Stuck at Home...

[Captain Combusken]

What is this?
This is a Fan Adventure of mine. Its name, as you may be able to see, is Stuck at Home, although it can also be named SaH, Stuck at Home with SBURB 2, or SaHwS2. The adventure follows a boy, Thomas Smith, and his 9 friends as they play SBURB 2, the sequel game to SBURB. The events of the comic start at about the time that the Post Scratch Kids' adventure starts (i.e. three years after the events of Homestuck.)

How did it start?
This actually stemmed form an RP of mine. I created a "SBURB 2", which was basically SBURB but with my "Improvements". The RP failed, but I decided I would make a fancomic out of the idea. I kept my two characters form the RP, and added eight more.

Who are the characters?

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Thomas Smith

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- anvilFist [AF], An' he speaks like a farmer. Meaks frrequent typos *makes *frequent that he always corrects, providin' he sees 'em.
Place of Residence- England, Oxford
Guardian- Robert Smith, Younger Brother.
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- Thomas is a very Cranky and Grumpy individual. He is easily tired by silly antics, even though he often gets up to them himself. He has a strong sense of justice and what is right and wrong, and is a naturally born leader. He is very hotheaded and he had a short fuse. he hates being really angry though. He is quite reckless at times. He gets easily excited over small things as well.
Type- ???/???

Rachel Cary

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- naturalMind [NM]. She is very cheerful and enthusiastic and speaks very properly to thee!
Place of Residence- England, Leeds
Guardian- Mum (Mrs. Cary)
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- Rachel is very enthusiastic and optimistic about things, She is quite under-educated however, and is a little bit thick. She is highly inquisitive and curious, loving exploring and adventuring. She is always quite upbeat about things and finds it hard to sit down and not move, as she is an enormous fidget who is always on the move.
Type- ???/???

Alex Mayson

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- hardyRuffian [HR]. haRD souNDs aRe CaPiTaliseD, oTheRs aRe NoT
Place of Residence- Australia, A Cave Somewhere in the Desert.
Guardian- Torto (A Tortoise that speaks English in an English accent)
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- Alex is a very kind and generous person, always wanting to cheer people up and make them happy. He does get annoyed by people occasionally however, and there are some people who he has given up on. He knows what he wants and though he often strays form his path and has fun along the way, if he decided he's doing something, he does it. Alex is also rather intelligent and he knows a great deal about people, partly because of his wall paintings in his cave that predict the future, and partly because he is a rather good judge of character.
Type- ???/???

Toby Volt

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- brightSpark [BS]. iz quite negative when he typez, and haz zome ztatic in his typing
Place of Residence- England, London.
Guardian- Uncle ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- Toby is a very pessimistic and sad person. He often gets depressed, and it is not an unusual sight to see him crying. When he gets depressed, he tends to get properly depressed, and it takes him at least several hours to recover form it. Even when he's not sad he is quite a serious person. He is also extremely intelligent with an excellent ability for science, particularly Electronics, Robots and Physics. He often feels quite lonely and isolated.
Type- ???/???

Lucy White

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- fireandIce [FI]. SpEaKs WiTh AlTeRnAtInG cApS
Place of Residence- Australia, ???.
Guardian- ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- Lucy is highly bipolar. Her fuse is even shorter than Thomas, and she randomly snaps and turns furiously angry very quickly. Her rage periods, however, tend to be short, and her more happy, optimistic side takes over for the majority of the time. When she is baking or cooking, she is ludicrously happy and kind to every single person she knows. The rest of the time, Lucy is a calm and chilled out chick.
Type- ???/???

??? ???

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- tickTock [TT]. [Tick] Is very formal with her timings, but otherwise, she's quite relaxed. [Tock]
Place of Residence- New Zealand, ???
Guardian- ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- ???
Type- ???/???

Zack ????

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- cruelDeepwaters [CD], also goes by coolDude [CD] and captainDangerous [CD]. (s)peak(s) (l)ik(e) (t)hi(s).
Place of Residence- USA, ???
Guardian- ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- ???
Type- ???/???

????? ?????

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- ???
Place of Residence- USA, ???
Guardian- Uncle ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- ???
Type- ???/???

?????? ??????

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- ???
Place of Residence- USA, ???
Guardian- Uncle ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- ???
Type- ???/???

J???? ??????

Chumhandle and Typing quirk- eagleOre [EO]. `->- To Audience: EO's messages are sent on flights to your brain.
Place of Residence- Australia, ???
Guardian- Uncle ???
Title- ???
Land- ???
Personality- ???
Type- ???/???

