(IC) WorldMerged: If The Cake Is A Lie, We're All Gonna Die!

[Ario]

Kwardos: Get in the game

As a continuation from earlier...

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WS: []--]Good-for-you>
WS: []--]My-screen-did-not-change-at-all-after-that-installation-sequence>
MM: (@) butt mine..........
MM: (@) did!!!
WS: []--]What-has-changed>

She picks up a sword somehow and waves it around.

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WS: []--]Oh-fuck>
MM: (@) pahahahahahahaha
WS: []--]Put-my-sword-down>
MM: (@) run Kwardos run!!!
WS: []--]Fuckin>

You start running like an imperial drone is after you.
What the hell is this bitch doing?
You try to talk some sense into her VIA your Troll-pad

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WS: []--]Just-put-the-sword-down-gently>
MM: (@) that expreshun on yore fase wus thee best, kwadruss
WS: []--]You-just-wait>
MM: (@) i wish yoo wud mayk it more
WS: []--]You-have-an-insane-mind>
MM: (@) yoo juzt can't figure me owt! yore puny thinkpan kan't handul enything owtside your leetle class systemm
MM: (@) ohhh well
MM: (@) who kaaaares about you're sords
WS: []--]So-can-you-please-put-the-sword-down>

She drops the sword very violently, making it stuck in the ground.

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MM: (@) i'm not interusted with that anymoar, anyways
WS: []--]Just-put-the-sword-down-gently>
WS: []--]And-all-will-be-fine>
MM: (@) look at all this krazy masheen stuff i can put in yore respiteblok!!!
WS: []--]What-machines>

You go to your first floor and find some impressively large machines.

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WS: []--]Oh>
MM: (@) but wat's this? yew half too many shitty sords in the way for the rezt!!
MM: (@) sucks to be yew
MM: (@) becuz i'm getting rid of them!! >
WS: []--]They-are-not-shitty>
WS: []--]They-are-well-crafted>
WS: []--]Honorable>
WS: []--]Weapons>
MM: (@) whaaaatevar

She start flinging swords EVERYWHERE. You swear one just went out the window.

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MM: (@) get out while yoo still kan!!!
WS: []--]No>
WS: []--]Wait>
WS: []--]That-sounded-like-my-lusus>

You go outside...
Your lusus is dead...

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WS: []--]NOOOOO>
MM: (@) i need two make room
WS: []--]MY-LUSUS>
WS: []--]HE-IS-DEAD>
MM: (@) what abou
MM: (@) wooooooops
WS: []--]I-shall-give-him-an-honorable-viking-funeral-tomorrow>
WS: []--]For-now>
WS: []--]A-sword-grave-shall-do>

You take the sword out of him and place it near his body.

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MM: (@) kan't yoo juzt leave him sumwhere lyke a normul troll??
WS: []--]No>
WS: []--]Anyway>
WS: []--]What-do-you-think-those-machines-will-do>
MM: (@) if mai troll died, i'd just leeve him en the dump!! >:|
WS: []--]You-do-not-live-on-a-mountain-obviously>
MM: (@) ahahaha, i ment lusus!!! lyke platybus es ennything liek a troll
MM: (@) all eye heer aur excuses, kwandoor
WS: []--]But-seriously>
WS: []--]What-do-you-think-these-machines-will-do>
MM: (@) eye'm nawt apologizing....
MM: (@) but i didunt exactly meen to keel your lusus!!!!
WS: []--]It-is-alright>
MM: (@) planning is four losers! murder is in the heat of thee mowment
MM: (@) yore lushus iz soe lame he isn't evun worth et
WS: []--]He-could-regrow-his-legs-though>
WS: []--]What-machines-did-you-place-in-my-respiteblock-anyway>
MM: (@) ewww, aul those legs???
WS: []--]Yes>
MM: (@) the names doen't make enny sense! they aurn't even wurth saying
WS: []--]Okay>

You mess around with the machine that has platforms.

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WS: []--]Not-much-to-do-with-this-one>
WS: []--]It-is-only-pedestals-anyway>
MM: (@) yew just aurn't thinking hard enuff, obbviusly!!! >
WS: []--]This-one-with-a-wheel-intrigues-me-though>

You turn the wheel on the thingy.

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WS: []--]hmm>
WS: []--]There-is-something-preventing-it-from-moving-all-the-way-around>
MM: (@) what??? i kudn't heer you ovar the noise of mai lusus being a huge noisy pain en the ass!!!
MM: (@) you half no ideaaaa how noisy it is ovar hear
WS: []--]It-seems-there-is-a-lid-on-this-machine>
WS: []--]Try-dropping-my-lusus-on-it>
WS: []--]He-should-be-big-enough>
MM: (@) she is not usually this bad, eye think she is totally PMSing >
MM: (@) i towtally nailed that

She drops centipedesus on the lid, and it pops off.
WS: []--]It-seems-to-have-worked>
WS: []--]And-a-dark-blue-flashing-ball-came-out>
MM: (@) this korpse is pretty yooseful aftur all!!!
WS: []--]Hmm>
The flashing ball goes towards your lusus...

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WS: []--]Woah>
WS: []--]That-ball>
MM: (@) woaaahh!! look at et goooooo
WS: []--]Consumed-my-lusus>
WS: []--]That>
WS: []--]Is-not-natural>
MM: (@) it's pretty AND it kan eat yore luzuz!
WS: []--]Well>
WS: []--]Let-me-try-spinning-this-wheel-again>

You spin the wheel and a dark blue dowel comes out.

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WS: []--]A-cylinder>
WS: []--]This-is-odd>
MM: (@) it's a madman, run befour its too layte, kowrdose!!
WS: []--]It>
WS: []--]really-isnt-doing-anything>
WS: []--]So-I-guess-it-is-fine>
WS: []--]So-what-should-I-do-with-this-cylinder>
MM: (@) maybe it's a siylent killar?
WS: []--]My-lusus-did-not-do-much>
WS: []--]Except-crawl-around-everywhere>
MM: (@) pfffthahahahahaha
WS: []--]Maybe-this-cylinder-goes-on-the-lathe-like-machine>

You place the dowel... and nothing happens.

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MM: (@) mine fights othar luscii!! so she isunt half as yooseless!!!
MM: (@) did et fit in the sowing mashine???
WS: []--]Yes>
WS: []--]But-nothing-is-happening>
WS: []--]Do-you-have-anything-else-you-can-drop-into-my-hive>
MM: (@) well maybe bekuz yoo don't have this kard
WS: []--]Can-you-give-me-the-card-then>
MM: (@) ask nicely!!! >
MM: (@) just kidding
WS: []--]Can-I-please-have-the-card-Aeviss>

She drops it on your head, being the ornery one she is.
WS: []--]Okay-then>
WS: []--]This-looks-like-it-fits-here>
You place the card in the slot, the machine starts working....

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WS: []--]AGH>
WS: []--]CARVING-SOUNDS>
MM: (@) yore worst feer!!!!
WS: []--]No>
MM: (@) are yoo sure
WS: []--]My-worst-fear-is-someone-else-trying-to-replicate-that-shenanigan-we-did-that-one-time>
MM: (@) it wud no doubt end up evun worse for them
MM: (@) why aur we even still alive???? >
WS: []--]I-dont-know>
MM: (@) shhhhhh!!!!
WS: []--]I-still-cannot-believe-you-did-what-you-did-with-that-jar-of-peanut-butter>
WS: []--]But-anyway>
WS: []--]This>
WS: []--]THING>
MM: (@) we half too keep the alkemist's sekrits safe, numbnuts
WS: []--]Probably-goes-on-that-smaller-pedestal>
WS: []--]Chemist>
WS: []--]But-alright>
MM: (@) otharwise the blood messengers will catch on too the mail eye still have frum the cave!!! >
WS: []--]I-thought-you-burned-that>

You place the carved dowel on the pedestal and it makes a typewriter.

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WS: []--]Cool>
WS: []--]It-made-a-typewriter>
MM: (@) those wur fakes to throw them offe!!!
MM: (@) duhhhhh
WS: []--]Oh>
WS: []--]Okay-then>

You start typing a short poem by one of your favorite authors, B. Eowulf.

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WS: []--]Do-not-worry>
WS: []--]I-am-not-typing-about-that>
WS: []--]I-am-just-typing-a-quick-poem>
MM: (@) why the hell is thar a typritur????
WS: []--]I-do-not-know>
WS: []--]But-I-do-know-they-are-used-for-typing>
MM: (@) this game es exactully my style
MM: (@) look how CHAOTIC this all iz!
WS: []--]yeah>
WS: []--]and-there>
WS: []--]The-poem-is-done>
MM: (@) ughhh, i bet you're suposed two put a sekrit code on it

You recite the poem.
"And so, as the many sweeps passed, the king grew old, but then, he hears of a fire dragon..."
MM: (@) and yoo totally fucked up!!!
You then see an absurdly bright light.

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WS: []--]MY-EYES>
MM: (@) YORE EYES!!
WS: []--]Where-am-I>
WS: []--]And-why-is-it-bright-out>
WS: []--]But-yet>
WS: []--]It-does-not-burn-my-skin>
MM: (@) let me zoom owt

You go outside and see a bunch of varying trees... and sand. lots of sand.

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MM: (@) i half no idea!!! and its awesome >
MM: (@) best game evarrrr
WS: []--]There-are-many-trees>
WS: []--]But-how-is-there-sand>
WS: []--]Instead-of-ground-beneath-them>
MM: (@) this nonsensikal plot is getting evun moar nonsensicall
MM: (@) kick reazun too da curb!!!!
WS: []--]I-was-never-informed-of-a-plot>
MM: (@) that is bekause yew wurn't keeping track

Using your ATTUNED HEARING, you hear someone walking around in your house... It does not sound like a troll... or centipedesus...

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WS: []--]Wait>
WS: []--]Is-there-something-inside-my-house>
WS: []--]Moving>
MM: (@) this es juzt liek my favorite inseptshun
MM: (@) fayvourit movie*
MM: (@) oh no!! plot twist!!!!
MM: (@) go look alreddy

You draw your sword, a very nice cal'dmor, and head inside.

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WS: []--]Foul-creatures!>
WS: []--]You-should-probably-pester-Tyranr>
WS: []--]Especially-if-you-want-to-kill-these-things-on-your-own>
WS: []--]I-can-handle-myself>
MM: (@) ohhh? aur yew shure you kan handul this aloown? >
WS: []--]Yes>
WS: []--]I-am-very-skilled-with-swords>
WS: []--]And-there-are-not-many>
MM: (@) skilled???? whut a liar
WS: []--]If-I-was-not-skilled>
MM: (@) i doen't trust yew at all, nawt to die like a wimp!!
WS: []--]Then-how-is-the-first-one-already-dead>
WS: []--]You-should-leave-me-be>
MM: (@) it kommited suicide, from seeing yur ugly mug, uf course!
MM: (@) don't die, we have a lot more MAYHEM to do, loser >
WS: []--]But-not-that-shenanigan-again>
WS: []--]That-would-be-overkill>
MM: (@) noe way!! i'm nawt doing THAT again, evun if thay begged
WS: []--]Same>
WS: []--]I-guess-I-shall-see-you-later>
MM: (@) soonar then yoo think!!!!!
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] gave up trolling wordySwordsman [WS] at 20:49 --

You suppose this is intriguing.
But you also suppose it is time to be left alone.

[Plush Von Plush]

>Screw the humans, be the emperor again.

You are now once again the emperor, who does NOT appreciate the lack of respect. You should immediately change your form of addressing… yourself? Maybe?

>Be the exile.

You are now the WRETCHED KILLJOY. Or you would be, if the emperor wasn’t flipping his shit right now, about… something. Probably a lack of attention. Wow, you hold nothing but contempt for him. As a former leader yourself, you know how to command people, and he just does NOT have what it takes. He’s intelligent and strong enough, but his arrogance drives people away from him.

Also, you believe that he’s kind of a dick. But it isn’t really your place to judge, so whatever.

>Be the emperor again. Again.

You are now the emperor, and these breaches of protocol are really quite disgraceful. You have to say, in your entire life, you—

>Shut up and keep descending.

Okay smartass, this is NOT acceptable. You CANNOT work in these conditions. All the disrespect is intolerable. You are OUT. So OUT. This game can just kiss your ass. You are not going to sit around and be insulted by some pansy-ass—

>Be attacked by lusus.

OH. SHIT.

SHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT SHE WOKE UP. SHE MOTHERFUCKING WOKE UP. THIS IS NOT GOOD. THOSE GODDAMN IDIOTS FORGOT TO PUT THE DRUGS IN HER FOOD, AND NOW SHE IS PISSED.

Gl’bgolb is such a pain in the ass to have for a lusus. At least she isn’t screaming. She’s just heading slowly towards you, filled with grim purpose. Even though that might actually be way more fucking terrifying.

Okay, think. LOGICALLY. About that.

>Emperor: Think logically.

You start to think logically but stop when it becomes pretty obvious that by the standards of logical thinking, you are pretty much fucked.

Anyways, you pull out your… strife… mod…i… which you realized are still up on the rooftop. Motherfucker. This is NOT a good fucking day. At all.

>Emperor: Ascend very, very quickly.

You pelt up them steps like there is a goddamn giant fucking monster psychic squid thing on your fins. Which there totally is.

When you reach the rooftop, you would like to say that you found a dramatic storm brewing, with awesome thunder in lighting strikes, recovering your weapon only in time to face the magnificent monster who rises dramatically from the entrance behind you.

You would LIKE to say that, but it’s actually pretty much the same thing as before, with the still-dead assassins and the discarded weapon. Plush ,you aren’t entirely sure Gl’bgolb can even go on land. So you decide to take a bit of a breather.

>Emperor: Have breather interrupted.

Your breather is quite rudely interrupted by the giant fucking monster who is trying to kill you. It seems to have figured out that throwing things at you works just as well. So you are now dodging. Dodging for your fucking life.

