The Race... is ON

[PumpkinMan]

I for the first time looked directly at your avatar rather than just peripherally, and have thus only just now realized that your avatar is not in fact of a chocolaty dessert

It is a chocolaty desert. Chocolate coated subjugation.

[P_equals_NP]

Actually that's the buttspider's predatory tactics.
They make you spin in circles until you pass out.
Then they eat you.

Science.

If Chris Hastings doesn't make this canon, it is because he is an awful pearson.

[Dragonstorm]

NEW BBC DOCUMENTARY:

The life of the Buttspider

Narrator: Either Morgan Freeman or Patrick Stewart.

[gimmethegepgun]

Actually that's the buttspider's predatory tactics.
They make you spin in circles until you pass out.
Then they eat you.

Science.

But, as your avatar shows, if the target is too intelligent for that, they attempt an incapacitation via an eyebrowing contest.

No one comes outta that looking good.

[MythicalWashrag]

Narrator: Either Morgan Freeman or Morgan Freeman.

Yes, always.

[recalcitrantIre]

It is a chocolaty desert. Chocolate coated indoctrination.

Fixed for accuracy now would you like some chocolate?

[terribleTrickster]

NEW BBC DOCUMENTARY:

The life of the Buttspider

Narrator: Charles Dutton or Nicholas Cage.

FTFY

[MythicalWashrag]

But, as your avatar shows, if the target is too intelligent for that, they attempt an incapacitation via an eyebrowing contest.

No one comes outta that looking good.

No, then the spider just has a new BFFSIE 4EVARZ.
It's genius.
Either the spider gets food or a friend. It cannot fail.
Evolutionary perfection right there.

[mysteriousOutsider]

Morgan Freeman knows all about buttspiders.

... I don't know what that means.

[gimmethegepgun]

IDE/Theory: One of the Alpha kids prototypes a buttspider.

Discuss.

[killerlamb]

Nic Cage narrates everything. it's all whispering and yelling

[Freack]

Narrator: Either Morgan Freeman or Patrick Stewart.

Do you think we could make both work. Maybe two separate commentaries, one serious and one snarky?

[mysteriousOutsider]

IDE/Theory: One of the Alpha kids prototypes a buttspider.

Discuss.

I already made that manip.

[MythicalWashrag]

IDE/Theory: One of the Alpha kids prototypes a buttspider.

Discuss.

Homestuck stock soars by 300%.

[recalcitrantIre]

IDE/Theory: All of the Alpha kids will prototype buttspiders.

Discuss.

Fixed for truthiness

[CrapofallTrades]

IDE/Theory:All of the Alpha kids have buttspiders

i fixed it to the max

[JordanTH]

what is all this spider nonsense

[MaskedClaus]

Narrator: Either Morgan Freeman or Patrick Stewart.

Both. At the same time. Screaming. Because of the butt spider.

[P_equals_NP]

IDE/Theory: One of the Alpha kids prototypes a buttspider.

Discuss.

Chris Hastings enquires into the shenanigans; Dr Mcninja crossover.

edit: happy 13400 guys.

[mysteriousOutsider]

IDE/Theory: All of the buttspiders have buttspiders.

nope

[bloodyEmissary]

Homestuck stock soars by 300%.

You have just reminded me of something.

Once the timer on the Andrew Hussie Corporate Sell-Out Clock finishes ticking down, will we be able to buy Homestock?
Additionally, at some point in the comic, there needs to be an AUTO-HUSSIE.

[gimmethegepgun]

I already made that manip.

I can't decide if I should be delighted or horrified about that, nor whether I should love you or hate you for doing so.

[kmsumrall]

So what I'm getting from this thread is buttspiders and they itch.

[P_equals_NP]

Homestock?

This pun is pearilously awful.

[Doom Zero]

Nic Cage narrates everything. it's all whispering and yelling

My Biology teacher's voice is pretty close to Nic Cage's. Sometimes I close my eyes and imagine Nic Cage teaching me about biology. Then I laugh in the middle of a conversation about STD viruses and get a detention.

That was the plan. That's what she was there for. To give you an STD. And you got one. HUP-WHAAAAAA.