Other characters:
greeN [GN]. Begone, peasant. I am far too superior and intellectually advanced for thee.
yelloW [YW]. WOOOOOOOOAAAAAH MAAAAAAN.

What can I do?
Major plot events, characters and all their personalities, titles, lands and everything about them are already completely planned out (unless if I tell you otherwise, in which case you can suggest them), so don't suggest anything of that sort. However, feel free to post normal commands like you see in any fancomic. That's how I keep the ball rolling a lot of the time.

I also plan on having Flash Videos and Games. Therefore I will need people who have some sort of Animator (I don't), or a Game Maker of some sort (Although I am currently trying to get one for myself) and people who can make me some Music. Also, if you want to post some Fan art, I am more than willing to accept it, and, if you're extra good, I might even stick it in the adventures.

Is there a mirror?
Yes, there is now an official mirror, found HERE! I will probably update the mirror before the thread from now on, and there are likely to be less mistakes on the mirror. Consider the mirror the "proper" version, because it has corrections and looks the way it should do.

[Lieutenant Fish]

> Watch a migrane-inducing 5-hour Tuxedo Bull marathon.

[Mibbs]

i cant tell if tuxedo bull is outside a window above the tv or if he is a poster. i hope its the former

[Dalmationer]

>Behold your hero: Dog.

[SkyKat]

Bull: meet with Thomas to make him learn a lesson of life. and. LOOOOVE.

[Naristar]

look at your other two walls

[whimsicalGuru]

>Mooo

[Captain Combusken]

EDIT: The adventure now starts here, to make way for a cleaner opening post.
Anyway, let's go.

Stuck at Home

A boy stands in the room. Today happens to be the day when his whole life gets turned upside down by some AWESOME new game. The game's name is SBURB 2. He stares at you impatiently. Oh yes. He needs you to guess his name.

Enter Name.

The boy stares at you, really angry. No you absolute douche. Try Again.

Try Again.

Thomas Smith

There we go. Much better, thank you.

Thomas: Do the Profile thing.

You have no idea what the hell that means, but you may as well introduce yourself.

Your name is THOMAS, as mentioned. You are 16 YEARS OLD. You are freakishly obsessed with FARMS, and everything to do with them. FARMYARD ANIMALS, FARMYARD MACHINES AND EVEN FARMYARD OBJECTS. You love them all. All of them. You also love PENGUINS, and have made interesting comics based around a Penguin superhero named "SUPENGUIN", who you made up. They're private comics though. You also are a big fan of RAP MUSIC. You love a plethora of Rap songs, and you have MEMORISED THE LYRICS TO THE RAPS. You consider yourself to be a LYRICAL GENIUS. You are also a big POKEMON fan.

You have an intense loathing for BANANAS, and are on a continuous CRUSADE TO RID THE WORLD OF BANANAS. You also hate ALL ITALIAN THINGS, because your brother taunts you DAY and NIGHT about them. You are perpetually CRANKY, but you dislike being RIDICULOUSLY ENRAGED. You also have quite a FIERY temper.

Thomas: Examine other walls

What other walls? It's obvious that you live with only two walls, in the great farmyard countryside!

Thomas: Stop Daydreaming!

SHIT. You're kinda embarrassed. Nobody is meant to see your daydreams. Quick, a solution, this instant!

Examine room you say? Yep, it can be done.

Thomas: Examine Room.

Your other two walls have already been seen. There's only a WARDROBE on the wall with your bed, and a WINDOW. So you just show these two walls.

On the right-hand wall, you have your BOOKCASE and FARMING MEMORABILIA SHELF. There's also ANOTHER WINDOW, but the stupid angles on this 3D image mean it's hidden behind that bookcase. On the left wall hangs your TV, your GAMES CONSOLE and your SHELVES OF DVDS AND VIDEOGAMES. A Pile of STRAW lies in the corner. It's both your BEAN BAG and your RUBBISH BIN. All these old grass blades are remnants from your fetch modus. Under the sheet is your MASTERPIECE, which you will very likely NOT REVEAL ANYTIME SOON.

What next?

Thomas: Behold your hero- Dog.

He's no hero! He's the evil Count Von Canine, an illustrious criminal mastermind who is head of the God Parade, the antagonists in the Tuxedo Bull series, of which you are a fan. Ah, Tuxedo Bull.

