Experiment: who's the douchiest troll?

[AProcrastinatingWriter]

No I mean I really don't understand why this isn't in Comic Discussion

[amiableTemplar]

No I mean I really don't understand why this isn't in Comic Discussion

Timey-wimey paradoxical mobius double reach around shenanigan-based phenomena.

That's my vote anyway.

[ASBusinessMagnet]

Meenah because she killed all the trolls of her group AND herself.

Even if they were about to be erased from existence, there were other ways to escape that, and the B1 session demonstrated that.

[Captain Combusken]

ERIDAN ERIDAN ERIDAN ERIDAN ERIDAN ERIDAN
ERIDAN
ERIDAN ERIDAN.

It could never be any other troll. Eridan is the douchelord. it's him.

[Arcanum]

All of the Trolls (with some exceptions) have been douches at some point. But the one that screwed up everything was Gamzee. Apart from being, probably, the most powerful member of the group and not attacking the Black King a single time, he planted the harlequins in John's life, he killed Equius, Nepeta, made Terezi think Vriska had killed everyone, set a trap were he intended to exterminate the rest of the Trolls and would have succeed if not by Karkat's shooshs and paps. It's true that he is a highblood, thus more inclined to violence than the others, but I think he went a bit too far.

On a side note, I like all the Trolls, Gamzee included, I just think he is a extremely unstable and powerful guy.

CCG: HE'S COMPLETELY SNAPPED, AND FOR THOSE OF YOU FURTHER AHEAD ON THE TIMELINE, I DON'T HAVE TO TELL YOU HOW DANGEROUS HE IS.
CCG: REMEMBER WHAT HE DID TO THE BLACK KING.
CCG: NOBODY COULD EXPLAIN IT, AND THEN HE JUST WENT BACK TO SPACING OUT FOR THE REST OF THE BATTLE.
CCG: I MEAN SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT.
CCG: I DON'T EVEN THINK THE KING COULD FUCKING BELIEVE IT, FRANKLY.
CCG: DID ANYONE'S ATTACK DO AS MUCH DAMAGE? I DON'T THINK SO.
CCG: I DON'T EVEN THINK VRISKA'S DID, ALTHOUGH IT'S HARD TO SAY SINCE THAT WAS THE KNOCKOUT BLOW.

When you order Rex Duodecim Angelus (along with the rest of Alterniabound) from the bandcamp site, you get a little explanation of the song, which is a pretty close, if not completely accurate canon order of how the fight went down. The second to last part of the song? The horrifying honking section belonging to Gamzee. If anything, he was the most useful troll during Versus Black King, if not the second, depending on if Vriska ended up doing more damage or not (which Karkat doesn't even know).

Otherwise yeah, as a highblood, he was more inclined to violence, especially since he was coming down from a hallucinogen. He was in withdrawal, and people going through withdrawal tend to be a little more aggressive and angry than they normally would be.

Meenah because she killed all the trolls of her group AND herself.

Even if they were about to be erased from existence, there were other ways to escape that, and the B1 session demonstrated that.

Actually, Meenah killing her entire group was probably the least douche-iest thing she could've done. She could've let them get obliterated by the Scratch, to not live in the dream bubbles afterwards, but instead decided to let them keep 'living' by sending them to dream bubbles.

By killing them, she preserved their existences. That doesn't sound very douche-y to me.

Also, based on how the A1 troll culture wasn't based around violence like the A2 instance, and that they didn't have an omnipotent and enraged demigod rampaging through their session or a bomb to explode in the middle of paradox space, its likely the only one who ascended was Aranea. They wouldn't have had a method to just leave the session (like Dave and Rose), or have a fourth wall or a competent, powerful GT Hero of Space to fly a giant space ship through said fourth wall.

[_Quietus_]

Eridan
Didn't even have to consider that
Nobody likes hipsters
And if they do it's not for being a hipster

[Phantos]

Kanaya keeps it clean. 100% douchemaster.

I love that this is basically the one house on fire in the entire city, and no one is going to touch it with a ten-foot pail of water because

[Wheel Thrown]

Gamzee's douchiness is greatly underrated. He worked so hard at being so terrible, but we keep forgetting.

And this is a very polite discussion of douchiness, haha. I mean, the characters in Homestuck are all pretty terrible, but I think objectively speaking Gamzee's done pretty well for himself in the douche category.

[Viikuna]

I think we're confusing the "douchiness" of each troll for how antagonizing they were. Gamzee was evil, sure, but a douche? Not so much. I find Equius to be the douchiest of the trolls, when it comes down to it. He lives according to a antiquated dogma of what's technically troll racism. His chief incentive for aiding Aradia was having a means to "force" her into a romance with him. He was also much too wrapped up in fetishism and acquiescence to the hemospectrum to stop the very real threat in Gamzee when he encountered him, something he was implied to be more than capable of doing. This led to the death of Nepeta, the desecretion of more than a few corpses and God knows what else Gamzee's currently up to.

Face it, Equius takes the cake. He's a douche.

[ImperatorMortis]

Its tied between Cronus, and Kankri for me. But I voted Vriska.

Edit: And now I feel I should have voted Eridan.

[Dentrala]

Eridan, Equius and Sollux I can fully understand. But Vriska? She wasn't a douche, she was just shortsighted and selfish. And annoying, depending on the opinion of the reader.

[Yayz]

I voted Vriska, but that was probably because of my brother's influence on me. Now that I've read too many fan-comics I'd say it's either Eridan or Equius. I like Equius (since my brother did [dang him!]), but now that I'm watching the Let's Read I realize just HOW much of a douche he is.

Also Eridan for dooming their entire race in a fit of rage.

[CertifiedOwl]

They may not be a troll, but: uu.

[curiousTerminal]

Cronus.
Not only is he a douche, he's a douche without (current) story purpose.

[ASBusinessMagnet]

Meenah because she killed all the trolls of her group AND herself.

Even if they were about to be erased from existence, there were other ways to escape that, and the B1 session demonstrated that.

Taking back. Meenah said Cronus is a douche, hence, Cronus must be the douchiest.

[spatialWanderer]

I cAn'T sTaNd VrIsKa, BuT sHe DiD rEdEeM hErSeLf A lItTlE.

[orangenelly]

I love how in the poll, Nepeta is so UN-douchey that's she's not even on the scale.
And I think, out of the entire story, the douchiest character would have to be Cronus for me. Because, unlike Eridan who doomed his species or LE destroying entire universes, Cronus is horrible in a more realistic way for me.
From 1st to 5th grade, I was very badly bullied about everything. How I looked, how I acted, and for my ADHD and medication. Now I go to a school for people with learning disablities, and most of my friends are somewhere are on Autism Spectrum. So for Cronus to treat Mituna the way his did, and to touch Mituna in a way he didn't like, that's not okay.

[AmericanWonderland]

Let's not overlook Eridan, the douche who tried to join forces with the enemy, murdered (or tried to murder) three of his friends with his science wand, and destroyed his race's only hope of repopulating.

I completely agree.