SBURB Patch Notes II: The Code is Mightier than the Sword

[orngjce223]

or, SBURB Patch Notes II: An Admin's Guide to Multidimensional Love Shit

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Welcome to Skaianet Laboratories, home of the award-winning best-in-class unique unusual hijinks of the developers who patch Sburb.

Wait, no, not the kind of developers you're used to. More like... oh, let's say Troubleshooters? Experience in Sburb is technically optional, but highly recommended, since there is physical combat involved. For our Admins, especially; since Admins are required to do all the legwork in regards to the largest villains and greatest plotlines that Skaianet sees on a regular basis.

Thread 1 Villain: Itchy [status: deceased]

Okay, so the first running joke was basically that itchy was creating a load of Alt accounts and using them to mess with the game, right?

My idea was that he was doing that from an inside position, in other words he managed to get into the actual offices themselves way before he started making the Alt accounts and bogus edits. He probably vibrated through the furthest ring or something ridiculous like that.

However, it was gigersLich that first worked it out that Itchy was the one manufacturing the glitches we ended up fighting. I like to think Itchy was the one who created some of the more drastic problems that had to be patched, like the ones that resulted in the black queen prototyping that kept giving birth.

If anything, I think it's most likely that Itchy created the Omnikid on purpose, like DD creating bec, and that's how gigersLich found out; through finding out as much as he could about the Omnikid. Of course, he didn't know that the Omnikid would end up fighting against him.

That last bit's probably playing god a bit, though, if Aline was the one that came up with the omnikid. Was she/he?

Thread 2 Villain: God-tier Ultimate Grey King of Skaianet [discussion TBA]

Post 2 of this thread is the Skaianet Employee Directory.

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Introduction to the Skaianet Employee Handbook, ver. 3.19

by Mobius Trip

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...Last in our survey of the planets of our typical session is Skaia, a planet made of pure fused creativity. It is why we call ourselves Skaianet, in the hopes that we will be able to find the solutions to all dilemmas that we come across. It has clouds scuttling over its surface, clouds with the past and future inscribed upon them. In the center of Skaia is a great battlefield, where the chess-pieces fight in their eternal stalemate until the Prototypings tip the balance just barely in favor of Derse. Rivers run through that battlefield, rivers of not water but liquid light, reflective of Skaia's nature of infinite potential.

Creativity is a liquid, though, too: one must ensure one does not run dry. Keep it in a bottle, with a stopper, perhaps. Dip your pen in it, and write neatly, not hastily, upon the parchment that is history, so that others may know who we are and what we do.

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These are some things I learned from the clouds of Skaia.

The frogs are paramount. Not just important; they are critical. Let them arise and they will save you, for they are the essence of all things. In a matter of speaking, I could even assert that they are more real than you are...

Frogspawn is created in great numbers, yet only a few of the embryos, the tadpoles, grow to maturity. So too is it with species, and children, and universes, too; you cannot let all of them succeed. Without the steadying hand of natural selection, where would we be?

Random walks need someone to guide them. That someone, in the case of universes, is us. Must be us, for we are the only ones with the power who are willing to take up the cause. We have the might of the multiverse within our fingers, the greatest powers of Space in our circuits, the most exalted powers of Time in our minds.

Others with this power...

...I have seen them. They will be children, maybe thirteen years old. On the cusp of puberty, only just - but possessing wisdom and intelligence far beyond their years. They will have survived their parents; they will have learned the lessons that I, through Skaia, have taught them. They will be worthy to receive the Ultimate Reward...

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The Prospit and Derse dreamers are alike in their mishandling of the properties of memory, more than either would suspect. The Prospitian dreamer prefers to forget rather than forgive. He yearns for the blissful carelessness of childhood. The chief error of this type is that he remains willfully ignorant; his trust is because of a flat denial of the blackness in the heart of all. It is only when his hands are burnt that he knows they should not have been offered.

The Derse dreamer, by contrast, can neither forget nor forgive. She remembers every unfavorable twist of fate, every slight dealt her by another, and this turns her into a cynic who survives by distrust alone. It is on this planet you will find paranoia and nihilism, distrust born of the denial of goodness. One who dreams of Derse is unapproachable and unfriendly, then assumes that how she is treated is representative of how the rest of humanity treats each other.

Interestingly, sometimes a Prospit child will find one who dreams of Derse, they will befriend each other, and this friendship will strengthen both of them. It is for this very reason that a Session draws from both planets, balancing the number of dreamers on each. The attainment of god tier, before irregularities intervened, was intended to mark this union's perfection of the imperfect mind of each child. Skaia, insofar as it can be said to have an intent of its own, frequently bends fate to encourage the players toward this ideal - although, often enough, not via the conventional means.