Thomas: Watch a migrane-inducing 5-hour Tuxedo Bull marathon.

This poses no challenge to you. You have already done this a total of 456 times in your life so far, and regularly like to watch the whole box-set. You did it just yesterday in fact. You'd rather not do it today.

Besides, your chum is attempting to contact you via Pesterchum.

Thomas: Answer Chum

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-- naturalMind [NM] began pestering anvilFist [AF] --
NM: Why Mr. Smith! What an honour to speak to thee on this fine day!
AF: Yeah, whatever. Howdy an' all.
AF: I am busy with somethin'
NM: Oh my dear good Sir! I hope that it is not thy "Masterpiece" once more!
NM: For that would be truly cataclysmic! 0.o
AF: R-dog, seriously, ya have to stop insultin' my awesowm skills
AF: *awesomke
AF: *awesome
AF: It's kinda a cow actually. Selfis
AF: *Seflish.
AF: I would even say that ya could be called a cow.
NM: That is no way to talk to a lady, Sir! >
-- anvilFist [AF] sighs --
AF: Was this actually meant to be somethin' important?
AF: Or wwre ya just gloatin' yer Posh language.
AF: *were
NM: No, of course not! I was merely inporming thee about my SBURB 2 copy.
NM: It have ordered it! It shall arrive today! 1PM Probably!
AF: Oh, really? Great!
AF: Blinkin' awesome
AF: FUCK YEAH!
AF: Finally no more horsin' around!
AF: No-one chickenin' out o' this.
AF: This has made me fuckin' ecstatic
AF: YEAH!
NM: Always excellent to see thee happy Thomas!
NM: I shall depart!
NM: Far thee well for now!
AF: Bye then.
-- naturalMind [NM] ceased pestering anvilFist [AF] --

Yeah, that was Rachel. She's Ok you guess, but her obsession with Eloquence combined with her extreme enthusiasm gets a little irritating at times.

[Killer-Squirtle]

==> Contact other possible players

[Naristar]

Capuchalog the small farm animal

[HEROLogan]

>Read a grammar manual. Really, you sound like an ignorant hick.

[whimsicalGuru]

>Your pet rat scares the living bejeezus out of you causing you to fall out of your chair as he climbs onto your desk and onto your keyboard.

[Captain Combusken]

Thomas: Answer best bro.

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-- hardyRuffian [HR] began pestering anvilFist [AF] --
HR: Thomas!
AF: A-dog! Greta to see you buddy!
AF: *great
AF: Bro, you won't believe the awesomeness.
HR: of whaT eXaCTly?
AF: Come on man, don't yank my chain, I know that you are fully aware.
AF: With your psychic comics.
HR: yeha, I suPPose I CoulDN'T fool you!
HR: if i ReCall CoRReCTly, TheN RaChel haD CoNTaCTeD you aBouT SBURB 2 aND i am oNliNe aT The same Time as you.
AF: YES BROTHER. YES.
AF: You livin' in Australia is annoyin', I must admit. Although I must enquire as to WHY THE FUCK you have a British accent despite this?
HR: Thomas, we'Ve BeeN ThRouGh This. ToRTo is BRiTish. i ThiNK he BeloNGeD To some KiND of PRime miNisTeR of eNGlaND.
AF: No idea who... I'm not really a Politics fna, if I'm honest.
AF: *fan
HR: yeah i GaTheReD ThaT.
HR: i'm NoT eiTheR, foR oBVious ReasoNs.
AF: Yeha well someone who live sin a cave in a Desert is hardly goin' to be interested in Politics, is he?
AF: *yeah
AF: *lives in
HR: Naile DiT oN The heaD, my DeaR Pal.
AF: Yup.
HR: you suRe showeD ThaT faTC The Nails.
AF: I sure did!
HR: You sTill liViNG iN OXfoRD?
HR: wow i RealiZe i haVeN'T sPoKeN To you iN aGes.
AF: Indeed I am 'n' indeed you haven't.
AF: Oh btw I worte a little rap.
AF: *wrote
HR: you DiD?
HR: oK i SO haVe To heaR This#
AF: Ok so I mixed tow records together like a PRO.
AF: *two
AF: Eye o' the Tiger: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Puw1M...eature=related
HR: AND SuRViVoR By DesTiNy's ChilD : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NorDw...eature=related
AF: Oh you know me to well bro.
AF: Or is that just the comics?
HR: BoTh
AF: Anyway, essentially I got the Eye of the Tiger guitar intro in the background while I rap, an' Survivor at the chorus.
AF: It's weird but it totally works.
AF: The rap goe ssomethin' like this:
AF: *goes soemthin'
AF: I been down, I been up.
AF: But I still am regarded as just a pup
AF: So I'm gonna show these dicks dressed in fancy lace
AF: I'm gonna fuckin put them in their place
AF: I always do when I don't respect
AF: *don't get
AF: Cos otherwise I'd be bloody fecked.
AF: And that is why I rule the land
AF: And why dem dicks always understand
AF: me
HR: ToTally siCK BRo.
HR: some awesomeNess jusT weNT DowN
HR: i'm feeliNG ToTally PumPeD To Go KiCK some massiVe DiCKheaD's BuTT.
HR: all BeCause of ThaT awesoem RaP
HR: *awesome
HR: iT's CoNTaGious
HR: i sweaR
AF: What is?
HR: youR illiTeRaCy
HR: i NeVeR haD aNy TyPiNG PRoBlems BefoRe i meT you oNliNe
AF: lol.
AF: Anyway, it was a blinkin' pleasure to talk to you, bro.
AF: As always.
AF: But J-dog is on my case.
AF: And that cna never be a good thin' to ignore.
HR: i fully aGRee wiTh This.
HR: see ya!
HR: haVe a NiCe Day!
HR: iT'll Be a loNG oNe.
HR: a VeeeeeeeeeRy loNG oNe
-- hardyRuffian [HR] ceased pestering anvilFist [AF] --
AF: What's that meant to mean?

