CASTELOCKED: eridan's adventures in hypnosis 101

[Thunder Reign]

Your name is SOLLUX CAPTOR.

Today is your WRIGGLING DAY, the sixth one you have suffered through on this GODFORSAKEN PLANET, but it isn't exactly a reason to celebrate. Not when you're... well, who you are. You sit at an awkward point of the HEMOSPECTRUM, the caste system that rules your ALIEN SOCIETY, and you hide your blood color in order to not draw attention to yourself. You live in a COMMUNAL HIVESTEM on the outskirts of a pretty dirty town where you seclude yourself away with your CODES.

Ah, yes. Your codes. You are an avid HACKER AND CODER, hiding from the outside world and immersing yourself in the digital one. You're too poor to afford any fancy mindframes or psionic bees or anything like that, so you salvage OLD TELEVISIONS and HUSKTOPS from rubbish tips and wire them up instead. Despite your best efforts, your hive is a GODDAMN MESS. Much like your hair.

You have just finished the code for a MULTIPLAYER GAME that your, well... your former MOIRAIL sent you. But you're not exactly sure what to do with it. In fact, you're not really sure what to do right now! Perhaps some omnipotent voice will tell you what to do?

Regardless, your trollTag is temperedAnemia, and you can't avoiid thpeakiing or typiing wiith your thomewhat thevere liithp.


(welp, first fanventure. i am sure i am going to mess this up terribly somehow. please do not be alarmed if updates change from my bad spriting to my bad artwork without warning.)

Updates will happen WHENEVER I DON'T KNOW ARARARARA ARRRRARRRHGH FEED ME SEYMOUR

TV TROPES PAGE OH MY GOODNESS ME

Alternate names for the thread: (note: spoilers contained within)

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Veinshifted? The Sanguine Switcheroo?

Hemohacked

Gray and Red Duality

Vocalise No Villainy?

"A Hemocentric Trading in Which the Lisping Programmer Who Prefers to Remain Anonymous in Blood Designs a Game for His Friends, of Whom Includes a Rust-blooded Paraplegic Paranormal Seer with a Fascination of the Wilderness, a Copper-blooded Fashionista Who Acts as a Semi-Caregiver of the Above Rust-blood, a One-Eyed Mustard-blooded Dragon Slayer Who Wears the Remnants of Her Victims, a Mysterious Olive-blood Who is Not Fully Revealed Until the End of the Exposition, a Slightly Androgynous Jade-blood Who Has Secluded Himself from the Rest of Society, a Teal-blood Who Deludes Himself in Fantasies of the Honorable Presider of the Judicial Process, and Without the Consumption of Green Depressant Slime Thinks of Himself as Such, a Cerulean-blood Who Uses the To-be-Emperor's Infactuation of Him (and Possibly His Natural Mind Controlling Abilities) to Gain Numerous Riches to Fund His Nefarious Schemes, a Blue-blood Whose Rage Takes Form in the Many Robotic Creatures She Designs, Whom Then Attack Her, an Indigo-blood Who Uses Most of His Spare Time Trying to Feed the Aforementioned Drug-Slime to the Aforementioned Law-Obsessed Troll, and When Once Forgotten Resulted in the Death of the Troll One Step Above Him on the Hemospectrum, a Purple-blooded Seadweller With a Passion for Archeology, and Whom Was Beheaded Due to the Previously-Stated Slime Incident, and Now is a Ghost Who is Trying to Set the Game in Motion, and a Fuchsia-blooded Seadweller Who Would be the Next Emperor of Their Race, If Not for Its Imminent Destruction, Who Takes Care of the Monstrous Bull Lusus Whose Bovine Call Could, and Shall, Wipe Out Most of the Remnants of Civilization After the Game Has Begun, and Whom is Taken Advantage of His Infatuation by the Sneaky Cerulean-blood;

Three Trolls Have Been the Causes of Devastating Effects on the Others; Two Have Been Irreversibly Damaged by Said Effects; Three Lusus begin the Story Dead; One is Unaccounted For; One Troll Wears an Extravagant Cape; One Troll Wears a Funny Hat; Another Wears a Skull; Numerous Creatures of the Undead Are Defeated by the Powers of Gardening."