You have to admit, however, that this is going waaaaaaay better than you thought. I.E, everyone isn’t dead yet. That’s a definite plus.

>Emperor: Lose crown.

You would never lose your crown, even at a time like this! You think you would flip your shit if anyone touched your crown. Seriously. It is a badass crown, made out of pure gold and rubies.

Wait…

Fuck, that sounded a lot like a reason for you to flip out after someone touches your—

>Gl’bgolb: Touch crown.

Of course not, idiot. Tyranr would flip his shit if someone touches that crown. That is a badass crown, you will admit. Not that you care. You hate him. He never plays with you, and tries to drug your food. What a douche.

You just hope that he doesn’t figure out that because of the deepsea pressure, he has super strength and endurance. That combined with his admittedly genius tactical mind is probably not going to be good for you if he figures it out. Luckily the crazy little fuck gets way too worked up in personal combat, and always ends up screwing up, though his subconscious mind saves him time and time again.

…Yeah. After that monologue, you’re feeling fairly worn out about all the description shit you just dumped. So maybe you can just hit the fuckers crown and get this over with.

>Emperor: flip your shit.

OH.

OH IT DID NOT JUST HIT THE CROWN. OH FUCK. IT DID NOT. HIT THE FUCKING CROWN. IT’S SCRATCHED, YOU FUCKER. IT’S FUCKING GOLD. DO YOU KNOW HOW EASY GOLD IS TO FUCKING SCRATCH? APPARENTLY NOT AS YOU JUST DID. YOU DID. LOOK AT THIS SCRATCH. LOOK AT THIS GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING SCRATCH, YOU BITCH-ASS MOTHERFUCKER.

You then proceed to open up a can of sweet whoop-ass on that bitch of a lusus. You could never have accomplished this in a non-rage state. It just couldn’t have happened. You tend to either overthink things or panic. Not this. Just some beatdown applied courtesy of your spiked shield. None of this messing around with four different modi. I mean, what kind of stupid bastard does that? Apart from you, that is.

Anyways, when you go out of your mindlessly psychotic yet appropriately kickass fury, you find yourself holding a spiked shield covered in blood, TYRIAN blood, and a seriously damaged lusus lying on the floor. You’re lucky she passed out before she could groan.

Goddammit. Now you have to go and yell at people for forgetting to drug up her food.

>Emperor: Be someone else.

Yeah yeah yeah whatever. You have shit to do, including cleaning up a dead assassin, making arrangements for a half-dead giant sea monster, and more fucking paperwork. Plus that SGRUB thing. Oh well. No way that thing is the most important thing that can ever happen to you, right?

>…Right.

You know, the respect in this relationship has really gone downhill.

[Ross_Varn]

>Go Up



You head up to the lab, where your lusus sleeps on a pile of scrap fabric, faded by the sun's rays through the open arc of the observation port overhead. Here's where you keep the mainframe nexus for your computer system- the mindhoney matrix is in the very bottom basement level of the tower. You actually let your neighbors use your connection because it's the fastest running one in the area. Although you don't like to admit it, you're a little bit of a tech head.

>The Console



Yeah, this is the thing that you were talking about. It came out of the capsule from the RUINS a while ago. You looked it over- it seemed to be some sort of really primitive tech that tracks objects through space and time. You fixed it up and use to to keep tabs on your acquaintances. Right now it's idling. You never really figured out what that symbol meant, though, and there's a function that never worked on it...

>The Device



You walk over and hook up the grubs to the mainframe, initiating the installation process. They start getting warm and you run a cable from the mainframe to your computer for direct connection.

Well, now that you're comfortable-

>The Journal

What journal? You mean your dream journal?

Or... the other journal?



It's a small one. You keep it in your pocket. There's a sad, sad story within.

It documents the Duelsage's tale of intrigue and battle in the court of the Autocrat, a self-proclaimed emperor from an age and a half ago. She defended his honor and his name amidst his meterotic rise to power that eventually drew the attention of everyone from the Empress of Alternia, to her loyal servant, who promptly came to the Autocrat's side, gaining the name of the Betrayer, to an anarchist who searched for the destruction of all those in power, the Renegade. Another of the court defended the Autocrat in his stead- the Betrayer, who, once a member of the Autocrat's court, fought on both sides of the war in his way.

The last entry of the journal is written in green blood. In it, the Renegade betrays the Betrayer in a quest for the Autocrat's assassination. The Duelsage finds her and kills her, but takes her own life as she did. She signs the journal with the last of her breath, and it signaled a dearth of imagination that prevailed throughout the Empire to today.

All of the Duelsage's writings were banned by the Empire when the Autocrat disappeared and the Empress rose back to power. This, and a few other journals of hers secured by high-stakes campaigns in FLARP, are all that remains of her today.

You know it all by heart.

[Sandvich King]

> Will: Reach the lab


You are now in the Skaianet building. You've been here once or twice before, but this place always gave you the creeps. Well, time to look for the sendification machine. You don't exactly care about getting permission from your mom. If anything, she should be listening to you, at least as far as the "Get home before I play SBURB and we won't die" part goes.

====>


Hey look, there's some science equipment on the counter. The two metal things look kind of like windows or screens. They must have had panes once, but it looks like someone has recently taken the trouble to remove them. The two green box things look like they have outlets on them. Maybe they are some kind of power supply...

> Grab that stuff!


The world's ending, so you might as well salvage this stuff. You'll figure out what the windows do later, but the HUBS will definitely be useful. Remaining on the counter by the panes are a pair of gloves and... Is that a GLOVEKIND Specibus?

====>


You can't let a perfectly good specibus card go to waste. You'll put the LABORATORY GLOVES into it as soon as their captcha-egg cracks, which will be momentarily given their lightness. Oh hey, what's over to your right?

====>


Whoa, is this thing tracking meteors?

Holy crap, it is! This is a view of your state with like a gazillion imminent impact points! Chicago's going to be toast in a few hours at this rate. Only a few meteors have actually landed so far, with the largest red dot being suspiciously over where Tom lives. Or used to live...

You look at the controls and find no way to actually affect the meteors, so that probably means that this machine isn't what is launching them. What it does mean is that even though she's probably not directly responsible for these world-ending space rocks, your mom probably had a hand in the whole operation. You're not exactly sure what to think of this.

You have some business to take care of first anyway. Namely sending a birthday present, possibly investigating a missing egg, and bringing your mom back home before you're crushed by meteors.

[CoffeePerson]

==> expand upon The Gibberish




That's a good joke!!! There is literally NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT. Your ancestor's journal is just too RANDOM for even you. It's written in CODE, you think, but it's all such nonsense that you have taken to calling it The Gibberish. The Renegade was THAT GOOD. Damn, girl!! Even Raeoch couldn't figure it out, and she's nuts for this stuff.

You are sure it was an awesome story full of chaos and anarchy. What you do know, is that your ancestor caused such a mess that TO THIS DAY there's a BAN ON GOLD. You, one day, wish to topple a monarchy as thoroughly as your ancestor did.


==> mess with Calhad



You totally intend to.


> Calhad: Connect



You are now connected. Apparently. You don't see anything different. Frankly you don't know why anyone would get worked up about this game.

==>


A suit of amour becomes animated and starts flailing in your direction!

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MM: (@) holy shet!!!! kalhad, thes gayme makes enanimutt obgects cum to life!!
GH: ---- What is this witchcraft!
GH: ---- Is this thy doing woman?
MM: (@) no!!! i half no idea wut's going on!!!!
GH: ---- My hive hath become haunted!
MM: (@) aye kan see et on mai screan! pahahahaha
MM: (@) run Callhahd run!!!
GH: ---- Things hath come to a pretty pass when a troll must flee in his own hive!
MM: (@) i thouwt yoo were prepared four anything
GH: ---- But no mere mortal weapon can harm incorporeal!
MM: (@) no, you have to fight et! stop trying too b prepared fore things
MM: (@) punch the gohsts, punch them!
MM: (@) there's wun 2 yore rite
GH: ---- Thy can see them truely?
MM: (@) yea!!! i think thats wut mai job es!!! >:D
GH: ---- Be mine eyes and ears then!
MM: (@) eye've got these inveesibul shitbags aul figured out
GH: ---- Did thy see that punch?
GH: ---- Did I smote it?
MM: (@) it's way pissed off naow, you skrewed up
GH: ---- I told thee twas not a good idea anger the spirits!

==>


Everything has suddenly gone dark as the 'poltergeist' engulfs you

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GH: ---- Alas I am undone!
MM: (@) but wat's this? it looks liek you'r giving up!!!
MM: (@) thay got bored & left, wow
MM: (@) whaaaaatevar
MM: (@) i'm not interusted with them anymoar, anyways
GH: ---- Tell no one of this!
GH: ---- If anyone asks I shall say I warded them off with mine mangrit
MM: (@) i might, i mite not!! just keep geh-sing whut i'll dew
MM: (@) sweet mangrit btw!! >;)
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] gave up trolling gallantHidalgo

==> wonder what all that noise is



Meh. You'll check later.


> Calhad: View Greathall


You are now in your great hall, the hall of feasting, the largest room in your hive. You are dismayed to find it filled with junk

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-- gallantHidalgo [GH] began trolling musicalMobocracy [MM]--
GH: ---- Wench!
GH: ---- What are these metal boxes!?
MM: (@) what??? i kudn't heer you ovar the noise of mai lusus being a huge noisy pain en the ass!!!
MM: (@) but yore serving wench hass no idee-yah!
MM: (@) but cheque out all the krazy masheen stuff in thar now
MM: (@) the gowsts are trying 2 mayk a portul to anothur dimension.... en yore hive!!!
GH: ---- These ghosts hide in these metal boxes?
GH: ---- What do they do?
MM: (@) they aur trying tew contact the land uf the ded
MM: (@) weth.....witchkraft!!!!!
MM: (@) butt i bet you kan mess all there planz uhp >:)
MM: (@) interusted??
GH: ---- Say no more!
GH: ---- I shall destroy these demon engines!
GH: ---- I shalt not permit witchcraft in mine own hive!

> Assault Totem lathe


You make a furious charge at the devilish device, slaying it. It stands no chance against your lance, being immobile and unable to fight back. You gain +2 prestige for your valiant efforts.

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MM: (@) that shet es recked! good jawb
MM: (@) but yoo know that thee own-lee way to stop them, is by opening the portul yoreself and telling thee ded to go fukk themselves
GH: ---- What is this madness?
GH: ---- Truely that game was cursed
GH: ---- Worse than those emails that doth bestow ill fortune lest thy send them on
MM: (@) ughhhhh, yore so slow
MM: (@) sow out uf date!!!
MM: (@) just hurrey up und c if the machines have enny banishing spells
MM: (@) puzzle et out, yoo weirdo! >:o

> Aeviss: Deconstruct castle


You delete a part of the hive, regaining 10 BUILD GRIST. This will let you replace the totem lathe Sir Calhad gallantly slew.

Uh oh, looks like that part of the castle was actually needed.

==>


A brave companion gets underfoot of the avalanche of masonry

> Brave Companion: Be not quite dead yet

You live, just barely.

You think you're getting better.

Nope, you're gone. Dead. It's the glue factory for you

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GH: ---- Hark I hear somemthing!
MM: (@) wooooops
GH: ---- What ooops?
MM: (@) you broek their mashean, uf kourse theyre gonna want paybakk!
MM: (@) paybakk en thee form..........

>Aeviss: Bring out your dead

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MM: (@) of a plot tweest!!!!!!!
MM: (@) that wasnt acktually ment to happun
GH: ---- What hath been wrought now?
MM: (@) the ghosts watch waaaaaaaye two much godfathur, that's what
MM: (@) those bahsturds!
GH: ---- The what now?
GH: ---- Ah forget it, to the respiteblock!
MM: (@) oh rite
GH: ---- I am here now
GH: ---- Oh no, dear sweet Umbra!
MM: (@) i don't think thay ment to kill yore loosus, thay were just dicking arownd
MM: (@) et was just a thing thaut happened randumly
MM: (@) planning is four losers! murder is in the heat of thee moment!!!! >:I
GH: ---- Thing do not happen randomly, least of all loyal steeds and companions!
GH: ---- The fates must have a greater plan thy simply cannot comprehend
MM: (@) i meen, look!!!! yore lushus iz soe lame he isnt evun worth culling
MM: (@) nobuddy wood cull in on purpuss, ok????
MM: (@) but sure, beleaf that
MM: (@) make his dehth wurth sumthing!!! figure owt those masheens >:/
GH: ---- He will not hath died in vain!
MM: (@) it's nawt going 2 b easy!
MM: (@) the muh-chine names doen't make enny sense! they aurn't even wurth saying
GH: ---- I need not know their names!
GH: ---- Let us banish some apparitions!

> And later...

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GH: ---- This plan is plainly not working!
GH: ---- I wanted to rid me of these spirits, not summon more of them!
MM: (@) whar's it goeing??? ghost allert! ghost alurt!!
GH: ---- Who art we to call?
MM: (@) somewun hoo can bust aull these spihrits!
MM: (@) ahahahahaha
MM: (@) folloe it yew dumbass
MM: (@) et's towtally getting away
GH: ---- Let it flee!
GH: ---- I am more concerned regarding these metal boxes and the smaller boxes they hath created
MM: (@) wow yoo need two werk on your geomehtree
MM: (@) did yoo notice yew might need sumthing else?
GH: ---- Art thee saying I need to create triangles?
MM: (@) no, nooooo, octo-gahns!
MM: (@) obbviusly yoo aurnt taking thes ghost enfistashun verry seariuslee
GH: ---- Bah I care not for the workings of these contraptions
MM: (@) didunt yoo agree too play rae's game? humph
GH: ---- This is not what I had in mind
GH: ---- Aha wait!
GH: ---- A card of capture with strange holes in it!
MM: (@) the korpse did a thing! krazy
MM: (@) oooh whut is it? i wundur where that came frum
MM: (@) i gess we'll nevar know
GH: ---- Tis a sign!
MM: (@) frum...................god?!?!?! >:o
GH: ---- Mayhaps tis the key to unlocking these infernal machines before the animated remains of my lusus decend upon me!
MM: (@) pshhh, yore lusus es a pussy, nekromansee or not
MM: (@) mine fights othar luscii! so isnt half as yooseless
GH: ---- I ride mine into battle!
GH: ---- Rode I should say
MM: (@) TROUL SLUMZ REPRECENT, BITCH
MM: (@) yeyeahhhh
MM: (@) wait whut were wee doing ahgain
GH: ---- Playing with forces we do not understand
MM: (@) go play weth them sum moar! let's b the ferst to make these bitches neel two the living

> Even more later...