You love speaking to A-dog. He is probably your best friend ever, which is odd considering he lives in Australia and you in England. But you get on like a house on fire. You trust the guy like you trust nobody else.

Thomas: Answer other chum.

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-- eagleOre [EO] began pestering anvilFist [AF] --
EO: `->- to AF: Hey Smith
EO: `->- to AF: Smith wassup.
EO: `->- to AF: Answer me Smith
AF: Ok, ok.
AF: Just had to say goodbye to A-dog! Jegus.
AF: *Jesus.
EO: `->- to AF: Ok.
AF: What do you want?
AF: And why the hell are you ALSO up at this time? I thought Australians were meant to be normal guys who didn't stay up until gone Midnight.
AF: A-dog was weird enough.
EO: `->- to AF: Just wanted to say.
EO: `->- to AF: Today is THE DAY.
EO: `->- to AF: You know.
AF: What?
AF: FUCK.
AF: NO NO NO.
AF: Please no.
EO: `->- to AF: Sorry bro, but YES.
-- eagleOre [EO] ceased pestering anvilFist [AF] --

No. NO. NO! This cannot be happening. No, no no! A short while ago, J-dog, the guy who just contacted you said that sometime soon, your house would be blown up by a meteor. It wouldn't be stopped. He wasn't sure if you'd survive. And that message... well it spoke for itself. You're now seriously shitting yourself.

Well... not seriously. That'd be wrong.

Thomas: Cry out in despair at this awful news, simultaneously Pestering someone else while you do.

While you have a mental breakdown, you decide to ignore J-dog's comments. You see that the third British guy from your little group of online friends is online. May as well sort out SBURB 2 with him.

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-- anvilFist [AF] began pestering brightSpark [BS] --
AF: Yo.
AF: Howdy.
BS: Hello Thomaz. I'm afarid that today iz not a great day to talk to me, becauze once again everything iz going wrong for me.
AF: Ah, right. That's a shame.
BS: Indeed it iz. zo what'z up, why the contacting?
AF: SBURB 2.
AF: I have the game, so does Rachel (soon anyway). We all know that you're the netx most reliable perosn to form this daisy chain, especially seein' as you are also a British resident.
AF: *person
AF: *next
BS: I might have it. But really, what'z the point in it?
BS: It'z juzt a ztupid game.
AF: No i ain;t 'n' you know it.
AF: *it
AF: *ain't
BS: Meh.
BS: I zuppoze I could play it.
AF: Good.
AF: Thanks man.
BS: it'z the leazt i can do.
AF: Good good.
AF: Would you mind contactin' some o' the others when you're not too busy?
BS: no.
BS: i can do that.
BS: who did you have in mind?
AF: I've alreayd contacted Male A-dog
AF: *already
AF: R-dog's alreayd on board.
AF: *already
AF: So: L-dog, A-dog (Female), Z-dog, S-dog, I-dog 'n' J-dog.
BS: yez i zuppoze that could be arranged.
AF: Excellent.
BS: although i am guezzing that you will probably have alreayd contacted zome of them by the time i ztart?
AF: Yep.
AF: Anyway, nice talkin' to you.
BS: it wazn't too bad i guezz.
-- anvilFist [AF] ceased pestering brightSpark [BS] --

This guy confuses you. He's always really negative about everything online, something you don't get. He's normal in real life. You've met him, along with Rachel. The three English guys. Maybe it's something incredibly witty.

