GULPERQUEST

[Togeyosh]

> Your loss of a hat is a very terrible thing. Lament over this loss.

[Deif]

>Figure out which way is down. Go the other way.

You manage to hit DRY LAND. Eventually.

> Your loss of a hat is a very terrible thing. Lament over this loss.

You are not SENTIENT enough to grieve. But you shed a single tear, though you don't know why.


SO! What's this place? It looks like it might have food...

>_

[mythLeader]

>Enter!

If you have a sensitive sense of smell, >Go to where you smell the most food.

EDIT: In fact, if you can smell any trace of the thing you were trying to eat before (i.e. the water mage), go toward it. That was tasty, and you want to try to eat it again!

[I-gor]

>Accidentally enter a pet store_

[Deif]

>Enter!

If you have a sensitive sense of smell, >Go to where you smell the most food.

EDIT: In fact, if you can smell any trace of the thing you were trying to eat before (i.e. the water mage), go toward it. That was tasty, and you want to try to eat it again!

>Accidentally enter a pet store_

You smell some kind of food here! Time to EAT. You hop into the LARGE STORE.


"Well well, what have we here? Oooh. Free gulper for the kiddies!"
Some ruffian has GRABBED you!


O'GULPER: You are now captive. While your PRIMITIVE BRAIN tries to find a way to escape, you hear sounds...


A MYSTERIOUS FIGURE has entered the room.
Shopkeep: "Your excellency! How may we serve you today?


MYSTERIOUS FIGURE: "It is decreed, today is CHEESE DAY. Feed all of the animals cheese.
Shopkeep: "B-but yesterday was cheese day too, your extravagentness!"
MYSTERIOUS FIGURE: "EVERY DAY IS CHEESE DAY."

You overhear this SURREAL CONVERSATION. Not that you understand any of it. Except for Cheese. That means food... you think.
>_

[I-gor]

>Mysterious Figure: Reveal your identity! Also, reveal military plans to conquer every nation on the planet and to create a space program_

[mythLeader]

>Hop excitedly and croak (or whatever noise gulpers make) at the mention of FOOD.

[amymist]

>Attempt to make some kind of noise. Perhaps you can coerce someone into feeding you.
Then you can grab them by the hand, and perhaps eat them as well.

[PersonPerson]

Scream

[Togeyosh]

So gulpers are a known species that can be domesticated in this world. Wonder what makes this one so different?

> Make whatever noise you make. Get attention. That might get you food!

[Deif]

So gulpers are a known species that can be domesticated in this world. Wonder what makes this one so different?

> Make whatever noise you make. Get attention. That might get you food!

Scream

>Attempt to make some kind of noise. Perhaps you can coerce someone into feeding you.
Then you can grab them by the hand, and perhaps eat them as well.

>Hop excitedly and croak (or whatever noise gulpers make) at the mention of FOOD.

>Mysterious Figure: Reveal your identity! Also, reveal military plans to conquer every nation on the planet and to create a space program_

O'GULPER: You make your gulper sounds. REEEP REEEP REEEP REEP! You want FOOD.


??: "WHAT IS THIS!? A GULPER!? IN MY SINZERI!!!!? They are not state-sponsored pets!"
Storekeep: "So sorry, your Coachness, but this one wandered in."


??: "...MOMENTS before I, the great and powerful President for Life Lord King Platinum Credit Card Rewards Head Chief Chocolateir General ZACHARIAS von Nicklepantsbottom, entered your humble and entirely legal establishment!?"
Storekeep: "...Yes, your Rewardsness."
ZACHARIAS: "..."


ZACHARIAS: "HE MUST BE TESTED. LET US SEE IF HE UNDERSTANDS THE SINZERI WAY OF LIFE, THE WAY OF THE CHEESE..."


ZACHARIAS: "Excellent."


ZACHARIAS: "THIS GULPER IS YOUR NEW MAYOR. ZACHARIAS HAS SPOKEN."

Well, that just happened.
>_

[mythLeader]

>That hand right next to your face smells like cheese. EAT IT!

[McBatman]

>Switch characters

[PersonPerson]

Eat the hand. Wear the hat.

[stagnantAntler]

Eat the hand. Wear the hat.

Oh hell. You know what? Eat the hat too while you're at it

[LaserShark]

>Wander off and eat the discount puppies on aisle 7.

[amymist]

>Become a dictator. All food is carefully rationed, except of course, your own.

[I-gor]

>Plan executions for those subversive characters who lack hats_

[Deif]

Note by Author: I've not forgotten about this adventure but right now I'm kind of busy so I'll try to update tomorrow or tuesday when I get some free time.

[Deif]

>That hand right next to your face smells like cheese. EAT IT!

CHOMP!
O'GULPER: You suddenly chomp on the cheese-smelling hand!
ZACHARIAS: "IT BURNSSSSSS!"

Eat the hand. Wear the hat.

Oh hell. You know what? Eat the hat too while you're at it

O'GULPER: On second thought, that hat looks tasty. CHOMP!
ZACHARIAS: "What!? NOOOOO!"

>Wander off and eat the discount puppies on aisle 7.

>Become a dictator. All food is carefully rationed, except of course, your own.

>Plan executions for those subversive characters who lack hats_

O'GULPER: You speed off, planning your primitive dictatorship thanks to your INGESTED HAT. You hop off in search of more food.
ZACHARIAS: "...A COUP! This will not go unpunished..."

>Switch characters

You are now OTHURA, Beautiful and Sexy goddess of passion, love, art, music, and bow-chicka-wow-wow.


...Just kidding. Nobody likes you, OTHURA. You need to wear more clothes and get a makeover.



ZACHARIAS: "..."


ZACHARIAS: "...So it begins."


You are now Lord President for Life Head Coach Emperor Marshal ZACHARIAS, Dictator of the country SINZERI. Long has your country suffered attacks by outsiders, and you have spurred the country into the next century with your brilliance and your R&D team. You have the most powerful army in the world of SYNZARIA at your command. You are also completely freaking insane, and curiously obsessed with CHEESE.
Your newest MAYOR has stolen your HAT, bit your hand, and staged a COUP.
What do you do?
>_

[McBatman]

>Determine what parties would resort to sending such a small sleeper agent, impose super maximum martial law, considering you already run a military state.

[PersonPerson]

Look at some animals.

[MistahSly]

Zacharias: Perform the ancient art of Breakdance Divination to locate your hat.

[mythLeader]

Clearly you need a SLEEPER AGENT in your enemy's camp to learn his plans. Command one of your LOYAL MINIONS to swear fealty to the new mayor and infiltrate his regime.

[Deif]

Zacharias: Perform the ancient art of Breakdance Divination to locate your hat.

You are unversed in BREAKDANCE DIVINIATION. Infact you know no magic whatsoever.
...You still breakdance, because why the hell not?

Look at some animals.

Clearly you need a SLEEPER AGENT in your enemy's camp to learn his plans. Command one of your LOYAL MINIONS to swear fealty to the new mayor and infiltrate his regime.

Animals? This is ... a pet store? ...Huh.
Also, to get a minion going, you're gonna need to get back to your HEADQUARTERS.

>Determine what parties would resort to sending such a small sleeper agent, impose super maximum martial law, considering you already run a military state.

Obviously it's the work of those evil little things that sneak into your room and eat your underpants. THEY MUST BE STOPPED.
ZACHARIAS: "CITIZENS HEAR ME, AND SPREAD THE WORD. WE ARE NOW UNDER EPIC MARTIAL LAW."


ZACHARIAS: "It's time for the wiffle bats to come out."

>_