Gamblers of the Galaxies

[Cidellus]

"All right, then," nodded Septim, smiling as he put down one of his special white gold-rimmed shot glasses. Turning around, he began mixing one hell of a drink before turning around and filling the shot glass. "This here is a Septim Shot! One will get you buzzed, two will get you smashed, three will see you dead. In order to drink the third one, I'll need a waiver from you and your funeral arrangements."

[A Killer Cuppa Tea]

Tea was in shock that he had not only won, but won big. When he finay came to his senses, he went all in again, on the same faction he had before.

[Demonsul]

The lights dimmed, and the holographic display at the heart of the circular room reignited. Stars, white pinpricks tinged with blue, ignited in a spiral shape. Green spread from one side of the galaxy, a dull red from the other. The green spread faster, but the red was more intense in the systems it controlled. Screens of great, if simplistic, cities appeared to one side, while sleek ships and stations appeared on the other.

But all was not well with the Hizardés. By sheer bad luck, the path their advanced weapons development took in this game's iteration was one that the Ludds could easily counter. Their powerful striking weaponry, which was a key point in their victory over the Cesarites, was suddenly only as strong as the Ludds' own basic armaments. Their lack of heavy armor came back to haunt them as the Ludds' own simplistic plating took the brunt of their assault without too much issue. But all was not lost; the Ludds' poor targeting computers and prediction technology meant that the Hizardés still had speed on their side, and they used it fantastically. Battles became similar to how they had been in the first war; the Hizardés ducking and diving between Ludd ships, blowing them to kingdom come when the opportunity arose. Although the Ludds had vast reserves, the Hizardés blasted the hell out of them as soon as they were spotted, and they could not be deployed effectively to the field.

The Ludds remained strong in the face of this adversity, but lacked the tactical organization of the Hizardés previous foes. Their great reserve of ships was gradually eroded as the Hizardés pushed the galactic frontline further and further forward into Ludd space. The Hizardés were faster and their technology was more advanced, and although their weapons by sheer bad luck were not stronger, they nevertheless pounded the Ludds back to their home system, where their planet was blasted into asteroid rubble by an epic bombardment.

The galaxy was wiped from existence. The victors went to collect their winnings, while the losers sat dejected by the bar.

LEADERBOARD:
A.K.C. Tea Esq.: 300 XC
Boss Kocel: 110 XC
SmilingRocket: 110 XC
Vancho: 110 XC
Galloglasses: 100 XC
SupahKiven: 85 XC
Qualien: 82 XC
UraniumArc: 80 XC
Palamedes: 80 XC
Vortor: 75 XC
DenizenShipper: 75 XC
Purple Walrus: 50 XC

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EDIT: An aside about the weapons thing: The rolls were so fantastically lucky in favor of the Ludds for that, they managed to equalize the offensive score between the two, the best possible outcome considering their vastly different scores. The odds of that happening as perfectly as it did were over one in nine million. Unfortunately, the Ludds also got really unlucky in the fields where they actually dominated (numbers, morale) and thus lost.

[Palamedes]

Prime Minister Palamedes grins at the barkeep.

"Excellent, I like the efficiency."

However, his smile turns to a frown when he looks at the score. He takes his shot and downs it in a second.

"Stupid lousy lizards."

Obviously one of the Italies were having issues with some sort of lizard race since there's no way he could be talking about the Hizardés - after all they were a race that only existed in illegal gambling circuits and he'd never be part of something that shady.

[A Killer Cuppa Tea]

The odds of that happening as perfectly as it did were over one in nine million.

over one in nine million.

one in nine million.

Guys.

This doesn't bode well for my string of bad luck.

(Luckily, i skillfully outmanoeuvred my bad luck by picking the correct faction!)

[Galloglasses]

Galloglasses breathes a sigh of relief through his not-mouth and takes a sip of his Tears of Titania he had been holding for the better part of half an hour as more and more weird people came into the station, the Butler, who he assumed was representing a party who didnt feel like showing their face, had burst into flames, a Texan blew his way into the main room, an INCREDIBLY garrish cat lady stole his whisky, an assortment of other chucklefucks also arrived and... oh, there's Palamedes havent seen him since the last time he got out to do a bit of high stakes gambling.

Galloglasses could afford to be known to frequent such gambling dens, Palamedes on the other hand, could not. He made sure to file that away in his memory if he ever needed to blackmail Palamedes for a Friday night's amusement.

Sipping the tears of Titania he got an insight on the guilt of the Queen of the Faeries. My has she been an unfaithful wife and... oh God those poor children... AND THAT DOG! WOW! He was pretty sure metal was never supposed to do tha-Ok that memory was just creepy.

