linearHomestuck

[slapdashDuckette]

1. Purpose

I know we've already got more than enough trackers in this forum, but I keep having to reread past pages to understand current ones, and even though I've referenced the wiki to make sense of some of the Weird Time Shit, it's hard to understand where events happen on the timeline. Enter linearHomestuck: an attempt to organize the entire comic (!!) in a way that makes sense of it all. As should be obvious, there are seriously so many spoilers in this thread don't even get me started.

The events of the comic are chronicled as they happen to each character. First I'm working toward having cross-references (that's what all the KKT/ARA/TAV stuff is for) inside each character event, and eventually doing an xkcd-style narrative chart. I know I've got some previous posts to thank, link me and I'll post 'em here. Here's hoping this thread helps you all! :3

2. Meta

Update Log
I, um, might be done with all the kid-session characters? Might is the biggest word in that sentence.

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Trolls, dolls/animals, most of the guardians, and the agents are all up, plus Nannasprite. I rearranged some posts because the guardians/exiles post was running out of room. so clooooose
6/24/11: Some further cleanup done, and thread-title changed! If you were entranced by the call for help and came looking for something to do, check this post! Or poke around the to-do list. If you'd like to make some buttons, I love you - if there's enough interest I'll upload my SVG file and make a short guide on button formatting. If you're a mod and want to move this to Fan Projects, I don't mind. (thanks Drill) Also, Karkat's done and formatted, though I welcome debate on his order of events.
6/17/11: Made some buttons last night, following John's travels! I guess you can tell. xD If you want to stick it in your sig (who knows?) this is the image URL. Updated the kids to reflect current events, shoved the trolls in their own post, made the character index more of an index and less of a spoiler hoard.
6/15/11: I added WV & PM about a week ago, but now AR, WQ, WK, and Dad are also up. I'm going to try to combine the Guardians/Exiles/Agents/Dolls-Pets-Consorts into one post, because they're minor enough (I'm probably going to have to take the trolls to their own post, too. :\ ) I also made a to-do list and some thank-yous.
5/30/11 pt 2: Kids are done! yusssss
5/30/11: Okay! I've finished reading almost everything but as it so happens, having seventy pages of notes and links up on OpenOffice causes it to get testy and crash. Nothing lost, though. There's just an awful lot and I'm trying to figure out how to organize all this.
5/25/11 pt 2: HAIVUBENT KONPREET
5/25/11: Added Sollux, Nepeta, Kanaya, Terezi and Vriska. Still just Hivebent.
5/24/11: First go. Exclusively the events of Act 5.1 (Hivebent) for now, because I felt it was a good place to start. Going in spectrum order, starting with just Karkat, Aradia, and Tavros because pasting in all these links is a pain. I apologize if some numbers are missing or if the blurbs aren't descriptive enough. If anyone wants to help, that would be awesome?

To-Do List (aka how you can help)

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Characters that still need a timeline

-Bec and Bec/Jadesprite
-Doc Scratch
-Troll ancestors
-Serenity - Rena's on it!
-MC Intermission characters

General stuff:

-check links to make sure they're going to the right place
-check to make sure the order of events is correct
-make buttons if you want?
-50% shoutpole reduction in the blurbs - too many damn exclamation marks

Thanks to:

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-Tay-Tay, who corrected one of Karkat's links
-Merton, who did a Li'l Cal timeline here
-renachan, who's doing a Serenity timeline

3. Character Index
Kid-Session Characters
Kids -------------------------------------|

John Egbert
+++Guardian: Dad (Parent: Nanna)
+++Sprite: Nannasprite
+++Doll: Liv Tyler, Casey
Rose Lalonde
+++Guardian: Mom (Animal: Mutie)
+++Sprite: Jaspersprite
+++Animal: Maplehoof
Dave Strider
+++Guardian: Bro
+++Sprite: Davesprite
+++Doll: Li'l Cal
Jade Harley
+++Guardian: Bec
+++Sprite: Jadesprite
+++Second Guardian: Grandpa (Animal: Halley)

Exiles -----------------------------------|

Wayward Vagabond
+++Animal: Serenity
Peregrine Mendicant
Aimless Renegade
Windswept Questant

Agents ----------------------------------|

Jack Noir (Sovereign Slayer)
Hegemonic Brute
Draconian Dignitary
Courtyard Droll

Troll-Session Characters
Trolls ------------------------------------|

Karkat Vantas
Aradia Megido
Tavros Nitram
Sollux Captor
Nepeta Leijon
Kanaya Maryam
Terezi Pyrope
Vriska Serket
Equius Zahhak
Gamzee Makara
Eridan Ampora
Feferi Peixes

Ancestors ------------------------------|

The Handmaid
The Summoner
The Ψiioniic
Sufferer Signless
The Disciple
The Dolorosa
Neophyte Redglare
Marquise Mindfang
E%ecutor/Expatri8 Darkleer
The Grand Highblood
Orphaner Dualscar
Her Imperial Condesce

Exiles ----------------------------------|

Spades Slick
Hearts Boxcars
Diamonds Droog
Clubs Deuce

The Felt --------------------------------|

Lord English
Doc Scratch
Snowman

4. Narrative Chart

The true purpose of LHS is this - the narrative chart. Basically a glorified timeline, the narrative chart unifies the blurblist of each character and their cross-references (as of now, no cross-refs, but they will come). Each character's line is represented by their color, and each character event is listed by a number inside an icon representing what they're wearing at the time, or something significant they're holding. This may seem silly, but costume changes in Homestuck are great ways to delineate character actions! For example, John's (which is pictured in the header) is shirt --> white green slime shirt --> gushers slime tux --> ectobiology suit/Prospijamas --> Vriska's outfit --> godhood.

