Forumite Romance XII: A Crackship. Shaken, Not Stirred.

[easykill]

CONTENT ONLY- PAGE 75

My primary thing:


Some doodles that are apparently content.
Dark Coast:

Being creeped on Petrol:

[Chirijiradin]

So, uh. I’ve got some content shenanigans.

…

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EPIC RAP BATTLES OF FORU-*Shot*

OK, not really. Here have an AU that I thought of randomly and sounded like a good idea at the time :P

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Two forumites stand on the field of battle, ready to duel. They have both fought long and hard to get here, and now only 8 remained of the original unknown but absurdly large number of entries into the tournament. Gordon had been wise enough to secure a position as a judge, as had IntoxicatingStarlight and thus had nothing to worry about in the ensuing carnage.

“Well, let’s get this over with, Ying…”

“Yeah…Good luck, Coast.

“You too.”

Quarterfinal Match 1: YingYangGujju VS. Coasterman29

BEGIN

“I think I’ll start things off, draw.” Ying said as he picked up the top card of his deck, contemplating his hand for a second before announcing “I activate Chare of the Light Brigade, which makes me discard the top three cards of my deck, but allows me to search out a Level 4 or lower Lightsworn monster! And would you look at that, I managed to mill Wulf, Lightsworn Beast, which is now summoned due to his effect. Next, I’ll summon a monster in face down defense position, and set two cards. I’ll call it a turn with that.”

“Huh, so you‘ve got a 2100 beatstick on the first turn…ah, whatever. Draw.”

A shocked expression appeared on Coast’s face, soon changing into one of smugness.

“Well, I win.”

“What? You haven’t even done anything!”

“Well I will once I do this…I activate the effect of Gilasaurus, which allows you to special summon one monster from your graveyard. Then I tribute Gilasaurus to summon Catapult Turtle in attack mode! Now, I activate the spell card, Last Will! Since a monster was sent to the graveyard this turn, I can summon a monster with 1500 attack points or less from my deck, and I know just what to choose. I summon Magical Scientist, defense mode! Now I-”

“Woah, hold up there, Coast. That card has been banned since it came out. Sorry Coast, I’ve got to disqualify you. Rules are there for a reason, after all.”

“Aw damn it Gordon…Can I at least finish my combo?”

“I wish I could let you, but I kinda need to stop this duel now. Because Head Judge GX is watching, and I don’t want to get yelled at any more than I do already.”

“FIIIINE.”

“OK, then. Looks like you win, Ying.”

“…Yay?”

Yes. I just went there. Because I felt like it. Plan on more to come.

[dialecticBlight]

SCPStuck, batch 2, has arrived!

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FSSCP-005: The Most Forgettable Man
Item #: FSSCP-005
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-005 is to be kept in a room similar to or identical to a bedroom considered typical of a young adult. The room should have a one-way glass window that is placed at a site heavily trafficked by personnel at Site-██. Food and water should be delivered during standard meal times for employees. If FSSCP-005's records blank, rewrite them immediately using one of the many backups for his files kept at hand. If all of the files vanish, immediately set to work to creating new ones. FSSCP-005 is not any more threatening than a regular human, but has the potential for great harm due to his anomalous properties - in order to prevent a security breach, consult the records that prevent unauthorized and undocumented FSSCPs from leaving Site-██. If at all possible, try to avoid referring to FSSCP-005 on all offical documents besides this one. Do not on any occasion use FSSCP-005's name or ask him what his name is, or else the anomalous properties will be exponentially accelerated.

FSSCP-005's powers do not seem to be controllable and thus it is advised to avoid the subject during any meetings with him. Meetings with FSSCP-005 can be scheduled by any personnel with clearance levels higher than D-class by running a background check with any administrators on-site and scheduling a time.

Description: FSSCP-005 is a young human male with white skin and a small ponytail, and usually prefers to wear casual clothing. FSSCP-005 has stated that he is 'rather ordinary,' and staff on-site have also repeated the notion that he seems fairly forgettable. While FSSCP-005 usually cooperates with staff, he can occasionally get into arguments with staff on-site over his capture.

FSSCP-005's whereabouts were reported to high-ranking employees at the SCP Foundation by █████, who was experiencing massive amounts of tampering with its government documents about the individual. Upon further inquiry and some backup documents being traced, the SCP Foundation tracked the man down at ██████, and immediately confirmed that his name was ██████ ███████, on ██/██/2008. The subject did not resist arrest but expressed confusion at why he was being arrested, and responded with distress after being told of the situation.

The SCP Foundation's work at concealing the incident was significantly shortened after his powers were confirmed to extend to memories as well.

Addendum-005-01: Any mention of FSSCP-005 by name apparently exerts his anomalous powers on every piece of information associated with it. This proved invaluable in containing the information leak about █████, on ██/██/████. While useful for emergencies, however, this tactic works far too slowly to be used in any other capacity. - Dr. ████

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FSSCP-006: The Owl Tengu
Item #: FSSCP-006
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-006 is to be kept in a slightly darkened, sealed area of natural forest just outside of Site-██. The site should be well within the standard patrolling area of personnel and should be coated with security cameras at all times. FSSCP-006's tendencies should be mitigated by the addition of two layers of titanium fencing and roofing all around her enclosure. Any guards stationed near her enclosure should by no means make conversation with her. FSSCP-006 has been known to attack guards if given the chance to, and is not pleased with being captured. There is a chute that should be used to deliver food and water to FSSCP-006. FSSCP-006's diet is consistent with an owl's, so the food should consist of various dead rodents and possibly some insects. A team of agents should clean up any manure in the visit once a season.

A security team should also be posted to the site weekly, to check for weakenings or breaches in the titanium fencing, after an incident on May 12th, 2012.