You have gone through the whole alchemy process again and this time instead of PERFECTLY GENERIC OBJECTS you have created a blue door way. It stands straight up in the middle of the room. You've checked both sides of it.

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MM: (@) the pour-tall!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
GH: ---- Verily!
MM: (@) face yore worst feer, night boy
MM: (@) kommune w/ the dead!!
MM: (@) oh and a bunch of yore hive is super trashed
GH: ---- Wilt these phantasms not cease in their seige on my hive?
MM: (@) not ef you doent fuck this up....! >:D
GH: ---- Very well, I shalt enter this portal to who knows where
GH: ---- Tonight we dine in hell!
GH: ---- FORWARD!!!!!

> CHARGE!!!

You rush forward at the gateway. One this side, your hive and the realm of mortals.



On the otherside is also your hive and the realm of motals. Dismayed, you lean against the door while you puzzle out what went wrong in your life

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MM: (@) yoo totaully fucked up
MM: (@) awwww
GH: ---- Tis most queer
GH: ---- I was sure that would work
MM: (@) well as my KAYOS THEORY always says
MM: (@) repeeting the same aktion over and ovur is sure to produce a differunt result!
MM: (@) keep doing that & leht mee zoom owt
GH: ---- That is folly
GH: ---- Doth thee truely want to know what I think of thine chaos theory?

Then, a bright flash. A meteor smashes into the ground where your hive was moments before. If you hadn't been pre-occupied with ghosts that were haunting your castle you might have noticed it and been concerned. Instead you have been completely ignorant of the actual danger you faced.

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MM: (@) i wuz kidding, geeeeez!
MM: (@) ...................................
MM: (@) EN YORE FACE
MM: (@) i half no idea whar you are!! and its awesome >:DDD
GH: ---- Unknown unexplored lands!
MM: (@) looook looek look owtside omg omg yes
GH: ---- Aha!
GH: ---- Another realm!
GH: ---- And His Majesty said there was no where left to conquer
MM: (@) yew aur in the land uf the dead, aul thanks two mai help
MM: (@) best game evarrr
GH: ---- I hath seem some amazing sights in my travels but this is truely astonishing
MM: (@) thars deemons owtside yoor kah-sul! holeyyyy shit
MM: (@) this nonsensikal plot is getting evun moar noncents-ical! kick reazun too da curb!!!!
GH: ---- Get thee gone from my hive!
GH: ---- No troll should hath to suffer univited guests in his castle
MM: (@) kan yoo handul these guys alown?????
MM: (@) don't die liek a wimp, bro
MM: (@) we have a lot moar MAYHEM to dew, lozar!! and this es towtally going to get tyranur's horns en a twist
GH: ---- I care not about His Graces troubles
GH: ---- And I can handle myself against a few demons
MM: (@) i do! i live four them! he forgets hoo i am, thats nawt ok
MM: (@) liek, evun a leetle bit!
MM: (@) soooow tuh-wisted, yoo don't evun know
MM: (@) eye hope hee cries >:)
MM: (@) then aye'll finaw-ley have a reeson to l00k for my goblet 2 drink them owt uff!
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] gave up trolling gallantHidalgo [GH] --

You slay a few imps that have invaded your hive. It feels good to fight something solid instead of invisible ghosts and puppetmasters. But you put clearing out the rest of your hive off for later. First you survey this new realm.

An icy chill blows through the open window that feels like it goes straight through cloth and skin to grab your very bones. You were born into a hot world and think you have a fiery heart to match. This is different. Very different.

"Winter is coming"

[MasterBlade]

===>Accost Dinosaur



You've long since given up on the t-rex. Considering he hasn't already escaped into the wild to eat some unsuspecting passer buyer, he'll show up eventually. Your latest annoyance has been trying to sent Tom the present you made for him. For the oddest reason your sendificator no longer has the coordinates for his house, giving you a 404 error. None of your books on appearification can explain the reason for this to randomly happen. If this keeps up you wont be able to send the gift before it hatches. Then you'll have no idea how to deliver it.

Desperate times call for desperate measures.

-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] began pestering reanimationAnnihilator [RA] at 20:14 --

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AB: Hello Tom. How are the meteors?
RA: Well...
RA: I almsot got killed by a meteor because fo this stupid game.
RA: I got telliported to this weird place that is not earth.
RA: My dead cat is back to life.
RA: And she's tellnig me that there is no way to save earth.
RA: And that it's fucked.
AB: Interesting.
AB: Incidentally, I contacted you cause I cant seem to appearify your gift to your house tomorrow.
AB: Did your uncle put up any new electronics that could be messing with the coordinates?
AB: Its as if your house isnt even on the grid.
RA: YEah well...
RA: Liek I said.
RA: Not on earth.
RA: Romana told me so.
AB: Right, the meteors.
AB: Look, I know you're sad about your cat's death, but this apocalipse ruse is starting to get old.
AB: From both you and Annie.
AB: You cant just hide in a fantasy world and hope it all goes away.
RA: Dude...
RA: Ask will.
RA: He sses this shit too.
AB: Alright, Ill play along.
AB: *Why* are the meteors falling?
RA: Well, romana cat says it's suppsoed to happen.
RA: Or something.
RA: She was pretty fucknig aloof about it.
AB: And your cat told you this? After it died?
RA: IT's a ghost now.
RA: Which is really fucking creepy.
AB: Of course, my mistake.
AB: Wht else did the ghost cat say?
RA: It said something abotu a never ending war between good and evil.
RA: And abotu my destiny or some Bull like that.
AB: I see. And how are you to go about your destiny?
RA: I ahve no clue.
RA: She just told me to buiild up and shit.
RA: And then she was gone.
RA: Thank god too.
RA: My bullets wouldn't kill her.
AB: Is there anything else I should note down before I give you my opinion?
RA: Well, she also told me something about gates...
RA: That I had to build up and shit.
RA: Hurry up and get the god damn game already.
AB: And what do these gates appear as? Locked doors?
RA: I dunno', I checked outside of my house...
RA: And apparently they are these weird shaped...
RA: Things...
RA: Coem on, She didn't really tell me that much.
RA: I still feel like I know jack.
AB: Well I think Ive heard all I need to know.
RA: Alright.
RA: So do you belive me now?
AB: I may be lacking of my studies in psychology, but it sounds like you've gone way off the deep end.
RA: ...
RA: I'm not crazy I'm telling you!
RA: My dead cat keeps on tellnig em the world is gonig to end.
RA: You have to belive me.
RA: Oh who the hell am i kidding.
AB: Look, if there were meteors crashing, why havent I noticed any?
RA: You have stick shoved so far up your ass it's impossible for you to belive me.
RA: Yeah why haven't you noticed?
RA: Have you been checking outside, at all?
AB: I am in a mansion on a hilltop above the most populated city on the eastern coast
AB: If there were any apocalipse meteors heading for civilization, I think I would have-

Out of nowhere, a large crashing sound is heard in the distance. Nibbler flips the fuck out!



And now your laptop is broken. Just lovely. Not only does this mean you wont be sendificating that present, but now you cant finish debunking Tom's hallucinations.



Suddenly, another Boontop appears! It seems like your future self has decided to show you some mercy to your loss. But you're not even allowed to mess with spacetime so frivolously. Its an extreme breach of contract in your equipment's lease. What could be so important that you would...



Oh shit.



-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] began pestering reanimationAnnihilator [RA] at 20:41 --[/color]

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AB: Remind me what the ghost kitty said about the doomsday meteors?
RA: Well, she said they would smash the earth and shit.
RA: Why?
AB: Nothing. Nothing at all.
AB: But did said ghost kitty mention a way to stop them?
AB: A lazer, or some relic...
RA: Ha ha NOPE.
AB: Or some off switch...
RA: She said that there was no way to stop them.
RA: And that it wouldn't matter.
RA: Eath's fucked Dian.
RA: Your fucked.
RA: Unless you play a game with an awesome badass,
AB: ...
RA: A girl who watches too much T.V
RA: And a farmboy.
AB: .....
AB: What was the other option again?
RA: Dying?
RA: Would you rather die Dian?
RA: As much as you piss me off.
AB: OH FINE!
RA: It would suck if you were smashed by a meteor.
AB: But I do it for the rabbits!
RA: Alright sure.
RA: Just get a copy of Sburb.
AB: Fine, Im sure I can find a copy around here somewhere.
RA: Alright.
RA: Just don't get killed.
RA: Ok?
AB: Tell that to the sky.
-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] ceased pestering reanimationAnnihilator [RA] at 20:47 --

[retroScavenger]

>Annie: TOM IS ONLINE! Pester him!



You do so.

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-- briodeNebuliser [BN] began pestering reanimationAnnihilator [RA]
BN: TOM.
BN: ARE YOU OKAY?
RA: Yeah yeah, I'm fine.
RA: Don't worry.
BN: fuck jesus
BN: i thought
BN: i thought i was responsible for a death
BN: meteors and the game and whatnot
RA: Well, apparently there are a shit ton of more meteors everywhere.
RA: Will said so.
BN: oh
BN: wait
BN: did the game cause this?
RA: I have no clue...
BN: well
BN: there was the countdown
RA: All i know is, that I'm trapped in thier weird island, with castles int he distance.
RA: True...
RA: Hey can you still see me?
BN: lemme check
BN: yeeeeeeeeeeah
RA: Alright good.
RA: Well good for you.
RA: You get to see my badassness on your screen.
RA: Bet you couldn't live with out it.
BN: nope
RA: Any way, enough messing around.
RA: What the hell am I supposed to do now?
RA: Save the world from meteors or something?
BN: no
BN: no i dont think you are
BN: actually
BN: i dont even
BN: think
BN: that youre
BN: actually on
BN: earth?
RA: Really?
RA: Well, I mgiht be in the game's world or something.
RA: Fuck if I know...
RA: I didn't get to exploring this place yet.
BN: hey
RA: not that there is anything to explore.
RA: What?
BN: what about that treksprite thing
BN: what happened to it?
RA: Oh that.
RA: Well, it kind fo changed, and now it looks like a rejected Ghost.
BN: ghost?
RA: Not anything that came back to life or anything.
BN: like what kind of ghost
RA: Yeah, that's what it looks like.
BN: like obiwan
BN: or like
BN: casper?
RA: Just, a Ghost, ghost.
RA: Hell if I know.
BN: hm
RA: Casper.
BN: cool
BN: have you tried speaking with it
RA: Obione ghost would be in like, my head and stuff.
RA: Yeah, it doesn't say anything.
BN: oh
BN: look around i guess
BN: look for something important in the world
RA: Alright, I'll check out my room.
BN: a level end or portal to another world or something
RA: Maybe I'll find something there.
RA: Hey...
BN: what?
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] changed their mood to OFFLINE --
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] changed their mood to CHUMMY --
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] changed their mood to OFFLINE --
BN: tom where do you keep going
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] changed their mood to CHUMMY --
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] began pestering briodeNebuliser [BN] at 18:09 --
BN: tom?
RA: Yeah, sorry.
RA: Switched to my computer.
RA: Using the phone was a bitch.
RA: Any way.
BN: what did you find?
RA: Can you toss something into the kernel thingy?
BN: hmm
BN: yeah
RA: Nothing much.
BN: what should i throw
RA: Alright, cool.
BN: anything you want it to become
[RA: I don't really care.
RA: I'm alright with anything.
BN: hmm
BN: how about romana?

RA: Um, whatever.
RA: Wait what the hell am I saying!
RA: Don't do it, stop!
RA: I don't want a zombie cat!
BN: it wont be i dont think
BN: from my knowledge
BN: ghosts are completely different than zombies
RA: No they are not.
RA: They are the same thing!
RA: Don't do it...
BN: tom
RA: Throw something that's not dead already...
RA: Alright like uh...
RA: This...
RA: Pencil.
BN: thats dumb
BN: pencils arent helpful
RA: Yeah, but they aren't undead.
RA: Fine do whatever...
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] prototypes the damn cat. --



RA: Oh fuck...
RA: That thing...
RA: It's Romana but...
RA: S-she's dead...
BN: shit i see it
RA: S-she's not alive....
RA: She looks like a fuckig ghost.
RA: She's undead.
RA: FUCK. BN: try talking to her
RA: A-alright...
RA: I-ill talk to her...
RA: After looking through my house some more.
RA: S-she can wait...
RA: OH FUCK SHE'S APROACHING ME.
BN: just chill mr zombie slayer
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] fires five rounds into romana sprite. --
RA: I-i have to go!
BN: GOD JESUS CALM DOWN
BN: NOOO
-- reanimationAnnihilator [RA] ceased pestering briodeNebuliser [BN] --
BN: JESUS YOU COULD BE CALM AND RATIONAL BUT NOOO
BN: JUST SHOOT THE DAMNED THING

>Annie: Imitate Tom.



BLUH BLUH BLUH ZOMBIES OOP I SHOT MY CAT OOP I SHOT IT AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN.
This is getting so fun! You wish you could imitate Tom EVEN more, but instead, you decide to pester Dian.