Most events are shared with other characters. For example, John-28 (mess with Rose's stuff in LOLAR while she's asleep) is shared with Rose-31 (get Gusherbucket-pranked by John). These two events would be placed next to each other. John's Pesterchum conversation with Kanaya (her first) would have arrows pointing from John's line to Kanaya's line, and from Kanaya's line to John's line, using the icons to show the connection instead of drawing a line straight from one to the other, which eliminates some of the spiderwebby mess that tends to happen with Homestuck timelines. Visuals will come eventually.

For now, though, I have to finish posting all the other characters. But if some Illustrator/Inkscape artists want to make some buttons in the meantime, that would be more than appreciated! I can upload the .svg file I've been making them in if it helps.

5. Resources

The Mysterious Countdown
Points on the countdown: 10:25, 6:12, 5:12, 4:13, 3:14, 2:42, 1:00, 0:00:10, 0:00:10, 0:00. 4:13 and 3:14 are also on [S] Wake.

Character-color Hex Codes

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John - 0715cd
Rose - #b536da
Dave - #e00707
Jade - #4ac925

Nannasprite - #00D5F2
Jaspersprite - #F141EF
Davesprite - #F2A400
Jadesprite - #1F9400

Aradia - #a10000
Tavros - #a15000
Sollux - #a1a100
Karkat - #626262
Nepeta - #416600
Kanaya - #008141
Terezi - #008282
Vriska - #005682
Equius - #000056
Gamzee - #2b0057
Eridan - #6a006a
Feferi - #77003c

Other timeline-trackin' threads:
The Great Homestuck Timeline
Pesterlogs Temporally Arranged
The Homestuck Reference Index
Kid Tracker Last Seen Chart
Troll Tracker Last Seen Chart

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

This will be exceedingly useful in my own Timeline Project I keep forgetting to work on.

I'll place this post here as a reminder that (barring the normal technical difficulties my internet seems to go through and, possibly, my dad's last-minute needing of me to do some work for him) I need to work on it tomorrow, at least a little bit.

I'll then post a link to that topic in this thread when I'm done with probably tomorrow's update.

[slapdashDuckette]

@APW: I'm hoping it will! I might put an Other Timeline Resources link at the bottom, because you can never have enough. Is it a post?

This was all especially helpful in understanding Aradia and Sollux. They move around too much.

Edit: Also, Tavros added.

Edit2: Heading off to bed, but I'll post more tomorrow evening.

[Niklink]

This is... this is just YES.

[mythmonster2]

About Aradia's #12: Equius WAS the first to connect, wasn't he? Aradia servered him, since Equius' second gate led him to Aradia's land.

EDIT: Oh wait never mind, me being stupid and forgetting about 15. That is interesting!

[Anonymoose]

YES

YES

THIS

[UNDERWATER BASKETWEAVING]

This is fantastic. Please continue.

[Tay-Tay]

The first link to Karkat's activities should be changed to the page immediately afterwards.

[slapdashDuckette]

About Aradia's #12: Equius WAS the first to connect, wasn't he? Aradia servered him, since Equius' second gate led him to Aradia's land.

EDIT: Oh wait never mind, me being stupid and forgetting about 15. That is interesting!

Well, I'm not really sure - I've been thinking about it since I happened upon it, and it's possible that Equius was the first one to physically enter his Land. While Aradia was the first on Blue Team to have a server player, we don't see her in LOQAM until Equius finds her there. So, it could be true!

The first link to Karkat's activities should be changed to the page immediately afterwards.

Should it? It looks to me like the page after that is the one that talks about the recuperacoons.

Thanks, everyone! I've added Equius just now. I actually did Gamzee first (he was bothering me the most) and followed him all the way through to the current pages before I decided I needed to do everyone and start at Hivebent, so he'll have more stuff.

[Windwaker]

There are two of these in the Fan Projects forum plus a completed one for all the pesterlogs evar in the sig of the user named Tenebrais.

[slapdashDuckette]

There are two of these in the Fan Projects forum plus a completed one for all the pesterlogs evar in the sig of the user named Tenebrais.

I knew about Tenebrais's, that was sort of the inspiration. I'm still going to keep going, but what are the other two?

[Windwaker]

One is AProcrastinatingWriter's, the other, I forget. I just saw it kinda floating around.

You might be well off combining this thread with APW's, he had a pretty good start.

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

And assuming my internet gets back on track, in a couple of hours I'll have a good continuation. As is right now, it takes ten to thirty seconds to load every time I open a page.

I don't want to go through several minutes of nothing just to check a page and make sure I've got things in the right order.

But like I said, I'll post in this topic either way once I finally get back to do this. Could be tonight, might be tomorrow. More than likely will be before Friday. Definitely will be up by the end of the week. And I'll make sure the update is bigger depending on how long it takes.

I say like anyone cares.

[renachan]

This is all types of awesome, and reminds me of a project I kept meaning to start... gah, maybe I should work on a first post tonight >.o

More on topic, I'd love to help with this, let me see if I can get to something later tonight

[slapdashDuckette]

And assuming my internet gets back on track, in a couple of hours I'll have a good continuation. As is right now, it takes ten to thirty seconds to load every time I open a page.

I don't want to go through several minutes of nothing just to check a page and make sure I've got things in the right order.

But like I said, I'll post in this topic either way once I finally get back to do this. Could be tonight, might be tomorrow. More than likely will be before Friday. Definitely will be up by the end of the week. And I'll make sure the update is bigger depending on how long it takes.

