Trollslum Cafe LXXIX: Slam with the Best

[Araiss]

Welcome to the Trollslum Café!

Our Guiding Principle: We are fans of Homestuck, and of the trolls in particular. We like to make fantrolls, and we love to roleplay them. And so, once upon a time, this thread was created as a place to host new, undeveloped trolls so that players could flesh them out while interacting with other characters. This is the primary purpose of the Café.

Moderators

There are moderators to keep quality control of the Café. They will enforce rules, post new threads, and are generally around to help you if you have a problem or a question that needs answering. The current list of mods are..

Suds McFuddle
Steev
Overlard
Araiss
Cliff_Racer
Blank
Ocfos

Notice to newer players: We highly encourage you to post a profile in the trollslum thread or in the critique thread before starting your roleplaying experience in the Café. Getting some feedback on your character before you start playing can help you make a better character and avoid some common pitfalls.

Below are some rules that we would like you to follow when you post in the Café. Please read them carefully, whether you are new or old to the Café!

1. Characters and Settings

The Café is located somewhere on Alternia (the troll homeworld populated by the young). Any troll on Alternia can access it. Mutants, aliens, and freaks overall are not accepted. This means no aliens (humans included), abominations, undead, ghosts, robots*, freaks*, and mutants*. General fandom for adult trolls starts at 10 sweeps and older, which means they would be off planet in the fleet or culled for failing to provide genetic material at that age, so trolls over 10 sweeps are strongly discouraged*.

* <- The above asterisks note exceptions for good cause: if you're sending a troll of this nature in the Café, they must have a good reason to be alive (or still on the planet, in the case of adults). If your character falls into one of these categories, the moderators will ask you to justify the reason for them to be considered an exception to the rules. These exceptions must all be of Trollish origin as this is the Trollslum Cafe. Also a good rule of thumb is that it shouldn't force every single head to turn if they enter the cafe.

The Café is also set outside of a SGRUB or S***B continuity. No troll knows about any game information or about humans. Aspects and characters from what would be from a SGRUB or S***B session (god tier/S***B powers) are also banned, save them for a session roleplay.

2. Participating in the Café; Guidelines for Posting

There are no pre-requisites for joining the Café. Simply jump in and start a conversation with someone who is unoccupied.

a. Indicate which character you are speaking to if you are starting a conversation. If there is no name, be as specific as possible.
b. You can quote the previous post to enhance the clarity of responses, but use spoiler tags and do not post quote pyramids. You can be infracted for this.
c. Before beginning a conversation, make sure the character isn't already talking to someone. Interrupting a one-on-one conversation is rude, though planned interruptions are fine. If they tell you to go away please respect that decision.
d. When speaking OOC (out-of-character, as yourself) use (( parentheses )) or [[ brackets ]] to indicate OOC speech.
e. Post containing only OOC chat are prohibited. Go to the Trollslum General Chat Thread or a private medium for that.
f. Images posted here may consist of only standard sprites or AB (Alterniabound) sprites of your character. Meme/OOC images are forbidden; use common sense.
g. If you want to roleplay something that isn't allowed (see below), there are other mediums for roleplaying: instant messengers, including the Pesterchum client; typewith.me or sync.in collaborative documents; and private messages.

3. Fights

Fights are a different kind of roleplay, so they need special rules. Please read this next important section carefully.

a. Avoid fights if possible! There are usually other options besides instantly pulling out a weapon, so try the peaceful options first. Your troll may be violent or you may want to show off your character's skills, but this is a place for character development. This doesn't mean that you are prohibited from playing a mean of provocative character, just know your limits!
b. If you must engage in a fight, please contact the other players privately (PM/chat client) to plan things out. It is good to have an end result and a plan to avoid annoying one-upmanship contests.
c.Follow fighting etiquette: describe your character's actions thoroughly. Avoid godmodding. A good example of roleplaying an action is: “I aim at your character’s face and fire.” It explains the action and gives the other character a chance to respond.
An example of godmodding is: "I stab your character in the jugular vein." You don't have control over the other character's actions.
d. Do not get involved in someone else's fight! There are exceptions, such as if your troll is in a quadrant, or if they are friends with a participant. Trolls generally don't care about other trolls' problems if they don't know them.

4. Romance

Quadrants ARE needed for a troll to avoid culling, but the Café is a public setting. Trolls are shy about their quadrants (seen in canon), so they won't go to a public place just to make out. Relationship progress is important for character development, but sloppy makeouts are not.

