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Thread: CHUMROLL 2: (Traditional Rude Joke Regarding Trollslum)

  1. #276
    Has too many lowbloods leonicReaper's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    ==> Be the weird glowing.. kid.


    You try incredibly hard to be the glowing kid. It is difficult, but you succeed. You have a feeling this is because he was willing to let you be him for this small introductory text, and that he may kick you out again later.

    Your name is AURUM. You do not have a last name. You are the FIRST GUARDIAN of an Earth alternate to the one that is in range of the GREEN SUN, which means you lack the powers associated with it, but do not lack powers completely. You are still pretty OMNISCIENT and you can TELEPORT (...within fifteen feet of yourself,) and you have quite a bit of KNOWLEDGE about ancient things and some GAME that is constantly in your head despite never having learned about it. You figure this is because you are a FIRST GUARDIAN, and so after all, you would know anything and everything about the universe!

    Actually, that is a lie, and a pretty blatant one. While you possess GREAT KNOWLEDGE, most of it is hidden away in your mind and you cannot access it. In fact, you are really pretty UNINFORMED about things and until recently you were even convinced that ROME was still a major power. You'd barely even HEARD of "America" until you started using your powers of OMNISCIENT OBSERVATION to watch the youth of said country, which is when you began to observe the distribution of an ODD VIDEO GAME that made houses disappear and asteroids start to fall from the sky, which is NOT GOOD NEWS!

    Something tells you there is NO WAY TO STOP IT now that it has started, so you resolve to JOIN a promising pack of human children in their adventure through the game using an old laptop that you found in the nearby RUINS. (You would later obtain the captcha code for the very same laptop and place it in the ruins for your past self to find.) You think First Guardians are probably NOT supposed to play this game, but you won't have any of that - sometimes you just have to stick it to the man and do what you want. Man, sometimes you forget that you're still technically a child.

    You love things that are GOLD, especially white gold, and like to collect things that are SHINY. You're a bit immature and slow to trust people, but once you do, you're sure to keep them safe and advise them as best as you can. You get pretty frustrated when people don't do as you ask or advise, however, so your advice can be a double-edged sword to your relations with others.

    Your chumhandle is opulentObserver and you do your best to make your speech visible, but it's really rather hard when you love gold as much as you do.

    You do not have a symbol visible on your body but you represent yourself with your crest.
    You fight with a longswordKind strife specibus, and you have no use for a modus as you can store things in your own personal hammerspace. (You sometimes forget that you've done this, however, and things tend to get lost permanently because of it.)

    You live on a secluded island all by yourself, but you have SHARKS to keep you company. You love sharks. They're very kind creatures, even if they attempt to eat you because you CAN'T FLY very well and fall into the water when you try to hover over them.

    TLDR/Info:
    Name: Aurum
    Age: ????
    Title: Heir of Hope
    Chumhandle: opulentObserver
    Strife Specibus: longswordKind
    Current weapon: Longsword
    Land: Land of Clouds and Shards
    Consorts: Yellow Iguanas
    Sprite: Sharksprite

    BONUS:
    Last edited by leonicReaper; 12-22-2011 at 02:21 AM.


  2. #277
    Knight of Void zblueboltz's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    ==>Be what'shisface?

    Last edited by zblueboltz; 12-24-2011 at 07:35 PM.

  3. #278
    Thief Cleptomanic's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    ==> Be bored enough to betray all of your principles and make a fan kid even though you told yourself to never do that ever, EVER.


    You are now Ruby Marters and you turned 13 years old today (14th of April, 2009).



    Last edited by Cleptomanic; 01-28-2012 at 12:19 PM. Reason: Added Strife Specibus, Added TL;DR, Added Family Circumstances

  4. #279
    Eternally Pissed Off Dudemaster47's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    > Be eternally pissed off the self-insert.


    Your name is ALEX HILLER and you TURNED 15 A FEW MONTHS AGO (January 8th, 2009). But, obviously, today is in fact APRIL 13, 2009 AND WHY WOULD IT BE ANYTHING DIFFERENT?

    Anyway. You are an AMATEUR MUSICIAN, playing both the CLARINET and the SAXOPHONE. You think you're PRETTY GOOD, but you could be a lot better if you GOT OFF YOUR LAZY ASS AND PRACTICED. This goes for pretty much everything else, too. You are also a GAMER, obviously. So it goes to show that you are TOTALLY PSYCHED about this new game SBURB that's coming out. It sounds so awesome! Like...the Legend of Zelda, the Sims, and chess all mixed into one! Or something. You also have a FORUM ADVENTURE which you've pretty much GIVEN UP ON EVER MAKING called the ELEMENTAL GANG. It remains an INJOKE among you and your friends as you HAVE ALL THE CHARACTERS AND PLANS MADE, but NONE OF THE ARTISTIC ABILITY TO MAKE IT.