I say like anyone cares.

I wouldn't mind combining forces like Windwaker suggested. You're certainly going through all the universal details that I'm probably not going to get to, and if this helps you, by all means use it. And I wish the best for your internet connection. O.o

This is all types of awesome, and reminds me of a project I kept meaning to start... gah, maybe I should work on a first post tonight >.o

More on topic, I'd love to help with this, let me see if I can get to something later tonight

Ooh, yay! Somehow I'll have to get organized about this, then.

[Tay-Tay]

The first link to Karkat's activities should be changed to the page immediately afterwards.

Should it? It looks to me like the page after that is the one that talks about the recuperacoons.

No, I meant the FIRST link, the one with Tavros.
It doesn't even have Karkat in it, but the page immediately afterwards does,
so I assume that's what you were shooting for.

[slapdashDuckette]

No, I meant the FIRST link, the one with Tavros.
It doesn't even have Karkat in it, but the page immediately afterwards does,
so I assume that's what you were shooting for.

Oh, duh. Fixed it, thanks!

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

Update wasn't nearly as big as I was planning, but it's done. The ancestor's information is now up-to-date. Close to an hour's work, not really anything that taxing. Will continue later.

Also I am giving more effort to explaining updates here than in the actual topic GO ME

Dang, I use that emoticon a lot.

[slapdashDuckette]

Gweheh! I'll look in a bit.

I've been rereading the comic over the last couple days and keeping track of all the characters. I'm right around Vriska's ascension, so I'm almost done: just the last five months of 5.2 to go. It has been enlightening! But it also means I've got like forty pages of blurbs and links in a word document and a bit of a headache from staring at a screen for too long.

But as soon as I'm done tracking everything, I'll add the kids!

[slapdashDuckette]

Okay, here's John! Problem is that suddenly I am out of space in the first post, so I'm trying to figure out how to reorganize this! Because John is pretty enormous.

