Myrtle Head

[mythLeader]

Dick Rhombushead.

Well, that's what you like to call him, in your head. But you're pretty sure that's not his real name.

> His name is Rutherford Hayes.

Oh, yes, of course! You should have remembered that, because he likes to call himself "The Prez" because he has the same name as nineteenth president of the United States Rutherford B. Hayes. (Well, the same first and last names, anyway... you're not sure whether his middle initial is B.) This is just one of many annoying things he does. I mean, seriously, it's not like he has the same name as one of the important presidents. Nobody cares about Rutherford B. Hayes!

> First thing's first. Never ever talk to someone while you or they are peeing.

Well, yeah, obviously you're not going to talk to him while you're standing here at the urinals. But you won't be standing here forever. Far too soon, you'll be finished here, and then you'll both go to wash your hands, and conversation will be inevitable.

Unless... unless maybe you can think of some sort of CLEVER RUSE to avoid talking to this jerk?

[SNeakyRobot]

> You must pee so long that he has washed his hands and left by the time you've finished.

[mythLeader]

> You must pee so long that he has washed his hands and left by the time you've finished.

Okay, sure you needed to go pretty badly, but you still can't just produce an infinite amount of urine. Your BLADDER GLUT statistic is getting dangerously low. You're pretty sure you can't keep this up much longer!

And you certainly can't just stand at the urinal not peeing. That would be weird.

You've got to think of a better way to avoid having to talk to this jackass after you're done peeing. Otherwise you might have to have a conversation with him. And that would be horrible.

Seriously, he is such a jerk.

[Chwoka]

Headbutt and run! I'm your Id and listen to me!

[SNeakyRobot]

> Well you certainly can't go handling fruit with your filthy unwashed hands, so simply running isn't an option. How about you cough uncontrollably the whole time you're washing. He wouldn't be able to slip a word in.

[Chwoka]

> Well you certainly can't go handling fruit with your filthy unwashed hands, so simply running isn't an option. How about you cough uncontrollably the whole time you're washing. He wouldn't be able to slip a word in.

Ugh, you and your ego.

[SNeakyRobot]

you and your ego.

Incidentally, that was my favorite book as a child. Dad would read it to me every night before I went to bed. The most child friendly way to learn about conciousness and self-concept.

[Phevnil]

Continue to stand at the urinal, make pissing noises with your mouth.

[mythLeader]

Blargh. So much for my goal of updating daily. Sorry; the last few days have been horribly busy. (Somehow when I started this adventure, I had a lot of free time so I figured it wouldn't be a problem to keep up with the updates, then of course as soon as I start the adventure suddenly I get bogged down with all sorts of other stuff.) Update coming tonight (or early tomorrow morning).

[EDIT: Scratch that. Tomorrow morning for sure, though. Sorry; I know exactly what I want to happen in the next update; I've just had absolutely no spare time the last few days to get a chance to draw it. But, yeah, update tomorrow morning. Sorry for the delay.]

[EDIT: AARGH! Okay, TOMORROW (Friday) morning for sure. Seriously, this week I've just been incredibly busy.]

[mythLeader]

Okay, I really have no good excuse for not having finished the next update yesterday. Sure, the week before that had been busy, but yesterday I actually did have some free time and could have done it, and I kept putting it off. I guess partly because I was a little daunted; this next update I'd intended to have an animation much more complex than anything so far in the adventure, and I... guess I wasn't really looking forward to doing that? Still, I really ought to have done it yesterday.

Still, while I don't have the whole update done yet, I've gone way too long without an update, so I'm going to at least put up a partial update now. The rest of the update will be coming tomorrow (FOR REALZ THIS TIME).

Continue to stand at the urinal, make pissing noises with your mouth.

Yeah... you're pretty sure he's not falling for that.

Looks like you're going to get done here at the same time, whether you want to or not. But maybe while you're washing your hands another idea will come to you...

[Dxpenguinman]

> EAT YOUR FRUIT to fill your BLADDER GLUT, thus causing you to URINATE longer.

[SNeakyRobot]

> "Yo no habla Inglés"

[Dxpenguinman]

You know, this Dick Rombushead guy looks exactly like some fictional character...I just can't remember whom.

[mythLeader]

> EAT YOUR FRUIT to fill your BLADDER GLUT, thus causing you to URINATE longer.

It's not that easy... sure, that could fill your BLADDER GLUT, but not instantly. It would take some time to work through your system. And by then it would be too late.

Besides, you need that fruit to show to potential business partners!

> "Yo no hablo inglés"

That would definitely be worth a try... if Hayes didn't already know you. Unfortunately, this isn't the first time you've met, and he already knows you speak English.

You briefly contemplate trying to convince him you'd forgotten how to speak English... but no. Hayes is a jerk, but he's not an idiot.

> How about you cough uncontrollably the whole time you're washing. He wouldn't be able to slip a word in.

*Cough* *Cough* *Cough*

"Hey, Salazar, how's it going? Thought I'd see you here. Still working the South American beat, I take it? Seen any chupacabras lately? Heh heh heh."

==>



*COUGH* *COUGH* *COUGH*

"Say, sounds like you've got a bit of a cough there. Been bothering you long? I know a doctor you ought to see; fix you right up. Here's his card. He's expensive, but he's worth it. Besides, looks like you could stand to shave a little off your food budget anyway. Getting a bit of a gut there, am I right?"

Did he... did he just put that BUSINESS CARD in your inventory? Dammit, Hayes, you don't put things in other people's inventories without asking! Who does that?

Also, it looks like he's standing in front of your inventory now, which is kind of weird. You're not sure how he's doing that, but it's annoying.