*Anything above PG-13 such as fondling, grouping, lewd, sexual, or questionable behavior is forbidden. Take it to a private chat.
*If you bring a character in solely to have make-outs, a moderator may ask you to leave.

5. Problems

Problems will happen, whether they be excessive fights, godmodding, or another player causing drama. If you have a problem with someone, contact them privately and politely, not in the thread.

The mod team will only contact you for legitimate reasons; we aim to create a good RP atmosphere, not to harass individuals.

The mods will try to keep the peace, and if one of them sees a problem involving your character they will send you a polite PM asking for an explanation. Characters will be asked to leave if they cause constant problems, violate the rules, or need revision.

6. Rule Changes

The rules may be changed at any time without notification, so it's wise to check the rules occasionally. Remember the goal is to have fun, so be polite and enjoy yourselves!

Archives

show spoiler

hide spoiler

The First
The Second
The Third
The Fourth
The Fifth
The Sixth
The Seventh
The Eighth
The Ninth
The Tenth
The Eleventh
The Twelfth
The Thirteenth
The Fourteenth
The Fifteenth
The Sixteenth
The Seventeenth
The Eighteenth
The Nineteenth
The Twentieth!
The Twenty-first
The Twenty-second
The Twenty-third
The Twenty-fourth
The Twenty-fifth
The Twenty-sixth
The Twenty-seventh
The Twenty-eighth
The Twenty-ninth
The Thirtieth
The Thirty-first
The Thirty-second
The Thirty-third
The Thirty-fourth
The Thirty-fifth
The Thirty-sixth
The Thirty-seventh
The Thirty-eighth
The Thirty-ninth
The Fortieth!
The Forty-first
The Forty-second
The Forty-third
The Forty-fourth
The Forty-fifth
The Forty-sixth
The Forty-seventh
The Forty-eighth
The Forty-ninth
The Fiftieth
The Fifty-first
The Fifty-second
The Fifty-third
The Fifty-fourth
The Fifty-fifth
The Fifty-sixth
The Fifty-seventh
The Fifty-eighth
The Fifty-ninth
The Sixtieth
The Sixty-First
The Sixty-Second
The Sixty-Third
The Sixty-Fourth
The Sixty-Fifth
The Sixty-Sixth
The Sixty-Seventh
The Sixty-Eighth
The Sixty-Ninth
The Seventieth
The Seventy-First
The Seventy-Second
The Seventy-Third
The Seventy-Fourth
The Seventy-Fifth
The Seventy-Sixth
The Seventy-Seventh
The Seventy-Eighth

The Precursor

[FlyingFrogSlash]

Mellivora doesn't attempt to run. She heals pretty quickly, her skin is tough, and she has had far worse after sparing with Ratal-Dad. After all, what's a broken rib or two? Instead, she moves forward, bringing her own fist to bear, letting him close in, Because combined with his own momentum, Her punch should be hard enough to at least fracture his skull, if not shatter it like a cheap ceramic plate that has just met the floor.



DON'T be so sure mah blue blooded friend~!

[mr_19]

HiCAWp. Nothin wrong with drinking...sure..I never do it...ever...but fuCAW it.

[Tekkenfreak4]

Farlow walks into the Cafe...
Oh shit, Mellivora is here...
He sneaks into a booth, keeping in her blind spot.
He doesn't need a scuffle today...
He stealthily orders a coffee and sips it, hiding in the booth...

[Suds McFuddle]

She smiles.

Well:at least yσ∪'re ∩σt tryi∩g tσ piss me σff.

[Strider]

Well Aureus seems to have by and large ignored Horrin, so he walks over to where Azazel is hiding and crouches down onto the floor, staring straight at him.

((Repost because derp))

[Fexxos Vyront]

Both twins curl in on themselves.
)Ow! Fuck ow fuck...)
(OW!! HAHAHAHAHA!!(

[Moon Redeemer]

The yellowblood doesn't attempt to run, so you head in and twist your fist, throwing it towards her gut. You just notice her throwing a punch at you, but you're not smart enough to dodge. The punch connects, and you hear an uncomfortably loud crunching noise somewhere in your head. But you're determined to throw that punch. GOD DAMMIT WHY WON'T SHE ADMIT HER YELLOWNESS THAT YELLOW BITCH

[Araiss]

Tivona's just looking at Semoce now. He's starting to get drunk, at least she think he is.