John Egbert

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1. Ride in on a meteor holding a fresh copy of Sassacre's and destroy Nanna's family joke shop, Prankster's Gambit. The impact kills Nanna too. Dad picks you up and takes you home. Over the years, he collects newspaper clippings about the incident. Dad teaches you how to bake, how to play the piano and the art of prank. Jade introduces herself to you.
2. Gamzee chucklevoos a one-armed angry jester doll in your room on Prospit, engendering your subconscious with an unhealthy, clown-centric paranoia. You unknowingly begin scrawling clowns all over your posters.
3. All of your friends birthdays are bunched together - 12/1 (Jade), 12/3 (Dave), and 12/4 (Rose)! In a hurry you get ready to send Rose some knitting supplies, and the Ben Stiller shades for Dave. You decide send Jade pumpkin seeds and a shirt for her birthday. Before you wrap it up, Kanaya trolls you as per your future instructions and you realize Rose was punking her somehow – you tell her not to worry, Rose is better than that. Then Vriska trolls you about how she'll kill you in your future. Terezi trolls you about not a whole lot before insulting your ectobiology cred ('the hell is ecto-who-what?' you say) and then you talk to Jade about her present. You figure it's high time you changed your chumhandle.
4. At some point, start hating Betty Crocker. Why? You certainly enjoyed baking when you were younger.
   ---
5. It is your birthday! Mess around in your room for awhile, talk to Dave about the apple juice he found in his closet, and finally come upon the topic of the beta. Dave tells you to check the mail. Since you always do what your friends tell you, you check - and yes, there's mail in the box! Get excited, but then get discouraged when Dad comes home and picks it up first. Tell Dave - he's annoyed because Rose has been asking him to play SBURB all damn day. You tell him you've been screwing around with your sylladex all morning and he tells you about the strife specibus. You decide to see if you can get the mail to help out your good buddy.
6. Wander downstairs to try to retrieve the mail - burn your copy of GameBro and topple Nanna's urn by accident. Examine the massive present hanging out in the living room. You open the present - it contains a giant harlequin. Oh hell no.
7. You go upstairs because you concoct a brilliant plan involving the fake arms. While you're up there, Rose asks if you've got the beta. You don't, but you're pretty sure it's in the mail. Go check the mail; Dad's clearly already got it. Drat. It's going to be a long day.
8. You strife with Dad; he's trying to give you more cake. You accept a cake, and grab Dave's package and SBURB client envelope. You try to stick everything in one card and cause a double-decker sylladex cake mess. You clean it up, get pestered by Jade and then tell Dave you've got the beta!
9. Start installing the beta, and in the meantime read Data Structures for Assholes yourself the queue modus. Open Dave's package to receive the bunny from Con Air! Then Rose tells you she'll be your server.
10. Rose is dropping all kinds of crap in your house. At her request, get the PDA and try to figure out what all the alchemy stuff is supposed to do. Instead you get pestered by Dream Jade, who wonders if you got her package, and you go around the house checking out all the weird devices.
11. With Rose's help, you pop the kernelsprite out of the cruxtruder. Timer's at 4:13! Rose deploys your punched entry card and picking it up maims the harlequin. After making Perfectly Generic Objects, finally notice the incoming meteor with your telescope. Panic at Rose and let Dave know you might be about to die.
12. When Rose gets back, run to the alchemiter and make a tree, which drops an apple, which you bite and are then transported to the Land of Wind and Shade, albeit way high up in the clouds.
13. Get pestered hard by WV, and check in with Rose. Tell her about "hearing voices" after you retrieve your PDA. Try to help Rose prototype the sprite with Sassacre's, but the sprite dodges. Rose drops the book and the resulting tremor makes Nanna's ashes fall on the sprite.
14. Rose picks up the car so you can get the server copy out, but then her connection shorts; watch as the car trundles down into the darkness. Jade checks in with you, and you decide to give Dave the business about being Rose's server player - she's in trouble! Inspect the weird oil all over the place while Dave pesters you - he's looking for Bro's copy of the game. You think Bro's puppet habit is a little dumb, but Dave defense him. He also recommends you read about weaponizing your sylladex, because you feel like you're being followed.
15. Try to read Data Structures for assholes again, but get strifed by an imp! You're too weak to wield a sledgehammer, but sylladexing it works. Level up!
16. You haven't seen her yet, but Nannasprite pranks your ass, and then tells you all kinds of stuff about Skaia! And also that Earth is gone. Then she tells you she'll bake you some cookies - augh!
17. To make room for the Punch Designix, Rose had to move your piano outside. Since you're so livid, she drops the piano on the imp on your pogo ride. She tells you to get the grist it dropped, but you're trying to avoid Nanna's bake-off. Get her to move the pogo ride inside. While Rose starts building up your house, you ride the slime pogo into the living room and kill some imps, but fall on your ass. You flee to the study and Rose traps you in with your fridge. You get humorously distracted by WV asking for a can opener, but Rose kills all the imps in the room that you're not noticing with heavy inanimate objects.
18. Suddenly aware, have some captchananigans. Rose speeds all this up for you and makes you a fresh batch of empty captchalogue cards. After reading Wise Guy, get your idea for combining punched card patterns and make the Pogo Hammer. Write a page for Rose's walkthrough on it.
19. Kill an imp with your crazy bouncing and get launched to the roof. Rose SWEET CATCHES you with a bed so you don't fall through the hole she made with Dad's safe. You fall asleep and almost wake up on Prospit. Almost. Jade's pestering wakes you up.
20. Large imps have been scaling the house for some time, but only now do you notice! Get to the top of the house and fight them. With Nannasprite and Rose's help, defeat the imps.
21. There's one big piece of shale stuck in the hole above Dad's room. Apprehensively go get it and fall in his room! He doesn't seem to be all that into clowns, which causes a mild breakdown.
