Homestesque (Third thread is thread three!)

[CSJ]

There is a very high chance that whoever sent you the note will be very annoyed at you if you do not accept the offering of food.
So eat the steak.

Eat the steak.

Eat it.

EAT IT.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

[General Disorder]

There is a very high chance that whoever sent you the note will be very annoyed at you if you do not accept the offering of food.
So eat the steak.

Eat the steak.

Eat it.

EAT IT.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

YOU, GIRL
GET UP
GET UP ON THOSE LITTLE MARY SUE LEGS OF YOURS
AND GO EAT THAT STEAK
I SAID GO EAT THE STEAK, GIRL
YOU'RE REALLY TICKING ME OF NOW, WOMAN
ILL FIND THOSE FREAKY SUN PROTECTORS AND SHOVE THEM THROUGH YOUR BREATHING HOLE YOU KNOW THAT?
YOU'RE A FOOD-WASTING WIMP
MAKES ME SICK
GET UP AND EAT THE STEAK
YOU EAT THAT STEAK THIS INSTANT

Sarah: You cannot do it. You cannot eat the steak.

[CSJ]

There is a very high chance that whoever sent you the note will be very annoyed at you if you do not accept the offering of food.
So eat the steak.

Eat the steak.

Eat it.

EAT IT.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

YOU, GIRL
GET UP
GET UP ON THOSE LITTLE MARY SUE LEGS OF YOURS
AND GO EAT THAT STEAK
I SAID GO EAT THE STEAK, GIRL
YOU'RE REALLY TICKING ME OF NOW, WOMAN
ILL FIND THOSE FREAKY SUN PROTECTORS AND SHOVE THEM THROUGH YOUR BREATHING HOLE YOU KNOW THAT?
YOU'RE A FOOD-WASTING WIMP
MAKES ME SICK
GET UP AND EAT THE STEAK
YOU EAT THAT STEAK THIS INSTANT

YOU LISTENING TO YOUR STOMACH, GIRL?
YOU'VE BEEN TREATING ME ROUGH FOR TOO LONG
FUCK, I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE LAST TIME YOU TUCKED INTO ANYTHING WITH MORE PROTEIN THAN LENTIL SOUP
LET ALONE A PERFECTLY-COOKED PLATE OF FREAKING CORN-FED PRIME BEEF STEAK

LOOK AROUND GIRL
THERE IS NO-ONE ELSE IN THIS CELL
AND THERE IS NO-ONE HERE MISSING LUNCH
YOU EARNED IT
THAT PLATE IS YOURS

THOSE STARVING ORPHANS WOULD MURDER FOR THAT PRIME CUT OF FREAKING SIRLOIN
YOU ARE GOING TO USE THOSE TWO SMOOTH-SKINNED HANDS OF YOURS
GRAB THAT PLATE OF MEDIUM-RARE STEAK RIGHT NOW
SHOVE THAT MEAT IN YOUR MOUTH
AND EAT IT

I DON'T CARE IF IT'S NOT HALAL
I DON'T CARE IF YOU CAN'T CHEW
I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE A VEGAN

YOU WILL PICK IT UP
YOU WILL EAT IT
AND YOU WILL ENJOY IT

[Cyros]

show spoiler

hide spoiler

There is a very high chance that whoever sent you the note will be very annoyed at you if you do not accept the offering of food.
So eat the steak.

Eat the steak.

Eat it.

EAT IT.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

YOU, GIRL
GET UP
GET UP ON THOSE LITTLE MARY SUE LEGS OF YOURS
AND GO EAT THAT STEAK
I SAID GO EAT THE STEAK, GIRL
YOU'RE REALLY TICKING ME OF NOW, WOMAN
ILL FIND THOSE FREAKY SUN PROTECTORS AND SHOVE THEM THROUGH YOUR BREATHING HOLE YOU KNOW THAT?
YOU'RE A FOOD-WASTING WIMP
MAKES ME SICK
GET UP AND EAT THE STEAK
YOU EAT THAT STEAK THIS INSTANT

YOU LISTENING TO YOUR STOMACH, GIRL?
YOU'VE BEEN TREATING ME ROUGH FOR TOO LONG
FUCK, I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE LAST TIME YOU TUCKED INTO ANYTHING WITH MORE PROTEIN THAN LENTIL SOUP
LET ALONE A PERFECTLY-COOKED PLATE OF FREAKING CORN-FED PRIME BEEF STEAK

LOOK AROUND GIRL
THERE IS NO-ONE ELSE IN THIS CELL
AND THERE IS NO-ONE HERE MISSING LUNCH
YOU EARNED IT
THAT PLATE IS YOURS

THOSE STARVING ORPHANS WOULD MURDER FOR THAT PRIME CUT OF FREAKING SIRLOIN
YOU ARE GOING TO USE THOSE TWO SMOOTH-SKINNED HANDS OF YOURS
GRAB THAT PLATE OF MEDIUM-RARE STEAK RIGHT NOW
SHOVE THAT MEAT IN YOUR MOUTH
AND EAT IT

I DON'T CARE IF IT'S NOT HALAL
I DON'T CARE IF YOU CAN'T CHEW
I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE A VEGAN

YOU WILL PICK IT UP
YOU WILL EAT IT
AND YOU WILL ENJOY IT

This can be summed up easily... with cats.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Sarah: Make your way to your mutual "friend" in the least Mary Sue-ish way possible.