-- briodeNebuliser [BN] began pestering aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] --
BN: dian
BN: im telling you
BN: you gotta play
AB: Yes, I know.
AB: And I must apologise for my previous transgression.
BN: youre playing?
AB: You were right and I was... slightly miscalculated.
BN: yay
BN: how did it go with that dinosaur though
AB: But reguardless, I must be prepared for this game.
AB: Exactly what does it purtail?
AB: The dinosaur is currently irrelevant.
AB: Worst comes to worst, the small moon headed for my house will take care of it.
AB: So if you have any slander you wish to throw at me for my ignorence, I am prepared to learn what you know about this game.
BN: hmm
BN: whos going to be your server player?
BN: ill brief them on it
AB: Tom, unfortunately.
BN: unfortunately?
AB: Yes. Unfortunately.
AB: Lets say he isn't my top pick for teams and leave it at that.
BN: hmpppp
BN: okay
BN: next time i talk to him
BN: ill be sure to tell him about it
AB: He's been made aware.
BN: okay
AB: Spoke to him just earlier.
BN: he kinda knows the basics because well
BN: hes already been through the process
BN: welp
BN: ill be off then
BN: seeya later dian
AB: Right.
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] ceased pestering aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] --

[Edo Nagori]

====>

>Tom: Look at Romana cat sprite


====>


>Tom: Open fire!

You open fire on this undead freak of nature, however your bullets faze through it. You are unable to harm this thing.

>Tom: Flip the fuck out

Oh god, Annie was right, Ghosts are different than Zombies. You can't shoot down a freaking ghost! Romana floats towards you, meowing horrifically. This is it, you are so totally dead.

>Tom: Talk to Romanasprite

Spritelog:

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Tom: Oh god don't kill me!
Tom: Just go away!
Romanasprite: Hey, wouls you just listen to be for a second?
Tom: Oh man, just back off already!
Tom: Ugh, the power of Christ compels you!
Romanasprite: Fine keep on doing that.
Romanasprite: Waste my time like that, see if I care.
Romanasprite: I'll just go look for some fresh fish
Tom: wait you eat fish?
Tom: I thought the undead ate human flesh
Romanasprite: Please, eating flesh is SO main stream right now.
Romanasprite: Eating fish is whats under ground.
Tom: Wait your not going to kill me.
Romanasprite: Why would I kill you?
Romanasprite: If you were gone who would fill up my food bowl?
Romanasprite: Besides I think I'm supposed to tell you stuff.
Tom: Wait, you think?
Romanasprite: Yeah, apparently coming back to life as a ghost means I'm supposed to tell you stuff.
Romanasprite: Which is so lame, i'd rather be licking myself and lying down on the rug, but whatever.
Tom: Ok, what are you supposed to tell me?
Tom: Oh your supposed to tell me how to save earth right?
Tom: So what do I do?
Tom: Do I bust in, kicks some butt and stop the meteors from destroying earth or something?
Romanasprite: No, the earth's doomed.
Tom: ...
Tom: ...
Tom: ...
Tom: ...
Tom: ...
Tom: what?
Romanasprite: Oh come on, saving the world is so main stream anyway. Every hero is doing it.
Romanasprite: Not saving it is what's totally underground right now.
Tom: No, I mean ther ehas to be some way to save the earth!
Tom: Like, some sort of off switch or something.
Romanasprite: No way, the world is totally doomed.
Romanasprite: It doesnt really matter any way.
Romanasprite: That planet is pointless.
Tom: What the fuck do you mean pointless?
Tom: This is the world we are talking about here!
Tom: I mean the entire fucking world!
Tom: People's LIVES are at stake.
Romanasprite: No they aren't at stake, they are pretty much screwed no matter what.
Romanasprite: Could you just shut up already?
Romanasprite: I have important stuff to tell you!
Romanasprite: Geeze humans, caring about stuff like planets, how mainstream.
Tom: Alright, fine, what the hell do you want to tell me?
Tom: Hello, any body home?
Romanasprite: Oh sorry, there was a fly on the wall.
Romanasprite: It distracted me
Tom: Whatever!
Tom: Just tell me what the fuck I'm supposed to do!
Romanasprite: Well there is like this war you know.
Romanasprite: Between good and evil .
Romanasprite: Black and white
Romanasprite: Mainstream and underground.
Romanasprite: They are locked in a never ending battle
Romanasprite: However, the black kingdom is supposed to totally win.
Romanasprite: Which is a shame because I kind of like white. It's the color of my fur, and milk!
Tom: Jesus Christ, whatever!
Tom: So what am I supposed to do?
Tom: Stop the white kingdom from losing?
Romanasprite: No, its supposed to fall.
Romanasprite: What you do, is build.
Tom: Build....
Romanasprite: Yes build, up to the gates!
Tom: Then what?
Romanasprite: You see, I'm, like not supposed to tell you.
Romanasprite: That would, like, fall under spoilers territory?
Tom: Spoilers, really?
Tom: Fine you know what?
Tom: Who fucknig cares.
Tom: I'm going to climb up.
Tom: And be the fucking hero, kick this black kingdom's ass.

>Tom: Have a coversation with Dian.
We have already seen this conversation.

[Sandvich King]

> Will: Continue


You head farther to the right. Looks like this is the machine you've been looking for. Looks like it takes latitude/longitude coordinates. Perfect!

> Fire it up!


You already know Tom's address since you were about to mail him a package. Now you just plug that into your phone's map application and get the coordinates. You enter the current time.

Oh yeah. There's nothing but fiery death where Tom's house used to be. Maybe you can send it to the past.

> Rewind


You turn the time dial back a few minutes and his house shows up again. Perfect. Now where to put it?

> To the mailbox!


You zoom in on his mailbox. Looks like Tom left it partly open in his rush to get his SBURB disks. This will make it a bit easier to see what you're doing.

You uncaptchalogue the GREEN BOX, which hatched while you were looking at the meteor screen.

Here goes nothing!

> SENDIFICATE!


Total Success.

====>


You shut off the machine and continue to the right. There was one more thing you were meaning to do. It's a long shot, but you might be able to figure out where Dian's dino egg went during her absence, if these things are as trans-temporal as they seem.

Wait, what the hell is that thing? Some kind of bunny cloning machine?

====>


Looks like the bunny-cloner is set up alongside this APPEARIFIER here. You have no idea why, or what that slimy stuff is for that matter. It's probably not important.

> Investigate


It looks like the appearifier was already given some coordinates. It was focused on this unusually large rabbit, a bit in the past. Wait, maybe that's Dian's house. Your mom does do business with the Martins after all. It sort of makes sense.

You mess with the targeting a little and explore the site. No sign of anyone. Jeez this house is big. That's a lot of stuff. Hey wait, is that another appearifier in one of the rooms? Maybe the egg was stored near it at some point.

> Look down


Sure enough it was right there a few minutes ago. Since you are at an appearifier, you can bring it here for safekeeping and sendificate it to her present self so it can't actually get lost during this time period. This is not in any way a stupid idea.

> APPEARIFY


Total Succ- Hey wait a minute! If you brought the egg here to keep it from getting nabbed, then that means...

====>


IT WAS YOU WHO NABBED IT IN THE FIRST PLACE!

This was in every way a stupid idea.

[retroScavenger]

>Annie: Do exactly what you've been doing for the past three updates.

You do exactly that, sitting at your computer and freakign out over a crazy fucking game and your friends possible demise, as well as the demise of possibly the whole earth. Oh yeah! You ponder why the HELL Tom would shoot that thing after you told him not to hurt it! He has possibly just killed his cat TWICE over! TWICE! How can you be sad about a fucking dead cat that you shot and then reanimate it, only for you to KILL IT AGAIN? You're getting overworked. Everything's fine... You're sure that the ghost thing is definitely not part of the physical plane.

Oh look, Tom is pestering you!

-- reanimationAnnhilator [RA] began pestering briodeNebuliser [BN] --
RA: Hey
RA: I'm back.
BN: tom
RA: And not freaking out.
BN: what the fuck was that back there
BN: im almost 67 percent sure that i told you not to fucking freak out
BN: thats not a lot but i mean im more than halfway sure
RA: Well sorry!
RA: I'm over it now.
RA: So it doesn't really matter.
BN: okay
RA: And I just talked to Dian and shit.
BN: oh
RA: She's playing the game too.
BN: yeah she told me
RA: For some reason.
BN: yeah yeah
BN: hey
RA: What is it?
BN: most videogame levels have an end to the level right? a portal a gate castle? something like that
RA: Yeah, Romana cat told me about that.
RA: Apparently there is a gate above my house.
RA: And we have to build up to it.
RA: Oh fuck almsot forgot.
RA: Did you know.
RA: That earth is fucked?
RA: We can't save it.
RA: Ever.
BN: oh
BN: thats
BN:
BN: wow
BN: hmm
BN: not sure how to respond to that
RA: Yeah...
RA: Just think it over for a bit I guess...
RA: Try to get into where ever it is I am.
RA: But first...
RA: You have to build up and stuff...
RA: What that means I have NO idea.
RA: Romana was weird about that.
BN: hmm
BN: i think i got this yo
BN: i can build you up
BN: but i need grist and shit
RA: Grist?
RA: What's that?
RA: Like.
RA: Building material or something?
RA: Maybe.
RA: I dunno'.
BN: i think its a currency or something
BN: idk
RA: Alright...
RA: Could you try building something righ tnow?
BN: no not yet
RA: Alright.
RA: Just don't fuck anything up.
BN: okay
BN: could you go downstairs
RA: Yeah sure, Annie.
RA: Why not.
BN: okay cool
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] checked downstairs. --
RA: Yeah, totally, not gonig to be distracted by any more supernatural creatures.
RA: Nope, not at all!
RA: Any way, did you deploy anything yet?
BN: nope i still cant gather up any grist or shale






BN: living room
BN: go there
RA: Alright, let's do this shit then....
RA: Wait...
RA: Fuck.
RA: I swear I heard something...
BN: probably not an undead creature
RA: What?
RA: What's in the living room?
BN: nothing i dont see anything go check out the living room
BN: go
BN: just slowly make your way down there and dont shoot anything
RA: Annie, I'm starting to freak out over here...
BN: JUST GO AND DONT SHOOT ANYTHING




RA: again...
BN: ITS OKAY THERE IS NOTHING UNDEAD
BN: IF THERE WAS I WOULD TELL YOU
RA: Alright.
RA: Checknig it out...
RA: I don't see anything either.
BN: good
-- reanimationAnnhilator [RA] slowly walks into the living room and sees nothing. --
RA: Oh man...
BN: oh man what?
RA: I wsa worried that there was ACTUALLY something there.
BN: pfft
BN: pfffffffft
BN: do you think i would lie to you
BN: oh dear god tom
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] ceased pestering reanimationAnnhilator [RA] --

>Annie: GFADGSGHDSFHADFSOHJDFHSD!!!

What the hell? AGAIN? Hopefully he tries to actually REASON with this thing instead of SHOOTING it this time! But you don't know... that thing looks a little bit more evil than an adorable hipster catghost.

[MasterBlade]

====>Dian: Pester Will

show spoiler

hide spoiler

-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] began pestering rusticRaptor [RR] at 00:06 --
AB: Hey Will, did you ever get to your mother's lab?
RR: Yeah
AB: And did you happen to find her appearifier unit?
RR: Well it was the sendificator I was looking for
RR: But yeah I found that too...
RR: Why?
AB: One does not use a sendifier without tampering with the appearifier.
AB: Did you happen to mess with it by chance?
RR: I did a little with it.
RR: Nothing worth saying...
AB: Good. I need you to appearify something from my house and sendificate it to me.
RR: What would that be?
AB: A copy of Sburb hidden deep within the estate's ruins.
AB: Do you need me to send you the coordinates?
RR: Sburb? In the ruins?
RR: Why would that be there?
AB: Yes... there's a story with that.
AB: It involved Sir Game Maker giving me a copy of the game when he had finished it.
AB: He was quite insistant of me keeping it.
AB: Every time I threw it out it would be on my desk the next morning.
AB: i eventually disposed of it in the deepest darkest ruins of the temple so he would never find it ever.
AB: And now I need you to find it.
RR: okay......

show spoiler

hide spoiler

RR: You can't just retrace your steps?
AB: Well you are at an appearifier.
RR: The targeting system on this thing is a bit annoying.
RR: But it does navigate through walls
RR: and through time...
RR: Oh hey that gave me an idea
AB: Well it wouldn't be an appearifier if it could appearify from the moment
RR: When did you hide it
AB: It would be a teleporter
RR: I can track you at the time you originally hid it and find it that way.
RR: When DID you hide it?
AB: Umm, about 1 month, 29 days exactly.
RR: Okay
RR: Time of day?
AB: 7:27 PM
RR: Gotcha.
RR: Let's see
RR: Okay, so I have the appearifier set to that time.
AB: Great! What do you see?
RR: I see rabbits around. Not unusual...
AB: What else?
RR: A giant green structure.
RR: Hang on. I gotta adjust the view.
AB: And your mother?
RR: I don't see her.
RR: Not on the screen or IRL for that matter.
AB: Hmm, odd for her not to be in her own lab.
RR: Oh hey. And there you are.
AB: Me?
AB: Wait... what are you doing locked onto my house?
RR: wait
RR: Yeah that's you.
RR: I dunno
RR: I didn't reset the coordinates
AB: And what were its coordinates?
RR: It must have been showing your house from the start.
RR: uh
AB: Did anything from my lab end up in yours?
RR: 42.309, -71.340, Elevation 0288.
RR: Umm
AB: Anything... important?
RR: Well, there's a machine next to the appearifier containing some slime.
RR: And a weird rabbit clone thing.
AB: I KNEW IT!
RR: The machine was originally pointing at one of the bunnies.
AB: ALL THIS TIME I THOUGHT IT WAS MISSING
AB: But it didn't just walk away, did it?
RR: The origianl rabbit?
AB: No, MY EXPERIMENT
RR: The dino egg?
AB: What? Heck no, my giant bunnies!
AB: That explains the slime, the coordinates, the past setting,]
AB: Your mother's been stealing my research all this time! I Knew it!
RR: Yeah the rabbit. That's what I asked the first time.
AB: ...why would you bring up the dino egg?
AB: Nevermind, not important now.
RR: You said your experiment.
RR: But as far as the rabbit...
RR: Yeah the rabbit did just walk away after I stopped pointing at it.
RR: All that's on my end is slime and some creepy fetus clone thing.
RR: If you're missing one, I don't see a whole rabbit on my end.
RR: Sorry.
AB: Shame. I know he must be somewhere.
AB: Reguardless, can you get those disks from the temple?