22. After your recovery, you find some presents that Dad wasn't able to give you! A modus control deck, gushers, and a sweet suit! Get a little punch-card happy. And also see some weird drawings in your room for the first time! Then make so much shit.
23. Beat all kinds of imps up with your new hammers, and jump through your first gate to arrive in the Land of Wind and Shade properly - explore while PM pesters you. Try to contact Rose, but talk to Jade instead - she's finally got her copies of the beta, and apparently you need to be her server player! And Karkat trolls you for the first time – he says he needs to talk to Jade in your present, and claims that you are friends. Then go search for your dad's fallen car.
24. Have a confusing conversation with Nanna about gates. Then get your ass owned by a ton of imps! Looks like Grandpa saves you. You try to save the salamander town with Barbasol, screw it up more, but then a convenient breeze puts it all out. While getting herofied, PM asks you to carve a picture of the server disc sleeve on your uncarved minitablet.
25. You find Dad's car totaled and surrounded by caution tape. Unsurprisingly, the mail is missing. Terezi trolls you and says she wants to mess with your timeline. She has you take a shortcut through a pyxis and nearly lose Liv! You recover her and pull a Con Air stunt.
26. In the middle of the emotional theatrics, Karkat trolls you (#2) and you discuss movies for awhile. Then Terezi punches Karkat for you, apparently. You mention that he wanted to talk to Jade last time. Terezi trolls you right after, and you tell her Karkat wants her to touch his bone bulge and also that she's going to punch him from you. Yeah time shit! Then she says her plan is for you to skip ahead and fight your denizen early. She sends you to a return node back to your house.
27. Terezi asks for the code to your rocketpack shitcluster, which you give her. She gives you the code for a working rocketpack, which you make! Then Dave tells you he's in the Medium, but his sprite seems to want to be prototyped again. You say do whatever seems right, and blast off. In that timeline, you meet Typheus, he gives you the choice, and you die. Then you join an equally dead Vriska in a dream bubble.
28. Future Dave comes back to tell you to stay on the ground. Recall the heartfelt note Dave gave you with Liv and reconsider. Let Dave know you're not going through with it. But you still fly around in the rocketpack for fun. :3
29. Karkat trolls you (#3) while you're in the air. He pastes your prank from the next conversation, talks about the Veil, and how the Reckoning is where BQ/BK turn the Veil on Skaia after WK is captured/killed, also about the labs that are in those meteors. He also makes absolutely sure you know that your team is doomed to fail, and your Reckoning is going to start early.
30. Terezi trolls you with a better map of LOWAS. She's trying to olive branch some peace here. You go through the second gate, which actually takes you to LOLAR! You crash through Rose's window.
31. Talk to Davesprite; he explains how the gate system works, and then you accidentally insult him. Tell Dave where you are, and then thank Davesprite for saving your life. Dave tries to get you to snoop, which you refuse, but he asks you to see if there's a captcha code on the back of the journals. There is? Okay. He mentions that you could totally check out your birthday present while you're here. After some hemming and hawing, you just look at it. It's Liv, but with some knitted additions? You're thankful. Leave Casey the Salamander here.
32. While you're there, Kanaya trolls Rose. Since Rose isn't there to answer... well, since Kanaya isn't able to see you, you manage to trick her. She thinks Rose is dumb, so you tell her to talk to John at the craziest possible point on the timeline.
33. Dave gave you a code earlier, which you go make on Rose's alchemiter. After downscaling it, it makes Fear No Anvil. Davesprite tells you he got it from Hephaestus (his denizen) through some shenanigans.
34. Doesn't seem like Rose is waking up (how wrong you are). Take Dr. Meowgon and blast off! You explore LOLAR and happen upon the turtle cave where Mom was. Inside the cave are some crazy monsters, which you vanquish. Then you step on the transportalizer that Mom and Maplehoof took which...
35. ...takes you to a lab in the Veil. Sassacre's, Li'l Cal, Maplehoof, and an oily dad hat are here. You ride Maplehoof and then wear the junior ectobiologist suit.
36. On the lab equipment screen, watch your Dad and Nanna walk by a Crocker facility that you don't recognize. A meteor destroys it. You paradoxify Nanna. Then see Grandpa and Jade sailing to their island. Paradoxify Grandpa. You see a meteor destroy a record store in the Central United States. Paradoxify Bro. Mom is in the area because Grandpa called her to check out some recent meteoric activity. Watch as your meteor crashes into your family's joke shop and kills Nanna. Mom flees the scene with Rose, but leaves her scarf. Paradoxify Mom.
37. A weird automated sequence creates four paradox clones. The last sequence creates you and your friends. Karkat trolls you and explains what the paradox clones signify! Then you punk him again. You ask him to get back to you in a few minutes, which he does. You feel like you ought to get off the rock, but Karkat says you're alright because the little meteors go first. He also says you're going to start handing out bunnies. He explains why your game is so fucked – Jack Noir – and then you get the idea to reenact Con Air with Rose and Mom. Give the bunny to Rose, then Jade is all waaah so you give Rose's half-knitted bunny to Jade.
38. You watch all the ectobabies get transported into their respective meteors. Meanwhile, Jack is destroying Prospit - you're falling toward the Battlefield when Dream Jade saves your life and Dream You wakes up. Asleep you gets prodded by AR, when the meteor starts flying toward Skaia for some Reckoning fun.. He caution-tapes you to his rocket-board and sends you away to safety. While asleep, you take WQ's ring from dead Dream Jade and see your destination in Skaia's clouds. When you get there, PM hands you Jade's package. There's a letter in there from the mysterious J, and also from Jade. Jade's letter is so saaad.
39. While mid-grief, Jack points a sword at you - you've got the ring, remember? But Liv steps out from the box and scares him away!
40. You crash-land back on LOWAS on AR/Bro's rocketboard. Still asleep, you see Dad and Mom on Skaia! You jump a gap to reunite with your dad, but then Vriska manages to manipulate you awake. WQ's ring falls into the river below.