    ANYWAY...you like to think you're a pretty cool guy. You tend to be PRETTY CHILL most of the time, although you are EASILY PISSED OFF. This happens especially when things don't go your way or if people contradict you or cannot grasp basic (to you) concepts. As a result, you tend to RANT ABOUT COMPLICATED THINGS SUCH AS TIME TRAVEL. This is because you're generally very sure that EVERYONE ELSE IS PRETTY MUCH COMPLETELY WRONG AND THEY REALLY NEED TO BE CORRECTED ON THIS. No one ever listens to you because of this, despite the fact that YOU THINK YOUR PLANS AND IDEAS ARE PRACTICALLY FOOLPROOF AND EXTREMELY LOGICAL. You think that they are, anyway.

    But hey, you're never the leader, even when you try to be and yell as loud as you can. You guess it just doesn't work that way for everyone.

    ANYWAY. You have a LOT OF WEAPONS, and as a result kind of OVERDID IT BUYING STRIFE SPECIBUS CARDS. So now, instead of a FETCH MODUS, you simply use your STRIFE PORTFOLIO for storage (thank god for bagKind!). This would eventually lead to you choosing your PREFERRED SPECIBUS, BATKIND, out of many such as SWORDKIND, HAMMERKIND, or AXEKIND.

    It's hell when you need to find things that AREN'T weapons though, and you kind of wish you had a specibus that ALLOWED FOR TOTAL STORAGE OF ANYTHING. But that's a pipe dream.

    Anyway, your chumhandle is screwballSparky and you tend to talk in a pretty laid back but still correct fashion. If you were to play a CERTAIN GAME, you would be the SEER OF VOID in the LAND OF FLAME AND SHADOW.

    tl;dr
    Last edited by Dudemaster47; 12-31-2011 at 01:31 PM.
    I'm on pesterchum (sometimes). Pester me as screwballSparky or as one of my many trolls.
    COFFEEQUEST: Coffee, aliens, and zombies, apparently. Avatar courtesy of аshdenej.

  5. #280

    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    ==> Be the dumb redneck.


    Excuse you? I don't think I heard y'all correctly, why don't you try that again?

    ==> Err, be the good-natured southerner.


    S'what I thought you said.

    Your name is KATE WINSOR and you turned 13 SEVERAL MONTHS AGO on August 7th. (200

    You have a variety of INTERESTS. You've got a mighty fine interest in TAXIDERMY, and you're proud to say you're pretty good at it. You also enjoy HORSE BACK RIDING and PLAYING VIDEOGAMES. You are also pretty darned enthusiastic about OLD MOVIES, you've got a pretty damn massive collection of VHS tapes and posters, all in black and white and featuring STUDLY COWPOKES WITH CHIPS ON THEIR SHOULDERS. But your all-time favorites are Westerns starring your man, your honeypie, your sweetie doll...

    Okay so John Wayne's dead, big deal. The Duke is YOUR Duke and you love him and someday you will time travel back to meet him and you'll get married and that is final... Actually please don't ever let anybody hear that, that is purely for your own fantasy, you would never tell a soul.

    Actually, even if you wanted to tell someone, you don't know that many people, seeing as you live at 000 EMPTY STREET, WEST BUMBLEFUCK, IN NOWHERESVILLE, TEXAS. Okay maybe not exactly, but you're so far out west that you don't have a street name, so you might as well be. It's really just you and your Grandad out there on the cattle ranch.

    Speaking of your Grandad, he's a pretty cool guy. He's like 87 or something and he still drives the Cattle like a man in his prime.


    It's possible he's immortal, you're not sure.

    Anyway, he homeschooled you as well as taught you the ways of RANCHING as well as a variety of SURVIVAL SKILLS he picked up in his years as an honest to God COWBOY. You look up to your Grandad so much, he is everything you aspire to be.

    Though growing up largely secluded has been... difficult. You've very few friends, and all of them are online. When you meet new people, they often think you're a boy, but you are not, you are a lady and goshdarnit you wish they'd stop acting like you were a dude just because you talk like your Grandad. They gotta clean their fool heads out and realize they can't judge a person based on their damned text I swear.

    You're a bit of a TOMBOY but that's okay, you go for NECESSITY rather than more superfluous things.

    Your chumhandle is kinkyTaxidermist and just 'cause you use some slang terms and shorten words, don't mean you're dumb.

    Currently, your copy of Sburb is travelling across TEXAS in a UPS Truck, attempting to reach your incredibly out of the way Ranch.

    It's a shame, because even when you get it, you're pretty sure you have nobody to play it with.

    If you DO ever get to play it, however, you would be whisked off into THE LAND OF CASTLES AND CLIFFS. You would find yourself as the PRIEST OF SOUL.

    Also, you wield the SHOVELKIND STRIFE SPECIBUS.

