TROLLSLUM CAFE XXXV: Warning -- Bee Crossing Next 100 Posts

[Captain Whosit]

Previous Title: I Can Cull the Rainbow

Welcome the Trollslum Café!

Our Guiding Principle: We are all fans of Homestuck in general, and of the trolls in particular. We like to make fantrolls, and if we like to make fantrolls, we love to roleplay them. And so, once upon a time, this thread was created as a place to bring new, undeveloped trolls so that players could flesh them out while interacting with other characters. The primary purpose of the Café is to provide a vague social setting in which characters can meet, mingle, and talk. It is a good way to get introduced to other characters that you can then troll on trollian/pesterchum, or get involved with in a more specific RP. It can also be a decent place to hang out.

Below are some rules that I would like you to follow when you are posting in the Café. Please read them carefully, whether you are new or old to the Café!

1: Characters and Setting

The Café is located somewhere on Alternia. Where exactly? Who knows, and it doesn’t really matter. Keep in mind that this place is located on Alternia (the troll homeworld which is populated by the troll young) when you are developing a character for the Café. Aliens, freaks, and mutants will not last long on Alternia! (If I did not make this clear: No humans, freaks, abominations, or crazy mutants!)

2: Joining the Café

How do you join? Just post! There are no pre-requisites and no screening (for better or for worse). Just jump in, find someone who isn’t already in a scene, and start a conversation.

3: Posting in the Café

A few guidelines for how to post here:

*It is generally helpful if you clearly indicate which character you are speaking to if you are initiating a conversation.

*You can quote a previous post to enhance the clarity of your response, but please spoiler images, and do not post quote pyramids. You can be infracted for this.

*Indicate OOC conversation by double paranthesis (()), or double brackets [[]] if you prefer, or by some other method that clearly indicates you are speaking OOC.

*Do not post only OOC chatter. Go to the Trollslum GenChat for that.

4: Joining a Conversation

Before you have your character wander up to someone and start chatting, check to see if the other character is already talking, and to whom. Sometimes two characters are having a light chat and you may be able to get away with approaching them. Other times, they may be having a serious discussion and would not appreciate the intrusion. Like real-life, think carefully before you walk up to someone and interrupt them, and if they ignore you or tell you to go away, respect that!

5: Fights
Fights are going to need a list of rules all its own. This may very well be one of the most important sections, so please read it carefully!

1) Avoid fights whenever possible! If there are any other viable options for your character besides “pull out a weapon,” do that instead! Yes, I’m sure you want to show off how “badass” your character is, but ultimately getting in a fight is just going to make you look silly and probably like kind of a jerk. Yes, you may be thinking that “trolls are violent pricks,” but remember that the primary purpose of the Café is to develop your character, and fights are not the best way to do that. This doesn't mean that you can't play a mean, provocative character, just know your limits!

2) If you must engage in a fight, please contact the other player(s) by PM or your preferred chat client to try and work things out before you both start throwing posts at each other. If you have an end result you are working towards, it is less likely that your fight will completely devolve into a “show them up” contest.

3) Follow proper etiquette! What do I mean? If you do end up in a fight, the way you describe your character acting is what may separate you from a God Moder and someone with class. Here are some dos and don’ts:

”I cut your character’s arm off with my sword.” Very bad! If you do something like this, you are inflicting an injury on another character without giving them a chance to respond or avoid. Basically, you’re an asshole.

“I shoot your character in the face.” Bad. It is worded in such a way that it suggests the blow already landed.

“I aim at your character’s face and fire.” Probably the best you can do. It explains your action and gives the other player an opportunity to dodge the attack, or not, as they wish.

4) Don’t get involved in someone else’s fight! Unless your troll is good friends with one of the participants, it doesn’t make sense for them to get involved in someone else’s battle. On the whole, trolls are not very charitable. Group fights are just a mess and a bad idea.

5) Don’t fight at all if you can help it! Yes, this rule warrants repeating. It is entirely possible to play a mean, jackass character without provoking a fight every time you talk to someone. BE THE BIGGER MAN (OR WOMAN)! If it looks like you’re going to start a fight, back off! Contrary to what you might think, you’ll earn more respect from your peers than if you start trying to beat the other character up.