41. Vriska trolls you. You feel like you've talked to her before, but this is her first time talking to you. You want to go back to sleep, but she reminds you that you have to connect to Jade! The pyxis system delivers, and you get your beta! You talk to Vriska some more, and she asks what you were dreaming about. You talk about your dad and guardians and lusii. Also, you learn Karkat's name! Vriska is about to make you a map, but then you tell her about Terezi's. And Vriska tells you about the prototyping chain.
42. You get back to your house. God damn these imps!!11 You take a moment to observe your ripped movie posters, and instruct Vriska on the magic of Con Air. And she tells you to get rid of your bucket; you don't understand that filial pail thing.
43. Your house is huge! Talk to Rose to see what's going on. She seems to know everything and is getting a little dangerous. She wants you to break things!
44. Make a new Cosbytop. Vriska trolls you for wasting time again, but tells you to make a new outfit first. You empty your sylladex for her. She makes you look... like her.
45. Talk to Alpha-Future Dave while you're all up in the air! He gets your boonbuck from you. And you learn that he's been busy! Also he mentions “no Vriska, we talked about this.” Her name is Vriska, eh? While installing the server disc, you piss her off royally by trolling her “without permission.”
46. Karkat trolls you and distracts you. Fuck! Apparently this conversation is nonlinear. He says he needs to discuss something with you in a memo. He tells you to stay away from Vriska because she's crazy, but her liking you is news to you! You have no idea about the quadrants and you don't think Karkat would ever make a romantic advance on you. Then connect to Jade. Finally. Then Nanna pies you in the face! And catches you.
47. She gives you her summon-amulet. And punks you. Anyways, Jade. You deploy a bunch of stuff in her house while she's asleep. There's all kinds of junk in the registry now! You talk to Jade about Karkat and getting her up to speed and all kinds of stuff like that. You open her cruxtruder and nearly hurt her.
48. You wonder what to prototype her sprite with. You set up Jade's entry item stuff and make a mess of things when you move the Typheus minion. You ask Rose if it's possible to prototype with nothing; she says it's the worst thing you could possibly do, and tells you some preliminary stuff about the Tumor. And also that your LOWAS is on fire.
49. You try to prototype Jade's sprite with some silly doll, but Vriska puts you to sleep right before you can. While you're asleep, you see WV in a stream holding WQ's ring.
50. You wake up in LOWAS's ocean of oil. You pester Jade, but she's not answering! Rose pesters you instead, and reminds you that your planet is on fire. You lament her changed attitude, but you get her to be goofy anyways. She tells you about the Tumor, and also that you're going to be talking to Karkat and Vriska soon! WV is trolling you this whole time.
51. Karkat trolls you and tells you exactly why you all screwed up; you prototyped with Bec is why. Bec is an omnipotent First Guardian, and giving his powers to Bec was an idiot idea. He tells you how he saw Jack on Prospit before Jack killed his dreamself.
52. The fire is getting closer; Vriska trolls you and tells you she was the one that put you to sleep! You are pretty pissed about that, but she explains the paradox space stuff and you guess you can stand that. WV tells you to do the windy thing, which you don't understand and then suddenly... do.
53. After it subsides, you rocket to the top of your echeladder! Vriska congratulates you and then tells you to go find your Quest Bed so you can hit god tier. You find it, and ask her to put you to sleep. Jack arrives in your sleep and kills you. You die on LOWAS and start bleeding on a similar quest bed on the Battlefield. Your dream self turns into your god self.
54. WV follows you around on the Battlefield. You find Dad's wallet. There's a spare car in there?? And the Crosbytop! WV hops in the sweet ride before you can re-captchalogue it. You hop in and use the windy thing to get the car flying.
55. Check in with Jade. You've seen her goings-on in the clouds! You talk about frogs, and trolls, and Dave, and all kinds of stuff like that! Jade mentions that she found your dad already – he and mom are having a tea party somewhere! Then Karkat trolls you and it sounds like he's about to die! You try to get back to him, but since he's left the lab you get backwards-marching hate-Karkat.
56. Either you or WV accidentally crashes the car. Whoops! You enter the castle and Vriska trolls you, congratulating you on your sweet new windsock hoodie and also hoping that you aren't mad. And she tells you this isn't where your dad's going to be. She waxes poetic on the nature of the game and troll culture. She also reminds you that she intends to kill Jack, so you better be ready to cause some scratch if she fails! Use the wind; get the Tumor.
57. Then meet CD and Liv with WV. Liv is missing all her weapons, which presumably were lost in the breeze, on which Zillyhoo suddenly rides and dooks you on the head! It's doofy and gavel-sized, but Liv hugens it for you.
58. Then it would seem that WV ate Liv's monstrosifier eye. CD amends the situation and you ask Liv to captain an enormous Dersite battleship, which she littlefies. You give the wallet containing the Tumor to WV, and tell Liv that she must set a course for Derse, where they will deliver the Tumor.
59. After sending the party away, you notice a cloud of grimdarkness on the other side of the planet. You walk straight into it and “go dark” on Vriska's screen. There you encounter Rose, who seems to have gone off the deep end in a big way! You go to fight Jack, but he stabs you again, killing you.
60. Because your death was neither heroic nor just, you come back to life. Vriska has been trolling you through Rose's hubtopband, telling you about reviving Rose, what her plan is - plus giving you the code for the Fluorite Octet and asking you out on a d8! Kiss Rose to wake her up on Derse and take her needlekind specibus, but to your surprise Karkat responds to your attempt to talk to Vriska. He tells you about the plan with the yellow yard, and you head to LOHAC as per his instructions, to cause the Scratch and deal with the inevitable onslaught that follows. While there, you happily endure Karkat's first trolling attempt. He trolls you a bit, blackrom-propositions you, and then you tell him you have to go cause the scratch!
61. Okay, you do that. You set the Quill in motion and everyone in LOHAC decides they want a piece of you. You take 'em out with Vriskahoo and lava tornadoes. A little later, Dog Jade stops by and pulls you on her battleship before shrinking every planet and careening through a Fourth Wall of her own creation.