Description: FSSCP-006 is a woman consistent in description with a Japanese tengu, a long-nosed man with many birdlike features. FSSCP-006, however, has a beak instead of a nose and is similar to owls in many ways. FSSCP-006 displays feats at or above a human level of intelligence, and is known to be able to speak in fluent English. Oddly, FSSCP-006's feathers are green, and she is incapable of flight.

FSSCP-006's anomalous properties surface seemingly at random, and always when she is not being observed by any animals or humans nearby, though security cameras have documented this procedure. FSSCP-006 will stand still for a short period of time, and then will become more and more transparent until she is entirely invisible, and no sign of her presence on-site can be seen. What happens during this time is unknown and further tests have been suspended after the death of █████, but after she resumes visibility, she will never be in the same place that she became invisible at. Dr. ████ has theorized that she has some connection with the spirit world, as in Shinto myths, and that she can freely phase between this realm and the spirit world. However, as this is simply conjecture, only basic precautions should be taken against ████████.

Addendum 006-01: As of ██/██/████, due to a rather mean-spirited prank by a D-class personnel, there has been 1 employee termination and an emergency rescue mission to save FSSCP-003 after being dropped down the food chute. Practical japery like this on-site, even if no harm is caused in the end, will not be tolerated. FSSCP-003 has been relocated following the incident to Site-██, and documentation has been modified accordingly.

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FSSCP-007: The Blue-Eyed Man
Item #: FSSCP-007
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-007 is to be kept in a soundproof room on Site-██, and has been allowed to select the wallpaper, flooring, and furniture for the room upon continued compliance with SCP Foundation authorities. FSSCP-007 recognizes the danger it poses to society and has agreed not to resist capture: however, any D-class personnel who decide to use this opportunity to aggress FSSCP-007 will be located and terminated. Higher-ranking personnel will be immediately expelled from the organization and given a mandatory injection of amnesia-causing drug.

Food should be delivered to FSSCP-007 at standard meal times. At absolutely no time should you make verbal or written contact with FSSCP-007, though books written by deceased authors are fine to show FSSCP-007 and sign language also causes no issues.

Description: FSSCP-007 is a seemingly-ordinary Caucasian male with incredibly bright blue irises that seem to encase the whole eye, above-average eyesight, and black hair. FSSCP-007's powers manifest during extended verbal or written conversations through any medium: after a time, the conversational partner's speech coherence and linguistic skills will rapidly decline, in a manner consistent with speech disorders and multiple forms of dyslexia. This effect wears off after a period of anywhere between two hours to three months, but a diminished effect will be permanent afterwards. Heavy language and speech tutoring has been shown to reverse the effect.

While affected parties will still be coherent after this, care should be taken to avoid either of these forms of conversation and instead stick to sign language, which FSSCP-007 has been taught, to avoid catastrophe.

Addendum 007-01: After the events of ██/██/████, the high-ranking SCP Foundation member ████ ██████ has been temporarily removed from her position to undergo speech therapy after deciding to converse with FSSCP-007 for an extended period of time. Please do not follow her example. - Dr. █████

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FSSCP-008: The Teleporting Clown
Item #: FSSCP-008
Object Class: Keter
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-008 is to be kept under heavy anaesthetics and surveillance at all times. FSSCP-008 is to be kept at a safe distance from any other SCP Foundation subjects, around Site-██. Even if he asks, under no circumstances should FSSCP-008 be given any electronics or, worse yet, a rubber horn. FSSCP-008 subsists on a diet analogous to a human's, so a daily food and water deposit should be sufficient. The room FSSCP-008 is stored in should be made of a hollow block of cast iron with one padlocked door, with only a candle for lighting. In the event of a containment breach, immediately track down FSSCP-008, apply anaesthetic, and return him to his holding as quickly as possible.

Description: FSSCP-008 is a Caucasian male who dresses in a manner similar to juggalos, fans of the FBI-recognized gang group Insane Clown Posse. The only thing anomalous about FSSCP-008's appearance otherwise is the two large bonelike horns growing out of his head. Despite fairly ordinary appearances, FSSCP-008 is highly dangerous. FSSCP-008 is capable of instantaneous teleportation, and while he has caused no deaths so far, has been responsible for teleporting into Prime Minister ███████'s ██████ with a rubber horn in hand, and causing ██ large-scale security breaches worldwide. While FSSCP-008 has not caused any injuries during this, the sheer scale of the breakins have caused it to be necessary to label FSSCP-008 as a Keter object and keep him under extremely heavy surveillance.

Additional suspected security breaches are plentiful, and memory-suppressants have been forced to be dispersed to a large population, which is both costly and time-consuming. In 20██, a large amount of breakins were reported in [REDACTED]: no items from the house were stolen, but residents remember being terrified of a deep male voice threatening them in their sleep, along with the sound of a rubber horn directly afterwards, both clearly attributable to FSSCP-008. In addition, uncovered documents from a century or more ago reported that President [REDACTED] warned of [DATA EXPUNGED].

Even in spite of any meaningful damage, FSSCP-008 is incredibly dangerous. Handle with caution.

Addendum 008-01: As the data is unfounded, the conspiracy theories about President Washington have been purged from the records. There is no substantial data for this theory and without any evidence on hand, it constitutes slander. [REDACTED] has been made in case of emergency, but this is not how to effectively handle an organization so large as the SCP Foundation. - Dr. █████

Addendum 008-02: Evidence suggests that FSSCP-008 himself ended up adding that data to the records. Security protocol has been increased due to this. Even if FSSCP-008's "breaches" result in harmless pranksterism, the potential is highly worrisome. - Dr. █████

Addendum 008-03: I am beginning to suspect that FSSCP-008 only accepts forced holding by the SCP Foundation because it amuses him. Please hold FSSCP-008 under heavy anaesthetic whenever possible - as absolutely no tests have found any way to inhibit FSSCP-008's teleportation during wakefulness, putting him to sleep as long as possible may be the only way to contain him. - Dr. █████

Addendum 008-04: FSSCP-008 teleported into Dr. █████'s work area during the dead of the night, completely asleep. While uncommon, please keep on the lookout for spontaneous disappearances by FSSCP-008 during all times, whether he is awake or not. - Dr. ███████

[Phynicxs]

Oh man, I can't wait to get this thing started. and since I am a jerk you only get short bits and pieces because I panicked and turned one of my CO75 stuff into homework. yeah.... sorry about that.

