Sburbia [TEXT ADVENTURE]

[LordHyper]

SBURBIA

Special notes and stuff you may ask:

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-This is an AU adventure due to the possibility of Gamzee becoming friendly and.. some other things which I won't reveal since it would spoil some stuff.

-Many of the updates are short and simple. Just imagine there's a picture above it, because that's what I imagine when I see the small text. Don't have an imagination? Too bad.

-I am bad at spriting ad just making drawings on the computer in general. Do not expect this to become a normal adventure anytime soon.

Expository back-story shit:

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What is Sburbia?

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Sburbia is an adventure taking place in the world created by the kid's session. What happened to the kids and trolls after that? They decide to work together to help the unucky idiots playing Sburb, in order to create more successful sessions and more universes. Besides, after they screwed up so badly, they want to keep other sessions from making the same mistakes as them.

Using the veil as headquarters, they set up a website called Sburbia. The website contains hints and help on the more frustrating mechanics of Sburb (aka, everything about Sburb in general) and they offer assistance via Pesterchum. When they're not adding content to the site, they're trying to stop the sale of Sburb across all universes that aren't currently dead. This usually succeeds. Telling people that the game's capable of destroying planets help.

But something got through their watchful monitors. A local contest in their created world, called Earthternia (see History for details) went unnoticed. This contest offering 10 copies of the game to one lucky kid and their friends. Someone managed to win.

He and their friends don't know how much shit they fell into.

History of Earthternia:

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Year 0 - Universe created. Early lifeforms show up.

Year 413 - Human lifeforms are born.

Year 612 - Human civilizations begin coming together. Humans discover magic.

Year 1056 - The ship that left the kid's version of Prospit before it was destroyed finally arrived (for the people inside, it was a year or so; blame weird time shit). People assume they're aliens and begin flipping the fuck out. They get over it eventually.

Year 1057 - Sburbia contacts the exiles. The exiles suggest to name the planet Earthternia to scientists and historians in memory of Alternia and Earth. They said, "Why not?" and made it happen.

Year 1058 - Exiles introduce technology to humans. Magical humans however do not accept technology. Most however embrace it today.

Year 1059 - Humans begin making computers.

Year 1069 - Video games are invented. Sburbia begins their Earthternia campaign against Sburb (by this time a few months passed for the humans and trolls; weird time shit again).

Year 1079 - Sburb enters it's beta stages. Exiles help them prevent the spreading of beta copies. A contest in a small city goes unnoticed and ten people get their hands on beta copies as prizes. Sburbia e-mails them, trying to convince them not to play Sburb. They failed.

History in Veil:

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Day 1 (since winning Sburb) - Bec Noir is tamed by Jade. Kids and trolls finally create new universe. Gamzee suddenly disappears.

Day 2 - They stay behind in the veil, under the logic that Sburb may strike new world, like what happened to Alternia and Earth.

Day 6 - After four days of discussion, everyone decides not to go to new universe. However, they decide to set something up to help future Sburb players.

Day 14 - Rose completes her GameFAQs walkthrough, only to discover that the Internet has been destroyed. She rages for several days.

Day 15 - Sollux creates a website that can be accessed anywhere. How? Well, Terezi somehow managed to connect with Doc Scratch despite the fact he did not have a computer or a Trollan account, so why not?

Day 37 - A replacement for Facebook is created to be accessed by Consorts, Prospitians, and Dersites just for shits and giggles. They contact Prospitian and Dersite settlers heading to new universe, as most of them are still too scared to set foot on Earth.

Day 40 - Rose remakes her walkthrough, in the form of Sburbia, thanks to the help of Sollux. Everyone starts to contribute to Sburbia. Eventually, Sburbia could be accessed by people of the new world.

Day 68 - Gamzee creates an account on Sburbia. Everyone is horrified and flips the fuck out. Sollux can't even boot him out. Everyone still has no idea where he is though.

Day 74 - News reaches that Sburb is being made in new universe. They collaborate with carapaces to prevent game from being sold.

Day 80 - Efforts go to naught when 10 kids get Sburb Beta copies. They attempt to convince them not to play, but they fail.

Day 81 - And so shit begins to happen...