FANART!!!

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By Shaitanist!!



By Pirouette!!


By Ashtastic!!


By Effy!!


priffyviole y u do dis 2 me

[ShadowOfFate]

>Look out the window.

[Panzerbear]

> Taste the slime leaking out of one of the cables.

[momatoes]

> Show your pretty eyes

[Thunder Reign]

>Look out the window.

Would you look at that! Something is on fire, YET AGAIN. You idly wonder how many trolls have died from what is obviously yet another lowblood arson attempt, and turn back to more important matters.

> Taste the slime leaking out of one of the cables.

Wow, no. You are not doing this. SOPOR SLIME would do nothing but make you giggly for the next few hours, and it rots your thinkpan anyway. You have no UNCONTROLLABLE MURDEROUS TENDENCIES to repress anyway, so you have absolutely no reason to ingest it! Seriously.

> Show your pretty eyes

A. No.
B. No.
C. Fuck no.

Glasses stay on. Forever. And ever. No questions. You don't like what happens when the glasses go off.

[Julia]

>The symbols Sollux, what do they mean

[momatoes]

> It's because you have Nic Cage eyes, isn't it
> It's okay, we'll accept you
> Take off your shades

[Thunder Reign]

>The symbols Sollux, what do they mean

GLAD YOU ASKED!

You are very eager to talk about these. After all, they are related to your MAGNUM OPUS, the best thing you have ever coded in your life. You took the strange writings and HIEROGLYPHS your former moirail found in a bizarre UNDERWATER TEMPLE and turned them into a fully functional game, one with REVOLUTIONARY MECHANICS, and you believe that this game might just be the thing to finally bring your shattered friends group BACK TOGETHER.

From what you can tell, the crocodiles and the turtles are companions of some sort, while the FROG is vastly important. It appears to tie the entire game together! You have spent the last sweep decoding and recoding and compiling the mechanics of this game and you are just about ready to distribute it out to the ELEVEN FRIENDS you were going to... play... with...



...oh. You guess that number is just ten now. Since she... died. And all.

You really miss your MOIRAIL. You wish you could have shared what you found with her. She would have been SO INTERESTED.

[crash826]

> Exposition on the death of your moirail

> Be interrupted by LUSUSSSSSSSSSSS D<

> Go physically assault your caretaker

[paradoxette]

>man up, get a new moirail and taunt your kismesis!

[momatoes]

> Sad memories, schmad memories. How are you going to piece your gang together if you don't pester at least one of them?

[Panzerbear]

>Examine writing on drapes.

[Thunder Reign]

> It's because you have Nic Cage eyes, isn't it
> It's okay, we'll accept you
> Take off your shades

What.

> Exposition on the death of your moirail

...You're... not really sure you want to talk about it. Not yet. It's taken you a while to come to terms with the fact that she's even dead, but the way she was killed still MAKES YOU QUEASY.

> Be interrupted by LUSUSSSSSSSSSSS D<
> Go physically assault your caretaker

Yeaaah, uh, about that. You sort of, well. You ought to explain. Your lusus was always particularly ornery, unusually so for his species: you would say that he was CRABBY, but he wasn't actually a crab. He was a biclops! A biclops who shared the same trait as you: YOUR EYES ARE THE COLOR OF YOUR BLOOD. Talk about an inconvenient mutation.

Due to this, he was always paranoid about you being KILLED due to your hemospectrum position. He encouraged you to hide away, to conceal your secret at any costs. But one night... well, he just went too far. He must have realized that his eyes drew suspicion and GOUGED THEM BOTH OUT before attempting to do the same to you. You knew what he was thinking, and you knew that ultimately it was a misguided attempt to PROTECT YOU.

But you had to PUT HIM DOWN.

In hindsight, maybe you were a bit hasty to do it. You felt bad about doing it, you really did- he was crazed, but he just wanted to protect you. Maybe you were a bit too influenced by a CERTAIN FRIEND. What's done is done, though. You have no lusus any more.

[crash826]

> Go talk to your "friends", attempt to recruit for the GAME you've ruinscoded. In particular, go talk to the one who is kind of MUSTARDY.