6: Romance

Trolls have quadrants. Romance is gonna happen. Now, it’s not my place to tell you how to live your love (or hate) lives. However, I ask that you all keep things clean. If your characters are going to go beyond snuggling and smooching, take it to PMs, an IRC, or a private chat. I’m trying to run a respectable establishment, here.

7: Problems

Gotta face facts: Problems are gonna crop up. Maybe it’s another player, maybe a fight broke out and someone is god moding, maybe someone decided that it would be awesome to bring in the rainbow-drinker rainbowblood who’s gonna be the next empress and who is secretly the lover of all the canon trolls. All of them. If you have a problem with someone, contact them. Privately and politely. It is not good to make a scene in public. If you are particularly adverse to conflict, you can contact me and I’ll see what I can do.

Likewise, if I see something I think is a problem, I will PM you and try to straighten things out to everyone’s benefit. Note that I will ask you to withdraw or revise a character if I think they will remain problematic as they are. I want everyone to have fun, but I also believe that the fun of the many outweighs the fun of the few.

8: Rules Change

I reserve the right to change or revise these rules at any time with or without notification. So remember to check back occasionally to refresh yourself!

9: Fun

Have fun!

Or else!

Also, be polite, kids!

FAQ
(Okay, I don't really get many questions, but this seemed like the best label for this section.)

Q: What if I want to roleplay something that isn't allowed in the Cafe?

A: There are several other mediums for roleplaying: Instant messengers, including the fan-made Pesterchum client; typewith.me or sync.in collaborative documents; private messages. In theory, after characters meet in the Cafe, they can continue roleplaying elsewhere.

Archives

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The First
The Second
The Third
The Fourth
The Fifth
The Sixth
The Seventh
The Eighth
The Ninth
The Tenth
The Eleventh
The Twelfth
The Thirteenth
The Fourteenth
The Fifteenth
The Sixteenth
The Seventeenth
The Eighteenth
The Nineteenth
The Twentieth!
The Twenty-first
The Twenty-second
The Twenty-third
The Twenty-fourth
The Twenty-fifth
The Twenty-sixth
The Twenty-seventh
The Twenty-eighth
The Twenty-ninth
The Thirtieth
The Thirty-first
The Thirty-second
The Thirty-third
The Thirty-fourth

The Precursor

[inexplicableSigns]

Kitiba hums softly and takes a sip of the soda water as it turns bright blue and bubbly.
"/| hmmmm |\"
The window nearest Merope suddenly darkens.
And then it opens.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES

[Pootporri]

would you say you would kill them if given a second chance? curiosity, is all.

Nutela idly taps her fingers on the table.

[Katrika]

Merope screams, picks up a chair, and starts SMASHING BEES.

[MostlyHarmless]

"(M)/ that depends, ma'am \(M)
(M)/ whats with your blood color \(M)
(M)/ though it is rather lovely, i should mention \(M)"

iT beTTer be lovely. i piCked This Color oUT myself.

[Cliff_Racer]

" {" nah. one's my k"smes"s and the other " stopped car"ng about? " get over sh"t easy " guess: "

He shrugs.

He also can't really tell it's Merope who is screaming, since he can't really tell screams apart and didn't see her come in?

[Bomber]

My luzzzuzzz? He'zzz *Buzz* a Herculezzz Beetle *Buzz* the zzzize of *Buzz* a large cow.
Explains Bughar's horns a little.
Back when I *Buzz* wazzz a wiggler, *Buzz* I uzzzed to *Buzz* wrezzztle him.
SUDDENLY, BEES.
GET YOUR NET, YOU ARE THE BUG CATCHER.
You begin flailing your net around in an attempt to catch the bees.