    TL: DR


    FUN EXTRA THINGS

    PESTERCHUM

  6. #281
    like a cooler lex luthor scientificBlues's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: A Low-Fat Alternative to Trollslum

    Because I was cursed by the ghost of a cat that I may or may not have eaten, Chumroll is forever an imperfect mirror of trollslum. To reinforce this point, the index has been rearranged to be alphabetized by chumhandle initials! Ooh, ahh. Let's all glare in the general direction of momatoes and shake our heads in disappointment at her for making me actually get off my lazy rear and do some work.

    Quote Originally Posted by ThisIsZen View Post
    ==>Be the agoraphobe bookworm.

    That's inaccurate in several ways. Perhaps try something a bit closer to true?
    Quote Originally Posted by kinkyTaxidermist View Post
    ==> Be the dumb redneck.

    Excuse you? I don't think I heard y'all correctly, why don't you try that again?
    I like both of these a lot!! Thumbs way up.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cleptomanic View Post
    ==> Be bored enough to betray all of your principles and make a fan kid even though you told yourself to never do that ever, EVER.

    You are now Ruby Marters and you turned 13 years old today (14th of April, 2009).
    Many have tried, few have succeeded. This is how a joke character is done, folks. Study close, because you won't see another this solid for a long while.

  7. #282
    Trollslum Cafe Regular Tekkenfreak4's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    OOC / Self insert FanHuman's Handle: acidReign
    My main blog
    Avatar by TheNeonWerewolf


  8. #283
    like a cooler lex luthor scientificBlues's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    I miss nothing.

    You saw nothing.

  9. #284
    A Repose for Reason ThisIsZen's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Oh, wow. Thanks a ton, SB!
    Your Pesterchum handle is dyingOrbit, and you're usually at the very least idling about. If you want to get at one of my characters specifically, just drop a line there. I also have a(n empty) tumblr I guess?
    [They meet us here on the block / They key broke off in the lock / I'll meet you down at the well / I'll meet you down at the well.]

  10. #285
    trilbyulationDungeoneer trilbyulatingDungeoneer's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Is there a non-troll, non-human fancharacter thread out there? :L

  11. #286
    Marvelous Femurs Modmin ashdenej's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Quote Originally Posted by trilbyulatingDungeoneer View Post
    Is there a non-troll, non-human fancharacter thread out there? :L
    The Chumroll is for miscellaneous aliens, too! i.e. this thread. Just check the first post, haha.

  12. #287
    Avatar by Maya MostlyHarmless's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Quote Originally Posted by trilbyulatingDungeoneer View Post
    Is there a non-troll, non-human fancharacter thread out there? :L
    Quote Originally Posted by scientificBlues View Post
    Thread 1!

    Man, don't you wish you could keep track of all these fanmade human (or miscellaneous alien) characters popping up everywhere?
    You're in it.

    Edit: Masterful ninjary there Mr Ash.
    Spoilered Signature Tomfoolery

  13. #288
    Thief Cleptomanic's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Aww, thanks SB! Though I was really only bored when making her, roleplaying as Ruby on pesterchum is a lot more fun than expected.

  14. #289
    Trollslum Cafe Regular Tekkenfreak4's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Quote Originally Posted by scientificBlues View Post
    I miss nothing.

    You saw nothing.
    Are....are you a ninja?
    OOC / Self insert FanHuman's Handle: acidReign
    My main blog
    Avatar by TheNeonWerewolf


  15. #290
    trilbyulationDungeoneer trilbyulatingDungeoneer's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Wooo! That'll teach me for not reading through!

    Weird, that's like the only time I haven't.

    Also I'm going to assume nobody will mind if I post images done in different programs, without regular sprites?

    ==> Be the first of many Cyborg Lego Minifigs.


    (click through for full-sized image! (Other perspective, no land)

    Okay, you are now that guy.

    Your name is Necrosa and your age is basically irrelevant at this point. You are one of the many players of your bizzarely OPEN-ENDED SESSION, and just one of the inhabitants of your POST-APOCALYPTIC PLANET. Your kind have, using various methods, STAVED OFF DEATH by transforming to a MECHANICAL STATE, to varying degrees. You are also bombarded with BIZZARE LIFE FORMS from ALL ACROSS THE MULTIVERSE, which has lead to more than one case of the SHENANIGANS.

    After entering you distanced yourself from your CO-PLAYERS, only returning to aid in the destruction of the RIDICULOUSLY OVERPROTOTYPED BLACK KING. Your consorts are PURPLE OCTOPI, and yes, you are mostly a skeleton at this point.

    Your WARPCODEK is dessicatedTripod, and your SBURB title is the Thief of Change. You prototyped your sprite, foolishly as it turns out, with a HIVE TYRANT.


    Your planet is the Land of Turbines and Mountains, and you wield the ROBOTKIND strife specibus.

    TL;DR:


    ==> Okay, now be the second one.


    (Other perspective, inc. land)

    Well yeah, obviously.

    Your name is Kanden and you are another of the IMMORTAL CYBORG INHABITANTS of Necrosa's planet. You're actually just a HEAD by now, but that's no reason to stop EXPLODING THINGS.