Characters:

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Kids:

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Kristopher Ravinn - regularTeen - ??? of ???
Description: Your average teenage boy. He has a great interest in Death Note. In fact, it's because of his fandom towards Death Note that his STRIFE SPECIBUS and FETCH MODUS is heavily influenced by it. He's generally friendly towards the others.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Penkind
FETCH MODUS: Notebook - Write down name of object to take it out. It should be noted that the notebook fetch modus is extremely specific.
QUIRK: Capitalizes "i" all the tIme.
Guardian: MOM

Bill Roberts - eccentricGourmand - ??? of ???
Description: A huge eater, due to being fed by a FATHERCHEF all his life. He easily gets hungry, but he can suck it up.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Fork-kind - This applies to tridents.
FETCH MODUS: Bread - Upon taking something, it gets baked into a bread roll. He must eat the bread roll to release the card and item.
QUIRK: Types food-related words in ALL CAPS.
Guardian: FATHERCHEF

Nikola Angier - lastEmperor - ??? of ???
Description: An orphan living at the GREATER GOOD. He has been sick of an unknown disease since birth and is always nervous. Alfred always bullies him for some reason, but both have forgotten why.
STRIFE SPECIBUS - Scepter-kind
FETCH MODUS: Virus - All items he gets are infected by a virus. He must either use the item or drop it or it will eventually be eaten up.
QUIRK: He always stammers and gets into occasional coughing fits.
Guardian: NONE

Alfred McCullough - fightingForce - ??? of ???
Description: Another orphan. He has always been bullying Nikola, but he has long forgotten why. He attempts to act cool, but usually fails at doing so. He is also somewhat tough.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Polekind
FETCH MODUS: Whack - Any items he takes out will fly at the nearest enemy.
QUIRK: Uses cool words and only uses hell as a curse word.
Guardian: None

Julia Borden - kindlyAngel - ??? of ???
Description: Daughter of the orphanage's CARETAKER, and she strives to be like her one day. She always tries to stop Alfred's attempts to bully Nikola.
STRIFE SPECIBUS - Glove-kind
FETCH MODUS: Joy - Can only take out the item that can do the most good in the current situation.
QUIRK: Types in CAPS when she gets angry.
Guardian: CARETAKER

Celia Whitebird - arcticFrost - ??? of ???
Description: A girl who lives in the arctic with her ESKIBRO. She's always full of ideas. She knows basic fire magic, but is not very good at handling it. Her dream-self was a former adviser to the Black Queen.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Match-kind - Needs to create a spark to trigger fire magic.
FETCH MODUS: Imagination - Needs to imagine the item to bring it out.
QUIRK: Triples "r"s.
Guardian: ESKIBRO

Conrada Viedt - clownWorshiper - ??? of ???
Description: When she was young, her father died in a car crash. A man named Gamzee began e-mailing her, teaching her how to be self-sufficient, as well as the subjugglator ideals. It's still unknown why he does this.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Club-kind
FETCH MODUS: Kill - Has to kill something in order to get something out.
Quirk: Uses terminology Gamzee's familiar with and goes HA HA HONK HA HA when laughing.
Guardian: GAMZEE

carapaceExpress
Description: A young Dersite who has a fondness for trains. He also enjoys rumors and mysteries, and tries to find the answer behind things. The only thing he accomplishes is make more questions however.
Guardian: CARADAD

Flora Evarella - magicalForest - ??? of ???
Description: A girl living in the forest. She and her SISTER are mages, and are always combating in contests of magic.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Staff-kind
FETCH MODUS: Drain - The more items she carries, the lesser stronger her magic.
Quirk: Triple punctuation marks and types in caps when her sister is concerned.
Guardian: SISTER

Caspian Miraz - distantMana - ??? of ???
Description: Having always lived with a pro-magic father all his life, he has no idea how technology works. He has a pet owl called Hedgewig.
STRIFE SPECIBUS: Book-kind - Different magic books tend to have different spells.
FETCH MODUS: Book - Must flip to the page the item is cataloged in.
Quirk: Switches m with n and vice-versa.
Guardian: WIZDAD

Guardians:

Carapaces:

The Felt:

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Felt Crocodile
Consort: Crocodile
Description: A crocodile that aspires to be like Doc Scratch. Has basic teleportation powers and speaks formally.