[Thunder Reign]

>man up, get a new moirail and taunt your kismesis!

Look at this mess. You already had your red emotional state ruined by your MOIRAIL / RED CRUSH dying (although you will admit, you've actually managed to get over the flushed status), your last attempt at auspisticing didn't end well, and you have never actually felt enough non-platonic hate for a kismesis! You are sure this is the way things are going to be forever, and you will never have any quadrant changes in the future, because surely nothing interesting will happen in the future.

Moving on.

>Examine writing on drapes.

Yeahhhh. Well. Let's just say you have a certain friend who doesn't understand PERSONAL SPACE. And likes to leave their mark any way they can... whether that's by replacing your furniture with things in the mustard yellow they have for BLOOD, or scribbling stuff all over your possessions in GREY PAINT. Where the hell did that even come from? Isn't paint supposed to be made of CULLED WIGGLERS? You don't question the things your friend does any more.

> Sad memories, schmad memories. How are you going to piece your gang together if you don't pester at least one of them?

> Go talk to your "friends", attempt to recruit for the GAME you've ruinscoded. In particular, go talk to the one who is kind of MUSTARDY.

You know what? Sure. Sure thing.



-- temperedAnemia [TA] began trolling gastronomicCheat [GC] --

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TA: GC, phone home.
GC: TH0LLUXTH!!! Y0U KN0W THAT Y0UR 2TUPID M0VIE REFERENCE2 D0NT MEAN 2HIT T0 ME. GET BETTER MATERIAL!!! >;]
TA: are we really goiing through thiith thong and dance for the miilliionth time or can you let me get down to buthiinethth?
GC: H0H0H0H0H0H0H0
GC: Y0URE T00 EA2Y T0 BAIT, THOLLUXTH!
GC: LAAAAME
TA: augh, don't quadruple your vowelth, you thound jutht liike her.
GC: WELL EXCU2E ME F0R BEING EXCITED >;/ WHY ARE Y0U 20 GRUMPY T0DAY, ANYWAY??
TA: how about the fact that ii have been up to my thhiiveriing anonymouth-blooded nook in codeth for the latht thweep, fiinally fiigured iit out and fiiniithhed compiiliing iit all…
GC: AND Y0U FIGURED 0UT THE C0DE WA2 JU2T AN ENC0DED PICTURE 0F FI2H-HIP2TER FLIPPING Y0U 0FF, RIGHT
GC: THAT2 T0TALLY HER 2TYLE
GC: 0R... WA2
GC: >;/
TA: too soon. too soon.
TA: ii wath goiing to thay that not only can ii not get in touch wiith her. thiince thhe iith DEAD.
TA: but apparently everyone hateth each other thiince ii began the damn project.
TA: the iidea of haviing uth cooperate jutht went down the load gaper.
TA: what am ii thuppothed to do now?
GC: I W0ULDNT L02E H0PE JU2T YET
GC: MAYBE THEY D0NT ALL HATE EACH 0THER THAT MUCH
GC: BE2IDE2 Y0U 2AID THERE WERE TW0 TEAM2 RIGHT???
TA: no ii diidn't.
GC: ...
TA: ...
GC: AAAAAAAGH!!! THE V0ICE2 T0LD ME AGAIN!!!
GC: I TH0UGHT I HAD 2T0PPED LI2TENING T0 THEM
TA: ii thiink the voiiceth are jutht thomethiing you're never goiing to get riid of.
GC: YOURE NOT THE 0NE LI2TENING T0 THEM, JERK
TA: can we just pre-emptiively turn thiith away from the iineviitable thelf-hatred fest and talk about the teamth? ii wath goiing to athk iif you wanted to lead one.
GC: REALLY?? IM 20 FLATTERED THOLLUXTH. H0H0H0H0H0H0H0H0H0
GC: WAIT
GC: I UNDER2TAND Y0U ARE 20 IMPRE22ED BY MY BATTLE TALENT2 AND ALL
GC: BUT D0NT Y0U WANT 20ME0NE LE22 CRAZY T0 LEAD >;/
TA: ath long ath that thocket iin your face doethn't iinterrupt your abiiliity to play viideo gameth, you're the priime candiidate for leader of...
GC: WHAT
GC: WHAT???
TA: the red team.
GC: AWWWWW
GC: DID Y0U MAKE IT RED JU2T F0R ME >;]
GC: ARENT Y0U JU2T THE 2WEETE2T
TA: thiiiigh. we'll thee iif that even lathtth wiith mitihter thootypantth around.
GC: 0KAY WHAT DID THAT LA2T 2ENTENCE EVEN SAY
GC: Y0UR LI2P I2 0FFICIALLY UNREADABLE, C0NGRATULATI0N2
TA: ...
TA: "sigh. we'll see if that even lasts with mister snootypants around."
GC: 0H
GC: 0H MY G0D Y0URE N0T 2ERI0U2LY INVITING THEM ARE Y0U
GC: Y0U G0 T0 ALL THAT TR0UBLE T0 HIDE Y0UR2ELF AWAY AND Y0U JU2T D0 20METHING 2UICIDAL LIKE THAT???
GC: I TH0UGHT I WA2 MEANT T0 BE THE 2ELF-DE2TRUCTIVE 0NE HERE >;/
TA: ii told you to thtop doiing that, fiirthtly.
TA: and thecondly, ii have to iinviite them, iit'th iin the code.
GC: FINE
GC: WELL I CALL DIB2 0N Y0U F0R BEING IN MY TEAM THEN >;]
TA: fiine wiith me. now iif you'll excuse me ii have to thpread thiith around liike a venereal diitheathe.
GC: H0H0H0H0 I GET IT
TA: you do? that'th a miiracle.
GC: N0 THE J0KE I2 Y0U EVER GETTING CL02E EN0UGH T0 ANY0NE EL2E T0 2PREAD A DI2EA2E, N00KWHIFF >;]
TA: ow, my feeliingth.
GC: H0H0H0H0H0H0H0H0
TA: ii'm tho cut.
GC: 0KAY 0KAY
GC: BYE