Whatever. He's a solid, reliable chap, and you can trust him to do this job for you.

Thomas: Captchalogue toy.

You're bored, so you Captchalogue one of your Sheep Toys just for the hell of it. You kinda fell like showing off your fetch modus anyway. You have the awesome STRAW MODUS. When you captchalogue an item, it turns it into a blade of wheat, straw, wild grass, you have no idea which it resembles more. This slots nicely in your mouth with the one you always have there, and is coloured like the item you've just captchalogued. To release the item, you take the top off the grass blade. Hence why you have a massive pile of multicoloured straw in your room.

Of course, like all modi, it has it's complication.s The massive pile is one. Another is that you can only captchalogue as many items as the amount of straw that will fit into your mouth. The other drawback it that items tend to fly out violently if you remove the grass blade head too quickly.

Thomas: Who the hell is that?

Oh Fuck. not good. it's your Guardian- can he even be called that? He's your YOUNGER BROTHER, and his name is ROBERT. he's a massive pain in the arse, and he loved Italian things. Like CRAZY. And surprise surprise, he's taunting you. AGAIN. The only way these instances are ever resolved is through some good old Familial Strife. Like what's about to occur now.

But first, what weapon should you use? You have three.

Thomas: Examine Strife Specibus.

The Monkey's fist, a decorative knot in the form...of a Monkey's fist, that you can swing around. Or maybe the Club? You only use a Plastic one for Familial Strife, but it still ain't bad. You also have a Pickaxe that A-dog leant you. No, wait a minute. That's right. The card says Pickaxe, but for some stupid glitchy reason, the item is actually a Pitchfork that A-dog gave you.

So, which one do you want?

[Mibbs]

pitchfork

[Laito~Skye]

>Use plastic club. The Plastic Club of Squeeky Noises.

[Naristar]

Monkey Fist!!!

[Sprak]

Man, the only reason he bugs you like this is because you taped Tuxedo Bull over all his Unforetold Connifery import tapes. Stupid Mort and his stupid animes.

[Captain Combusken]

=====>

A few minutes in the future, and a girl looks over her home town. She is always so sad and shocked to see the destruction she apparently wrought.

=====>

At the same time, a boy is doing a spot of archaeology in the desert.

=====>

You rewind back on the girl to find her in her room.

What Insulting name can you come up with now?

Enter Name.

Owch... you weren't expecting such an unhappy look! You feel awful. You quickly type something else.

Try Again.

Yes, that's much better. Rachel, for that is her name, seems much happier now.

What will you do?

Rachel: Examine Room.

Your name is RACHEL. Your are a girl OBSESSED WITH MEDIEVAL things. You sometimes wish YOU WERE A MEDIEVAL PERSON, but then you remember how really awful living conditions were back then and soon abandon these WILD THOUGHTS. You love MEDIEVAL MOVIES. ARTHURIAN LEGENDS are some of your absolute favourites. You are constantly DREAMING about WILD FANTASIES OF WILD ADVENTURES. You rather fancy yourself as an INTREPID EXPLORER or a BRAVE ADVENTURER. You spend most of your time AWAY FROM HOME.
You are also a KEEN SEWER and absolute love MAKING CLOTHES, although most are MEDIEVAL DRESSES. You have become the UNRIVALLED QUEEN of SEWING AND CLOTHES-MAKING, extremely talented in your field. Well, amongst your friends anyway.
You dislike MODERN THINGS, and ONLY USE YOU COMPUTER SPARINGLY because of this. You also have an ANCIENT MOBILE PHONE, but that's it. No other types of technology. You are a BIT OF A SNOB and DISLIKE BEING CALLED A COMMONER. You are also obsessed with CLEANLINESS. You find a clean room gives a DAME LIKE YOU some PEACE OF MIND.

Your chumhandle is naturalMind [NM] and Thou art a rather eloquent speaker with excitement all over the place!

