Experiment: who's the douchiest troll?

[cpupett]

Decide, who is the most annoying/irritating/mean troll of them all!

Post if you have an other character in mind.

(
Nepeta: 0
Feferi: 0
Worcestershire sauce: 1 <- not a troll
uu: 2? <- not a troll
Timey-wimey paradoxical mobius double reach around shenanigan-based phenomena: 1 <- ...Guess
Meenah: 1
Cronus: 3
)

[lunarKnights]

If you want to go by just plain douchy-ness, I'd have to go with Sollux. All the other "mean" trolls are just manipulative or psychotic.

[Absol]

^What this smart fella said.

[cpupett]

Well, you are right. Though don't forget that even though the other trolls may be only manipulative/genocidal, some of them are just annoying.

[kingotavio]

All of the Trolls (with some exceptions) have been douches at some point. But the one that screwed up everything was Gamzee. Apart from being, probably, the most powerful member of the group and not attacking the Black King a single time, he planted the harlequins in John's life, he killed Equius, Nepeta, made Terezi think Vriska had killed everyone, set a trap were he intended to exterminate the rest of the Trolls and would have succeed if not by Karkat's shooshs and paps. It's true that he is a highblood, thus more inclined to violence than the others, but I think he went a bit too far.

On a side note, I like all the Trolls, Gamzee included, I just think he is a extremely unstable and powerful guy.

[cpupett]

True, true, though don't forget that he was a crazy clown and high almost always. His deeds might have been unintended. How did that go? Power comes with...

[tantalusUnchaste]

Let's not overlook Eridan, the douche who tried to join forces with the enemy, murdered (or tried to murder) three of his friends with his science wand, and destroyed his race's only hope of repopulating.

[Tirgo]

Let's not overlook Eridan, the douche who tried to join forces with the enemy, murdered (or tried to murder) three of his friends with his science wand, and destroyed his race's only hope of repopulating.

but... he's cool!

[Nimz]

I am shocked SHOCKED that you used the 10 option limitation on polls to leave out the two douchiest trolls of all! Ummm, let's see. Where do I begin? Oh. Okay, it's those two. Um, okay.

Uh, yeah. Nepeta, she knew her friend was unhappy with her hunting, but still proceeded to tell him all about it in gruesome detail. Way to go, Nepeta.
And Feferi... you see how little screentime she gets? It's obvious that she's such a douche that not even Andrew can stand her. Yeah. Yeah, that's it.

That said, my real poll response would be Worcestershire sauce.
Actually, in the sense of 'a shower of water', Feferi does fit the rôle of douche quite well...

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

And my real poll response would be why is this not in the main comic discussion board

[Tirgo]

also the lack of votes for equius disturbs me

[kingotavio]

Why would it disturb you?

[Tirgo]

Why would it disturb you?

because equius is a huge douche?

[Ekul]

because equius is a huge douche?

The only thing really douchey that he's done is program a robot body to love him. He hasn't even harmed any of the other trolls, so far as we know. Equius and Karkat are the only trolls that have not attempted Troll-on-troll violence onscreen.

He's not a nice guy, but he's also not all that selfish, especially compared to some of the other trolls.

[Tirgo]

The only thing really douchey that he's done is program a robot body to love him. He hasn't even harmed any of the other trolls, so far as we know. Equius and Karkat are the only trolls that have not attempted Troll-on-troll violence onscreen.

He's not a nice guy, but he's also not all that selfish, especially compared to some of the other trolls.

no he is pretty much a gigantic asshole

also hemospectrum

[amiableTemplar]

no he is pretty much a gigantic asshole

also hemospectrum

Which he almost exclusively uses either as justification for not talking to particular people, or as a way to feed his (desperate?) fetishes. Equius very rarely speaks to anyone, doesn't troll anyone, actively helps in several situations (including helping the "fudgeblood" with new legs and instructing him in their use, mind), and generally only acts douche-y when trying to use his blood status to convince someone else to do something...which never actually works except with Nepeta. And that's almost certainly because of his moirallegiance with her, not because he's even remotely convincing.

I'm not saying he's a great guy, but as far as trolls go, he's definitely middle-of-the-road, leaning slightly towards the nicer side (which is remarkable given his position on the hemospectrum--you'd expect him to be a hyperviolent fanatic). Obviously Tavros is the nicest and Nepeta is second, since they're both basically too adorable to ever be mean, but it's hard to claim that frex Terezi's Manipulative Bastard routine, as awesome as it is, is less douche-y than a guy who is vocally racist on a planet where vocal racism is not only the norm, but government-enforced and (albeit tenuously) related to actual physiological differences ("lowbloods" live short lives even by our standards and are about as fragile as humans; "highbloods" live for centuries and can sustain massive trauma and blood loss without dying). Or that he's worse than Vriska, who paralyzed Tavros out of spite, killed Aradia because she couldn't bring herself to apologize, and killed Tavros for finally growing the fucking spine she always wanted him to have.

Yeah. Equius can be an ass; no question. Is he fucked up? Hell yeah, possibly the most mentally screwed up of the entire team, given how creepy he is about his fetishes. But the biggest douche? Not by a long shot.

Edit:
Also, voted Eridan, mostly for blowing up the Matriorb and always turning every conversation to how much his life sucks and how hard it is to be him when he really should've been thinking a bit about other people.

[Wacom Guy]

If uu was a troll...