show spoiler

hide spoiler

RR: Okay
RR: I see you entering the ruins.
RR: Following...
RR: Wait...
RR: Umm...
AB: Umm...?
RR: I can't see shit.
RR: I followed you into the ruins and my screen blacked out.
AB: Damnit! What is wrong with that place?
AB: Every time I try to appearify something inside it gets lost by my appearifier.
RR: It didn't just fade because the ruins are dark either. It just straight-up blacked out when I focused on this place.
AB: And now yours is blacking out too.
AB: Did Sir Dimwit really build his house around that damn thing just to spite me?
RR: Hell if I know.
AB: Meaning Im going to have to go the long way.
AB: I was hoping I wouldnt have to make the trip.
RR: Well, good luck with that then.
RR: And wait. This means you're playing with us for sure, right?
RR: If you find the disks?
AB: Suprisingly I found the one thing I hate more than playing games with Tom.
AB: Playing them with meteors.
-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] ceased pestering rusticRaptor [RR] at 00:43 --



-- rusticRaptor [RR] began pestering aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] at 00:50 --
RR: Hey
RR: I wasn't finished.
RR: You didn't answer me.
AB: Yes I am playing your game with you.
RR: Or even say goodbye.
AB: That was what the metaphor was implying
RR: Well I was in the middle of typing that I hate this idea of a game sending meteors too.
RR: I hate the idea of ANYTHING sending meteors for that matter :/
AB: And in that we have a common interest.
-- aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] ceased pestering rusticRaptor [RR] at 00:52 --
RR: But anyway, you should really not end your conversations like that.
RR: Hey!
RR: You know how to say goodbye right?
RR: Dammit
-- rusticRaptor [RR] ceased pestering aphoristicBloodbanker [AB] at 00:53 --

====>Enter temple



Wrong Temple Dunkass


====>Enter anyways



Meanwhile, in another frog temple...



A tyrant plans his conquest.

[Sandvich King]

> Will: Deal with your predicament


Man that was close. You almost slipped up and told Dian about you taking the egg. Maybe there's still time to fix this. If you sendificate it back to her in the present, it'll be in her room when she's done exploring. And it will be like nothing happened. This is not in any way a stupid plan. You captchalogue the egg. You are loading up on an awful lot of stuff, but at least your sylladex can hold a dozen eggs... Egg cards? Card Eggs? Whatever. Hey wait, was it a good idea to captchalogue that? Besides the word EGGCEPTION that is now bouncing around inside your head, that means you'll have to wait a few minutes to retrieve it. Well, you've got time. It's not like you're under attack by space rocks. Oh wait... Shit...

> Will: Examine rightward


You take a brief moment to check out the last odd device in the room. It's some platform with another kind of those triangley designs. No controls on this one, just a label of TPTL_02. It seems like all the devices in here are labeled. Your mom sure is organized. What does the 02 mean anyway? Does this represent Skaianet's secondary laboratory or something? Where's site 01? You don't have time to keep pondering this. Time to head to the sendificator.

====>


As soon as you get this returned, you plan on heading straight home with your mom, grabbing your SBURB disks from the kitchen table, and starting the game with Annie. She can fill you in on the workings of the game later.

====>


Alright. Time to get this thi-

====>


Oh shit it's your MOM. You both know you're not supposed to be in here without her permission.

Well, it looks like it's time for!!!

You to be someone else...

[Ario]

>Be Kwardos
You are now Kwardos.
These things are pretty easy to kill, but then again, they're against your swords.

It looks like Rae's pestering you, so you answer VIA troll-pad.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

-- rangarokValiant [RV] began trolling wordySwordsman [WS] at 15:32 --
WS: []--]Hello-Rae>
RV: hey rσg
RV: yσu geτ my pαckαge yeτ?
WS: []--]It-is-Ron-if-you-are-referring-to-my-first-name>
WS: []--]and-yes-I-did.>
RV: σh well, yσu knσw me αnd nαmes
WS: []--]I-know>
WS: []--]Rog-is-very-close-though>
RV: yeαh, well, dιd yσu ιnsταll ιτ yeτ?
RV: we're hσpefully gσιng τσ geτ sταrτed αs α grσup ατ sσme pσιnτ
WS: []--]Yes-I-have>
WS: []--]Infact>
RV: σk gσσd
WS: []--]I-am-playing-right-now>
RV: sσ I fιgured τhατ I'd send yσu τhe cσnnecτισn chαιn-
RV: wαιτ
RV: whατ
WS: []--]I-am-playing-with>
WS: []--]Aeviss>
RV: yσu cαn'τ- hσw dιd yσu-
WS: []--]BLUH>
WS: []--]As-my-server>
RV: ...
WS: []--]How-did-I-what>
RV: I hσnesτly hαve nσ ιdeα hσw τσ reαcτ τσ τhιs
WS: []--]Hmm>
WS: []--]Did-I-jump-the-gun>
RV: besιdes deleτιng τhιs dσcumenτ wιτh αll τhe plστταge ιnfσrmατισn σn ιτ fσr us
RV: α lιττle bιτ
WS: []--]I-am-sorry-for-that>
WS: []--]Wait-what-document>
RV: buτ τhατ's jusτ fιne. we'll fιgure ιτ σuτ ι'm sure.
RV: sσ lσng αs αevιss dσsen'τ geτ bσred σr yσu fιnιsh τhe gαme σr sσmeτhιng
WS: []--]I-think-Aeviss-wanted-to-connect-to-Tyranr>
RV: σh, jusτ τhe σne I wαs gσιng τσ use τσ τrαck τhe cσnnecτισn sτuff, ιτ's α lιττle cσmplex
WS: []--]I-dont-think-this-game-can-be-completed-with-just-one-person>
RV: buτ I guess ιτ's α bιτ pσιnτless ατ τhιs pσιnτ
RV: hσw's ιτ gσιng τhen?
WS: []--]Meh>
WS: []--]There-are-these-things-everywhere>
WS: []--]Evil-things>
WS: []--]Or-at-least-things-that-tried-to-kill-me>
RV: well, ιτ ιs αn αdvenτure gαme. I'd τhιnk τhey'd be bαsιc-level enemιes, rιghτ?
WS: []--]True>
RV: τσ be hσnesτ I dσn'τ knσw much αbσuτ τhιs besιdes whατ I've gατhered-
RV: er
RV: elsewhere
WS: []--]I-need-an-idea-for-something-to-throw-into-my-lusus>
WS: []--]He-got-turned-into-a-spectre-like-thing>
RV: yσu
RV: I
RV: whατ
WS: []--]And-I-think-he-needs-a-second-item>
RV: whατ wαs τhατ αbσuτ yσur lusus
WS: []--]I-need-to-explain-a-bit>
WS: []--]dont-I>
RV: ...ιτ lσσks lιke τhατ wσuld be τhe besτ beτ
RV: yes
WS: []--]Okay>
WS: []--]When-I-entered-the-game>
WS: []--]Aeviss-placed-machines-in-a-big-room-in-my-hive>
WS: []--]And-to-make-room>
WS: []--]She-threw-my-swords-EVERYWHERE>
WS: []--]One-of-them-went-outside-and-killed-centipedesus>
RV: yσu knσw hσw I sαιd I hαd nσ ιdeα hσw τσ reαcτ τσ τhατ τhιng yσu sαιd eαrlιer
RV: sτrιke τhατ
RV: WHAT
RV: whατ αre yσu ταlkιng αbσuτ
RV: dιd ιτ remαp yσur hιve ιnτσ τhe gαme σr sσmeτhιng
WS: []--]It-took-my-hive-into-the-game.>
WS: []--]I-am-using-my-tablet-to-speak-to-you>
RV: ...
RV: whατ
RV: τhe
RV: fuck
RV: dιd I geτ yσu guys ιnτσ
WS: []--]I-dont-know>
WS: []--]But-hey>
WS: []--]It-works-for-anger-release>
WS: []--]My-swords-are-being-used-to-the-fullest-extent>
RV: σk
RV: sσ
RV: τhe gαme wenτ αnd pulled yσu ιnτσ ιτself
RV: αevιss ιs busy wσrkιng σn τhe meτα mechαnιcs σf τhe gαme
WS: []--]Then-there-was-this-flashing-floating-ball-and-it-took-the-form-of-centipedesus>
RV: whιle yσu... τry αnd beατ ιτ frσm wιτhιn σr sσmeτhιng?
RV: τhιs ιs τσταlly nστ whατ I wαs expecτιng
RV: ιf αnyτhιng
WS: []--]I-think-you-have-to>
WS: []--]We-arent-just-playing-a-game>
WS: []--]We-ARE-PART-OF-the-game>
WS: []--]This-is-crazy>
WS: []--]but-sweet>
WS: []--]Anyway>
WS: []--]Do-you-have-an-idea-for-something-to-give-to-centipedesus>
WS: []--]He-needs-to-defend-himself-somehow>
RV: um
RV: ...yσu shσuld gιve ιτ yσur fιcτισn fσlder
RV: er
RV: he
RV: he'll be αble τσ αssume τhe fσrm σf σne σf yσur self-ιnserτs :V
WS: []--]Hmm>
WS: []--]He-might-look-really-badass-then>
WS: []--]Okay>

You throw the journal containing profiles of your characters.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

WS: []--]oh>
WS: []--]my>
WS: []--]gog>
RV: ...whατ nσw
WS: []--]He-turned-into-my-version-of-him>
WS: []--]meaning-now-he-his-legs>
WS: []--]turned-into-swords>
RV: pffτ
WS: []--]You-have-to-admit>
RV: αssumιng whσever cσnnecτs τσ me dσesn'τ screw up σr fαll αsleep σr sσmeτhιng
RV: I'll hαve τσ τype my Cσdex
WS: []--]Having-swords-for-legs-would-be-awesome>
WS: []--]I-think-I-have-to-connect-to-you>
WS: []--]If-you-bring-Tyranr-in>
WS: []--]Which-I-think-is-where-the-connection-sequence-is-going>
RV: Rιghτ, αnd Tyr wσuld dσ Aevιss
RV: I guess we'll plαn σn τhατ fσr nσw, unless sσmeτhιng else cσmes up
WS: []--]Hah>
WS: []--]Like-anything-else-would-come-up>
WS: []--]I-think-your-only-worry-is>
WS: []--]->
WS: []--]->
WS: []--]I-cant-think-of-one>
RV: sure, I cαn
RV: everyσne's huskτσp explσdes
RV: gστ τσ geτ creατιve mαn
WS: []--]You-and-your-odd-fantasies>
WS: []--]Also-I-am-not-on-alternia-anymore>
WS: []--]I-know-this-because-I-can-go-into-sunlight-and-not-get-horribly-burned>
WS: []--]It-is-pretty-nice-if-you-get-used-to-it>
RV: Huh
RV: whατ dσes ιτ lσσk lιke, τhen?
WS: []--]Lots-of-sand>
WS: []--]and-trees>
WS: []--]but-mostly-sand>
RV: yσu shσuld send me α pιcτure
RV: ιn beτween nστ dyιng, I guess
WS: []--]Maybe>
WS: []--]If-I-can-find-my-camera>
RV: well, gσσd luck. I suppσse I'll τry τσ fιgure σuτ whατ Tyr's up τσ, sσ we cαn fιnιsh τhe gαme σr sσmeτhιng
WS: []--]I-do-not-think-this-game-will-be-finished-for-a-while>
WS: []--]Centipedesus-says-so>
RV: greατ
RV: we'll see αbσuτ τhατ
WS: []--]Challenge-accepted>
RV: σnce Tyrαnr decιdes "SCREW THIS, WHERE'S THE FINAL BOSS"
RV: αnd we αll chαse αfτer hιm
RV: αs usuαl
WS: []--]Pretty-much>
WS: []--]Welp>
WS: []--]I-have-to-go-kill-things>
WS: []--]I-shall-see-you-soon>
WS: []--]I-hope>
WS: []--]You-are-the-most-sane-of-our-friends-to-talk-to>
WS: []--]Rae>
RV: I τry
RV: serισusly I dσ :V
WS: []--]I-know>
RV: ταlk τσ yσu lατer
-- rangarokValiant [RV] gave up trolling wordySwordsman [WS] at 16:00 --

Well, that was eventful.
It looks like centipedesus can kill imps with ease, now...
You got some cleaning to do. With swords.
Maybe you should be someone else?

[Sandvich King]

> Will: Now where were you?


Right then time for...

> STRIFE!


> AGGRIEVE


====>


> Meanwhile...


An unusually large rabbit transportalizes from its home mansion into a mysterious lab.

> Will: ABJURE


Your mom proceeds to scold you about lab safety and being where you are not allowed.

====>


You proceed to tell her that you were doing something important and not dangerous. Also that there are world-ending meteors outside and that you both need to return home as soon as possible.

====>


It doesn't even seem like she's listening. What could possibly be more important than-

====>


Oh god something bit you!

====>


Ummm...

> ABSCOND


No clue about the bunny sorry for messing around get home soon watch for meteors bye!

Screw the dinosaur egg. You're done with this crazy bullshit.

====>


You make your way home. You hope your mom is going to follow. If not she'll be toast.

[Edo Nagori]

> Tom: Get attacked from behind!