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Some days I can’t believe how far this city has fallen, corruption leaks from every building, horror waits around every turn. There is always a judge to buy off, a loan shark that needs paying off. You can’t go one block in this city without stumbling over some plot, some secret vice. A lady, (or man if that’s how you swing It.) on every street corner; ducking into back alleys, sleeping with roaches in hopes of making it through another day. Sleaze run the streets, filling it with debauchery, dishonesty, fraud, violence. But maybe it was always this way. You just had to know where to look.
I’m a Bounty hunter, a private policeman, freelance law enforcement, a thief taker, a skip trace; in essence I am a Professional detective.




A private eye if you will.

Of course the office door has to open right as I begin my internal monologue. She is a good looking dame, I hate to be a cliché but all I have are borrowed words of how to describe her. She’s a tigress of a woman, powerful limbs that manage to appear delicate, soft lavender hair, and as I believe the phrase goes “Legs that go on for miles” and then some. She closed the door with a steady snap, stepping over to my desk and placing herself in the seat before it. She flipped her hair over her shoulder and crossed her legs. She was wearing a thick button up coat, rather plain in comparison to the ring on her finger. No dame her age could afford a ring like that, but suckers were born for that Broadway smile - and that day, I was a sucker.

“You are The Private detective?”
“Yes, or at least… that’s what it says on my door.”
She’s all business, before I can even ask her name she’s sliding me two pictures and a wad of cash. But the interesting thing is what she was packin’ in her bag. I’m no expert, but everyone knows what a gun looks like these days.
“I’m guessing you want me to find these two. What’s the story?”
“No story and no names,” she clipped her bag closed with a loud snap. “I trust that will be adequate?” She gazes in my direction, staring at me with a certainty I can’t help but replicate.

She had bad news written on her like the morning addition of the Sunday post. No-one comes to a private detective looking for someone unless the cops couldn’t help them, so either the cops were incompetent, not incompetent just crooked. It was too minor a case to have a reason to search, Possible, but dames who get scammed often give a name at the very least. Or…


“You’re a very private person aren’t you?” I lifted the two pictures up and looked at them quickly; aside from their appearances it didn’t give me too many hints.
“why do you think I came to a private detective?” she glided up out of her seat , taking a few steps toward the exit, “I would assume you were too, or you wouldn’t have ‘Private eye’ written on your door.” swaying her hips merrily she strolled out of my office.
“Now hold on, I never said I took the job.” She threw a teasing glace in my direction.
“You never said you didn’t.” She flashed a sweet smile and with a small click of the door she was gone.

Or they were crooks, or in some way related to crooks. I would like her to an angel but those wings on her back state otherwise. It was women like her who would make men fall, and Oh how far I would fall…







My name Is Dia Jerone, And I am a private eye.

[The Illusive Man]

More Content: Finally, A Second More-Content Page For Me To Rockman Others' Stories And Officialize Them!

The Illusive Man showed up to his office floor. It was a mess. Office parties were like this.

The 75th Page had been celebrated for what appeared to be the 12th Aeon. TIM did not know how long Aeons lasted, but the Forumite Romance Offices apparently had been around for quite some time. He had briefly examined the occurrences of the previous two Aeons, and had tried to work on stomaching the 9th Aeon's occurrences. That way, he could adapt to his job. So far, his mission to adapt had been one of failure.

TIM knew what to do, however. He went into his office, went into his supply closet, and took out several cleaning supplies. So much random pieces of paper on the floor, and what appeared to be metric tonnes of ectofluid. Unfortunately, trying to convert everything into metric had been hard on him. Especially since most people in Hussiedale still didn't attribute their daily activity to such a simple systemme of tens. Alas, TIM bookmarked a calc sheet for every time he heard "inches" or "miles" be said regarding length and distance, respectively. He could convert it to centimetres and kilometres, and try to feel smart in the process.

A story had also been left on the ground. It had belonged to Chirijiradin. At least, TIM presumed it was a story until he realized it was just a replay of what had appeared to be a Yu-Gi-Oh! game in practice so both Ying and Coasterman could go to a tournament. Coasterman lost almost in an instant, because the red mouse had ignored the banlist. TIM used to like the trading card game, until the metagame went completely batshit insane, in his opinion. Not because of Synchros (he loved making a few Synchro Decks himself), but because of the occasional unbanning of an established-broken card. And not once was Chaos Emperor Dragon - Envoy of the End, TIM's favorite card, ever unbanned amongst the fold of "broken" cards. Then again, TIM never owned the card, and never seized the many chances he had of attaining it. Since TIM never played competitively, the most said card would probably be used for was that of a treasured bookmark. Which was probably its only fate to those who legitimately owned the card.

At any rate, TIM archived the story. He had also archived a story where rogue_of_void and Intoxicating Starlight were confronting each other with Pokemon. Of course, knowing a lot of the Pokemon metagame, TIM could never break it to ROV that Luxray was nowhere close to viable in UnderUsed, where Togekiss reigned in the current generation. Why Togekiss and a couple other Gen V Pokemon weren't in BorderLine already according to Smogon was not quite known to TIM. Nevertheless, he shrugged, like usual. Oh well. At least there would be something humorous with the hoarding of all these seemingly "scrapped" tales. TIM had an idea, but then lost it while he proceeded to continue his voluntary maintenance of the floor where his office resided.

After TIM finished cleaning, he decided to order some pizza on account of his hunger. While dialing the number, he remembered that his future self told him he owed Phy and IS breakfast on two separate occasions in the future. While doubtful, TIM ruminated on the thought as he began to process his order to the call recipient...