What now...?

[crash826]

> Let's see your list of idiots"friends."

> Also troll your other close-ish buddies, like your exclusively ornery bro.

[genericuser2]

> : Accidentally bring up folder of "Hunk Rump."
> : Send a certain troll misleading links to Hoofbeast Pornography.
> : Be momentarily hacked by some athhole using your symbol and a different blood color. Now he's gone. Mutht be a glitch.
> : (Or is it?)

[Varkarrus]

Talk to the one who likes musclebeasts.

[Thunder Reign]

> Let's see your list of idiots"friends."

Welcome to the madhouse. You would draw in lines indicating WHO HATES WHO, but it would honestly take too much time.

> Also troll your other close-ish buddies, like your exclusively ornery bro.

--- temperedAnemia [TA] began trolling commandingGenetics [CG] ---

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TA: tho.
CG: Yes, what is it? You know I'm pretty fucking busy.
TA: remember that thiing ii wath making?
CG: Wait, wait, I KNOW HOW THIS IS GOING TO FUCKING GO.
CG: WE'RE GOING ON ANOTHER MAGICAL GUILT TRIP TO THE LAND OF CG-LET-EVERYONE-DOWN.
CG: I HAVE ALREADY FIRED SOBBING WHIMPERING APOLOGIES OUT OF ALL FIVE OF MY GELATINOUS ORIFICES AT HIGH SPEED IN THE DIRECTION OF EVERYONE WHO I FUCKED UP THE LIVES OF BY DROPPING THE BALL SPECTACULARLY.
CG: THERE IS LITERALLY NOTHING LEFT FOR ME TO DO EXCEPT PROSTRATE MYSELF BEFORE YOUR SCUMSUCKING PROBABLY-A-REDBLOOD ASS FOR MY SEVERE MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE.
CG: I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST SAID THAT. FUCK THIS, FUCK ME, FUCK EVERYTHING.
TA: actually ii wath meththagiing you to tell you that the code iith all done. :/
CG: Oh.
CG: Well you should have fucking said that before shouldn't you?
TA: ii temporariily forgot your penchant for mathochiithtiic behaviior. thhame on me.
CG: I still think you're deluded for thinking that this is going to succeed.
CG: That little arms war is still going on, in case you hadn't noticed.
TA: ii had. but ii have to try. these trollth are all my friiendth, even iif they are murderouth thcum-thuckiing bathtardth.
TA: and when ii dream, ii dream of all of us playiing.
CG: What, even…?
TA: yeth.
CG: BULLSHIT, LIKE ANYONE WOULD GIVE HIM A SECOND CHANCE.
CG: I'M THE ONLY ONE LEFT THAT EVEN TALKS TO HIM.
TA: the heiir doeth.
CG: THEY DON'T COUNT AND YOU FUCKING KNOW IT. THAT NOOKWHIFF DOESN'T DESERVE EVEN A SIXTH OF THEIR GLORIOUS FINS.
TA: oh goody we're onto your theadweller envy iiththueth now, are we?
CG: DO ME A FAVOR AND NEVER TRY AND SHOVE THE WORD "ISSUES" THROUGH YOUR MANGLED DEFORMED MANDIBLES EVER AGAIN, NOT EVEN IN TEXT FORM. THAT WAS LIKE WATCHING A MUSCLEBEAST CRUSH A TROLL WITH THEIR BULGE IN SLOW MOTION: CRUEL AND UNNECESSARY.
TA: have ii ever told you that your metaphorth diithturb the fuck out of me.
CG: BITE ME, BULGESTAIN.
TA: like ii wath THAYIING before you triied to deraiil the topiic yet again, we are all meant to play. even him.
TA: tho hereth the code.