As you are talking about important shit with annie, you are suddenly struck from behind! You are pushed into a wall, loosening the "sting" sword on the wall.

>Tom: Inspect creature.

You decide to see exactly what attacked you. You find an evil monster wearing a star Trek uniform? That's pretty... Odd...

>Tom: No thinking shoot!

That is right, you're stupid thoughts are getting in your way of what's important, shooting the fuck out of this thing. You unload two bullets into it, killing it instantly.

>Tom: Celebrate

Oh yeah, you just killed your first evil monster. This is so sweet. You have tell Annie and Will about this one, they'll FREAK! You pull out your phone to-

==>

Sting can't support itself anymore. It falls off of the wall, and the hilt hits your head. You pass out.

>Tom: Climb echeladder


You climb to the rung of "Sharpshoot starter", and earn 130 boondollars.

>Sting: Level up.

Sting has reached the highest rung "Slayer slayer" and it has earned all of the boondollars and grist.

[Sandvich King]

> Will: Return


You manage to make it home in one piece. It's not like any meteors were coming RIGHT at you or something. At least not yet...

====>


Immediately after entering your house, you head to the KITCHEN. As expected, your SBURB DISKS are on the counter. Its a good thing you didn't have to go on any sort of crazy runaround to retrieve them.

====>


As you captchalogue the disks, you take a moment to examine the status of your sylladex. The first slot, which used to contain the GREEN PACKAGE, now contains the DINOSAUR EGG. You're not quite sure if that's the egg itself or just a really slow captcha egg containing it. The next two slots contain your HAT and your SMARTPHONE, as expected. Your SHOVEL, in the fourth slot, is being particularly stubborn, but it will have to become available in a minute or so. Then you can finally put it in your STRIFE SPECIBUS where it belongs. The WEIRD WINDOW THINGS are still in a captcha egg too. They must be pretty heavy. The HUBS and the GLOVES, hovever, have become available, but you're in no hurry to use them yet. Finally, the eighth slot contains your newly-captchalogued SBURB disks.

> Head upstairs. No time to lose!


You make your way back to your room. You consider ejecting your sylladex now that you're back, but quickly dismiss that thought since you're carrying some precious cargo at the moment. Besides, the tiny SBURB disks are already retrievable by now.

====>


Time to find Annie and get this show on the road.

[CoffeePerson]

==> find your client disk, you scatter brained hobo!



You VERY RELUCTANTLY stop playing Touhou. You just love how insane this game is, how totally unbeatable and how awesome the screen looks filled with a gazillion bombs and missles. It's what we all really want from life. Little girls trying to kill each other in the most random ways possible.



You also have to get off 4chan. That's not actually as hard.


==> look in the bathroom




It's not really a bathroom anymore. It's your SHROOM CHAMBERS. One of these babies, and you'll be tripping so hard you WISHED you were dead.
You haven't tried the one with the skulll on it because you're pretty sure you'll die. It looks ominous.

You look around a bit, but then get bored. You only wanted to come in here to show off your hot tub. It doesn't work, but it sure makes you look swanky. None of your neighbors have one, and you are sure they are absolutely livid with jealousy.

[MasterBlade]

A mysterious man dressed in ancient garb stands in the middle of an ancient temple. This character has had a name for quite a while and you will not attempt to give him one. You will neither attempt to command this figure, as he has his own agenda to follow.



An agenda he has been following for several years. Planning, plotting, scheming. From the dawn of the universe this person has influenced the development of the planet as its first guardian.



It was his influence that shook up the hierarchy of the troll race to put a male tyrian blood on the throne. To him he has instilled his own ambitious nature, wanting power, wanting conquest.



All in preparation for this day, when his home would be destroyed. With the planet destroyed, his obligation to it will be finished. Then he will be truly free to go about his master plan.



The pieces are falling into place. Now the game truly begins.

[Ross_Varn]

====>

Great. There's suddenly a hundred and twenty nine more reasons to worry about choosing this lot to play. Affecting the real world- now what? You've got some time to burn before anyone gets around to helping you start... Might as well reply to a few of those comments on your story-



wait

what

That's authorized by the Emperor- why would Tyranr-

ATTENTION, REBEL SCUM!

>Raeoch: Your Blade


They're here. You draw your saber.

EmptY your SpecibuS and laY down on the grounD with your handS on your heaD, filtH, and we will not be forceD to firE!
I wσuldn'τ be tσσ sure αbσuτ τhιs, τhresh- you're mαking α mιstαke-
OBEY OR WE WILL ENGAGE!

>Raeoch: Negotiate


Betrayed.

Fιne then, α duel ιt ιs. With my rιght αs Duelsαge's descendαnτ, I chσσse my weαpσn.
Hah! The CodE is defuncT, you fooL. It dieD with the elder'S generatioN!
Yσu wσuld deny me my chαllenge?
...choosE your weapoN, scuM.
Excellenτ. I think yσu cσuld have predιcτed τhιs σne, τrσll. I chσσse-



-bαdger.
WhaT-



>Raeoch: Abscond



Yeah, you've got to move now, before-



-you forgot about his gun.

>Raeoch: Awaken

[retroScavenger]

>Annie: Be ready!
Oh god, are you ready! All that's left is to get Will to be your server player and then blam! You can play! However you're not too fond of the planet being destroyed. But oh-well. It will happen anyways. Hmm. It appears Will has just logged into pesterchum. You jump on pestering him immidiately!


-- briodeNebuliser [BN] began pestering rusticRaptor [RR] --

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BN: hey
RR: Oh hey.
RR: I'm back at my computer now.
BN: what were you doing other than that?
RR: I had to run to my mom's lab to do some things with her equipment.
BN: oh
BN: did you have any issues doing that?
RR: In related news, I got Tom's present delivered on time.
RR: But yes.
BN: really? are you ok?
RR: A bunch of problems.
BN: as long as youre okay
RR: Luckily none of them involved a meteor directly
RR: HOLY SHIT
RR: I just looked outside
RR: The lab I was just at
BN: did it explode
RR: It was just demolished
BN: it exploded didnt it
RR: By a huge meteor
BN: oh wow
BN: thats uhh
BN: thats bad

>Annie: Aww.

Wow that's two people or otherwise important living beings dead already. You're hoping this won't happen more often, of course. That would be terrible. Man, that was some bad news, you think. You'd never met Will's mom or anything but from what you could tell she was pretty cool.

show spoiler

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RR: I was IN THERE 5 minutes ago
BN: sdgsdgsdgsadg
BN: thats cray bro
RR: It's fucked up
BN: any news about the game?
RR: I got my copy right here.
RR: Has much more happened on your end though?
BN: other than tom shooting things and cat ghosts not really
RR: Tom told me about his meteor. Then I saw the beginning of the downpour.
RR: But the cat ghost thing is new.
BN: oh nothing much
BN: just some weird game mechanic
BN: that requires you to prototype your kernelsprite or some shit
BN: ill show you when we play i guess
BN: you should install the client disc
BN: in advance
BN: as well as the other one
BN: im installing the one i need to to play right now
RR: So I connect to you in the same manner that you connected to him?
BN: yep basically
BN: and maybe quickly
BN: i dont even know if there is a meteor about to crash or anything
RR: Okay, so I'm installing the client...
RR: Nothing but a console window that says it's waiting...
RR: Now for the server...
BN: i gotta connect too
BN: press enter bro? y/y
RR: I see that on my server.
RR: Ready?
BN: ready as ill ever be
RR: 3
RR: 2
RR: 1
RR: ENTER
BN: okay okay okay
BN: did it work
RR: Whoa, trippy loading screen.
BN: yeah it is

WoAh MoThErFuCkEr

RR: I see a room on my screen.
BN: is it my room
BN: am i in it
RR: Whoa I think it is!
RR: Holy shit how is that possible without a webcam?
BN: subwave signal or something
RR: I can even scroll arouns and stuff.
BN: idk
BN: yep
BN: you can also edit things
BN: like irl
RR: Okay I gotta try this.
BN: dont break any-
BN: ok you can break a little
RR: :B
RR: Which side of the house is your room on again?
BN: uhh
BN: upstairs left
-- rusticRaptor [RR] expands Annie's room leftward, partially out over the yard. --




RR: whoa
BN: dont tip the house
BN: :P
RR: that's sweet
BN: yep it is
RR: I'm sure it'll be fine if I add supports and stuff.
BN: okay
BN: theres a thing called the phernalia registry
BN: and it lets you place machines that are kinda important
-- rusticRaptor [RR] moves the bookshelf behind the bed. The glove falls to the ground. --



>Annie: WOW RUDE.

He knocked you out of your chair with the bookshelf. Oh well, it didn't really hurt at all. You get back up and walk aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaall the way back to your computer chair.

RR: Okay now we have some room. What do I place first?
BN: hmm
BN: i recall the cruxtruder being the most important for now
RR: Oh wait. Almost forgot those supports. Machines are heavy.
-- rusticRaptor [RR] makes columns under the expanded section. --
BN: awesome
RR: Ok then. One cruxtruder coming up.
BN: cool cool cool
-- rusticRaptor [RR] places the cruxtruder in a corner of the new section. --





RR: Should I deploy the totem thingy too? It'll probably fit.
BN: thatd be awesome
BN: we can place the alchemiwhatever later
-- rusticRaptor [RR] places the Totem Lathe in the other corner. --



BN: we need something heavy to drop on the cruxtruder right now though
BN: idk what though
RR: hmm
RR: Oh hey I also have a punched captchalogue card thing. Should I give that to you?
BN: yeah
BN: im gonna need that soon
-- rusticRaptor [RR] places the card on Annie's desk. --
RR: What's it for anyway?
BN: you insert it into the totem lathe and it carves a totem
BN: one sec
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] cranks the valve on the cruxtruder a few times and grabs one of the cruxite dowels. --
RR: Okay, I'm dropping something on the Crux thingy now.
BN: aight
-- rusticRaptor [RR] picks up the bookshelf and drops it on the cruxtruder's lid. The Cruxtruder glows pink. --

show spoiler

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BN: woah
RR: What's with the pink shiny thing that popped out?
BN: kernelsprite
BN: its the thing that turns into a ghostlike being
RR: oh
RR: So Tom had one that became the ghost cat?
BN: well
BN: we threw a star trek poster at it
BN: and it became the star trek logo
BN: and then shit happened and then we threw a cat at it
RR: okay...
BN: and it became romanacatsprite or something
RR: weird
RR: really freaking weird
RR: But if it's part of the game then we gotta roll with it.
BN: yeah
BN: like those quests where you just escort people to places
RR: ugh
RR: Hey wait. I see something on the cruxtruder's display.
BN: oh
BN: i forgot about that
RR: We have less than an hour and a half till something happens.
BN: meteors
BN: meteors in an hour and a half
RR: Knew it.
RR: But that's way more time than what Tom had, right?
BN: yeah it is
RR: So what do we have to do in the meantime?
BN: shenanigans
BN: lots of shenanigans
BN: and some srs bsns
RR: Right
RR: So where do we start?
RR: With this "prototyping" business?
BN: well
BN: we find something to throw at it that we want it to become
BN: it seems to affect some monsters too though
BN: i have a few pages from my doctor who encyclopedia i have ready to prototype though
RR: okay
RR: Just be careful what you put there.
BN: got it
RR: I don't follow Dr. Who closely, but I've heard there's some pretty crazy stuff.
BN: ill say
RR: If it afects enemies, don't put the TARDIS in or anything.
RR: Time travel is pretty sweet, but I don't want to be up against it.
BN: i dont intend to
BN: fuck up our entire game
BN: just some of it
RR: :B
RR: Just go ahead.

>ANNIE: TO BE CONTINUED!

[CoffeePerson]

==> look through your sylladex



That's the worst idea you've had all day! Let's do it!






What a piece of shit!!!!!


==> think of something else




You could eat a mushroom for inspiration but WHO KNOWS what would happen. Something totally crazy, duh! WHATEVER. Raeoch doesn't have to know. You already tried a bunch of other stuff. Bluhhh, what a nag!


==> find your inspiration, Aeviss!!!!



Huh? Were you doing something???


==> you are now one with the universe



Nothing makes sense now. The universe is beautiful chaos. Your brain is flipping out.

==> remember where you put the gamegrub



AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Your thinkpan conjures up the image of a CD disk. You don't even know what the fuck that is. You are sure it's alien technology. In fact, you think you can see the 4th wall from here. The artist screwed up. You know now. You know where your client grub is. You left it at the bottom of your recuperoon. Not even as high as you are, can you recall exactly why. Oh well.

==> calm down and go troll Tyranr




Oh yeah, you were playing Sgrub. You forgot how crazy this game was. There's no way you're NOT going to play more of this game.
You dig your client grub out of your recuperoon and wipe the sopor off your hands before getting on the keyboard.