Green Spider
Consort: Spider
Description: A scheming spider. Whenever someone is presented with a choice, she can see the timeline that occurs with the other choice. Always giggling.

Guardian Angel
Consort: Angel (Alternian)
Description: An angel that usually speaks casually but goes into random rages. Can use flame powers.

Lord Lizard
Consort: Lizard
Description: A lizard that hisses on 's'. He can see where people recently teleported from and to.

Englishhat
Consort: Salamander
Description: The leader of the Consort division of The Felt. He was formerly from the Land of Wind and Shade but he gets recruited into the ranks of the Felt after he gets exiled for wearing a crumpled hat. He has the same ability to hijack narration like Doc Scratch. He can also randomly teleport people to him.

Well, now that we've gotten that out of the way, let's get on with the show.

Act 1: Shit Just Got Real

You are a young man in his room. Recently you had won a contest for beta copies of a game called Sburb. You're not sure what it is to be honest. You're pretty sure you've never heard of it before. Nevertheless, as soon as the rest of your friends get the copies, you're going to start playing.

Your room is pretty average for a young man. A simple bed, some posters displaying your interests (which is anime, mainly Death Note), a computer, a tv, and a window with a nice view of the neighborhood. What a nice calm day.

You turn your attention to the computer. You are currently logged on as RegularTeen, which you use as a username for everything. When you type, you usually capitalize "i" no matter what. "[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]It's sort of lIke thIs[/COLOR]."

A pop-up comes up, showing that you have four new e-mails.

...Oh shit wait. Before continuing the plot, let's waste time to try and remember your name.

==>

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I hope this adventure turns out okay. I'm still thinking up of some other characters, but I got the basic concepts down for all of them. By the way, does anyone here know how to color text? It would be appreciated.

EDIT: I got it down.

[Roselalonde]

> Jordan Von Strangle.

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Sneaky is suburbia. Aaaaaaha.

Oh and to Color text just highlight it then click on the arrow next to the letter... I would take a screenshot but I'm leaving to go someplace.

[LordHyper]

>Jordon Von Strangle

...No. That is most definitely not your name. You'd be insulted to carry it. Several years ago, fairies went to war with centaurs, with the burly Jordon Von Strangle leading them. No centaur was safe from his carnage.

You're pretty sure that happened.

>

[crash826]

> Kristopher Ravinn (you say it's pronounced RAY-venn but everyone says it as rah-VIN

[LordHyper]

>Kristopher Ravinn

...Okay, that works. You're KRISTOPHER RAVINN, but you prefer to just be called CHRIS. Let's see, what else about you...

Ah, that's right. You're FETCH MODUS is NOTEBOOK. You can't pull out your objects at will, but you must write down the name of the object in the attached SYLLADEX NOTEBOOK to take it out. Sort of like Death Note. You feel like Light Yagami, and you try your best to not write in a convoluted way or eat potato chips in an epic way while you take items out. Your STRIFE SPECIBUS is PENKIND, which allows you to wield pens. You used this STRIFE SPECIBUS during your school year, but it's Summer now, and you still haven't figured out how to change your specibus. I guess you could stab people with pens? Whatever.

You check out the four e-mails.

INBOX:

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*DON'T DO IT IDIOT - sburbia.carcinoGeneticist@skaia.net
*play this and die - sburbia.turntechGodhead@skaia.net
*don't listen, THESE GUYS ARE MOTHERFUCKERS - sburbia.subjuggulatorNation@skaia.net
*Pesterchum, Free Download! - sburbia.GardenGnostic@skaia.net

Oh god, these guys again.

>

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Check the third email first.

[Roselalonde]

>Check the third email first.

> But pesterchum might be some kind of porn thing.

[FIDUSPAWN]

No, that the fourth email that you are thinking about.

[intangibleInsight]

>Check the second one, his rants can be funny at least.

[LordHyper]

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Still don't know how to color text. I'll fix this post as soon as I find out.

>Check second one

You might as well see what these guys have to rant about this time. You open up the second e-mail first, as you can sense coolness coming from it.

E-MAIL LOG:

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dude do not play sburb its retarded and not ironic
its going to destroy your planet dude and that aint cool or ironic
just retarded man
i would kick off some sweet beats but this aint the time for it

Even though he's implying you're retarded, you can't get over how cool this guy is.

