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Thread: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I

  1. #1
    An anime guy Araiss's Avatar
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    Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I

    Welcome to the Trollslum Café!


    Our Guiding Principle: We are fans of Homestuck, and of the trolls in particular. We like to make fantrolls, and we love to roleplay them. And so, once upon a time, this thread was created as a place to host new, undeveloped trolls so that players could flesh them out while interacting with other characters. This is the primary purpose of the Café.

    Moderators

    There are moderators to keep quality control of the Café. They will enforce rules, post new threads, and are generally around to help you if you have a problem or a question that needs answering. The current list of mods are..

    Suds McFuddle
    Steev
    Overlard
    Araiss
    Cliff_Racer
    Blank
    Ocfos

    Notice to newer players: We highly encourage you to post a profile in the trollslum thread or in the critique thread before starting your roleplaying experience in the Café. Getting some feedback on your character before you start playing can help you make a better character and avoid some common pitfalls.

    Below are some rules that we would like you to follow when you post in the Café. Please read them carefully, whether you are new or old to the Café!

    1. Characters and Settings

    The Café is located somewhere on Alternia (the troll homeworld populated by the young). Any troll on Alternia can access it. Mutants, aliens, and freaks overall are not accepted. This means no aliens (humans included), abominations, undead, ghosts, robots*, freaks*, and mutants*. General fandom for adult trolls starts at 10 sweeps and older, which means they would be off planet in the fleet or culled for failing to provide genetic material at that age, so trolls over 10 sweeps are strongly discouraged*.

    * <- The above asterisks note exceptions for good cause: if you're sending a troll of this nature in the Café, they must have a good reason to be alive (or still on the planet, in the case of adults). If your character falls into one of these categories, the moderators will ask you to justify the reason for them to be considered an exception to the rules. These exceptions must all be of Trollish origin as this is the Trollslum Cafe. Also a good rule of thumb is that it shouldn't force every single head to turn if they enter the cafe.

    The Café is also set outside of a SGRUB or S***B continuity. No troll knows about any game information or about humans. Aspects and characters from what would be from a SGRUB or S***B session (god tier/S***B powers) are also banned, save them for a session roleplay.

    2. Participating in the Café; Guidelines for Posting

    There are no pre-requisites for joining the Café. Simply jump in and start a conversation with someone who is unoccupied.

    a. Indicate which character you are speaking to if you are starting a conversation. If there is no name, be as specific as possible.
    b. You can quote the previous post to enhance the clarity of responses, but use spoiler tags and do not post quote pyramids. You can be infracted for this.
    c. Before beginning a conversation, make sure the character isn't already talking to someone. Interrupting a one-on-one conversation is rude, though planned interruptions are fine. If they tell you to go away please respect that decision.
    d. When speaking OOC (out-of-character, as yourself) use (( parentheses )) or [[ brackets ]] to indicate OOC speech.
    e. Post containing only OOC chat are prohibited. Go to the Trollslum General Chat Thread or a private medium for that.
    f. Images posted here may consist of only standard sprites or AB (Alterniabound) sprites of your character. Meme/OOC images are forbidden; use common sense.
    g. If you want to roleplay something that isn't allowed (see below), there are other mediums for roleplaying: instant messengers, including the Pesterchum client; typewith.me or sync.in collaborative documents; and private messages.

    3. Fights

    Fights are a different kind of roleplay, so they need special rules. Please read this next important section carefully.

    a. Avoid fights if possible! There are usually other options besides instantly pulling out a weapon, so try the peaceful options first. Your troll may be violent or you may want to show off your character's skills, but this is a place for character development. This doesn't mean that you are prohibited from playing a mean of provocative character, just know your limits!
    b. If you must engage in a fight, please contact the other players privately (PM/chat client) to plan things out. It is good to have an end result and a plan to avoid annoying one-upmanship contests.
    c.Follow fighting etiquette: describe your character's actions thoroughly. Avoid godmodding. A good example of roleplaying an action is: “I aim at your character’s face and fire.” It explains the action and gives the other character a chance to respond.
    An example of godmodding is: "I stab your character in the jugular vein." You don't have control over the other character's actions.
    d. Do not get involved in someone else's fight! There are exceptions, such as if your troll is in a quadrant, or if they are friends with a participant. Trolls generally don't care about other trolls' problems if they don't know them.

    4. Romance

    Quadrants ARE needed for a troll to avoid culling, but the Café is a public setting. Trolls are shy about their quadrants (seen in canon), so they won't go to a public place just to make out. Relationship progress is important for character development, but sloppy makeouts are not.