The side effect of a Tears of Titania is that you got an insight of whatever creature whose tears make up part of the drink, so long as those tears were unwilling.

So no robbing wakes and funeral houses for crying grannies then.

"Thats better," He made a note on Titania's shenanigans to blackmail her later with... or you know, let the rumours circulate around the grapevine up in Yggdrasil... So long as Heaven doesn't find out, he's been in enough trouble with the Heavenly Hosts as is what with accidentally becoming a minor god when he really wasn't supposed to.

"Barkeep" He said, a hankering coming upon him, "Can you get me a fertilized dragon egg? Fresh please. And don't cook it. No seriously don't, it'll hatch."

[Demonsul]

Preparations for the third battle have begun...the VANJINII will be fighting the SCHUPES!

The Vanjinii are a scientific and inquisitive race. Sprad thin over their stars, each Vanjinn is a being that exists slightly outside of normal matter, giving it a slightly etheric appearance. They are individually weak and cowardly, but their advanced scientific design has allowed them to build large, powerful ships with digital-precision tactics and targeting. The Schupes, meanwhile, are a populous, proud and burly warrior race that thinks with their...weapons. Vaguely crocodilian by appearance, they fight as a unified force, prize honor and skill in their society and fondly regard tradition. They are jacks-of-all-fighting, strong in many fields but slightly weak technologically.

The odds are even - victory will double your money either way. Minimum bet is 50 XC. Let the betting begin!

[Palamedes]

Palamedes thinks for some time... before motioning to his attendant and whispering something into his ear - something about dirty reptiles.

This is totally legitimate.

Eventually the aide moves back to the betting attendant, with another slip of paper.

50 on the Vanjinii

[SupahKiven]

The monster sighs, glancing at the minimum bet. At bit much, he thinks, but hey, he's got spare change. "50 on the Schupes. And could I get some food? Maybe a space worm roast, if you have it."

[Qualien]

Q contemplates his decisions this time around, as opposed to last time. After a moment, he places down all 82 XC on the Schupes, hoping their numbers will snuff out the glass cannon of an opponent. He takes another sip of the boiling liderin, which was still quite hot despite how long it has been sitting.

[Kocel232]

"Heh, lookit them Vangenie folk, Cletus! They're more pathetic than you! Nice ships, but no balls to back 'em up! I'm going in with 50 on the Shlubs! Or Schloobies. Whatever their damn weird alien name is."

He slams back another shot of whiskey. When he goes to refill his glass, however, he finds it empty.

"Huh. Didn't think I drank the whole bottle yet."

He turns to look at his gang, all of who but Cletus are collapsed drunkenly on the floor. Boss Kocel raises an eyebrow.

"What in tarnation... CLETUS! What happened? They normally don't drink themselves out this quickly."

Cletus looked up from his half-finished stick of celery.

"W-w-well, Boss, see, those wings were apparently mighty hot. So the guys, they were trying to drown it out with the whiskey, and, well..."

"Oh... Well, a damn shame they can't hold their liquor better. Best let 'em sleep it off. Bartender! I need me another bottle of that there whiskey! And go ahead and throw in some grub, too! That weird feller down yonder got me in the mood for Dragon. Give me some Malvarian Dragon Oysters."

Malvarian Dragon Oysters, of course, were the more gentile name for deep-fried dragon-balls.

[A Killer Cuppa Tea]

Tea laughs uprociously, slightly tipsy on some alien beverage or another.

"bwahahaha! ALL IN ON THE SCHUPES!!!"

[Vortor]

Ehhh. While history tells me they're unliikely to win, 50 on the Vanjini, I suppose. It seems like it's almost the same battle as last time, though. Also I wonder, was the fact that the hizardes had just been in a war taken into account for their strength?
Hm... Numbers, tactics, skill on the schupe side, big shields, big armor, good weapons and targetting systems (and speed?) on the vanjini side. I wonder if they have drones? That would lessen the effect of the schupes outnumbering them.

[Cidellus]

Septim nodded at all the customers before suddenly rocketing around behind the bar at an inhuman speed. Within a few seconds, all orders are filled...except for Gallo's, that is. Considering the restaurant is separate from the bar and is owned exclusively by SCG Enterprises rather than the MYSTERIOUS GAMBLING OVERLORD, it actually has a significant right to refuse service to a man who promised a large tip for a unique order, then jipped him.

"I trust that everything is well-cooked and prepared to your satisfaction?" Septim asked his customers after serving them all.

[Galloglasses]

Galloglasses wonders briefly why Septim didnt fulfil his orders.

Then the penny drops.

So he drops the penny.

"Oh. Right, your tip." Gallo puts an exacredit on the counter and slids it across to Septim.