--- [temperedAnemia] has sent folder SGRUB to [commandingGenetics]---

CG: How does this work, then?
TA: iit'th a chaiin thythtem. a chaiin... pattern? yeah that word workth. the therver maniipulateth the cliient'th enviironment.
TA:the objectiive iith to enter the Mediium.
CG: The WHAT NOW?
TA: ii'll explaiin later. iit'll be fiine. pathth iit on.
TA: thend iit on?
TA: tranthmiit iit on?
TA: convey iit on. there we go.
CG: Watching you try and find synonyms for "send" that aren't butchered by your stupid teeth is getting more painful than it is amusing.
CG: SO I'M GOING. BYE.

That went about as well as you expected.

[crash826]

> To whom are you referring when you speak of that nookwhiff?

> Shriek like a screechbeast and bleed in your recuperacoon.

[genericuser2]

> : Accidentally bring up folder of "Hunk Rump."
> : Send a certain troll misleading links to Hoofbeast Pornography.
> : Be momentarily hacked by some athhole using your symbol and a different blood color. Now he's gone. Mutht be a glitch.
> : (Or is it?)

[Thunder Reign]

> : Accidentally bring up folder of "Hunk Rump."
> : Send a certain troll misleading links to Hoofbeast Pornography.
> : Be momentarily hacked by some athhole using your symbol and a different blood color. Now he's gone. Mutht be a glitch.
> : (Or is it?)

>Talk to the one who likes musclebeasts.

This mysterious character wishes to step out of the introductory sequence and establish they are offended by this slight against their person. They are certain this rudeness refers to them and they are tired of people's lewd insinuations about their character! Just because they are unnaturally strong does not mean they have to be fetishistic about strength. They are so amazingly offended.

Now they will step back, to be introduced as the side character they are when the time is right.

> To whom are you referring when you speak of that nookwhiff?
> Shriek like a screechbeast and bleed in your recuperacoon.

"That nookwhiff", as your ornery bro so tenderly calls them, is the HEIR TO THE THRONE. They have the highest blood ever seen in a troll, but their personality... leaves something to be desired. You personally don't mind them, but a certain indigo-blood with a hemospectrum allegiance is pretty displeased at their lack of a spine. Either way, they'll be playing SGRUB eventually.

And that second command is dumb! Dumb dumb dumb! YOU WOULD NEVER FOLLOW SUCH A STUPID ORDER!



You sort of slide into your recuperacoon sans-bleeding instead and promptly wonder why the fuck you did that.

[.:.]

Troll/Pass On code to abyssAdventurer.

[OrangeAipom]

Is CG blue or purple? o_O

[.:.]

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Is CG blue or purple? o_O

I Think he's canon!Gamzee's purple, but the colours on the ChumpRoll are wrong .w.