    *Anything above PG-13 such as fondling, grouping, lewd, sexual, or questionable behavior is forbidden. Take it to a private chat.
    *If you bring a character in solely to have make-outs, a moderator may ask you to leave.

    5. Problems

    Problems will happen, whether they be excessive fights, godmodding, or another player causing drama. If you have a problem with someone, contact them privately and politely, not in the thread.

    The mod team will only contact you for legitimate reasons; we aim to create a good RP atmosphere, not to harass individuals.

    The mods will try to keep the peace, and if one of them sees a problem involving your character they will send you a polite PM asking for an explanation. Characters will be asked to leave if they cause constant problems, violate the rules, or need revision.

    6. Rule Changes

    The rules may be changed at any time without notification, so it's wise to check the rules occasionally. Remember the goal is to have fun, so be polite and enjoy yourselves!

    Archives

    EB Sprite made by Steev, OOC Handle: imaginitiveNarcoleptic

  2. #2
    Nameless One Blank's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I

    ((reposted))



    CIRRIN RUNFAR is still unconscious in his booth with a bloody nose.

    If he's left alone he will recover in maybe a couple of minutes.

    Until then he's just propped up against the chair.
    "Most people lie to themselves to keep sane" ~The Necromancer

  3. #3
    Smooth as sandpaper immortalMemelizer's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    You flinch as he begins yelling, and even jump back a bit when he slams his fist on your table. His anger sends a flicker of fear through you, which mostly vanishes when he begins to calm down. You stare at him angrily for another few moments, then tone down your attitude as well. You stare at the ground for a bit before lifting your eyes to meet his.



    I...I'm sorry. Look, you're right, okay? I was out of line.
    I think...I think I was Projecting some of my Problems onto you.
    That seadweller you gestured to is a bitch who uses and abuses trolls like you and me, alright? It hit a soft sPot. Don't get me wrong, I still think you're a slut, Rancur. But I shouldn't have brought quadrants into this. That's just...my Problem right now. I'm having Problems with mine. Your sluttiness doesn't matter so much when you don't have any. I shouldn't have went off on ya like that.


    Aw, look, you were almost calmed down when Martis decided he'll mess with you. You grit your teeth for a moment, then grab your glass off the table and throw it at him. You scream at him, while tears still run down your cheeks.


    MARTIS YOU PIECE OF SHIT I AM NOT IN THE MOOD FOR YOUR PRADAMN BULLSHIT TONIGHT! GO PAIL YOUR CROSSDRESSING SHITBLOOD MATESPRIT OR DRINK AWAY YOUR PROBLEMS UNTIL YOU CAN COME TO TERMS WITH THE FACT THAT YOU'RE A FUCKING LOSER SCUMBLOOD WHO ONLY THINKS HE'S HOT SHIT WHEN IN REALITY YOU'RE JUST A SCARED LITTLE GRUB WHO WANTS EVERYONE ELSE TO BE DELUDED ENOUGH TO THINK HE'S WORTH SOMETHING!

    Woah, woah, woah, stop. Okay, you're going too far.

    "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here" - Closing Time

  4. #4
    BEEP BEEP WOOF DeoDrew's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    You sip the te-
    It is gone. You set the cup on the table.
    PAY I would love to buy some. How much is it? DEDUCTION.
    --

    You walk in, making your way to a booth.
    You take a seat. On Cirrin.
    You think about how...comfy these new seats are!


  5. #5
    Scourge of Umbrage Teslamagnetic Integration's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    『...!』 Inniss had his camera out, and was recording this.


    This. Is.



    DERICIOUS



    O-Okay...? Teddie just half-waved as Zukuas left, confused and bewildered over what just happened.
    Last edited by Teslamagnetic Integration; 01-02-2012 at 08:04 PM.
    [spoiler]
    OCs:

  6. #6
    Certified Procrastinator ZeronFX's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    Xender is still fiddling with his wire. If one were to walk by him, that one would hear snippets of monologue such as "[COLOR="rgb(223, 223, 0)"]-Almost-[/COLOR]" and "[COLOR="rgb(223, 223, 0)"]-If this thing br3ax on m3 I'm gonna flip out-[/COLOR]"
    The glass is now half full with a cerulean substance.