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

You can...run out of space in posts?\

FRICK

[slapdashDuckette]

The limit seems to be 60,000 characters, I think.

[slapdashDuckette]

Rose Lalonde

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1. Your meteor lands in a lake near a lab on the eastern US. No aquatic life would survive.
2. Have therapist sessions with Jaspers. He tells you his secret and then disappears! You find his body in a stream weeks later. Mom has a mausoleum built for him.
3. For your birthday (12/4), you get some knitting supplies from John, and an enormous princess doll from Mom, which you later Lovecraft with your knitting supplies. Get trolled by Kanaya for the first time. Jade tells you about her present for John, and also that Jaspers could come back to life through SBURB! You decide to knit him something for his birthday.
4. Earlier in the day (4/13), get pestered by your mother. It's evening and raining outside, which seems to be messing with your wireless signal.
   ---
5. Since Dave seems to be too cool to play, pester John to see if he has the beta. He doesn't! Talk to Jade about it, and she's cagey, as usual. Drat.
6. Install both the server and the client versions of SBURB.
7. Be John's server player. Screw up his house by putting his magic chest on his roof, add on to his room, and deploy all the alchemy nonsense in the most confusing locations possible.
8. Ask John to explore and figure out what the devices are supposed to do. In the meantime, remove John's toilet, and while moving the bathtub to the driveway, your connection dies.
9. Help John open the cruxtruder, and check out GameFAQs for some help. Prototype his kernelsprite with the maimed harlequin doll. Decide to make your own walkthrough once John is safe. You try to move the tub again, but only succeed in hindering John more when your connection is lost once again.
10. You make your way to the Observatory, which you think is closer to the lab with the strong wifi signal. You notice a lot of meteorites falling.
11. You reconnect after John enters the Medium, and you make sure your client player is alive. Write another page of your walkthrough while helping him retrieve his PDA. The meteorites have started a forest fire. Try to prototype the sprite again, fail a lot, and drop Sassacre's, which dumps Nanna's ashes on the sprite.
12. While attempting to pick up Dad's car to retrieve the server disc, lose your connection again and drop the car, which crumbles a bit of the supporting pillar and dooms the car to a horrible fall.
13. You try going through the front door to avoid Mom and check on the transformer. You lose track of time in planning your next round of refrigerator-oneupmanship, and Mom arrives! Youth roll into some wizards. You attempt to abscond, but Mom strifes you instead.
14. Since you've already encountered mom, no point going out the front. You go out the back like you'd originally planned, only to find that the transformer was struck by lightning and is beyond your means of repair. You know there's a portable generator next to Jaspers's mausoleum - you go there.
15. Fire up the generator, and watch John's Nannasprite follies while Dave talks to you about Bro's puppets and finding the server disc. Watch Nanna's explanation and update your walkthrough.
16. In order to deploy the punch designix, you move the piano outside and to placate John's rage over the imp on his pogo ride, deposit it on an imp. You need him to get the grist, but he wants to avoid Nanna's bake-off, so you humor him and bring him his pogo ride.
17. Start building. Kill an imp with the fridge and then block John into the study with the Designix. Since John is unresponsive and forgot his PDA, you drop a safe on an imp and reveal the goodies hidden inside! Update your walkthrough, continue to build, save John's life again.
18. You make a shortcut to the alchemiter and throw a tub through his wall. You make a heap of blank captcha cards for John. Make a handicapped rocket pack from John's random code.
19. Try to get the SBURB server CD captcha code, but there isn't one! Right as John tells you he's going to take a quick nap, your generator fails. Get rad pissed at the generator, but then a secret passage opens in the mausoleum! Descend and enter the lab.
20. One of the hubs on the grid appears unlocked! In a sylladex accident, vaporize Jasper. Fix up your tree and take the hub with you. After inspecting a meteor-tracker, reconnect and save John from the large imps with Nannasprite's help.
21. Let John know you'll be gone for awhile, because you've found a timer that probably relates to the meteor heading for the lab. Steal a scarf from what is probably your mom's room and meet Mutie.
22. Mess with an appearifier in mom's room! Paradoxify alive-Jaspers, then appearify dead-Jaspers and take the escapealizer before the laboratory is unestablished.
23. Escapealize into mom's boozeroom as a meteor unestablishes the lab. Finally return to your own room, where John is about to get alchemizing and is totally ignorant that he drew all over his posters. Talk him through what may have been a revelation. Then, do a number to John's house.
24. Dave finally connects to you! He screws up your house (what else is new), throws Zazzerpan out the window, and then disappears? You run to go get your entry item, which is a bar with a single bottle. The broken Zazzerpan hand flies into the bottle-item, throwing it over the waterfall. You jump in after it and catch it, and Jaspersprite saves you. Breaking the bottle teleports your house away from the meteor, and into the Land of Light and Rain.
25. Get pestered (?) by WQ; explore. She tells you to find your sprite! Also, Dave pesters you, but your laptop is too cozied to hear him. At WQ's urging, go follow the mysterious footprints through the secret mausoleum tunnel, and out to a pier. Mom set sail from here.
26. From the pier, talk to John about where you are right now, and get trolled by Terezi about the exiles and their role in the game. Then tell Dave what's going on.
27. WQ tells you what to do one last time (find your sprite; realize your purpose), then you try mom's martini. The predictable occurs.
28. Knitwallop an ogre. Dave tells you to kill it because he needs the grist. Then Tavros trolls you, asking how to get Dave's goat. You suggest poetry. Kanaya trolls you (your #2, her #7) after talking to Dave for a similar purpose. She lets you know that you're going to be ridiculously sarcastic in future conversations.
29. Go talk to Jaspersprite. In the weirdest way, he tells you you have to write the letters or play the song that makes life possible. He mentions waking up, which reminds you of Jade, so you talk to Jade while she's asleep. Jade explains your dream self and that prodding your unconscious might wake you up! She also lets you know there's writing on your walls. Holy shit, you say. You try to get Dave to screencap your room, but he's out and about. You decide to go to sleep. At that moment, Future Dave fixes the alternate timeline and Future Dream Rose stops existing; she merges with you and you fall asleep instantly.
30. Your dreamself awakens, and notices MEOW written over and over on the walls. You realize that this is Jaspers's secret, and that MEOW is also GCAT? While asleep, wander over to Dave's dreamtower. Yarnbonk him to wake him up. You two jam on Derse for awhile. Dream Li'l Cal pisses you off, so you throw him out the window. You and Dave chill at his computer, and it looks like John is using your alchemiter. Also, John had your #3 conversation with Kanaya.
31. You wake up and get Gusherbucket-pranked by John. Then you watch him leave.
    32. Go alchemy-happy. You make something cool to wear, the Thorns of Oglogoth, and your hubtopband. Then enact some serious aggression on some imps.
32. Start taking orders from the gods of the Furthest Ring. Tell Dave about it, and tell him to look up at the sky on Derse without his shades sometime, and maybe he'd hear them calling. Davesprite pesters you and asks why you're burning the book in this timeline. Apparently MEOW wasn't important before.
33. Kill things. A lot of things. While you're at it, Kanaya trolls you (#4 for you, #3 for her) and doesn't sound happy to talk to you. You pull off the sarcasm pretty well. After having conversations 5-7, destroy the gate above your house. Compose your final entry in the walkthrough. The gods disperse the signal.
34. Kanaya hops to 8=8. You're excited! She's shocked that you blew up your gate.
    John pesters you - you've been busy, and so has he. You tell him you're going to rip the game apart at the seams, which spooks him. You take apart a pink turtle island. And Kanaya trolls you (#16) - she's wondering why you're blowing up turtle island, and tells you that she read your walkthrough. She tells you about being a Prospit dreamer, and warns you about the dark gods. You ask – when did she read it? Awhile ago, she says. She says you may be dangerous, and that your screen goes black after a certain point. You ask if she knows anything about the Green Sun. She doesn't.
35. Experience the Bitter Ass Famine. First, Eridan tries to proposition you, but then asks you to teach him magic. You show him your moves. Aradia trolls you, and tries to get you to stop. You can't possibly do anything constructive with the Green Sun. Finally, Nepeta asks if she can talk to Jasper. You come upon a more permanent solution. Say goodbye to Jaspers.
36. Start talking to Doc Scratch (not shown, but otherwise she'd never come up with her plan).
37. Research Skaia using your crystal ball. Read by the light of burning LOWAS. John pesters you to ask if it's possible not to prototype; you don't want to influence the future, so you tell him the worst thing he could do is that, because then the Battlefield would be unable to heal and the Tumor would never come to being.
38. John falls asleep. When he wakes up, you remind him that his planet's on fire. He's sad about your new behavior but you manage to be funny again. You tell him about the tumor, and that he's about to get trollllled. Then Dave wakes up and checks in with you. He saw the horrorterrors; they seem to be calling for help. You say saving them would save reality!
39. Then you explain to Dave your plan to send your dream self to blow up the Green Sun. You fly up and away from LOLAR, presumably to fly to Dave's planet.
40. Kanaya trolls you. She jokes about training Eridan to oppose you, but really she just gave him a wand to shut him up. She really doesn't want you to get your dreamself killed, though.
41. Talk to Doc Scratch on the nature of jokes, pranks, and lies. He tells you you aren't responsible for causing the scratch – someone else is, and also that the Scratch isn't what banishes Jack. In fact, it doesn't do anything you thought it did - it's a hard reset that will obliviate your timeline and start afresh with one that has more favorable circumstances. You're not sure what to do next, so Scratch gives you a cue ball. Upon asking it what to do next, it tells you to answer Jade. She tells you Mom is dead; today is full of bad surprises.
42. Jade isn't sure the gods are good news; she says you ought to ask the ball if they're evil or not. You ask, and go grimdark. You fail to resist the urge to seek revenge, and head for the Battlefield.
43. You arrive at the castle where Jack is, and hunt him down. You find John, who can't understand what you're saying, but you lead him to his dead Dad anyway. He's mad enough to join you in the fight, but Jack kills him before he can do anything. You fight Jack on your own, and he kills you.
44. After Liv arrives and delivers the Tumor, you and Dave come up with a plan to get to the Green Sun - Dave writes a program that will fly Derse's moon to the Green Sun. You puzzle over how to sever the moon when a Royal Deringer appears out of nowhere, and Dave makes the cut. While you had initially promised the piloting job to Dave, you never intended for him to go - you yarnbonk him to knock him out, and leave on your own with Liv.
45. You pull Dave into a dreambubble about his crowdream while en route, and gradually help him remember recent events. Then he bubble-joins you on the moon, because he can't figure out how to wake up. You offer to help as long as he doesn't try to go save you. That doesn't end up happening, because DD arrives on the moon and stabs bubble-Dave.
46. Awake Dave flies to you and stabs DD; you fly the rest of the dark path together. At bomb point, you happen upon your quest tombs, and stand on them while you let the Tumor birth the Green Sun out of the ashes of two universes. You and Dave emerge from the Green Sun more god tier than ever before.

