|] ...
TM: =# ...four labcoats soiled!
AP: ...tHREE FUCK-ASSES?
OR: TTwo Kitty-Kitties! :>
DM: And one doooooomed timeliiiine.

[Satyricyst]

hmm, is it part Aradia, part human, by any chance?

[meticulousDraftsman]

I'm thinking it's a baby and the baby is her

[cryptidWrangler]

Personally I think the "human baby version of a troll" theory is likely though with Eridan rather than Aradia.

[Godfrey]

>Aradia: in an attempt to make things even more confusing, describe what the thing in the bundle is not.

It is not a baby Doc Scratch. It is not a Doc Scratch Doll. It is not a Li'l Cal anything. It is not Baby Lord English, which is absurd because that would probably be Baby Doc Scratch anyway. It is not a First Guardian. You don't think it's a demon of any kind either. Probably.

It is not Nepeta's head. It is not Feferi's head. It is not Equius' head thankfully. It is not Eridan's bulge.

It's not a hybrid human/troll, nor a hybrid human/furry, nor a troll/furry, nor a...bird/anything.

You...You don't think it's a tiny you? It probably isn't anyway. The resemblence is uncanny though.

It's not a tiny DM, nor a tiny DR. It is not a tiny John, a tiny Dave, a tiny Jade, or a tiny Rose. It is not a tiny Sollux either. It is not a tiny March Eridan or a tiny Grand Highboob. It isn't a tiny bloodswap of you or any other adult. It is not a seadweller lowblood.

It is not a tiny Problem Sleuth. It is not a tiny O'Batman. It's not some sort of weird tiny human Doc Scratch from some sort of alternate universe that's a mishmash of Fallout and Homestuck.

You could pretty much go on forever.


>Aradia: Describe the thing in the bundle.


It's a grub.


>Become homoerotically attracted to Karkat.


You don't understand this command!


> Aradia: Be filled with mental images of female Karkat due to out of adventure chatter.


You still don't understand this command! Karkat does not have breasts!

Also you're a bit preoccupied.


>Aradia: Go see what Karkat is yelling about, I guess?


You know you should, but um...

Well.

You think it'd be a little bit cruel to have the first thing this kid sees of the outside world be Karkat screaming at it.

>Aradia: Take a peek at the bundle. Proceed to vomit all over it if it is what I think it is.


That'd be even WORSE.


> Aradia: Also open up the damn bundle so we can see what's inside.



Fine. You guess you can take another, um, look.

Still freaks you right out, but you'll probably have to get used to it.

You take a deep breath and carefully, slowly lift up the blanket you wrapped it in, taking a peek inside. Your heart - or nearest troll equivalent - thumps hard in anticipation.

A tiny you stares back. With a smile.

And also one red and one blue eye, like Sollux used to have. And two pairs of little ram horns.

It's a little disconcerting.

[Kisame12]

>Aradia: gently shoosh (mom) pap the grub. It is, after all, what you are best known for 0u0

[Ruki]

> Aradia: AAAAAAAA KILL IT WITH FIRE

> Aradia: Wait, no, don't do that. It's a grub. From the sounds of things, a young grub. Show it some tender LOVE and AFFECTION!

> Grub: Fire laser eyes when shown love and affection

> Aradia: Fondly regard memories of being yelled at by Karkat when ectobiologized.

> Aradia: Smile at the tiny grub. New life in the world and it's...disconcerting, yet somewhat adorable. c: How did it come to be?

[medmedina007]

>Aradia: Use INNER MOMTECH LVL 4: COOCHIE COOCHIE COO
>Grub: Utilize adorableness, be super effective.

[cryptidWrangler]

>cryptidWrangler: Go DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA W suddenly and wake up your now grumpy looking cats and now confused looking dogs.
>Aradia: Why does this grub make you so uneasy? Oh... and what blood colour is the little wiggler?
>Grub: POOP.

[The Mather1]

>Aradia: Why does this grub make you so uneasy? Oh... and what blood colour is the little wiggler?

It was stated to be a "tiny her" so I guess it's red.

>Aradia: Contact Sollux.
>Sollux: What is going on, why did you have to come down he-
>Sollux: Agree that this is the most adorable thing ever.

[Godfrey]

>Aradia: Why does this grub make you so uneasy? Oh... and what blood colour is the little wiggler?

It was stated to be a "tiny her" so I guess it's red.

>Aradia: Contact Sollux.
>Sollux: What is going on, why did you have to come down he-
>Sollux: Agree that this is the most adorable thing ever.