OH|Man|Are|You|Starting|To|Hiccup|Now? MAYBE|I|Should|Mix|Up|My|Special|Brew|Again|So|I|C an|Put|You|To|Sleep. YOU|Do|Seem|Like|You're|Starting|To|Get|A|Little|G rumpy.

[Teslamagnetic Integration]

Showtime.


Azazel leaped at Horrin, and snapped forward to bite him in the neck.

[InsanicAsu]

◎ That w0uldn't be very smart 0f me, intenti0nally pissing pe0ple 0ff... ◎
Aevery shakes her head, smiling just a tad.


◎ stop it now, you're not just hurting him you idiot! →
Dei gets his staff out but... well, there's no way he's gonna be able to use it in Yindus's lap.


goddddd why do i even put up with you!?
Des takes something out of his sylladex and like... throws it at Yagvus's head.
shouldn't have even wasted my fucking money on you, asshole.
Wait. You actually got him a present?

[FlyingFrogSlash]

Mellivora Grins as she feels something give beneath her fist, However, there is still that gut shot...She unconciously slides her body down just enough that instead of hitting her gut, the fist would end up making contact with one of her lower ribs. She winced, as the bone absorbed most of the hit, Her lower rib breaking, the one above it cracking. Fortunately she was used to broken ribs. Those healed pretty quickly anyways. She then disengaged, far to busy with her fight to notice Farlow. The tall honey-blood stared at her opponent, wondering just what her fist did to his face.



Fuuuck dat hurts...

[EnigmaticD]

You smile wider.
Thanks for the compliment
Your smooth meter, however, doesn't come anywhere near this swag mofo:

show spoiler

hide spoiler

Repost'd

[Suds McFuddle]

∩σ:it wσ∪ld∩'t:Yσ∪ ca∩ get i∩ a lσt σf fights that way!∩σt that I cσ∪ld∩'t take yσ∪ σr a∩ythi∩g.

[Fexxos Vyront]

The present seems to be enough to snap Yagvus back to reality... He catches it.
)Whew... Are you done abusing the both of us?)
(HEY COOL!!(
He tears open the present to see what's inside.

[Kattily]

Hehehehe... Tivone, he's just heving e little bit of hermless fun. Let him.
And now she's cuddling up to Semoce what.
Isn't thet right, Cawtie?

[Strider]

Due to years of government training his long tenure of fighting and deathmatches, Horrin is able to easily dodge to the side as he turns to wrap his arms around Azazel's neck.

Oh yeah, and for some reason he also has his shades on again. <.<

[Dragoneye47]

You smile. You run your fingertip down his chest.

you Wanna...GO BACk TO MY HIVEstem...?~~

You're not.

[Overlard]

Oh whoops now you're being hugged

-)---- Oh, oh my. Well um I'm glad you like i^!! Um I ah remembered you said you liked msuic so um I jus^ asked some of ^he ^rolls in ^he choir and um yeah...

He hugs her back and then gently steps back from it, lest he get violently ill.

Again.

[InsanicAsu]

◎ Uhhh... haha... sure. ◎
Aevery awkwardly laughs a bit. That wasn't what she meant but she'll go with it.


Dei puts his staff away, frowning.
◎ he seems like it... →
He then goes back to hugging Yindus.


not talking to you, berry blast.
Des flips Yindus the bird and looks down at Yagvus to see his reaction.
It's a tiny knife kit.
Des why did you arm him. What the hell were you thinking.

[mr_19]

He gets himself more beer.
Yeah, caw. Harmless fun.
He puts his arm around kaptey. For standing support.

[EnigmaticD]

That blindsided you.
Well the answer to that is
Ah you see
Don't blush in public.

[Moon Redeemer]

You smirk as you feel your fist connect. You're pretty sure that would have damaged something, at least. You take a step backwards and touch your face, wincing when you feel your forehead. Ah, if that's cracked, that's... well that's really bad.

**,I!could say the same thing... you are... a very worty OP-PON-NENT!!!

... dear god that hurts.

[Teslamagnetic Integration]

Aaaaaaaah his neck is got his neck is got danger danger danger!

Azazel reacts by unhinging his jaw and clamping down on Horrin's right arm, mainly at the elbow, and growling.

[Fexxos Vyront]

)... Oh god...)
(AW!! THAT'S CUTE!! I GOT YOU SOMETHING, TOO!!(
Yagvus, don't... No.
Yagvus pulls a pendant out of his sylladex and chucks it at Des. One one side is a spade. On the other is a dead-kitty face, at it looks like a chat smiley.