  7. #7
    But everyone calls me Kavi~! Fexxos Vyront's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    @~ I could sell you a box of loose tea for... 10 tee- I mean... Ceagars?
    No one uses Teeth here, Alice Aillis.
    I'm on pesterchum! kaviCordi is my personal/self insert, and all my trolls' trolltags (See below) can usually be reached at various times as well.
    I can also be reached as an android from outer space! T3 can be pestered at xenologicalDefect.
    Augh don't look. TvvT I'm fixing this.


  8. #8
    emptiness and Chasewithlasers's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I

    @Araiss (ahahaha an hour to answer a few lines SHIT)

    Yeah. She did. She hit the shitter really hard, still needs to get reminded about it a little.

    Vaesia just rolls her eyes, standing up from her chair.

    Yeah. I hit the fuçking shitter. And you're horrible at this çonversation thing. Fuçk you.

    V limps out of the cafe because I have no more time SHIIIT
    tumblr

    trolls

  9. #9

    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    Echo glances over to where Inniss's camera is pointed and smirks.
    that's that's the yellowblood huh huh? my my she's making quite the ruckus ruckus.
    I've just become a lurker, for now.
    Click here for fantrolls

  10. #10
    Scourge of Umbrage Teslamagnetic Integration's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    『These past few days just keep getting better and better!』
    [spoiler]
    OCs:

  11. #11
    Malodorous miscreant. Mister Always's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    aw holey moley, watch it guys! somebody's got a fockin' opinion over here!

    Martis waves his arms in the air like he just doesn't care. Which he doesn't, in fact. He grins the widest, shit-eatingest grin that's ever been seen on Alternia as he closes the small distance between himself and Dolcea. The glass shatters on his right horn, a few splinters of glass landing on his bald cranium.

    He reaches out to pat Dolcea on the cheek, which, all things considered, is a bad idea.

    now now, luv. i didn't think proper ladies like yerself used language like that. i mean, y'had a pretty good fuckin' go at bein' a purpleblood fer a while, high on the chain like y'always wanted, but 'pparently you couldn't handle that, either. so if y'wanna keep up a pretence of some kinda nobility, change yer tone.

    He lights a cigarette with as much casual ease as a man can muster when his hand is half an inch away from Dolcea's teeth.

    though i got t'admit i didn't mind th'reward i got fer liberatin' ya from yer highblood status. now close th' frikkin' dykes, bitch. stop cryin' 'n explain why y'look so fuckin' horrible. th' tied hair is not doin' y'any favours.
    Tijd is giftig.

    The phenomenal achievement that is presented by managing to be completely shit at two languages at once should be admired.

  12. #12
    Nameless One Blank's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    CIRRIN RUNFAR is slowly stirring into the waking world. Very slowly. He moves slightly.

    There is a weight on him. Or maybe thats the ground and there's something on his back. He's still way too out of it to know the difference.
    "Most people lie to themselves to keep sane" ~The Necromancer

  13. #13

    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    hehee hehee finally some action while i'm around around. this this is sooo much better than a movie movie.
    Echo sips his milkshake, treating it as if it were popcorn.
    I've just become a lurker, for now.
    Click here for fantrolls

  14. #14
    BEEP BEEP WOOF DeoDrew's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    You nod, reach into your pocket and take out ten caegars. You set it on the table.
    PAY Thank you very much. DEDUCTION.
    ---

    Hey, is this seat moving?
    You must be slipping off of it. You scoot scoot scoot up into it more. Much better!


  15. #15
    But everyone calls me Kavi~! Fexxos Vyront's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    She slides him an appropriately sized box of tea leaves.
    @~ There you are.
    And the first trade of her new business id complete.
    I'm on pesterchum! kaviCordi is my personal/self insert, and all my trolls' trolltags (See below) can usually be reached at various times as well.
    I can also be reached as an android from outer space! T3 can be pestered at xenologicalDefect.
    Augh don't look. TvvT I'm fixing this.


  16. #16
    You are the pervert. It's you. Krug's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    You found yourself calmed the fuck down, when suddenly it seems you have wound yourself up in the middle of some sort of Kismesis affair between two Lowbloods. Just fucking wonderful, as if this night couldn't in a better direction. You continue to chug your beer, finishing it off.

    While you were about to accept Dolcea's apology and make one of your own. Then more importantly inquire about Rotana, you really don't feel like interrupting baldy here with whatever the fuck he's doing. The guy looks like a fight waiting to happen. Though a smoke would be nice now, you admit that much to yourself as you see him light one up. You instead decide to get another warm beer, and watch.

  17. #17
    Nameless One Blank's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    Such a massive headache, it beats the even the dull ache of CIRRIN RUNFARs eyes. He can barely string a thought together.

