> Wear bag as hat.
Oh god this is not the time for that wait who are you kidding there's always time for baghats, baghats are the shit
> You don't sound like Steve.
"Roo don't sooond rike Steeeeve," you say in the worst and least accurate asian accent you are capable of.
But Steve can't hear you. Steve is too busy twanging the shit out of a crossbow and bolting the shit out of that stupid machine gun dog's face.
Then you hear something which you approximate is the sound of someone yanking out a crossbow bolt from a dog's face, and then repeatedly stabbing it again over and over.
"I think it's dead, Steve." You remove the bag from your head as you talk because it makes it hard to breathe.
"Motherfucker's had it coming for years," Steve says, though it sounds like something catches his attention. "Oh fuck -"
WHACK WUMP TUMBMBMBMBLLLLE SMACK CRUNCH WHAP WAP WHAP SMAKKKKKK
You crawl backwards away from the fight.
You can hear Steve call out to you. "Help me..." but you know that you'll just get yourself killed.
Your hand slips on something, and falls down, into the heat. You yank it back up.
You're half-sitting on the edge of a steep drop into a smoking abyss of heat.