it's really dark and you can't see shitall (COMPLETED)

[Staff Deployment]

3

> Wear bag as hat.



Oh god this is not the time for that wait who are you kidding there's always time for baghats, baghats are the shit

> You don't sound like Steve.



"Roo don't sooond rike Steeeeve," you say in the worst and least accurate asian accent you are capable of.
But Steve can't hear you. Steve is too busy twanging the shit out of a crossbow and bolting the shit out of that stupid machine gun dog's face.
Then you hear something which you approximate is the sound of someone yanking out a crossbow bolt from a dog's face, and then repeatedly stabbing it again over and over.

"I think it's dead, Steve." You remove the bag from your head as you talk because it makes it hard to breathe.

"Motherfucker's had it coming for years," Steve says, though it sounds like something catches his attention. "Oh fuck -"

WHACK WUMP TUMBMBMBMBLLLLE SMACK CRUNCH WHAP WAP WHAP SMAKKKKKK

GRRRRR

> ==>



You crawl backwards away from the fight.

You can hear Steve call out to you. "Help me..." but you know that you'll just get yourself killed.
Your hand slips on something, and falls down, into the heat. You yank it back up.

You're half-sitting on the edge of a steep drop into a smoking abyss of heat.

[PersonPerson]

Crawl away from it then.

[Kíeros]

> Slowly step forward, away from the heat. Call out to the dog to come and get you, and sidestep at the last possible second.

[Amalgam]

> RUN AWAY FROM THE EDGE CAREFULLY (if that's even possible)

[d2r123]

Step one: Find a table
Step two: tip table over and hide behind it
Step three: push the table quickly in the direction of the dog, knocking steve and the dog into the pit.
Steve will be fine.

[PersonPerson]

This^

[Qeztotz]

> Slowly step forward, away from the heat. Call out to the dog to come and get you, and sidestep at the last possible second.

this appears to be the most sensible course of action
second

[Staff Deployment]

2

Call out to the dog

The dog's dead, dude. It had a crossbow bolt repeatedly stabbed through its face.

> Find a table.



You've got to be kidding yourself.

> Call out to the growler.



Still not a great idea.
"Hey! Growly motherfucker! Look over here at the blind chick!"

He ignores you and continues fighting.
You can hear Steve muttering something under his breath.

> Step away from the heat.



Perfect. Great idea.
You step away from the heat.

> ==>



The crashing of Steve and the growler fighting rolls its way over to you. You quickly dash to the side, and they tumble around. An errant claw tears an unexpected gash in your arm and you cry out. Steve doesn't seem to acknowledge this - he keeps muttering to himself, too low for you to hear. You clutch your arm and your entire hand suddenly becomes drenched in sticky warmth.

In your stumbling you smash your foot against something hard. "Fuck!" You lurch forward a bit and land - on - a -
...table. The edge digs into your stomach so you push yourself upright.

> Tip the table over.



You tip the table over. It's slightly more difficult than you imagined. Something falls off and breaks into pieces. Something large and wooden.

> Push the table.



Fuelled almost exclusively through adrenaline, you get a running start and shove the table forward as hard as you can.
You clasp your hands around the edges and run your feet behind you as the big clunky wooden thing scrapes along the ground, pushed by the flat surface of the table.

> ==>



You ram the whole train wreck right into Steve and the growler. Caught by surprise, they are powerless against your grim determination. The coffin spins off to the side and lies discarded and half-open on the floor, although you are only aware of the fact that its weight has suddenly gone and been replaced by two human-sized beings.

You push forward, somehow managing to keep up the speed even with all the weight on the other end. Steve continues to mutter.

The heat increases.

Your arms and legs are about to give way when suddenly the whole thing becomes not quite so heavy. Steve cries out and before you realize what you've done, you can hear his voice recede into the depths. You want to hear him curse your name, or yell at you for betraying him, or even to say that he loves you one last time. But he doesn't say any of that.

The last word to come out of his mouth is... purus.

> ==>



You fall to your knees. The heat has gone away. Everything is silent.

[Amalgam]

> Cry for Steve

Alternately

> Be Steve

[Kíeros]

> Cry out is shock.
(If there is more than one update left, please ignore this next command)
> Hurl yourself into the pit to join him.

[Staff Deployment]

(If there is more than one update left, please ignore this next command)

There are two updates left.
And then that's it, story's over!

