Loftlocked

[Pat-Man12]

Begin.

A young man stands in his bedroom. Today happens to be 04/04/09, which happens to not be this boy's birthday; that won't happen for another month. Instead, today (which is about five weeks from his actual birthday), is the day he and his friends play a game, of which was almost definitely obtained illegally, unfortunately. This game, the "highly touted SBURB Beta", which was supposed to come out on the 10th, will take this young man and his friends on a journey which will change their lives. He does not know this yet. Among other things he does not know yet is his name, for he has yet to be named, and he has no intention of waiting for his birthday for that honor. What will the name of this young man be?

[benevolentBaroness]

>Spikyhair Animuton

Alternatively,

>Adam Linwood.

[Sneak.QQ]

>Gorblesnatch von Humperdink

[Pat-Man12]

Enter name.

Really? You know what? No. You don't have time, nor the arm room to take this shit, you're naming your self.

[Sneak.QQ]

>Try Again

[Pat-Man12]

Try Again.

Yes. You like that. You like that a-- GOD DAMMIT GET THAT DUMB EXPRESSION OFF YOUR FACE!

[Bearstronaut]

Assume a more hard boiled expression, then look around your room.
EDIT: Find the button in your room. Sir Adamus is right.

[Sir Adamus]

> Find button. Push button. Receive bacon.

[Pat-Man12]

===>

Your name is Pat Robinson, and you tend to be naive. As previously mentioned, you are planning on playing an leaked copy of SBURB BETA. As such, it is illegal. You do not enjoy breaking the law like this, but living in a third-world country has its downsides, one of which is having to wait a month after the game's official release to be able to purchase it locally. Not that you have the money, nor the potential allowence. This country you live in is INDONESIA, which to save time, you usually refer as "south of China". In the room, south of China, a number of posters and PAGES are pasted on your walls, which show off your interests. You mainly like to draw, but love anything related to graphics, especially on computers, and you in fact have gotten rather good at pixel art, if you say so your self; some examples of your lay on the the other wall. You tend to SPACE out, thinking about what ever the hell runs through your mind. This can get bothersome, but you deal with it. Whenever you're not being a spacey, bossy asshole, you're usually pretty shy, which your brother tends to give you grief about, but you also deal with this. Your game is currently downloading on your LAPTOP, and at the moment, you're bored! What will you do?

[Elita Again]

> Examine closet room.

[Pat-Man12]

Pat: Examine closet room.

In your small room, which you constantly complain about, are some boxes from when you moved houses. You moved here a year ago, but they just continue to remain there for no apparent reason. For that reason, you tend to bitterly call the room a supply closet. This is one of the reasons why you bother downloading Sburb on your weak internet speed. Speaking of the download, you wonder how that's going?

[Sir Adamus]

Ignore download. Find a button, press it, and recieve bacon.

[Pat-Man12]

Pat: Ignore download. Find a button, press it, and receive bacon.

YOU CULTURALLY IGNORANT BASTARD! DON'T YOU KNOW THAT BACON IS ILLEGAL IN THIS COUNTRY?! IF EATEN, THE PUNISHMENT IS DEATH!


Welcome to hell...

Not really, you're just out of bacon for the week. Buying pork goods in these parts can be a bitch.

[Menen]

>Be less obvious about you being a Space Player

>Get on Pesterchum!

[Thycora]

> See if any of your friends are playing the game already.

[pkfl_531]

> Make out with Steve on your Minecraft poster.

[Sir Adamus]

Examine oddly placed pillow on bed.

[Pat-Man12]

Pat: Be less obvious about you being a Space Player

SPAAAAAAAAAAAACE!
Pat: Get on Pesterchum!


Seems like nobody's on. Isn't all that surprising, most of your friends live on the other side of the world, and it's 3 am at the East Coast...
Though your best friend should be on at this hour...maybe you can talk to him later?

You also check on your download's progress, which you have been doing on and off all day. It's at 60% now, and there seems to be a lot of seeders. Won't be long now...

[Bearstronaut]

See if your friend is online. If not, look outside the window.

[Sir Adamus]

If friend is not online, do a flying fucking pirouette off the handle and dive out the window.

[benevolentBaroness]

>Horribly reenact an Indonesian drama, exaggerating the dramatic parts even more dramatically.

((I'm sorry, I live in a neighbouring country, and I can't help but poke fun at their totally dramatic dramas that air on tv.))

[Pat-Man12]

Pat: Examine oddly placed pillow on bed.

You examine your Pillows. You like pillows, but you wouldn't wield a pillow, you like them too much. Rather than having stuffed animals, you have pillows (stuffed animals are for babies). You really like your pillows.

[Pat-Man12]

Pat: Make out with Steve on your Minecraft poster.

Feeling rather random, you decide to make out with your poster.
God this is hot. "Steve. Ravish me." you say with a cold sweat.

You decide to stop this before this turns into 'Fifty Shades of Cube'.

[Pat-Man12]

Horribly reenact an Indonesian drama, exaggerating the dramatic parts even more dramatically.

You fall over, and drop and shatter the fine china you were holding. You begin to cry, after a long hard day of being a servant, this happens. Your evil, jealous, greedy step-mother laughs at your failure, simultaneously plotting your demise and keeping you from the man you love. To add insult to injury, it turns out she was the one who tripped you! LE GASP! THE DRAMA! THE AUDIENCE LOVES THIS FOR SOME REASON! THIS IS STUPID!

[pkfl_531]

> Open boxes on the corner of your room. Maybe you'll find some bacon.