[PaperHelmet]

Sarah: Check to see if you still have your captchalogue deck and syllabus.



Syllabus? That sounds serious. If you did have it, you're awfully glad you don't anymore!

Joking aside, you do indeed still have your SYLLADEX. You're not exactly sure if that's something that can be rightly taken from you anyway. Speaking of which, you take this time to captchalogue the NOTE. You'll no doubt need to return this message to its owner, for confidentiality's sake.

You crack open your STOPWATCH FETCH MODUS and assign the NOTE to a CARD. You'd rather not wait too long to withdraw the NOTE when the time comes, but you'd also want to have enough time to ready yourself and avoid an embarrassing STOPWATCH LOCKUP, so setting the CARD to 4 SECONDS should do nicely.
































Sarah: Store the steak in it.



Oh very well.

But you're STILL not eating the thing until you get some answers. This is a matter of hospitality we're talking about here!



































Sarah: Critically peruse surroundings.



You are alone in a HEWN STONE ROOM. The floor is STONE, the WALLS are STONE, the CEILING is STONE, and the DOOR is STONE.

Upon the STONE floor lies three BAGS, which you assume are SLEEPING BAGS. There is a BIN of some kind across the room from you that seems to be filled with GARBAGE. You arrive at the conclusion that you're not the only one who occupies these quarters.

What will you do?

[CSJ]

> Investigate drink container and sleeping-bags; garbage rummaging is beneath you

>Attempt to analyse stone surrounds; you were paying attention in geology class, right?

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Maybe it has perfect cleavage...








*gigglesnort*

[harmoniousExtremes]

>Remember childhood full of banana-tree kicking fondly, then kick a hole in the wall.

[Restless Roamer]

> Sarah: Check for cracks in the walls.

[StarZeph]

After kicking hole in wall discover...another wall.

[Medinoc]

Attempt to open door.

[Firebird766]

Rule 1 of adventuring: Check everything! Go look in the garbage bin, the sleeping bags, that drink container...

[Ario]

Pick up the pumpkin that's in the garbage.

Check garbage for other useful things.

[Ryuu]

>Use Straw as BRAIN EXTRACTION UNIT

[StarZeph]

Realize weird door handle is actually a puzzle: solve it in like 3 off-screen seconds.

[deificAnuran]

>3rd and 4th Walls: Have stuff on yourselves

[CSJ]

>3rd and 4th Walls: Have Andre

FTFY

[StarZeph]

>3rd and 4th Walls: Have Adrian

FTFY

FTFY AGAIN

One of the inmates: Be completely obsessed with the great untold god Adrian. Have posters covering both of those walls. Be completely devout in your belief that all people must convert to your religion or life will cease to function as you know it.

This person is obviously crazy. Why would the great creator of the universe be named Adrian?

Although having those two walls covered in Andre posters would also be hilarious.

Edit: Although on a more serious note, having it so that somewhere in the castle the damsel could see what was going on with her players would actually be a pretty good idea.

[bookworm773]

>Rummage through the trash. Maybe you'll find some answers. Or at least something entertaining.

[RedCapAvenger]

>Search the Trash
>>Search under the Sleeping Bags

[Laboot]

Sarah: Have a Steak Out

[EmuLegs]

Sarah: Have a Steak Out

oh u

[CSJ]

Although having those two walls covered in Andre posters would also be hilarious.

On the 4th wall of course. I doubt Sarah will be able to break the 4th wall.

heh

[TheLonelyScribe]

> Put trash in the bags.
> Put steak in the trash.
> Take drink out of drink container.

[deificAnuran]

>3rd and 4th Walls: Have Adrian

FTFY

FTFY AGAIN

One of the inmates: Be completely obsessed with the great untold god Adrian. Have posters covering both of those walls. Be completely devout in your belief that all people must convert to your religion or life will cease to function as you know it.

This person is obviously crazy. Why would the great creator of the universe be named Adrian?

Although having those two walls covered in Andre posters would also be hilarious.

Edit: Although on a more serious note, having it so that somewhere in the castle the damsel could see what was going on with her players would actually be a pretty good idea.

>Biggest Poster on Wall: Be this

[JRCrusher]

>Biggest Poster on Wall:

That is the best poster.