[Reality Glitch]

sta.sh/023cmu8dwqzl

From some reason I can't get .swf to work here.

[typoAdventure]

Finally!
Ok guys I'm taking over
all the matesprits will be mine

Yiingbro, be my matesprit

Kraiine, be my matesrpit
Will edit this later, I will have you ALL
nice content everybody; i was too excited and posted some of mine before I read everything...

[The Illusive Man]

More Content: I Had a Good JungleSticks Game Today in League of Legends, So Now I'm In a Fair Mood To Write Something

FUTURE TheIllusiveMan has decided to pester CURRENT TheIllusiveMan

CTIM: ...what do you want this time?
FTIM: You got IS and Phynicxs their breakfast pizzas in the past, right?
CTIM: Duh. Just finished the order to get them their favorites. Which, by the way, I guessed off the top of my head.
FTIM: Lemme guess, you got Phy a Meat Lover's and IS a standard Pepperoni?
CTIM: OF COURSE you'd know. I practically changed the future by changing the past.
FTIM: Good, you're learning.
FTIM: Now, have you slept with Phy yet?
CTIM: Oh, heavens no.
FTIM: Fair enough. I don't expect you to get feelings for her until you most deeply regret it. After all, I'm you from the future.
CTIM: Well, at least my real name isn't Phil. Otherwise this would get really boring really quick.
FTIM: lol ok
CTIM: Anyway, after my pizza delivery request was complete, I decided to get a game of League of Legends on board. I love jungling as Fiddlesticks. Although, I do so because I kinda suck as every other jungler.
CTIM: You probably already know about my Jungle Kassadin shenanigans. His early game blows too hard for him to jungle. He practically has to get Flash alongside his ultimate, Riftwalk, in order to not be underwhelming. Then again, anyone can jungle better than Master Yi. I'm sure of it.
FTIM: Yup.
CTIM: Anyway, please stop insisting I sleep with Phy. It would be rude to typo, my mentor. And I've already had a few incidents compromising his kismeses and matespritships as it is.
FTIM: Well, if you were me, what would you have done to fix the past?
FTIM: Not rhetorical, just wondeirng.
CTIM: Well...
CTIM: First thing I'd do is...
CTIM: TALK TO YING MORE LIKE A BOSS
CTIM: APPLY FOR PROMOTION EARLIER LIKE A BOSS
FTIM: I think I get your notion like a boss
CTIM: ...
CTIM: You ruined my groove.
FTIM: That's my job, as future you.
CTIM: /signnnnnnnn
FTIM: You're going to be over Vriska like you were over sliced bread in the next few months.
CTIM: Huh? Why?
FTIM: Well, you already have that Eridan Fleet, right?
CTIM: Yeah.
CTIM: EridanRoxy and Kanaya Eridan()Rose
FTIM: Two matespritships, one locked by auspistice. Seems to still be stagnant here. Keep going.
CTIM: EridanHussie
FTIM: Drop that like it's hot.
CTIM: Really?
FTIM: Really.
CTIM: Uh, okay. Uh... EridanGamzee. Their ancestors were dicks to each other if I recall...
FTIM: Sounds more practical than EridanFeferi, but then again so does anything to be honest.
FTIM: Keep going.
CTIM: SEVERAL moirallegiances. Uh, EridanJohn, EridanKanaya (as is part of the auspistice requirements), and... uh... crap. I had a third one, I just forgot.
FTIM: Don't worry, I'll remember it for you.
FTIM: EridanKarkat, btw.
CTIM: 'Kay, thanks.
CTIM: And then EridanEveryone else/everyone else
FTIM: Still amusing to this day.
FTIM: I'd love to stay and chat, but...
FTIM: Future typo needs me.

FUTURE TheIllusiveMan stopped pestering CURRENT TheIllusiveMan

CTIM: Well, the pizza should be here in five more minutes. I guess I'll wait for it. Like a boss.

[Reality Glitch]

http://sta.sh/01mtz413figg

[typoAdventure]

Iso, be my matesprit

Phy, be my matesprit oh wait Fuck yeah

Monkeysky, be my matesprit

[Monkeysky]

Time to get my ugly ass into everything

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FSSCP-1337: Creeperfaec Hatman
Item #: FSSCP-1337
Object Class: Less than Safe
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-1337 is to be kept at Site-██, in a room roughly the size of a broom closet. The subject is to be provided with a clean living environment, and supplies and products designed for the keeping and maintenance of hats. FSSCP-1337 has proven to be trusted with internet access, as it is seemingly unable to make outgoing posts.

Description: FSSCP-1337 appears to be a human-like hominid with incredibly pale skin and hair. Despite identifying itself as a male, the subject displays no genitals, and is lacking the chromosomes used for determining gender. Growing from the subjects skull is a strangely shaped crest covered in a thick layer of grey, fuzzy skin. It has been shown that, when needed, the subject is capable of achieving unsteered flight with this crest. The subject's facial structure, while approximating that of a human, has several major differences. One eye-lid is shaped extremely loose, while the other eye bulges almost entirely out of the skull, and does not blink. The nose is abnormally large, and without nostrils (though the subjects appears to still somehow maintain a sense of smell) and can change size by a factor of two inches rapidly. The subject has no lips to speak of, and very little muscle control in the mouth, leaving it constantly open, and revealing the subject's five teeth. An interesting note is that, when alarmed, confused, or idle, the subject is capable of making its teeth flash vivid colours. The subject appears to wear a suit of the same colour as the crest, as well as a deep red bow tie. This outfit is not presumed to change at any time. The bow tie has mysteriously changed into a similarly coloured neck tie. Further research is suggested.

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FSSCP-666: Forumite Romance Thread
Item #: FSSCP-666
Object Class: Euclid
Special Containment Procedures: FSSCP-666 is to be contained on a Foundation controlled server. Only approved SCP's are to be allowed contact, if it is believed that it will assist in their containment.