[scintillatingMoniker]

Narwid was a little bored. This conversation wasn't at all interesting.
Guess hate just isn't the same unless it's mutual and currently happening. He takes this chance to think of some insults for

iT beTTer be lovely. i piCked This Color oUT myself.

waitwhat

[inexplicableSigns]

Kitiba looks over at Merope, confused.
Wait.
Is she smashing.
Bees.
Her bees?
HER LUSUS?
Kitiba grabs a a small club-looking thingit from her strife specibus and launches herself at Merope.
"/| THTOP THAT YOU MONTHTER! |\"

~~~~


"(M)/ huh, so i'm not the only one \(M)"
Kheleb chuckles and holds a hand out to shake, not that he expects it to be taken.
"(M)/ i get sick really easily, so the bandages help filter the air \(M)
(M)/ better than coughing my lungs out \(M)"

[Dead Zed]

Ariam begins laughing at the flailing, holding his sides.
"H4 H4 H4! You look r1d1culous!"

[Katrika]

Merope is too freaked to notice that Kitiba is a seadweller, or care.

RUN, LADY, THEY'RE GUNNA EAT YOU!

She slaps at a few more bees.

[Bomber]

==>Continue flailing.
FLAILFLAILCATCHBEESFLAILFALIL.
*Trip*
Enough of that. You decide to give up on the bees and hopefully ignore them.

[Pootporri]

i see. kismesis, eh? i've yet to get one of those, which is entirely surprising. i guess it's not easy filling a quadrant with people who are unresponsive. eh, whatever.

She waves a dismissing hand.

i'm sorry, i can't stop myself from wondering. are you still sure you don't want to tell me your blood color?

SMILESMILESMILESMILESMILESMILE.

[Dead Zed]

Ariam falls onto the floor, still laughing. Rolling right into a random highblood.

[Captain Whosit]

Altaia finally finds her modus card: It was under a booth. Looks like it's still intact, too. So, that done, she leaves.

[Cliff_Racer]

" {" yes, " am sure, because " don't go around spout"ng my blood color w"lly-n"lly. "{ you're gonna keep ask"ng, don't: "

[Suds McFuddle]

Zandig's still here, smiling, admiring his new legs, and idling like a boss.

[MostlyHarmless]

Adeine shakes his hand. Something about his handshake felt a little off... She couldn't quite put her finger on it.



ThAT so? i jUsT ThoUGhT ThAT yoU were CoverinG A ziT or someThinG.

[Pootporri]

Nutela rolls her visible eye.



are you suuuuuuure? i mean, i'm a rather trustworthy person if it didn't occur to you beforehand. i don't honestly see the problem!

The daggers in her voice are getting a bit evident, but her smile remains persistent. She nonchalantly edges a liiiittle closer to Quoute.

[inexplicableSigns]

"/| THEY ARE NOT GOING TO EAT ME |\
/| YOU ARE BEATING MY LUTHUTH TO DEATH |\
/| WHY ARE YOU BEATING MY LUTHUTH TO DEATH |\
/| WHAT THE FUCK ITH WRONG WITH YOU |\"
Kitiba is swinging the pestle at Merope, trying to knock her out.

The bees show remarkable ability to avoid being caught, but they aren't trying to disturb anyone. They are mostly just swarming around Merope and Kitiba now.

~~~


"(M)/ hehehe, nah \(M)
(M)/ its functional, not exactly elegant \(M)
(M)/ why did you change your blood \(M)"

[Cliff_Racer]

" {" yes, " am sure. you have {"ns on your {ace, " don't th"nk " can trust you as {ar as " can throw you: "

Quoute is unfortunately rather oblivious right now.

[Strider]

Horrin is still here, observing everything going on in the cafe. He waves hi to some random troll (Zandig) but otherwise keeps to himself.

Ventus is also still here. He waves hello to Merope, but doesn't approach her at the moment. She looks like she might be busy with something.

[Sandvich King]

While Catlin was looking away, Gatior got up and said he had to leave.
She turns around and tries to say goodbye but he is already on his way out.

Guess it's time to look for someone else to talk to... Oh hey. What's with the bees over there?

[Katrika]

THEY'RE GONNA EA-

Merope is knocked out. Welp.

[Pootporri]

oh really? is that so? too bad, my curiosity is a bit too overwhelming for me to continue this charade any longer.

Nutela grabs Quoute's shoulder, aaaaaaaaaandd....

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Well, that's an awfully good way to tell what someone's blood color is.