-- musicalMobocracy [MM] began pestering chargingCrusader [CC]--

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MM: (@) (@) oh hiiii yoooo!!! >:o
MM: (@) (@) yew hav noooo idea what my day haz bean liek!
MM: (@) yore luckey that i half my copy rite now, yew know
CC: <[Who^dares^disturb^the^Empreror?]>
CC: <[Wait]]>
CC: <[Are^you^a^bard?]>
MM: (@) not juuuust a bard, fish paste
CC: <[Oh,^I^must^have^the^wrong^person,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[I^was^supposed^to^be^playing^with^a^bard.]>
MM: (@) thee battul bard Renigaide??? quit beeting arownd the boosh, yew lozar
MM: (@) yew know hoo you aur talking 2!!!
CC: <[Yes,^an^insolent^yellowblood.]>
CC: <[Who^seems^to^have^a^fairly^hard^time^spelling^the^ simplest^of^words.]>
MM: (@) nice try!! but towtally wrong as ushuwal
MM: (@) who kares abowt how things aur suppoused two be spelled?
CC: <[Well,^it^does^make^you^seem^even^less^intelligent^ than^you^obviously^are.]>
MM: (@) CHAOS mothurfukker!! memorize et!!
MM: (@) oh well, whuuuuutevar
CC: <[Hmph.^Chaos,^FUCKTARD.]>
CC: <[Choas^will^never^beat^order.]>
CC: <[It^can't^get^organized^enough,^WORM.]>
MM: (@) ordar always braycs down eventualley!!!
MM: (@) yore organization is wurthless en the end, hahahahaha
CC: <[Only^because^it^ends^up^morphing^into^chaos,^MOTHE RFUCKER.]>
CC: <[The^Empire^is^the^embodiment^of^order,^and^its^bee n^running^for^hundreds^of^sweeps.]>
CC: <[No^end^in^sight.]>
MM: (@) that's mai point!! its the dam holding bakk the eneveetabul!!
MM: (@) one crakk is all it takes
MM: (@) ALL IT TAYCS
CC: <[The^Empire^will^never^crack.^]>
CC: <[That's^the^flaw^in^your^arguement.]>
MM: (@) yahh rite!!!!!!
CC: <[With^a^strong^and^intelligent^leader^like^myself,^ it^simply^cannot^fail,^MORON.]>
CC: <[That^is^the^fact^of^the^matter.]>
MM: (@) theyre everywhar and yew are just tooowtally blind two them
MM: (@) springing leeks all ovar thee place
CC: <[These^leaks^are^plugged^with^the^mighty^force^of^p aperwork!]>
CC: <[It^is^the^bastion^between^ourselves^and^chaos.]>
CC: <[You^should^be^kissing^my^feet^for^the^privelege^of ^talking^to^your^allmighty^and^selfless^leader!]>
MM: (@) why wud i dew that? >:?
MM: (@) can you heer it??? the waturfall of KAOS wayting two fall??
CC: <[It^shall^never^break^the^mighty^dam^of^order!]>
CC: <[We^shall^be^a^heroic^and^invincible^wall,^undaunte d^by^the^admittedly^powerful^lure^of^these^black^w aters!]>
MM: (@) papurwurk sure iz a krummy plug!!!!
MM: (@) aur u evun lizening tew yoreself?? wow!
CC: <[I^don't^need^to^listen^to^myself^I^fucking^KNOW^wh at^I']>
CC: <[m^fucking^saying!]>
CC: <[Shit,^all^this^butter^is^making^it^hard^to^type,^S TUPIDHEAD.]>
MM: (@) tell me abowt the buttar! it'z way more interesting then yore blabbering
CC: <[I'm^eating^butter^because^I^can.]>
MM: (@) hahahahaha!! me gusta!! >:D
CC: <[It^is^a^way^of^exerting^my^superiority^over^the^un washed^masses,^such^as^yourself.]>
MM: (@) ohhh? wat do they evun have in common, yore fishiness?
CC: <["Your^Highness,"^or^"Most^Exalted^One"^would^be^a^ better^way^of^adressing^me.]>
CC: <[And^they^are^simply^stupid^and^crude.]>
MM: (@) no wai! eye'm not kalling u that until yew earn it!! pppppffft!
CC: <[Crude?^Why^on^earth^would^I^want^to^EARN^a^title^l ike^that?]>
CC: <[I'm^the^Emperor.^I^have^no^time^for^crudeness.]>
CC: <[Anyways]>
CC: <[We^should^probably^get^on^that^whole^SGRUB^thing.]>
MM: (@) *farts*
CC: <[I^assume^that^you--]>
CC: <[See,^this^is^what^I^mean^by^CRUDE,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
MM: (@) >:DDDD
MM: (@) too bad!!!
CC: <[Whatever,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[Do^you^want^to^give^me^enternal^power,^or^not?]>
CC: <[I^mean,^play^a^game.]>
MM: (@) i'm a dirty lowblood, i don't hav tyme two bee polight!!
CC: <[Well,^respect^is^one^thing,^manners^are^another.]>
MM: (@) but now u have mai interest peeked!
CC: <[Simply^adressing^me^as^"Sir"^would^be^fine.]>
MM: (@) nope
CC: <[Argh,^fine.]>
CC: <[I'll^just^kill^you^later.^I^have^shit^to^do^right^ now,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
CC: <[And^you^aren't^helping^me^by^stalling.]>
CC: <[Have^you^established^the^connection?]>
MM: (@) it'd be boring to get right twooo it! becuz i know ur juzt going two go bakk 2 ignoring my messages
CC: <[I^do?]>
CC: <[I'm^pretty^sure^we've^never^met^before.]>
MM: (@) i'm going two enjoy this whiyle i kan!!!
CC: <[I^would^remember^one^of^your^insolance,^OH^STUPID^ ONE.]>
MM: (@) see? C?
MM: (@) yore a huge liar! and i liek it!
CC: <[I^am^the^EMPEROR.^Whatever^I^say^is^the^truth,^FUC KTARD.]>
CC: <[Godammit,^you^did^it^again.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] finishes establish the Sgrub connection with [CS] --

[Ario]

>Be Kwardos.
You are now KWARDOS and are REALLY EXHAUSTED.
Those imps or whatever just kept coming at you... but they're all gone.
It wouldn't have taken so long if you didn't have to fight them all one-on-one...
wait.

>Wait what?
You remember that your supposed ancestor, THE SAMURAI, mentioned a technique in his journal that can take many foes out at once.
Maybe you should try to find it.

==>
You suppose you should check your bookshelf in your room, so you start heading in that direction.

==>

This... might take a bit.

[Edo Nagori]

>Tom: awaken



====>



You are now Tom Leonard, and you have woken up in this strange golden room. It's kind of like your room but it is not. You look around a bit, pondering exactly how you got here. You were fighting this gutless asshole, when you passed out... In the manliest way possible. Honestly, you sort of CHOSE to pass out, yeah, that's it. Totally didn't black out like a sissy, no-siree. Anyway, you probably should figure out where you are, and why you are wearing these kicking pajamas.

> Tom: Peer through window



You take a look out of the window, amazed by what you see. You aren't in castle land, you aren't in castle land at all! Instead you are in this amazing golden city. You can't get that good a look from your window, perhaps you should explore a bit? Except, there is no door in this room you are stuck in... Oh well, jumping through the window always works.

====>



You jump out of the window with reckless abandon. Luckily you can fly now, which is kind of a good thing or else tom guts would be splattered all over the city streets. You would not want to be that Sanitation Worker. Speaking of that, you notice a ton of little white people walking around the city. Huh, pretty strange folk. You look up to see another section of the city. Apparently it's bigger than the one that you are on, so you decide to check it out.

====>



Huh, what is that?

====>



You see a strange grey girl floating in front of you. She is obviously not one of those little white guys... You wonder who she could be?

>Tom: Talk to spunky Alien girl



You try to talk to her, when suddenly something wakes you up.

====>



====>



Oh fuck no.

[CoffeePerson]

==> Tyranr: look around




CC: <[Stop^sidetracking^me,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
CC: <[Well,^you're^done,^MORON.]>
CC: <[Is,^MORON.]>
CC: <[Is^this^your^hive?]>
MM: (@) duhhhh
CC: <[Hmm,^IDIOT.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] scoots back from her seat to grin nastily --
CC: <[You^look^different^than^I^expected,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
MM: (@) liek i kud make heads rolls?!?
CC: <[No,^less^like^a^peasant^covered^in^dirt,^and^more^ like^a^skank.]>
MM: (@) we're aul skanks en the lowblud guttars, bitch!
MM: (@) we'll kill yew for yore lunch money!! skared yet???
CC: <[Hold^on.]>





-- chargingCrusader [CC] uses cursor to rip out wall --
CC: <[Hey,^IDIOT.]>
CC: <[This^is^fun.]>
MM: (@) i didunt need that ennyways!!
CC: <[Alright,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>





-- chargingCrusader [CC] tosses wall far, far away --
MM: (@) wat a pussy throw!
CC: <[Hmmmm.^What^are^all^these^machines^for?]>
MM: (@) well i kud tell yew wat they did
-- chargingCrusader [CC] selects and places a machine. --
CC: <[Wait,^hold^on^a^second.]>
MM: (@) but only if i wuz inclined!!
-- chargingCrusader [CC] begins ripping down walls for the grist. --
-- chargingCrusader [CC] begins to build --
MM: (@) hey, yew whore!!
CC: <[Calm^your^tits,^MORON.^I'm^just^trying^to^spell^my ^name.]>
CC: <[Because^that^would^be^pretty^awesome.]>
CC: <[Having^my^name,^just,^THERE,^MORON.]>
CC: <[Fit^for^an^emperor,^MORON.]>
MM: (@) wow, yore moar egotistical then i dreeeemed!!
CC: <[At^least^I^have^a^reason^for^being^egotistical,^OH ^STUPID^ONE.^]>
CC: <[I'm^the^highest^blood^color^of^all,^OH^STUPID^ONE.]>
MM: (@) choke on a bulge, emperor!! >:(
MM: (@) i'll get yew fore this, i hope you know
CC: <[Whatever,^MOTHERFUCKER.^I'm^not^worried.]>
MM: (@) i don't let down on a grudge, fukker!!!
-- chargingCrusader [CC] has spelled his name, destroying the hive in the process --




CC: <[There.]>
CC: <[Now^lets^place^these^machines.]>
CC: <[That^"crux"^one^is^already^down,^OH^STUPID^ONE.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] places one machine as far away as possible --
-- chargingCrusader [CC] places the other on the roof --
CC: <[There,^WORM.]>
MM: (@) wat, r u prowd uf youreself??? hahaha!!!!
MM: (@) u trashed mai whole hiyve!
CC: <[Yup.]>
CC: <[And^spelled^my^name.]>
MM: (@) yew suck at this!!
CC: <[Which^is^pretty^sweet,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[Oh,^hold^on,^there's^a^card^thing^too,^STUPIDHEAD.]>





-- chargingCrusader [CC] places card thing on the head of MM. --
CC: <[Hahaha.^Look,^the^lowblood^has^a^hat.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] snatches it and then bares her teeth --
MM: (@) yew haven't seen my hat yet!
MM: (@) it'z waaaay moar fashionabul, let me tell you
CC: <[Say,^this^is^fun,^FUCKTARD.^I^could^get^used^to^th is.]>
CC: <[Now,^is^this^it?^Is^it^done?]>
MM: (@) having aul the control is only fitting four a coward
CC: <[Well,^see,^normally^I^would^agree^with^you,^but^OH ^WAIT,^I^HAVE^ALL^THE^CONTROL,^FUCKTARD.]>
CC: <[HAHAHAHAHA,^MORON.]>
CC: <[Oooooh,^look,^I^can^fuck^with^stuff^besides^walls.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] starts trashing shit, more than that shit is already trashed. --
MM: (@) i know!! et was pretty awesome fucking weth Rongur!!
MM: (@) but now et's lame
MM: (@) be moar creative!!!
CC: <[Hey,^what's^this?]>
CC: <[It^was^outside^the^window,^FUCKTARD.]>





-- chargingCrusader [CC] holds up sanity --
MM: (@) meh, thatz juzt my sanity
MM: (@) u can throw it owt
CC: <[Alright.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] throws sanity far, far away again. --





CC: <[Hmm.]>
MM: (@) trash the place, fish paste!! >:D
CC: <[What^happens^if^I^start^dumping^shit^on^the^machin es?]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] picks up recuperacoon --
MM: (@) make it so kaotic yew don't recognize it
MM: (@) then yew'll understand that ordur is a waaaaste of tyme
-- chargingCrusader [CC] dumps recuperacoon on cruxtruder --
CC: <[Nah,^this^isn't^chaos.]>
CC: <[It's^just^fucking^with^a^lowblood,^IDIOT.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] watching the cruxtruder begin to smoke dangerously --
MM: (@) i'll fuck yore shit up laytar, too!! keep an eye out fore me, becuz you're alreddy screwed big time
CC: <[Yeah,^yeah,^yeah,^whatever,^IDIOT.]>
CC: <[You're^not^the^one^eating^the^butter.]>
CC: <[Oh,^hey,^what^the^fuck?]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] watches as a shiny thing comes out of Cruxtruder --
CC: <[What^is^that?]>
MM: (@) boooring
MM: (@) i alreddy did this weth rongar! the gayme didunt even try to kum up with ennything new!
MM: (@) it's the kernulspriyt
MM: (@) but watch this!