Description: FSSCP-666 is a web page hosted on the ██ Forums, apparently intended for members of the forum to form mock relationships with one another. When a subject is exposed to the object, however, its anomalous properties become more obvious. The subject will gain awareness of relationships that are either insignificant or non-existent in mainstream society, and refer to these with unusual jargon, such as [REDACTED]. Over time, the subject's psychological capability for normal relationships will be permanently damaged, often leading to a fixation on relationships revolving entirely on mutual physical abuse. On one occasion, a test subject was known to have had a romantic relationship with a piece of furniture.

Every so often, another effect will become apparent, in which, for a long amount of time, all users of the subject will develop a compulsion to only communicate when accompanied by a large-scale work of creative media, and the activity between subjects will slow considerably during this time.

Too lazy to addend. Add to these if you want.

[Reality Glitch]

I noticed that IS Pet, so...

[NeoDarklight]

I drew my forumite self as practice with Paint.NET. It took me ten minutes. Here's what I produced-



Also, I used a tablet.

[NeoDarklight]

Here was my second attempt after I learned more about my art program. I used a mouse this time.



...This one also took me about 10-15 minutes.

...Now go ship me.

[Phynicxs]

More shitty fiction? why yes, yes indeed. I finished a few things I had kicking around. feel free to disregard any and all of it.

-Current Phynicxs - Now; joined-

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CP: Hey future me, you there?
-Future Phynicxs- 35 minutes in the future: joined-
FP: Yeah, I’m here.
CP: so what do you mean I cause the universe to gain cancer!
FP: honestly I don’t know, I’m almost at the 2 hour mark but I have no Idea what future me was on about, or I guess current me..
CP: so what? Was I making a prank call to the past?
FP: I don’t know, but in order for the time stream to stay constant that conversation has to happen.
CP: so it’s like a self fulfilling prophecy? Because I got the message it has to happen?
FP: yeah, I think it’ll be a stable loop.
CP: that’s kind of bullshit. :T Is that kind of loop possible? Wouldn’t that loop fall apart?
FP: I don’t know, the universe hasn’t exploded yet. But then again It may not have been from me. Someone could have taken my computer away and been trolling, or It could have been from a doomed timeline.
CP: a doomed timeline e_e
FP: but we don’t know that for sure honestly, I mean the other thing is way more likely.
CP: I don’t know how I feel with having me in a doomed timeline.
FP: Don’t worry about it, when you get to this point you’ll know for sure.
FP: it could also be someone hacking into the servers to play a prank.
CP: I guess so…
FP: you know actually maybe I said it because when I look back I was getting wildly out of hand.
CP: but shenanigans!
FP: Karkat shenanigans.
CP: well when you put it that way…..
FP: yep :3
CP: yeah…
FP: so do I ask you how your day was or…?
CP: NO >U
FP >O
CP: >P
FP: >0
CP: 0_0
FP: >^.__. ^<
-Future Phynicxs- 22 minutes in the future: left-
CP: (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
CP: Aw….
-Future Phynicxs- 23 minutes in the future: joined-
FP: ┬─┬ノ(゜-゜ノ)
-Future Phynicxs- 23 minutes in the future: left-
CP: pfft.
-Current Phynicxs- Now: left-

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Tim leaned against the counter; he was waiting for his pizza in the break room. It was rather quiet; the only people in here besides himself were two of the newer employees, Payne and Glitch. Payne was sipping on a coffee, apparently on break as Glitch sat on the other side of the table. Glitch stared profusely at Payne, twitching, sometime taking in a breath of air as if to say something, but thinking better of it he would let his head fall back into his crossed arms and start staring again. After a few times of this happening Payne looks up from his coffee to catch the kid staring.
“Do I have something on my face or what?”
“Kind of, but I just wanted to ask you something.”
“Ask away then.” Payne turned away to take a large sip of his coffee as Glitch started to awkwardly explain his question, tripping over his words as they fell out in a jumble obviously feeling nervous. Payne sighed and put down his drink.
“Look I won’t laugh alright, just ask already.”
“Do your horns really taste like candy corn?” Glitch blurted, blinking innocently.

TIM choked into his cup. Did Glitch really just ask that question?
Payne blinked and shifted uncomfortably “uhh… I don’t think so, but then again I don’t go around tasting peoples horns.”
“Can I check?”
“uhhh-“
He reached out and griped Payne’s horns tightly, the troll froze in shock. Glitch pulled Payne slightly forward; Payne complied easily looking kinda nervous.
“H-hey!”
Glitch stands up from his chair still pulling Payne forward slightly. The troll was kind of panicking, flailing his arms uncertainly. TIM stepped in. it was obvious that Payne was uncomfortable with the situation and he wasn’t going to let a fellow coworker feel that way without stepping in.

“Excuse me.” TIM stepped over beside glitch, moving his hands to tug gently at the kids wrists. “I believe Payne is uncomfortable with this arrangement.”
Glitch let go immediately taking a quick step away from TIM who still had a hold of his wrists.
“AH!- sorry!” TM found glitches sudden outburst rather unnecessary but he shrugged it off, letting go of the kid’s wrists. Glitch retreated a few steps looking uncomfortable. Payne sighed, sinking back into his chair.
“No problem, I was just worried you were going to break them.” Glitch looked alarmed.
“I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?” He frowned, looking down and shuffling his feet guiltily.
“No, you can’t really feel anything in the tip. It’s not really sensitive; it’s the base that’s sensitive.” Payne rubbed the tips of his horns carefully.