It has a physical resemblence to her aside from the Sollux eyes (and the fact that it has two pairs of ramlike horns). This doesn't necessarily mean the blood color is red. She was only looking at the head of the grub.

[The Mather1]

My mistake.

Anyways when Karkat finds out he should begin ogling Rose and Kanaya in a "No, not going to happen!" way.

[ArmsAreLoud]

RoseKanaya isn't an official "thing", right? I thought it was a "Yes we both are totally into each other but our raging girl boners for John and Vriska respectively make us unwilling to commit" kind of deal.

[The Mather1]

RoseKanaya isn't an official "thing", right? I thought it was a "Yes we both are totally into each other but our raging girl boners for John and Vriska respectively make us unwilling to commit" kind of deal.

Correct, but SolluxAradia isn't either, and even if Karkat doesn't know of their past flirting, they're the only two adults left apart from him and Terezi.

[cautiousCapricorn]

Aradia: Decide this grub is adorable

Wonder if deciding a grub that looks like you is cute means your vain.

[Godfrey]

A lack of does not under the present circumstances prevent a child from happening. XP

[Taveena]

The presence of AP clearly means Karkat was in love with Tavros.

[The Mather1]

A lack of does not under the present circumstances prevent a child from happening. XP

No, but the timing for this grub means it's going to have parents, which will annoy Karkat in a very entertaining fashion.
And it's going to cause some nostalgia for Aradia and Sollux, which is also entertaining.

Also I expect Karkat's natural paranoia and his familiarity with Kanaya and Rose will have him expect them to make a hybrid kid if only to annoy him.

[Godfrey]

> Aradia: It's a grub. From the sounds of things, a young grub. Show it some tender LOVE and AFFECTION!

You proceed to show the grub some TENDER LOVE AND AFFECTION. You pet it and hug it and generally show it the SORT OF LOVE AND AFFECTION that doesn't come when you've been ECTOBIOLOGIZED BY KARKAT.

> Grub: Fire laser eyes when shown love and affection

The grub proceeds to WEEEEEE-WOOOOOO with happines, alternating blue and red flashing eyes on either side. You try not to get a seizure as you hug it again.

Then it fires tiny red and blue eye lasers. A small hole is created in the wall.

...You'll fix that later. The hole, and the tendency to shoot eye lasers at random. It seems...Bad.

> Aradia: Fondly regard memories of being yelled at by Karkat when ectobiologized.

Eh, not right now. You don't think the audience can handle any more cute grub flashbacks right now.

> Aradia: Smile at the tiny grub. New life in the world and it's...disconcerting, yet somewhat adorable. c: How did it come to be?

This little girl is what popped out when you put in the OKAY D0NE code, strangely enough. You're...You're not entirely sure why doomed you had you put it in, aside from this grub being adorable. It doesn't exactly seem as important as she suggested. Certainly not world saving, unless the world must be saved through cuteness.

...You think about the whole situation for a few moments.

Then you realize doomed you probably had bucket sex with Sollux.

o_o

>Aradia: Use INNER MOMTECH LVL 4: COOCHIE COOCHIE COO

You scratch the little grubs chin. It makes little siren noises in response. D'aaaaaaaw.

>Aradia: Why does this grub make you so uneasy? Oh... and what blood colour is the little wiggler?

Well...

You feel sort of responsible for this grub. You're probably it's lusus. Mom. Lusmom. Momsus. That'd be...Okay, you guess, but you know...DM and DR.

You haven't exactly done great there, even if it wasn't your fault necessarily, so much as it was the fault of whoever murdered you that one time - fortunately in a neither heroic nor just fashion. Still, you're a little...Afraid. That it might happen again. Or that you'll fuck up some other way. :\

Also the blood color is, um...

You lift the wrapping a little more...

Yellow. Sollux yellow.

So.

You guess you should...Probably name it or something. Her. You thought about Solara, but perhaps something better will come to mind. Or maybe you'll just go with Solara!

What will you name the grub?

[The Long Man]

Baron Samedi

[The Mather1]

>Go with Solara, don't realize you got it from Sollux and Aradia mashed together.
>To avoid fucking up, perhaps you should try to find someone to help you, that's what humans usually do, right, raise them as pairs.
>Whom to choose? Ok, Dave and Jade are busy with a kid of their own, John and Vriska too, and even then you wouldn't trust Vriska enough to let either of them help, and it's probably not a good idea to try a rainbow drinker, a dark witch or a legislacerator, and it's definitively not a good idea to even ask Karkat... o_o

[Ruki]

> Go with Solara!

> Continuing off the list, it's probably not a good idea to ask Sollux either, given leaving a young grub with someone so...0kay with things may be an issue. ...Future you?