>Check the third e-mail first

You already checked the second e-mail first, but okay.

E-MAIL LOG

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don't listen to these motherfuckers
THEY'RE MOTHERFUCKING SPAMMERS
just go with the flow
LET THE MIRACLES OF SBURB TAKE YOU TO NEW MOTHERFUCKING HEIGHTS
honk ;0)

Huh? Isn't this guy along with the others? Ah well. Maybe it's a clever advertising campaign by the creators of Sburb?

>But Pesterchum might be some kind of porn thing

Unlikely. Your MOTHER put a parental lock of some sort on your computer. How that's possible, you're not sure.

Let's check it out anyway.

E-MAIL LOG:

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please don't play it, please. but if you're not going to listen to us, download this! it's a chat application that let's us talk to you and you're friends! if you go through with this, don't worry, we have your backs!

PS. we sent this e-mail to the rest of your friends!

You find a download attached to the e-mail and you start downloading. You guess you should take a look at the last e-mail while you're at it.

E-MAIL LOG:

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DON'T DO IT FOR THE LOVE OF SHIT! YOU'VE GOT TO BE A GODDAMN RETARD IT YOU'RE ACTUALLY GOING TO DO THIS! I SWEAR, IF A MONSTER ATTACKS US BECAUSE OF YOUR INCOMPETENCE AND NINCOMPOOPISM, I'M GOING TO BEAT THE EVER LIVING SHIT OUT OF YOU WITH MY BARE HANDS, JEGUS SO HELP ME!

...Well. That was... colorful.

Your download has already installed. You open up Pesterchum. It looks like any chat application, however, there's an additional tab, labeled Sburb.

You look at the chumroll, which is some sort of friends list. So far, only one of your friends, magicalForest, has installed Pesterchum and is currently online.

==>

[intangibleInsight]

>Ask MF if the same guys have been bugging her too.

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Emailed your other eight friends to installed Pesterchum too.

[LordHyper]

>Emailed your other eight friends to installed Pesterchum too

You go on your email account to see your friend's list.

FRIENDS:

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magicalForest
eccentricGourmand
carapaceExpress
clownWorshiper
lastEmperor
kindlyAngel
fightingForce

Your other two friends, arcticFrost and distantMana, live in the arctic and have a pro-magic parent respectively. AF's internet is horrible, and thus does not bother with e-mail and just sends letters. DM's father dislikes technology, so he has to send you mail... by owl. His father is a crazy jerkass. However, he's managed to secure a computer for the game. You just hope his dad doesn't catch him.

Everyone seems to be in the process of downloading, with the exception of magicalForest.

>Ask MF if the same guys have been bugging her too.

You decide to talk to MF to pass the time.

PESTERLOG:

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RT: Hey MF.
MF: Oh,,, hello Chris!!!
RT: DId you just get e-maIled by some people from a sIte called sburbIa?
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Yes...[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Funny thing,,, one of them was claiming to be something called a '''rainbow drinker''' and another gave the same warning we were given for days,,, but he started sobbing about a girl named Vriska halfway through.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: I thInk I got a coolkId, a clown, and a troll.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Oh yeah,,, the ragey guy...[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: So, how's Pesterchum workIng for you?[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Pretty good... Wondering what the Sburb tab does though...[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: WonderIng the same thIng.
RT: How's the others? DId they get theIr Sburb copIes yet?[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: All accounted for... DM'''s the last one getting a copy.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: Great! So, we should all start In a few hours.
RT: I ImagIne that DM's tryIng to fIgure out how to use the mouse.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Ha ha
MF: Wait......... how will AF and DM get Pesterchum???[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: I'm sure they'll fIgure It out.
RT: See you In a bIt.[/COLOR]
[COLOR="rgb(46, 139, 87)"]MF: Bye...

[/COLOR]

You hear some fluttering outside. You look out your window. Ah, it seems like DM's owl has landed in your backyard.

==>

[Roselalonde]

Sorry for the big images, but...
How to color text:

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[intangibleInsight]

>Open the window to let the owl in.

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Read letter from DM's owl.

[LordHyper]

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@Roselalonde Thanks. Remembering the colors will be a bitch though.