[Qeztotz]

There are two updates left.
And then that's it, story's over!

what???!!!
noooooo
awesomeness will disapear from my life!!
bang bang bang bang (head hitting desk)
whhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

as for a command i second kieros'

[Kíeros]

There are two updates left.
And then that's it, story's over!

Yeah, I wasn't sure whether you'd stop on one or zero. As such ignore the second part.

[PersonPerson]

[Still needs silly commands.]

Dance! No one can stop you now.

Edit: ogodogodogod my 999th post wat dooo

[Storm]

>CRY YOUR EYES OUT

[d2r123]

>CRY YOUR EYES OUT

You wonderful grim bastard.

Instantly begin to tell yourself that everything you just saw(or didn’t see) was an illusion. Of course, you have no reason to believe that that was an illusion and you will be deluding yourself into believing that everything you just saw was an illusion. This is to say that you will be lying to yourself and you will know you are lying to yourself, but you will be correct by chance. As a result, any sudden appearances by the recently deceased will clearly be the result of your newfound insanity and should not be trusted. There is no telling what kind of creature is actually in the place of a friendly face. In order to avoid being seen by figments of your imagination, I recommend hiding under a table.

[Staff Deployment]

1

> Cry for Steve.



Naw.

> Cry out in shock.



Naaaww.

> CRY YOUR EYES OUT



NO STOP YOU'RE NOT DOING THAT.
You know what, you're going to just get up and leave. You are sick of this place. You're bleeding from your hand, and your arm, and probably your face but you're not sure if the process of taking out your fucking eyes was particularly violent or not.
You also straight-up murdered a human being about an hour ago, and now you've literally sent your boyfriend to hell.

You pick yourself up from the ground and limp over to where you think the door is. You extend your hand and hit the wall. Not a door. God damn it, you don't have the patience for this shit any more. You slide your hand along the wall until you hit something that feels like a doorframe.

You jiggle the handle.
It's locked, obviously.

You press your back to the door and slide down, defeated.

> ==>



Someone walks up beside you, but you are too tired to react with more than a whisper.

"Steve?"

"Get in the coffin, Shitall."

"What?"

"I swear to Satan I'll slice your fucking skin off! Get in the coffin!"

"What!"

"You sent me to hell. You don't think I put in some self-preserving measures in place to make sure I got back out? It's like you've got no idea who I am. Get in the coffin."

"Who-"

He grabs your arm and drags you across the floor. "Took me a good few weeks to get the whole sibilance under control. Lucky you thought it was just some sort of brain trauma. But Steve's been dead for a year now, Shitall." He grabs your head and bangs it against the floor. "I knew they'd try again, and inevitably fail again. So here I am, making sure this nightmare finishes for good and even going so far as to toss myself into the flames with the beast I've been fighting for so long. But I got out, just now, and even in there for no longer than a minute was a bit more than I'd prefer to bear. And now you. You can't be running around with this experience clawing at the back of your mind for the rest of your life. I'm doing you a favour here, Shitall. Mercy, even. You might say I've developed a sort of mild affection after the twelve months you spent doting on me."

You cannot respond. You hear a crashing - Steve kicking the coffin upright - and then he shoves you in roughly and slams the lid.
A padlock clicks.

[PersonPerson]

Is the coffin at least comfy? If it's comfy enjoy it. If not start screaming or something.

[d2r123]

Shitall:Be in a coffin.
Not much else to do.

Steveontinue the list of events that may or may not lead to your death in a manner which explains the year that went by without Shitall noticing.

I mean, really, any really useful suggestions anyone could come up with would also be spoilers.

Edit: Oh, hey, a smily desided to join us.

[OrangeAipom]

> Shitall: Remember you can't cry your eyes out because you lack eyes.

Steveontinue the list of events that may or may not lead to your death in a manner which explains the year that went by without Shitall noticing.

when steve faded from black to black
the demon had already killed him

[d2r123]

How was the illution continuing while he was in hell?

I guess it JUST WAS, because. The importaint part of my question and a few other questions still stand.

[Qeztotz]

>cry your nonexistent eyes out over the fact that this is the last update!!!!
or
>bumb around in the coffin in an attempt to knock it into steve-daemon

[Kíeros]

>Shitall: Continue to protest repeatedly, hoping to get Steve to chaange his mind about locking her in.
>Steve: Knock her down, and jump after her, so that you can be together forever.

[d2r123]

There is no hole right now.

[Staff Deployment]

> Is the coffin comfy?



Yes.

> ==>



Yes it is.

> Darkness.