[Cidellus]

Septim took it, nodded at Gallo, then jumped inside his footlocker for a few moments before emerging with his fertilized dragon egg and some steak fries on the side. The steak fries were coated in what appeared to be ordinary salt, but was actually specifically designed to drain the hydration from your body.

"And there you are," Septim said, hovering the meal to Gallo's table.

[Galloglasses]

"Excellent... oh damnit, the egg is warm, I'll save this for later when it cools down..." Gallo puts the Dragon Egg in his personal hammerspace. "Thanks anyway man, here's another exacredit."

"Oh and uh, 50 on the LizardssssssssssssssssOHGODWATERWATERWATER!!" Gallo the ludicrously salty side Septim gave him.

[Cidellus]

Septim hovered a tall glass of water over to the whiny Irishman, disappointed in his inability to handle Ultrasalt.

[UraniumArc]

"Tch, what a shame." Vincent takes a swig of his potent drink and a surge is sent through his body invigorating him. "50 minimum, eh? Hell I'll go 51 on the SCHUPES." Vincent feels a hunger coming on.
"Hey Septim, you got any Vanderrbeast meat back there? I'd like a cut of it, and bring me a Drokian blood sauce for it as well."

[Kocel232]

"Fifty MINIMUM? What? I didn't want to vote no MINIMUM! I change my bet to 75 on the Shoobies! That's how a MAN bets, I tell you what!"

[Vancho1]

Hmm, how unfortunate. Still, I'm ahead of a large majority of the rest.

I'll take a bit of a risk and say 60 on the VANJINII.

Also, I'll have a Svaq.

[Purple Walrus]

"Minimum bet is 50! Shit! Thats like... all my exacredits!" he pauses for a moment, tapping his flippers, pondering " You know what, Fuck it! You only live once! I'm putting 50 on the SCHUPES they look tough enough! And to make this even more interesting! If I lose I'm paying for everyone's drinks! FOR THE REST OF THE NIGHT!"

[Demonsul]

A brand new galaxy lit up on the holographic display as betting closed. The white dots at either end of opposing spiral arms started turning pale blue and dark blue. The two nations grew and prospered, before meeting for the first time in the core. The Schupes took the initiative, launching an immediate blitzkrieg campaign deep into Vanjinn space. However, their belligerent camaraderie could only take them so far. Heavily AI-assisted Vanjinn dreadnoughts formed into perfect fleets and launched flawless projectiles with unerring accuracy. The Schupes weapons were usually strong enough to break the Vanjinn armor, but the same was true in the reverse. Neither had an advantage to attack or defense. The Schupes were more numerous, but the Vanjinn digitally guided tactics gave them a decisive edge.

The tide began to turn decisively against the Schupes. The Schupes adapted their tactics to counter the rigid AI-guided fleets of the Vanjinn, and managed to slow their advance. However, during a battle over the crucial titanium-70 producing Rostevesh system, something strange happened. The leading Vanjinii dreadnought turned, firing upon its comrades and purging its crew into space. The strange happenings spread, and soon the entire Vanjinii empire was in chaos. The Schupes realized that they were witnessing an AI uprising in process, and decisively pressed the advantage. With fractured systems infighting amongst one another, resistance to the Schupes armada collapsed. Neither the Vanjinii or the AI rebels could face them apart, and by the time the AIs realized the ill logic of fighting their masters in the face of the greater threat, it was already too late.

The Vanjinii were exterminated down to the last individual, and their sentient machines were cast into the many suns. The Schupes stood dominant over the galaxy, and with the war over, the galaxy was obliterated to make way for the next battle.

LEADERBOARD:
A.K.C. Tea Esq.: 600 XC
Boss Kocel: 185 XC
Qualien: 164 XC
Galloglasses: 148 XC
SupahKiven: 135 XC
UraniumArc: 131 XC
SmilingRocket: 110 XC
Purple Walrus: 100 XC
DenizenShipper: 75 XC
Vancho: 50 XC
Palamedes: 30 XC
Vortor: 25 XC

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The Vanjinii rolled a zero to their technology, completely nullifying their strongest stat. This basically sunk their entire campaign.

And no, the societies are generated from nil every battle, so previous battles usually have no effect on later battles.

Also the management is starting to get worried about Tea.

[UraniumArc]

"Ah, looks like we were lucky this time, eh Mr. Walrus?" Vincent rummages around in his sack and pulls out a small purple gemstone. "Here, maybe this will bring you continued luck." He says almost smiling. "Just a little something from my old days in the mine." Vincent almost has a look of nostalgia about him now.

[Kocel232]

Boss Kocel whistles impressively at Tea's winnings. He then begins to hum a familiar Earth tune...