And what is this ideal? The adult's worldview should forgive yet not forget; understand and encourage others. He or she should be self-sufficient but know when to ask for help. He or she encourages those who have not yet learned towards responsibility, kindness, caution, and the ability to make human connections. (Or the equivalent for whatever other species.) Preparedness as well as honesty. Both trust and skepticism. This is one of the great paradoxes of paradox space.

In that regard, 413 and 612, the famously renegade sessions, may themselves be recognized for their adherence to this pattern. The children of 413 are innocent compared to their counterparts in 612. Though there are irregularities in the moon-sorting of 612 that decrease the value of a strict analogical comparison, the idea holds.

The world of 413 is inherently innocent: the children, humans, grow up in a world where one of the main influences on their society is the idea of turning the other cheek, paying kindness even unto evil, nonviolence. The troll children of 612 live in an inherently fearful society: their race was dogged by the Handmaid until the entire culture was impregnated with brutality and cynicism, for the Handmaid instilled fear whenever they showed a risk of being kind to one another. And yet 413 and 612 are intertwined, and as time loops in on itself like a pretzel, each race teaches the other.

Thus is a beautiful expression of Skaia's will.

Thus is the real meaning of the game: growing children as well as universes.

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The Ten Tenets of Universal Morality

1. Each individual has the right to do whatever they wish, provided this wish does not infringe on the rights of any other individual, living sentient being, or property of the aforementioned. In other words, the right to swing your arm in a punch ends at the other man's nose. Do not interfere with others' right to do harmless things; only interfere when they wish to infringe.

2. Value your children and raise them well. The gift of life is the hardest burden that all must bear, and yet it is more important than all else. Children thrive most on their parents' love, respect, and gentle urgings to become all they can become...

3. Respond to all that comes to you with a fair weighing of the situation. Do not rely solely on emotion for your decisions...

4. Conversely, do not discount the importance of the emotions of those you interact with. Harsh words encourage others to treat you unfairly, and small acts of kindness may be repaid a hundredfold...

5. Trust in others, and return the trust that is placed in you. Love others, and return the love that is placed in you. Why? It is because love, of all its forms, cannot be measured, but has effects far beyond what any original intention may have specified. Stay with those you truly care about and all other things will fall into [unreadable]. It will take time, but eventually, the bonds from kin to kin will grow strong enough to hold life.

6. Do not be afraid to do what is important to you, what is right, what is good. Staying in place as the world revolves around someone else, wishing for change without creating it yourself, is a poor way to live...

7. Cultivate the mind, for quickness, perceptiveness, and memory are virtues. A sentient mind is no good if it does not know what it wishes. Reflection, self-modification, is an important quality in programming languages; so too must the mind function...

[orngjce223]

Previous thread: http://www.mspaforums.com/showthread...RB-patch-notes

The Skaianet Employee Directory is located at http://swiki.wikkii.com/wiki/Category:People. The rest of the wiki may be used for documentation purposes if we grow larger, but for now, this is the only piece that we're using.

The Skaianet IRC is located at irc://irc.skaia.net/#patchnotes (OOC) and irc://irc.skaia.net/#patchers (IC). Alternate access (no IRC client required) is located at http://mibbit.com/?channel=%23patchn...=irc.skaia.net.

A temporary pad suitable for working out extensive posts is located at http://piratepad.net/patchnotes.

A TVTropes page is located at http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.ph...burbPatchNotes.

Signature banners:

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The following items are assigned to each trainee as they come in, assuming they do not already have them:

* Sylladex with eight cards, "basic" model (data structure sylladices such as array, ring, stack, and queue; other ones are available for a small fee)
* Strife deck with two cards (two -kinds). If trainees do not already have an assigned kind abstratus, they are given a low-level weapon of the kind abstratus of their choice. Those who have no preference get fancysantakind.
* Six copies of the standard uniform, correct size, including underclothing
* Linens and towels (Note: Dormitories have basic janitorial/maid service: emptying trash cans, washing clothes and linens, vacuuming, cleaning spills and restrooms.)
* Cubicle, and computer. Probably an older one, but good enough.

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Admins get their own actual offices, but they also sleep inside their offices rather than the dormitories. Offices vary in shape, size, and furnishing; since the admins do quite a bit more for the company, the perks are correspondingly greater.

Food is available in most cafeterias, of a variety great enough that anyone from nearly any world will eventually find something he/she/garyale likes.

If an employee wishes to go home "after work" (not that there is such a thing, technically, time being what it is in the vicinity of hundreds of Time-powered players), that can be arranged. It is a very rare thing though, and nobody really calibrates the "home" transportalizers to time properly, so there's generally shenanigans involved there, as well. Not lying to your partner about where you work is highly recommended.