==>



*COUGH!!* *COUGH!!* *COUGH!!*

"So, you check out the booth babes in the exhibit hall yet? Always one of my favorite parts of the conference."

Oh, God, he just won't shut up! This isn't working! Whatdoyoudowhatdoyoudowhatdoyoudo...

Headbutt and run!

==>



Okay, now that you've had a chance to calm down a little, you're... you're thinking that may not have been such a great idea. I mean, sure, it got you out of the conversation, but you're pretty sure headbutting people in the gut isn't really considered an acceptable course of action at business conferences.

Yeah... you kind of panicked there.

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Ookay... probably won't be doing any more animations as complicated as the headbutt animation any time soon. (Okay, maybe it doesn't look all that complicated, but that was really my first time trying a drawn frame-by-frame animation, and it... took a while.)

You know, this Dick Rombushead guy looks exactly like some fictional character...I just can't remember whom.

Really? If so, it's a coincidence... he's not patterned after anyone. Actually, my main goal in his character design was to make him sort of a contrast with Robert Salazar... Robert's head is a (rounded) rectangle, so Hayes' is a rectangle turned diagonally (a rhombus); Robert's eyes are horizontal ovals, so Hayes' are vertical ovals.

[Riou]

Walk away like nothing happened.

[mythLeader]

Walk away like nothing happened.

Doot doo doo, you are just passing by, you know nothing about any headbutting that may or may not have occurred...

[SNeakyRobot]

> Go to where ever you're supposed to go now. Maybe your company has a booth?

[Loather of Irk]

> Go to where ever you're supposed to go now. Maybe your company has a booth?

Wherever it is, you need to casually stroll there as quickly as you can. The Dick is only a door away!

[EnigmaticD]

>Chat up booth babes on the way to your company's booth.

EDIT: Additionally, punch nearest one in snout to establish superiority. Ladies love that.

[Chwoka]

Now that you have shown your physical prowess, it is time to go find a mating partner. Your basest desires demand it.

[mythLeader]

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Okay, I did not intend to go this long without an update. I had some paid freelance work I'd been procrastinating that I had to catch up with, and then... well, I've been feeling a little daunted because the latest commands have led up to something that's going to require a big Flash update that I'm not done with yet, and that's going to take me a while...

But I'll bring things up to just before the Flash update, anyway. And I'll try not to let this much time pass between updates again.

Now that you have shown your physical prowess, it is time to go find a mating partner.

Okay, you know you shouldn't have done that, but still... the fact you beat Hayes in a physical fight (well, sort of) does sort of make you feel strong and manly. And, yeah, you could do with some female companionship. "Mating" might be rushing things a little, but no harm in finding someone to, you know, have a few drinks with, see where it goes...

==>



It occurs to you, however, that if you want to meet women, in front of the men's restroom may not be the ideal place for it.

The Dick is only a door away!

Right, that too. All the more reason to get out of here as soon as possible.

> Go to where ever you're supposed to go now. Maybe your company has a booth?

Of course it does, but you don't have to man the booth yourself. That's what you have interns for! Still, yeah, it's time to hit the exhibit hall!

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Like I said, the next update is going to be a rather complicated Flash update, so it may not be up till... let's say Wednesday. (Wednesday at the latest, that is; I'll try to have it up earlier.) After that, I'll see if I can get back on a daily update schedule.

By the way, EnigmaticD, I'm not ignoring your suggestion. I'm just saving it till after the Flash update. It's coming.

[K25fF]

Inwards! Trail randomly around the hall until you bump into someone.

[SNeakyRobot]

> Try to make a sale or something.

[mythLeader]

Okay, blargh, so much for updating on Wednesday. (By which, when I posted that, I meant last Wednesday, i.e. a week ago. Obviously that didn't happen.) I've just been really bogged down with work these last few weeks, and this next update, like I said, is going to take a while.

But I promise I haven't abandoned this adventure; the update is coming. Probably some time this weekend. Friday night or Saturday morning, most likely.

Sorry for the delay. When the update's finally up, though, it should be clear why it's taken so long. (Though I still would have had it done a long time ago if it weren't for everything else I've had to deal with lately... seriously, though, after this next update my update speed should be picking up again.)

Now, to prevent this from being a contentless bump, I guess this is as good a time as any to mention that Myrtle Head has a...

(I'll edit the initial post to include this when I make the next update.)

[mythLeader]

Grarr. I keep setting myself deadlines for when I expect to have the update done by, and then I keep not doing it.

But I seriously should be able to do it now. It's mostly the fault of that big freelance job I mentioned earlier... it was a lot of work (and every time I thought I was getting caught up, there turned out to be more left to do on it than I expected), and I was coming up to the deadline, and I really didn't have time for much else. (Which is why I hadn't been giving suggestions in other threads lately, either.) But as of this morning (er... well, it's past midnight now, so I guess technically as of yesterday morning), I finally finished that project and sent it off! Huzzah! So yes, now I seriously ought to have some free time again, and can maybe set a deadline I can actually meet. Let's say... uh, well, I do have things to do this weekend, so I don't know if I can promise getting it done tomorrow or anything, but let's say no later than Tuesday morning I resolve to finally finish this update.

I don't have any other major freelance jobs on the horizon -- and if I do get another one, I'm going to make sure to work on it more gradually instead of leaving so much of it to so close to the deadline so it won't eat up all my time like this one did -- so after I finally finish this update, I really will be able to get back to updating regularly again. Sorry again for all the delays. (I promise this will be the last post I make in the thread about my failure to update. The next post I make will finally be the actual update.)