“Oh, and here I thought it was the other way round.” Payne sputtered choking on his coffee, quickly moving out into the corridor.
“That’s not funny Kraine!”
TIM could hear her chuckling as she stepped down the hall. Payne grumbled and sat down in his chair.
“Anyways, the tip is more easily broken. And my horns would probably taste like sopor, seeing as I sleep in the stuff.”
“Oh.”
The two feel into a silence, awkwardly looking away from each other. TIM took a sip from his cup quietly. And the room was at peace until Glitch started his act over again. Staring and twitching and almost building up the nerve to ask a question. Payne sighed, putting his hand to his face.

It was going to be a very long break.

Drabble Drabble.

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Lunar slumped in his chair, something was wrong. He was the pimp of hearts and he shouldn’t be focusing on just one person, and yet- he found himself thinking back on that person a lot, he found his eyes following them when they entered a room. He found himself going slightly out of his way for them, listening to them, maybe even… pitying them? He shook his head. He pitied them yes, but sharing his problems? No. besides, they didn’t seem to have any real flaws, they were practically perfect. So why was he worrying? He turned his thoughts to the other end of the spectrum. They had had a disagreement yes, but he didn’t hate them. They weren’t really that hate-able. And getting a sore jaw was never anything new to him, heh. But… He turned in his chair, twisting into a new position. And yet why was he thinking about them all the time? Why did he listen so much whenever they were mentioned? His mind slipped around the issue, prodding at it hopelessly.

In the depths of his mind an old saying popped up unbidden. “It’s pity, it’s why we can stick out our necks and let someone close to us, it’s why we can let someone open up to us and not cull them. It’s the gateway to love.” His stomach dropped, he didn’t. He couldn’t. Not him. Not the pimp of hearts. He can’t have fallen for someone. He was just curious, nothing more. A passing obsession that would soon fade, He didn’t love that guy! That self righteous, self absorbed…. He slumped onto the desk in front of him. He did and it was so obvious to him now. The pimp of hearts had fallen. He had fallen and he wasn’t sure he wanted to get back up.

And now a spade fic.

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You carefully glide around your kismesis, it’s one of the rare occasions when it’s just the two of you and she looks more than excited about it. She levitates off the ground to meet you.
“Meeting me at eye level? I guess this is one thing we can see eye to eye on.”
She snorts trying to keep a small laugh from slipping out.
“Blight no.”
“I know, I deserve twenty lashes for that….I guess they’d be eye lashes.”
“No, Blight I mean it”
“Sorry, don’t you like all this Lowbrow humour?”
“Blight don’t I will hurt you”
“Socket to me”
“oh god”
“Don’t make a seen Ver, it would be very troublink.”
“I’m dying”
“I don’t want there to be a DiVISION between us, let’s just drink some Eyes-Tea”
“Blight stop”
“ and your usually so OPTICmistic”
“I can’t”
“ well I’ve gone and made a spectacles of myself here, ”
“Blight don’t, Stop.”
“Don’t stop? I guess I’m just blind to your wants, you didn’t seen rather EX-SIGHTED for these puns, but okay then”
She pounced; honestly you kind of admired how patient she had been. You slip quickly to the side; your skill with levitation is much greater than hers and so you dodged around her easily. You start up a bit of an aerial tango, or bullfight, it all depends how you look at it…. Damn it you’ve been spending too much time around phy, these vision based metaphors just make you think up more puns. You list lazily to the left, as ver rockets toward you, this isn’t even a challenge. You respect ver but truly she is terrible at flying. You slip around as Ver tries to tackle you, looking at her slow and clunky arc back around to try again. You decide you need to test something; you glide silently closer to the wall.
“I guess it’s pretty clear you don’t special-eyes in flying”
She zooms after you, at the last second you push yourself up watching ver flitter harmlessly beneath you. She promptly crashes into the wall.
You smirk; you get ready with a cutting retort when she pounces off the wall towards you. Your eye widens in shock as she crashes both of you down to the floor. She hovers over you slightly smirking.
“That was certainly eye opening,” she groans in pain, flumping down to lean on you.
“I’m dead, you killed me.”
Her weight is something of a bother, pinning you to the floor, you twitch uncomfortably.
“I see, I guess it’s time eye put a lid on all this then.” You close your eye. It’s quiet for a few seconds before she sags into you entirely. You give a noise of discomfort, she’s squashing you. You smack her with one of your spines, she doesn’t move. You smack her harder. She murmurs quietly that she is dead. You poke her, having to move your spine awkwardly to do so. You don’t do it hard enough to gain her attention. You try to levitate, but find you can’t.
You start to panic a little.
You feel yourself getting ready to give out a large audio shock-wave before you remember a little of your psychic training that phy was so set upon. You force yourself to calm down, blinking quietly. You focus on pushing ver sidewards, off of you. You remember how easily you gave phy tons of bruises by accident. You give ver a slight push, her Head cracks into the floor.
You freeze. Shit. Phy had a bit of defense against psychic abilities. You hover carefully above Ver as she lets out a string of curses. At least she’s alive. Her wing buffets you out of the way, as she skids to her feet.
“You’re going to pay for that.”
“That line couldn’t have been any cornea” She yowls in rage and lunges at you.

Today is going to be fun.

[typoAdventure]

Dia, will you be my matesprit?

PI, will you be my matesprit?

DD360, will you be my matesprit?

Also, congratulations everybody, I am amazed. Phy, you made me laugh in a public place. No, you made me snort in a public place. Thank. Thanks for that.
By the way, past/future logs are cool, but 69 was six pages ago?

[Reality Glitch]

Ectobiologically spawn ALL the gene combos!
ALL of them: part 1;

Show Expirement Log

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Reality Glitch's Expirement-1001, Date ██-██-██
Translated and dequirked by █████'█ ███

██:██
Discovery of "Ecto-" biology, while having nothing to do w/ ghosts, has proved fruitful in synthesising lifeforms w/o having to partake in more "traditional" means of reprodution. In order to properly preform any expirements, I had to collect genetic samples from willing partisapants.