Death is not permanent in this setting, as employees can be saved and restored in regular "backups". Loss of memories created since the last backup is common; permadeath is extremely uncommon, as if someone is missing for long enough they are automatically revived. "Missing" players tend to be inside the code, in pocket dimensions built upon pocket dimensions inside pocket dimensions trying to search out particularly weird bugs.

Or inside Skaianet Laboratories itself, for that matter. Currently the complex is rebuilding, but the previous floorplan was notorious for its recursive, fractal complexity. Programmable multi-destination transportalizers are the only way to get anywhere, as it's frighteningly easy to get lost in the corridors.

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It's your choice how any particular character is affected by the setting, or whether they are a trainee, employee, or admin. Just be aware the admins get to participate in all the cool plots, but at the same time they are also most adherent to the Skaianet philosophy, which goes something like this:

It is a good thing to kill worlds to spawn universes, but it is wrong to spare the world that you would have killed to spawn a universe, for each good requires a sacrifice. Therefore, Sburb is the ultimate expression of good, but only if it tests the players fairly and sufficiently, and only while there is no mechanism for preserving or recreating one's home planet.

Twisted? Yes. But they really do believe. Just ask Kira, she'll fix it for you if you don't already subscribe to such a philosophy. She'll fix it by mind-controlling you.

Sweet dreams.

[Thedude3445]

crap yeah new thread!

uhh I mean

IM: crap yeah new thread!

[JustAnotherUser]

((OOC: I think tD knows most about the Itchy situation.

Also, how long after thread one should this thread be? Daniel's kinda passed out))

[orngjce223]

((Give it a couple hours, probably.))

[trilbyulatingDungeoneer]

((Itchy was the source of the glitches, and possibly even faked several incidents that put us on the trail of Aline, AKA the Omnikid, who should definitely at least get a mention in the second post, imo. Itchy got into the Skaianet server room before the last thread even started. I think this thread should be set at least a week after the old one, probably more.))

[orngjce223]

((How about you PM me a full writeup and I'll drop it in there.

And a week would be OK, if a bit in-medias-res in sequence. Give me a moment to figure this out...))

[crash826]

((whoops. deleting post))

[JustAnotherUser]

((OOC: Right... Can I suggest we open with the celebratory Pizza?))

[trilbyulatingDungeoneer]

((man I would be so up for pizza. Irl, too, hahaha. Also, awesome thread title, orngjce. ))

[Aline]

[[OOC: Feel free to do so. Troublekid, I mean, Omnikid will cause more mischief as the thread passes, I promise xD]]

[Bluesunnyday]

((OOC: Yeah, post battle pizza parties sound great))

[orngjce223]

It's a week after they've killed Itchy and evacuated to their second universe, and the world is holding together just fine.

After the death of Itchy, the fire had suddenly ceased being holy. Several employees snaked long water hoses out of the Doors and put the remaining fire out. By that time, approximately 98% of the original campus was burnt to an empty shell. The Engineer of Space from the Buildings department declared the burnt-out husk that was Skaianet's original campus to be unstable, and recommended that everyone stay in the new universes to rebuild.

The transportalizer network went up the first day, and the desperately tired admins were provided with places to sleep while Space and Structure heroes began the arduous process of rebuilding.

Tricia... well, she didn't sleep. She couldn't. She remained in her upload-cube, approximately catatonic, using only the least trickle of energy extracted from the local space-fabric to examine and reexamine what she had done. What she had done for Skaianet's sake...

It was about seven days since they'd gotten out, and basic facilities were at least up, if inadequate. The employees were sleeping in shifts, indoor plumbing hadn't been incorporated yet, but food and water and shelter are sufficient. Skaianet employees take jaunts to the various planets of successful sections and traded for the food Consorts had grown, and a desalination plant is working in zone 7 to provide drinking water for all comers.

Tricia takes a moment, and re-manifests, and dissolves into their new network.

What has she missed? Mostly requisitions and missing-persons notices - she cringes - but eventually she finds the old encryption channel that she opened up, it almost seems like a lifetime ago, to Bluesunnyday while they'd been fighting -

%%SECURE CHANNEL%%
...Yeah, I'm fine.
%%%%

For some values of fine, she supposed, and began looking through the other systems.

[JustAnotherUser]

A week has passed since the troubleshooters took down Itchy. Tricia has recovered enough to grant them access into the buildings once more. The team stand in the cafeteria, and Daniel has removed a weapon from his strife deck.

He promptly uses it to roll several lumps of Pizza Dough flat.

"I'm telling you guys, I'm an ace cook. So, who wants what toppings? I'm fairly sure there's a Meat & Fish Freezer and a Veggie Storage in the kitchen."

[Bluesunnyday]

Well, it had been a week. And what a week it had been. Itchy had finally been destroyed, and due to the constant working, Bluesunnyday's non-coworker social interactions took a nosedive. Him and his wife had divorced, resulting in him also losing his daughter. She didn't really like him coming home scorched half to death and covered in bandages every day. Well, today the big pizza party to celebrate the rebuilding effort started, and he could hopefully lose his troubles in the company of his coworkers/friends.