    You have spent your time almost exclusively both in and out of your session developing the most DEADLY AND EFFICIENT FIREARMS possible, and your right arm is currently home to a built-in version of the most impressive one you've been able to muster.

    You are the KNIGHT OF GUNS and your consorts are BLACK BATS. Nobody should be surprised at this point to learn that your strife specibus is CANNONKIND. You prototyped your sprite with a close friend of yours, CYBORG TEDDY ROOSEVELT, who was at the time equipped with a CHAINSAW ROCKET LAUNCHER.



    Yeah, you're genuinely amazed that you didn't all die the instant you entered.

    Your WarpCodek is loosecannonConqueror and your planet is the Land of Frost and Fortification.

    TL;DR:



    ==> Be the Third.



    Your name is Varisson, and you are the BADDEST ASS EVER. There is no game that has not been TAMED, no enemy UNBEATEN, and no army that has failed to be MERCILESSLY BENT TO YOUR WILL.

    On your readily established PLANET, you were at the heart of a ROVING BAND OF WARRIORS, patrolling the ENDLESS DESERT in search of ENEMIES TO SUBJUGATE. As soon as SBURB hit your world, you were the first to volunteer, and your LEGION OF APPRENTICES stayed behind. Perhaps due to your ability to "MAKE FRIENDS AND INFLUENCE PEOPLE", you immediately gained to summon creatures to your side during battle.

    You are the LORD OF MONS and you take no god damn prisoners. Your WarpCodek is kickassWarlord and you have replaced most of your body with THE MOST AWESOME MECHASUIT ANYBODY COULD ASK FOR. It has fucking blunderbusses, guys. BLUNDERBUSSES.

    When you enter the game, yours will be the Land of Stature and Ruin. Your CONSORTS will be BLUE ANTS.


  16. #291
    Perspective Change. Now. VeritasUnae's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    ==> Be the character profile that's been hiding in your signature.

    Well, if you insist. But you supplant an image as well, to make this extra special.

    (hair supplied by Avinoch)

    ==> Veritas: Skip to the end.

    This session has failed. You briefly regard your short history. Your name is VERITAS UNAE, a kid of the planet EARTH. You happen to be a DERSE dreamer, with the title PAGE OF KNOW(LEDGE). The session recognises you as the monosyllabic term, but you extrapolated the second half yourself. Your session ended a while ago. You still remain due to WEIRD PLOT SHIT. Even weirder is your ability to BREAK THE FOURTH WALL and you enjoy BECOMING MORE META. Unfortunately, it usually confuses a lot of people so you avoid doing it in Pesterchum. Your interests include PLAYING MALLET PERCUSSION and READING. You even have gone so far as to set your specibus to BOOKKIND. Usually a useless specibus, you had alchemised a TOME OF MAGICAL POTENTIAL upon entering the Medium, but it was left back on your planet, the LAND OF MUSIC AND TECHNOLOGY with your OWL consorts. After PLAYING THE COMPUTER and UNMUTING THE MUSIC, you reached the coveted top rung of your echeladder, ELECTRO GYPSY. You are currently asleep on your planet, perpetually awake in Derse due to the HORRORTERRORS that keep you in the FARTHEST RING. Without that tome, or at least ascension to Godhood, you wouldn't be able to fight back against the Horrorterrors and leave the Furthest Ring to help other sessions. Your Inventory Modus is BOOK, where all of the articles are captchalogued into a large book. The more items, the heavier it is to carry around. But you don't really use it much any more. Your sprite is a SELF WRITING STORY SPRITE that is made of a BLANK BOOK and a DARKENED INK VIAL. It's pretty much told you all it knows; all you use it for now is to write down notes of interest and other meta-based readings. The one other power that has been granted to you since entering the medium was a mild form of TECHNOKINESIS, communion over technology. COMPUTER DATA is, after all, just a lower form of KNOWLEDGE. It's how you managed to coax your portable laptop to the Farthest Ring so you could try and find someone to help you.

    ==> Veritas: Embark on a new journey.

    You do as such! After briefly meeting with trolls through Pesterchum, you find your sphere of influence crossing theirs. After your planet is destroyed, through the space and time of the Incipisphere you find your realself flung into another session holding several trolls! You take your place as the 6th player, replacing the deceased player, MAELUR. From the Farthest Ring, you collect all of the players' computers, acting as an overseeing eye to the game taking place. But you don't know how invested in that you are any more due to the roleplay destabilising. You have a want to turn it into a forum adventure, of course, but you're waiting until you have time for that to happen. And again you venture into the realm of meta. You've got to stop doing that.

    ==> Veritas: Recall events pre-Sburb

    Right, priorities, you almost forgot. You are a NINETEEN year old HUMAN from LOS ANGELES in AMERICA. You moved out of your parent's house where your BROTHER, DEMESTA UNAE still lives. You now live on campus at UCLA, where you had begun studying PSYCHOLOGY, before the Sburb game was released, obviously. You also have a keen interest in MALLET PERCUSSION, having saved a great deal of money to purchase a MARIMBA. Literally. That was a good $8000 dollars you saved. Took a good long 4 years of video game deprivation. But you love playing that thing.