██:██
Ectobiology is capable of hastened justation; the machines used give birth to the so named "Ectobabies" w/i seconds of inputing the genetic material. First Ectobaby was synthesised by combining the dragonic portions of Subjet-FR1's and my DNA. This and all future results will be photographed, w/ the photos paced into diagrams like the one below.

Further entities spwaned in this manner will be seprate expirements in there own right.

Reality Glitch's Expirement-1002, Date ██-██-██
Translated by ███'███ ███, Dequirked by █████'█ ███

██:██
Second ectobaby was synthesised from combing the nondragonic portion of subject-FR1's and my DNA.

EX-1002 is genetically identical to own gardian. To prevent any hypothesised paradoxes, EX-1002 has been sent back in time.

Reality Glitch's Expirement-1003, Date ██-██-██
Translated by ███'███ ███, Dequirked by █████'█ ███

██:██
Third ectobaby was synthesised from combing the dragonic portion of subject-FR2's and my DNA.

EX-1003 was born underdeveloped. Cybernetic prostetics have been grafted for optimised survival.

Reality Glitch's Expirement-1004, Date ██-██-██
Translated by ███'███ ███, Dequirked by █████'█ ███

██:██
Forth ectobaby was synthesised from combing the nondragonic portion of subject-FR2's and my DNA. This proved to be difficult do to subject-FR2's minimal heiratitary inpurities. But a viable sample was obtained none the less.

EX-1004 appears to be a pureblood ████████ as my hypothesised biological mother. More test are needed, but I think I can restart this lost race.

(( P.S. I'm using the TRANSCRIBED excuse for my imperfect exicusion of my first language. ))

[typoAdventure]

Ek, will you be my matesprit?

Quick! Easykill! Grab onto my swag!

ADVENTURE~

[The Illusive Man]

More Content: Basically More Filler To Help Boost Morale

The pizza got delivered in time.

TIM paid for it, and began distributing the pizza. He got enough for three people, getting two pizzas each (two for himself, of course, because starvation sucks). His guessing of Phynicxs and Intoxicating Starlight's favorite pizzas - Phy a Meat Lover's, IS a Pepperoni - would have to be put to the test. He carefully placed them in the fridge. TIM also had Pepperoni pizzas, but had added Tomatoes and Cilantro on his to tell the difference between the four pizzas. He began to chow down on his pizzas in the break room, because that was the room closest to a refridgerator for all the other pizzas. Of course, he paid and tipped the gentleman responsible for bringing the pizzas to the break room.

He kept track of who else was in the building, making sure nothing awry would come forth. Glitch and Payne had already departed after what had transpired. If TIM wasn't socially inept, the situation could've been a lot smoother. Speaking of, TIM forgot to write a note for each of them! He didn't want to go to his own office yet, for fear of forgetting. However, he found a pen nearby. The level of convenience was mixed, as he began to wonder if it had any ink. It did. He decided to use it to label the pizzas' owners, as well as say "from TIM" below the labels. He wasn't too fond of abbreviating it like that, but everyone else did it, so he stuck with it.

Sighing with intense relief, TIM resumed his eating. He then wondered if he should play some League of Legends to pass the time before Ying or typo assigned him any work. He was at least three hours early, so he decided to consume some time.

[YingYangGujju]

Well, I was intending to add some visual aids with this, but, nothing is coming to mind so I guess I'll just post it as it is:
Show Dialoglog:

