Trollbound

[benedictusk]

> FTFO for a minute, then scream WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WHY ARE YOU HERE DID YOU EAT SALLY?!?!?!!?!?!?

You do that. The horned creature gestures for you to calm down, and assures you he did not eat Sally. You don't trust him.
It's time to activate your ultimate survival instinct.

>Pretend to be Sponge Bob as a survival instinct or some dog mush

>Morlek: Kill this guy for being a tool.

You would love to do that. However, this kid may be your only ticket out of this absurd planet, so you'll have to wait for him to fix your ship. Also, he appears to have become a sponge, and you're not exactly sure how to kill those.

You've got to do something to calm this kid down.

>

[Loather of Irk]

Calm him down with some of your illicit space drugs

[audaciousAdmin]

((Upload your pictures to Tinypic.))

Give him the hand treatment.

[benedictusk]

Calm him down with some of your illicit space drugs

These Mind Capsules are the only drugs you have, and you don't think this weak alien species could handle them, especially since taking more than one per day is considered deadly, even for trolls. They are not, however, illicit. In fact, their daily use is strongly encouraged by the Troll Empress.
You yourself are incapable of taking them so often because they make you feel really sick. You took one yesterday, which may or may not have been the reason you crashed your ship. You honestly can't remember.

Give him the hand treatment.

You truly are a genius. You have no idea if this is actually calming him down, but it feels great.



You are now Sally.

>

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Thanks for the gif advice, aA!

[Thycora]

> Sally: Politely ask Morlek to stop beating up Freddy. Introduce Freddy to Morlek, and Morlek to Freddy. Everyone will be friends! Yay!

[benedictusk]

> Sally: Politely ask Morlek to stop beating up Freddy. Introduce Freddy to Morlek, and Morlek to Freddy. Everyone will be friends! Yay!

You can't do this because you're still on your way to the park.



You realize you have some unread messages on your phone. You must not have noticed them during your encounter with the thugs.

SchemingMantis: Hey.
SchemingMantis: Sally.
SchemingMantis: Did you see that crazy explosion?
SchemingMantis: I think the mad scientist caused it.
SchemingMantis: After our meeting, I'm going to go investigate.
SchemingMantis: Because I am just that courageous.
SchemingMantis: Hang on. Some dude just appea

Hmm. It's not like Freddy to leave a sentence incomplete. He must have been pretty freaked out by the troll. You hope they're getting along.

You'd better hurry so as not to keep them waiting.

Minutes in the future, but not many...



What is going on here?!

> Sally: Politely ask Morlek to stop beating up Freddy. Introduce Freddy to Morlek, and Morlek to Freddy. Everyone will be friends! Yay!

Who's Morlek?
You tell the troll to stop hitting Freddy, and he does, but Freddy is still out of control.



>

[Thycora]

> I think Freddy needs a cool-down hug. Give him one!

[audaciousAdmin]

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I lost my shit at those last two gifs.

>Assume this is some weird alien mating ritual

[xeroticDeceiver]

> Give Freddy a calming trachea-hug with your hands.

[Dalmationer]

> Give Freddy a calming trachea-hug with your hands.

Do this. In the face. With a hammer. Really hard.

[benedictusk]

> Give Freddy a calming trachea-hug with your hands.

Very funny. Freddy can be a bother when he's freaking out or trying to be cool, but he's still a good friend. You would never hurt him.

Do this. In the face. With a hammer. Really hard.

Where are these violent thoughts coming from? Perhaps it's all the stress you've been under lately.

> I think Freddy needs a cool-down hug. Give him one!

Now here's a good idea!

>Assume this is some weird alien mating ritual

You are so confused right now. Especially since the alien performing the ritual doesn't have romantic feelings for the other one.
Oh well. At least Freddy seems to have calmed down. Maybe now you can get him to be useful.

Morlek: Freddy!
Freddy: What? Hey, how do you know my name?
Sally: Freddy, this is a troll from outer space. I told him your name.
Freddy: Oh, so he's not telepathic.
Sally: Actually, he is.

A whirlwind of ridiculously embarassing thoughts engulf your telepathic sensors. You wish there was a way to turn this thing off while you're around idiots like Freddy.

Morlek: Listen, Freddy. I need you to repair my space ship. Do you think you can do that?
Freddy: I don't know. How bad is it?
Morlek: Come. I'll show you.



You take Sally and Freddy to your damaged ship.

You have an unexpected visitor.

>

[Mibbs]

ITS HEARTS BOXCARS

[Thycora]

ITS HEARTS BOXCARS

I'm sorry I just almost spit out my drink all over the keybaord. I cant-

> Morlek: Use your AWESOME POWERS to PCHOOOO this guy away from your spaceship.

[audaciousAdmin]

>ET: emerge from ship

[xeroticDeceiver]

> Droog: Give 'em some proper pool cue drubbings.

[Absol]

>Hearts: Run off with the loot you just got.

[Loather of Irk]

Challenge Hearts Boxcars to a dance-off

[Lieutenant Fish]

>Do a 180

[OrangeAipom]

Was that a sponge or food?

[Shotajesus]

Challenge Hearts Boxcars to a dance-off

Yes I like this

[Dalmationer]

Challenge Hearts Boxcars to a dance-off

that's not hearts boxcars, that's clubs deuce.

[xeroticDeceiver]

> Diamonds Droog: Drub the AUDIENCE mercilessly.

[benedictusk]

Sorry for the lack of updates. I am currently visiting my family in Argentina, and while I do have Internet access, I will not be able to work on this often, so don´t expect a lot of updates over the next two weeks. I will try to finish up the update I was working on by tomorrow.

[Loather of Irk]

that's not hearts boxcars, that's clubs deuce.

whatever, nerd

[Dalmationer]

> Diamonds Droog: Drub the AUDIENCE mercilessly.

clubs deuce*