>Open the window to let the owl in

You open the window up and the owl comes flying in, landing on the windowsill.

>Read letter from DM's owl.

You try to take the letter, but the owl angrily pecks you! It seems that the owl wants some food. Oh my god.

Your MOTHER has an irrational fear of birds, to the point that she stays away from all Kentucky Fried Chicken restaurants. You're childhood has been scarred for lack of chicken and buffalo meat.

So anyway, your MOTHER always flips her shit when she sees the owl. Better not let her catch you getting food for it, or you'll have to STRIFE with her.

You head out into the HALLWAY. The ceiling is rather low, as an anti-bird tactic, and all windows except yours has a bird-zapper attached to it. Yes, those exist. The KITCHEN is downstairs.

==>

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Go to the kitchen as fast as you can without making a sound.

[LordHyper]

>Go to the kitchen as fast as you can without making a sound

You creep down the stairs, trying not to make a sound.

It was an overwhelming failure.

You proceed to trip and fall down the stairs. You wish there was someone to warn you about the blasted stairs, but there wasn't.

You land at the bottom of the stairs, making a huge noise. But turns out, there was no point in these shennagins, as your mom left to get groceries.

What a fun waste of time.

==>

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Now get some food from the fridge that right for a owl to eat.

[LordHyper]

>Now get some food from the fridge that right for a owl to eat

You head over to the fridge. This seems easier than you tho-

The front door is suddenly heard opening and closing. In comes your MOTHER, toting grocery bags. Your MOTHER looks like anyone's mom, however, she wears a hat to ward off birds if one ever tried to land on her head.


RT: Oh! HI mom.
MOTHER: Hello son. Can you help me put the grocer-
*MOTHER smells the air and cringes*
MOTHER: Son... Di-Did you.... Bring a bird inside the house!?
[COLOR="rgb(160, 82, 45)"]RT: Oh shIt.[/COLOR]
MOTHER: BIRDS! GET THEM AWAY! GET IT OUT GET IT OUT GET IT OUT...

Your MOTHER proceeds to flip the fuck out. But your MOTHER is prepared for that. Everytime she goes to the store, she gets Sopor-Relaxant, a disgusting green drink that relaxes anyone's nerves. Now then, to cure your MOTHER...

STRIFE!

>GIVE
>GET
>GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Used Penkind to protect yourself while you tried to cure your Mother.

[LordHyper]

>GIVE

You're going to give the medicine and maybe the gift of pain if your MOTHER suddenly attacks. You take out a BLUE PEN and slowly advance...

But alas, your MOTHER smacks your BLUE PEN and the MEDICINE out of your hands! you are now without weapon and plot coupon!

>GET
>GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE

[FIDUSPAWN]

>Flee since it the only option left that has a chance in succeeding.

[LordHyper]

>GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE

You do just that. You quickly run upstairs and lock the door to the room. The owl looks at you hopefully, but becomes disappointed after finding out you brought no snacks. You glance over to the computer. It seems that clownWorshiper has installed Pesterchum, but you have other things to do.

You've played many games and watched much anime up here. There has to be some sort of snacks left behind.

Meanwhile, some other shit is happening.

---

You are now eccentricGourmand.

You live in an apartment situated above your FATHERCHEF'S restaurant. Around your room there are plates that once held food. Ever since you were a little boy, your FATHERCHEF always leaves you a plate of delectable food for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even leaves you meals for a midnight snack.

Your STRIFE SPECIBUS is FORK-KIND. It allows you to wield different types of forks. It also allows you to equip tridents, as they're essentially giant forks. You also have a KNIFE-KIND hidden in your STRIFE PORTFOLIO, which is more practical, but boring.

You own a BREAD SYLLADEX. Every time you capatcholouge an object, it gets baked into a bread roll, and you must eat the bread roll to release the item. It's the ideal sylladex for any explorer without food, and is probably the best damn sylladex ever.

As we know, you are [COLOR="rgb(245, 222, 179)"]eccentricGourmand[/COLOR]. When you talk, you type any food related object in all caps, and you're always somewhat positive. "[COLOR="rgb(245, 222, 179)"]You sometimes eat FRUIT when you're typing you know[/COLOR]!"

What's your name again?

==>