    And that thought is: there's something getting comfortable in CIRRIN RUNFARs lap and wait what?

    mrhm hrumh?
    "Most people lie to themselves to keep sane" ~The Necromancer

  18. #18
    BEEP BEEP WOOF DeoDrew's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    Dude, these things vibrate too? This is the best seat ever.
    You lean back in the seat. You might even steal this thing! Oh god
    ---

    You captcha the box. Put under T for TEA LEAVES.
    PAY Thank you. Now what were going to say instead of caegars? DEDUCTION.
    Curiosity killed the Cheshire cat.


  19. #19
    But everyone calls me Kavi~! Fexxos Vyront's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    @~ Oh... nothing.
    Time to start being a touch more selective who you share your broken sanity with.
    No, what killed the Cheshire cat was trying to give Alice a direct warning about the Queen.
    ((I'm a nerd for knowing that. and proud of it))
    I'm on pesterchum! kaviCordi is my personal/self insert, and all my trolls' trolltags (See below) can usually be reached at various times as well.
    I can also be reached as an android from outer space! T3 can be pestered at xenologicalDefect.
    Augh don't look. TvvT I'm fixing this.


  20. #20
    Nameless One Blank's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    That is definitely hair getting all up in CIRRIN RUNFARs face. Where is he? Smells like the beach. Wasn't he at the cafe last?

    Okay, no problem. CIRRIN RUNFAR can get this hair out of the way. But finds he can only really concentrate on one thing. If he could see you would call it tunnel vision.

    With effort he moves his arm up to brush that hair (and any heads it may be attached to) out of his face.
    "Most people lie to themselves to keep sane" ~The Necromancer

  21. #21
    Certified Procrastinator ZeronFX's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    Xender promptly takes out a grubDroid and holds it up to his ear. He nods a couple times, sets down the wire, and labels the glass "[COLOR="rgb(223, 223, 0)"]||| Dump this out and dispos3 of th3 glass. DRINK UND3R NO CIRCUMSTANC3S. |||[/COLOR]"
    He promptly gets up and leaves.
    Last edited by ZeronFX; 01-02-2012 at 08:34 PM.

  22. #22
    Smooth as sandpaper immortalMemelizer's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I



    Ow. His pat on the cheek hurts. And his reminder of your desire to be a highblood stings even more.

    Blueblood, you moron, I wanted to be a blueblood. Not some fishface or clownfuck crazy.

    Using your cast, you attempt to smack Martis' hand with the cigarette away from you. That will clearly end well.

    Get that smoke out of my face, scumblood. I will not close these dykes you son of a bitch, I will cry if I fucking want to! I have had the worst week of my entire life and you're here antagonizing me for it. You really want to know?! Chuckles McMusclefuck's seadweller bitch found out about my little escaPade, and in order to keeP her from issuing a culling order, I'm now emPloyed in the wonderful trade of slavery. She took me back to Chuckles' hive, and decided to leave me there while she did Prada knows what, when Chuckles kindly clued me to his oPinion of the Phrases 'Don't touch me' and 'No means no', and decided to leave me reminders of his oPinion all over my fucking body, if you haven't noticed. I had to tie my hair back with a ribbon my owner gave me as a sign of her ownershiP, and I also hurt everywhere so shut. The. Fuck. UP.

    That...was really more than you wanted to say, especially with Rancur listening in on this conversation. Well, Virrex is out of the loop. Martis already knew some of the situation at least, and if you're being honest with yourself you don't see a reason to leave him out any longer. It'd be a plus if it wiped that stupid grin off his face.

    "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here" - Closing Time

  23. #23
    BEEP BEEP WOOF DeoDrew's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    You look at her skeptically for a moment, than tug on the collar of your shirt, standing.
    PAY Thank you for the tea. I am too uncomfortable in these garments, i must be going. Goodbye, Aillis. DEDUCTION.
    You bow, and leave.
    ---

    You, and your hair, are both kinda brushed out of the way. You jump off him from being so startled.
    Bloop! Hey! When did you get underneath me?! That felt JUST like an arm, miss or mister. Splash!
    You begin poking at whatever was there.


  24. #24
    Scourge of Umbrage Teslamagnetic Integration's Avatar
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    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    『There's only one way this could get any better.』
    [spoiler]
    OCs:

  25. #25

    Re: Trollslum Cafe LXXXI: L<3I


    oh oh? what's what's that that?
    I've just become a lurker, for now.
    Click here for fantrolls

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