    Your chumhandle is calculatedTechnique and you end all of your sentences with a flourish!~ Understood?~

    God-Tier (shamelessly manipped from John) and Symbol of Know


    ==> Tl;Dr?


    (I might've made up some more stuff just now. It is suddenly Vericanon.)
    Last edited by VeritasUnae; 04-05-2012 at 08:31 PM.

    I also sometimes play Rose on Pesterchum. The bot is dead, long live therapy! | Avatar by JessySketches

  17. #292
    IЖ - ңєямit doomedHermit's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    ==> Become the desert loner.

    You're, uh, now the desert loner, if you want, I guess.


    (( some bonus images that are large ))



    You are Elizabeth Smith, though you refuse to tell anyone your full name. You use the chumhandle doomedHermit and tend to talk єя, шitң д stядиgє иєяvөџs мџмвlє. You are deeply interested in CLASSICAL GREEK LITERATURE and VARIOUS OCCULT ITEMS that you know are all rubbish anyway. You pass the time with intellectual pursuits in ENGINEERING and the applications of VENOM FROM NATIVE FAUNA, which ranks amongst the most deadly on Earth. TRAP-MAKING has always interested you and helped protect your home from predators. The symbol on your hooded shirt is taken from the MAJOR ARCANA of the TAROT, and it represents the HERMIT, a sign you believe epitomises you rather well in both meaning and name-sake.

    You use a complicated 'Trap Modus' as your fetch modus, meaning that trying to retrieve your items is deadly for any and all who aren't as experience in trap-work as you. The strife specibus of your choice is BOOMERANG-KIND, though it can range from the simple curved throwing clubs they were originally meant to be to the stylised returning kind.

    You are currently in the middle of a game of SBURB with two other friends and a third person who is a friend of a friend that you have never spoken to. From your home in an aging bunker in the Simpson Desert, Australia, you were the first player to get your SBURB CLIENT disk active. The son of your supply pilot, who has been your only close-by companion, activated his SERVER disk and you began on your way. With a love of classical Greek literature, your first choice in sprite prototyping was a copy of Homer's Odyssey, a tale of the heroic Odysseus on his journey back home from the Trojan War. Now accompanied by your hoplite-sprite, you race to figure out how to defend yourself from that ominous ball of flaming rock heading straight for your location. The pre-punched alchemy card revealed itself to be a key, and it surprisingly fit into that one locked door you could never open. Jumping inside, you wait out the inevitable destruction of your home in the only safe place available.
    Coming out, you find yourself in The Medium. Imps with armour of bronze and long spears now threaten you. Working your way up to the gate (but not without a fair amount of alchemizing and weapons testing), you depart to the Land of Sand and Darkness, where you now reside.
    Last edited by doomedHermit; 01-13-2012 at 01:47 AM.
    Your chumhandle is doomedHermit and you tend to Єя, мџttєя stядиgєlұ диd дct иєяvөџslұ шңєи ұөџ tұpє.

  18. #293
    Ripcord's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    >Be the self insert.

    VR: Okay.

    ==>



    You are now MATT PARKER. Today is your seventeenth-

    HA: No you fucking dont!!

    ===>




    ...

    (( well that took a month to write but I MET MY DEADLINE. ))








    AT: Where am I?
    >GET BACK IN THE BOX.
    Last edited by Ripcord; 01-29-2012 at 07:10 PM.

  19. #294
    Functionally Illiterate PrussianMoose's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    @Ripcord: Oh my gosh, your kids are cuties.
    I hope those little rascals are going into a roleplay or an adventure of somesort, I'd love to see more of them (and your astoundingly pretty art)!

  20. #295

    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Quote Originally Posted by VeritasUnae View Post
    (I might've made up some more stuff just now. It is suddenly Vericanon.)
    So you're saying you...Verified it?

  21. #296
    Cliff_Racer's Avatar
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    Wink Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    >Be the self insert who ISN'T female.



    pfff, sure thing, brah. Lemme get riiight on that. qB)

    You are now GLEN ELMOTTA.

    Today, the NINTH of JANUARY, is not a date that is special to you. Sure, it's close to your birthday but FUCK THAT you hate your birthday. You share it sometimes with Martin Luther King which is cool but totally takes the attention off it. Which is also cool, because YOU HATE ATTENTION. You'd prefer being left alone in your little spot just drawing, maybe listening to some music or playing a game! Yeah! Take THAT, society!

    Completely unrelated to any of that, you are a CROSSDRESSER. You've only really told this to a couple friends you trust alot alot, because if you were open about this you'd probably be ridiculed. You cannot take RIDICULE that well. You either blush alot and curl into a shame ball or BE REALLY LOUD AND LAUGHY ABOUT IT and beat yourself up inside. Though, that doesn't mean you are a SENSITIVE GUY. You're one of the most APATHETIC people you know, and have a SICK, DRY SENSE OF HUMOR... Which somehow is funny. You don't get it either. Otherwise, you're just really fun and tired alot. You tend to FALL ASLEEP INCONVENIENTLY.