=====>

You now focus your attention on the young man from the desert and rewind his time.

What's his name?

Enter Name.

After Rachel's devastated expression, you attempt to make a complimentary name for this young man.

But he isn't having any of it. He seems rather unhappy. Oh well.

Try Again.

His actual name is Alex Mayson.

Alex: Examine... Cave?

Your name is ALEX, and yes, you live in a CAVE. A cave in the DESERT. A cave with WALL PAINTINGS which show the PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE of EVERY ALIVE PERSON on Earth. You are quite good at PAINTING and DRAWING because of them. This is your FIELD OF EXPERTISE. You SELL THESE pictures in the nearby city FOR MONEY, allowing you all these COOL THINGS in your cave, like your COMPUTER, which you buy large BATTERY PACKS for. You are relentlessly HAPPY, and hate all SAD THINGS. You also hate BEING CALLED ATTRACTIVE (hence your adverse reaction to your initial name) and hate SITTING STILL. You have a passion for ARCHAEOLOGY and have a varied COLLECTION OF STONES of various rock types. Like Rachel you have a PASSION FOR ADVENTURE, and the desert is the IDEAL PLACE FOR THIS. You are constantly CHIPPING AWAY AT ROCKS on these adventures. You need PAGES OF ROCK for your PAINTINGS, because, after all, you can't really use the SAND, can you?

Your chumhandle is hardyRuffian [HR] aND you TyPe haRD aND fasT, leaDiNG to oCCasioNal sPeliGN eRRoRs, whiCh you Do NoT CoRReCT. you also PuMiCe To use RoCK PuNs oCCasioNally Too.

What will you do?

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Note: I need somebody who can use flash and create complex animations and games like Homestuck has. I don't have flash and can't do these things. You help is much appreciated. That's part of the reason why Thomas is on hold currently.

[Lieutenant Fish]

how much amma get payyyyyed to be up on this shit?

[Captain Combusken]

If you're talking about the Flash stuff, absolutely nothing.

[Lieutenant Fish]

Thanks

EDIT: nononono that was a suggestion BB*

*(squirrel waering shades)

[Killer-Squirtle]

Alex: search wall paintings to view your own death

[Captain Combusken]

Alex: Inspect multicultural bed!

Here is your bed. It is nothing more than a simple mattress with a duvet and some pillows, but it suits your needs and you kinda like it as it is. It has various rock names from different countries and languages. You like foreign languages, particularly Latin-based ones and ones that have really complex drawings, like the Japanese language or ancient Greek.

Wait a minute, is that a wet yellow patch on your bed?

=====>

Oh godammit. Stupid Torto. He's the most awesome guardian most of the time, but he's an incontinent! He can't control where and when he goes to the loo! But this has definitely embarrassed you, definitely. You need to quickly figure out a solution to this problem.

Alex: Take a stroll

You decide to go to another part of the cave to distract you from thoughts of incontinence and how oddly yellow an incontinent's urine is. Maybe you'll check your life comic. The one that has your entire life in it. Usually you prefer not to look into the minor details of life and like to live these small details, such as the wet bed, but you feel like taking a little gander at what today will bring can't hurt. Especially seeing as this day is such a massively important one. You're going to start playing SBURB 2, after all. That's sure to be a wacky and interesting view.

Alex: View death on paintings.

You just happen to have stopped at the point in the long string of comic strips that is your life where you die. It seems as if this death is only a temporary one, however, because the comic continues long after this. This death is set for today's date. But this day has probably one of the longest sections on your comic strip. And your friends' ones too. It's clearly going to be a day that extends for a long time, that lots will be crammed into. An action-packed day, one could say. Your death here is your being surprised by a spear being thrown straight at your head. Followed by an ominous large blue hand picking the spear. Future comics don't seem to show this guy. At least not on your one, which you have memorised. You only view your friends' ones form time to time and in short bursts, for respect of their privacy.
Right below your one is a certain Australian friend of yours. He likes aeroplanes.

Alex: Greet your Guardian.

Here is your guardian. He is a Tortoise named Torto. He is able to speak, like, as Thomas always says, Meowth from the Pokemon anime. Thomas sure does like his Pokemon! He speaks with a perfect British accent though, hence why you speak with the same accent. He belonged to an English Prime Minister sometime in the 70s. You have no idea how he made it to Australia. In the desert. You only know that he was the first living creature you remember from childhood. You first saw a human being in real life aged ten.