-- musicalMobocracy [MM] spins the cruxtruder wheel wildly and a million dowels come shooting out --
CC: <[Whoa.]>
CC: <[That^is^a^lot^of,^STUPIDHEAD..,^WORM.^things,^MOTH ERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[Argh,^cursed^quirk,^FUCKTARD.]>
CC: <[It^always^screws^up^these^ellipses,^WORM.]>
MM: (@) why aur yew kumplay-ning abowt your OWN quirk????
MM: (@) u chose it, dumbfuck!!!
MM: (@) hahahahaha, thats hilarius!
CC: <[Well,^its^a^random--^oh,^nevermind,^too^complex^for^one^of^your^intell ect.]>
CC: <[Anyways,^I'm^going^to^throw^shit^at^that^ball^now.]>
MM: (@) wait!! >:o
CC: <[What?^Does^that^do^anything?]>
MM: (@) normully i wud say throwing RANDUM shit at it was a gud thing!!!
CC: <[No,^I^was^probably^going^to^try^and^pick^the^thing ^that^would^piss^you^off^most,^IDIOT.]>
MM: (@) but i aktually want yew to put my anzestor's book en it!!! >:D
CC: <[Hmph,^IDIOT.^Fuck^that.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] picks up a fallen poster --
MM: (@) i want two see wat happens, ok?????
CC: <[I'll^do^THIS,^FUCKTARD.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] chucks poster into kernelsprite --
MM: (@) ohohoho, yew are such aye giant beeeeetch!
MM: (@) katamari king, noooo! >:(




-- musicalMobocracy [MM] watches the kernel sprite float in the air with the King of All Cosmos' face --
MM: (@) ughhhhhh
CC: <[What.]>
CC: <[The^fuck,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[Is^that,^FUCKTARD.]>
MM: (@) i gess thats kind of KAOTIC, but nawt compared 2 mai anses-tore
CC: <[Hmmm.]>
CC: <[So^this^journal^is^pretty^valuable,^huh?]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] picks up journal --
MM: (@) well if you kud decipher it!! but phat chance!!
CC: <[Alright.]>
-- chargingCrusader [CC] sticks it on roof --
CC: <[There.]>
CC: <[Fetch,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
MM: (@) i knew yew were going two dew that!! wowww, that wasnt prediktuble at aul!!
MM: (@) guess wat i'm going to do instedd??? >:D
CC: <[Probably^start^using^those^totem^things,^STUPIDHEA D.]>
MM: (@) oh
MM: (@) i gess that was prediktabul
MM: (@) now i have to do sumthing thats nawt that....
MM: (@) watevar!!! i kan be KAOTIC afterwards!!!
CC: <[Agreed,^MOTHERFUCKER.^Once^again,^order^overcomes^ you.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] takes the dowel and brings it to the totem lathe --
MM: (@) well i kan't be randum aaalll the tyme >:/
MM: (@) unfortunately!!
CC: <[Yeah,^yeah,^yeah.]>
CC: <[Lets^get^on^with^it,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
MM: (@) yahh!! so we kan get two the good part
MM: (@) like whare i find yew and tear out yore spine, yew big bucket sack!
CC: <[Oh,^wow,^I^am^so^scared.]>
CC: <[I^am^just^shaking^in^my^fortress,^which^can^be^so^ easily^pentrated^by^a^little^skanky^troll.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] carves her totem by inserting her punch card, and then stands on a trash bin to scale her hive, attempting to get some leverage by the roof gutter --
MM: (@) yew shud
MM: (@) umpph
MM: (@) be!
CC: <[Here,^let^me^help^you^with^that.]>




-- chargingCrusader [CC] pours trash on MM. --
CC: <[Hahahahaha,^MOTHERFUCKER.]>
CC: <[You^have^a^hat^of^shit^now.]>
MM: (@) i smell liek flowers!! hahaha fukk you! >:D
MM: (@) i bet yew've nevar been dumpster diving, highblud
MM: (@) we have to do that, yew know!!
CC: <[Of^course^not,^WORM.]>
CC: <[I'm^much^smarter^than^that,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
MM: (@) pffft, yah rite
MM: (@) to live here, en the gutters
MM: (@) yew do anything u kan 2 survive!!!
CC: <[Yeah.^That^way^all^the^weaks^ones^can^go^and^die,^ so^the^strong^can^serve^their^Emperor.]>
CC: <[Do^you^know^how^much^money^culling^costs?]>
CC: <[A^lot.]>
MM: (@) wow, i reely don't like yew
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] pats off her sweatpants and then reaches her alchemiter.... --
CC: <[I^don't^want^to^be^liked,^WORM.^I^want^to^be^FEARE D,^STUPIDHEAD.]>
CC: <[Fear^is^what^drives^a^might^empire^forwards.]>
MM: (@) we all do!! we want to be feered and nasty and big bluh bluh trolls! duhhhh
MM: (@) that wuz a kompliment!




-- musicalMobocracy [MM] freezes when she hears a tiger roaring, not in the distance, but very very close nearby --
CC: <[Then^perhaps^you^are^gaining^more^respect,^MORON.]>
CC: <[Good^for^you,^IDIOT.]>
-- musicalMobocracy [MM] stops when her lusus roars back and rears up on it's hind legs --

[retroScavenger]

> Annie: Prototype!

-- briodeNebuliser [BN] folds the The Doctor page, The TORCHWOOD page, the cybermen page, the daleks page, and the page for gallifrey into a paper airplane and throws them at the kernelsprite. --




A glowing, pink ball floats above your head and you recognize it to be the Gallifreyan symbol for "Timelord." Wow, that's awesome! You wonder what it will look like after entry. You then decide to continue talking to Will.

BN: doctorsprite?
RR: wow
BN: its still a kernelsprite though
BN: wait till you see it after i enter the medium
RR: It's still pretty cool what that thing does.
RR: So it'll talk once you're there too?
BN: yeah
RR: sweet
BN: right now if i try i think it will just give me useless gibberish
RR: Right
RR: So waht's next?
RR: Don't I need to place that last machine>
RR: ?
BN: yeah the alchemiter
BN: you can place it in my moms study
BN: theres really nothing in there since she doesnt live here
RR: It's huge. You sure it'll fit in there?
BN: im pretty sure
BN: we can expand it if its not big enough though
RR: It's pretty tall too. I might have to expand the ceiling.
BN: maybe
BN: we can do it
BN: we are a team bro
-- rusticRaptor [RR] expands the ceiling. --
RR: Hey wait.
BN: hmm?
RR: Is there a room above that study?

>Annie: Fondly regard lavatory.

Hmm. IS there a room above the study? Oh yeah, the smallest bathroom. You remember so many good times, sitting in there, playing with action figures. You're too old for that now, however. You are becoming a young lady! It is improper for a young lady to play with toys--
Yes, you are speaking sarcastically. Completely and totally sarcastically.
Not in the slightest bit are you even almost pondering saying that sentence seriously.
Ever.

RR: Because whatever room that is just got a bit smaller.
BN: just a bathroom
BN: it was already kinda tiny
RR: ...
RR: Whoops
RR: Don't go into that room.
BN: got it
BN: is the alchemiter placed yet?
-- rusticRaptor [RR] places it in the study. --
-- rusticRaptor [RR] *thud* --

You hear a loud noise. You sincerely hope that Will didn't damage your house at all! Jeez, would your nanny be mad... wherever she may be.

RR: Now it is!
BN: that was loud
BN: okay
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] cranks the valve on the cruxtruder and grabs a few cruxite dowels. --
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] inserts the pre-punched captchalogue card into the totem lathe as well as the cruxite dowel. --
RR: So the card programs the lathe or something?
BN: yep
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] carves the totem. --
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] captchalogues the totem. --
RR: So what does the totem do now?
BN: i believe i take it to the alchemiter and make a cruxite artifact
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] does so. --
BN: wow
BN: thats an oven
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] hits the oven, but there is no result. --

An oven? Wow you have actually no idea how to work one of these. Somebody has always made you your food instead of you doing it yourself! Shit, you're actually starting to realize that you're pretty codependent. That's... bad.

RR: Neat, but how does that help you enter?
BN: im not sure
RR: Is there anything inside it?
BN: yeah, theres a cruxite cake inside it
BN: i just cant open it
BN: ill wait for the timer i guess
BN: which is conveniently right before the countdown ends
RR: Coincidence or not?
BN: doubt it
RR: So I guess we just gotta wait.
RR: Hmm
BN: is there anything else in the registry?
RR: What can we do in the meantime...
RR: Nothing free
RR: but...
BN: do we have any grist
RR: We have enough for this extra disk thing.
BN: extra disc thing
BN: im interested
RR: Or something called a punch card shunt, but I think that goes with something called the jumper block extension that we can't afford.
BN: oh :(
RR: The disk costs 100 Build grist. We have only a few hundred atm.
RR: Should I deploy it?
BN: totally
RR: Sweet
-- rusticRaptor [RR] sets the mystery disk in front of Annie. --
BN: i guess i should install this on my computer
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] installs Gristtorrent. --
BN: what? this shit is a torrent for grist
BN: and it costed grist
BN: gristception
-- rusticRaptor [RR] zooms in on Annie's computer. --



>Annie: Continue conversation.

show spoiler

hide spoiler

RR: Whoa really?
RR: I can't see it too well from my position.
RR: But we can torrent grist?
RR: From where?
BN: not exactly sure about that
BN: lemme check it out
BN: it seems we can torrent grist from eachother
RR: So just between you and Tom at this point?
BN: actually thats the weird part
BN: its not just between me and tom
BN: it shows me as seeding
BN: it shows tom as leeching
BN: and then another person leeching???
RR: what?
BN: as well as five offline slots??????????????????
RR: Only you and Tom have connected clients in our particular game.
RR: And there are 4 of us.
RR: What is this shit?
BN: there must be four other people planning to play this game with us
RR: Weird.
BN: or its just the game fucking with us
RR: Or maybe it's a sort of "max 8 players but we only have 4"
RR: There are 8 big squares on the SBURB logo. I still wonder if that means anything...
RR: I dunno. We'll probably find out later.
BN: maybe its nothing
BN: who knows
RR: Maybe.
RR: But from the little I've seen so far of this game, everything means something...
BN: true
RR: So do Tom or the other guy have any shale?
RR: If you snag some I can put down a designix.
BN: let me see
BN: actually yeah
BN: tom has some shale
BN: i can steal some of that and he wont even notice hehe
RR: heh
RR: >:D
BN: okay
BN: i think thats enough to deploy the designix
RR: Yep.
BN: i think theres room in my room
RR: A single second's worth of download is enough actually :P
-- rusticRaptor [RR] places the designix where the bookshelf used to be. --
RR: And there we go.
BN: cool cool cool
BN: jesus what does this thing even do
BN: it has a captchalogue card slot but i dont know
RR: You and Tom didn't figure it out yet?
BN: not quite
BN: i couldnt place that for him
BN: since he was the first player
RR: ah
RR: Well you should be able to now, right?
BN: yeah i can :D
RR: Cool.
BN: but what do i do with it?
RR: It looks like it has a label on it.
RR: Did you try reading that?
BN: uhh
BN: lemme check it out
BN: okay
BN: looks like i type in whats on the back of a captchalogue card and then insert it
RR: Oh, the weird mystery codes on the cards?
BN: yep
RR: Let's see what happens. Type it!
BN: what should i use?
RR: I dunno. Anything you can captchalogue or have already captchalogued.
BN: my screwdriver i could go fetch the tardis rc
RR: Sure
BN: either one?
RR: How about the screwdriver first.
BN: awesome
-- rusticRaptor [RR] is now an idle chum! --
BN: okay
BN: i have a punched scrwdrvr card now
RR: Wait, can you still use the screwdriver?
BN: it wasnt my strife specibus
BN: it was the extra one my nanny makes me carry around
RR: oh
RR: Well does the card still work? Or did we just bust it?
BN: i think it works
BN: i guess we should carve a totem with this
RR: Okay. Lets see if it works like the oven did.
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] did so. --
BN: it appears to have worked
RR: Yep
RR: Looks like that cost a few build grist to make.
BN: well see when i take it to the alchemiter
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] took it to the alchemiter and made another scrwdrvr for a measley small amount of grist. --
RR: Looks like we CAN make stuff this way.
BN: i can experiment with this! it seems you can put multiple things in at once
BN: my internet connection is fleeting
BN: its just my crappy computer
BN: dont blame me if i disconnect

-- briodeNebuliser [BN] ceased pestering rusticRaptor [RR] at 19:05 --

> Annie: Be the Sharpshoot starter.

PSYCHE SWITCH!!!

show spoiler

hide spoiler

BN: woah okay i think i can make more of these blank cards for the future
BN: let me check the code
RR: How big is your sylladex anyway?
BN: pretty damn big
BN: its dimensionally transcendental but its no hammerspace modus
RR: Still nice though.
BN: yep
RR: My "egg" modus came with a dozen cards :/
RR: Useful enough but most of the cards are in use now.
BN: yeah i guess
BN: okay i can make tons of more cards
RR: So what's the code if you pull a captchaception?
BN: 11111111
RR: oh
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] made a few dozen more blank cards. --
BN: theyre cheap so
RR: Spread the word to Tom in case he needs to make some.
BN: got it
RR: Let's try another combo card now.
RR: See if we can make something affordable this time.
BN: mkay
BN: hmmm
RR: Just put 2 everyday things in there.
RR: What about that glove on the floor?
BN: wait a minute
BN: i have a plan
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] captchalogues her computer. --
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] punches her computer's card. --
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] captchalogues the glove and punches it with the computer's card. --
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] alchemizes them to make SUPER COMPUGLOVES. --
BN: woah
BN: these are cool
RR: Oh hey.
RR: That's pretty sweet.
BN: i can move around and talk at the same time now
RR: It cost more grist than the other stuff, but we still have a bit left.
BN: ok
BN: its basically my computer in a glove so im sure i can use sburb too for tom
RR: Nice!
RR: Looks like overlapping cards does make combination items.
RR: Wait...
BN: hm?
RR: What if you punch the same card with 2 codes?
RR: Does that do something different?
BN: let me check
-- briodeNebuliser [BN] made the GLOVEPUTING DESKTOP. --

>Annie: ...

... there is truly no explanation for this ...


RR: Pfft
BN: this piece of shit might do me good in the future
RR: As funny as it looks, it probably works as a computer.
BN: yeah
RR: Well that was interesting.
RR: I think we figured out this item-making business.
BN: yes
BN: we will make this a business
BN: this will forever be known as the international alchemization trade
BN: but not really
RR: Oh man if the world wasn't ending this stuff could make us millions.
RR: If we made the right stuff
BN: totally
BN: but we would need moar grist
RR: yep
RR: So what are we officially calling this? "Item Alchemy" because of the "Alchemy Excursus" and the "Alchemiter?"
BN: i guess
RR: Well, looks like you're ready to enter and whatever now. Not sure what more I can do here.
BN: yep pretty much
BN: just a few more minutes until the timer is ready
RR: Mind if I step out for a bit though? I've got some more shit to take care of.
RR: Namely making sure my mom's okay and hiding something that would piss off Dian if she saw it as my server.
BN: yeah sure
BN: seeya later bro
RR: Seeya!
-- rusticRaptor [RR] ceased pestering briodeNebuliser [BN] at 18:19 --

>Annie: NOW be Tom.