    Your HOUSE is a sweet-ass SPLIT LEVEL place. Medium sized, big enough for FOUR PEOPLE to live comfortably. You also have two DOGS, whom are adorable, energetic little shits. You have one sibling in your direct family, a little brother, whom ANNOYS YOU TO NO END. You love him to DEATH though. You just don't wanna be next to him 24/7, which unfortunately happens ALL THE TIME. Your DAD is a smoker and your MOM is really nice and intelligent. Your DAD works nights often, however, so you don't really see him when you get home from SCHOOL, and your MOM works at the nearby military base until a while after you return.

    Most of your AT-HOME time is on the COMPUTER. You loooove your compy. But sometimes, you play around with a STAFF you made from fallen logs in your teeny-tiny back yard. It's basically just a BO STAFF with some cool engravings you made, you just use it as a walking stick alot when you're tired. You haven't really had another use for it! You tend to keep all your stuff in your MESSENGER BAG, since your FETCH MODUS is an annoying, inconvenient piece of shit. You have to laugh into it. Yeah.

    MOVING ON.

    Your chumhandle is sarcasticEnigma, and you type erratically. Yeah, that's right. Erratically. YOU WANNA FIGHT ABOUT IT? lmao it's ok, joking with yooou! <3

    Your Strife Specibus hasn't been allocated yet!

    Your fetch modus is Giggle. It requires you to laugh into the item's card a sufficient amount to retrieve it. Actual laughter, too, no fake crap.

    TL;DR!
    You're gonna carry that weight.

  22. #297
    Perspective Change. Now. VeritasUnae's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    Quote Originally Posted by Crazy-8 View Post
    So you're saying you...Verified it?
    charles i can't even. that was great.

    I also sometimes play Rose on Pesterchum. The bot is dead, long live therapy! | Avatar by JessySketches

  23. #298
    STILL THE BEST 1973 Lazer Ilitenter's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    >Be the bane of Reno high



    Your name is JACOB HALBERT, journalist former journalist for your school newspaper. SIGH.

    You’ve lived in NEVADA all your life, on a ranch near Reno. You do various odd jobs, helping your UNCLE tend to the BISON and making sure the DEER and the ANTELOPE aren’t always chewing up the place. Well, wait, no, there aren’t any ANTELOPE, they live in Africa. Okay, point is, you do work on a ranch. You don’t get COMPENSATION for this, though. Your UNCLE says the fact that he gives you three square a day and a place to live is payment enough. And you can see where he comes from with that, it’s tough out there sometimes, so you try to do as much good as you can to help keep the place running, as well as help with the HYDROPONIC GARDENS.

    However, RANCHING is not your calling. You are a JOURNALIST at heart. When you were a child you used to look at a lot of the ILLUSTRATED BOOKS your uncle kept shelved in his study, many of which were written by the illustrious DR. HUNTER S. THOMPSON. As you grew older, you read the books, as well as the works of other progressive journalists. TOM WOLFE, NICHOLAS TOMALIN, TRUMAN CAPOTE, all of these folks rank among your heroes. Their off-beat brand of truth and getting to the story have always struck you as better than the typical “Go to place, say what happens, leave” sense. You feel like one of the only people who understands the deep undertones of books like THE ELECTRIC KOOL-AID ACID TEST, and their impact on history. Just because you may be gathering the truth in a roundabout way, people tend to discount these as fake journalism. You feel that if these gained more mainstream exposure, though, people would learn to appreciate their objective-yet-subjective styles.

    This mentality has gotten you into trouble, though. You used to be part of your school’s NEWSPAPER CLUB. Most of the time you would just do puff pieces on upcoming events, which didn’t bother you much. School is boring and doesn’t have much to offer in the way of GROUNDBREAKING STORIES. However, one day you happened to be snooping around in the principle’s files, when you noticed a memo he had on his desk that clearly outlined a GRATUITOUS MISUSE OF SCHOOL LEVY FUNDS. When you tried to submit the story, though, the EDITOR, your English teacher, not only refused to print the story, but kicked you out of the club and gave you a detention for rifling through the principle’s stuff. To your knowledge, nothing has been done to correct these wrongs. It still steams you to this day.

    Besides your journalistic inclement, you do have many interests. You are very knowledgeable in DESERT ZOOLOGY, spending most of your time out in a desert. You have many PETRIFIED DESERT ANIMALS on display in your room, from scorpions to snakes to salamanders. You also follow the JOSSVERSE. You didn’t even know you did until you discovered FIREFLY, BUFFY, and TITAN A.E. were all done by him. Now you try to keep up with every work he does when you get the chance. You also love ANY MUSIC WITH AN ACOUSTIC GUITAR. You wish you could play acoustic guitar, but your uncle says instruments are for losers who will get a job waiting tables. You are not quite sure you can disagree. You are also very fond of HYDROPONIC GARDENING. You think if everyone just got one of those gardens food prices would drop overnight, and everyone might enjoy the fresher food. As well as the many OTHER THINGS that can be grown in those gardens. Like parsley or thyme. But even if you don't grow food, you think people can still BENEFIT from these gardens. By growing flowers and decorative plants, of course.