[tantalusUnchaste]

Plus, Eridan spent almost his entire session killing angels, pissing them off and whipping them into some super-violent frenzy, and then did nothing but whine about how lonely he was and how nobody would visit him, but refused to leave his own planet because he was too busy killing angels despite this being the reason nobody would visit him and despite Karkat's repeated attempts to tell him to stop. Then there's his desperate black advances, even going so far as to try to trick Feferi into auspiticing between him and Sollux to pull them out of their Quadrant.

[cpupett]

Basically every troll is a douche in their own way. Yes, even Nepeta :P. The idea is to find out which one of them annoys the fandom most. Thank you for all of the votes.

[Snow22]

Eridan, no doubt.
He was pushy, selfish, and usually didn't take others into consideration. Not only that he was an attention hog.
All the trolls have their faults and their strong points. But he didn't really seem to have much more than his affection for Fef and his passion to kill landdwellers. :B

[Graknorke]

Terezi.
She led Karkat on into thinking they had a relationsip because she liked his blood.
She led Nepeta on into thinking she was her RP partner when actually it was to make fun at Nepeta's expense.
Upon finding Tavros' corpse she immediately tried to come up with a way of it being Vriska.
She played stupid games with Vriska despite knowing how serious shit was.
She failed to live up to holding up the law when shit actually went down, despite it being the thing she's totally obsessed about.

[cpupett]

Troll law is... Not the same as human law though.

[Graknorke]

Troll law is... Not the same as human law though.

Yes but it still can't be open for just killing everybody, at least among the highbloods. I doubt it's allowed to happen for someone to try and murder the empress for example. As far as I know troll law is effectively just to help in preserving the highest bloods, which Terezi is pretty bad at. She saw Feferi (who was lined up to be the empress) dead, and instead of trying to bring the murderer to JUST1C3, tried to find a way to pin it on Vriska.
And then cited JUST1C3 as her reason for confronting Vriska on the roof. Even after being told how her only murder was in self defence, with the 3xFACEPALM COMBO seeming to show Terezi realising how stupid it was to think they were mostly Vriska (I think anyway, might be thinking she's lying), she still goes ahead and tries to press JUST1C3.

[Ekul]

And then cited JUST1C3 as her reason for confronting Vriska on the roof. Even after being told how her only murder was in self defence, with the 3xFACEPALM COMBO seeming to show Terezi realising how stupid it was to think they were mostly Vriska (I think anyway, might be thinking she's lying), she still goes ahead and tries to press JUST1C3.

It's shown that in the end, Terezi wants to give Vriska a second chance, but won't because she knows it will lead Jack to them. She even shows remorse about killing Vriska to Aranea.

[amiableTemplar]

Terezi.
She led Karkat on into thinking they had a relationsip because she liked his blood.

False. They had been waxing flushed for a while before she figured out his blood color, and their first forays into actual relationship status were over the course of a couple weeks at most, and probably less. They've had to deal with some of the most ridiculous, difficult shit you can imagine (friends killing friends, killing a friend herself, losing their dream selves, etc.) so it's not exactly weird that their attachment has been wavering at best.

She led Nepeta on into thinking she was her RP partner when actually it was to make fun at Nepeta's expense.

Questionable. If so, she goes to incredible lengths to make fun of Nepeta, including dressing up in a dragon suit and setting up future times for continuing RP interaction. Either she's so incredibly dedicated to making fun of Nepeta (in a way that she doesn't discuss with anyone else), or she actually enjoys it.

Upon finding Tavros' corpse she immediately tried to come up with a way of it being Vriska.

...ironically the one person Vriska actually did kill? And it's not like Vriska and Tavros' love/hate relationship was unknown to the group as a whole.

She played stupid games with Vriska despite knowing how serious shit was.

I fail to see what you're talking about, unless you're referring to her games of one-upmanship with regard to the humans...whom none of the trolls were particularly serious about until long after the most serious offenses had already been committed. Remember, the coin toss bit was no game. Both "players" knew what was going on.

She failed to live up to holding up the law when shit actually went down, despite it being the thing she's totally obsessed about.

1. Alternian Law, as stated, is quite a bit different from any human laws.
2. Howso? She killed someone who was a known dangerous person, murderess, and who was going to do something foolish that would result in everyone else dying. It might not have been pleasant--certainly Terezi mentions her regrets and desire for some other option--but it was necessary, and possibly the "lawful" thing to do by Alternian standards. Cull one to save the many? Sounds pretty well in keeping with His Honorable Tyranny's reptuation.
3. Before she had a chance to extract justice from Eridan, Kanaya killed him. Terezi was following a false lead at the time anyway (being intentionally misled by Gamzee, probably in the hopes that more trolls would die), but I doubt she disapproved of the result.
4. Regardless of whether Vriska was guilty of the murders of the others, she certainly was guilty of Tavros' murder, and Tavros attacked her to "stop" her from continuing to do the dangerous activities she planned that would threaten the lives of her fellow group members. Neither we nor she knew if he would have killed her, but it's fair to say that he certainly wasn't a sufficiently significant threat. Remember, at least in US law, "self defense" is only an acceptable defense if you actually have cause to believe that someone will try to kill you AND you have reason to believe you can't escape or subdue without killing. Compare a person holding you at gunpoint 50 feet away while you're both on foot, versus a person coming at you with a knife when you're in a car. In the former case, you have almost no options--a gun can kill you from a much greater range than that. In the latter case, you can almost certainly take off and are in very little danger. Going in gun in hand and killing the assailant is not self-defense in that case; it's murder. If Alternian concepts of "self defense" are similar to US law, I sincerely doubt any legal professional (as Terezi probably considers herself) would call his death "self-defense"--he didn't even scratch her, and she then disarmed him and killed him with his own lance.