Also, these are all open for scrutiny, so if you find something that's wrong/misplaced/missing/unclear, feel free to say so.

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

Quit working harder than meeeeee

[merton]

This is an awesome project.

I was wondering: would it be useful to track the progress of certain key minor characters as well? Because I can see timelines for certain time-travelling artifacts such as Liv Tyler the bunny and Lil' Cal being worth documenting.

EDIT: I went ahead and made a Lil' Cal timeline.

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1. Originates on Derse as a subconscious representation of Dave's inner psyche, perhaps in relation to his feeling towards Bro (sup freud).
2. Is pitched out the window; lands on a conveniently-passing rocket board, which transports it to the ectobiology lab in the Veil.
3. Travels back in time to Earth with baby Bro via meteor. Assumedly becomes Bro's childhood toy/mentor/object of sexual desire.
4. Is used by by Bro to torment Dave during his formative years, becoming a powerful subconscious symbol for the young boy and as such ensuring its own creation.
5. While being used as a weapon by Bro in his battle with Dave, is sliced in half.
5a. In the doomed timeline in which John follows Terezi's advice and flies to the seventh gate early, is prototyped with Dave's sprite.
6. In the alpha timeline, is recovered by Bro and stitched back together.
7. Is taken as a trophy by Jack Noir after defeating Bro.
8. After Noir enters the trolls' universe, is thrown at a doomed Aradiabot, who escapes with the puppet back to Alternia via meteor.
9. The meteor carrying Cal and the Aradiabot crashes on Alternia, where it is found by alive Araida. This meteor allows Aradia to discover the subterranean frog temple, leading to the creation of Sgrub.
10. Aradia sends Lil' Cal to Kanaya to be mended, who gives the puppet a dapper green suit.
11. Via the machinations of Doc Scratch, the Team Charge debacle occurs, leading to the creation of the t1CKt0ck8r8kH34DS code. This code, along with a doomed timeline Gamzee's honkHONK code, is used by the Black Queen to ectobiologically create Doc Scratch from Lil' Cal and a magic cue ball. Therefore, Doc Scratch's actions are designed to ensure his own existence.
12. The suit-wearing Lil' Cal puppet is later used by alpha timeline Gamzee in the veil to freak out Terezi.

I'll add in links tomorrow when I have more time.