"Just some pepperoni. And maybe extra cheese."

((OOC: Is anyone else seeing any potential Bluesunnyday Tricia?))

[crash826]

It's been a week since Itch became a corpse, and the Admin who served as a makeshift Breath player is still in his own little world. Adachi, the personality cast from its own body when Girard took over, is still trying to figure out what happened.

If she could pass out from exhaustion, she would. As is, she just uses bio-engines to consume pizza and hopes for the best for future.

"[I would love some peppers and cheese, Mr. Akton. Even if I cannot eat in the traditional sense, food makes wonderful biofuel.]"

She sighs.

"[And I'm hoping that Mr. Girard will come out if we feed him. He's still off somewhere in the CHASSIS systems, and I'm starting to worry.]"

[orngjce223]

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... you say? This'll be fun...

Also hop on IRC, I wanna plot with someone.

[trilbyulatingDungeoneer]

It's been a week since the 40,000 crazyfists marched to war.

A week since TD drummed for his life, and the life of every universe.

His arms are still in slings. It was pretty ridiculous.

"Ham, onion and whatever you feel like throwing on there, thanks. No sopor slime, though, I'm still more than tired enough as it is."

It's been a week since TD rocked so hard his arms almost fell off.

He pats the golden Cuccobo with one of his temporary bionic additions.

It's been a long week.

TD puts on his shades.

"At least that's one less ITCH that we have to...

SCRATCH."

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YYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

[crash826]

((SBURB Patch Notes II: An Admin's Guide to Multidimensional Love Shit))

[Aline]

It's been a week, a whole not-so-exciting week. the Omnikid, who spent half this period in a genderless form, started to take lessons from the resident Monk of Self, to learn to control hir beasts. She went back to Aline shape in the past two or three days for the sake of comfort; not everyone in the building was comfortable with a genderless Omnikid who could snap and became a brazen demon guy once again at any moment. Though, she was more worried about food. She didn't properly eat for a whole week. She was more than welcoming the pizza party.

"Thank you, any flavor for me is fine, as long as it doesn't have green peppers. They're icky!" She said, making a face of disapproval to green peppers.

[crash826]

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Just an idea, but... for PLOT:

The coding of an semi-malevolent, semi-incompetent new employee releases a session into the labs as its players are on the threshold of their ULTIMATE REWARD and alters their titles, exaggerating their power to the point of ridiculousness by giving them power over Skaianet code. They then decide to take down Skaianet by destroying some integral part of Skaianet systems.

[JustAnotherUser]

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I'm not against Tricia and Blue, but it gets kinda weird when you think about how Tricia is one with the offices.

"...Akton? My last name is Kopton, Adachi. And I'll make another pepperoni for you Aline."

Shaking his head, Daniel walks into the kitchen and comes out with armfuls of tomatoes, peppers, ham, onions, cheese and pepperoni. He continues making the pizzas whilst also continuing the conversation.

"Adachi, if you really need him out, I could check your systems and see if I can get him to come out, but can it wait until we're done here? I'm kinda busy."

He slides the four personal pizzas into an oven and uses his powers to cook it for a second at just the right temperature so as the contents cook perfectly. He extracts them, puts them on plates, cuts them quickly and hands them over.

"Careful! It's still kinda hot."

[crash826]

((whoops sorry misspelling

just like

pretend Adachi sucks with names))

"[Oh! Um, sorry, Mr. Kopton. I didn't mean to offend.]"

Adachi reaches down and picks up a slice, then puts it in her robomouth neatly as a whole and shuts it. A brief WOOMPH of flame can be heard as she processes it into biofuel.

"[Thank you for the fuel. And the offer. I'd love some help after you finish your important business.]"

[trilbyulatingDungeoneer]

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i just read that stuff and I gotta say, I kind of squee'd. Me. Squeeing. Multidimensional love shit is the best love shit.

"do we know if everyone else got out? Crash and Deaconari, for instance? Or just crash and the boys, for short?"

TD helps himself to a slice of pizza, and admires how stringy the cheese is for a long time.

Man, he wishes he was psychic, like a troll would be.

Stupid dumb bionics.

[Aline]

"Thank you!" Said Aline, carefully taking the pizza just so she wouldn't burn her hands. Her current form wasn't the one used to the wild flames of the Land of Fire and Brimstone, after all.

She takes a seat by a pretty isolated place, but still near enough from the other employees to be able to watch what they're doing. She was curious about something she've seen in some lines of programming, but didn't know how to ask.

She finally takes the courage, though. She knows she'll probably sound awkward and extremely newbish, but curiosity had the best of her.

"I have a question... Eh... What's that thing called romance?"