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Ying: Typo, I can't thank you enough for bringing her back, bro.
Typo: It's no problem, man. I mean, I couldn't just let her keep going in this condition.
Ying: But, still, I owe you. A lot. Especially after what she did to your eye...
Typo: Seriously, bro, don't worry about it. Just take care good care of her now, alright?
Ying: Alright, will do.
Typo: Good. Now, I'm off to see Ver, I'll catch up with you later.
Ying: Alright, I'll see you later, bro.
Typo: Alright, Kraine, I'm heading out, I'll come check up on you later.
*Kraine glares menacingly at Typo and growls*
Typo: ...Umm...
Ying: Yeah, she'll catch up with you later. And, once again, I apologize for the black eye on Kraine's behalf.
Typo: It'll be perfectly fine. I think the swelling is starting to go down. It probably won't even be noticable by the time I get to Ver's. See ya later.
*Typo leaves*
Kraine: Geez, what a pain in the ass.
Ying: Hey, Typo's a great guy. As great as they come, in fact.
Kraine: He interfered with my and Pack's kismessitude.
Ying: He saved your life.
Kraine: ...I could have caught her...
Ying: You would have died.
Kraine: …
Ying: Look, all I'm saying is that despite being a new recruit, typo is an outstanding nav-pilot, excellent peace-keeper and an even better person, in general. I know how much you hate to depend on people for help, but, sometimes you have to and typo is the most dependable person I have ever met in my life. Just...try to be more grateful to him, alright?
*Kraine looks away and scoffs in an attempt to brush off the current topic*
*Ying changes topic*
Ying: Anyways, wow, Pack really did a number on you this time, huh?
Kraine: Please, if you think this is bad just wait until you see what I do to her once I get a hold of her again.
Ying: …
Kraine: I swear, next time I won't let her get away and she is going to wish she was dead...Well, dead again, but you get my point-
Ying: Kraine, stop...
Kraine:What, Ying? I know she's your moirail and all, but she's still my kismesis and further more a pirate so, I'm sorry, but, there is no way I'm showing here any mercy next time I see her-
Ying: Kraine, I'm serious. I...I think you should stop.
Kraine: Stop what?
Ying: ...Stop going after Pack...please...
Kraine: ...Ying...what are you-
Ying: Kraine, I really think you should stop going after her? I mean, look at yourself. You almost died out there this time but you were lucky that typo was there to rescue, but, next time you might not be so lucky...I just don't want to see you get hurt anymore...or worse...
Kraine: …
Ying: …
Kraine: ...Your trying to protect her, aren't you?
Ying: What?
Kraine: Pack. You're trying to protect her from me because she's your moirail you know I'm getting close .
Ying: No, Kraine, that's not-
Kraine: For god's sake, Ying, she's a pirate. Do you know how many innocent people she has killed? You have to stop trying to protecting her, Ying, it's just not-
Ying: I'M NOT TRYING TO PROTECT HER, I'M TRYING TO PROTECT YOU!
Kraine: …
Ying: God damn it, Kraine, is it so hard to believe that I don't want you to get hurt anymore. I want you to stay safe, here with me. I barely ever get to see you anymore, Kraine, and when I do, you're always seriously injured. For once I just want you here with me, by my side, uninjured...I miss you, Kraine, I really do...
Kraine: Ying, stop. I can't deal with all of this right now. I already have enough on my plate with Nam, Gordon, Milk and all those guys constantly bugging me.
Ying: ...What are you talking about?
Kraine: They just keep contacting me up constantly to talk and stuff and I'm getting kinda tired of it.
Ying: Well, why don't you just tell them you don't want to talk then, huh?!?!
Kraine: Ying, what the hell?!?!
Ying: What, so you talk to these guys all the time and all I get is one little letter a week????
Kraine: Ying, calm the hell down, it's not that big a deal!
Ying: ...Not that big a deal? Y'know what, you're right, it's not that big a deal. So I guess I should just start chatting up everyone, too. In fact, the other day I saw Ver and she was talking about how we haven't spoken in forever, maybe I'll start talking to her all day long.
Kraine: Alright, no you're just being ridiculous-
Ying: I haven't spoken to IS in a while either, maybe I should spend a couple days talking to her, too.
Kraine: Okay, Ying I get your-
Ying: Y'know I heard OA is up to some new things lately, perhaps I kill some more time I could be spending talking to you catching up with her.
Kraine: I swear to god, Ying, shut the hell-
Ying: Or maybe I should start talking to Pack more often. I'm sure we can find a lot more to talk about.
Kraine: ...You've been talking to Pack?
Ying: What?
Kraine: You just said you've been talking to Pack. Have you?
Ying: That's not what we're talking about right-
Kraine: YING! Have you been talking to Pack?
Ying: ...Once a month I get a letter from her sentfrom an unmarked terminal.
Kraine: Are you kidding me!?!?! Why did you never tell me about this!?!?!
Ying: Because I knew you react like this!
Kraine: Ying, we could have used this to have caught up to her by now, what were you thinking!?!?!?!
Ying: I don't know, I was just trying to protect you.
Kraine: Well, maybe I don't want you trying to protect me anymore!
Ying: ...What are-
Kraine: I'm saying...that I'm done. With you trying to “protect” me, with your jealousy, with you going behind my back to contact Pack, all of it. I'm just...done.
Ying: Kraine, are you serious?
Kraine: …
Ying: No, come on, please, don't do this, Kraine. Please, don't do this to me right now. I'm begging you...just...please...
Kraine: ...I'm sorry, Ying...
*Ying stands there for a second, turns and walks away*
Ying: Well, I guess since everything else in my life has been going horribly wrong this was bound to happen...Goodbye, Kraine...Please...stay safe...
Kraine: ...Everything else has been...? Wait, what do you mean by everything else is going wrong?
*Ying is already gone*
---
What actually happened:

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Kraine is going to study abroad for the next couple of months so she will have limited interwebs access and won't be able to draw shenanigans, so we decided to end it. :B

Also, dang guys, this page is going fast! keep it up, guys!
@Neo: Hey, Neo, I was thinking that maybe you should combine those two back to back posts you made. By double-posting like that you're kinda unnecessarily deprive someone of a slot on CO-75. :B

[typoAdventure]

Petrol, will you be my matesprit?

Reality Glitch, will you be my matesprit?

[tiiamat]

I hate to interrupt this content page, but I have an announcement!
I'm looking to bring back the Forumite Romart
DATING SIMULATOR!

What we need is an artist or two, one for backgrounds and one for characters!
Obviously with such a loose need surely we have plans, don't we? Not entirely, but there is no intended rush to do this and since the previous attempt at this project failed before it really took off this means the only way we can really go is up! Me and Viaeus have been discussing it and ultimately plan to be the writers and scripters for this little game. If you have the capabilities to draw either people or backgrounds on the PC please PM me!
If we can get an artist or two, then we'll begin work on the major parts as opposed to the bare bones idea!

[The Illusive Man]

More Content: What are these bios for, exactly?

FSCP XIII-2: Leader of Cerberus
Item #: FSCP XIII-2
Object Class: Jungler
Special Containment Procedures: FSCP XIII-2 is to be kept at Site [REDACTED]. The subject seems to have garnered a peculiar fascination with League of Legends, a popular online video game for the PC and Mac. It particularly enjoys most things equally, although [REDACTED] is to be kept away from him at all times, and not referenced on the grounds that it triggers a psyche loop. Otherwise, no real specific conditions are to be placed for FSCP XIII-2.

Description: FSCP XIII-2 is a [REDACTED] with [REDACTED]. Honestly, there's not much to write home about for this particular subject. Seems to be mentally damaged by loneliness, though. Hallucinogens recommended so it thinks there are other people around at all times, but other than that, FSCP XIII-2 hasn't talked much about its "Cerberus" actions lately. Often uses large vocabulary, it is difficult to understand FSCP XIII-2 because the subject is not very consise. That said, underestimating its intelligence is a sure way to piss it off. Again, FSCP XIII-2's [REDACTED] gives [REDACTED] percent of its personality away from the jump.

[typoAdventure]

CrimsonLunar, Pimp of Hearts, will you be my matesprit?

Coast, will you be my matesprit?

Payne, will you be my matesprit?

Neo D, will you be my matesprit?

I'd like to try my hand at spriting. Who do you need?

[Reality Glitch]

[IMG]

You got my hair wrong, and I be dragon, and god teir.



It's poor quality on purpose. It's funnier that way.