    Most of the time you are very MELLOW. Gee, there’s a word you don’t hear much any more. It is incredibly difficult to truly rile you up to the point of outright anger. At times you’ll remain in a near catatonic state of CHILLNESS. Many people have never even seen you upset, and those who have hardly noticed. You also show a sense of politeness usually seen by folks in the DEEP SOUTH, very “Yes sir” and “Yes ma’am” until you know they’re comfortable with you. You suppose your UNCLE, being from Alabama, raised you to keep this way, but you don’t think you’d have it in you to just be an outright dick to someone anyway.

    Your chumhandle is sereneGonzology and ‘Sides from the occasional southern colloquialism, you s’pose you don’t type that weird.

    tl;dr
    Last edited by Lazer Ilitenter; 01-22-2012 at 09:44 AM.
    READER BEWARE, YOU'RE IN FOR A SCARE


  24. #299
    chirp chirp motherfucker Never's Avatar
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    Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    > Be the one who isn't a self insert.

    there are lots of those

    > Well, what about you then?

    yay




    Your name is SAGA HARTMAN, and you are extremely fond of the art of VERBAL COMMUNICATION.

    That doesn't mean that you're GOOD AT IT, however. In fact, you're RATHER SHY, not to mention QUIET. But though you are held back by this, you love GIVING ADVICE ON WHAT OTHER PEOPLE SHOULD SAY, especially for SPEECHES. You're planning on eventually becoming the PERSONAL SPEECH WRITER TO THE PRESIDENT, so all the information that you hold should be valuable. And it is, most of the time. There have been a few ISOLATED INCIDENTS where your advice WASN'T VERY GOOD, but that was in the past and you've resolved not to put those words in someone's mouth ever again.

    You currently live in a small town in southern OREGON with your MUM in a small TRAILER PARK near your school, or at least the one you're going to for now. MUM always wanted the best for you, so she will not hesitate to MOVE to find you BETTER SCHOOLING after bad things happen, or if a PRESTIGIOUS ACADEMY is accepting new students. More often than not, you'll PACK UP AND MOVE to wherever the better school is. You've SEEN A LOT this way, and since MUM is a WRITER for a TRAVEL AGENCY, this is also beneficial to her line of work as well.

    There's certainly sad bits to your life too, yes, but with your fairly recently acquired VIDEO-AUDIO HEADSET COMPUTER with Pesterchum's text-to-speech client, Chitterchum, inculded, a lot of OLD FRIENDS from all over the country have found their way back to you, which has made a lot of the sad bits go away. You're getting PRETTY GOOD at programming it as well, and prefer to use the included VOICE RECOGNITION SOFTWARE you've improved upon as opposed to the attachable keyboard when you're not TINKERING WITH CODE or SENDING CAPTCHAS.

    Your favorite place you've been so far was JAPAN. During your last SPRING BREAK, your MUM took you there for your BIRTHDAY and bought you YOUR COMPUTER while she was at it. Your favorite part of the trip was seeing the CHERRY TREES BLOOM, and you bought your favorite shirt at a seasonal store that was probably a TOURIST TRAP, considering how EXPENSIVE it was. You're not OBSESSED with the country, though you like the scenery and still know how to say 'where is the restroom' in Japanese.

    Other than all that information on your life, you are GENERALLY VERY SWEET AND KIND to the point of DISGUSTING PEOPLE WHO CAN'T STAND NICENESS. Note that when you WANT SOMETHING, you TEND TO GET IT thanks to your WAY WITH WORDS, though you usually end up APOLOGIZING for these SHENANIGANS later, whether you are caught or not. You can be EQUALLY AS GENEROUS, however, so you figure you have at least NEUTRAL KARMA. In addition, you have a great desire to PLEASE THE HIGHER UPS, while still APPRECIATING THE SMALL FOLK. Despite all your generosity and niceness, you still can't seem to comprehend that ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS, and can be OVERLY TRUSTING OF MERE APOLOGIES.

    Your FETCH MODUS is currently set to the Voicebox Modus, which requires you to SAY A CODE WORD TO RETRIEVE THE ITEM. The more important to the plot the item is, the longer the word. You're just praying at this point that you don't accidentally captchalogue anything HYPERCRITICAL, lest you wind up with THAT ONE WORD THAT TAKES THREE YEARS TO SAY as a code word.

    Your Strife Specubus is currently set to megaphnKind, which may sound USELESS until you temporarily DEAFEN PEOPLE with the STATIC yours can make.