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-- Torto [TT] began speaking with Alex Mayson [AM] --
TT: YOUr cOmpUtEr, AlEx. It Is mAkIng Odd blEEpY sOUnds. YOU mAY wIsh tO IntErAct wIth thE dEvIcE.
AM: Cool. ThaNKs. i'll Go This iNsTaNT.
AM: By The way.
AM: was iT you who uRiNaTeD oN My BeD? TheRe's a Pale yellow weT PaTCh.
TT: whAt An Odd IdEA!
TT: As A mAttEr Of fAct It wAs nOt.
TT: ArE YOU sUrE thAt YOU wErEn't thE pErpEtrAtOr Of thIs "wEt pAtch"?
AM: PReTTy MuCh CeRTaiN My GooD ChaP!
AM: ThaT Does MaKe Me woNDeR how The hell iT GoT TheRe ThouGh.
AM: aNyway, ThaNKs. i'll Be off!
-- Alex Mayson [AM] ceased speaking with Torto [TT] --

Alex: Chat with Thomas.
You wonder if Torto was telling the truth. If he was, it's certainly odd. You've definitely got over the bed-wetting stage, though it did take you slightly longer than most children on account of having a venerable tortoise as your only guide in how to live your life. Tortoises aren't too particular in their primal instincts as to where they go.



Anyway, Looks like a certain Australian friend of yours is online and is trying to message you. But you will ignore him for now. Thomas is online and frankly, you prefer speaking the him. You love his pissed off quirk. It makes you chuckle.

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-- hardyRuffian [HR] began pestering anvilFist [AF] --
HR: Thomas!
AF: A-dog! Greta to see you buddy!
AF: *great
AF: Bro, you won't believe the awesomeness.
HR: of whaT eXaCTly?
AF: Come on man, don't yank my chain, I know that you are fully aware.
AF: With your psychic comics.
HR: yeha, I suPPose I CoulDN'T fool you!
HR: if i ReCall CoRReCTly, TheN RaChel haD CoNTaCTeD you aBouT SBURB 2 aND i am oNliNe aT The same Time as you.
AF: YES BROTHER. YES.
AF: You livin' in Australia is annoyin', I must admit. Although I must enquire as to WHY THE FUCK you have a British accent despite this?
HR: Thomas, we'Ve BeeN ThRouGh This. ToRTo is BRiTish. i ThiNK he BeloNGeD To some KiND of PRime miNisTeR of eNGlaND.
AF: No idea who... I'm not really a Politics fna, if I'm honest.
AF: *fan
HR: yeah i GaTheReD ThaT.
HR: i'm NoT eiTheR, foR oBVious ReasoNs.
AF: Yeha well someone who live sin a cave in a Desert is hardly goin' to be interested in Politics, is he?
AF: *yeah
AF: *lives in
HR: Naile DiT oN The heaD, my DeaR Pal.
AF: Yup.
HR: you suRe showeD ThaT faTC The Nails.
AF: I sure did!
HR: You sTill liViNG iN OXfoRD?
HR: wow i RealiZe i haVeN'T sPoKeN To you iN aGes.
AF: Indeed I am 'n' indeed you haven't.
AF: Oh btw I worte a little rap.
AF: *wrote
HR: you DiD?
HR: oK i SO haVe To heaR This#
AF: Ok so I mixed tow records together like a PRO.
AF: *two
AF: Eye o' the Tiger: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Puw1M...eature=related
HR: AND SuRViVoR By DesTiNy's ChilD : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NorDw...eature=related
AF: Oh you know me to well bro.
AF: Or is that just the comics?
HR: BoTh
AF: Anyway, essentially I got the Eye of the Tiger guitar intro in the background while I rap, an' Survivor at the chorus.
AF: It's weird but it totally works.
AF: The rap goe ssomethin' like this:
AF: *goes soemthin'
AF: I been down, I been up.
AF: But I still am regarded as just a pup
AF: So I'm gonna show these dicks dressed in fancy lace
AF: I'm gonna fuckin put them in their place
AF: I always do when I don't respect
AF: *don't get
AF: Cos otherwise I'd be bloody fecked.
AF: And that is why I rule the land
AF: And why dem dicks always understand
AF: me
HR: ToTally siCK BRo.
HR: some awesomeNess jusT weNT DowN
HR: i'm feeliNG ToTally PumPeD To Go KiCK some massiVe DiCKheaD's BuTT.
HR: all BeCause of ThaT awesoem RaP
HR: *awesome
HR: iT's CoNTaGious
HR: i sweaR
AF: What is?
HR: youR illiTeRaCy
HR: i NeVeR haD aNy TyPiNG PRoBlems BefoRe i meT you oNliNe
AF: lol.
AF: Anyway, it was a blinkin' pleasure to talk to you, bro.
AF: As always.
AF: But J-dog is on my case.
AF: And that cna never be a good thin' to ignore.
HR: i fully aGRee wiTh This.
HR: see ya!
HR: haVe a NiCe Day!
HR: iT'll Be a loNG oNe.
HR: a VeeeeeeeeeRy loNG oNe
-- hardyRuffian [HR] ceased pestering anvilFist [AF] --

[/COLOR]

Alex: Answer eagleOre [EO].

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-- eagleOre [EO] began pestering hardyRuffian [HR] --
EO: `->- To HR: Hey Mayson
HR: Hello.
HR: how aRe you ToDay?
EO: `->- To HR: I'm good thanks.
EO: `->- To Hr: You?
HR: NoT Too BaD i Guess.
HR: GooD moRNiNG aNyway
EO: `->- To HR: Yep. Although I must say, this is bloody early.
EO: `->- To HR: Spoken to Smith yet?
HR: uh huh
HR: DuDe he sPeaKs To me moRe ofTeN ThaN you of CouRse he'D sPeaK To me BefoRe he's sPoKeN To you
HR: he's my BeTs BRo afTeR all
EO: `->- To HR: Yeah, suppose that's true.
EO: `->- To HR: Listen has White been around?
HR: No
HR: why?
EO: `->- To HR: We need to prepare for today man and you know it.
HR: oh yeha RiGhT
HR: The Day wheN The meTeoRs fall.
HR: of CouRse i alReaDy KNow why They fall aND ThaT we will all suRViVe, iNCluDiNG ouR family memBeRs, BuT you seem DeTeRmieND ThaT you will Die
EO: `->- To HR: Dude! I'm wounded.
EO: `->- To HR: You didn't tell me this?
EO: `->- To HR: Why man?
EO: `->- To HR: I've just told Smith an ominous message involving todya and meteors flaling! He'll go completely INSANE.
HR: TheN leT him.
HR: if i KNow Thomas, aND TRusT me i Do, TheN he will Be woRRieD BuT will maNaGe To DisTRaCT himself.
EO: `->- To HR: Suppose.
EO: `->- To HR: So do you plan on informing me at all about what the hell will happen? What have your paintings told you today?
HR: oh, i ReVieweD my fiRTs DeaTh ToDay
HR: sTuPiD eaRTh assassiN.
HR: he'll Come wheN i leaTs eXPeTC iT aND ThRow a sPeaR aT me
HR: aND i will Die
HR: BuT TheN i'll Come BaKC To life.
HR: sCaRReD
EO: `->- To HR: I thought you said we wouldn't die!
HR: i DiD, DiDN'T i?
HR: well Guess whaT
HR: we all Die aT leaTs oNCe
HR: i DoN'T waNT To looK PasT Those DeaThs
EO: `->- To HR: Who's "we"?
HR: you, me, smiTh, whiTe, CaRy, The ameRiCaNs, TT aND Bs
HR: iT wil haPPeN whilsT we Play sBuRB 2
HR: TheRe aRe eXTRa life sysTems allowiNG us To Die aND Come BaKC To life
HR: so iT's oK
HR: i BelieVe youR DeaTh DoeNs'T Come uNTil laTe
HR: TheN aGaiN, eVeRyThiNG aBouT you Comes laTe
HR: you'Re The laTs oNe iN The Game
EO: `->- To HR: WTF?
EO: `->- To HR: No way
EO: `->- To HR: Fuck
EO: `->- To HR: I've got to be last?
EO: `->- To HR: This sucks
HR: i suPPose you CoulD say iT Does
EO: `->- To HR: Dammit!
EO: `->- To HR: I hate waiting and you know it.
HR: yeha yeha whaTeVeR.
HR: whiTe's oNliNe, i waNT To sPeaK To heR
HR: so Bye
EO: `->- To Hr: Bye I guess then.
-- hardyRuffian [HR] ceased pestering eagleOre [EO] --

[piester]

Alex: Get something sharp to cut the duct tape on your friend's damn present alread-ohwaitwrongalex.
[/weirdselfindulgence]

[Naristar]

go back to being the farm boy!