    Your Chumhandle is audioBarometer and you use voice recognition software so you cannot use punctuation at all which dissapoints you very much because intonation is everything

    If you were to join a Sburb session, which is moderately likely to happen, you would be the Bard of Breathe in The Land of Bricks and Apples (LoBaA), with your consorts being dark cyan Legless Lizards, and your Denizen is Pan.

    TL;DR:


    OOC!Notes: First real Fancharacter, yaaaay~ Also she sounds like Fluttershy, which is very much win IMHO.

  25. #300
    xAngel_Raphaelx's Avatar
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    Cool Re: CHUMROLL 2: Trollslum Won't Stop Drunk-Dialling Me

    ==> Be the stupid blonde bipolar naz* boy who is yo-


    WHAT?!... THAT IZ ZO UNCOOL MAN!

    ...Excuse me! of course i meant..

    ==> Be the cool but funny blonde german boy who loves everyone equally!

    ----
    danke! zatz alot better!

    Your name is Raphael Schmid and you turned 19 years old last year! (19. june 2011)

    Yeah... you are 19 years old...but everyone you meet calls you at least 16 or 15 years old! You actually don't really care about this! You like to look younger than other humans in your age! Also you believe it's because you are a gemini at the zodiac sign, its said that most of them look younger than other humans and also have a bit of elvish looking ears, what's kind of true! That's also one thing to mention, you have a really big obsession for this whole zodiac sign stuff! You think it's really cool but scary at the same time that 95% of the text in the internet about the sign gemini is true and really kind of reflects your behaviors and acting! You are even bipolar and your favorite colours are red, blue, orange, yellow, purple and black. You also find it strange that the planets of the gemini sign are blue and red, because if you look inside your house pretty much everything is in that colour, for example your couch is blue while your bed is red with blue/red pillows,also everytime you drew something since you were a kid you started to make a sketch with both of those colours! pretty strange huh? Oh, well! You actually think it is more cool than scary and so you just continue being your strange but maybe cool self!

    You also have a big interest in comedy and like watching funny videos in youtube or in the tv! Everyone probably thinks you must be really cool in real life but... THAT WOULD BE THE BIGGEST LIE EVER IF YOU AGREE TO IT! actually you are very clumsy and you make a fool out of you alot... you don't want to mention your stupid past at all. It gives you big depression and also headache, that's also the part where your bipolar thing comes in! it gives you alot of headache you are kind of nervous and hyper acting and you just can't stop arguing with yourself in your weird mind. You better don't want to mention the mentalbreakdowns you have too.Even though it seems like you are kind of stupid and crazy in a way, you really proof to be a good person in real life! you like making others laugh and you also try to help as much as you can, but then you bash yourself down way to much and hate yourself for being ''unperfect'' because you also have a ''wanting to be perfect'' complex too. god you are so pathetic.

    Let's just forget about all this and carry one with another thing you want to tell us! It's about paradoxic things! Oh, you really love those things! it amuses you greatly since you were a little kid to look at those ''M.C. Escher'' books! his drawings inspirate you in a way and you think it's interesting how this can work on a paper but not in real life at all! Hehe, you even like to say similiar things like ''The following Sentence is true. <---> The previous Sentence is wrong.''.Even more funny is... you really like fire and flames! but at the same time you think ice is really cool too! You can't really decide between those both options, even though you have a flame parka but not one with ice... but you think its better to wear the fire one because of sozialistic matters. You just don't want to look cold... you are a warmhearted person and you think others should know that!( Though if your bipolarity kicks in you can be really coldhearted to others without noticing it yourself!)

    Like mentioned before you also have a problem to decide if it comes to colours! If you are on the pc you most likely go and look at your avatar and think he is cool and at the next day its the total opposite and you go and change it to a different one! Hell! Sometimes you think you change your avatars and pictures more than you would change your pants!

    Other than all that... you mentioned before you done some sketches!You really love to draw pictures, but it also depends on your mood if you are able to draw at the moment or not. If you are happy you most likely will draw really awesome things! At least that is what your friends tell you, you don't want to preen with it at all and you know there are alot of other good artist out there!

    Oh and also! you have quite a few parkas. you just love those! they are really comfy in your view! Your first one were orange! Haha, you just got a temporary title in real life from some of your friends because of that! maybe you want to guess which?



    OH MY GOD! zey killed Raphael! you baztardz!
    No... they didn't you liar!



    Your chumhandle is twinParadox and you replace ze letterz ''th'' or ''s'' wiz a ''z'' inztead , becauze you have a zharp german voice! you hate uzing zoze --->'<--- zings becauze you sux at englizh!... a bit! oh and you only uze BIG LETTERZ if you are excited or mad! alzo zometimez you juzt randomly zrow in zome german wordz like ''danke'' , ''ja'' or ''nein'' ! =P




    ( edit: i gonna use PURPLE and i changed some things!XD )
    Last edited by xAngel_Raphaelx; 01-17-2012 at 12:43 AM.

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